Disclaimer: I do NOT own Hakuouki or anything related to it.
"…I can't help seeing that you are very lonely, and sometimes there is a hungry look in your eyes that goes to my heart."
— Louisa May Alcott (Little Women)
Chizuru and Inoue exchanged a glance of shared frustration.
It really wasn't a surprise that Souji was refusing to rest like Hijikata ordered him to, or that Souji was being difficult at all. But they normally had better luck with him, managing to coax him with their concern for his well-being and the fact that Inoue was one of the few people Souji was humble around. Chizuru also liked to think that her keeping his secret played a part too. But today, they had no such luck. Souji was not hearing a word of their pleas and orders, and he knew full well that Kondou was unavailable to offer his own persuasion.
So the disguised girl and the older captain sat with their chins on their fists, trying to think of how to make Souji see reason. Occasionally their eyes met, ideas having sprung to their brains only to be dismissed with simultaneous headshakes as they realized that idea was bound to fail. Meanwhile, Souji was moving around the room like a mischevious child.
Chizuru sighed. Kondou was not available, Hijikata just barking more orders at Souji would be ineffective as usual, Yamazaki would have the same luck as Hijikata, Saito had been twice as busy lately so getting him to talk sense into Souji wasn't an option. And there was no point in even considering asking someone else for aid. It seemed Souji had won.
Right as Chizuru was about to give up, an idea clicked in her brain. She jumped a little in her seat, making Inoue and Souji shoot her curious looks though the latter shrugged it off and went back to ignoring them.
"You win this round, Okita-san," Chizuru said, standing. Inoue stood with a raised eyebrow. Chizuru winked at him, then returned her attention to Souji."Do whatever you prefer for now. Just know that I'll be informing a certain someone of today's events, which he specifically instructed me to do in such a situation."
Souji's eyebrows rose."Really, Chizuru-chan? Threatening to tell Hijikata-san on me?" He crossed his arms, unimpressed and amused."I can't believe I expected better from you."
Chizuru smiled sweetly."I wasn't referring to Hijikata-san." She felt a spark of sadistic glee."Do you remember the cat incident?" A pointless question. One would have to be suffering from terrible amnesia to forget a single detail of that day.
Souji's eyes narrowed. She could picture the gears turning in his skull, trying to figure out her plan. Inoue watched with equal curiosity.
Her smile widened."Well then, I'm sure you remember that Sanan-san pulled me aside and protected me so you couldn't involve me in your mess. He told me that if anyone ever tried to force me into one of their schemes again, I should tell them I was under strict orders from Hijikata-san." Souji narrowed his eyes further, knowing there was more to it than that. Chizuru crossed her arms, enjoying the incoming smugness."Sanan-san also said that if the mention of Hijikata-san was not enough to discourage the troublemaker, then I had his blessing to mention his name as well." She tapped her chin thoughtfully, pretending not to notice the way Souji whitened."If memory serves, Sanan-san personally handled your punishment for the cat incident and you walked with a limp for two days after some rather vigorous training." She adopted an innocent expression, waiting for Souji's decision and half-hoping she would get to make good on her threat.
Souji recovered swiftly, giving her a shaky smirk."Nice try, Chizuru-chan, but given the current circumstances-"
Inoue clasped his hands with enthusiasm and approval."Splendid idea, Yukimura-kun. I can easily deliver this message to Sanan-san and arrange for him and Souji to discuss this little problem."
Souji gawked at Inoue, whose smile was even sweeter than Chizuru's. Truly, Sanan would be proud of their attempts to mimic his mixture of pleasantness and unpleasantness.
Souji looked back and forth between them, mouth opening and closing. After swallowing nervously and pondering for a minute, he hurried to sit down and consume the meal they'd brought for him.
Chizuru and Inoue covered their mouths to hide their grins. Souji glared at them, impressed and annoyed at having to concede defeat.
After making sure Souji ate everything they brought and that he was actually resting, they left him alone.
Inoue patted her on the shoulder as they walked."Excellent job, Yukimura-kun. We should use that tactic more often."
"It won't get old?"
"Not even Souji is brave or foolish enough to take any chances with Sanan-san. No one knows that better than the man himself."
