Unravel

by Homer's Disciple

Shinji rejected Instrumentality, but he made so many mistakes. He has one last chance to set things right, to unravel everything and save what matters. A retelling or altering of the series, an altered version of Shinji with an altered past. Life takes a different path, but do all paths lead to the same destination? Is Shinji doomed to never know happiness?

31. The World Waits For No One

Hey guys, long delays. I'm back.
I had a lot of issues with pacing and what to move around for this chapter. It deals a lot with our two Shinji(s)

Also, I have started an undertaking to fix all the grammatical errors in the previous and current chapters. I have not updated any of the chapters yet, and currently still going back to fix them one by one. It is a very time consuming process but one that I feel is needed. I don't have a beta reader and would prefer not to have one.

To 'Ben the Pen Man' I updated! Thanks for reading!

Anyway, here is chapter 31 'The World Waits For No One"

---

"You mustn't run away."

"I'm not-"

"You are. Thinking that it all go back to 'normal'. That you'll have the same life as before. But you won't"

"... and whose fault is that?!"

"Mine. Because it was needed.

The world waits for no one. They're always out there. Always coming. Run all you want, it solves nothing. I know that better than anyone."

- The Broken Man to Shinji Ikari.

---

Three days ago.
Moments before Shinji Ikari 'emerged' from the Entry Plug of Eva Unit 01. Released after two months spent absorbed into the Eva.

Kaji walked carefully through the lower levels of Nerv. Heartbeat steady in spite of all secrecy, getting down here had been a feat in and of itself.

The lower levels that were restricted even from him and Misato. Most Nerv employees were only vaguely aware that these floors existed at all. Kaji had only been able to get down with careful planning, and working around the opening created by all the new people moving throughout the Geofront.

All the construction work that had been needed to repair the hangar, to get the computer systems up and running again, to start repairing the Eva Units after their fight with Zeruel. So many things needed to be done, so many new openings in the security and protocol, a perfect opportunity for a spy to get what he needed and investigate under the cover of all the commotion.

With a swipe of the copy card he'd made, Kaji activated the heavy security door and watched as the reinforced metal swung open.

No cameras down here. Gendo's paranoid, afraid the footage could be hacked or stolen somehow. He's right. Kaji thought as slowly, he stepped forward.

Moving through the enormous room that he had spent weeks planning on how to get into. There was more down here than Kaji had realized. There were strange rooms, almost like a living space, but for who? Whom could have been living down here? All the halls had no cameras, just like the entire floor.

He walked into a chamber only to stumble slightly at the ghastly sight that met him...

An Angel was imprisoned in this chamber deep into the restricted levels of Nerv.

It had the form of a humanoid figure, with only it's upper half torso intact. The Angel lay crucified to a cross. Completely white save for its face. The Angel was massive in size, maybe as tall as Eva Unit 01 when it had been whole.

And holding it in place was a strange piece of red metal. Enormous, and with markings not of any language on earth, the 'recovered' Spear of Longinus lay piercing the Angel underneath Nerv. The blade, the tip of the Spear, missing the Angel's heart by several feet.

The Giant not killed, but imprisoned. Weakened.

Lilith. The Second Angel, source of Nerv's LCL ,and source of their samples for experimentation.

Oh Gendo. What were you thinking? What were any of you thinking? Kaji thought shaking his head at the sight of it all.

Thought to be lost or dead, the Second Angel was said to rival Adam. The supposed progenitor of life on earth. Vastly different than the other Angels depicted in the Dead Sea Scrolls. Said to be 'female' if Angels could even be said to have genders at all.

Adam and Lilith, the first and second Angels. SEELE and Nerv had lied to the whole world about the two of them being lost since the Second Impact.

Kaji raised his silent camera and began taking pictures. Another piece of the puzzle to add to his report. The spy took his pictures, cool and calm after his initial shock, only to pause... as Lilith's head moved ever so slightly.

The Second Angel tilted her massive head. Almost like Rei. The white faceplate hiding the Angel's face as the sharp movement rattled the cross behind her.

As if Lilith had reacted to something? To what? To Kaji? The spy froze, feeling his heartbeat rise as the Second Angel had moved.

Kaji thought he might have imagined it at first, but then it happened... Lilith stirred.

The Second Angel seemed to snap to attention. Head twisting with a crack as it faced upward. Beady almost non-existent eyes, barely visible through the faceplate, glued to the ceiling. Glued to what lay above in the upper levels of Nerv...

Kaji froze. Heart beating as loud as thunder. Not even daring to breathe, he stared open mouthed at the near god-like being.

Silence was his answer.

Whatever Nerv has done to Lilith... she can't act. She can't kill me or even attack, she can barely move... the Spear keeps her in check. I'm safe... but why the reaction? Kaji thought darkly.

"WEEEOOOEEE"

"WEEEOOOEEE"

The sound of an alarm ringed off from the upper levels. Kaji cursed, and turned from Nerv's secret imprisoned below and left the chamber. Closing the door behind him carefully, using gloves as to not leave any fingerprints behind.

Kaji hurried back the way he had came. Driven back by whatever was happening above.

…

Upper levels of Nerv.
Near the Hangar

Kaji wandered the halls, acting as if he'd fallen asleep in his office before the alarm woke him. He played up his tired expression and lazily wandered until he spotted a medical team rushing through the area.

"Hey. What's going on?" Kaji called, brushing past another Nerv employee. A nervous looking man whom had been headed towards the hangar.

The man blinked at Kaji as if in shock.

"Uh... they're saying that the Third Child is emerging from the Entry Plug" the man stammered. More surprised than scared or shocked. The impossible made possible.

"What?" Kaji said breathless. Losing his cool for once at the prospect of him returning.

Nearly two months the boy had been absorbed into the Eva... before Kaji would have thought that Shinji was a goner after all that. But now... but now Kaji knew more. He should have seen it coming.

The employee left Kaji standing there in the hall. Others wandered about, some of them answering Ritsuko's call for a med team, other just in shock.

Kaji made his way to the hanger, face blank and expressionless.

---

It wasn't what he expected at all.

Shinji Ikari had returned from his Eva mostly intact, but mute.

Kaji watched the boy from a distance. Arms crossed and with a cigarette in his mouth, coolly observing the scene that had halted everyone in the hangar. The naked boy sobbing silently in the arms of Misato, as Ritsuko and medical team watched in awe.

Red eyes. The boy had come back with red eyes.

Watched by SEELE for years, made into a pilot by Nerv, given 'fake' medicine, records falsified, and absorbed into the Eva for two months. Highest recorded Sync Ratio. And now this Kaji thought darkly.

Misato was doing her best to cover the boy up. Using her jacket to protect his privacy, but Shinji didn't seem to care. He just knelt there mute and lost to the world. Crying silently in Misato's arms.

"What did you see... Shinji?" Kaji muttered under his breath.

Little did the spy know, Evangelion Unit 01 was watching him from its place among the launchpads. For whom would ever suspect than an Evangelion watched and listened to its surroundings. That there was an intelligence behind the massive machine and strange alien flesh... unnoticed by all. For the best way to hide was right out in the open.

From deep within Unit 01, unseen and completely hidden, the Broken Man tilted his head at Kaji.

…

The boy spent 3 days under quarantine at Nerv. Hidden away from the others, and protected from the military.

Throughout the quarantine period, Kaji noted that Shinji Ikari had almost no visitors. That Dr. Page had been spotted walking the halls one day, and that Ritsuko had taken off work citing illness.

Kaji didn't like seeing what the boy was becoming. He witnessed Shinji prove his strategic asset to both Nerv and the military, having already cleared the other tests, he watched the 14 year old boy walk as if he was lost to the world.

Watched as Shinji Ikari piloted not only Eva Unit 00, but Unit 02 as well. Achieving an operational sync with both of them. Comparing that to his earlier records with Units 01 and 03, that made the Third Child the first, and only, Universal Eva Pilot.

Kaji watched with cold eyes as Shinji was eventually released from Nerv's quarantine, free of the military's concerns over his risks.

The boy with an Angel in his head Kaji thought to himself coldly.

---

Present Day
Mari's apartment

"Hey, boy. Get up."

The words that had woken Shinji Ikari from his slumber. The 14 year old teenager lying in his girlfriend's bed, Mari beside him under the sheets.

Shinji opened his foreign red eyes, rising from Mari's bedsheets, slowly stretching his arms in the early morning, and careful not to wake his girlfriend up.

The boy nearly leaped from the bed at the sight that met him.

Him. The Broken Man stood in the room with them. Dressed in rags, tall, with wild greying hair and mixed colored hollow eyes. Beaten and battered skin, tiny scars littering the man's hands.

Young Shinji gasped at the sight of him. At Old Man Shinji standing a few feet from Mari's bed.

"Got your attention? Good. We need to talk. About the job only we can do." The Broken Man said, tilting his head at the boy, hollow eyes staring unblinking.

… you're not here. Not really. You can't be. Shinji thought distantly.

He scoffed as he met the old man's gaze with one of his own.

Shinji slipped out from underneath his girlfriend's bedsheets, reaching for his clothes even as the Broken Man tilted his head at him.

"I'm not really here. My 'real' body is still inside Unit 01. This is a mental projection, only you can see me and-" The Broken Man said dryly. Only to stop as Shinji interrupted the Elder.

"Whatever" Shinji said dismissively, the boy pulling his pants over his boxer briefs. Mari breathed out softly, turning in her bed.

The Broken Man glanced her way, before turning back to Young Shinji. Only to see the boy moving on as he looked for his shirt.

"Your shirt is out in the hall." Old Man Shinji said, voice empty and flat. Tired.

Young Shinji stilled at that, before moving on wordlessly.

Old Shinji 'trailed' after the boy. Walking beside him as he moved through Mari's apartment.

