A/N: I want to point out I started this, story earlier in the Fall than I did with my other crossover: Arashi Uzumaki of the Blue Plague, but still no where in the beginning, so if you want to know what happened in Blue Plague series before the point I used, you got to read the actual books. Just don't let kids read it.
I'm also censoring curse words as it's too many used in more than just saying usual ways that I can't ignore them all. At least with censoring I'm not going against my usual way of avoiding curse wordsof the Blue Plague series Tomas W. Watson, whose wife is Tina Watson. I should also tell you Watson always based a character after himself in his books, and in the Blue Plague series that's Bruce.
Finally, I don't own the Blue Plague series or the Naruto series or it's characters. But I do know the wife of the writer of the Blue Plague series Tomas W. Watson, whose wife is Tina Watson. I should also tell you Watson always based a character after himself in his books, and in the Blue Plague series that's Bruce.
if you see letters with '-' that's me sensoring curse words in case none of you realized that.
If you haven't read it yet, read this first:
Blue Plague's Nine-Tail Fox's Son: The Fall
Naruto's Speech and Bruce's Retribution
It was November first. Bruce sat in his chair drinking coffee after his workout. His shoulder only hurt with certain movements, but he could lift the same amount of weight he did before the piece of wood tried to kill him. Looking at his watch, it read 0610. Bruce looked around the Community Center to see people coming in after workouts. The Ninja Squad (as Bruce started calling Naruto and his friends) were already eating breakfast as usual.. The night crew was eating before heading to bed.
The storage area and fence were completed. They were putting several raised platforms along the fence to shoot attackers. The clan had been broken down to ten-person groups and were learning the ways to survive.
Bruce's group were the kids. His first class was going to be the ten to fourteen year olds. Bruce loved teaching the kids because they loved to learn, if you made it fun. Bruce was going over his lessons in his head as the rest of the family came in, grabbed some coffee and sat down.
Debbie and Stephanie kissed Bruce on the head before they sat down. Debbie looked at Bruce as she sipped her coffee. "Bruce baby, can I ask you a favor?" she asked, looking at him.
Bruce wanted to say "H- No," because when Debbie asked for a favor it was always something big that he didn't want to do. Bruce knew better than to say no because he still had to sleep in the same room with her. "Sure baby, what do you need," Bruce replied then gritted his teeth.
"I want you to talk to the women and girls we rescued from the gang's compound. Some are having a real hard time adjusting. Some just look like hollow shells. Your talk with Mindy really helped her a lot. I think you can really help some of the women and girls. I know it's a lot to ask and I wouldn't if I didn't think it would help," Debbie told Bruce.
"You're kidding, right?" Bruce asked, not believing what she had just said.
"No baby, I'm not kidding," Debbie replied, knowing Bruce was fixing to dig in his heels.
"You talk to them, you're a girl," Bruce told her.
"I have, so and so has Nancy, Angela, Stephanie, Millie, and Father Thomas, but we are not getting through to them," Debbie said.
"Well, them I can't do anything," Bruce replied, hoping to end the topic. Boys don't like to talk about that stuff.
"I haven't talk to them." Naruto pointed out, "Let me talk to them."
"He can be convincing and encouraging when he wants to," Temari said. "He even encourage my brother Gaara to find a new meaning of life and because of him Gaara is Kazekage."
Temari didn't bring up her brother use to be a cold blooded killer who killed anyone that challenge him or threaten him. But she still tried to be convincing.
"He did make that speech during the funeral," Angela said. "And he helped Cade."
"Fine, but if Naruto fails, Bruce, please speak to them. That way we know we tried everything to save them."
"Okay," Bruce agreed, giving up.
"When should I speak to them?" Naruto asked.
"Tonight after supper. We will clear the Venter out so you can talk to all of them at one time," Debbie answered.
"Sounds good," Naruto said as Millie brought plates over to the family that came in. Bruce shoveled the food down before Debbie could ask for anything else. Standing up Bruce kissed Debbie and Stephanie then kissed Angela on the head as he left to get dressed.
"Thank you, Naruto," Debbie told Naruto. "I didn't think you would agree, otherwise I would have asked you."
"Why wouldn't I?" Naruto asked.
"Guys don't like talking about stuff like that," Stephanie said. "Page Five: Emotions."
"Huh?" Naruto responded.
"Nothing," Stephanie said.