She giggled. That definitely sounded like Sanan. She could imagine him chuckling and smirking while his terrified subordinates shook and struggled to form excuses. Her amusement doubled at the knowledge that Souji easily counted among those unfortunate souls, although she couldn't deny that he often deserved it.
She bit her lip. She hadn't heard or seen anything related to Sanan since the note at her window last week. No one mentioned the Itou issue during the more private, secretive meetings; she was torn between relief and unease about that. It seemed everyone went out of their way to avoid the topic of Sanan and the Water of Life, and they certainly couldn't use the excuse of being careful with information around her anymore.
Chizuru looked around to ensure they were alone and there was no risk of being overheard. "Inoue-san?" She said hesitantly.
Inoue turned to her."Yes?"
She leaned in to whisper,"Do the others talk about Sanan-san much?"
Inoue frowned."You've noticed it too then." Looking ahead of them, he sighed."It is no different when you are not present; they avoid that topic like a plague, only mentioning it when absolutely necessary."
She would be lying if she claimed to be shocked by that. It was just a confirmation of what she already strongly suspected.
"Like the recent Itou problem," she murmured. He nodded with a grimace.
"Have you heard anything?" She asked. Inoue was among those sent to handle the meals and supplies for the Fury Corp. and the only one that didn't express negative thoughts about it. Chizuru had done that a few times after they moved to the temple, but soon received other duties and barely saw the Furies. And with Souma Kazue and Nomura Risaburo becoming her page protégés, she did not expect that to change.
Inoue shook his head."I have not seen him in awhile, no. That task has fallen on others lately." He pressed his lips into a thin line."The last time I saw him was a few weeks ago, just before Itou started experiencing...nightmares. He seemed...the usual."
Chizuru opened her mouth, closed it, and lowered her head. As she'd expected, and as she'd worried. His next words made her head snap to the side to look at him so quickly it was a wonder her neck didn't snap.
"It is possible I will be assigned to that task again soon." Inoue spoke smoothly, understanding in his eyes and the ghost of a smile teasing his lips. Her eyes widened and her cheeks flushed. After looking away for a moment, she glanced back at him with gratitude clear on her face and nodded.
Sanan had decided to bring the Fury that had shown hints of intelligence and rationality to a separate room, away from their more savage counterparts. He had been ready to give up on it, but it'd again reacted fiercely during one of his bloodlust attacks and grown quiet when the pain stopped, as if it sensed what was happening to Sanan despite being in a different room. He undid its chains and waited for something, only to be attacked again. But as he re-chained the creature, it lifted its gaze to meet his own and though he couldn't decipher any emotion in its eyes, the calmness in them was human.
A day after he gave Chizuru the note thanking her for her kindness and trust, he had hope for his research. A possible breakthrough. He did not let himself be giddy, however, lest he become more vexed if this turned out to be nothing. Still, it was a nice to have some hope, for however long it would last.
After the second incident, he arranged for the Fury to have its own room, still chained but receiving more observational visits for studying than the others. He spent almost half the night watching it, taking note of every movement that stood out. The creature kept its head down, but shifted whenever he entered the room. The first night was mostly growls and struggles, albeit not as fierce as in the past. Sanan placed some medicine within its reach, but it did not react. The medicine was still there when he came back later. The second night was the exact same, as was the third night. The fourth night was when things started to change. He left the medicine, and when he came back, it was gone. The Fury still would not look at him, but as he left, he could have sworn that he noticed from the corner of his eye that the Fury glaring at his back. The fifth night was when the Fury finally met his gaze, but still waited until he left to take the medicine. The entire time it glared at him, gaze never wavering. The sixth night was when the Fury did both, watching him like he watched it and taking the medicine in front of him. Sanan smiled and avidly recorded this in his notes.
Now here he was on the seventh night, eager to continue with this breakthrough. It seemed he would truly not be alone in maintaining his mind, after all.
Someone was supposed to come tonight to deliver fresh supplies for the Fury Corp. For once, Sanan was glad that most of his comrades disliked venturing to this section of headquarters, as it meant there would be no dillydallying with small talk that distracted or delayed his work. He was not about to waste precious time and energy that this potential lead required. Though it would be nice to have someone to share his enthusiasm with, if only to brag.
