This story is a work of fiction. Any similarities to events or persons living or dead in your world is purely coincidental.
5/21 Tuesday
Lunch
Despite her relative youth compared to most on the force, detective Makoto Nijima didn't think it too presumptuous of her to believe she had been through a lot leading up to her current job.
How many other cops could honestly say they'd ventured into world formed from the distorted minds of violent criminals, defeating them from within? How many had employed their guns against not only violent humans, but Shadows, creatures born from the very darkest of thoughts, some of which were larger than cars.
When asked, her friends had expressed similar opinions on the matter, the idea that everything that they'd done and endured as Phantom Thieves had helped to prepare them, had helped to toughen up their spirits for whatever lay ahead of them on their chosen road to adulthood. That only made sense. Surely becoming friends with their leader, Akira Kurusu, hadn't been the only factor involved. On reflection, she was amazed that he hadn't cracked from the stress of being the director of their activities, both inside the Metaverse and out.
But that was beside the point right now. The point was that she hadn't felt quite this creeped out by a fellow human being since the fall of Masayoshi Shido's palace.
Father Shigetsu, the crippled shepherd of a small but loyal congregation at his church, was making her think not of the perpetrators of certain painfully familiar crimes, but of the victims. Handcuffed to a wooden railing and forcibly seated at a bench, deprived of his brass cane, he struggled against it with his eyes wild and wide with terror, spittle flying out over his robes and nearly staining her uniform.
"They have returned! They are coming! The two sides... the calamity! It cannot be stopped!"
If her senior partner, officer Iaji Hideki, was as thrown as she was by the sight, he hid it well. He looked bored, regarding the aged priest as one might regard a mad dog straining against a leash, occasionally prying bushy black hair and sweat back away from his scalp but little else now that they had spoken with all the frightened witnesses. Hideki was fairly young himself, but at twenty-nine he had four years of experience on the force that he held over her at every turn, quickly establishing ground rules about who called the shots when they were on duty.
Makoto often considered him lazy, but he generally stuck to the rules. Most importantly, he wasn't one of the canny few who had managed to escape the purge some five years ago that had placed so many officers on trial for corruption alongside the higher ranks. She couldn't imagine this thin-faced man with his waxy ribbon beard coercing a suspect into signing a confession by breaking their leg, and certainly not shooting an unarmed one on the say-so of some distant puppet master. There were certainly worse people on the force she could have been paired with for her orientation.
"The VEIL! They are COMING!"
Iaji shrugged at the father's ranting, leaning against a bench. "Yeah, yeah, yeah, we heard you the first time. When 'they' get here we'll arrest them too. You're worried about nothing, old man."
Perhaps... But Makoto knew better than to drop it at that. Not with father Shigetsu's otherwise sterling record before and after the driving accident which had claimed his leg. She wasn't about to let her irrational fear of the man stop her from getting to the bottom of the current issue.
Iaji, meanwhile, was sighing in exasperation as she returned to the church. "Hey. You wouldn't happen to have a gag on you, Nijima-san?"
She snorted in amusement. "I'm afraid not. Besides, it might aggravate his condition."
"Not sure if it's possible for him to be even more of a nut job than he is already", Iaji remarked, speaking higher than normal to be heard over Shigetsu's shouts. "Not unless it was..."
The psychotic breakdown incidents, her mental narrative finished for him. The effects of those mysterious shutdowns had left their mark on Japan long after the defeat of their instigators. For what seemed like forever, any kind of deadly accident or breakdown would have being chalked up to being the latest edition of the illness. Only recently had their drop off in frequency caused the rumors to cease.
But the victims of the breakdowns hadn't even been able to talk. At all. This old man was doing that and then some.
"I don't think so", she reassured him confidently. "Those ended years ago, thankfully."
"Maybe", Iaji conceded reluctantly. "Still weird though... all these people I spoke with kept going on about what a nice guy this old man is normally. Then he just goes crazy and starts hitting people in the middle of a sermon? Can't help but think back to those times. The bad times."
Makoto nodded. Finally, something they could agree on. "You were in college then, right?"
"Uh-huh", he confirmed more quietly, studying the benches. "Second year. One of my professors, Ohabara-sensei... he was riding the subway when that damn breakdown happened. I couldn't believe how unprepared they were for it. Had to wait for months before they found a replacement for that course."
"I'm sorry", she said in all earnestness. Knowing exactly what had caused that famous subway accident wouldn't help Iaji now. Despite our success, we can never forget those who were lost to those accidents, all of it because of Masayoshi Shido's greed...
She supposed that was the reason why her hands always tightened whenever she saw one of JCAP's colorful posters, or worse, was assigned to 'crowd control' at an actual rally on the streets of Tokyo.
When she'd heard from one of the sermon's frightened attendees about the time months ago when the church had actually been vandalized, her throat tightened and her breathing quickened. Some part of her had screamed to drop everything else and find some evidence linking it to a JCAP supporter, but it would be completely impossible to prove now.
She had long-ago recognized it as the same part of her that actually wanted JCAP to become more reckless than they were, to be more violent in their rallies... So that she and the other officers could arrest them. Or at least do something so she could feel like she wasn't doing nothing about it.
Patience, she reminded herself in a forced calm. Remember. These people genuinely do believe that they are working towards a better tomorrow for all native Japanese citizens by pushing to remove outsiders. It's not their fault that the leaders are such skilled manipulators of the truth... Like most politicians.
Still, she couldn't deny it sometimes made her wish the Metaverse still existed. As Queen, as a Phantom Thief, she could have traveled into the cognitive worlds of Murama Gouki, Hanae Oda and all the rest, and extracted the real truth behind their words from their own Shadows. Even changed their hearts for the better if that was what it took to make the movement collapse.
Yes, and we know where that slippery slope would end up. We were given the power to reform society, to thwart the malevolent God at the center of the world's distortion and the evil man who was carrying out the God's desire.
Nothing else.
Even if she had fully resisted the temptation to abuse the power of a continued Metaverse for six years, she knew not every member of their team might have. Ann-chan...
A pang of pain shot through her head and she paused. She would not have even faulted her friend, Ann Takamaki, for wanting to do that after all she had gone through lately. Might have even joined her. Ann could very persuasive when she wanted to be.
Akira Kurusu's earlier words to her from years ago rang as true in her ears as they almost always did. It was really for the best that they were no longer the Phantom Thieves, even if it didn't feel that way to her sometimes.
Enough. You're not a Phantom Thief anymore. Not Queen. You're an officer of the law.
"It's no problem, Nijima-san", Iaji picked up upon seeing her deep in thoughts about the past. "Just bugs me sometimes, that's all. You can spend your whole life working hard, chasing your dreams, and then lose everything just because one asshole can't keep it together." Seeing the father going into frantic spasms, he turned back to him. "Yeah, I'm talkin' about you, old man. You're just lucky you didn't hurt anyone, or I'd really let you have it."
Satisfied with the silence, he stood up, stroking his tiny beard. "I'll call in an ambulance just in case. Watch him."
Leaving her alone with the mad-eyed priest. Which was what she'd wanted, even if her body wanted to be elsewhere at the moment. She sidled up to the cuffed man, trying calm him down by raising her hands defensively.
"The monsters", Shigetsu was still muttering desperately. "A monster has come to our world. Just like before..."
5/21 Tuesday
Afternoon
Aiko said nothing- did not trust herself to say anything- until she'd managed to grab the Shadow wearing her friend's face and voice by the arm and lead him out to the fountain at the school's main entrance. He didn't resist her grip, only breaking away from her when they all saw that no one was watching.
"Hey, now. What's this about, Tsuruga-chan? You're not mad, are you? I mean it's not like we're going steady or anything... unless you want to change that-"
"Shut. Up", she bit out finally, her eyes twitching. "You're not Julian-kun. You're just a Shadow. So stop pretending!"
A very Julian-like expression of polite confusion came onto his face then, only to be quickly replaced with the look of someone holding onto a royal flush. "Huh? How did you... oh. Ohhh yeah. Heh. You're those ones, right? The intruders I locked up the other day? Didn't recognize you without your little cosplay."