"Naruto isn't like most guys," Sakura pointed out, figuring that Stephanie must have read that from some book (as she wasn't there when Bruce gave his speech about the male half of humanity).
"I'm going to train before class," Naruto said as he teaches stealth movement (no better to teach it than a ninja, and the ninja squad agreed Naruto was one of the best of them). Along with him, Sakura had taken teaching how to recognize medical herbs and their uses. Sai and Yamato teaches basic ninja weapon training.
"Didn't you just finished your morning workout?" Angela asked.
"He's probably just psyching himself up for the speech," Sai said. "I noticed Naruto can be most convincing after a battle."
Meanwhile, after Bruce was dressed, he head to the machine shop for his first class. Bruce had five .22's with suppressors attached lying on a table behind the shop. He waited for the kids to show up. Bruce sat up targets at twenty and fifty yards. Then Bruce laid out five M-4's with suppressors and magazines as his first group arrived.
Bruce pointed at the ground and told the kids to sit down as he started. "First, let me tell you a gun will kill you if you let it. It is just a tool, you are the weapon. If you accidentally shoot one of the clan, it will be your fault not the guns. If any of you do not listen then you might kill one of your friends."
Bruce told the kids looking into their faces. He saw he had their attention.
"You are the weapon not the gun, so you must be trained not the gun," Bruce said then held up his right index finger. "This is your primary safety and the only safety you will ever trust. Machines fail so do not trust your weapon's safety. YOur finger is never to be on the trigger until you are ready to shoot something. When you shoot something, you shoot to kill it, because if you wound your target it will kill you in return," Bruce told the kids, getting a lot of alarmed faces.
"I will teach you how to survive and use a gun; I'll turn each of you into a weapon. If you don't have balls, you will have them after I'm finished with you," Bruce told them, getting several giggles.
"I'm not kidding. I'm training you so others out there can't kill you or worse. I want your attention and respect. If you have a question, then ask. The only stupid question is the one not asked. Now let's get started."
Bruce started with the .22, explaining how to shoot with iron sights and the basic workings of a firearm, Then Bruce paired them off, showing them how to shoot the .22s. After an hour, Bruce moved to the M-4s. Bruce showed them how to take them apart and put them back together.
The kids enthusiastically took the M-4s apart and put them back together. Then Bruce showed them how to shoot the M-4. The gun was big to most of them but they tried, always keeping muzzle disciplined with the guns. At 1000, Bruce led the kids to the shop and explained the basics of close quarter combat (CQB). Bruce stopped at 1130, leading his group to the Center for lunch.
The kids ran to the line to get some food as Bruce headed to his table. He was the last from the family to arrive for lunch. Danny and Buffy were wearing karate gis since they were teaching hand to hand. Well, Danny was teaching and Buffy was helping.
Bruce sat down as Millie brought a plate over to him. Bruce looked up at her, drawing in a breath to say something but Debbie cut him off. "Shut up Bruce, you lost the bet. Until she stops, you will sit and eat what Millie brings you," Debbie told him.
"I just want to get my own food once, Debbie," Bruce replied.
Mike looked at Bruce from the opposite end of the table. He rolled up his sleeve, showing Bruce a red mark. "I tried today to get my own plate and she popped me with that d- spoon. Millie told me your et was for the whole family, not just you, Bruce," Mike said, rolling his sleeve back down. At that moment, Naruto returned from the serving table with his own plate. "And yet Naruto is allowed to get his own food!" Mike complained.
Naruto stopped mid-bite. "Did I miss something?"
"No Naruto, Bruce and Mike just being bitter about Millie serving them," Debbie said.
Naruto shrugged. "What can I say? I betted my way out of Bruce's bet. Besides, its not like I don't let Millie serve me from time-to-time."
"Yes, and because of it, you not only earn the right to get your own food but are the better man than these two for it," Debbie added.
Bruce and Mike grumbled in complain but didn't dare to say it outloud with Debbie right there.
Bruce turned to Danny and asked, "How is hand to hand coming, sweet pea?"
"Good, Daddy, but I have to say most of these women are stupid. They think a woman can't fight a man and I have to show them in each class," Danny admitted, shaking her head.
"That's what most are taught, baby," Debbie told her.
"Ugh don't remind me," Temari said. "I grew up trying to avoid girls like that because I wanted to show everyone I can be just as tough as any boy."
