Knitting Fate

Second installment in Canon Patchworking with Uchiha Ren series

Forty-Seventh Thread

•••

This chapter has been beta'd for you by hestia8693, who, just like me, is currently braving university exams, therefore if there are still mistakes present - blame the education.

So, hi, hello, I'm alive, have way more subjects than last semester and managed to pass my finals on a first try, somehow. And now I have battled my very uncooperative muse and finally squeeze this chapter out.

So, yeah, I'm alive. University is not fun.

(On a side note - Deidara still isn't 13 in this chapter. His birthday is in May and we're still around January somewhere.)

"Friends show their love in times of trouble, not in happiness."
― Euripides

0

Hana, by some weird Ren-oriented Hana-sense she has developed during the last almost-three years of their friendship, is waiting for Ren by the exit of the Hokage Tower, casual clothes, sleepy dogs, stern, unamused expression and all. Ren just smiles, waving tiredly and still very much preferring her uninjured leg. While her growth spurt has been quite massive, Ren was never really particularly gangly, budding muscle under a healthy layer of fat. She wasn't ripped, like Gai, of course. She would never be – physical form is not the icon of strength, after all.

(Chōji might've slipped out, once, that Akimichi are largely immune to physical attacks thanks to their layer of fat. It stops the kinetic force to a certain degree, apparently. Ren, having tried it – with a lot less fat, but still enough to rid her of the chiseled appearance – is inclined to agree. She can even take one of Gai's punches when before she couldn't. Only one though, she's not suicidal.

...

Too suicidal. Is that even a thing? Can someone be just suicidal enough?)

"One mission that's C or above without injuries," Hana says. "Just one. Is it too much to ask?"

"Um..." Ren scratches the back of her neck. "In my defense, I fought two jōnin? And survived?"

"Ren..." uh-oh, angry Hana. On the other hand, Ren's words might've had a completely opposite effect than what she'd intended.

"Um, I was... left unsupervised?" she tries again, and Hana's eyes narrow even more. "I mean, come on, mild chakra exhaustion and a stab wound in my leg. That's, like, better than most of my missions!"

Hana is just about to answer when Deidara, following a girl in the grey T&I uniform towards the Intelligence building, appears and turns to the Inuzuka, saying, "the stab wound was also poisoned, in case she didn't tell you."

Little fucking traitor.

"It wasn't that bad!" Ren doesn't shriek. The sound she makes is in pure offense, but she doesn't shriek. Honestly.

"It was a strong paralyzer, she nearly shut down!" the traitor adds cheerfully, following his now-amused lead, and Ren shivers. She can feel it, behind her, where Hana stands – the Inuzuka's barely-restrained fury. That's it. She's done for. Goodbye, world.

"I'm starting to think that you enjoy pain," Hana says mildly, but Ren knows the Inuzuka much too well to be fooled - but running is not an option anymore, so the only thing she can do is brace herself for the inevitable.

"I... don't?" she says uncertainly and it comes out sounding much more like a question than it ever should. "Um. I got used to it, though-"

"You are RIDICULOUS!" Hana raises her voice dangerously, enough to stop a few passers-by in their tracks in shock. "Each and every mission I worry if you'll even come back at all, and how many parts will be missing if you do! You'll be the death of me!"

Wow, okay. Put it that way and Ren does feel bad about it.

"I didn't choose my shit luck okay," she grumbles. "It's a ninja's life, such risks are expected! I don't see you hounding on your patients nearly as much as you do me!"

"Because you're my friend, you moron!" Hana snaps and throws herself at Ren, trapping the Uchiha in a bone-crushing hug that knocks the air out of her lungs. "Of course I care for you more than some random patient! That's why I'm angry, you know. Because you getting hurt affects me way more than others. You get it, you idiot?"

"I'm sorry, too," Ren groans breathlessly. "Could you not crush my ribs though, please?" She pats Hana's back. The Inuzuka snorts and lets go before cuffing Ren on the back of her head. The Uchiha yelps, grabbing the back of her head, and mock-glares at her friend. Hana snorts in answer, rolling her eyes.

"Let's get you home," she says. "The kids will be back soon."

"Yeah. It's good to be back, you know."

