Author's Note: Not as long of a wait, this round guys! But college will be starting back up for me on Monday and I will have considerably less time than I do now, so I hope this chapter will be enough to keep you guys happy for a while.
As always, let me know what you think! Loving your thoughts and opinons!
Also, for some reason, my (***) hasn't been showing up in my documents once they have been added to fanfic. (VERY CONFUSING). So instead, I'm using (. . . . . . . . ) to indicate both a time gap and to show shifts in p.o.v.
This fic is tightly adapted to Sasuke Shinden and Sakura Hiden. Please read the novels or refer to the summaries. I'm tired of waiting for their story, so have decided to write it myself.
Pairing: SasuSaku
Summary: After 2 years, Sasuke returns to the village where friends anxiously await him. Still troubled by the mysteries of Kaguya and his personal guilt, Sasuke is split between friends and his journey. One specific pink-haired individual has perhaps waited for him with far more dedication than anyone else. Troubled by rising casualties and international dependence on her abilities, Sakura is torn between her love for Sasuke and her duty to her village.
Chapter 6: "Over Tea"
Sasuke's eyebrows drew together at the kunoichi standing a few feet in front of him. Her silly red rain jacket nearly reached her knees and Sasuke couldn't help but think she looked as if she were drowning in it despite the water that was running off it. Just having thrown his jacket at him, she was trying her best to look serious, one hand on her hip and the other still clutching the remains of the bento box. If only she knew how ridiculous she looked.
It took everything in the Uchiha to check his temper. The previous night had been rough on him. Just as he feared, after all this time, the nightmares returned and Sasuke struggled to find peace in the darkness. With the dawn, had come the rain and the Uchiha had retired to the training zone nearest his campout, fighting the invisible targets in his mind to ease the tension in his body that accompanied the memories. Just as he was about to send his chidori through a tree, he had sensed her. Why he had immediately turned and headed in her direction, the Uchiha didn't know and was now regretting approaching her.
Now, as he sat with his jacket in his hands, he swallowed his retorts. After a few seconds, he rose to his feet and crossed his arms, replying to her order, "I'm not going anywhere."
"Then neither am I," Sakura said, walking over to him, situating herself in the exact spot where he had just been sitting.
Sasuke raised his hand to massage his temples and under his breath, he said, "I see you're just as annoying as you've always been."
"You haven't changed much either," she replied, glancing up to make eye contact with him. After a few seconds of shared glaring, Sakura's stern expression faded and she offered him a faint smile, to which Sasuke couldn't help but breathe out his frustration at the sight. Infuriating woman.
The thunder that shook the ground had the both of them wearing shocked expressions as a tree a few meters away from them lit up as it came into contact with the lightning that streaked down from the sky.
Without another second's hesitation, Sasuke reached his hand out and grabbed Sakura's arm, pulling her quickly away from the tree, just in case. He led her a safe distance away before releasing her arm and slipping back on his soaked cloak.
"Ok," he said, "I'll go."
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This was not a good idea, the Uchiha thought as he stared at Sakura's apartment door. She was fumbling with the lock in the rain and Sasuke frowned as the rain went from heavy to excessive in the span of two seconds.
He was making a huge mistake. It would be one thing for Sasuke to accepts someone's hospitality but it was something entirely different to accept Sakura's—the one person he was doing his best to avoid at all costs. What was he going to do now? This was the last thing that Sakura needed, for him to show up back in her life. He was doing her harm just by interacting with her.
A large click resounded and Sakura pushed firmly on the door.
"Come in," she said pleasantly, and Sasuke took one last second of indecision before sighing and stepping over the threshold.
Sakura flicked the lights on and hung her rain jacket on the rack next to her door. He jumped when her hands lightly touched his shoulders and he made to jerk away from her before realizing that she was just trying to lighten him from the load of his drenched cloak. He rolled his shoulders back, allowing it to roll off into her hands.
"Well, it's not much, but make yourself at home," she said after hanging his jacket next to hers. She gestured to the apartment around her and Sasuke couldn't help but take it all in, committing the layout to memory. He didn't know exactly what to expect, other than that it would be small, but the room before him was simple, clean, and surprisingly comforting. There was a large sofa, a yellow sitting chair in the corner, and a small bookshelf on the adjacent wall. He couldn't help but realize how warm it felt compared to the cool weather outside and the smell of cooked rice instantly made his stomach growl. He coughed in an attempt to disguise the sound.