"And I didn't recognize you without that... voice thing."
Mirambela stared at their confrontation in alarm. "So he really is... but Shadows can't come into our world! How did he...?"
"Sorry. Trade secret", he said, his hands folded behind his head innocently. "You're wrong though, Tsuruga. I am Julian Rosea. I'm very the best parts of him, got it? And the only thing that I want... is to be free."
The blood rushing through her head finally ebbed and she could think clearly again, trying to size up and comprehend the enemy instead of merely raging incoherently at this farce. "You came to stop people from investigating Julian-kun's disappearance."
The Shadow looked genuinely impressed by that deduction, leaning back on the stairway's stone rail. "Jackpot. Got it in one! Things were getting pretty loud, and I didn't want to rock the boat too hard just yet. It's easier this way. I can enjoy myself until that pathetic loser's seen the light."
Until he's dead. "You are a monster."
Stepping back, the Shadow now hauled himself up onto the rail and waggled a finger at her tauntingly. "Oh, come on. Now you sound like those JCAP morons, goin' after me just 'cause I'm different. I only want to be free, that's all." Twisted smirk widening further, he vaulted off the stone rail onto the tarmac, dangerously close to Aiko now and presenting an exposed cheek to her.
"Hey. How 'bout it, Tsuruga-chan? We can enjoy ourselves together until the time is right to say goodbye forever to that loser."
Remotely in some place far removed from her current state of horror, Mira felt amazed at the number of emotions her friend's eyes and mouth slid through in just a few seconds at that suggestion, starting with abject shock and alarm before changing to throbbing fury pulsing through her temples and settling on flat-out disgust that manifested itself in slow, stony words as she folded her arms defensively:
"I would rather kiss a sewer grate than you."
The result on the other end was equally stunning to behold. The relaxed smirk on the Shadow's face transitioned into a frightening glower of rage even greater than the one who had rejected him, and when he spoke, the eerie reverb he'd had in their first meeting had returned.
"Fine. Fine. I see how it is. You'd take that loser over my awesomeness? Guess I'll just have to find someother ways to enjoy my freedom then. Heh. Heheheh!"
He hadn't managed to visibly scare Aiko until now, when her face grew pale at the realization of what he really meant by that. No one else besides them knew that Julian wasn't Julian. No one else knew that this revolting creature had none of the kindness and consideration that tempered the original's ego.
"We'll stop you", she managed to blurt out at last, trying to hide her mounting terror. "You try to hurt anyone, and we will stop you. We know what you are, Shadow."
The Shadow heaved an overly melodramatic sigh, his smile returning.
"Tsuruga-chan, I don't know if you've forgotten this or something... but y'know, you are a girl. You can't stop me."
"And you're a worm", she spat back at him. "Want to see who wins that fight?"
The Shadow stared.
Aiko stared.
Mirambela couldn't tell which of them accepted the invitation first.
There was an indefinite pause stretching out, an outstretched hand, a shaky, crazed flash of movement... and the next thing she knew, her best friend was being held in place by the manically leering man in a double-armed grip that roughly wrenched her arms up, around and behind her back, twisting muscles and bone until it forced a gasp of pain and panting.
"Yield." His voice was a dark breeze just behind her ear, but loud and forceful enough for Mira to hear it as well. "Give in to me. Beg to me. My cute little... Fairy."
"Mmm... fff... you...!"
Only after hearing that did he release her to slam into the rough concrete of the stairs.
"Well... that was fun!", he remarked, casually examining one flexing hand. "Checkmate. Shame I can't really cut loose in this world though. People might notice that. You okay there, Tsuruga-chan? Did I gwab the wittle baby a bit too hawd?"
It was only then that Mira realized that Aiko truly was in too much pain to actually reply, still panting heavily as she felt at her arms for any kind of permanent injury. Shewould have to be the one to answer the Shadow now.
"We will stop you!", she warned him, trying her best to sound tough like her friend did in these situations. "As soon as we save the real Julian-kun, you'll disappear!"
She was impressed with herself for managing to get all those words out without a hint of fear, but the Shadow clearly wasn't, treating her with even more disdain than before. "As if you could ever save that loser. Just let him stay there in the world he desires. Really, it's better than he deserves, but hey, I won't complain."
Sensing that Mr. Takao was coming back, he hopped up the stairs back towards the main doors, giving them a finger gun that fired in salute. "Bang, you're dead. Later, Tsuruga-chan. If you ever change your mind, I'll be here... if you're ready get on your knees and submit."
By the time she could speak again, the Shadow was gone. Only Mirambela was there with her, the occasional student passerby providing offhand remarks about how her relationship with the 'hafu' must be going but silence beyond that until Mira broke it.
"He really... the Shadow's here in our world. How?"
"D'no", Aiko managed to grunt out, numbly feeling along her left shoulder to make sure that nothing was permanently dislocated. The Shadow might have had the appearance and build of Julian Rosea but he was far stronger than any human had the right to be. "That... sucked... UGH!"
Concern clouded her friend's features. "Lean on me. We'll go to the nurse's office."
"No", she coughed up, waving both arms around in the air to show that they were fine despite the pain wracking her muscles as she did. "No, no, no, can't, we h-have... to f-finish this. Have to-"
Left shoulder exploding into fresh pain, she fell. She was surprised by the ease with which Mira caught her, moving her own broader shoulder up to support her. A rare reminder of how different they were not only in age, but size. She felt like a broken doll in Mira's strong arms. She didn't like it.
"Can't go... Have to stop him... Have... To..."
But if her friend had lacked the fortitude to be adamant with the Shadow, then she had no such problems brooking no further arguments now. "Vervlaks, you're as bad as he is. You have to rest, Ai-chan. You have to get better, and recover your strength, and lead us. So for now, all you have to do is be quiet. Please."
"Have to stop him", she protested, then blinked. "Weare still on for this, right?"
Mira felt insulted by the suggestion, but only mildly. Out of the three of them, she had been the one who had been constantly suggesting that they give up on trying to save Julian, the one who enjoyed fighting Shadows the least, and the one most worried that they would die trying. The one who had the least faith in their ability to defeat the Shadows which roamed that dust-covered Land.
The truth hurt, as always. But after the pain of truth came an oddly soporific sense of freedom.
Now, I have no doubts at all.
"Oh we are on, alright", she assured her friend, carefully hauling her up the stairs against her unspoken protest. "And then some."
5/21 Tuesday
Evening
To her immense relief, Julian's Shadow had skipped out on the nurse's office himself for much the same reasons as she had initially wanted to. They didn't have to look at each other there. Even better, the kind nurse had readily bought her excuses about what had happened to her arms, perhaps recognizing her as Benihime Kujou's favorite target for bullying.
Those arms felt much better now, and she had an ice pack on the worst of it, but Aiko had the sneaking feeling that the pain in her head wouldn't subside until she'd wiped that superior, gloating smirk off of the Shadow's face. They had gathered in their dorm room as usual after class and explained the situation to Pelagio at length.
"Hmph. So that is his plan", the falcon noted reservedly, having now recovered from his initial bout of rage and self-recrimination after hearing about what he had done to her. "We must watch that Shadow to ensure that he doesn't hurt anyone else, but if we do that, then we cannot travel to his Land to save the true Rosea."
"That's it, pretty much", Aiko agreed, trying to keep the lingering fury and pain out of her own voice as she spoke. It would help no one. "I don't know if he has some way of detecting if there's intruders in his Land or not, but we can't risk leaving him alone any time outside of classes. You'll have to watch him tomorrow, Pela-tori."
Mira couldn't imagine a worse duty than that, but Pelagio accepted it without complaint. "He shall not harm a soul while I am there watching him, my lady. Two humiliating defeats from that repulsive wretch is more than enough."
Yield.
"Good. Meanwhile, we need to find some way to distract him, get him in a position where he won't have time to hurt people while we're gone."
"How do we do that?", Mira asked aloud, hoping to hear a good answer. "We can't stop him from doing whatever he wants. As far as everyone else knows, he's just Julian-kun. If he decided to kill his parents tonight, we wouldn't be able to stop him."
Give in to me. My cute little Fairy.