"Listen, your brain couldn't 'handle' this projection before. But it can now. It will make it easier for-"

"I don't care" the boy cut in again. Nonetheless Young Shinji took his Elder's advice and spotted his shirt out in the hall where he'd thrown it.

SKIRT

Young Shinji stumbled in the hall... as the Broken Man materialized inches in front of him. Standing taller than him, still as a statue.

I exist inside your head. You cannot ignore me. The voice in Shinji's head spoke. The voice of the Broken Man speaking to him directly via thought and thought alone.

It was an uncomfortable sensation, but it no longer hurt Young Shinji.

"Watch me" Young Shinji spat.

Then the boy walked straight through the projection of Old Man Shinji. The image of the Broken Man rippling as the boy brushed past him.

"Boy" the old man called.

Just as before, the projection of the Broken Man materialized in front of Young Shinji. The ragged old man shaking his head in a flicker of annoyance.

Young Shinji shook his head in a flicker of annoyance, mirroring the old man before him, and walked past his Elder again. Scooping up his shirt and pulling it on.

The Broken Man crossed his arms, the man's projected body lingering no matter how hard the boy tried to banish him away.

"Misato is worried. She's been trying to call you" the Broken Man called softly.

That got Young Shinji to stop for a moment. The boy unable to meet the Elder's gaze.

"I forgot" he whispered weakly. Misato... Misato had always been good to him. He really needed to be better to her.

"Liar. I've shared some my abilities with you. You have perfect memory now. So no, you didn't forget. You chose not to call her. You chose to ignore her." the Broken Man said simply.

Shinji checked his pant pockets for his phone and found the battery nearly dead, and six missed calls flashed across the display. All of them from Misato.

I didn't choose to ignore her. I- … I wanted time with my girlfriend Shinji thought. His eyes twitching as the perfect memory kicked in without him wanting it to.

...

Shinji could 'see' the events happening all over again, as if watching a film on repeat, perfect clarity, the flash of images. Him ignoring his phone in favor of his girlfriend.

The Broken Man telling him that Misato was calling.

Shinji replying that he'd deal with it later.

...

I'll have to apologize to Misato later. Shinji thought. The perfect memory fading.

He signed, and turned back to face the Broken Man coldly.

"Look. I appreciate the help with Dr. Page. Nerv would not have released me without your help. But go away. I'm trying to live my life, alright-" Shinji muttered, pocketing his phone.

"Do you think you can run away from this? Huh, boy? Hide with your little 'girlfriend' and screw all your problems away?" The Broken Man said darkly. Voice low yet forceful, he never yelled, but his voice carried weight all the same.

"... I'm not running away" Shinji spat angrily.

The room grew tense. Young Shinji's hands curling into fists slowly. The Broken Man watching him, unimpressed by the display.

Damn him... damn him and his stupid eyes... dead eyes the boy thought harshly.

"You are. Believe me, I know a lot about running way." the Old Man said roughly, voice low but not unsympathetic. Unblinking gaze never leaving the boy.

Shinji and Shinji. One seething and one tired.

"There are things more import than you getting laid, boy. I didn't come back so you could run off and have sex with your little girlfriend. I came back to-" the Broken Man said, eyes growing colder.

"Oh be quiet. I saw your fucking memories. I know!" Shinji spat, turning to face the mental projection of Old Man Shinji.

The 'two' of them standing out in Mari's hall.

Old Man Shinji glanced at the doorway to Mari's bedroom. His younger self was being far louder than he needed to be.

"And did you learn nothing? After all you've seen... you're still trying to fight me" the Broken Man whispered. More saddened than anything. In stark contrast to the young boy.

Shinji scoffed. Eying his future self, the projection of the man inside Eva Unit 01, the man just always had to butt in. To be high and mighty, trying to carve out a path that Shinji did not want.

I learned that my entire life has been planned for me. That no matter what... I always end up alone... at least that's what happened to you, old man Shinji thought bitterly.

At times, he almost felt bad for the Old Shinji, and other times he remembered all the seizures and visions in his life. He had been 'hijacked' into another man's life for over two months, seen everything, learned the truth, and even now this 'other man' meddled with his life.

Every time Young Shinji tried to be a teenager, to live his life with his girlfriend or friends, the Old Shinji meddled.

Old Shinji glanced down the hallway again, to the bedroom of the apartment, to where Mari was sleeping.

"I don't trust her." Old Man Shinji said darkly.

Young Shinji scoffed.

"Of course you'd say that. Anything that doesn't go according to your plan just has to go away." the 14 year old snapped.

"That's unfair, and you know it." the Broken Man said tilting his head back at Young Shinji.

"What's unfair is everyone thinking they know what's best for me" Young Shinji hissed darkly.

"Have you considered, that as I am you, that I actually do know what is 'best' for you" the Broken Man said harshly.

"Your life, old man. Not mine" Young Shinji countered.

The Elder shook his head at it all. The boy wanted to put his head in the sand, forget all his troubles and live his life. To 'recover' from the trauma of the memories, in a perfect world that would have been fair.

But that wasn't the world they lived in.

"The world will not wait for you, boy. I'd have thought you would have seen that by now" Old Shinji said softly.

Young Shinji looked away.

SEELE, this looming presence that had been a part of his life for over five years now. Perhaps even longer, intertwined with Shinji's life since the days of his parents. And he'd never even known. These people whom had brought the wrath of the Angels upon earth and mankind. They whom had caused Second Impact, all for their stupid plans.

All for their precious instrumentality, for their fear of death.

"SEELE is working toward the Third Impact. Gendo is working on his madness. And Adam's Children are still out there. Always moving, they wait for no one." The Broken Man said darkly, shaking his head at the boy.

Shinji felt his hands clench into fists. Biting his lip.

I know what's coming. I've seen it... the End of the World. The red seas, the grey skies, the white landscapes... the ashes...the boy thought darkly.

He did not want this, he hadn't even wanted to be an Eva pilot at all, but now here he was. Trapped in this life where he knew far more than he had ever wanted to. A part of things larger than himself, and not for the better.

"What would you have me do? Huh? I'm just a freaking kid." Shinji said through gritted teeth.

"Help me." Old Shinji pleaded.

Young Shinji looked at the floor, eyes distant.

"Together, we can stop that nightmare from happening. All of you can have a better world, a life that I never could" the Broken Man said.

The Old Man raised his hands, withered aged things, and with missing fingers that made Young Shinji wince. A reminder of what had come in another life. One pleading with the other, future and past standing together.

Young Shinji didn't know if he wanted to believe the Broken Man. He trembled slightly, before steeling himself up.

"Why bother? You'll just take over my body again. Send me somewhere else so I don't notice. Then do whatever the hell you want. Talk to people, make plans, whatever. That's what you want, right? To steal my life?!" Shinji spat.

The Broken Man narrowed his eyes. Very calm and controlled anger flashing by, the first and only time Shinji had ever seen it. The anger of Old Man Shinji.

…

The Other Place
The bridge between the two Shinji(s)

Shinji blinked as Mari's apartment vanished. One second he was standing in the hallway, mostly dressed, and then the next he was standing in the void again.

Standing with the Original Shinji Ikari in front of him. And the furry was terrifying to behold...

"I did not come back to steal your life, boy. I did not claw my way out of hell to make you miserable or to suffer! I came back to fix it all! So you would have better! To give you a chance." The Broken Man said. Actually getting angry, truly angry, for the first time in years.

The first and only time Shinji had ever seen the man truly shout or yell.

The Broken Man's skin lit up. Pure white light seeming to flash by... no from underneath the old man's skin. His veins were glowing, creating a strange flickering within his body that illuminated his skeleton.

Fractured and dented bones visible to Young Shinji's naked eye, scars upon scars revealed, and... and more.

The outline of a Giant of Light looming over Old Man Shinji. The outline of Adam the First Angel, shimmering around the fury of the Broken Man. As if the old man was encased in the armor of an Angel the size of an Evangelion.

Young Shinji stumbled back in the Other Place.

It's... its insane! The remnants of a dead Angel inside his body... the power that was stolen the boy thought. Young Shinji stood opened mouthed at it.

"I HAVE GIVEN SO MUCH FOR YOU. YOU- YOU UNGRATEFUL BOY! IF I HAD WANTED TO STEAL YOUR LIFE, I WOULD HAVE! DO YOU REALLY THINK THAT I COULDN'T DO IT? ME, THE MAN WHOM KILLED ADAM? THAT YOU COULD HAVE STOPPED ME?" the Old Shinji spoke.

Only the man's voice was gone. In its place stood the roar of an eternal star, a voice that made Young Shinji wince, a sound that made the boy's ear feel like they were bleeding.

Like an Angel... like Old Shinji was no longer human.

Young Shinji stumbled back. Nearly falling. Legs feeling like water. Shaking in awe of the Abomination walking towards him. The shinning silhouette of Adam looming over both of them...

Then the Broken Man stopped. He stopped. Eyes lost. Mouth open as if to speak, but the words had not come out.

"NO. THIS IS WRONG. THIS IS... this isn't me" Old Shinji said. His voice a crackling of thunder one moment, and barely a whisper the next. From Angel to Man.

Old Shinji breathed heavily, chest contorting in and out, closing his eyes as if deep in prayer. Meditation. A calming technique.

"That is not me. I'm not him. I am still a man, deep down. I have no tomorrow, but there is still hope for the future." the Broken Man whispered again and again.

Chanting softly to himself. Young Shinji momentarily forgotten.

The outline of the First Angel stirred. Seeming to shrink, the light fading, the figure looming above them slumping over.

Gone. The power of Adam dying down.

"Forgive me. You bring back my emotions... and that's not always a good thing" the Broken Man said. Breathing softly.