Sakura smiled at him, leading him down the hallway to the bathroom.
"The shower is in here," she said, opening the door. "Once you are dry, then I'll fix you something to eat."
Sakura then retreated to the far room at the end of the corridor and Sasuke couldn't help but stand awkwardly in the hall as he heard her shuffling noisily in the bedroom. She returned a few minutes later, offering him a pair of large baggy pants and a blank white t-shirt, which Sasuke also noted to be his size.
"Whose-" he began, then firmly clamped his mouth before he could finish the sentence, instantly regretting what he was about to ask. He blushed furiously and turned to look away from her.
"Oh," she said, rubbing the back of her neck awkwardly, obviously catching on to his train of thought. "Those were my father's clothes before I claimed them. They're big but that's all I have and they should work until I can clean yours. Is that okay?"
"Yes," he said quickly, hiding his face from her. He entered the bathroom and closed the door, letting out a heavy exasperated sigh. He glanced down at the clothes in his hands and couldn't help but feel a little relieved despite his embarrassment. He leaned his head back against the door. What the hell was he doing?
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Sakura pulled fresh rice from the cooker for the second time today, arranging it once again into nori wrapped balls of rice, adding fresh tomatoes on top. She fumbled gracelessly with the plate, almost spilling it onto the floor when she heard the bathroom door open. Steadying herself, she breathed deeply to calm down as she walked over to the dining table, setting down the plate and pretending like nothing had just happened.
Sasuke walked into the room, appropriately post-shower disheveled, wet hair dangling in his eyes. Sakura couldn't help but appraise how her father's clothes hung loosely on his body. She snapped her gaze away when she noticed him raising an eyebrow at her directed stare.
"Here," she gestured quickly to the plate at the table. "I hope you don't mind vegetable Gunkan-maki. I added tomatoes for you."
"It looks more appetizing when it's not on the ground," he said bluntly, coming to stand beside the table. It took Sakura a second to realize he was teasing.
"Yes. Well, you'll be glad to know I'm not usually so clumsy," she said, then froze when a smirk became present on his face.
"Are you sure about that?" he remarked, sitting down across from the food. Sakura's face turned scarlet at the realization that he must have seen her flailing just a few minutes ago.
She took a seat opposite him, helping herself to her own portion of the Gunkan-maki. This wasn't her first time making it, but she found herself questioning whether or not that it was good and if Sasuke would actually like it. He ate quickly and Sakura realized that it might have been awhile since he had last eaten anything homecooked.
With this thought, she began to ask him about all the food he ate on his journey, what he did for shelter, and if he was treated kindly. He had short positive answers to the first two questions, both to what Sakura had expected. The medical side of her questioned whether he was getting the nutrition he needed along with the rest his body demanded after using the Rinnegan. He didn't answer the third question and Sakura pretended not to notice.
He finished his first serving so Sakura jumped up to get him more. Halfway through his second serving, she noticed him purposefully slowing down.
"There's more where that came from," she said with a small giggle. "I want you to eat as much as you can before you—."
He looked up at her and Sakura held her breath. She could have tried to backtrack or make an excuse for what she was about to say, but they both knew what she meant.
"When will you be leaving?" she asked boldly after a few minutes, a sad smile marking her features as she averted her eyes from him. She might as well ask, since he wasn't denying it.
Looking back down at his food, he answered, "Soon."
And there it was. The answer she knew she didn't want to hear. It hit her like a fist to the gut and heavy silence hung over the both of them. Soon.
As if wanting to leave absolutely no doubt, Sasuke added, "Once Naruto comes back to the village, I will return to my mission."
"But—" she began, then cut herself short, redirecting her gaze away from him. There was no point to try to convince him otherwise. She had already tried this once before and Sakura was aware of what Sasuke had to do for their village. She had once helped Naruto, Sasuke, Kakashi, and Obito defeat Kaguya. But now, Sasuke continued to search for traces of Kaguya and investigate her race of people that the shinobi world still believed to be out there.