"An alarming concept, certainly", Pelagio admitted from his perch on the ledge. "Fortunately for us, an unlikely one as well. He came to your world in order to prevent people from becoming suspicious and worried about his human self's disappearance, yes? He would need to lie low and wait for the time to run out before he would consider himself free to engage in such vile behavior."
Mira relaxed about half an inch hearing that. "How is he doing that? Don't other people see his eyes? Or hear his creepy voice? I mean, what is wrong with people?!"
"It is likely that only we three are able to detect those signs", Pelagio explained. "Because we have visited Faraway Lands, which has expanded our minds, changing our cognition."
Free, huh?
Innocently, Aiko checked out the status of the water outside, squinting to see through the window in the darkness of near-nightfall. It was still a high tide with decently strong waves, but it gave no indication of how long it might remain that way.
Julian-kun's still out there, waiting. Thinking he's in some kind of paradise while this Shadow runs around with his face and name.
"So, we're actually safe from him doing anything bad out in the open that would attract a lot of attention. Thanks, Pela-tori. That's a big load off. I still want you to keep an eye on him though, just in case. I'll call Nijima-san as well tomorrow, and tell her what's going on."Anything he does do is still on us, for not acting quickly enough. Maybe she can help with that.
Climbing up onto the refuge of her bed, she put a hand to her temple, trying to jar an answer loose.
"Of course, even if we go back to his Land, we still have no idea if Julian-kun is willing to return with us when we find him. We need to understand what exactly made him walk into that gate, and why that reason is wrong."
"Just like with me", Mira remembered shakily. It wasn't a fond memory, although it had been once upon a time. "Tomorrow, then. We'll search around the city for anything that might relate to Julian-kun's problems. His parents are a start, but Tenri-kun knows him from last year as well."
"Tenri-kun", Aiko repeated, adding the injured soccer veteran to the list of possible contacts who would help them. "Obviously, it had to be related to George, or Gentaro, Rosea as he's known here. That person who called his parents when he died... the caretaker. You think they might know something?"
"That would definitely be a better lead than Tenri-kun", Mira agreed eagerly. "We'll need their address, then. I just hope they haven't quit because of that."
"Even if they did, we'll find them", Aiko promised. "If I have to question every single person in this city to save Julian-kun, then that's what we'll do."
Mira paused, unsure of how the next words she wanted to say might be taken. When she noticed even Pelagio staring raptly at her, she went forward with it.
"Ai-chan... You're still so dedicated to him, after what we just saw today? After what he just did to you?"
To her relief, Aiko didn't seem angry with her at the idea. Just confused and frightened, any lingering fury directed entirely at the Shadow instead of her. The memory of her brief time fighting it in the real world continuing to play itself back in her mind again and again on loop.
Yield. Give in to me. Beg to me.
"Okay", she breathed out. "Fine. I'll admit it. Julian-kun... he really might not be the kind person that I thought he was when we went out on a date. But... you know for yourself how Shadows are, Mira-chan. Julian-kun's Shadow isn't really him, any more than your Shadow was the real you."
"But it was", Mira emphasized carefully, still trying to make someone who had never met their own Shadow understand her words. "That's what I keep trying to tell you. Deep down, I really did feel the same things that Shadow was talking about. I wanted Kujou and Mattora, and everyone else who believes in JCAP's ideals, who had ever picked on me to suffer like I did, and worse."
She seemed momentarily paused by that concept, though she had surely heard it before and had weeks to process in her head what exactly the relationship was between a Shadow and the person it originated from.
"I told you that I try my hardest not to hate anyone", Mira continued staring back into her shrouded gaze. "But that doesn't mean I don't still do that sometimes. Sometimes... I just can't help myself. The only way to get that Shadow to give up was for me to accept that was the way I really felt, deep down... and for me to realize how stupid it was for me to feel that way."
Breathing out pure, unrefined tension, her friend nodded back slowly. "Between how his Shadow behaved and the cognition of me that we saw, I get the feeling he's taken a liking to me. I mean, duh."
"Shadows are the manifestation of a human's suppressed inner thoughts", Pelagio offered peaceably, concerned that they might have another fight right there. "Anything they wish to do or say or be that your civilization forbids them is pushed into the background, into the depths of consciousness. Suppressed, but never forgotten."
Aiko felt her hands involuntarily tighten into fists. "So, you're saying that the Shadow is the way that Julian-kun would behave if he didn't care at all about getting in trouble? Or about anyone else's feelings?"
But the falcon's round crested head shook a negative. "You forget that there is so much more to a human mind than only their Shadow, captain. Everything about them that you see regularly, that isn't suppressed... thatis what is currently stuck in sir Rosea's tailor-made prison. The good qualities which first attracted you to that young man are what the malevolent shell currently residing in our world lacks."
Biting into the swelled flesh on the inside of her cheek from the ravine jump, she nodded calmly. Pelagio's explanation was a lot better, a great deal easier for her to accept as fact than the notion that Julian really had been the louse they'd met today all along. "That's right. You said their 'souls' were trapped, and in danger of being lost."
"A bit of artistic license on my part, perhaps", he said sheepishly, raising his uninjured wing as if to guard against an accusation. "I must confess to a poetic nature at heart. But essentially correct. When we saw miss Sorano speak with her Shadow before, it was the two disparate halves of her consciousness aligning with each other, and becoming one mind again."
"I told you", Mira insisted. "She was me. Honestly, I really shouldn't be judging Rosea-kun for anything that his Shadow does here. If that means that we're both bad people inside, then..."
"Like hell", Aiko corrected her acidly, seeing Mira jump in fright at her words. Unlike Reiha or Julian, she used that kind of language sparingly enough that it remained a jarring shock to hear coming from her young mouth in the few rare cases that it did.
"If anything, Mira-chan, you're a way nicer person than I am. And... I don't carewhat kind of dark thoughts Julian-kun's been keeping locked away inside him. He's still a human being. He doesn't deserve to be stuck out there all alone, no matter what he's done or what he wants me to be for him. And Nijima-san is right about that. We have no right to judge."
She looked back at Mira, who seemed more impressed by those words then than anything Aiko had done to save her back then. "I guess so. It's just kind of depressing to realize just how many people must have hidden Shadows inside of them."
"Nearly everyone", Aiko made a guess, making a mental note to talk to Nijima about this topic when they had more time. "Especially adults. I'm honestly surprised that I didn't have one myself."
"You are more talented than you believe, my lady", Pelagio encouraged her. "For one, I have never witnessed a gift such as the 'wild card' before now."
"Maybe." She sniffed at the window, wondering if they would luck out and spot Julian's Shadow from there. Anything to distract from what was really eating her mind up now, and fighting to free itself through her lips until she could hold it back no longer.
Yield. Give in. Beg.
Pain. Beg and the pain will end. You can't win.
As before, Mira seemed to read her with ease, watching and waiting silently for the pain and humiliation to catch up, and offering up a comforting smile when they did.
"It's okay, Ai-chan. My mom always said that there is a great power in tears. It's not weakness, like so many believe. It's the strength to admit your grief, to admit when you can't handle something. When you know that your anger is useless, you cry instead. Go ahead. It's okay."
In contrast to the storm brewing on the outside, she had to laugh inwardly at the realization. From inwards to outwards the laughter spread, finally, grudgingly manifesting itself as an uncontrollable, minute-long bout of agonized sobbing and wailing that she had believed her body had long ago lost the ability to create, restrained as it was by years of maturity since the last time she had cried in public.
The ice pack continued to sting her arm heedlessly and now her face was streaked with burning tears sliding down her face... but for some reason, she felt better than before, blinking and sniffling as she spoke like she had a pronounced head cold.
Neither Mira or Pelagio looked surprised. They'd known from the moment they'd seen her get out of the nurse's office that something was still terribly wrong with their appointed leader.
She found it difficult to speak after that.
"Uh...Thanks. Sorry. Both of you. It's... been... Been a long time since I did that. Used to do it. All the time. When I was in middle school. Wasn't always 'Aiko the Psycho'. Used to... be called... 'Crybaby Ai'. So. Learned to... not cry. Ever."