Recovering as he looked apologetically at Young Shinji. At what the boy had seen. The toll that the Unraveling was still taking on him. The toll that all of this took. The cost.

"I- what the hell was that thing?!" Young Shinji said. The boy getting to his feet slowly.

You know what it is. The old man's thoughts echoed across the boy's mind.

Abomination... that's what Zeruel called you Young Shinji thought darkly.

Nothing was free. Everything had a cost.

"I know you're angry. I am too. If I was better, then we wouldn't be here at all. But we are. And there's no running away from that" the Broken Man said sternly. Never denying his flaws.

Young Shinji was about to respond. When suddenly, he was thrown out of the Other Place

---

The Real World

Shinji blinked as he was brought back to Mari's apartment. His heartbeat slowing now that the power of Adam had faded. Now that the Broken Man had returned to normal.

Old Shinji stood across from him. The mental projection meeting his eyes directly. Before he turned his gaze for Shinji to follow.

'We have company' the Broken Man's gaze seemed to say. Then the image faded, the old man vanishing from Shinji's point of view.

Their conversation would have to wait until later.

"Shinji?" a voice called from the bedroom.

The boy looked up, managing to keep his calm, his entire shouting match with the Other having been silent. Only for him.

Mari was walking towards him, bedsheets draped around her naked form like a towel. The poor girl having woken to an empty bed, and the light on in her bathroom.

"Hey, Mari. Sorry. Did I wake you?" Shinji said, breathing softly and calming himself. Part of him still reeling from what he'd seen from the Broken Man.

"No, dummy. Just... yawn missed you. Rude to leave a girl in an empty bed" Mari said, jabbing him lazily in his arm.

Shinji smirked softly at that.

"Hey, why are you up so early? Should sleep in." Mari said, stretching her arms as she spoke.

"Wish I could. Misato's been calling. Probably worried sick. Promised I'd check in" Shinji explained.

Mari shook her head.

"Miss 'Mama Misato', you should just get emancipated. Easier that way. No adults getting in the way, on your own. Legal adult status for the most part" Mari said rolling her sleepy eyes at him.

Shinji shook his head sadly.

"Misato's not so bad. She cares about me, you know." he said simply.

His girlfriend patted him on the chest affectionately. He had a point and she knew it. Misato and Mari might not have gotten along, but she knew what Shinji's guardian meant to him. Better than most.

"I'll make us some breakfast. Are you hungry? I am" Shinji said, managing a teasing smile. The both of them knew he actually knew 'how' to cook instead of just sticking things in a microwave or toaster.

Mari beamed at him despite her tired eyes. It must have been hard for her, him missing for so long without any answers, and she nodded.

So Shinji went to her work in her kitchen. Managing to make the two of them a nice breakfast with what groceries Mari had had. The girl taking a shower first, and letting Shinji go next. They'd had their fun the night before, and whatever the Broken Man said... Shinji knew what he felt.

---

"Misato I- no... no I forgot. I was just at Mari's... no nothing happened. I'm 14, alright." Shinji was saying on the phone.

Mari was watching him with an amused expression. She raised a hand and mockingly made a talking gesture in response to Misato's voice on his cell phone.

Nothing happened? That's news to me Mari's smirk told him. Mischievous eyes beaming at him as he had to fight the urge to chuckle softly.

They were in the parking lot, heading for her bike after a long breakfast spent mostly in silence. They hadn't needed to talk much since the morning, she found it comfortable just having him around.

"Gah... Shinji you can't do this. Answer your phone when I call" Misato was saying on the other end.

"Sorry Misato. It won't happen again, I promise" Shinji answered back. Assuring his guardian that he would be home after school, for real this time, and that he'd be careful.

"So you said last time. Sigh. You're gonna be late to school." Misato said over the phone.

"Mari's giving me a ride. It'll be fine" Shinji answered simply.

"Don't look. We're being followed."

The sound almost caught Shinji off guard. Almost. But he'd gotten used to the strange interruptions by now, and the sudden emergence of his future self in such a way that only he could see him.

The Broken Man suddenly stood in the parking lot with Shinji and Mari. The old man walking into Shinji's line of sight, stern expression planted on his face.

You're crazy. No one is-

We're being followed. Plain car out there has the engine running but hasn't moved.

I- what?

The car is waiting for us to leave

"Just be sure to come home, immediately after school. Alright mister" Misato was saying on the phone.

"You got it" Shinji answered back on the phone.

The boy's face twitched slightly as the Broken Man pointed a hand towards Mari, a reminder that she was watching him too. Chatting to him as they walked.

"I'll get you there on time. Don't worry" Mari was saying.

"Thanks Mari, I really do appreciate it" Shinji answered with a smile.

Where is the car? He asked the Broken Man.

Look to your left. Three parking rows down. Be smooth, don't let him know that he's been caught spying on you

Ahhhh. On it.

Shinji found this odd. He had to keep the conversations up, speaking with Mari, as well as Misato on the phone, and the Broken Man's mental projection all at the same time.

The boy faked a yawn, taking the chance to stretch and get a look.

There was indeed a plain looking car three parking rows down from them. It had been turned on, but hadn't left its spot.

"Hop on" Mari said, oblivious to Shinji and the Broken Man's concern of their uninvited guest.

Shinji got the bike, hanging onto his girlfriend as she drove off.

…

Tokyo-03
On the way to school

Mari drove onward. Shinji looking at his girlfriend's rear view mirror as she drove. Watching with the help of the Broken Man.

He's still following us. Probably knows your school. Keeping tabs

The Old Shinji could see better than Young Shinji. Not exactly in a literal sense, but rather that the Elder seemed to process what his eyes showed much faster than the boy.

Maybe it's just a guy going to work Young Shinji thought back.

Check your memories. The car was following Misato yesterday the Broken Man answered from within Shinji's head.

Young Shinji closed his eyes. Reaching into the powers that had been given to him, it felt so strange, like flipping through a book that was his life. Able to see with perfect clarity the events from before.

…

Perfect Memory

Misato was talking to him. He was sitting in the passenger seat of her car, watching the construction crews in the distance as they worked to repair the damage Zeruel had done to the city.

Young Shinji focused, and found a moment where he'd been able to see the car mirror.

Watch the car. It's off to the side on the right lane the Broken Man told him.

Damn. It is the same car. What the hell?

What did you expect? You're a mystery to a lot of people

All because of you. Damn you.

We can't keep fighting like this, boy. was all the Old Shinji said.

Maybe it's normal. They probably kept an eye on the pilots before-

This is different. They kept their distance before, they never followed us like this. Hmm, could be Kaji, or Nerv, or even SEELE.

Kaji? What?!

He's a spy.

… how do you know that?! Huh? What if you're wrong?!

You realize that I am from the future? Trust me, we're being followed and this is different. The Broken Man answered softly.

"Hey, you alright?" Mari asked suddenly.

Shinji opened his eyes to find Mari glancing back his way.

They were stopped at a red light, her motorbike having come to a stop just as she noticed how quiet he was being. Shinji blinked awkwardly. This was so strange for him.

"Fine. Just a little tired." Shinji said. Playing it off with a easy shrug.

Mari smirked at him.

"Told you, should have stayed in bed" his girlfriend teased him.

"School is important" Shinji laughed.

"Goodie too shoes" Mari said with a coy smirk.

He rolled his eyes at her just as the light turned green. Mari laughed at him as he held on with a gulp, her motor bike zipping past the cars in traffic. Shinji tried to enjoy that moment with Mari, but it felt hollow somehow. The moment ruined by an uninvited guest.

A plain car driving closely behind them. Keeping a distance, but never losing them.

---

School

"Thanks for the ride. I should walk back to Misato's after, she's already mad at me." Shinji said with a sigh.

Mari pulled into the drive way, coming to a stop in order to drop him off.

"Yeah yeah, I figured." Mari said just as he slid off her bike.

"I'll come by later, when I can" Shinji said. He reached over suddenly, offering his girlfriend a warm embrace that startled the older girl.

"Shinji? I- … what's gotten into you?" Mari asked slowly, a slight hiccup in her voice as Shinji hugged her.

The 17 year old girl feeling a flash of warmth across her face. Shinji did that to her sometimes, she may been more physically experienced, but her boyfriend was better at 'this'. Warmth. Displays of affection, she found it... cute.

"Just missed you is all." Shinji said offering her another weak smile. He let her go and felt some small satisfaction that he actually made her of all people blush.

Mari seemed to consider that. Before smiling too, "you better come by later."

"I promise" Shinji said, just as his girlfriend started her motorbike. He watched her go, and waved her off as she drove out of the drive way.

It was only after she was gone that he noticed how empty the school was. Like there were less teachers, and that the place seemed quieter than before.

…

Shinji wasn't imagining things.

There were diffidently less people in school. Less teachers and students. And quiet. Some how much quieter than before.

Every now and then he spotted a few friends, small groups of fellow students, wandering the halls to get to class. But it wasn't the same.

When Shinji got to his class, he was four minutes late. Late just like Misato had told him he'd be. He'd missed a lot of school and Nerv had had to send papers excusing his long absence as a medical emergency.

The old professor scowled at him, staring at the red eyes, but let Shinji pass into his seat. Only Shinji found half the class was missing. The classroom stood as a ghost of its former self. Rows of seats empty with small cliches of friends sticking together in clusters.

Rei was gone. Off at Nerv for another test. Asuka sat with her friend Hikari, forming a row of occupied seats with some other girls.

Shinji walked past them, and was surprised when he noticed Asuka avoiding his gaze.

Asuka? He thought.

The red head didn't even look at him.

Shinji hurried his way past them. Looking for Ken and Toji, his only 'normal' friends in the madness that was his life... but found them gone.

The back seats where he had sat with them were empty. Shinji paused at that, before slowly taking his seat alone in the back.