It was hard for her not to think selfishly in this matter. What would she do if Sasuke might never be home for good? She couldn't bear the thought of eternal loneliness without him. And what would she do if he decided he wanted nothing to do with her, when he was home?
Standing, she grabbed the now empty plates from the table and returned to the kitchen as Sasuke observed her silently.
He followed her lead and began to help her, taking the plates from her hands and proceeding to wash them in the sink. Sakura panicked at his nearness and in order to busy herself, began to boil water for hot, herbal tea. She couldn't look at him and didn't want to face him, so kept her body strategically placed so that he was at her back.
"Sasuke, I understand why you must leave. I understand why you believe that you have to be the one to carry this weight. But please, when you're home, don't treat me like a stranger." Despite how hard she tried to resist them, small tears pricked the corners of her eyes as she said this. She couldn't help but think about the past week of knowing he was here but not being able to see him. It was unfair and absolute torture. She wiped furiously at her eyes before Sasuke could see them. All she could ever do was cry.
Sakura heard Sasuke turn the faucet off and lean against the counter behind her.
"Then also understand that it is not my intention to hurt you."
She could acutely feel his presence from behind her and after a few minutes of gathering her courage, she turned to face him.
"If you think that deliberately going out of your way to avoid me, isn't hurting-"
He took a step towards her and looked down at her, suddenly interrupting her, "Is this what you want? Is this how you want to live?"
"Sasuke," she began, placing a palm on her forehead. "However long it takes, I will wai-."
Sasuke turned away from her with an impatient sigh. He walked out of the kitchen and looked out the dining room window, watching the lightning streak across the sky. He placed his hands on the window sill and leaned forward.
"What is it with you people," he breathed out angrily. "You and Naruto. Why can't you just move on with your lives and forget me?"
Sakura gawked at him, frustrated with his hurtful words. "Because we can't, you idiot! You don't think that would be easier for me? For all of us? But guess what, Sasuke, it's not going to happen."
A solid ten minutes of tense thunder-filled speechlessness surrounded them before either of them made another sound. The sudden screeching of the kettle shocked Sakura into movement and she removed the pot from the heat.
"I'm sorry," Sakura said, pouring the hot water into two cups . "I didn't bring you here to yell at you." She suddenly felt very guilty. This was not how she pictured an evening with him.
"Don't apologize," he said, still facing the window. "I'll never be able to give you what you want."
After she finished infusing the tea leaves, she placed the cups on the table and continued to stare at his back. He turned to face her and the two of them both looked down at their feet.
"How do you know what I want, Sasuke Uchiha?" She saw him silently glance up at her in the corner of her vision. He pulled his hands from his pockets, sat down at the table again, and reached out for one of the cups on its surface.
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Sasuke stared hard into the tea, not wanting to answer her question. Of course, he knew what she wanted. Sakura, his childhood friend who grew up alongside him as a genin, wanted him to be with her. Selfishly, Sasuke had wanted nothing more than to find happiness, too, at one point in his life. That's why he had created the bonds that he had. He had wanted to be with his friends and eventually take root in Konohagakure. However, this was a dream Sasuke had abandoned a long time ago. His purpose had changed. He had become a ninja that the shinobi world now relied on. For the sake of those around him—for those whose happiness he had to protect but could not share in—Sasuke had given up that dream. There was something bigger now that was more important than what either of them wanted.
Instead of replying, he took a full drink of the steaming tea in his hand, warm relief traveling throughout his rigid body. He suddenly realized that this was a medicinal tea as his tense muscles instantly became relaxed. He couldn't help but be surprised at the tea's effects.
"Well," Sakura stated, sitting at the table with him again. "For starters, I want you to stop dodging me when in you're in the village. Can you at least do that?" She tried to smile, diminishing some of the tension between them.
Stubborn, as always. She didn't know what she was asking. By requesting this, she was only prolonging her own heartache.
"I'll agree," he stated. "But only if you comply to something that I want."
She stopped mid-sip, lowering her cup and arching an eyebrow. The expression on her face wasn't one of curiosity or wonder. Her eyes only professed worry.
"What's that?" she asked finally.
More intently than he had ever before, he firmly held her green eyes with his, wanting the full weight of his words to hit home with her. "I want you to stop waiting for me, Sakura."