"So, it was nice to see Bill by your side this morning at church," Rosemary commented as she mixed another batch of cookie dough. "That poor guy has been so worried about saying or doing something that would cause you to tell him he could not see Little Jack that he has been afraid to approach you."
Elizabeth sighed. She had been causing a lot of people pain with and without realizing it. Herself included. It made her wonder how these last few months had affected her son. Little Jack had not let go of Bill until the older gentleman had handed him over at her doorstep last evening. This morning, Jack had spotted Bill and squirmed from her arms, hurrying to his god father. That had been the reason Elizabeth had sat with Bill this morning at church. Even now, Jack was with Bill and Lee while Rosemary helped her cook Christmas cookies both for the class party she had planned Tuesday morning and for Ally and her friends the next afternoon when the girl finally got to go home.
"Have you ever wished you could go back and just do a whole year over?" Elizabeth asked, as she rolled out some of the cookie dough that Rosemary had already mixed.
"Well, not a whole year," Rosemary said. "I have had some moments that I wish I could go back and have handled differently. Like my arrival in Hope Valley. Not that I would want to change coming here but sometimes I do wish that I had simply chosen to let Jack go when he said he had moved past our engagement. I am not proud of some of the things I did."
Elizabeth laughed as she placed the rolling pin aside. "I was so jealous. I thought for sure Jack would see that you dressed better than me, cooked better and were just more interesting."
"Red was not your best color," Rosemary commented with a smile.
"That is for sure," Elizabeth said as she picked up a tree cookie cutter and began to cut shapes out of the dough.
As she finished stirring the dough, Rosemary set the bowl aside and turned to check on the cookies that were currently in the oven.
"Though giving me a mustache in that drawing was kind of childish, wasn't it?" Elizabeth asked as Rosemary pulled the sheet of cookies out of the oven.
Rosemary paused, cookie sheet held in a towel wrapped hand and looked over at Elizabeth. "You found that?"
"Yes, we found it," Elizabeth admitted.
"I am sorry," Rosemary said, placing the hot cookie sheet on the cooling rack. "And it was childish and kind of cruel. Jack put time into that picture and I ruined it," she admitted as she picked up another sheet of cookies that were ready for the oven.
"Jack was not too upset about that," Elizabeth told her. "He said it just gave him an excuse to draw another."
"That sounds like Jack," Rosemary said. "He always could be very forgiving. He even encouraged Lee to keep pursuing me despite my antics."
"If it makes you feel a little better, after I got over my first hurt of seeing it, that drawing actually made me feel a little better about everything," Elizabeth admitted, as she carefully moved her dough cutouts to a baking sheet. "That act showed me that you felt threatened by me as well."
Rosemary was moving the baked cookies off of the sheet. "I did feel threatened. I regretted letting Jack go, and you were the only obstacle I could see in my way of winning him back. It did not take me long to see Jack had eyes only for you."
Elizabeth blushed though she remembered doubting that very fact back then.
"Kind of like another Mountie I know," Rosemary added quietly.
"Maybe," Elizabeth replied. "But I have hurt Nathan and Ally so much already that I think it might be best just to continue to let them figure out how to move on without me."
Rosemary paused, looking pensive as she watched Elizabeth. It was clear to Elizabeth that her friend was trying to decide whether to tell her something or not.
"What is it, Rosemary?" Elizabeth asked, hoping to prompt her friend into speaking.
"You have seemed happier this week than you have in awhile, Elizabeth," Rosemary said quietly. "I know you are still trying to sort out feelings but it is good that you are finally doing that instead of hiding and running from those feelings. I don't want to say anything that might send you running in fear again."
Elizabeth nodded. It was a valid concern. "I am through running, Rosemary. If there is something you think I should know, then please tell me."
Rosemary nodded as she went back to moving the cookies off the sheet. "I had a discussion with Nathan in the library not long after you started dating Lucas. I told him about how I tried to come between you and Jack because I could not accept that Jack had moved on. I suggested that he might learn from my actions. Nathan told me that he was sorry but that he could not let you go that easily." Rosemary looked over at Elizabeth. "I do not think that Nathan has been able to let go of his love for you yet, Elizabeth. Neither does Lee. He held his tongue out of respect for your choice, but I think he still loves you."
Elizabeth gasped. Everyone seemed to be telling her the same thing. Was there truth to it?