His friends were gone. Even Rei. Shinji sat alone taking notes as the teacher droned on and on, frowning the whole time.

…

When they broke for lunch, Shinji found that he no idea where to sit. The place had plenty of room, it wasn't just his class that was missing students, it was the entire school.

More rows and rows of empty tables in the cafeteria and patio.

Shinji thought about sitting with Asuka, but decided not too. There was something going on with her and he didn't know what.

He sat alone again. Wondering where all his friends had gone. Two months where he'd been trapped in another man's memory. Away from his life.

---

After school.

The class room was filling out. Students leaving with their friends for after school clubs or else going home. Asuka leaving whilst Hikari stayed behind to help Shinji get back on track.

Missing so much school left him with a lot of catching up to do.

"It's a lot of work, but not as much as you think" Hikari was saying.

The class representative was going through all the work that he had missed. So much time away from school usually resulted in expulsion, but Eva Pilots were considered a special case.

"Thanks Hikari" Shinji said with another frown.

He took the stack of worksheets from her and fought the urge to sigh. At least she had stopped staring at his eyes, Mari had been the fastest to adapt to it. But others sometimes struggled with them. Hikari had known he was a pilot, and that he sometimes came to school with injuries just like Asuka and Rei, but this was different.

"I'm sorry, Shinji. Its the rules. Maybe... maybe Asuka can help you" Hikari said, earnest in her concern.

As if. Things with Asuka are just weird now. He thought.

"Yeah, maybe. Hey... Hikari- can I ask you something?" Shinji said suddenly.

The class representative blinked at him but nodded. The mature teenager seemed quieter than normal. It made Shinji uneasy. What was going on?

"What happened while I was- while I was away? Half the school is missing and... things are quieter" Shinji said. The boy deciding just to lay it out. He never really enjoyed school in and out itself, but he liked having friends and seeming them on a regular basis.

"I- you don't know?" Hikari asked. Frowning at him.

Shinji shook his head.

"The city closed all the schools for over a month. We've only been back in class for 2 weeks" Hikari said.

That made Shinji freeze. What? School was closed? He thought.

"With the last two Angel attacks... well there was a lot going on and school was suspended" the girl said. A slight edge to her voice.

Two Angel attacks... not just Zeruel and Leliel but the attack after them. The Beasts. Gah! I wasn't even around to help the last time! I should have been there for Asuka and Rei! Shinji thought.

The boy felt his hands forming into fists, before he stopped himself. He didn't want to make a scene with Hikari in the room. The Broken Man was sure to say something if he did, and he was sure the girl wanted to go home too.

Instead he breathed out heavily, saying "only 2 weeks? What happened?" Shinji avoiding Hikari's eyes, somehow feeling that things were his fault.

That he could have stopped Zeruel without the Broken Man's help, despite the fact that he failed in his first battle with that walking nightmare.

"The mayor announced that they were closing roads and highways for repair across the city. And we all got time off from school. People started to move, leaving the city, and well… I don't know… everything's changed since the last two attacks" Hikari said glumly.

She's scared. Hikari's not like the other kids, she sees it like an adult. How much damage Zeruel did to the city. People leaving the schools… what must it have been like for the civilians? Seeing the real wrath of an Angel Shinji thought darkly.

"-and Kensuke moved. His family just picked him up one day and unenrolled him. I'm sorry, I thought you knew." Hikari was saying.

Shinji blinked. Lost in his own thoughts for a moment.

"No. I didn't. What about Toij? Is he still here?" Shinji asked.

Hikari sighed.

"As far as I know. He hardly shows up to class anymore. I leave his worksheets with his family" Hikari said.

He's been missing school… I know where he'd be Shinji thought.

"Thanks for everything, Hikari" Shinji said somewhat awkward at how serious the conversation had turned.

The class representative smiled weakly at him, before turning to go. She had her studies to deal with. And Shinji thought she understood what the city had been through more than the other students.

This doesn't matter. School will always be here. But there are more important things for us. The Broken Man whispered.

Young Shinji scowled softly to himself. The first time the old man had spoken in hours.

Maybe to you. I'm still here, I have friends and-

I'm tired of arguing. Do what you're going to do. We'll talk later The Broken Man countered sternly.

Hey! I- ahhh…. He just always has to get the last word Young Shinji thought bitterly.

He shook his head and turned to go. Leaving the classroom with his stack of worksheets. He'd better drop them off at Misato's before he went out again.

Sorry Mari. I just want to see how Toji's doing. Shinji thought.

---

Hospital

Shinji walked the halls of the familiar building, red eyes searching for the right room number.

When he found what he was looking for, he knocked gently and was met with a slow response.

"Yeah?" Toij's voice called out.

"It's Shinji. Can I come in?" he called through the door.

There was another pause. Then the door opened and Toji was standing there in disbelief, watching as Shinji waved awkwardly.

"Damn. Shinji, the hell happened to you?" the teenager said.

"I was… away" Shinji started. But as he spoke he notice Toji stare at the 'new' red eyes that he had unfortunately come back with.

"Overexposure to LCL. Its a piloting thing. Don't worry about it" Shinji lied quickly, avoiding his friend's gaze.

However, Toji only shrugged and let him in the room. The boy didn't seem to care too much about Shinji's changes.

Kensuke would have been running wild with theories, taking pictures, and asking questions. Still, he had been one of the only 'normal' friends Shinji had at school. He hadn't even said goodbye. Well, Shinji hadn't seen either of his two friends as much lately. Having a girlfriend took time away from his regular friends.

"Am I interrupting. I can back later-"

"Nah. Was gonna leave already. Just saying goodbye" Toji answered with a backwards glance.

Toji took his seat by his sister in the hospital room. Shinji joining him in the spare seat.

Sakura Suzuhara lay in the hospital bed. Motionless but alive. Unconscious with various bits of medical equipment overseeing her well-being. The little girl that had been hurt during Shinji's first piloting run.

He once told me 'some paths cannot be altered'. Never realized how much that hurt until now Young Shinji thought darkly. Remembering what the Broken Man had said. Seeing the little girl that had been hurt in both timelines.

Knowing what happened in the other time… she probably never woke up. Maybe this time it would be different. Or at least Young Shinji liked to hope.

He felt like an intruder here, sitting beside Toji whilst the boy visited his sister. But Toji didn't seem to mind. He wasn't angry at Shinji anymore.

...

Together, the two boys left the girl to her bed. There was nothing they could do for her. He knew Toji had grown to accept that, but it must have been hard for him every time.

They ended up walking through that park Shinji had skipped school for all those months ago. When he'd first tried to help Toji's sister and found that he couldn't.

"You were gone awhile" Toji said breaking the silence. The two boys walking through the city park, passing what few people still came, by.

"Wish I hadn't. Really, I do." Shinji muttered.

Toji only shook his head, a quiet laugh under his breath. "I'm just messing with you. Mr. Eva pilot, I get it" he continued, patting Shinji on the shoulder in a friendly gesture.

Shinji appreciated it.

"Kensuke's gone. Damn. Never got to say goodbye" Shinji said shaking his head.

"He'll be alright. I talked to him on the phone the other day. He's in Tokyo-02. Family moved and everything." Toji said with a shrug.

I hope they'll be safe over there. Tokyo-02… looked pretty bad in that other time… gah! I gotta stop thinking about that crap. Young Shinji thought. Coming to halt without meaning too.

Toji paused, noticing Shinji had stopped.

"You okay?" the boy asked him with bemused expression.

Shinji shook his head slowly, assuring his friend. And feeling a slight tremor in his hand, one that he shrugged off without Toji noticing.

"Was it really that bad. The city? While I was away?" Shinji asked seriously.

Toji gave him odd look. Like he didn't understand why Shinji had to be so serious all the damn time.

"Forgot how much of an old man you could be" Toji muttered with an annoying smirk.

Shinji rolled his eyes… his 'new' ones anyway.

"I don't know, Shinji. All the adults got scared. Pulled their kids out of school and moved. Things have been quieter ever since… you know?" Toji answered.

"Yeah… I can see it" Shinji said.

Even the air in this place seemed different now. Not a literal pollution in the atmosphere, but the way people carried themselves. For the pilots and people at Nerv, 'this' didn't affect them as much. They'd known from day one just what the Angles were like. But the others hadn't.

"Not me though. My sister is here and we ain't leaving without her" Toji said surprisingly firm, a stern coldness in his eyes that Shinji wasn't sure if he liked.

"Damn Angels are a walking nightmare. Wish I could do more, but at least you can give them hell for the both us" Toji said. The boy giving Shinji a stern beam that he didn't feel he deserved.

Toji may have put on a brave face, but he was apparently skipping more and more school. Visiting his sister more often. Shinji guessed Toji was feeling less and less like a kid these days too.

This isn't right. He's just a kid. I'm a kid. Why shouldn't have to deal with this. Shinji thought darkly.

'Who ever said this world was fair? That it was right?' Young Shinji could almost hear the Broken Man whisper. That annoying voice that countered him and challenged his thoughts and beliefs.

But the words never came. No whisper. No voice. No lecture about how the two of them could change things. Could set things right. The Broken Man was silent.

"Yeah" Shinji said numbly. He couldn't give Toji what he wanted. Couldn't be the champion that fought the monsters. His heart just wasn't in it. But he could reassure his friend at least. Shinji didn't have that fire in him, but he could do his job.

Toji nodded at him. Seeming to understand.

Shinji wished he hadn't noticed it, but he did. That same car from before. The one in the distance, parked across the street from the park where he and Toji stood. Whomever was following him could be in the car, or else walking around unnoticed among the crowds of people.

There was no way to tell.

Still following me. Gendo's people? Maybe. Young Shinji thought darkly.

"Shinji?" Toji asked suddenly.