Mira and Pelagio exchanged looks with each other. They were concerned, but hardly repulsed by the sight of their leader breaking down into tears. "It's only fair", Mira offered peaceably. "After all, you've seen me cry more than once."
"You are still human", Pelagio agreed from his window perch. "Humans seem to make strange keening noises and leak water out of their eyes whenever they are in times of extreme stress or sorrow. Or at least the females do."
They both glared at him over that, but they couldn't keep it up for long before Aiko collapsed into sniffling laughter on her bed at his words. "T-thanks, Pela-tori. I... I needed a good laugh, just then."
"I think we all deserve a good laugh after this is over", Mira offered. "Something that won't kill us or make us cry. I'm up for any ideas."
"Something that will make Pela-tori laugh", Aiko agreed eagerly. "This requires planning!"
The raptor's eyes narrowed in confusion. "Hmph. If your wish is for me to laugh, my lady, then I shall laugh."
"No, no, no!", she shook her head, amusement glittering in her eyes driving away the earlier fear. "You can't just order someone to laugh. It has to be something that they really find funny. Don't worry, Pela-tori. I'll think of a way. That will be my next goal after we save Julian-kun."
"Finishing the easier task first", Mira observed. "Good idea." Returning her attention to Aiko, she carefully placed a hand to her friend's face to wipe the last of the tears away.
"Like I said; you shouldn't feel guilty, Ai-chan. Not after what you've just been through. I'd cry too."
"Thanks." Leaning back onto the bed, she sighed up at the ceiling, hands clenching up from the memory. "That's the problem, I guess. What happened back there at the fountain with Julian-kun's Shadow... if he'd wanted to kill me right there, no one could have stopped him from doing it. Not even you. Without my Personas, I couldn't do anything at all. I was completely helpless."
"You have my sincerest apologies, my lady", Pelagio said devoutly. "Merely give the order, and I shall punish that wretched knave for this affront to your dignity."
"No", she raised a finger in warning. "Just follow him around after tonight, and report back. If he actually tries hurting someone, then you can claw him up. But not until then, understand?"
Pelagio reluctantly nodded, talons clenching and unclenching with suppressed desire of his own.
"I've been training with captain Byzael for over a month now", Aiko continued on, speaking to no one in particular now. "Fighting Shadows. Fencing with Umaeda-sensei. I've been fishing whenever I have time, and carrying those heavy plates at the Starlight diner too. Yet that creep pinned me in three seconds. Maybe... maybe I'm just not meant to be strong."
Now Pelagio sounded harsher than normal, his raptor's eyes piercing into her defeated musings and memories of exactly how it had felt to be so helpless in the Shadow's tight grip.
"That is an unfair comparison, my lady, and you know it. Shadows possess strength far greater than any human even before they discard their masks and transform. You are not weak. You are quite strong, for a human."
"Besides", Mira chimed in, "if you're really that worried about it, just look at Hayato-senpai. She's practically a bodybuilder underneath that Goth attire. If you keep at it, you can be as strong as she is... if that's really what's important to you."
"And there are other forms of strength besides the physical", Pelagio continued, eyes piercing into them both. "You girls have taught me that much already."
"Okay, okay, okay", Aiko threw up her hands in surrender, smiling. No matter what any Shadow did to her, no matter how she felt, or even if she cried, she would always have at least two people who would never give up on her. "Okay. I get it. My pity party's over with now. Time for us to go get things done. Tomorrow."
Mira gave a teasing chuckle. "After homework, of course."
Another sigh, one more resigned. "Of course."
5/21 Tuesday
Evening
Aiko had gone to sleep expecting to endure the worst; the renewed sensation of those awful hands grabbing her and pinning her. The awful sensation of helplessness. A hideous. prideful voice rasping in her ear, commanding her submission and threatening her with pain unending if refused him.
Yield. Give in. You can't beat me.
Thankfully, at least for tonight, that voice was silent even in her memory. There was only the feeling lingering now, the awful sensation of phantom hands running themselves over her body.
Scared? My little Fairy?
The taste of air that was not truly air was familiar to her now. Standing up into blue drapes and perfectly circular port holes was no longer alarming, and neither was the sight of her host. She wasted no time on the first question at hand.
"Did Nijima-san ever come here?"
Seated at the single table, Igor leaned back with his usual gleaming rictus smile. "Ah. A most interesting question, Dream Voyager. Yes, and no."
Beside him, the velvet room attendant Bartholomew shook his head in vexation and gestured around at the wooden floor and the dark ocean still raging outside. Even he could get annoyed at his master's tendency towards the cryptic sometimes. "This velvet room changes according to the perceptions of its occupant. It was a very different-looking place back when the Trickster was our guest here, though its purpose remained the same; To nurture the human spirit through times of darkness."
"Indeed", the host agreed, sharp nose unnaturally still in the non-air. "Even then, the noble allies of the Trickster only ever visited that velvet room once, at the final hour of their triumph. For the time being, this room is yours alone, Voyager."
Head sinking down towards the cards already carefully arranged on the table, he moved one hand down to touch the back of the nearest card, which had yet to be revealed.
"It would seem an unexpected situation has arisen. The enemy has acted to prevent your successful abduction of the lost one."
"Shadows emerging into the real world", Bartholomew nodded in more obvious concern. "I never believed that it was possible until now."
Sharing in their worry, Aiko tried not to let her voice falter. "Just the one, I hope. He hinted that he had some kind of outside help getting out of Faraway Lands. Some other power backing him up. If a Leviathan Shadow ever got loose in our world..."
The danger of that scenario hung there in the air, begging to be addressed until Bartholomew tipped his naval cap down until his eye patch was partly hidden. "Yes, that would be a disaster. Thankfully, the Shadows which are intelligent enough to take advantage of such a thing are few in number. However, that does little to diminish their threat in the other world."
"We noticed", Aiko nodded. "We'll be better prepared next time. Actually, that's part of what I wanted to talk to you about, Bart-kun. Can we do that 'fusion' thingy again?"
The attendant gave a wry smile, moving over to tap one of the hanging cages near the wall. "Of course, Voyager. This ritual was created for your benefit, and hardly meant to be used only once. Truthfully, I'm surprised that you've waited this long before employing my services again."
She shrugged, by now more that used to how foolish talking with these two made her feel sometimes. Clearly, dealing with past wild cards had left them with high expectations for the future potentials.
Just have to hope I can meet those expectations. If how Nijima talks about 'Joker' is any sign, then I've got a ways to go yet.
Still, she wasn't gong to forget the detective's previous words to her either; When you smile all confident like that, you look a bit like Joker.
But... did Joker ever cry like I just did when he got hurt and humiliated like that?
No. Doesn't matter. I'm not Joker.
Joker is Joker. And I am me.
I'm Saber.
And I will never be so helpless again. Never.
"I need to be stronger", she offered the attendant, her arms wide imploringly. "More than that, Mr. Igor, I need to be confident in that strength. When Mira-chan and Pela-tori see me fighting... They need to see someone who encourages them to try hard as well. Someone who will convince them that no fight is ever hopeless, that we still have a chance to win, no matter how strong the Shadow is."
As always it was hard to tell with his ghoulish face, but Igor seemed quite excited over her honest declaration of need. "You understand, then. A leader's purpose is not merely to give out orders to those underneath them, but to also provide an example to others. Yes... the Trickster was a positive example to many others as well, both those on his team and outside it. Kindling their wills of rebellion to heights of power which they would not have been able to reach alone."
"Then... That's what I need to be", she agreed. Then frowned. "That's what I want to be, not just need. I want Mira-chan to be confident in me, that I'll always be there for her. I want Pela-tori to know that I can always take of myself without him hovering over my shoulder all the time."
"Yes. Nearly all humans need dramatic examples to inspire them", Bartholomew seconded. "Even those examples, those greatest of leaders, require inspiration in turn, whether fact or fiction."
Knowing where he was going with that idea, she chuckled quietly, arms clasped behind her back.