Alright, maybe it was too soon to brag, but this week was more productive than any other period of time had been for awhile.
That was why it was a pleasant surprise to see who had been assigned to bring the supplies this time.
"Inoue-san." Sanan's eyes widened briefly before he nodded at the older man and let him in, taking some of the supplies from his hands. Inoue hadn't been assigned this task since a few weeks ago, shortly before the Itou problem began forming.
"Sanan-san." Inoue smiled as he followed him to his room."You seem to be in a good mood."
"I am," he admitted softly. He hesitated, glancing over his shoulder to check Inoue's expression. Inoue was always polite and friendly to everyone, and had never expressed a solid opinion on the Water of Life and the Furies, so it was impossible for Sanan, despite his skill at reading people, to tell if this was a courtesy question or true curiosity.
"I might have reached a breakthrough in my research," Sanan confessed."Time will tell if it is truly signficant, but I am hopeful."
Inoue's smile grew."That's good to hear. I'm sure Isami-san and Toshi-san will be happy to know that as well."
Sanan shrugged. Almost everyone seemed content to ignore the Fury Corp.'s existence, and the few who tried to be more open-minded changed their minds and fled at the last minute, like Heisuke had done recently. Souji and Chizuru might be interested, if only for the sake of making sure he was well in the latter's case. Souji might be a mix of both concern for him and interest in the serum.
Sanan hesitated."Is Yukimura-kun well?" He hadn't dared go out on any walks after the Itou problem was taken care of, reluctant to simply step outside for a minute of fresh air. He had no idea how Chizuru was doing since Yamazaki finished helping him and providing updates and had returned to his normal duties.
Inoue's smile was a knowing one."As well as can be expected," he said pleasantly."She has had more work to do recently, nothing that she can't handle, of course, and not that she is complaining. Souma Kazue and Nomura Risaburo have become pages for Isami-san, and Yukimura-kun is in charge of training them. She seems to enjoy it, and they are quite enthusiastic to learn as much as possible from their new Senpai. And since she has actually been allowed to act as Hijikata's page, she has plenty to teach."
"I am certain they will benefit greatly from learning the art of tea-making," Sanan said dryly.
Inoue chuckled."You joke, but that will indeed be a very valuable life lesson."
"Who said I was joking?" Sanan asked, half-humorously.
He remembered his own beginnings as an instructor back at the dojo. A learning experience for both himself and his students. He was glad that Chizuru would get to experience that for herself. The boys were lucky to have someone so bright, kind, and optimistic guide them into properly serving the Shinsengumi.
Then something hit him. One of those names rang a bell."You said Souma Kazue has joined our ranks?" The same Souma Kazue that carried a painting of Serizawa in Fury form given to him by Ibuki? He did not expect to hear or see anything of him after the matter was resolved and he was let go.
Inoue nodded."Along with Nomura Risaburo, yes." Then he frowned."No one told you? Surely Toshi-san and Isami-san would have-"
"I do not get much news here," Sanan said icily, shrugging in partially feigned nonchalance. He'd already talked about this with Chizuru and wasn't in the mood to be reminded that his existence was a popularly ignored topic."The last update I received was a week ago, from Yamazaki-kun about Itou-san's nightmares." He looked straight ahead as he walked, his good mood fading.
"I see." Inoue spoke quietly."That's very unfortunate." There was a hint of displeasure in his voice.
Sanan gave another shrug without looking back."Kondou-san and Hijikata-kun are busy men." He smiled sadly as he recalled Chizuru saying something similar while trying to comfort him after he admitted the same thing to her.
"Hmm." Inoue pressed his lips into a thin line."And they are especially busy at the most convenient times, it seems." The displeasure was far more noticeable now. Sanan opted to ignore it. Nothing would come of this, and his eagerness to return to studying the intelligent Fury was all that kept his good mood from completely dropping. It was no insult to Inoue, of course, but simply how things were and perhaps how they should be.
