Thanks again for the review Love. Fiction. 2020!
Disclaimer: I own nothing!
"Good news, Amaya." Hennix said as he sat down at the table for lunch. "You're going to get to visit another planet."
"What? Why?" Amaya asked, looking around at the other padawans, who seemed just as perplexed as she was.
"Master Luke wants to see us all after lunch." Hennix explained. "He says we're going to the Senate. Something's happened but he wouldn't say what."
"The Senate?" Voe asked, putting down her fork. "This is serious. Ben, do you know what this is about?"
Ben shook his head. "Why would I?" He asked, rather tersely, and Voe sighed, turning back to Hennix.
"He didn't give any more information than that?" Voe asked Hennix, who shook his head as well.
Amaya looked across the table at Ben, watching his face carefully. Feeling her gaze, he looked up to meet her eyes.
What? He asked silently, a flicker of annoyance coming across through his thoughts.
You really don't know what this is about? Amaya asked, prompting Ben to narrow his eyes at her.
Of course not. You think my mother tells me things? He replied irritably.
Well she is your mother-
She doesn't trust me enough to tell me anything. Ben said, cutting her off mid-thought.
Amaya frowned, refocusing her attention on his face. Ben looked away, focusing his attention on his lunch, and Amaya took the hint and did the same.
Amaya could feel the anticipation building in herself and the padawans around her as the lunch dragged on. When they finally left to go meet Luke, the Force was practically humming with it.
The padawans stopped outside Luke's office and Voe stepped forward, knocking on the door. A moment passed in silence before Luke opened the door and nodded curtly, gesturing from them to come in. The Jedi Master retreated behind his cluttered desk, visibly stressed, as the padawans filed into the small room.
"Close the door." Luke said, without looking up from the hologram device he was holding.
Amaya turned to close the door and when she looked back, a holographic image of Leia Organa was being displayed from the hologram device Luke had placed on his desk.
"There's been another attack on the New Republic outpost on Carosi XII." Leia's image began, her eyes creased with the same worry that seemed to plague Luke. "This time, New Republic forces were able to apprehend one of the attackers and bring him in for questioning. Under interrogation, he admitted to having been working for one of the Imperial holdouts in the Outer Rim. This news is, albeit concerning, not unexpected. However, that is not all he revealed. According to his story, the Imperial sympathizers in the Outer Rim have been regrouping, forging new alliances between previously divergent factions, and have managed to form an entirely new organization with similar aspirations to those of the Empire. They call themselves the First Order. Our prisoner didn't know who the leader was but he mentioned he saw Dark Side Force users that I believe may have been the Knights of Ren. If the Knights of Ren are truly involved, this makes it likely that Snoke is the mysterious leader who remains, as yet, anonymous. I haven't told Ben yet, but I-"
Luke quickly stopped the recording and Leia's image disappeared abruptly. Amaya resisted the urge to glance over at Ben, not wanting to give Luke any indication that she knew anything she shouldn't.
"Senator Organa wants us at the Senate by mid-day tomorrow. The whole situation is still being kept a secret from the Senate at large. Only Senator Organa and a few trusted colleagues know of this. She wants to be clear on what exactly it is we're dealing with before revealing anything to the public. The prisoner could have been mistaken, or lying. There's no hard evidence the Knights of Ren are involved and we don't know who is leading this new "First Order"...or even if it really exists."
Luke sighed, looking tired. "That's where you come in." He said, looking around the room. "We need you to find out what is going on and come back to Senator Organa with some concrete information she can use in the Senate."
Amaya blinked, realizing Luke had included her in this mission. Was she really ready for this? Her lightsaber skills were still far below her peers but her other abilities were nearly on par. Was that enough?
"How are we supposed to find out who's behind this?" Voe asked, her eagerness coming through in her voice.
"Senator Organa will explain everything once we reach the Senate tomorrow." Luke replied dismissively. "The situation is likely evolving as we speak. You should pack with the understanding that we might be away for a while."
"How old?" Voe asked, but Luke only shook his head.
"I have no idea." He said. "Now I've kept you long enough from your training. I'll see you later."
Luke gestured towards the door, indicating that he wanted them to leave. Amaya opened the door, leading the others out into the hall. A sort of shocked silence fell over the group for a moment as they walked towards the library.
Do you know what's going on? Amaya asked Ben as they walked, feeling the anxiety the question caused him through the Force.
Can we talk about this later. Ben pleaded. I'll tell you everything. I promise.
Amaya resisted the urge to look at him, trying to keep her face expressionless. So you know what this First Order is?
Later. Ben replied. Please.
How long have you known about this? Amaya asked, the severity of the situation dawning on her. This First Order wanted to overthrow the New Republic and bring back something akin to the Empire. Snoke, likely the most powerful Force user she had ever encountered, was likely in charge of it and he was trying to recruit Ben to his side. Ben knew about this and hadn't said anything. Not even to her.
