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Get ready for a chapter to tug at your heartstrings:

- Simona

XX

"I'm sorry we can't get your medicine right now, little buddy," Darry said, pulling him in. "But we will." Darry wanted to remain in control - he really did - but he was scard about their situation and how sick his kid brother was becoming. He had no idea what to do next.

Darry took the thick blanket that was on the floor and pulled it over Pony to warm him, thanking his lucky stars that he had remembered to pack it.

Pony didn't say anything and the two of them just sat there in without a word for a little while. Pony and Darry were more alike then they realized - neither one was all that interested in hunting up some action, in the way that Soda always They were perfectly comfortable enjoying silences and taking in their surroundings without making a sound.

"Darry," Pony's voice came out of nowhere, slurred and a little bit spacey, "Remember that snowman with dad?"

Darry gave his brother a funny look. He was quiet for a moment as he thought about it.

"Pony, we made a snowman almost every year we had enough snow, didn't we?" he said wearily.

"Yea…" Pony said, sinking further into Darry's chest with fatigue. "But I'm talking about that tme two years ago. Soda reminded me about it today. I was...12? You were a senior...The same year you had all those football games. It was you...me and Dad...Johnny...we were trying to collect whatever snow we could to make a big snowman...Mom came out with hot chocolate..." Pony's voice tapered off with its own weariness and exhaustion. And also emotion. It was hard to talk about his parents.

Darry grinned, "Yeah, I remember, kiddo. You and Johnny worked so hard on that thing…" They hadn't really, Darry and his father had done their fair share of piling on the snow, helping the younger kids out…Johnny and Pony goofed around a lot, challenging each other to make the most perfectly rounded snowmen.

Pony shivered. Darry held on to him a little tighter.

"Yea...and then Soda had to start that snowball fight," Pony's voice was a little more animated.

"Ah yeah…" Darry remembered, laughing, "He threw that snowball at Steve right? And missed!"

Soda could never spend a moment in the snow without starting some kind of competition.

"Yeah…" Pony said, licking his dry, cracked lips, "He accidentally hit Dally...and boy was Dally mad as hell. Enough to push Soda into our snowman!"

Darry laughed harder, a deep guttural sound.

"Oh yeah...you're right, little buddy. I completely forgot about that," he said, "You were so upset...And Dad couldn't stop laughing. He almost went after poor Dally himself."

Pony put his hands over his eyes. Why was it so bright out? It was like the snow was glaring at him. His headache was starting to come back and it was making him nauseous.

He thought of his Dad, laughing wildly as he watched Dally and Soda chase after each other, pulling Johnny into a spontaneous game of monkey in the middle. Darry had the same icy blue eyes that their Dad did - but Dad's were always dancing . Like Soda's. He remembered his mother languishing on the front stoop, asking who wanted hot chocolate - she always found a way to have Swiss Miss packets in the house, even when it wasn't cold out.

"D-Darry?" Pony stuttered, wondering how he would get the words out. "Do - do you miss them?" he asked softly.

Darry paused. "Miss who, Pone? Dally and Johnny? Of course I miss-"

"Mom and dad," he whispered.

Darry went cold. They didn't talk about Mom and Dad. At least, he couldn't remember the last time Pony had mentioned it. Not since the days after the accident happened.

This was something Pony talked about with Soda - not with him. How would he approach this?

Darry's voice was oddly gentle. "'Course I miss them, Pone." He reached out to stroke Pony's head, but Pony turned quickly, his eyes getting hot. He didn't want to tear up in front of Darry.

Darry seemed to be understanding though and Pony didn't know if it was because they had vowed to Soda that they would stop arguing not too long ago - or because he was sick.

Pony's tears came anyway - suddenly - before he had a chance to really stop him. He didn't have a handle on his emotions anyway with the fever and he was really too tired to lift a hand to wipe his eyes. Darry saw the tears and his breath hitched, his mouth opening slightly and his eyes going round. But just as quickly, he pulled Pony back so that his brother would look at him, and pushed the hair out of his eyes.

"Hey…"he murmured, wiping the tears under Pony's glassy eyes with his thumb. "It's ok to miss them, kiddo...it really is. It hasn't been that long since…" he trailed off.

He couldn't bring himself to say it, but Pony understood. Darry's eyes implored him to continue.

"It's not fair," Pony said, choking on his sobs, the muscles in his neck aching, his body trembling in Darry's arms. "Why...why do these things always happen to us? Don't we deserve a mom and dad too? Things will never be ok," he moaned, "It's not fair…"

"I know, baby, I know," Darry said, pulling Pony closer. Pony leaned heavily against his brother, feeling weak, like his own body was going to overwhelm him. "Life isn't fair. I know it's not. It's not ok. Things aren't always ok...But they will be..."

Life wasn't fair for a greaser on the East Side, even one that had the brains and grades of Pony. Or the emotional depth of Soda. Or the maturity of Darry. Darry Curtis didn't really know if it ever would be. But he couldn't let Pony think that. And especially not now in his present condition, in their current circumstances...

He didn't know where all this sadnesswas coming from - he didn't know if Pony had it all along, if it was looking to break free - or perhaps it was the fever and their current circumstances - that was just heightening everything.

Darry was happy that Pony couldn't see him, as his own eyes were starting to get red and he swiped at the tears that leaked from them haphazardly. He took a deep breath and hoped his voice wouldn't betray him to his brother.