Inoue finished helping him with the supplies in silence. Once that was done, he smiled kindly at Sanan and reached into his pocket."Before I go, there is one more thing I was asked to give you." He retrieved a folded piece of paper and handed it to Sanan, ignoring his confused expression.
"Good luck with your work, Sanan-san." Inoue patted his shoulder and turned to leave. Sanan watched him with a raised eyebrow. Once he heard the door open and close as Inoue left, he examined the note. Inoue claimed he was asked to deliver this to him, so he obviously hadn't written it and surely he would have simply told Sanan if he wanted to let him know anything. Could it be an update from Yamazaki that he was too busy to do himself or just gave it to Inoue since he knew the older man was already coming here? Maybe a well-intended but ultimately meaningless apology note from Heisuke? Certainly possible.
Sighing, Sanan shook his head. He didn't need more reminders of what an unpleasant necessity he was viewed as by his comrades. So he decided to dispose of the note without reading it.
That was until another possibility popped up in his brain. Could it be from Chizuru? A response to his own note to her from the previous week? Sanan hesitated for a second, then shook his head and unfolded the paper a little faster than necessary.
A slow but wide and genuine smile graced his face when he saw the familiar handwriting, and his heart swelled when he read the words.
I will always trust you.
"Let us hope you do not regret that, my dear," he whispered.
His left hand tingled at the memory of her touch. All the negative feelings left him, his eagerness to return to his research matching his hope for the new development. He placed the note in his journal, promising to write a new entry once he finished tonight's studies.
His smile vanished as he walked to the room where the Fury was kept, but his positive feelings remained strong as ever.
This time, the Fury was already watching the door as if awaiting his arrival. It kept its calm gaze on him despite its slight physical struggles. Sanan placed the medicine in front of it again, hoping for a repeat of last night. Regardless, the fact that it seemingly had been expecting him by now was progress.
The Fury kept staring at him. In the previous staring sessions, it had done so without blinking, but now it did blink. He wrote that down, trying not to rush in his excitement over the growing potential success of this lead. The Fury directed its gaze to his notebook, following the movement of his hand and pen. Sanan stopped writing, and its gaze stayed glued to the pen. Sanan leaned down to make eye contact, and its eyes flickered upwards to meet his own for a second afore returning to his writing utensil. Sanan restarted writing and its eyes followed each motion, stopping when the pen stopped and glancing up at him briefly whenever he tried to make it look at him. The more he did this, the more he could have sworn that he detected an increasing glint of annoyance in its eyes. Sanan moved backward, just in case its apparent annoyance eventually drove it to try to attack. The Fury blinked, then narrowed its eyes, realizing he'd moved. It kept observing his hand and pen, though. Did it really understand what he was doing?
Sanan ceased writing and held up his pen, moving it around in the air. The Fury's eyes did not follow the movement, yet they did narrow in understanding of what he was trying to do. The nonsense act was ignored by the creature, who cared only for the notebook. Sanan put down the pen and moved the notebook around the same way he'd done with the pen. The Fury gave the same reaction to that action.
"You do understand then," Sanan murmured. The Fury either didn't hear him speak or ignored the words. He placed both items down, receiving a brief glare. Sanan retrieved the items and began quickly writing, both from his eagerness to get all of this down and to see how good the Fury was at following his movements. Its eyes didn't move quite fast enough, yet the creature was clearly trying.
A half-grunt, half-growl escaped its throat. Sanan's head snapped up to fully look at it, and his hand instinctively moved closer to his sword. He wasn't close enough for it to actually touch him if it attacked, but one could never be too careful.
The Fury made no move to attack, or any move at all for that matter. Nothing about its facial expression or body language indicated a threat, merely irritation.
Sanan took a gander at the medicine, hoping the Fury would take it while he was watching like it did last time. No such luck. It hardly mattered, though, with all the other things it had done.
Accepting this was all he would be getting out of it tonight, (other than the medicine being gone when he returned, of course), he sighed and closed the book and stood to leave. Right as he was about to open the shoji, however...
"T-Took...l-long..."
He froze, almost dropping his supplies. He spun around on his heel, gaping at the Fury. Had he imagined it, or had the Fury actually spoken? Its lips were parted and it was swallowing profusely, which made sense given how hoarse and quiet the voice sounded.