The other boy watching as Shinji's face fell. Before turning to look for what had happened.

"Nothing. Hey, uh you wanna hit the arcade? Got an hour or so before it gets dark" Shinji said. Brushing past the matter.

"… sure.. Been pretty bored with you and Ken gone." Toji said slowly, before seeming to brighten up at the thought. The civilian never realizing what had happened.

---

They played at the arcade for over an hour. Shinji remembering better days where he'd been with his friends and his girlfriend. It wasn't quite the same, but it was close. A time where he didn't have to be an Eva Pilot, where he didn't have to hear voices in his head, voices that were real, and where he could live his life.

Toji was better than him at almost everything. Except the fighting games, Mari had taught Shinji a thing or two and he was getting better.

He had fun. Yesterday he'd had time with his girlfriend, and today he'd had his friend Toji. Ken might have been gone, but at least it was something.

Yet the feeling of being watched never went away. Even at the arcade. A looming shadow. A reminder.

When the time came to head home, Toji and Shinji parted ways.

But he found that same car in the distance as they were leaving. Parked across from the arcade. If the Broken Man hadn't told Shinji what to look for, he would have never seen the car. But now that he knew what to look for, he couldn't 'not' see it.

It made Shinji angry more than anything. After everything he'd done and been through, and now he was being followed everywhere he went. Like he was some kind of freak the government or whomever was keeping tabs on.

...

Home

Misato's apartment was dirtier than he remembered.

He'd noticed it when he first dropped off his worksheets, but now that he got a better chance to look at it, he realized Misato was too busy to clean, and that Asuka probably didn't know how to.

Shinji went to work. Washing the stack of dishes in the sink, cleaning the breakfast table, and mopping the floor.

Asuka came in later and when Shinji waved at her, in the middle of cleaning the living room, she only stared at him.

"Hey..." was all Asuka said.

"… hey" Shinji answered.

She glanced at his red eyes, and Shinji felt himself wince. He never knew what sort of footing he stood on with Asuka. He knew that the Broken Man had been extremely close with his Asuka, to the point where he had called her 'sister'. Yet that didn't seem to be Young Shinji's path.

"I'm glad you're back" Asuka muttered under her breath. The girl having no doubt come from Hikari's place and forgetting that Shinji was coming back to the apartment tonight.

Shinji raised an eyebrow at that, about to say… something. He hadn't quite figured out the words yet, when Asuka just had to be Asuka.

"No one else knows how to cook or clean." the German girl said. Then before Shinji could add anything more, she walked off to her room.

Leaving Shinji standing there in his apron and cleaning supplies.

What did I do? Shinji thought.

---

He spent the next few days going about his business. Waking up and facing his reflection after showering. Everyday looking over the foreign red eyes that looked back at him in the mirror, eyes that felt alien. Not his. Shinji tried not to think about it. He never liked them.

He went to school, trying to get Toji to come too, it did his friend good to show up and not spend all his time at the hospital.

Rei hadn't showed up at school since he got back. Hikari saying that Nerv had pulled her out for 'test' after test. That made the Broken Man uneasy, and part of Shinji too. He missed his friend, but yet another part of him was afraid of talking to her. Too many memories stuck in his head.

After school, he'd usually go to Mari's place. They'd fool around or else go out, find something to do in the city or else just cruise around on her motorbike.

Mari filling him in on what she'd been doing since the last two attacks. How her Eva still wasn't operational, and how she found it insanely annoying that she couldn't pilot with them for now.

Yet no matter what Shinji did, no matter whom he was with, or where he spent his time, he... he found it hard to be happy. And he didn't know why.

The closest he come to it was with Mari. She had always helped him 'live in the moment', but there were times when even she couldn't help him.

And the men in black, or at least that's who Shinji assumed they were, were never far. The people whom followed him everywhere he went. Not just a security force that kept an eye on pilots, these people tagged along close. Always in the distance yet never far.

He could spot them drive by the school in the morning and after classes. Spot them when he was at the arcade with Toji, spot them in the parking lot of his girlfriend's apartment complex. It made him close Mari's windows and curtain's whenever he could.

Days spent like that. Never quite being happy.

...

What happened? Why is nothing like it used to be? He thought.

Shinji was sitting somewhere downtown, at some food place Mari had found, and saving their seat for them whilst she ordered. The teenager sat eyes downcast as he waited for his girlfriend to return.

'What happened' is that you know the truth now.

Young Shinji blinked.

At long last. The Broken Man had spoken. Time seemed to slow, the rest of the world coming out of focus whilst Shinji and his table came into focus. The mundane sounds filling the restaurant fading away, lowering to barely a whisper before that was gone too.

Young Shinji felt his hands curl into fists, and slowly, ever so slowly, he looked up. Straight ahead and across the table from him.

Old Shinji sat across from him. The mental projection of the Broken Man, this image that he could make the boy see in the real world.

He looked out of place here among the 'living', like a dead man walking, a corpse whose soul refused to leave body. Hollow empty eyes. Rough aged skin.

"You" Young Shinji said darkly.

"Me." the Broken Man whispered.

"... where the hell you have been?" Young Shinji asked through gritted teeth, crossing his arms.

"I was tired of arguing with you. I needed you to cool down. Both of us, actually."

"I'm not some mad bull"

"There are times you act like one. I'm not saying that I don't." the Elder countered the Younger.

Young Shinji looked around the restaurant. Seeing that time seemed to be moving differently. He was seeing at a higher rate than normal. Hyper focused. Everything seemed slower and clearer than he'd ever seen in his entire life. Even just looking around took 'longer' than normal. But what he saw was hyper focused and precise.

Red eyes... damn these red eyes... they're not mine. They're his! Young Shinji thought bitterly.

They weren't perfect. Shinji couldn't see bullets travel or anything, he wouldn't be dodging gunfire, he could just see to a higher degree than normal.

They are meant to help you. It gives you an idea of what an Angel sees. What Rei sees at her best. Its why she's more graceful. Mine are even better than hers. The Broken Man whispered into Shinji's mind.

"I never asked for them-"

"I never asked for any of this."

The two Shinji(s) sat at the booth. Both staring the other down. Young Shinji blinked first, he always did.

"We can't keep fighting. The world waits for no one. Its coming, its all coming Shinji. You've seen it." the Broken Man said darkly.

"I know. It lingers like- like ashes in my mouth. I can't enjoy things the way I used to. You took that away from me" Young Shinji said eyes downcast. More sad than angry.

The memories loomed over him, always looming, no matter where he was or what he did. And now things were all different.

Shinji had been 'happy' for a bit. A blissful period before Zeruel came. A time where he had friends and Mari, where he was more teenager than pilot. Now that was fading.

He was being followed everywhere he went. Kensuke was gone. He didn't know why Rei was missing so much school. Why she hadn't been in class for days now, and why she was being called away so much. The city was still recovering from the last two attacks. Asuka had trouble talking to him. The city felt empty at times, less full. Just like him.

But he still had Mari.

He glanced over to his girlfriend, smiling sadly at the sight of her impatiently tapping her foot as she waited in line to order.

The Broken Man only closed his eyes briefly. Maybe he felt guilty. Selfishly, Young Shinji hoped he did.

"We were never going to be normal, Shinji. Not with our life. Not with the parents we had." the Elder said.

"Don't talk about them. I'm tired of of hearing the truth. I get it… alright" Shinji said bitterly.

The Broken Man tilted his head at him wordlessly.

Young Shinji let out a heavy breath.

"They really are coming… aren't they. Those men whom follow me everywhere I go, always at a distance but never far. The Angels… my bastard of a dad… SEELE" Young Shinji said quietly.

Like a part of him didn't want to believe it. Like a part of him just wanted to forget. But he couldn't, he was an Eva Pilot and had been for months.

The Broken Man didn't answer. Just sat there and let his younger half sulk.

"Shouldn't be surprised. I'm an Eva Pilot, a kid who kills Angels. But before this, before Zeruel… it was different. I still felt like a kid… a messed up kid, a teenager, but a kid all the same" Young Shinji said.

"And now?" Old Shinji asked.

"… I don't know." Young Shinji whispered. Voice small and on edge.

Surprising himself at how raw he felt speaking about it. About what he was feeling since leaving the memories of the Original Shinji Ikari.

"It's gone. I'll never be that kid again. The one from before. You told me once that… that the memories would fade. But I don't think they will. I hate it, just as much as I hate you. But I- I..." Young Shinji said. Stammering over the words.

He looked away from the Broken Man, and glanced at his hands. All ten fingers intact where his Other had only eight.

"I think they're deeper than you thought. It's not my life, but you made me see so much. Too much. I can't unseen it, just like you said." Young Shinji said at last. Bitter.

School just isn't the same. Hanging out with my friends isn't the same. All my old problems… they seem so pointless now. Who cares about school when the end of the world is coming? The only constant is Mari… and sometimes even that falls short from where it once was the boy thought.

He had never imagined that he would miss his earlier piloting days. That he could look back at those times and see them as 'better' in some ways.

"You're young, but after what you've seen you're not a kid anymore. Its not fair and yet it is your life, as it was mine. People waste so much time wanting to grow up… and when they finally get there they never realize what they lost along the way." the Broken Man said darkly.

Shinji scoffed at that. Another word of wisdom from the old man. Didn't the bastard ever get tired of talking. He shook at his head at Other.

"What happens now? You gonna fight me for my body?" Shinji said looking up coldly at his Other half. Preparing himself for whatever came next. Gulping at the memory of what had happened last time.

He never understood what his relationship was with the Broken Man. They fought, they talked, argued, and they disagreed at times. His life had been changed drastically by what the old man had done. He didn't forgive the Other for what he did. Yet he could not deny that Other had helped him more than once.