Suddenly, Amaya felt sick to her stomach.
I didn't think you needed this extra burden. Ben said, and Amaya felt her temper flare.
This changes things, Ben! This isn't just a matter of our own safety - this is a matter of importance to the galaxy as a whole! Amaya cried silently, hoping her face didn't betray the emotions she felt.
Even if I had told you. What would you have done? Ben retorted and Amaya glared at him as they took their seats across the table from one another. Tai, Voe and Hennix began speaking about the assigned readings but Amaya blocked them out, her eyes fixed on Ben instead.
I would have found a way to warn Master Luke. Amaya replied. I don't know how, but I would have found a way.
The First Order hasn't been a threat until now. They've been too small. Ben replied defensively.
And thanks to you now they've had a chance to grow. Amaya said savagely. Whose side are you on, anyway?
Amaya felt her words cut him through the Force and looked down, glaring at the table in front of her.
"What do you think, Amaya?" Hennix asked, pulling Amaya back to the real world.
"Oh I um-" Amaya stuttered.
"Are you okay? You seem distracted." Hennix said, looking concerned.
Amaya shook her head, letting out a sigh. "No, I'm fine. I'm just...tired."
"You know what?" Tai said, letting out a sigh of his own. "I say we put this on hold and go prepare for tomorrow. There's no point pretending as if everything is normal when we know it's not. We're ready for this mission. What we need now is some rest."
"I agree." Hennix said, shaking his head. "After tomorrow, who knows how long it will be before we get a day off."
"Then it's settled." Tai said, picking up the Jedi text and standing up. "I'm going to go pack."
Amaya looked over at Ben as he stood up but he refused to meet her eyes, choosing instead to turn away and quickly leave the room. Amaya followed the others out, waiting until they all disappeared into their own rooms before doubling back to knock on Ben's door.
"We need to talk." She said, as soon as he opened his door.
Ben sighed, stepping back to let her in. "I think you made your point quite clear back in the library." He said.
Amaya shook her head, rubbing her hands across her face. Not even sure where to start. "This can't go on forever." Amaya said at last. "How long can we live this double life? Every second we don't tell Master Luke about Snoke is another second we are betraying him and the Jedi Order and now, it turns out, the entire New Republic. I don't want my brother to die but is protecting him really worth it? He made the choice to serve Snoke. He's the enemy. Why am I betraying everyone else for his sake? I'm not even sure I don't hate him!"
"Okay, calm down." Ben said, placing his hands on her shoulders. "First of all, you're not betraying anyone by keeping this secret. You're not going to turn to the Dark Side and Snoke is not telling you any information that would be useful to Master Luke or my mother. Telling Master Luke about this would accomplish nothing except get you expelled."
"What about you?" Amaya snapped, shaking his hands off her shoulders. "What other information has Snoke told you about the First Order? How much more are you hiding?"
"Nothing." Ben replied sharply. "I give you permission to search my mind if you don't believe me. All I knew before today was that the First Order existed. Nothing else."
Amaya shook her head, beginning to pace. "We are going to end up in a war against the First Order. I can sense it. The Force is practically humming with it. It's like everything is building towards something. I felt this on Alfazine before the war. I know this feeling, Ben. I can't ignore it."
"If there's war then so be it." Ben said, and Amaya stopped to face him. "We will get through this together. We have each other. That's more than we've ever had before."
Amaya felt her heart melt at his words and felt the Darkness that had been rising inside her dissipate somewhat. All too soon, the comfort his words had brought was followed by a dark thought that sent shivers down her spine and left her insides feeling cold. What if she lost him? What if he died in the war? What if he left?
I'm not going anywhere. Ben said silently, sensing her feelings.
Before Amaya could think twice about it, she crossed the room and hugged him. She felt his shock through the Force dissolve into affection as he wrapped his arms around her and rested his chin on her shoulder.
The ship rattled and shook as it took off from the Temple's island, causing some of the luggage to fall off the shelf and onto Ben's lap. He shoved it off of himself, pushing it into the corner of the cockpit.
"Don't just leave it on the ground!" Voe complained, grabbing the bag and shoving it into one of the nearby compartments before closing it again.
Ben ignored her, looking out the window of the ship instead.
It's not your fault your mother doesn't trust you. Snoke said, sensing his thoughts. She's believed you were meant for the Dark since before you were even born. I have seen into her mind. She sensed the Darkness in you in her womb and it terrified her.
How could there be Darkness in me in the womb? Ben asked. I wasn't even a child yet.
My boy, the Dark and the Light find you. You do not find them. They seek out those who are like them in their nature. The Force knows who you are better than you know yourself.
You're saying my nature is Dark? Ben asked, a mess of conflicting emotions arising in him as he contemplated this possibility.