He wasn't imagining it.
Sanan took slow, careful steps toward the Fury and knelt in front of it. He inclined his head, realizing what it'd been trying to say.
"What took me so long?" He asked slowly. The Fury nodded curtly, actually nodded!
"You were waiting for me earlier," he whispered. Another curt nod from the Fury!
"You can tell time then," he said, rubbing his chin thoughtfully.
The Fury tried to speak again, but only a choked grunt came out, so it settled for a nod.
Sanan sat there in silence for several minutes, head swirling with so many thoughts that he almost didn't notice the Fury reaching for the medicine. Their gazes met as the Fury slowly and clumsily unwrapped the packet and stuck the medicine into its - no, his - mouth.
For the first time, Sanan no longer felt so alone among his fellow furies.
After completing their patrol for the day, Heisuke accompanied Chizuru in checking on Souji.
Partially, it was because he wanted to spend more time with Chizuru to make sure she was alright after the Itou problem. The other part was a feeling that she would need his help in getting Souji to cooperate.
So he was pleasantly surprised to see Souji fully cooperating. He was also amused by the smallest hints of nervousness on Souji's face and in his voice as he greeted Chizuru. For her part, Chizuru was wearing the ghost of a smile that reminded him of...Sanan. So much so that he wondered if they'd switched bodies.
Despite his uneasiness about Sanan's possible involvement, Heisuke grinned and raised his eyebrows at Souji."Who are you and what have you done with Souji?"
Chizuru giggled. She sat beside Souji and started pouring him tea and making sure everything was properly arranged on the tray.
Souji scoffed and crossed his arms. Chizuru giggled again, making him pout and point at her."Chizuru-chan is an evil genius." His eyes narrowed."Don't let that adorable face fool you!"
Chizuru looked away to hide her blushing cheeks, though her laughter didn't cease. She waited a moment to collect herself before giving Souji the tray with a stern countenance. Heisuke chuckled despite himself. If she really was the evil genius Souji claimed she was, then maybe seeing that adorable face would be more than worth the suffering...
Wait, what? Heisuke's eyes were now the size of saucers and his face turned crimson. Had he really just thought that? Clearly, the wrong brain had taken over for a moment.
"Heisuke-kun?" Chizuru touched his arm, frowning in concern."Are you alright?"
Heisuke blinked twice, then nodded rapidly."Ah, yeah, I'm fine, just got lost in thought for a second there." He grinned sheepishly.
Her frown didn't falter."You were red." She put her palm to his forehead and pressed her lips together into a thin line."Hmm, you don't have a fever. Don't strain yourself for the rest of the day, just in case, okay?" She smiled kindly, looking, well, adorable.
Heisuke dipped his head in a clumsy nod. Chizuru patted his arm and turned back to Souji. Her touch had almost made him blush harder than earlier.
The shoji suddenly slid open and Inoue poked his head in. He smiled in amusement and satisfaction when he saw Souji was complying. He gave Heisuke a nod, but was mostly focused on Chizuru.
"Yukimura-kun, can you help me with something?" Inoue asked. He appeared pleasant enough, but there was the slightest bit of ire in his eyes. Not directed at them, though. Heisuke wondered what and who made Inoue angry, then it hit him. Inoue was the one to deliver supplies to the Fury Corp. last night...
Chizuru and Souji seemed to be thinking the same thing, the latter grimacing while the former quickly stood up and hurried outside. Inoue stepped aside to let her pass and gave a polite wave to Heisuke and Souji before closing the shoji.
"Well, they're dead," Souji said wryly."Kondou-san will be mostly alright, but Hijikata-san may have to take the Water of Life after Gen-san is through with them."
Heisuke scowled."That's not funny!"
"What's not funny?" A new voice enquired. Hesiuke turned to see Harada, Shinpachi, and Saito standing in the doorway. Without waiting for an answer, the three entered the room. Saito took a seat next to Souji whilst Shinpachi and Harada sat on either side of Heisuke.
Shinpachi pointed his thumb over his shoulder."Does it have anything to do with how angry Gen-san looked?"