"I guess I really can't hide anything from you two, can I? This is all inside my head, after all. Yep, I've been reading up on Anne Bonny in the school library. And even before that, I can see the kinds of characters that I liked watching in cartoons on TV who led up to that. The champions. The leaders. They were all so strong. All my life, I just wanted someone who could be like that for me in real life... turns out, I am that someone. I just didn't think of it that way until now. Until my Persona showed me the truth about who I am."
"There is no need to hide", Bartholomew offered with a welcoming smile. He must have known about the few stressful years in middle school when she had been 'Crybaby Ai', but there was no judgment in his expression.
"I always find it so fascinating how historical legends can inspire humans to action, even if they are grossly distorted representations, or were never even real at all. Because it provides them with an ideal to strive towards, a person who they wish to become... A mask."
"That's it", she agreed. "That's right. I need stronger masks. And I'm sorry I didn't ask you before now. I guess... I guess I was still reluctant to let go of them. Even the weaker ones like Onkot."
"That", the attendant wryly, "is another extremely common human trait. The reluctance to let go of a possession, or even a friend, which has remained with you for some time, and become a comforting presence. Most humans desire stability, a sense of continuity that promises them the world will still exist tomorrow."
Chuckling creepily, Igor raised his gloved hands to encompass the whole of the 'velvet ship'. "Ah. Yet, change remains immutable. An entirely static world is no more desirable than an entirely fluid one. This velvet room, my home, shall ever be subject to constant change, so long as human thoughts continue to shift."
"For as long as humans exist", the attendant echoed, turning back to their guest. "Your loyalty to your masks is most admirable, but you must remember what I told you before. They will continue to live on in new forms. And..."
Reaching into his buttoned sailor's vest, his produced a new item. A large, thick-covered book with a grinning skull and crossbones on the cover, so prominent and sharply colored that Aiko thought it might very well leap out of the tome. Instead, Bartholomew merely split the book open to show her the inner pages, most of which were dusty and blank.
"It took me quite some time searching through this place's inner halls", he said proudly, "but I finally found where my predecessor hid the Persona Compendium. With the special rituals in this book, in exchange for a certain monetary fee, we will be able to restore any of your former masks from your memory alone."
Brightening at the idea, she stared into the pages, the letters of tiny, archaic writing, already sensing the familiar shape of Fomor and even Gu Huo Niao within them. "So they're never really lost forever... good. Then, let's get this started, Bart-kun. I want to do some Fusion until I'm ready to beat that creep wearing my friend's face. I'll make him cry."
The attendant was all too pleased to oblige her. None of the trio said anything beyond what was necessary as the rope-bound cages accepted new occupants, dropping into the black abyss again and again, each time reforming into newer, stranger shapes whose increased strength and potential could be felt the very instant they stepped out of their prisons to meet and greet their new master.
The master who maintained a solemn, silent vigil all throughout the process, each time bidding a fond farewell to everything that she was surrendering in order to gain victory.
It wasn't until she woke up the next day that she would become aware of tears staining the sheets of her dorm bed.
5/22 Wednesday
After School
Tosashimizu city remained as it always was. People bustled about, driving, walking, talking, texting, eating and shopping. Completely unaware that one among their number was no longer truly human.
They were here today to begin to change that.
The Rosea house looked exactly the same as it had the last time they had visited. She was probably imagining the idea that the white stone exterior looked a bit more subdued than before, a little bit less lively. What was harder to believe was that it had only been a week since that previous visit, since everything had spiraled so far out of control and the only son of that family had disappeared from the world.
It felt like a lifetime had passed.
"Are you sure about this?", Mira asked from behind her shoulder for the sixth time, in not quite so many words.
Aiko nodded in understanding, but the answer remained the same. "I know. You don't want to hurt them. I don't either. They've both suffered enough already. But they'll suffer even more if we don't do this."
Once again, she found herself glancing up into the sky expecting to see Pelagio gliding around there, their ever-present protector, and only then remember that he was watching the Shadow. They were on their own for this one, and quite abruptly the house didn't just feel drained, but also potentially dangerous.
"You don't have to come with me", she offered quietly. "I get it if you don't want to talk with Mr. Rosea, after the things he said last time."
But it was Mira's turn to put her foot down, pounding one fist into an open palm. "And leave you to deal with them alone, just because he might say some stuff I don't agree with? If I did that I'd never come to school."
"Point taken." Trying to forget all the imagery and sounds from their first visit, Aiko carefully stepped up to the door, raising a fist to knock-
And nearly cried out in surprise when the door slid open at her touch. "Not locked?", Mira questioned. "After they got vandalized a few years back?"
"They were locked before", Aiko pointed out, already sliding the door the rest of the way open to see exactly what was going on, to see if anything matched the theory already brewing in her head. "Must've been a mistake. It happens. Maybe more than usual now."
And somehow, that made it even more difficult to take the first steps in, though they managed in the end. The hall and kitchen beyond were dark this time, only lights from the living room an indication of habitation, guiding them towards it.
It was a television's light, she realized. It was too inconsistent to be one of the small ceiling lights they had seen used here last time, shifting around in various planes of color acting as the sole illumination in the dead-seeming room.
"Daddy!"
The sound- the first out of the general murmur of the TV that she had been able to make out- made her jump before drawing them in closer. By some unspoken instinct, both remained behind the kitchen counter, close enough to see the TV as well as take note of the light reflecting off the motionless face of the seated viewer. Mrs. Rosea only had eyes for what was on the screen then, taking no note of any intruder.
"Daddy, look! Look! I'm riding! Mommy! Daddy, I'm riding! Look!"
Seeing little else available that didn't involve a very awkward reveal, she focused on the show as well. The recording had the slightly off-kilter color balancing that suggested that it wasn't a professional recording or live broadcast, complete with the occasional shaking of the camera.
That did a disservice to whoever had been holding it, she knew. People watching live reports all the time and usually failed to appreciate how the slightest twitch could send a camera's view flying. It needed a steady hand, and as it zoomed in on the source of the noise, even these small shakes vanished.
The boy riding the horse had chubby cheeks common to his age, what adults called 'baby fat', that made his blush more pronounced and his lips look puffed. That did nothing to diminish a certain trait that Aiko had once known and forgotten; a simple, unarguable element to any child of that age when they were having fun. The smile of uncomplicated joy on that face made her smile for a moment as well before returning to the issue at hand.
"Rosea-kun", Mira whispered in her ear. "It has to be." That was the only part of the video that either of them could recognize. Both the location and the horse were completely unfamiliar, some kind of plain sparse of grass with a wooden fence around it.
"Daddy, look!"
The horse jumped forward then, and Aiko feared the child might fall, but he held onto the reins well, showing a beginner's experience at riding that she didn't think was possible for someone so young. Hauling back further on them ground the animal to a halt, allowing Mrs. Rosea- a much younger-looking version- to step in and help him get back down to the ground. The moment he got there, he started stroking the horse's flank affectionately.
Then they could no longer see what happened next, as a dark figure rose up out of the chair to block their view. This time it was Mira who jumped, but there was enough light to spot the look on the present-day Mrs. Rosea's face.
She didn't look mad. She didn't look like much of anything towards them at first, emotions slow and unfamiliar to rise to the surface until some part of her remembered how to smile.
"...Silly. I guess I must have forgotten to lock up. Don't tell him, will you?"
Obligingly, Aiko reached over to flick the light on. At the same time, Mrs. Rosea was switching the previous light off, the image of the smiling brown-haired boy vanishing to be replaced by her blue dress.
"Sorry, Mrs. Rosea. We didn't mean to barge in."
"You're not barging", the woman observed distantly. Almost happily, like she'd wanted them to come. "You're sneaking."
"W-we didn't want to. We just..."
Sensing her falter, Mira nodded. "We came here to ask you about Rosea-kun. But if now's not a good time-"
Relief spread over her portly features then, giving her leave to release a breath that had been cooped up far too long. "Oh, thank god. Thank god. I was beginning to wonder if I was going mad. If we both were going mad. Thank you. Thank you, both of you. I'm sorry I don't have much food to offer you right now. I'll prepare something-"
"That's fine, Mrs. Rosea", Aiko said respectfully, fighting off a panic attack. She was already having nightmare images of the Shadow bursting in on them mid-snack. Pelagio had said he was nowhere near the house right now, instead heading off to the mall, but that could always change.