"Having a brother like Gaara-the way he use to be I mean-probably helped," Naruto said. "The way Gaara was, you have to be good as well as have courage to deal with him otherwise you and Kankaro both just ended up one of his victims."
Temari smirked realizing what Naruto was getting at. "That's true."
"Well, I'm glad I had my daddy and not theirs. Daddy always told us the only person that can beat you is the one you let beat you," Danny replied.
"You are being nice while teaching class, right Danny? These women don't need some teenage girl telling them they're stupid," Debbie stated.
"No Mom, I'm being good, even if they are stupid. I's just hard taking that out of their heads."
"Have you tried sparing in front of the class as demonstration?" Naruto asked.
"No. Most who can fight are on guard duty or teaching," Danny pointed out.
"Why don't you ask one of the men around here already trained in hand to hand to spar with you for a surprise class demonstration," Naruto said. "That way the girls can see for themselves what the female half of humanity."
"That can work," Debbie said. "Nancy and I can clear up a schedule for that person if needed."
Danny thought of it and nodded. "Okay. Thanks, Naruto."
Deciding to change the topic slightly, Bruce asked, "Danny, how is Buffy coming along?"
"Great, Dad, she is ready for her black belt in Kenpo," Danny said in between bites.
"Danny, don't you think you're exaggerating a little? You've only worked with her a few months," Bruce responded.
"Dad, Buffy is my sister. How would it look if she was not a total bad a-, like me? I mean come on, I have worked with her every day. She has gotten really good but still has trouble with the hand weapons," Danny stated.
"I really I wish I would've been there when you gave birth to Danny," Debbie said, smiling at Bruce. He just shook his head.
Bruce turned to look at Buffy. She was just looking back at Bruce, in disbelief that he doubted her training. "Buffy get out beside the table. I am going to call out moves and for each one you get wrong, Danny owes me ten pushups," Bruce told her. Buffy just looked at Bruce in shock. Danny just kept eating; she wasn't worried.
Bruce watched Buffy move to the other side of the table; she was wearing her black gi with a white belt. "Kata 1," Bruce called out. Buffy started the movement of the kata, moving in fluid motion. When she finished, Bruce called out another kata. After Buffy complete it Bruce started calling punches, blocks and kicks. When Buffy performed all of them, Bruce started calling out techniques for for different attacks. Bruce continued the test for an hour. Everyone in the Center had stopped eating to watch the little girl go through her test, which Naruto had noticed. When Bruce stopped, Buffy was drenched in sweat as she moved to her chair.
Bruce looked at Danny as Buffy sat down, Breathing hard. "Danny, I have to admit you taught her well. Why is she still wearing a white belt?"
Danny looked at Bruce. "Daddy, you're sifu, not me."
"Danny, you will present Buffy with her belt. You taught her, so the honor is yours. I'm very proud of you, sweet pea." Bruce was filled with pride.
Danny ran over to Bruce, wrapping her arms around his neck kissing him. "Thank you Daddy."
Bruce looked at Buffy. "Buffy, you did very well and I'm proud of you also." Buffy ran over to Bruce, hugging him and Danny.
Danny told Buffy to head to the gym while she went for a black belt and the girls took off.
Debbie just looked at Bruce. "We have a preteen and a teenage girl that can beat the s- out of most men. Don't you think that is just a little scary, Bruce?" She asked.
Bruce put his arms around the twins sitting on each side of him. "Just think, you have two more to look forward to," Bruce said as Debbie stared at him. Then she got up and left the table. Bruce just thought Debbie believe he was being a s-. He didn't see Debbie wiping a tear from her eyes.
Naruto did and got up and headed after her.
Once they were outside, Naruto hollered, "Debbie, are you alright?"
"Yeah, i'm just proud of my daughters," Debbie said.
"It's more than that, isn't it?" Naruto asked. "It's about what you talked to Mike and me about-you dying?"
Debbie froze.
"Look I came out here instead of stopping you in there because I know you don't want Bruce finding out, but you don't need to keep this to yourself," Naruto said. "You got to include others in this for your own sake. You can't handle all the burden just because you think you will die."
"I don't think, Naruto, I know I will die," Debbie said.
"Okay, sorry, wrong words," Naruto apologized.
"It's okay. And you're right, Naruto, and she already knows," Debbie said.
"She? Who? Stephanie? Angela?" Naruto asked confused as Debbie shook her head.