"Last night was his turn, correct?" Saito guessed. Heisuke and Souji nodded. Saito sighed."The Chief and Commander will be getting an earful."
"The rest of us won't be off the hook," Harada said, rubbing the back of his neck."Even if we don't get it as bad as those two."
Souji snorted as he put down his teacup."Speak for yourselves. I have an excuse." A genuine cough escaped him, and he smirked as he gestured to the air as if say,"See?"
"It has not stopped you from jumping and running all over the place while Commander Hijikata yells at you," Saito stated, pouring a fresh cup of tea for Souji and handing it to him."And based on your out of character good behavior, I assume that he has already found a way to frighten you for the time being." A statement, not a question.
Souji huffed."It was mostly Chizuru-chan." At everyone except for Heisuke's surprised and curious expressions, he said,"You remember the cat incident?" They all nodded."And how Sanan-san rescued her and protected her from being dragged back into helping us?"
Heisuke shuddered. He had sent Sanan and Chizuru desperate looks, beggng them not to abandon him. Chizuru hesitated, but Sanan tightly gripped her shoulder as he ushered her out of the room, the door closing behind them mere seconds before Hijikata exploded into yelling. At the very least, he didn't have to endure an extra punishment at Sanan's hands like Souji. At the end of the day, Hijikata was stuck with a lost voice for a little while and Sanan and Chizuru showed up at the meeting room with the cat. Sanan explained that it came into his quarters a few minutes prior, yet Chizuru's refusal to look at anyone confirmed that they'd found the cat long ago. Afterwards, Sannan grabbed Souji by the ear and dragged him away. The cat refused to leave Chizuru's arms until the next morning when she and Sanan ensured it was properly fed and clean before giving it to the owner of their then-headquarters' child, who'd told Saito that he liked playing with it often. Souji suffered from a limp for two days due to the vigorous training Sanan subjected him to as punishment.
"Well," Souji continued,"Sanan-san gave her his blessing to mention his name if someone ever tried to cause trouble for her. Gen-san backed her up. I wasn't gonna take my chances. You'd have to be an idiot to risk his wrath."
Saito chuckled, earning a glare from Souji. Heisuke and Shinpachi burst out laughing. Harada snickered into his fist. Scowling, Souji gulped down his tea a bit too quickly and thus choked. Saito slapped him on the back, and he spat out the liquid, waving off Saito's worries.
Once he recovered, Souji pointed at Heisuke."What was that look on your face earlier about?
Heisuke paled. Of course Souji noticed that! Harada, Shinpachi, and Saito snapped their attention to him so quickly it was a wonder their necks didn't snap.
Heisuke bit his lip."W-What are you-" He knew before he spoke that his attempts at denial were doomed to fail.
Souji scoffed."You're a worse liar than Chizuru-chan." He smirked, eyebrows shooting up."Blood flow to the wrong brain for second back there?"
Heisuke almost fell onto his back in shock and humilation. Shinpachi loudly choked on his own breath; Saito coughed lightly; Harada stiffened and looked away. Souji shook with the force of his cackling.
Heisuke hugged his knees to his chest and hid his face. Eventually, someone cleared his throat.
"Alright, that's enough," Harada said sternly."Lay off him." He patted Heisuke comfortingly on the shoulder.
Souji rolled his eyes."Don't think nobody's noticed you acting the same way around her."
Harada bit his lip to stifle a response. Taking hold of Heisuke's arm, he forced him to stand up and beckoned Shinpachi."Let's go listen in on Gen-san lecturing them." He waved an arm to the door.
"Please let us know what you hear," Saito said, then midly glared at Souji."Souji, your food and tea will get cold if you keep laughing to distract yourself." When Souji ignored him in favor of continuing to laugh at Heisuke and Harada, he picked up a piece of food and shoved it into Souji's mouth, shutting him up.
"You deserved that one," Harada said dryly.
Heisuke almost ran from the room alongside his two best friends. Shinpachi walked ahead of them, just out of earshot.
"Just ignore him," Harada whispered, lightly tapping the back of his head. Heisuke gave a small grateful smile to his friend and nodded. They caught up with Shinpachi and the three of them walked along in silence.