"I know. Come on, I want to look at that leg of yours before your horde smothers you."

"Yes, mom."

"Ren."

Ren wants to say that she worries for how Deidara's interview-interrogation is going, and she kind of does, but she is definitely not fretting over it in the slightest, laying on her couch in her flat, stuffing her face with the okonomiyaki that Hana dragged her to buy on the way home, snacking in between bites on the remaining bonfire-cooked venison leftover from the mission, which definitely tastes better when dipped in a bit of soy sauce. Ren makes a mental note to take soy sauce on missions with her from then on; it made everything more palatable.

Of course, before she even thought about unpacking the takeout, Hana had demanded to see the leg. Ren doesn't know what her friend had been imagining upon Deidara's confession about it, but certainly something worse than it was, because what she was met with was a simple kunai stab wound, not very deep and not wide enough to even warrant sewing during the mission, already closing and oily from the ointments pressed to it by a rather tight but breathable bandage. The surprise is practically painted on Hana's face, bright as day.

"So you say the poison was a fact acting but otherwise simple curare type?" Hana asks, and the only thing she lacks is a notebook. Ren knows that the Inuzuka is making mental notes, but she's also used to it by now. Whenever she comes back from a mission, she goes to give her report first, and after that it's only a matter of time until Hana descends on her and drags her, depending on Ren's wounds, to either her home, the Inuzuka compound, or the hospital.

"I summoned Takuya-sensei, don't worry," she says from over her food. "I'm reckless, not stupid."

"I've had my doubts," Hana snorts, and Ren sighs long-sufferingly. A person takes a hit for her once, maybe loses a hand in the process (temporarily!) and that's what she gets.

And then, as if on cue, many pairs of feet can be heard in the corridor. It sounds like a herd of animals, really, and sure enough, the lock turns, and the door to Ren's apartment opens, and the herd flows in.

"I did not buy enough food for a whole school trip," Ren complains loudly from where she sits in the living room, and the shuffling stops for a second. Then, she can hear audibly and carelessly discarded packs, shoes, and coats, someone kicking the door closed, and Naruto, with Sasuke on his heels, all but bursting into the living room.

"Oneechan, you're back!" the hyperactive ray of sunshine yells, and Ren winces. Her eardrums will eventually stop working because of him, probably.

"Nee-san," Sasuke greets her much more calmly, and she sighs, turning around to see whoever else her brats dragged here. Sakura is no surprise, as she's taken it upon herself to be the voice of reason when Ren isn't around (she probably should be even when Ren is around, please and thank you). Kiba is also no surprise, only his sister and Sakura visit more frequently than him, but Hinata kind of is, and without Neji no less. The stuck-up better-than-thou child hardly ever lets Hinata out of his sight – partly thanks to his Byakugan – and sometimes Ren feels like he enjoys ruining his cousin's fun. There are moments when she questions if she even wants to bother trying to work through his attitude to begin with.

"Hey brats," she waves. "I probably should've prepared for guests, but I'm tired and I almost died on the mission-"

"Oh, really," Hana drawls, sending her friend a glare.

"-and therefore I'm drained and I want to sleep forever," Ren continues without even a blink. "You can have the deer I hunted, though. It's pretty good with soy sauce."

She glances at Naruto, practically ripping his double serving of okonomiyaki free from its plastic bag, and thinks. Plots, almost. She did want to reveal to Naruto his true parentage, somehow, but she never had an idea how – nor any real motivation, to be honest. But now, if Deidara really turns out to be somehow related to Minato, like she and, possibly, Sarutobi Hiruzen, suspects, then she has to do it soon. Somehow.

Hana sends her a sideways glance, as if she knows what Ren is thinking – a possibility Ren doesn't rule out, Hana somehow just knows things – and is trying to decide if it's a bad or a dumb idea.

"Hey, hey, oneechan, can you help us with homework?" Naruto asks, and Ren shrugs. She always does, why does he even bother asking?

"Sure, what is it about?"

"It's from history class," Sasuke explains. "We have to write an essay on one of the Hokage of our village."

Ren stops, and then she blinks.

Sometimes, she can't even believe her sheer dumb luck.

