Hey guys! This one shot is slightly dark but not violent. Hiro's perspective. Dead Tadashi. I'm sorry. Rated T for minor description of body. Nothing gruesome. Please review and request! Thank you to Silvie for being so diligent in reviewing!

TRIGGER WARNING: SUICIDE ATTEMPT

My chest is heaving, every breath a stab of pain. It feels good. It reminds me I'm alive.

Really, it's just the adrenaline, but I like having a deep, meaningful explanation for it.

Almost a year after Tadashi died, I stand where I've imagined my victory a thousand times. At the edge of San Fransokyo bridge. Face to face with Professor Callaghan.

Face to face with the man who murdered my brother.

"Give up, Hiro," Callaghan says lazily. "You have nothing against me."

"Nothing against you?" I almost laugh. "You killed Tadashi. You murdered my brother."

Callaghan shakes his head. "Oh, Hiro. Poor, sweet, naïve Hiro."

"What?" I spit.

"I didn't set that fire."

"Liar."

He clicks his tongue disapprovingly. "I thought you were supposed to be smart. No, I'm telling the truth. I stole your microbots, yes, but I did not set the fire that killed Tadashi."

"If you didn't, who did?"

"Oh, it was quite an accident. A young applicant at SFIT disturbed some loose wires in the ceiling during his demonstration. He has no idea, poor boy."

Callaghan smiles, the kind of smile that everyone describes as not reaching his eyes. "He was brilliant, but his experiment ended in tragedy. The total death count for the fire was only one. The singular victim was the boy's beloved older brother."

It takes a moment for the words to sink in. One dead. The arsonist's brother.

Tadashi.

It was…me?

Swinging upside down from the light fixtures. Tadashi jumping to give me a high five as I passed.

Wires sparking in the ceiling.

No.

It was me.

I set the fire.

I killed Tadashi.

Callaghan is innocent.

I am the murderer.

My mind is swimming with the revelation. It was me. All this time I've been searching for revenge for my brother, and now it is in my grasp.

I stare at the gray water swirling below me, twenty, thirty, fifty feet away. One step. One step and I will have avenged Tadashi.

"Go on, Hiro," Callaghan drawls from behind me. "You wanted revenge. Revenge is right in front of you."

He's right. I killed Tadashi. I deserve to die.

I take a deep breath and jump.

The pain is the first thing I'm aware of when I hit the water. First excruciating pain in my chest, then a lesser one in my right leg. The world goes white.

Then black.

"Hiro?"

I blink slowly. Why am I alive? I should have died. I meant to die.

"Hiro, it's me."

That voice. That voice I haven't heard in over a year.

"Tadashi?"

"Get your big brain together, knucklehead."

My vision finally clears. A very familiar face is above me, surrounded by light.

Tadashi pulls me to my feet. He's glowing. Huge, bright white wings sprout from his shoulders.

"Why do you have wings?" I twist to see my back. "Why do I have wings?"

"I'm an angel, Hiro. So are you."

"Why are mine so small?"

"You're new to heaven."

"Why am I in heaven? Why aren't I in…?"

"H-E-double hockey sticks?"

"Yeah. There."

"Why would you be there?"

I stare at him. "I killed two people."

He tilts his head. "Who?"

"Idiot," I mutter. "You and me."

"Oh." Tadashi tears a hand through his hair. "You didn't kill me, Hiro."

"Yes I did! I set the fire! My microbots—"

"No, bonehead." Tadashi places his hands on my shoulders. "He was lying to you. You didn't set the fire. It was all him."

My face relaxes into a glare. "Seriously?"

Tadashi nods.

"You're kidding!" I throw up my hands. "I just jumped off a bridge! I just freaking killed myself and he was LYING to me? Ugh!"

"It's okay, Hiro."

"It's not okay! What are they gonna do without me?" All the frustration drains out of me. "Aunt Cass…oh my gosh, she's…"

"It's okay. You're not dead. Not really."

I stare at him. "I'm not dead?"

"Well, you are, but…you're going back."

"Back?"

"Stop repeating everything I say, knucklehead!"

"Fine!" I take a deep breath. "I'm going back. But I'm dead?"

"Well, yeah." Tadashi waves his hand and a sort of screen appears in the air. I see myself—my body—floating in San Fransokyo Bay, pale and motionless. Dead.

Ew.

"Turn it off," I mumble. Tadashi waves his hand again and it disappears. "That is disgusting."

"Just a suggestion," Tadashi says, "you'll want to cough up all the water now."

I tilt my head. "Will that work?"

"Yeah. Your ribs are broken, so it's going to hurt a lot if you cough with that. Get it over with."

I try my best to cough without knowing what I'm coughing up. I finish and straighten up, trying to regain control of my breathing. Coughing on purpose doesn't help my asthma.

"You good?" Tadashi asks. I nod, still breathing hard.

"Hiro, I'm going to send you back. It'll only hurt for a second, I promise. Ready?"

Hurt?

"I'm ready."

Tadashi wraps his arms—wings—around me one more time, and then the world is swirling around me, slowly turning from heaven to earth.

I'm going back.

Again, the first thing I know when I regain consciousness is pain. Pain every time I breathe, every time I move. I don't know how many ribs I've broken, but even one or two is painful. I think this is more.

I struggle to my knees, at first trying to stay quiet, but then figuring that no one can hear me and let out a whimper of pain. My ribs really hurt.

I manage to get to my feet, balancing with most of my weight on my left side. My right knee collapses every time I try to walk on it.

I stand on the shore of San Fransokyo Bay, only a few hundred feet from where I died. I wonder if the others know. I wonder if Aunt Cass knows. How long have I been gone?

I limp along the beach until I reach the main road. At least here I have something to support me when I nearly collapse half a mile from the café.

I finally make it there and open the door. The café is dark and empty, though not locked. I guess Aunt Cass must have heard.

I hear the faint sound of a crying woman as I start up the stairs. Other voices mix with hers, murmuring comfort. It sounds like Tadashi's funeral all over again. Aunt Cass crying, the others trying to comfort her, me quietly retreating to my room where no one could see me slamming my fist into my pillow and asking God why Tadashi had to die, clutching his hat to my chest and sobbing. It takes me back somewhere I don't want to go.

Closing my eyes in concentration, I force my mind away from the hardest day of my life and keep walking. I have to get to Aunt Cass and the others. I have to let them know I'm okay.

When I get to the top of the stairs, for a moment all I can do is stand there and wait for them to see me. They don't, so I just quietly say, "Hey, guys."

Everyone screams, even GoGo. Aunt Cass is in the middle of the huddle, her eyes red and puffy. Honey looks like she's been crying too, but the others just look shocked.

Aunt Cass is first to find her voice. "Hiro!"

She stands up and the next thing I know, she's hugging me so hard I can't breathe. My ribs explode with pain as she squeezes them, but I try not to let it show.

"You're alive!" Honey shrieks. "How are you alive?"

"The ribs," I gasp without answering her. "Please not the ribs."

Aunt Cass releases me. "What else happened? Are you hurt? How are you alive?"

I give her a half smile. "Tadashi."