It wasn't her suggestion that stopped Mrs. Rosea from carrying through on her idea, she noted, but a weariness that could be felt all the way from the kitchen, like it was something that she wore and carried with her at all times. In fact, she might have been looking a fair bit heavier than last time. "Perhaps you're right, but I won't let you get away without some tea, at least. Come and sit. Please."
A few minutes later, she was carefully setting a steaming up aside, staring back at the two girls with frightened eyes.
"I knew I wasn't mad. I knew there was something. I knew... Something is terribly wrong with my baby boy, isn't there?"
Aiko tried to speak and felt her tongue freeze, logic and emotion suddenly at war within her. I can't lie to this person. I can't. She's so kind. All I can do is omit facts that would lead to further questions about things she has no way of understanding.
"I... think so too, Mrs. Rosea."
Sensing Mira's assent as well, she looked at them with renewed gratitude, finally sensing someone that she could share her private doubts with. Someone who would understand.
"I was overjoyed initially, of course. My poor lost son finally returned to us, after being gone for days when mysterious disappearances have been the local story for months now. Who wouldn't be happy?"
"Everyone at school was glad to see him return, Mrs. Rosea", Mira offered.
But Hirata Rosea regarded her with a wry smile. "Now, now. There's no need to embellish. I know myself that he's not the most popular person at school... and not because he's a 'hafu' like he seems to think. No. I would imagine the staff, and especially the principal, were overjoyed. No more pressure to hurry up and find the missing students, now that two of them came back." Here she nodded back towards Mira.
"What exactly happened to you, dear? You left for several days, then returned, just as he did."
Mira frowned, brow furrowing. Like Aiko, she disliked having to lie. Every word she had said to the police had been the truth. They had just chosen not to believe it.
"I went on a... a journey. I had time to think about some things, and then I decided to come back."
She chose not to take offense at the vague allusions, leaning back and considering the meaning. "My boy, my baby, my Jiachi... He has changed as well. If he took that time to 'think about things' as you did, then it's changed him for the worse. I've never seen such a massive change in anyone before. He tries to hide it, but... Mothers always know."
Mothers always know. Those words so close to the heart made Aiko stiffen up, but she recovered quickly. "That's why we came to visit you, Mrs. Rosea."
Which wasn't completely true either. Knowing just how distraught Julian's parents must have been after comprehending that their son's return was a mere illusion to placate curious minds, they had avoided coming here until there were no other leads left.
Tenri had been only mildly helpful, offering information about Julian's behavior in sports and how it related to him never being allowed onto teams. Serizawa, the housekeeper, had been on vacation after the horror of witnessing one of her charges die in front of her.
Which left the parents, the people who knew Julian the best of all. "Is Mr. Rosea at home?", she asked.
The woman became grave. "No. He's working overtime. Trying to avoid Jiachi as much as possible, so he can convince himself that everything's back to normal and our son really has returned to us."
They could both practically taste her despair, her feeling as though their family was falling apart with nothing she could do to prevent it.
"Do you blame him?", Aiko asked carefully.
"No." She shook her head, eyes focused into the floor now. "Not for that, at least. I feel that urge as well. That if I just stop thinking about it for a while, everything will be better." Forcing a heavy head back up, she looked back. "I love Akusa Rosea. I vowed to always remain at his side, no matter what tragedy strikes. I just wish he understood that Jiachi needs his father after losing his grandfather."
The two shared an unease glance, knowing already that the truth was more complicated than that after seeing Mr. Rosea in person.
"Jiachi-kun seemed to like his grandfather more than his father."
Light from the window reflecting off auburn hair, Mrs. Rosea brightened then froze, as if she wanted to laugh but had forgotten how. "Oh yes. That's been the way of things for many years now, ever since they gained citizenship here. As you probably know, they emigrated to Japan shortly after Jiachi was born."
"Right", Aiko echoed, trying to sound like they had been expecting that answer. "It's easy to spot the signs. Akusa and Gentaro are American-born, right?"
"Yes." They both sensed the emotional crack then, long-held secrets pouring forth. Never mind Julian's Shadow; if Mr. Rosea came home from work a bit early, they were going to be in so much trouble... Steady, Aiko commanded herself. Whatever has to be done to save him, we will do.
"We met there, and we were married. I was willing to stay there in his country if he wanted, but he wanted to go live with me in my home country, in Japan. He said that he liked it better, against Gentaro's wishes. Said that he didn't want to do anything that would make me uncomfortable." She shrugged helplessly. "The love and consideration that I show to him is the equal to what he shows me. I only wish that he could pass those feelings on to our son."
Taking a long drag of the tea, she pried her hair back, eyes nearly shut so they wouldn't have to see their reactions to the words. "He... legally changed his name for me. He was once Adam Rosea. He changed his father's name too, from George to Gentaro. And of course, Jiachi..."
"Prefers to be called Julian", Mira finished understandingly.
"Yes. But my love was insistent. It was all that I could do to stop him from changing their family name as well. That's the rift between them. I know it."
"Changing his name?", Aiko wondered.
"And everything else", Mrs. Rosea confirmed sadly. "I never asked him for any of it. But Anata was so afraid. He didn't want us to stand out. 'The nail that sticks up gets hammered down', he would say. He forbade our son from ever learning English. Forbade him from even watching or reading anything in any language except for ours. He wanted Jiachi to dye his hair black as well- so he could fit in better, you see- but relented when Jiachi threw a tantrum about it."
She shuddered. "I still remember hearing them argue into the night about it. It hurt me more than I can say. And as Shido and JCAP began to rise in power, his fear only became worse, the strain between them greater."
The two visitors shared an alarmed look, assorted sights from the other world suddenly sliding into place.
"I felt it", Mrs. Rosea continued, more distressed now. "I always tried to stop it. I kept asking them both privately to drop the issue... But that's one thing neither one of them would ever yield on. Of all the traits to inherit from his father, he just had to get his stubbornness."
In the current dim lighting and broad clouds outside, it was all too easy for Aiko to imagine the tense atmosphere that could grip this house when it was subjected to an argument between family, like a pall of acid. Mr. Rosea demanding that Julian do more things to bury the other half of his heritage. Julian fighting back against what he no doubt saw as unfair restrictions on his behavior and language. And Mrs. Rosea reaching out to them both separately, trying to defuse the issue on both sides. Failing.
Reading her pensiveness easily, the woman nodded. "Yes. It led to more than one shouting match between them. Another thing that Anata greatly appreciates; the general rule that children should be respectful and obedient to their parents. Not that that's something unique to our nation of course."
Automatically flashing back to the sight and sound of her own mother, Aiko frowned. "Children should respect and honor their parents... Unless the parent doesn't respect them."
"I have told him as much", Mrs. Rosea agreed with a polite nod, reminding her that they were already deep into some very private territory for the Rosea family. "Unfortunately, nothing I say makes a difference in this. Without Gentaro, they have been far worse."
"Why does that make a difference?", Mira asked with genuine interest.
A look of warning passed from Mrs. Rosea's wizened eyes then, raising the question if perhaps they had finally gone to far. Family matters were exactly that; family. Mr. Rosea would naturally be upset that she had shared so much with two relative strangers already.
"Please forgive me, Mrs. Rosea", Mira blurted, bowing. "We didn't mean to pry."
"It's alright", she assured them, smiling sadly. "You are Sorano-san, yes? Jiachi spoke of you as well. I can tell that you two are only trying to find a way to save my son. Or rather, to cure him of whatever has happened to him during his disappearance."
"Yes", she confessed weakly, trying to hide the pain on her face with the tea mug. It physically hurt her heart to not be able to tell the full truth. "We're really worried about him, Mrs. Rosea."
"Anata won't like it... But it feels good for me to be able to share all this with someone who cares", Mrs. Rosea returned, arms clasped in anxiety. "And it's nice to see that my Jiachi has such devoted friends at school. For a long time, he had none."