"Carroll," Debbie replied. "She talked me into telling her what I can Sunday."
"Oh," Naruto said. "Well that's good."
"Naruto, I appreciate the concern, but you really got nothing to worry about," Debbie said. "I'll be fine. I need your mind focus on what you are going to tell those girls tonight."
Debbie hugged Naruto and headed off to her shooting class.
Bruce met his group of kids under the fort. He gave each kid a sheet of paper with a list on it. Once the kids read through the list they all looked at Bruce.
"This is a list of things each of you will put in a backpack when we bring in some. This list is for your go bag. This bag is to stay packed and by your door at all times. You can add more stuff, but be careful because you will have to carry it if we have to leave suddenly. Now for the first items: fish hooks and fishing line," Bruce said, then reached in one of the pouches on his vest and pulled out a small plastic box. "I keep mine on my vest, in case I'm separated from my pack," Bruce told the kids.
Then Bruce showed them how they could use the hooks to fish, catch birds, or set traps. Bruce went over each item on the list and showed them how to use each one. At 1700 when the call came over the radio to for classes to end the kids groaned. They were having fun with Bruce. He promised them that they would continue tomorrow but their brains needed rest now.
Bruce led his group to the Center for Supperand Bruce headed toward the table. The family gathered around to eat, laughing and talking over the days activities as was most everyone else. Debbie, Stephanim Angela, and Nancy left the table during supper; they walked around the tables, whispering in the ears of certain women and teenage girls. Then they returned to the table.
At 1900, Bruce stayed not only to encourage Naruto, but to speak in his place if these women still need a talking to when Naruto was done. He might as well get it done when he can if needed. Debbie walked to the front of the building and yelled for everyone's attention. When the talking died down, Debbie spoke. "I would like everyone to head to the patio. Mike is going to go over the teams for the big runs we're going to do when it gets cold. The people Nancy, Angela, Stephanie, or I spoke to, will you please stay in here? We want to talk to you."
The clan left the building and headed to the patio, leaving fifty-four females in the Center plus Temari Sakura and Bruce. Stephanie closed the door and locked it. Debbie looked at the women and teen girls around the room.
"I have someone who wants to talk to you. Before he comes up here, I want someone to talk to you."
To Bruce's and Naruto's surprise Temari walked up. "Listen up ladies, the guy who is about to talk to you is a good friend of mine. He hasn't gone through what he has, but he has his own history of suffering, and I doin't know if its related, but either way he has a unique ability to change people's hearts just by talking. I know because he changed mine once, and he did it for my brother too. So pay attention to what Naruto Uzumaki has to say!"
Naruto walked up slightly bashful. "Um, wow! Thanks Temari. I never had anyone spoke up for me like that as an introduction." Naruto cleared his throat. "But she's not wrong, I did have a tragic life. My dad was killed when I was a young fox. Although one of the surviving men who killed him found me, he took me in hoping to raise me to set as an example, that creatures like me whose true forms are consider monsters can live with humans. I tell you, I didn't make it easy. I pulled pranks, set traps, basically gave h- to those around me or anyone that tried to get close to me. I even pay for it a few times. One of those times though, was what set me straight. I had to go search for a human friend I can trust. I found two, Kuroda and Takashi. Unfortunately due to unplanned events Takashi was killed, but that just help Kuroda who also had trust issues due to his own history, and myself to trust each other which build our friendship."
"That's what friendship is all about: Trust! Even if its among family or strangers, trust the key to building a bond. So trust me when I say, you need to hold the burden of what happened to you to yourselves. You're no longer alone in this new apocalyptic world. We can help you move on and more importantly learn how to fight back so whatever happened to you in the past won't ever happen again."
"I notice earlier many of you saw Buffy doing martial arts in the back. Let me tell you, I was there when Bruce saved her. That day monsters in human form was raping her biological mother Karen and was using Buffy to make her listen as they did so. Buffy didn't know how to fight back, but after Bruce took her in, she learned how to fight in hopes one day she can protect those she loves instead of force to sit back and watch. And when we finally got home her new family took up doing the same. Now along with being a black belt in a martial arts styles, she can use several different guns to fight. She has a new meaning in life, and we can offer you the same thing, but only if you are willing to accept it."