"No. I've told you so many times that if I wanted to, I could have. That's not what I want. I'm tired, boy. We have a job to do. It's not about me. It's about you and the others. All of them."

Young Shinji chewed that over. From what he had seen… the Broken Man was right. He still remembered seeing that thing surrounding the Old Shinji, the power of Adam radiating off of his body. It had been terrifying. No wonder the Angels feared him. The Elder could overpower the younger and take full control if he had wanted too. He could have destroyed Young Shinji just like he had with Other Adam and Yui. Yet he never did.

Not even when Young Shinji ignored his advice and chose another path.

It was hard for Shinji to see things from that point of view. To see things as the Other did. Part of him was angry, another sad, and one just wanted to forget it all.

Young Shinji was about to respond, when suddenly the Broken Man raised a hand.

Old Man Shinji brought his finger, a twisted aged thing, to his lips. The universal sign for silence. Then as Young Shinji blinked in confusion, the Broken Man pointed to the right.

Then, without another word, the Broken Man vanished. The world around Young Shinji went back to normal. Speed running at its normal rate, the world returning to its normal focus, his eyes seeing in a normal rate. The sound around him coming back.

Shinji glanced to the right, where the Broken Man had pointed, and found Mari coming to join him having finally gotten the chance to order.

"Sorry about that. Stupid people took forever. Hey, you get a call? You looked like you were talking to someone?" Mari said.

His girlfriend slid into the seat across from him at the table. Taking the place where the mental projection of the Other had been.

"No… just thinking aloud" Shinji lied with a shrug.

"Weirdo" Mari teased him. Smirking that teasing little grin at him.

Shinji chuckled.

They had a good date together. Out in the city. Mari being the only thing he had left in his life that made feel alive and young. A constant. Yet he never forgot just what had changed in him. How things were never going to be the same.

---

Later

Mari dropped him off at Misato's apartment.

The older girl driving her motorbike into the parking lot of the complex, before coming to a slow stop.

"Tell 'Mama Misato' I said hey. Or maybe not, she thinks I'm a bad influence remember?" Mari teased just as he was getting off.

Shinji almost slipped, almost, before he caught himself. He got off his girlfriend's bike shaking his head in a small laugh, Mari grinning the whole time.

"Does that make me a good influence on you?" Shinji asked coyly.

Mari raised her eyebrows at him.

"Smooth talker" she teased, face breaking into a bright smile.

He was about to say something else when suddenly Misato's voice called out from above.

"Shinji! It's getting late." Misato said.

The two teenagers glanced up to see his legal guardian watching from above on the apartment balcony. Calling out to them from up high. She wasn't mad, not really, just annoyed at Shinji for spending the night at Mari's a while back.

"I'll be up in a minute" Shinji called.

Misato shook her head. As if saying 'sure, you better be.'

"Don't be late," Misato called back, before sighing as she waved half hardheartedly at Mari, and turned back inside.

Mari only rolled her eyes, as if Misato had just proved a point for her.

"Well... that's my luck as always. I'll come by tomorrow" Shinji said, sighing softly at the whole thing.

Mari nodded. About to start up her bike again, Shinji ready to wave her off as she left, when suddenly she stopped. The girl lowering her hand from the bike ignition.

"Hey, dummy... I... I have something for you" Mari said suddenly.

Shinji blinked in surprise.

"What?" he asked stupidly.

Mari shifted uncomfortably, avoiding his gaze for once, as she reached a hand deep into her brown leather jacket. Grabbing something and yanking it out slowly.

She got me a gift, Shinji thought.

His girlfriend help up a box. Eyes uneasy as she presented his gift to him. How strange to see Mari of all people nervous about anything, let alone him.

It was a box of specialized eye contact lenses.

Almost like the kind that actors used in horror movies, but these were built to have a simple brown color. Just plain eyes that wouldn't stand out in a crowd of people. Barely noticeable unless you knew what you were looking at.

"Uh... you said you didn't like the red. Overexposure to LCL. That you misses your old eyes. So I tried to find the closest brown ones I could get. It's harder than you think. I don't have any pictures of you, dummy. The center of the lens lies over your pupil, not the iris, so its clear and you can still see perfectly" Mari said hesitantly.

The first time he'd ever heard her talk like that. So... unsure of herself. He stood in awe at what she had given him. His hands moving over the little box with care.

Mari kept stammering on, finding it hard to stop at Shinji's silence.

"It's supposed to fit most people. If it's too small or something I can get them exchanged or... well... do you like it?" she stammered awkwardly.

Shinji looked up at her.

"Mari" he breathed. "They're amazing. I- how much did they cost? When do you do this?" he asked barely believing it.

"Day after you spent the night. I put a rush order on them. I- I don't have restrictions on my salary as an Eva Pilot. Don't worry about it. I just... thought you'd like them." Mari stammered again. Struggling with giving a gift for the first time in her life.

"Like them? I love them, Mari. Thank you" Shinji said, the boy reached over to kiss her before she could start stammering again.

"They're only contact lenses," Mari said just as her lips were separated from his.

He wanted to kiss her again. She was breathing softly. As if she'd actually thought that he wouldn't like them. That she could ever disappoint him. This... this was one of the nicest things anyone had ever done for him.

"Shinji?! It's getting late!" Misato's voice called again. His guardian peeking out from the balcony above to check on him.

"Gah." He sighed, glancing back at the apartment before turning back to his girlfriend.

Mari patted his chest affectionately. Smiling sadly. She knew what Misato meant to him, but there were times the lady got on her nerves.

"You gotta go. I'm glad you like them" she said.

"I'm sorry. You know that I'd invite you over-" he stammered, clutching Mari's gift tightly in his hands.

"I know. You better come by tomorrow" Mari said, mocking Misato's 'cross' tone.

He sighed and watched her drive out of the parking lot, waving her off with a final goodbye. He scowled and turned his back on the lot, seeing a familiar looking car parked in the next lot over. Directly across the street, with a good view of Misato's apartment.

Shinji headed into the apartment complex, shaking his head, and making his way up the stairs and into the apartment itself. Leaving his shoes in the shoebox before closing the door behind him.

Misato was on her way to bed when she spotted him in the apartment, finally. He apologized for being late, then hurried off to take a shower. His legal guardian shaking her head before heading to her bedroom.

---

After showering and changing into his nightclothes, he stood in front of the bathroom mirror. Mari's gift in hand, and slowly undid the package wrapping.

He read the instruction carefully and followed them. The box came with a small kit for maintenance and eye drops. Shinji placed the specialized contact lenses over his eyes. The contacts that would cover up his red eyes with a brown tint that almost resembled his old eyes.

They felt strange. He wasn't used to having contacts, having never needed glasses, but he knew he could live with them. He'd dealt with a lot worse than some discomfort in the eye.

Young Shinji smiled brightly at his reflection in the bathroom mirror.

Brown eyes. They looked so much like his old ones. And they were from Mari, her gift to him all from a single comment he'd made in bed.

His face fell as a certain thought came floating to his head. Such a wonderful moment ruined by the memories of another man.

Glancing back to make sure the door was closed, it was, he turned back to the bathroom mirror.

"Hey, I know you're there. I wanna talk" he whispered.

Silence followed.

Hello? Hey!

The Broken Man appeared in the room. Tall, dressed in rags with wild greying hair and hollow eyes. He tilted his head at Young Shinji, towering over the boy without even trying.

Young Shinji turned to the mental projection. Slowly eying up the old man.

"She gave you a gift." Old Shinji said blankly. No emotion. Simply stating a fact.

"I like them." the boy began.

"I heard" the man interrupted softly.

The silence carried awkwardly between them. The Broken Man watching him unblinkingly, seeming to have no opinion on the contact lenses.

"I just- I wanna ask you something?" Shinji asked at long last.

The Broken Man only tilted his head at him. Almost like Rei.

"What?" the Elder whispered softly.

"... what happened to Mari? In the other... in the original timeline? Did you ever find out?" Young Shinji asked. Forcing himself to meet the Broken Man's gaze head-on.

It didn't matter that the boy blinked and Other didn't. He could match Other's gaze with one of his own now.

"You saw my memories."

"You jumped around a lot. Skipping ahead. Moving me along until I could handle the most important memory. The Unraveling. But there's a lot I still didn't see. Mari? Did you ever-" Young Shinji said slowly.

Before he was interrupted.

"She died. Everyone did" Old Shinji answered darkly. A low murmur that sent chills down the boy's neck, yet he never looked away. Not anymore.

"You're sure? I-" he began.

"The entire human race died. There was no one left. Only me, and I wasn't human by then anymore. Still not... not really." the Broken Man answered. His voice was so dry and empty. Like the words hurt him in ways that cut deep.

Shinji winced at that. The boy breathing hard but never looking away.

"Even there... she suffered just like everyone else. And you... you just left her." Shinji said through gritted teeth.

"Aye. I did. She was better off without me. I only hurt her in the end. I've had to live with that for years. I buried her, the least I could do" the Broken Man said simply.

Shinji gaped at him. He hadn't seen that.

"You... you did? Show me. I wanna see" Shinji said firmly.

The Broken Man raised a hand, more surprised than anything, and Shinji was gone. Misato's apartment and the bathroom vanished.

...

The Other Place

He was standing in the memory again. Watching through the eyes of another. It hurt, the process was never easy, but he could handle it so much better now.

Young Shinji forced himself to look. Watching the memories of the Original Shinji Ikari. Willingly for once.

---

Memories of the Broken Man
32 years after Third Impact
During the 10 years when Eva Unit 01 was racing towards Earth.

Adam runs wild across the planet.
Wiping out settlements and bringing winter and death across the lands in his mad hunt for Lilith and the Broken man

The Ruins of Haven weren't much to look at. Old Man Shinji trekked through the hellish weather with a shovel in hand, and Lilith by his side.