Ask the Force. Not me. Snoke replied. Listen to it. It will show you who you are meant to be.
Ben frowned, unsatisfied with the answer, but he could already feel Snoke slipping away. He jumped when he felt a hand on his shoulder and looked up to see Amaya.
"You okay?" She asked, a look of concern on her face that made him want to hug her.
"Yea." He said, "Look we're almost there."
Ben gestured out the window as Hosnian Prime came into view. He smiled as Amaya's entire face lit up as she took in the view.
"Everyone take your seats for landing!" Luke called from the pilot's seat and Amaya came around the back of Ben's seat to take the seat next to him.
Once they were inside the atmosphere, the metropolitan sprawl of Hosnian Prime stretched out below them and Ben found himself looking for familiar landmarks. If you looked closely, he thought to himself, you could see that his mother had had her mark on almost every aspect of this planet. To say she was influential would be an understatement.
The ship touched down outside the Senate and Ben looked up at the majestic building, feeling resentment fester inside him. As a child, when the New Republic Senate had been stationed on Chandrila, he'd associated the Senate with long, boring speeches he'd been forced to sit through in absolute silence. It had been the place his mother went to all day, only to come home too exhausted to do anything but go to bed. Politics had always been Leia Organa's first love and her first priority. No amount of complaining from Ben or Han could ever drag her away from it. Even before she'd sent him away, it had seemed to Ben that sometimes she forgot she had a son.
"Luke." Leia Organa said, her face lighting up in a smile as she walked out to meet them. She hugged her brother, welcoming him, before turning to the padawans behind him.
"Thank you all for coming. Please allow the droids to handle your luggage." Leia said, as droids whizzed past her towards the ship to collect the luggage. "We have rooms made up for you upstairs. You'll be shown to them later. Unfortunately, right now we're going to have to go straight to a meeting. Given the urgency of the situation, we can't afford to waste any time."
"Then let's get going." Luke agreed.
Luke and Leia began walking towards the entrance of the building, chatting quietly between themselves, and Ben felt a shard of ice pierce his heart. She hadn't even acknowledged him. She'd treated him like just another Jedi padawan. She'd hugged her brother but she'd completely ignored her own son.
What's wrong? Amaya asked silently, coming up next to him.
Ben cursed the Force for having revealed to her his feelings. Nothing. He ground back.
Clearly unconvinced, Amaya bit her lip but remained silent as they entered the Senate and made their way towards a private room on the upper levels. Entering the room, the padawans filed into seats around a large round table. Already seated at the table were three Senators, all of which greeted the padawans as they sat down.
"On behalf of the Senate, I'd like to extend a heartfelt thank you for joining us today. I apologize for the short notice and appreciate how accommodating you have been." A rather plump Senator said, once everyone had been seated. "As I'm sure Senator Organa has informed you all, the New Republic may be facing a threat more severe than any since the Empire itself. From what little intelligence we have been able to gather, the First Order is an organized authoritarian government backed by a growing military power base. We are still unsure who is leading it, how widespread it has become, where it is based, and whether it is affiliated with the criminal organization of Force wielders known as the Knights of Ren."
In the center of the table, a series of holographic images began to play out as the Senator spoke. Ben felt Amaya tense beside him as images of the Knights of Ren flitted by one after the other and her brother appeared in front of them briefly before being replaced with another Knight.
"We have reason to believe there is a First Order base on Atterra Bravo that is less heavily guarded than the other more prominent ones on Kashyyyk and Dantooine." Another Senator continued. In front of her, a holographic image of Atterra Bravo appeared. The image zoomed into the planet, focusing in on a fortress built on a high hill, surrounded by deep caverns.
"The problem is the fortress is difficult to scale. Only a Jedi or a highly skilled warrior would be able to penetrate the fortress's defenses undetected."
The holographic image shifted, rotating to show a 360 degree view of the fortress. The Senator continued, explaining where the fortress's weak spots were, where the guards were located, where traps were set, and where alarms would be triggered. Ben found himself forgetting everything else as he listened to the Senator speak and analyzed the fortress. It had been so long since they'd had a mission this interesting. Finally he was being given the opportunity to show what he could do.
"I'm sorry to interrupt." Leia said at last, checking her watch. "But the Senate is going to convene in 5 minutes to discuss the trade dispute on Ryloth. You will all have time to review this again after dinner tonight."
The Senators stood up, thanking the padawans for their time, before filing out of the room. Only Leia remained behind. She exchanged a look with Luke, who nodded, before turning to look back at the padawans.
"Come, I'll show you where we're going to be staying for the next while." Luke said, gesturing for the padawans to follow him.
Ben moved to get up when his mother spoke, holding out a hand. "Ben, please stay. I want to talk to you about something."