"I'm sure many of you lost love ones in this infection, and let me tell you Takashi wasn't the last loss I suffered. Heck before I came to this worlds, not long before I lost someone I came to see as a grandfather figure to someone that could of been a surrogate brother of mine if his life didn't turn out the way it did. The pain of losing someone that close never leaves. There will always be death in the world. You can't prevent it. But you are still here, and you can still carry their will through this treacherous time. As long as you are alive and you treasure your memories being with them, their deaths will never be for nothing. But if you choose to die because you lost hope, then they might as well be truly dead to you." Naruto said. "As for me, as a quote from a book that man who I told you was like a grandfather to me wrote but only few knew about, if there is peace in your world, I will find it! I won't give up!"
With that Naruto finished and all the girls came up and told him thank you. As each one came by Naruto saw the hopes and determination on their faces. Bruce felt relief seeing all the girls come up to Naruto knowing they be fine and he wasn't needed.
Bruce left the Community Center and found Mike talking with a group of people on the patio by the swimming pool. Mike looked up as Bruce approached.
"Hey brother. How'd it go?" Mike asked.
"Every girl that stayed behind is now thanking Naruto for his inspiring speech, so I say good," Bruce said. "That boy really can talk when he puts his heart into it."
Mike laughed. "He was that effective huh? Maybe we should see if he can do that next time we bring in hostages from an gangs hideout."
"Yeah. If I knew was that effective as a speaker I would have told him to talk to those girls earlier." Bruce said.
Stephanie left the center.
"Are the girls still thanking Naruto?" Bruce asked.
"No, but they are asking Naruto if he has a copy of that book he quoted from so they can read it," Stephanie said. "I even ask for a copy."
"What did he say?" Bruce asked.
"He left his only copy at a memorial site he made for his surrogate grandfather before he came to this world," Stephanie replied.
"That doesn't sound too bad," Mike said.
"I'm just glad its over with, and I didn't have to speak up," Bruce said.
"I'm sure you would be just as effective as Naruto." Stephanie said.
"How?" Bruce asked.
"You would talk about love, hope, honor compassion, pride, and determination, and the list goes on and on," Stephanie told him with a joyful.
"More like reach down and grab their balls and live their life," Bruce corrected.
Stephanie's smile vanished as she stared off for a second thinking, then looked back at Bruce. "Well, yeah, from a boy's standpoint, that is what you said."
"Anyone could have told them that," Bruce said. "That's what Naruto did."
"No, Bruce, Naruto speaks from the heart using his own experience. you say it so a girl can understand how a boy would deal with a bad situation," Stephanie replied.
"Whatever," Bruce said.
Stephanie stared at Bruce, a frown marring her lovely face. "I now know why Debbie wants to slap you when you say that."
"Just because you sleep in my bed doesn't mean you can slap me," Bruce warned her.
Stephanie leaned toward Bruce slowly. Then she quickly licked Bruce's face from chin to forehead, then jumped back. "Ha, now what do you have to say," Stephanie challenged.
"You are so going to get it, girl," Bruce replied, wiping his face off.
"Do anything and I'll tell Debbie you were mean to me," Stephanie threatened, seeing Debbie walking toward them from the center.
"You wouldn't dare," Bruce replied, calling her bluff.
Grinning, Stephanie looked at Bruce and glanced toward Debbie. As she got closer, Stephanie called out, "Debbie, Bruce is being mean to me."
"Bruce!" Debbie yelled, coming around the end of the swimming pool and heading toward Bruce.
"Debbie, now wait just a minute-" Bruce started as Debbie cut him off.
"I was coming over here to tell you that you don't have to talk to the girls, only to find out you're being mean to Stephanie?" Debbie popped off, coming to a stop in front of Bruce with arms crossed.
Bruce pointed at Stephanie and started stuttering then manage to get out, "Debbie, she started it, all I did-"
Debbie held up her hand. "Bruce, you expect me to believe Stephanie started it? I know she was coming over here to give you the same news I was then you were mean to her?"
Bruce just sat back in his chair, looking at Debbie. Debbie cocked her head to the side as she returned Bruce's stare. "What?" he asked. Debbie nodded her head toward Stephanie.
Bruce just looked away until Debbie started tapping her foot. Bruce looked at Debbie with alarm on his face. Then he turned to Stephanie. "I'm sorry, Stephanie," Bruce apologized for something he didn't do, but he just wanted the wrath of Debbie to go away. Mike busted out laughing.
Debbie smiled at Bruce and jumped in his lap. Stephanie joined her. Bruce's only response was blurting out loud, "I'm such a pussy." This send Mike into another round of laughter.