They stood in stark contrast to each other. Old Shinji wrapped in layers and layers of rags, beard grown out and protecting his face. Lilith, slim and beautiful, immune to the cold, naked and shimmering in dark cloud that followed in her wake.

The old man was breathing hard, his breath leaving small clouds of air in his wake. The change in temperature from his exhales smacking across the sheer cold actually visible to the human eye.

"It is dangerous. Adam came here first. Looking for me... and you" Lilith said. Her voice carrying across the weather without issue.

How strange. The Second Angel just didn't 'play' by the same rules as humans did. Laws of physics seemed to bend for her at will. Her voice having no issues traveling to her companion.

"If he comes, we run." was all the Old Shinji said. Mixed colored eyes shinning out in the cold.

Lilith tilted her head at him. The Woman in the Dark watching him intently as he moved about the ruins of his former home. All of it was gone.

Barely a trace of the settlement that had been here before. The mountains torn down, the forest barren and lifeless, homes and shacks gone, broken and covered in ashes of unnatural snow and ice. Frozen planks of shattered wood littered the grounds. Yet Old Shinji barely seemed to notice.

"I dislike it here. It smells of death. The scent of my brother and his vengeance. I can feel them… the dead. Their anguish and sorrow." Lilith said darkly.

"Where would they be? The bodies?" Old Shinji asked, glancing back at his only companion and teacher. Voice hoarse and raw in the cold.

Lilith knelt. The Second Angel running her hands across the dead lands. Eyes unblinking as she felt for the bodies with her sorcery.

"There… there is where they stood before Adam brought his wrath upon them. More than half died in the first moments." Lilith told him. Her voice like silk even now, inhuman and soft, yet powerful as a bolt of lightning.

Then they didn't feel pain… they didn't suffer… that doesn't make it right. He thought bitterly.

Old Shinji closed his eyes and turned away, wincing as if struck. Before he gritted his teeth and followed the Woman in the Dark.

Together, they dug up the bodies. Lilith and her sorcery finding their remains under the grey snow, Shinji pulling them out and lining them up. Maybe a dozen or so, all that he could find even with Lilith helping. Corpses left exposed to the ashes and unnatural cold.

Then, Old Shinji started digging. One row of graves after another. It took hours, and he refuses to let Lilith help.

One by one he buried the old inhabitants of Haven. Giving them a proper grave instead of left out in the cold. He couldn't say all their names, save for one, and that one he saved until the very end. A final grave that would end this last act of kindness.

Mari.

There wasn't much left of her. The cold had helped preserve her corpse, but even that had its limits. Her skin was fading, leaving behind a thin husk in the cold, bits of hair clinging to a gaunt skeletal frame.

Yet he knew it was her. The clothes she had been wearing when she had died. Her hair, and her eyes… Mari had died with her eyes open. Empty and hollow, the white have frozen solid in death, staring out aimlessly. Broken long before her death.

Grime faced, Old Shinji scooped her into his arms, just like the day he had saved her years and years ago, and carried her to her grave. He buried Mari carefully. Putting her to rest. It didn't make it right, nothing he ever did could, but it was something he could do.

Lilith stared at him as he slumped over, leaning on the shovel for support. Arms exhausted from digging so many graves. The human in him tired, the Angel in him only weary.

"I'm sorry you're dead." Old Shinji said to Mari's grave. A cheap little thing. No tombstone or marker, but a burial all the same.

He breathed out harshly. His breath leaving a cloud of evaporated particles in the air, the reaction from the change in temperature. Lilith came to sit across from him.

Old Shinji looked over the freshly dug grave.

"I only hurt you in the end. I… you deserved better" Old Shinji whispered darkly. His last words to the woman he had lived with, but had never loved. Had never married. The woman whom had given him her heart and had not been treated in kind.

Silence was his answer. As always.

He closed his eyes feeling like he was a hundred years old. He sat there, beside Mari's grave for quite some time. Lilith nearby, giving him his space.

"She had your body, but never your heart." Lilith said at last.

Old Shinji looked up at his teacher, hollow empty eyes meeting her pale red ones.

He didn't deny it. He never had. Not even to Mari herself. Yet she had gone with him in the end. She had admitted to using him just as he had used her. And they had both been wrong.

The memories of Mari made his eye stung. His human eye wanting to weep. The Angel one stiff and uncaring. Two halves that were now his reality.

"Were you… was my wife angry at me? For Mari? Whatever's left of her inside you… did she hate me?" The Broken Man asked. Voice hiccuping with raw emotion.

The words stammering out like he was pulling a bullet from his flesh. A wound. Open and raw. Exposed.

"Yes." Lilith answered.

Old Shinji looked away. Head hung low in the cold. He deserved nothing else.

Then Lilith knelt before him, inches from his face, moving so quickly that his eyes couldn't keep up. Her form seeming to 'appear' in front of him instantaneously.

"Rei was angry at you. Was. But she could have never hated you for long. She loved you, Shinji. Even now, even in death, the part of her in me never stopped loving you." Lilith said. Her hands on his face.

She caressed his face. Embracing him in the cold. Resting her forehead atop his. The mirror image of a 26 year old Rei Ikari.

"Rei forgave you. She wanted you to be happy." the Second Angel whispered sweetly. She cupped his face with her hands warmly.

Lilith would have kissed him. Would have comforted him, would have made love to him, but he turned away as he always did.

But I wasn't happy with Mari. Just less sad. Old Man Shinji thought.

The Broken Man pulled away from Lilith's embrace with distant sorrowful eyes.

"Thank you" he whispered to her. He got to his feet, choosing the cold over the warmth of another. He turned away from the love of a near God like being.

Lilith stood with him, watching as he glanced up at her. His human eye was crying now, no longer able to hold it back. He tired to speak. To tell Lilith he was sorry, but that he couldn't. Not just with her, but with anyone, that he was too far gone for such things.

He couldn't love Lilith, and he wouldn't use her the way he had used Mari.

The Second Angel only nodded. Sad smile planted on her face. A simple gesture that conveyed so much. An understanding and acceptance.

Old Shinji felt that he didn't deserve it. Such loyalty and love from a God like being.

An understanding between student and teacher.

"Its not safe. We stayed too long in one place. We should go before Adam comes back" Old Shinji said, breathing hard.

Lilith nodded. And together, the Broken Man and the Woman in the Dark departed. Leaving the graves behind, leaving that chapter of Shinji's life closed for good. A final act of kindness.

---

The Other Place

Young Shinji wiped the single pair of tears from his eyes. Yet the tear drops fell to the floor anyway. Splashing onto the faded pavement.

The boy shuddered as he left the memory.

Mari… oh Mari… he thought. Shaking as if out in the cold himself.

He stood in the same fragment as before, the small stretch of land with the ruins of a city in the distance. The ruins of Tokyo-03.

The Broken Man stood nearby. Watching the boy curiously.

"I… thank you for burying her" Young Shinji said slowly.

"I didn't do it for you" the Broken Man said somberly. Not an insult or a rebuttal, just a fact.

The boy shook his head. Unable to stop the shaking that came from the memories. The emotions that sometimes carried over and mixed with his own. But even without it… just seeing Mari's corpse had shaken him to his core.

"Why did you help her? Why did you make her leave the ward? In my timeline. Here… did you really hate me that much?" Young Shinji asked bitterly.

Asked the man whom had cured Mari before she had even had the chance to suffer.

"Do you think everything I do is to make you miserable? Is that what you think of me?" the Broken Man asked sternly. Voice low, almost annoyed.

"It's what you do-"

"No. You keep assuming I have one reason for doing anything. Wrong. Did I want her to leave the ward? Yes. Did I want her gone from your life? Yes." Old Shinji admitted tiredly.

Young Shinji was about to glare, but the next words stopped him in his tracks

"And… I wanted to help her. I felt sorry for her. For everything." the Broken Man admitted. His hollow eyes never leaving Shinji's. Dark and somber.

"You saved her… gave her a life she could never have had before. That's all that matters" Shinji said, breathing heavily.

The Other Mari was not the same girl his Mari was. His Mari had been allowed to live without the restrictions of the Other version. Without her sickness.

"I shouldn't have done it." the Broken Man said suddenly. Eyes distant as he glanced down at his bad hand, three fingers where their should have been five.

"No. It was the right thing to do." Shinji said through gritted teeth. How dare he… how dare this ass say something like that the boy thought.

"I was selfish. Now look where it got us. We're divided. And Mari is an Eva Pilot in this timeline." the Broken Man spat. Regret and anger filling his voice.

"What's so wrong with that? Mari loves being a pilot. She finds it fun and-" Shinji started, glaring into the eyes of his Other self.

"Then she's an idiot." the Broken Man said simply.

Shinji fumed.

"You take that back!" the boy said nearly shouting.

"No. She's young, and I hope she grows out of it, but she's blind. She thinks its all fun and games. Running around in a giant robot. Reckless. Never considering how close she's come to dying. How close you've come to dying. You think Mari had 'fun' when Zeruel blew her Eva's arm off? When he impaled her through the chest and threw her miles into the Geofront? When she was lying in the hospital for days." the Broken Man countered. His voice never rose, it didn't have to.

The words cut through Young Shinji deep enough that a whisper would have sufficed.

"Or even you? You stopped a Nuke. Caught an Angel as it was breaking through the atmosphere to kill all life on earth. You think she was having 'fun' when your skull was fractured?" the Broken Man countered flatly.

Distantly, Young Shinji remembered that incident. The rubble from Nerv's hangar colliding into his head, fracturing his skull, the blood running down his face. The stunted movements. Without the Broken Man and Eva Unit 01 healing him, Shinji would have died.