"I know it's not easy," he said, as Pony's own tears fell. "But you have me here...you have Soda. We're here for you. We're not going to let anything happen to you," he said.

"Why do we always get the rough breaks?" Pony wailed, as more tears fell.

Darry's arms went tighter around him, as Pony began to cry a little harder. Darry could feel the sobs wracking his body. "Shh, it's ok, Pony...it's just a rough patch, that's all...just a rough patch," he soothed, rocking him and carding a hand through his hair.

Pony collapsed against his brother from mental and physical exhaustion. His arms tingled, there was a ringing in his ears,and his head felt heavy, like he wouldn't be able to lift it up much longer. The tears had certainly worn him out - and with Darry stroking the back of his head, he knew he wouldn't be able to keep his eyes open much longer. He tried to relax and get his breaths back, but he couldn't seem to shake the pain between his shoulders.

"I'm sorry," he murmured, his eyes closed.

"Nothing to be sorry about, Pone," Darry's voice said as if from a great distance, "It's just the fever talkin'."

Darry knew it wasn't only the fever, but he could probably guess that Pony, under distress because he was feeling bad, was letting his imagination get the best of him.

Darry felt guilty. He blamed himself for their predicament. If he hadn't insisted that Pony go to the doctor, despite warnings that incremental weather was on its way, he wouldn't be stuck with a baby brother who was running a high fever and getting more ill by the second.

Darry sat up a little higher, gently pulling Pony off his chest and having him lean back against the seat. Then he reached over his brother to grab the water that Pony had knocked to the floor of the cab. He thought for a moment, not sure if he wanted to let his little brother sleep or try to get him to drink something. He decided he would try to get him to drink.

Darry put his hand on Pony's shoulder and , "Pone?" he called out.

Pony's eyes fluttered open and he immediately cried out in pain, jerking away from Darry's touch.

"Ahhh!" he shouted with a noise that was somewhere between a moan and a cry. "Darry…" he looked at his brother blearily from the seat, "My neck...my neck hurts. Don't touch it," he mumbled.

"Your neck?" Darry asked, not even sure he was hearing correctly. He couldn't understand where this had come from."Your neck hurts?"

Pony, still half-asleep, reached up to gingerly touch the area. He was so worn out that his fingers only brushed the surface. Needless to say, the pain didn't subside. Darry let it go for the time being.

"Pony, here's your water," Darry said, shaking the bottle in front of the sleepy kid, "You should drink something."

Pony looked at the bottle through weary eyes, that were only the size of slits. "I'm not-" he licked his dry lips, "I'm not thirsty," he said.

"Not thirsty?" he asked, bewildered. Darry looked at the poor kid, who was obviously so out of it - but he didn't want to drink? It didn't make sense.

Darry didn't want to beg, so instead he commanded. "Drink something, Pone, you're burnin'." Do it for me please, he begged inwardly.

Darry uncapped the thermos so Pony could drink from it more easily, but was careful bringing it up to his lips so as not to spill all of the contents. "Pony?" he called, not wanting to touch his brother's neck and cause pain again. "Try to drink," Darry insisted.

Pony's eyes were closed, but Darry saw that he drank a tiny bit by the way he moved his jaw moved.

"That's it, Pone, try again," Darry coaxed. Pony moved his head forward slightly, but the throbbing pain in the back of his neck came back causing his eyes to pop open and his head to jerk back.

"I can't...I can't!" Pony whined, his eyes turning into tiny slits and he sounded like he was going to start bawling again. "I don't want to drink anymore," he said with finality. "I want to lay down." Pony slid down the seat so that he was lying curled up on his side, back curved, head bowed and limbs bent and drawn up to the torso. His right arm dangled above his head and off the seat. He reached up with his left hand and cupped it over his eyes as if he was trying to get rid of the outside world.

It was strange and Darry was alarmed. He hovered over his baby brother, patting his back over the sweater. By now Darry was really troubled. This kid's bad off, he thought. I've got to do something. We can't stay here anymore. He needs to be somewhere warm. With medicine. Maybe even a doctor. I need to do something.

Darry looked up and out the window at the heavily falling snow. It had calmed down some - but what it had left behind was intense. There must be more than a foot of snow out there already, Darry thought. I need to find help. We need to get out of here. If we don't...he looked at Pony, forcing himself to keep from finishing the thought.

And then, Darrel Shaynne Curtis, Jr. went back into control mode.

He decided that he was going to brave the heavy snow and find shelter, maybe find a payphone, maybe knock on someone's door. He checked his pockets for change. Maybe he would give Soda a call, see if there was something he could do. Maybe even Tim, if it would come to that. He knew time was running out. He had no idea if Pony would be fine here, but it would have to do.

He buttoned up his coat, checked his boots, and made sure his coat was zippered up tighter. He thought about taking the ski jacket - Pony would be in the car anyway - but he decided he wanted his brother to have it. Darry could handle the cold. He would have to.

He hated waking Pony up again, but he knew he needed his little brother to know where he was going. Pony was still laying on his side, he hadn't moved much, so Darry put a hand on his hip and shook gently. Then harder.

Then a third time. "Pone? Pony! Wake up, Ponyboy!" he said.

Pony didn't stir.