"What?" Debbie asked.
"I'm such a pussy," Bruce repeated. Mike was having trouble breathing, he was laughing so hard.
"Well, we will get you a douche so you can be a clean pussy," Debbie told him as she kissed his cheek. Mike slid out of his chair and hit the ground laughing, trying to breathe.
"Get up, please," Bruce requested. Debbie and Stephanie got out of Bruce's lap as he stood up. He kissed each on the cheek then stepped past them to glare on the ground. "You could've said something," Bruce told Mike, who just lay there looking up at him grinning.
"Are you kidding? That was great," Mike managed to get out before laughing more.
"I'm going to put on a tampon," Bruce told everyone as he stormed into the house. Angela Nancy and Naruto walked in time to hear Bruce's last comment as he went inside. Mike was pounding the ground with his fist howling.
"Should I be worried?" Naruto asked.
"I don't know," Angela responded.
Nancy looked at Mike then to Debbie. "What happened and why is my husband laughing so hard he's fixing to pass out?" Nancy asked.
"I had to remind Bruce who his boss was," Debbie replied.
Nancy nodded her head and looked down at Mike. "Mike, do you need a lesson as well?"
Mike coughed and struggled to his feet, holding in the laughter. "Sorry baby, it was just so refreshing to see Bruce punked down by little Debbie. He didn't do-" Mike stopped as he looked at Nancy's stern face. "You're right, baby, I wasn't laughing. I just have a bad case of gas. I'm going to walk it off." He headed quickly to the shop and made it halfway before collapsing to the ground again, laughing.
"Boys!" Nancy exclaimed.
"They never interrupt or take sides when a buddy is getting chewed out by their spouse or girlfriend. It's poor form and they don't want to get in trouble with their own spouse, page fifty-six," Stephanie stated. Nancy just looked at Stephanie with a questionable stare as Debbie started giggling.
"What are you guys talking about?" Naruto asked.
"Nothing for you to worry about, Naruto. You're safe from Bruce, so go ahead and go inside," Debbie told him.
Naruto shrugged and headed in.
Debbie then turned to Stephanie. "You are truly trying to use that book. I'm proud of you. Let me guess: Bruce really wasn't being mean to you?" Debbie asked.
"Well, not really. He did say 'whatever.' I wanted to shake him hard," Stephanie admitted."SO he was being a smarta-. That's just as bad. That one expression has p- off more women than anything else," Debbie stated.
Angela asked, "Why is Bruce going after a tampon to wear?"
"He thinks he wimped out," Debbie answered.
"Bruce, wimped out? Look in the dictionary under big boy, you'll find a picture of Bruce," Angela predicted.
"Sometimes I have to remind Bruce my balls are just as big as his," Debbie replied.
"Oh, that's different," Angela agreed with her.
"Come on girls, let's make sure the kids are ready for bed. It's 2100 and class is tomorrow," Debbie said, heading toward the house.
The women rounded up the kids and headed upstairs. Debbie, Stephanie and ANgela had their small posse of kids. As they walked into the room, the found Bruce sitting up in bed writing in his notebook as he went over the supply list that the boys had gotten from the judge and the congressman. Bruce looked up as the small army entered the room. I'm putting another bed in here, Bruce thought.
Debbie smiled at Bruce. "Did you get it taken care of, baby?"
"I'm not talking to you right now, but to answer your question, I found a super absorbent one to put on," Bruce replied as he continued going over his notes, making changes here and there. THe women just giggled as they helped the kids get ready for bed.
Angela came out of the bathroom with Cade and headed toward the bed. Bruce just stared at her psychotically as she walked across the room. Angela noticed his stare but tried to ignore it until she got to the end of the bed.
"Oh, alright, Bruce," Angela said exasperatedly before reaching down and taking off her socks before she climbed into bed.
"I jumped out of bed last night when caterpillars crawled up my leg, and I hit my head on the d- nightstand," Bruce told Angela.
Angela snorted as she stifled a laugh. "What is it with you and caterpillars?" she asked.
Bruce raised his right arm up, showing Angela a three-inch-long one-inch wide scar in his armpit. "I got this from a fuzzy caterpillar when I was a little boy. vIt burned like acid and continued to hurt for weeks. And yes, I still have nightmares about caterpillars."