Ben frowned in confusion but sat back down, watching the others file out. Once the padawans and Luke were gone, Leia closed the door behind them before coming over to sit on the chair next to him.
"We didn't even get a chance to properly say hi." Leia said, and Ben bit back the retort he wanted desperately to throw back at her. She had ignored him up until this moment. Chance had nothing to do with it.
"How are you?" Leia continued, putting a hand on his arm. "Last I saw you, you were bedridden from that explosion."
"That was a long time ago." Ben said, resisting the urge to shake her hand off of him.
"Did you get my letter?" Leia asked, sensing his discomfort and removing her hand anyway.
"Yes." Ben replied, "I forgot to respond." It was a lie.
Leia's face fell and Ben felt a twinge of guilt. However, the guilt was soon replaced by resentment as he remembered all the times he'd tried to contact his mother and she had "forgotten" to respond.
"I wanted to talk to you about this mission." Leia said at last, and Ben fought to keep his face from showing the irritation he felt. Of course this was about the mission. She wouldn't have taken time out of her busy schedule just to sit and talk. Her inquiries about his wellbeing had been nothing more than mere formalities.
"As you know, there is a great likelihood Snoke is the anonymous leader of the First Order. We are unable to locate him or any of the Knights of Ren. This fortress is likely just a base filled with stormtroopers and droids but...we don't know that for sure."
Ben made no comment, waiting for her to continue. She seemed to be hesitant to say something and this made Ben highly suspicious. His mother was never unsure about anything and she was certainly not one to mince words.
"If there's even a chance Snoke could get his hands on you...I don't want to take it." Leia said, and Ben felt his stomach turn inside out. "You're not going on this mission. It's too dangerous. If he finds you-"
"You're not serious." Ben interrupted, his shock quickly turning into fury. "You can't be serious."
"I'm dead serious." Leia replied. "I'm not going to send you into his grasp willingly. I'm not going to give him such an easy opportunity-"
"You think if he wanted to capture me right now, he couldn't?" Ben asked, disbelief plain in his voice. "Do you have any idea what he is capable of? The only reason he hasn't taken me all these years is because he hasn't tried to."
"That doesn't mean I am going to make it easy for him." Leia replied sharply.
"You're not protecting me from keeping off this mission." Ben snapped. "You're limiting me. You sent me away to become a Jedi. You can't now decide it's too dangerous. You don't get to make that call."
"You're right. I don't get to make that call. However, your Master does. And he agrees." Leia said, and Ben felt his anger double as he processed Luke's betrayal.
"This doesn't mean you can't be of use to the cause." Leia said quickly when Ben didn't respond. "I would like to have our investigator speak with you. You can relay to him any information you can remember Snoke may have given you as a child concerning the First Order or his imperial aspirations. Anything you can remember would be of value."
Ben stared at her, practically shaking his fury. "So instead of sending me on a mission like a Jedi you're going to interrogate me like you would an enemy?" Ben snarled.
"It's not an interrogation, it's an interview-" Leia protested, but Ben didn't let her finish.
"Changing what you call it doesn't change what it is. You want to interrogate me because you don't trust me. That's why you won't send me on this mission. You don't trust I'll come back! All my life, you've been convinced that one day I'm going to turn to the Dark Side? Why? What have I done to break your trust? I told you about Snoke, I've trained in the Light Side, I've stayed loyal to the Jedi, I've done everything you and Master Luke have asked of me. So what is it about me that makes you so convinced I can't be trusted?"
"Ben, you are completely misunderstanding what I'm saying-"
"Don't tell me I misunderstand!" Ben cried, standing up suddenly. Leia stood up as well, attempting to reach out and touch his arm. This time, Ben shoved her hand off roughly and took a step away from her. "You think I don't notice the way you and Master Luke look at me. It's like you're afraid of me. What did I do to make you hate me?"
"Ben!" Leia cried, "I don't hate you-"
"Well you should because you know what?" Ben snapped, Amaya's words coming to his mind unbidden. Whose side are you on, anyway? "Snoke still talks to me. I lied. He never gave up. He's still in my head and I'm not even trying to get him out. At least he doesn't treat me like a problem that needs to be solved. And yes, I knew about the First Order long before you did, and I didn't tell you. Because I thought, naively, that if you didn't know that Snoke was still in my mind that maybe eventually you'd start trusting me. I thought maybe it was Snoke's fault you were afraid of me. But now I see that no matter what I do, I'm never going to be the son you wanted. So I give up. Tell Master Luke he can expel me from the Jedi Order if he wants because I'm leaving anyway."
"Ben, wait." Leia said, her face white as a sheet. "Stop. Come back here now!"
Ben ignored her as he walked down the hallway of the Senate as quickly as possible. Leia followed him, calling out to him, but Ben ignored her, climbing into the nearest ship and starting it before she could catch up.