Having moved all the cookies, Rosemary moved over to Elizabeth. "Do you love Nathan, Elizabeth?" she asked, putting an arm around her friend's shoulders.
Tears sprang to Elizabeth's eyes. "I do, Rosemary. It was always Nathan. I am not sure exactly when it started, but I realized it that first Christmas he and Ally was here in Hope Valley. I was helping him and Ally decorate the tree that I had helped them find. I purposely tried hanging a cardinal ornament too high on the tree, wanting Nathan to help me. He did, coming to stand right behind me. I remember turning and half hoping he would kiss me and the rest of me petrified that he actually would."
Rosemary smiled at her friends confession.
"Sometimes I wonder if things would have turned out differently if he had kissed me that day, before I had time to really think about anything. Before I had let the fear of losing someone else I loved, set in. Before I had let my fear of those feelings being a betrayal to Jack take hold. I know Jack said he wanted me to move on, but when that finally started to feel real, all I wanted was something safe."
"Living your life and loving someone else, is not a betrayal to Jack. I know that losing Jack was hard but losing someone we love is a part of life. I almost lost Lee in that windstorm when the tree hit him in the head. Ned almost died because of his appendix. Ally was simply playing at recess. Don't let your fear of what Nathan does, blind you to the person that he is."
Elizabeth let her friend's sink in, knowing there was truth in them. She could have lost Lucas the day of the oil rig fire just as easily as she could have lost Nathan. However, her thoughts had not been on Lucas that day. Fear had gripped her when she had seen Nathan riding in the direction where she already knew Lucas to be. Never acknowledging Lucas' overtures toward her as romantic until Nathan had admitted that he loved her.
"Nathan told me that he loved me, Rosemary," Elizabeth said, acknowledging to someone for the first time that day by the pond. "He was talking about buying land, and him and Ally settling down here and then he confessed that he loved me. All I could think about was how it had hurt to lose Jack and how it would just as much to lose Nathan, so I ran. I ran right to Lucas and accepted an official date from him for the first time. I've been running ever since."
"Then stop running, Elizabeth," Rosemary told her, turning her friend to face her so that she could embrace her properly. "Accept those feelings and all the ups and downs and fears and joys that are going to come with them."
"But what if Nathan has moved on?" Elizabeth asked.
"There is only one way to know that, Elizabeth."
"It does not seem right to bring the topic back up after everything that has happened. Especially with Ally's recovery."
"No one is saying that you need to fix everything today. Just continue to be there for them, even if that is just spending time with Ally for now. Show them that you care about them and you will know when the time is right to speak your heart."
Resting in her friends comforting embrace, Elizabeth nodded her acknowledgment of the advice. At least until a smell reached her nose.
"Are those the cookies?" Elizabeth asked, pulling back.
Rosemary hurried toward the stove and pulled out the sheet of cookies. The edges were turning black.
"Those look like some of my early cooking attempts," Elizabeth commented, coming over and looking at the cookies.
Both women burst out laughing. Elizabeth had to admit, it felt good to really laugh again.
Reaching down, Nathan picked Ally up from the bed that she had spent much of the last week in. The last couple of days, Carson had let Ally sit up in a chair for brief periods. Even that tired the girl out quickly as he body was still healing from the trauma it went through. Carson had also gotten a wheelchair for Ally to use, the doctor still insisting that at this point it was for her recovery. However, Nathan had asked that the device being taken out to his home as he intended to get Ally where she needed to be on this day.
Faith had already helped Ally dress. She had brushed out what part of Ally's hair hung down from the bandage. Once the bandages had been removed, something would need to be done with the girl's hair, as part of her head had been shaved for the surgery. However, that was a bridge that would be crossed when the time came.
As Ally rested in Nathan's arms, her hands around his neck, Faith folded and tucked a blanket around her, giving her a little more protection from the cold. With Ally in his arms, Nathan walked out of the infirmary. Immediately, there was an overwhelming sound of applause. Looking around, father and daughter noticed that almost the entire town had gathered for this moment, everyone relieved and happy that Ally was getting to go home.
Nathan's vision blurred as tears filled his eyes. Though he had felt his town's support over the past week, this display was overwhelming. Nathan even spotted Lucas in the crowd though the man stood alone near the back. As his eyes scanned the crowd, Nathan noticed Elizabeth standing with Abigail and Clara. All three women were wearing smiles.