"I'm sorry, Bruce, I thought you just had a foot fetish and I wanted you to work to see my feet," Angela replied with a serious expression. Debbie started laughing as she climb in bed.
"I told you I did but those feet are on the other side of the bed," Bruce replied.
Emily and Sherry jumped in bed, crawled up to Bruce and showed him their feet. "We don't have socks on, Daddy," they said in unison.
Bruce kissed their little feet, saying, "That's because you love Daddy and don't want mean caterpillars to get him." The twins jumped on Bruce, hugging him and covering his face with kisses, then climbed under the cover.f
Stephanie followed the twins into bed. "That's cool, Bruce. I didn't know you had a foot fetish." This sent Debbie into a fit of laughter as she buried her face into her pillow.
"Shut up Debbie, that's between us," Bruce told her. The warning only made her laugh harder.
Stephanie pulled her left foot up to her chest. "I have ugly feet compared to Debbie and Angela," She commented.
"No Stephanie, you have very pretty feet," Bruce said as he continued going over his notes.
"You've looked at my feet, Bruce?" Stephanie asked, smiling at him.
"Of course I have," Bruce answered, causing Debbie to start kicking her feet as she laughed.
Angela rolled over to Debbie. "You have got to share this with us," she pleaded with Debbie. Then suddenly they heard a bloodcurdling scream coming from Mike's room down the hall.
Next they heard loud banging coming from Mike's bathroom on the other side of the wall, and Mike yelling at the top of his lungs, "G- it, Bruce!" Followed by another bloodcurdling scream, "My balls are on fire!"
The three women jumped in fright and then, as one, they turned toward Bruce. Bruce was reading his notes, smiling, his body shaking as he laughed silently. They heard running footsteps out in the hall heading toward Mike and Nancy's room.
Bruce looked toward the door and said, "Be careful when you put on my boxers for the next few days. Mike doesn't have much of an imagination so his retaliations are to reciprocate in kind."
As Bruce finished speaking, Nancy busted into the room, breathlessly demanding, "Bruce, what the h- did you do? Mike ran to the toilet and started splashing water on his balls, screaming. After use used all the water, he jumped into the shower, turned on the cold water and is doing a headstand so the water hits his balls."
Bruce's shoulders shook harder as he laughed silently, still holding it in, then he gritted out. "I didn't know Mike could do a hand stand."
"He never has before. All of the sudden, he started yelling at me to blow on his balls. I didn't know what was happening and told him to forget it. That's when he ran for the toilet," Nancy said.
Bruce struggled to hold in the laughter then informed Nancy, "I put Icy/Hot in his underwear. The burning will stop in a while."
Nancy just stared at Bruce before replying, "Bruce, I'm not in the mood for another practical joke war."
Stephanie stated out loud, "Retribution is mandatory when a buddy does not help a buddy out with a spouse and laughs when they get in trouble, page fifty-nine."
Bruce looked at Stephanie. "What? Page fifty-nine of what? How do you know this stuff?"
Stephanie looked at Bruce with a blank stare and replied, "The male brain secretes more dopamine related to serotonin production when the molecular structure of testosterone alters-"
"Never mind, stop right there," Bruce said as he gathered his notes, setting them on the bedside table.
"Bruce, no more please," Nancy pleaded as another high pitched scream came down the hall. Then Mike waied, "My balls are on fire!"
"That is up to Mike. We're even as far as I'm concerned," Bruce said as he lay down. Nancy ran back to see if she cold help Mike's balls.
Debbie just shook her head. "Bruce, I agree with Nancy, no more this war stops now."
"Mike has had his payback. I can't say that about others," Bruce replied with his back to Debbie.
Debbie scoffed, "You going to prank Naruto, after he talked to those girls so you won't."
"No, as far as I'm concern Naruto earned his pardon for betting his way out of my bet with Mille by talking to those girls. Besides, although I won't tell Millie this directly, it is on her for not making sure Naruto can't use any jutsus in their bet."
Plus Bruce already tried to get back on Naruto by telling on him to Carroll, and not only that failed but backfired. He wasn't going to admit it though, at least not as long as he's in sound mind or fully conscious.
"Then who-" Debbie's eyes widened. "Bruce, I'm not in the mood for your jokes so drop it."
Stephanie looked at Debbie then spoke. "Bruce you can't do something like that to Debbie."
"I never said she was the only one, now did I?" Bruce replied as Stephanie scooted away from him toward Debbie for protection.
