-Chapter 44-
-Rachel pov-
The hall is full of applause by our fellow students. I think we all are kind of thrown back by it. Blaine and Kurt seem to be the only two functioning. I mean they even have a bunch of cake for the whole school!
They are celebrating this hardcore. Is this what is feels to be appreciated? How it feels to have talent respected? To be around like minded people?
I love the feeling I have right now! I could almost become a teacher for the next generation. But that ones after my 5th Tony award and if I have met my middle requirement of plays I have done. After that I will be perfectly fine with doing something like teaching.
"I want to be a teacher" I turn toward Quinn smiling happily at a group of kids playing with Brittany and Angel "I want to be able to bring a smile to their faces"
"Well you can raise the next generation and Fran can come to Broadway with me" I smile but frown when I see Quinn look away quickly with a frown "Quinn?"
"Fran does not want to do Broadway" I tilt my head confused "She actually wants to work in a museum as a manager or owner"
"S-since when?" Quinn does not respond and I can feel irritation building "Why did she not tell me?"
Quinn sighs and looks at me "Cause she was afraid of how you would react" I look at her irritated and confused "She is afraid of that! That you will get irritated with her! You always do it Rachel!"
"Well if I am so irritating why stay? Why not leave?" Quinn goes silent and looks down "You have thought about it? What made you stay? The suicide attempt? You think I am that fragile?"
"Rachel we do not want to hurt you" I push her away as she tries to hug me "Rach"
"No" I step back "It's ok for you to be upset but not me right? I can not have feelings cause the ice queen demands it!"
"Hey that is uncalled for!" I scoff as Fran comes over "Apologize!"
"This is all this will ever be! You two taking the same side! I will never get one of you on my side!" They both frown and I can feel tears forming "You two are nothing but a sham! You pretend to love me but you really just feel sorry! Sorry that I am the loser that has a crush! Sorry that I am the loser that needed your pity! I love you two but do you truly love me? Or do you two love the idea of being with someone who makes it normal?"
"Rac~"
"Answer the question!" They both share a look and I scoff "No more...we are no more ok? Let me save the two of you the hassle of leaving me"
"Rachel wait!" I push Fran to the ground and slip off my crutch to the ground "Rach are you ok?"
"Fuck you" I push myself up and glare at them "Until you can figure your shit out do not talk to me"
I move away from them and go to have fun. Why is it everything how's bad for me? Why can I not find true love? Why does no one truly want me?
What is so wrong with Rachel Barbara Berry?
-Fran pov-
"Why do I feel like I stuck up for the wrong side there Quinn?" I look at my sister who will not meet my eyes "Answer me Quinn"
"She just got irritated over you not wanting Broadway and instead wanting to work at a museum" I turn as Santana walks over with a scowl "That bitch hurt my sister and I am going to break her fucking head in!"
"No Santana you could get expelled" Mercedes glares toward Quinn "Let me break this bitch"
"Hey let's talk it out instead!" Quinn clinches her fists as tears fall "She needed this! She needed to see that I am not perfect! She thinks we will never fight or disagree! So if her breaking up is how she responds then good riddance!"
-Rachel singing-
If I could turn back time
If I could find a way
I'd take back those words that've hurt you
And you'd stay
I don't know why I did the things I did
I don't know why I said the things I said
Pride's like a knife it can cut deep inside
Words are like weapons they wound sometimes
I didn't really mean to hurt you
I didn't wanna see you go
I know I made you cry, but baby
If I could turn back time
If I could find a way
I'd take back those words that've hurt you
And you'd stay
If I could reach the stars
I'd give them all to you
Then you'd love me, love me
Like you used to do
If I could turn back time
My world was shattered I was torn apart
Like someone took a knife and drove it deep in my heart
You walked out that door I swore that I didn't care
But I lost everything darling then and there
Too strong to tell you I was sorry
Too proud to tell you I was wrong
I know that I was blind, and darling
If I could turn back time
If I could find a way
I'd take back those words that've hurt you
And you'd stay
If I could reach the stars
I'd give them all to you
Then you'd love me, love me
Like you used to do
Oh
If I could turn back time
If I could turn back time
If I could turn back time
Oh baby
I didn't really mean to hurt you
I didn't want to see you go
I know I made you cry, but oh
If I could turn back time
If I could find a way
I'd take back those words that've hurt you
If I could reach the stars
I'd give them all to you
Then you'd love me, love me
Like you used to do
If I could turn back time (Turn back time)
If I could find a way (Find a way)
Then maybe, maybe, maybe
You'd stay
Reach the stars
If I could reach the stars
"You fucked up Quinn" My sister sighs and deflates immensely "You may have had a good heart or thought process but this was not right! Now I have to make sure she does not fall apart again"
"Fix this" Mercedes cracks her knuckles and we cringe backwards "Good"
"If you cost us our girl I will kill you" Quinn sniffles and I put my arm around her "We have to figure out how to get her back before someone try's to steal her"
"I could help" We look up as Dani walks over "I could help you try and figure out what she expects"
"It would help" I sigh and wipe Quinn's tears "Thank you Dani"
She nods and we start going over what she knows already. She knows stuff about Rachel we had no idea about. I had no idea she wants a pet gerbil. I thought she was scared of those things.
We really do not know her much at all. This time away will be for reflection for sure. We really need to look deep inside ourselves. We need to figure out what we need to do to be ourselves and let Rachel in.
We really need to figure out if Rachel is who we truly want.