Sagging back, she laid the empty mug on her stomach, and Aiko drew back in shock. Mrs. Rosea had been lounging sedately in her chair for most of their talk, and for that time she had assumed the woman had been wearing a loose-fitting blue dress, and that was the reason why she looked a fair bit rounder than she remembered from their previous visit. She'd assumed the woman to be merely emotionally exhausted.
The truth, or at least her best estimation of it, nearly made her fall over, her surprise impossible to hide. At least, not from Mrs. Rosea's perceptive eyes.
"Y-you...?"
One hand raised to stabilize the cup, the other rubbing the round belly beneath it, she regarded them both with the heaviness which had trapped her in her chair for hours on end, watching old movies of happier times. "Now, do you understand? I want my Jiachi to be a good, well-adjusted person. It doesn't matter to me if he is Jiachi or Julian, whether he speaks Japanese or English. I still love him, no matter what. What I don't want- what I would share a few secrets with anyone to prevent- is to have to some day explain the reason why he ran away from our home or why he denounced our family... to his brother."
5/23 Thursday
Lunch
The living Shadow of Julian Rosea didn't need to force a smile onto his face as he made his way out of grumpy Mr. Noriyama's classroom and into the 2nd floor hallway at Koashimizu academy. He had plenty of things to be happy about without forcing it.
Wherever he passed by, students stopped and stared. They pointed and talked to each other in hushed nervous tones. Even the most reserved teacher or staff member would pause for a moment and take note of him as he passed by, no doubt wondering what had happened to him during his absence that could change him so.
They were giving him everything that he had ever wanted.
The more they talked, the more they made their wild conjectures and theories, the better he felt. In his more reflective moments, he considered himself a rising star. A supernova of public attention, fed by the awe and curiosity of those around him and growing larger all the time. Even Benihime Kujou, the stuck-up queen bee herself, had to take notice of him now.
And why not? His own observations about the world around him had been drawn by his 'original' long ago, but he'd lacked the strength to ever truly embrace them and see the real truth for himself. His Shadow knew the truth, and here it was demonstrated before his very eyes in hundreds of living, breathing examples...
That this school, this country, this entire damned world, was dead, or nearly so. It lacked the spark of life that he held. From the moment that their children were brought into the world, their tamed parents set to work crushing the free spirit and ambition out of them, teaching them the ancient, outdated forms of courtesy that had no place anywhere except for the sterile, carefully-constructed environment called 'civilization'.
Nowhere was that fact more obvious than here, in an academy where so many adolescent girls and boys were put together and dull, boring, repetitive material was thrown at them by aging teachers, all but encouraging them to look to other places... such as each other.
But this so-called 'free society' had also done a fine job in setting its hooks in and extracting the pride and self-confidence of the majority of the students here, leaving them all too self-conscious to ever be fully open about what they really wanted from each other. When someone truly free like him came along, he would inevitably stand out in a big way, and become the topic of conversation once again.
It felt absolutely fucking amazing. Electrifying sensation filling him from head to toe, as if every single tiny voice whispering about him was a jolt of caffeine, whether he was around to hear it or not.
There were still some minor annoyances, of course. It irritated him to no end that he couldn't help but dwell on them instead of being able to dedicate all of his focus to simply glorying in all the attention that he was getting, but there it was.
He could not have complete freedom just yet. He still had to at least pretend to be the weak, pathetic human they all knew, at least for another few days.
Whenever people called him 'Jiachi', threatening them produced better results than usual, but being unable to carry through on the threats rankled. He would have given so much to be able to simply bash their heads in with his strength, and then watch those bastards who dared to insult him bleed all over the floor while everyone else panicked and screamed like the pathetic, useless, worms that they were...
But no. No, that would not do at all. Not yet, at least. He had to stick to the plan for now, had to continue to pretend to be that insufferably meek little high school hafu boy... for now. Only for now.
Then, there was the other problem. The problem of that girl. Aiko Tsuruga, the one who knew his true nature. The one who had so charmed his 'other' with delusions of adequacy, and so of course had earned a place in the Shadow's mind as well. It was such a shame that she wasn't willing to play along, and was no doubt even now trying frantically to figure out how exactly to fight back against him. Trying in vain.
Why wouldn't she just give up? She'd been to both worlds, her and her little trio of idiots. She had to know it was impossible to stop him now, and yet she refused to yield.
When she was angry, when she was defiant... she reminded him of a common Shadow type from Faraway Lands, and one that he'd worked hard to keep out of his Land. Those annoying, mischievous little winged Fairies that never knew when to leave something alone. She even had what the humans referred to as a 'pixie cut'. Pretty, fair-haired, fiery little Tsuruga-chan...
She would have to be his first conquest once he was truly free. A celebration of his victory. With his strength, far superior to any human's, it would be so easy for him to force her down to her knees and teach her proper respect for her earlier insults to him.
Seeing the frightened look in her eyes when he did that, watching her accept the inevitable and finally give in to him would be a triumph that was well worth waiting a few days for.
That other girl who had been with her, that Mirambela Sorano, wasn't even a factor. He'd seen the fear in her brown eyes earlier. Despite growing up in a less secure society, she remained a weak, useless worm pretending just for a moment to be strong for the sake of her pixie friend. He already knew that without Tsuruga backing her up, Sorano really was nothing but a whimpering little bitch.
Then there was the other one who had been stalking him, the one who dared call himself a 'genius'; short, brush-headed Shukiji Niyoga. The change in 'Julian Rosea' had not gone unknown by Koashimizu's so-called top student, and his cajoling attempts to learn the truth had been laughable. For someone so smart, he knows absolutely nothing about the world beyond.
After I am free, I'll give him the enlightenment that he so craves.
Sadly, all of that wonderful enjoyment would have remain in his dreams for the time being. But not for much longer. A few more days. A week, tops. Then the tide at the Yume Bay would go out and return to normal, and his 'other' would be gone from this world. Forever.
Until then, he had to be patient and try to take pleasure in the smaller things in life, like the miasma of gossip swirling about him, and the teachers' blank, unknowing stares, and the outpouring of sympathy for a boy who ran away from home after a heartbreaking bereavement only to return.
There was that damn annoying bird who kept following him around wherever he went, but it wasn't like it could actually stop him if he decided to have a little fun. Perhaps if he went to the city, found some blind alley where no one would see, he could lure the feather bag in close, and then...
Another arrival cut into his thoughts before he could construct a viable plan for dealing with the winged pest. The woman was young, but nowhere near a student's age, more likely a teacher's.
She seemed to be composed of as many different shades of blue on the spectrum as possible- stringy blue hair running down her wide, bony shoulders, a darker blue dress vest making her look even more adult, and crystal earrings a lighter shade. Even her eyes seemed to have a bit of blue in them as they zeroed in on him.
"Ah, there you are. You've caused quite a commotion, Mr. Rosea. I hope it was worth it."
What is this now? He didn't recognize this teacher. Some municipal agent, maybe? Trying to learn the real truth about the disappearances, just like Niyoga?
He knew better than to let any of this confusion show outwardly, however. His face kept the same confident, happy grin pasted on like it was his default expression. "Hey, I said I was sorry to everyone. My folks were okay with it, why can't you be? Sometimes a guy just to go and be free, y'know?"
Looking as rigid as Ms. Mattora, she regarded him without any of the awe he'd created in the student body. It annoyed him. She should know better than to annoy him.
"Jiachi Rosea", she observed clinically. "Son of Akusa and Hirata Rosea. You are him, aren't you?"
He snickered. "Duh. Wow, they really must pay you a lot to make deductions like that. So who are you, then?" Not that it matters in the end. By the end of the week, you'll be another 'tragic disappearance' for fucking with me.
The fancy-dressed woman seemed to have read his thoughts, and found them amusing. "My name is Cecille Yumika. I work as a teacher at Shiritsu Junior high, in the north end of the city. And yes, I am related to that Yumika. So consider that carefully before you answer."
Pulling rank. Hilarious. Maybe the 'other' Julian Rosea might have been scared by this and gone with her in submission, unreasonably frightened of their Principal's wrath. Me? I'll do it for fun. I'll learn all I can so it'll be easier to find her later.