Angela spoke in a tiny meek voice, trying to sound small and fragile, "Bruce, I didn't do anything."
Narrowing his eyes, Bruce just said, "Caterpillars."
The three women put the twins, Cade, and PJ between them and Bruce. They stayed awake until Bruce fell asleep and was snoring peacefully. Feeling safe, the three huddled together and fell asleep.
At 0120, Bruce's wristwatch vibrated, waking him up. Bruce eased out of bed, headed to his closet, grabbed several blankets and spread them out on the the floor. Moving to the bed, Bruce gently moved the kids to the pallet on the floor; then covered them up.
Bruce started jumping jacks at the foot of the bed, gulping down air. Then he walked around, shaking his waist. Finally he moved to the bed, tucking the comforter under the mattress around the bed. Smiling, Bruce eased back under the covers, pulling the comforter over the girls' heads and holding it down his arm.
Bruce started squeezing his abs and making himself fart, continuing to fart for five full minutes. He heard gasping and coughing coming from under the blankets. Debbie was the first to wake up and began fighting to get out of the toxic air. She pushed against the blanket but there was no give. With tears in her eyes, having had experience with this in the past; Debbie crawled around the bed looking for a way out."
Stephanie and Angela woke up as they felt Debbie crawled over them looking for a way out of the noxious fumes. Stephanie yelled out, "Have we been attacked with poisonous gas?" then started coughing and gagging.
Debbie crawled around the bed, pushing on the edges, but the blanket wouldn't give. Trying to hold her breath as she searched for an escape route, Debbie almost passed out when she had to take another breath. Starting to gag, Debbie yelled as she moved towards Bruce's side of the bed, "D- it Bruce, that's enough."
As Debbie crawled toward him, Bruce let out a loud fart that shook the bed. Debbie screamed and backpedaled to her side of the bed, putting as much distance between her and Bruce as she could. Angela and Stephanie just started kicking the covers, trying brute force as their eyes continued to burn. Feeling pity for them, Bruce pulled the covers back to let the girls out and they lay there gasping for air. When the smell hit Bruce, he almost felt sorry for holding them under for so long. Almost, but not quite.
Debbie got out of bed and collapsed on all fours on the floor coughing and trying to expel the toxic fumes from her body. "Bruce, you know how much I hate the Dutch oven," she manage to tell him.
Stephanie looked at Bruce with her bloodshot, watering eyes and smiled. "That was a good one, Bruce," she said with a dry raspy voice.
"Good h-, that's why women don't have nose hair," Debbie replied, still on all fours beside the bed.
"My eyes are burning," Angela said then looked around before asking, "Where're the kids?"
"They probably chewed a hole through the mattress to escape," Debbie replied.
"I wouldn't endanger kids like that," Bruce said.
"Bulls-, you've done that to each of the kids several times. The only reason you quit was because the kids' doctor thought Jake was developing asthma. Strange that you quit and his lungs improve," Debbie said, standing shakily.
"I only did it to them once or twice," Bruce shot back.
"Bruce, I just tried to breath out of my tits. Once is too much," Debbie replied, heading toward the bathroom.
Angela giggled. "I didn't realize just how important clean air was," she said as Debbie walked back out, spraying air freshener. When Debbie finished Angela stated, "It smells like someone s- vanilla."
Everyone laughed as Bruce got out of bed to grab the kids. Debbie stopped him. "Bruce, just let them sleep down there. The fumes are not as toxic on the floor.
Angela looked at Bruce. "I promise that I will never ever wear socks in your bed again. Bruce, I think something crawled up your a- and died."
Bruce smiled. "I usually get even, Little Foot."
Debbie looked at Bruce then said, "Bruce, get in the middle of the bed. Stephanie, get on his left side, I'll take the right. Angela, lay on his chest. If he gets up, get a bat and hit his knees."
Everyone piled on Bruce and drifted off to sleep, ruining Bruce's next payback.
A/N: I just want to say, when balls are mention in ways of men and women having, of course they don't always mean in terms of men's privates. First off, grab your balls is the character's way of saying toughen up. Not a way I would say in real life myself. Also when they're talking about having big balls in a figurative term such as when it came with women, they mean that in their terms and mind that person is cool and/or tough.
As for why this chapter was just as much if not more on Bruce is to build up to his retribution in the end because it's just too good to pass.