Either way, the boy wanted to punch the Broken Man again. Right in his face. But he knew it was pointless. No amount of injury he caused the Broken Man would do anything. That freak of a man seemed nearly immune to pain now.

"Maybe that's true… she's not perfect… but that's not the Mari I know. She's more than that" Shinji spat.

The Broken Man looked at him wordlessly. I'm not apologizing his expression seemed to say.

"Is this why you wanted to talk? To argue about your girlfriend? I don't trust her. End of story. We have more important things to deal with, boy." the Broken Man said at last.

Young Shinji took a deep breath. Forcing himself to calm down. Whatever their differences, no matter how much he hated the Other, there was a bigger issue. There always had been, Shinji had just been too stupid to see it. Part of him wanting to ignore it, to run away, but he mustn't run away.

So he wasn't. Not anymore.

"I'll help you" Young Shinji at long last.

The Broken Man looked up at him in surprise. Eyes widening ever so slightly, as if coming to life after years of slumber.

"But I have conditions." Young Shinji added.

"You have conditions for saving the world? And I thought you were a good man" the Broken Man scoffed. The Elder shaking his head at the younger.

"Gah! Stop that! Just stop it!" Young Shinji spat.

The Broken Man crossed his arms.

"You wanna save the world! I know! But don't pretend like you didn't have conditions either. You want me to just go along with the life you tried to carve for me. Wanting me to be you" Young Shinji said. Heart racing as he pointed at the Elder.

"No. Not me. I wanted you to have more-"

"You know what I mean!" Young Shinji shouted back.

The Broken Man narrowed his eyes at the boy. Yet neither backed down.

My future self can be such an 'A' hole he thought bitterly.

The Broken Man looked away first. The first time that had ever happened during their talks. It made Shinji blink in surprise. Standing in awe of it.

"You're talking about Rei. I know, nothing I tell you will make you change your mind. You're so stubborn. The arrogance of the young. To think that they know what love is." the Broken Man said darkly. Seeming to shrink as he looked away, eyes downcast, as if hurt.

"The arrogance of the old. To think that they know everything." Young Shinji countered.

The Broken Man gave him a cold hard look, but said nothing.

Young Shinji walked forward, coming face to face with the Broken Man as the Elder turned to meet him.

"I'm sorry" the boy said finally. Letting his anger go.

Old Shinji said nothing.

"I'm so sorry" Young Shinji said, and he meant it. Genuinely sorry for what he was doing. But he had to do it.

The boy's eyes fell, never downcast, but somber.

"That was your life… not mine. This. This is me. You say that if you wanted to take control, you could have. And I believe you. I couldn't stop you no matter how hard I tried. But you pushing me to Rei, making a path for me to follow… that was wrong" Young Shinji said softly.

"You would have been happy-"

"You don't know that. Everything's changed. It changed the day you came back." Young Shinji said, eyes stern.

The Broken Man looked away again. Facing demons that were his and his alone.

"You're asking me to give up my daughter..." the Old Shinji whispered. Voice low and broken.

"She's gone… Shinji." the boy said.

The Broken Man only kept his distance. Eyes downcast. He hadn't been called by his own name in so long now. Years.

"Akane is gone. I'm sorry. She's gone and she's never coming back. Even if it was same, if I was with Rei… it wouldn't be Akane. It would be someone else." Shinji said softly. Genuinely heartbroken at his own words.

Eyes watering and chest growing heavy.

Yet it was the Broken Man whom shook. Fingers in his bad twitching as if in shock, three fingers where their should have been five.

"Change the subject. Now." the old man said. Voice shaking but firm. Pained but strong. Weak yet tough. Broken but warm.

Young Shinji looked away. Feeling ashamed himself for that. But it was what needed to be done.

"I'm sorry for your lost. I am, really." Shinji said wishing he were better at this.

"Don't be. Nothing I haven't told myself before." the Broken Man said harshly.

He whirled around at the Young Shinji, eyes hurt and raw like a nerve. The human in him cut deep.

"I know. I've always known. I couldn't save her, my little girl. I can't bring her back… all I can do is make a world where she could have lived." the Broken Man said. Speaking as if every words pained him. Because it did.

Every word a scar that would not close. A wound that would never heal. Not till the day he died.

Shinji wanted to take it back. He wished he'd never brought 'her' up.

However he felt about the Broken Man… Akane had been a glimpse of another life for him too. And a part of him hurt at the memory of her. At the possibility that he could have been a father.

"You have conditions. Name them." the Broken Man said darkly, voice almost reaching a shout. Almost. The flicker of Adam's power in the Broken Man's eye, a warning that sent Young Shinji on edge... before it faded.

The Broken Man meant the boy no harm. But he could tell he was pushing things.

"I just want to have my life. I didn't want any of this, I want to ignore it, but I can't. Because you're right. The world waits for no one." Young Shinji said darkly.

It was hard for him to admit that the Broken Man had been right. That no matter what he did, it was coming.

"And they're all out there. Plotting and moving. I care about people too. I wanna save them. But I can't live that life you carved for me because that isn't me." Young Shinji said at last.

He was a teenager, but he felt so much older at times. Even this, even the way he talked. He wasn't sure how to feel about that.

The boy took another deep breath, and held out his hand.

The Broken Man looked it over numbly. Before he reached a hand over, and grasped the boy's hand in a firm shake.

An agreement after all this time. Uneasy. A reluctant and unlikely partnership, but one nonetheless. The world would not save itself.

Partners.

"You can't forget about Rei." the Broken Man said, holding Shinji's grasp within his in.

"I know what she meant to you. But I'm not changing my mind-" Young Shinji began, speaking softly and under his breath. He knew it must have been hard for his Other.

The Broken Man shook his head.

"Yes, she was my wife. My love. And she was more." Old Shinji said, looking like a pale shadow of a man. Eyes lost where even Young Shinji could not follow.

"More?" the boy asked with a frown.

"You keep forgetting that, Shinji." the Old Man said looking more tired than anything.

Old Shinji had had to wait years and years for this. So many things had gone wrong for him. So many had gone right. Things that even he couldn't plan for.

Young Shinji stared at him. Trying to pull his hand free, but Old Shinji didn't let him go. The Elder had the boy's attention and he wouldn't let it go until he'd had his say.

"Rei is... quite possibility the single most important person to ever walk the earth" the Broken Man said in awe.

Young Shinji didn't understand.

"What? Rei is... she's a pilot and-" the boy said. Thinking things over as he spoke, frowning at the grim expression on his Other's face.

"She's the key. Rei is literally a part of Lilith. Everything that she feels, her emotions, her wants and desires, her fears, her pain, her joy and sorrows. All of it goes into Lilith. They're connected." the Broken Man said.

Unable to express how vital and important that was. It was huge.

In Young Shinji's mind, he could see the Woman in the Dark. The Second Angel from the Original Shinji's memories. The one whom had turned against her own kind to help the Broken Man.

Whom had been forced by SEELE into starting instrumentality in the Original Timeline.

Young Shinji stared at the Elder in awe. And realized that he had been an idiot for never noticing it. He saw the memories of the Original Shinji, and still hadn't figured out what that meant. Rei's experiences become Lilith's.

When Rei had loved the Broken Man... Lilith had loved him too. Rei's personality and soul became another part of the Second Angel's.

That didn't seem like much at first... but the more Young Shinji thought about it... the more he realized. Lilith, the Angel that SEELE planned to instigate Instrumentality with. The Angel that Gendo had abused and conducted experiments on, all in a bid to bring Yui back.

All of it hinged on Lilith, and on Adam. Even the other Angels were tied to those two. But Lilith was everyone's key. The one Angel that could be controlled under the right circumstance. The madness and cruelty of SEELE and now Gendo too. Monsters they were.

And Lilith's vessel... her view into the human world... was Rei.

Now you understand the Broken Man thought. The Old Shinji released the boy's hand. Seeing the sheer awe in his eyes as he realized it.

"I- you're right. That was... you said you had more than one reason for doing things. And Rei, did Gendo even realize what he made?" Young Shinji said barely believe it.

"No. He thought he made an imperfect copy of Yui, one that he could use to bring her back. But he was wrong. Rei is not Yui, she's Lilith."

"What happens now? What can we do?" Young Shinji asked. Looking at his future self firmly.

"First, we need an ally. Someone else who can help us from the inside. Someone just like us." the Broken Man said. Moving onto business.

"An ally?" Young Shinji asked.

The Broken Man told him, and his eyes widened.

---

Back in the real world

Young Shinji put Mari's gift back in the box. Putting the contact lenses up for the night, he'd have to get used to them tomorrow. The closest he could get to his old eyes.

And later that night, when he went back to his room, he went to his old dresser. Finding it untouched in all the time he had been 'away'.

Shinji reached inside and found all his pills. The red and black medicine. The poison that Dr. Page and SEELE had been feeding him for most of his life.

'Take your pills' his doctors had told him. 'Take your pills' the staff at the ward had said. More than five years of drilling it into his head.

No more.

The boy scoffed at the sight of them. Before he gathered them up and sent them spilling over and down into the sink. He opened the faucet and let the water sink them all down the drain.

Red and black, all his pills gone just like that.

He didn't need them anymore. He never had.

---

Big focus on our two Shinji(s). Their relationships and lives.
It might be jarring, but please remember that Young Shinji is coming from his 'golden era' seen in chapter 19 and the start of chapter 20 before Zeruel. For him, everything he's seen changed him.

Had trouble with pacing this chapter, and moved stuff around to other chapters, one of the reasons for the delay. It may not seem like it, but there are important plot points in chapter 31 not just character moments.

What did you think of the Broken Man burying Other Mari?
Of the glimpse of Adam's power?
Of Young Shinji finding everything different after two months away? With only 'his' Mari his constant?

Thanks for Reading and please Review!