"I am glad we stayed," Ally told him, the uninjured side of her head resting on his shoulder.
"So am I," Nathan told her, even as Lee stepped to his side and started escorting him and Ally to his waiting car.
Bill was waiting by the car. The judge held his arms out for Ally even as Lee opened the back door. Temporarily surrendering Ally to Bill, Nathan got into the back seat of the car. Bill then handed Ally into Nathan, who settled his girl safely at his side as Faith got in the passenger seat. She planned on helping Nathan get Ally settled at home.
"Gabriel is already out at the house waiting to help," Bill told Nathan. "I will stop by later to check on you both," he added.
"Thank you, Bill," Nathan told his friend.
Lee had already gotten behind the wheel and as soon as Bill closed the door and took a step back from the car, Lee started the car. People parted to let the car pass and Lee made the short trip out to the Grant's home. A figure in red could be seen as they approached the house. As Lee brought the car to a stop, Gabriel moved to the Ally's side of the car.
"The princess has finally arrived home," Gabriel said cheerfully, as he opened the door and leaned inside.
"I don't feel much like a princess and I am definitely not going to look like one when the bandages are removed," Ally muttered.
Gabriel reached out and gently placed a hand against her cheek. "Hair grows back and you would look like a princess even if you were bald."
"I do not feel like testing that theory out," Ally replied.
Gabriel smiled at her response. "Let's get you inside," he told her, reaching in and lifting her carefully from the vehicle. Gabriel walked back around the car with Ally, and handed her off to Nathan who had gotten out of the car on the other side.
"Are you happy to be home?" Nathan asked her, as he settled her against him again.
"Yes," Ally replied. She glanced toward Lee. "Thank you for driving me home, Mr. Coulter."
Lee beamed at her. "It was my pleasure," he assured her. Looking to Nathan, he continued. "I will let you get settled in but know that if you need anything I am right down the row of houses. Day or night. I mean that."
"Thank you, Lee," Nathan replied.
Lee got back in the car and Nathan headed toward the house. Faith was at his side, and Gabriel was already at the front door, ready to hold it open for them.
Nathan started toward the house with his daughter cradled in his arms. He was glad he could bring her home. Just this act seemed to be a huge step toward life returning to normal.
"Are you happy to be home, Ally?" Nathan asked as he started toward the house with her.
"I think this is the closest to Christmas we have ever been without decorating," Ally commented as she rested her head on his shoulder again. "Even Fort Simpson got decorated for Christmas before this."
"Well, it is not quite Christmas yet, Ally," Nathan reminded her.
"I suppose so," Ally replied dully.
Nathan had a feeling that though she might like seeing the decorations that Ally was not feeling up to actually doing any of that decorating. It made him feel better about the surprise that he knew was waiting for her inside.
Stepping through the door that Gabriel held for him, Nathan stepped into his now decked out living room. Not only had the kids decorated the tree but the house as well.
"Welcome home, Ally!" the kids called out.
Robert, Cody, Opal, and Byrony were standing in a line near the tree. A decorated banner with the message was held by the first three, as Byrony would have been covered by the banner if she tried to hold it.
Ally gasped in surprise. Lifting her head from Nathan's shoulder, she looked around. "You made it feel like Christmas in here," Ally said, a smile coming to her face and a little sparkle to her eyes.
"We thought a decorated house would be nicer to come home to than an undecorated one," Robert supplied.
"Mountie Gabe helped us decorate," Opal added.
"Thank you," Ally told her friends.
Nathan moved over to the settee where Gabriel had placed extra pillows, and laid Ally down on it.
"My mom sent apple cider and Mrs. Thornton sent some cookies for us to celebrate you coming home," Cody supplied.
"That sounds really good," Ally replied. It was the most interest she had shown in food since her accident.
"I will go get it for you children," Faith replied, moving toward the kitchen. "Then when it is done, we need to let Ally get some rest."
"Yes, Dr. Carter," came the reply from the children before they all found seats on the floor near Ally.
Gabriel went to help Faith with the refreshments while Nathan retreated to the arm chair. Though he wanted Ally to have this time with her friends, he also planned on watching her like a hawk. If she seemed too tired, he would have no problem putting an end to the get together even before the time limit that Faith had set.