"Ooh, a fellow celebrity", he remarked with as much sarcasm as he could possibly inject into his voice. "Guess I'd better be careful then. Lead the way, ice lady."
The trip took longer than expected, Cecille leading him all the way out of the main school building and into an outdoor area full of tall grass closer to the cliffs. From here, you could see the colorful line of fishing ships that used the coast as a mooring point between trips, trying to avoid paying the high docking fees that the wharf charged, but at the risk of accidentally beaching their ship if they weren't careful and skilled.
From here, I could throw this dumb bitch into the sea and watch her drown... no, have to wait for now. Tsuruga pays first, then this one will. Have to remember to prioritize.
Checking one last time to make sure they were alone, Cecille returned her gaze to him. "You must have had quite a time of it, Mr. Rosea. With so many police searching for you, you must have gone on a trip out into the countryside of Kochi."
He shrugged easily. He hadn't bothered putting too much effort into a cover story, because aside from Tsuruga and Sorano, no one would ever guess the truth. "Hey, like I said, I just had to go and be free for a while. I suppose that's a crime now?"
"In this circumstance, yes, it is", Cecille advised him, cold as the sea's wind. "Truancy, for starters. I'm surprised that Principal Yumika even allowed you back at school after such a long absence. Maybe he took pity on you for some reason. He does that."
"Teachers", he grumbled, turning to face the sun, the seed of the portal which he had emerged from. "More like screechers. You just can't leave me alone, can you? Can't let a guy have his fun?"
She smiled sweetly at him. It was the sickening kind of sweet, the jaws of an unexpected sugar rush from trying out a new type of candy. "I might, if you were a 'guy'. But you're not, are you?"
His eyes flew open hearing that, wide enough that he could see just a trace of acrid yellow reflected back in hers. He'd suddenly gone cold, in dire need of a thicker sweater even in the sporadic heat of summer's advent. "You... you know?"
Cecille raised her eyes to the sky as if the answer were obvious. "Shadow. Yes, I know. Your eyes are kind of a giveaway. What I don't know is how exactly how you got here, into our world. Care to share?"
He needed a moment to process that, but once he did he laughed once more, his confidence returning. All worried over nothing.
"Heh. Sorry. Trade secret. While it's... interesting to see just how many humans seem to know about our world, that doesn't mean shit if you can't do anything about it, right? Checkmate, ice lady."
Cecille didn't seem bothered by his attitude. She was focused on the rest of him, dark lips pursed in concentration. "You do seem a bit different from the Shadows that I remember, but I'll never forget the feel of that aura. I'd invite you back to your home so I can kick your ass myself, but I somehow doubt it'll be that easy to trick you into heading back where you came from."
Surprised for the second time in as many minutes, the Shadow sized her up again, looking for some kind of secret weapon to justify such boasting. Nothing I can see. Maybe she really is just that confident. Such a refreshing change from all the spineless weaklings I've had to deal with in this world. If she wasn't so keen on messing with me, I think I'd like her.
"Heh. Gotta say, I like you better than your bro, lady", he leered back. "But I don't think you have any idea of what I'm like back home. I'd tear you apart here as well, but I've got some business to finish first."
The woman blinked once in surprise, but then gave a predatory smile. "So it would mess up your plans, then, to be locked up in jail?"
Quickly as a light burning out, his previous fondness for her brazenness transformed back into blazing fury, and he scowled, trying to scare her off. "Bullshit. I'd just bust out in no time. You can't stop me."
"Probably", Cecille agreed sagely. "But then you'd blow your cover, wouldn't you? I'm not quite sure what's going on here, but I do know that you're deliberately pretending to be your true self in order to stop people searching for him."
That escalated the Shadow's scowl into barely-restrained rage, only her earlier threat preventing him from acting. "My 'true self'? I am the true self, ice lady. I'm the very best self!"
"Or at least, the most delusional self."
Fists clenching and unclenching with his standard dexterity, he glared back into resolutely frozen blue eyes, not comprehending. "Look... What the hell is wrong with you? You have a death wish or something, lady? Don't you realize that I could rip your head off right here?!"
"You could", she acknowledged, calmly stepping back. "But then you'd reveal yourself. It doesn't seem like a hard choice to me. All I want from you is information. If you refuse to talk... then I have a number of ways to make your stay here very difficult for you, Shadow."
Clench, unclench. Breathe. There was no point to hiding his rage, or the desire to forget the consequences and simply kill. Just talk. It doesn't matter what she knows. No one will believe her, and she'll die screaming soon anyway. I'll make sure of it.
All the same, the act of admitting that she'd browbeaten him wasn't an easy thing. Not for this particular Shadow.
"Well? What's it going to be?"
"...What do you want to know?"
Gracious in triumph if nothing else, Cecille Yumika merely contented herself with a small, knowing smile. "Come with me. We can talk in some place more private than this. Some place indoors, where that annoying bird won't follow us."
The way the white saker falcon in question suddenly adjusted its slow glide across the campus area after hearing the woman's words confirmed what the Shadow had long suspected. Needing some kind of victory, he laughed mockingly at their would-be spy.
"Heh. So you noticed him too, eh? He's been bugging me ever since I got here, but he never gets close enough for me to get my hands on. Bastard."
"He won't bother you any more today", Cecille promised wryly, following his mocking gaze up at their unwanted guest. "We'll go to my apartment. It's nice and quiet there."
"Sounds good", he commented, already wondering if the home might just be quiet enough that one might be able to hide a dead body for a few days.
He would never get the chance to find out. Cecille had parked her car on a lot that was a fair distance away from the campus, and few other vehicles were sharing the space with her small Daihasu convertible- a pristine sky blue shade, naturally. Few cars, and no other humans visible... Except for one.
The young man waiting for them in the lot looked to be around Cecille's age and dressed just as conservatively in a dark green salaryman's outfit minus the tie, but judging from her reaction to seeing him it was easy even for the Shadow to tell that these two weren't allies.
The intruder's black hair had been styled into thin bangs running along the back of his head, each one of them dyed a different shade across the rainbow. More naturally-colored hair had begun to form a black fuzz on his chin and mouth area, and a metal earring shaped like a spiral hung from his left ear.
Julian had been considered a moderately handsome boy, and of course his Shadow had inherited his looks. This one looked to be a few steps above that, the grown-up version, and his bright, welcoming smile only seemed to accentuate it further as he leaned back against their car. "Hey there, Queen. It's been a long time."
The Shadow couldn't help but glory in seeing the woman who had inconvenienced him so much descend into her own quiet frustration at seeing the young human. It also helps that he's starting to remind me of me. Of course he's still not as awesome as me, but I appreciate the effort.
"Ryuken Samesaji", Cecille grunted out, already sensing her one chance slipping away. "I left that idiotic code name behind me long ago, and I hoped you'd do the same. Don't tell me you're still working for that old-"
"For Lady Scorpio, yeah", Samesaji nodded as if the matter were no consequence. "She told me that you'd try to interfere, try and take the Shadow before I could. It's a nice thing really, having someone like her to tip me off. If she hadn't, you might have gotten away with it."
"Hey now, I'm not anyone's trophy", Julian's Shadow piped up sourly.
"My apologies", Samesaji amended, giving him a slight bow and handing him a small gray card over Cecille's suddenly useless protests. Seeing him turn it over to try and decipher the message, he quickly elaborated: "It's not an interrogation like the one I'm sure that Queen Aquarius here was planning. It's an invitation."
"I already told you, don't use those stupid code name-"
"Invitation?", the Shadow cut her off, his interest piqued after everything else he'd had to put up with today. "Heh. What kind of invitation?"
"From Lady Scorpio", Samesaji explained casually, as if it were a trivial thing to be discussed at some kind of social gathering. "And from me. To you, my Shadowy friend, for you to come... to Karma."
Built with strife and insight, but it's not enough
I'll defeat and discreet your every move
A/N: I would like to point again, for the record, that the thoughts and ideas expressed in this story do not necessarily reflect my own. This is especially the case when it comes to Julian/Jiachi's Shadow!
Super long chapter for your enjoyment, and I hope some of the more M-rated scenes don't turn anyone off it.