"Huh," she says from above her styrofoam box of almost-finished okonomiyaki. "Yeah, I'll get you a more detailed book on them, okay?"

"Oh, one of those that only chūnin or above can check out from the library?" Sakura asks, eyes gleaming. There wasn't much written shinobi detail available for genin and below, after all, and Sakura always enjoys learning information of all kinds. Hana never really bats an eye checking out advanced medical scrolls for the girl, and partly thanks to that and partly thanks to Sakura looking up to them – kunoichi like Ren, Hana and Anko – the pinkette is shaping up to be absolutely terrifying.

"Yes," Ren nods. "I'll try to find a detailed one. Preferably with color pictures, if available, although that might be hard for the first two Hokage-"

The kids chatter happily after that, Kiba and Akamaru devouring the venison almost as fast as Naruto, and Hinata slowly sipping a cup of matcha tea that Hana brewed for her after stopping Ren from doing so, or even rising from the couch.

All the while, Ren plots. The kids have pictures and illustrations of the previous Hokage, but they are all grayscale for some reason. Of course, she can't outright tell Naruto about his parentage, that is – idiotically, might she add – forbidden. But she trusts the kids to draw parallels when she throws a stack of Minato's pictures at them.

They're smart cookies, the lot of them.

Ibiki is having a bad day.

He had known since this morning, when one of the many of the Hokage's almost-assassins confessed nothing and instead used a seal on his tongue to kill himself before they could've even called for a Yamanaka to look at his mind. He knew it was bad when an autopsy from a mystery murder case came back bearing no clues.

However that, that was not entirely unexpected. He could work through that.

But, in hindsight, he really should've called it a day the second a kid with the face of the fourth Hokage stepped through the threshold. Especially when he learned that the kid was there courtesy of one Uchiha Ren – the very same spider-wielding devil-may-care friend of Anko's that took in the Uzumaki brat two years prior and sued civilians left and right with a childlike glee for slander, effectively bringing some to bankruptcy – he really, really should've just gotten up and left.

He didn't, of course.

And now he is regretting it.

The kid – Deidara – as it turns out, is a former Iwa ninja who made tokujō before he was thirteen, left his village, and decided to give joining Konoha a shot – because Uchiha Ren once jokingly told him he could if he grew tired of his village, and that's just what he did.

Because of course.

Not only that, but also the impossible likeness of the kid to their Fourth Hokage, and a notice from the Third to also perform a genetic kinship test – and keep it under wraps. That alone is enough to give Ibiki a headache.

Then, of course, the one to 'talk' to Deidara has to be Anko. The two of them are arguing now, in the interrogation room, over whether blowing the head off with miniature bombs is more amusing than simply ripping it off.

The worst part is that Deidara genuinely seems to want to join their village, and eagerly provides intel on Iwa with a mischievous smile. He doesn't like his old village, that much is clear, and, for some reason, his loyalty lies with Uchiha Ren now.

Ugh, whatever. Ren is a loyal Konoha shinobi crazy enough to befriend Anko. He could give the kid a pass, if only for being a valuable warrior to add to their ranks. Maybe he could teach their shinobi the techniques of the Explosion Corps? It's obvious his hands are his own bloodline limit, and he's plainly stated that no one else in the corps has them.

Yes, Deidara would be a valuable asset to the village. But is it wise to cart him off to Ren's doorstep?

No. No, that is not a good idea. That is a very, very bad idea, bound to end in either collateral damage or straight up genocide, depending on how much the civilians would piss Ren off this week by trying to target the Uzumaki kid.

But there is another option. A much smarter option, if he says so himself.

Ibiki turns to his side to look at where Kotetsu and Izumo are loitering around, free of their gate duty and playing interrogator assistants.

Yes, this is a good idea. Genma had managed to herd those two and Umino Iruka into semi-responsible adults, and he lives close enough to Uchiha Ren to prevent any complaining from Deidara.

Morino Ibiki gives himself a mental pat on the back. If anyone were to be able to reign in Deidara, it would be Genma. He is pretty sure Anko mentioned Ren calling him a saint, on multiple occasions, and if the Uchiha holds him in such high regard, so would their newest addition who, as of now, seems to take her word as gospel.