Ellie was pretty sure she blacked out. She didn't remember deciding to knock on the door to interrupt Ethan and Hailey. She didn't remember calling out, "Everybody get washed up, we're gonna start dinner!" but apparently that's what she did.

And then everyone was in the kitchen. Alan kept shooting her suspicious and worried looks, like he was waiting for her to do something insane and trying to warn her against that. And then there was Ethan, sitting there like a kicked puppy. He was always a quiet kid, but this was much, much more than that. And Hailey, who Ellie didn't really know as well, was definitely quiet, too.

Something had to be done, and Ellie knew it. She also knew that neither of the kids were going to do anything about it. And Alan 'confrontation and blunt honesty are my diagnosed allergies' Grant sure as hell wasn't going to do anything. For the time being, Ellie tried to just focus on making dinner.

Sometimes it really pissed her off that she, as the woman of the house, was the one who always ended up cooking. Alan was always helpful, always willing to lend a hand and do anything she asked, but god forbid she ever decide to just not figure out what they were going to have for dinner, they'd all fucking starve. No, it was Ellie who had to plan out what was for dinner, come up with options for the week and go to Safeway and buy everything. And then she was also the one who had to organize the meal and, if anyone was there to help, tell each person what they were supposed to do. Why was she the one who always had to do all of that? The answer, as with most things, was the patriarchy, and the accepted reality didn't mean she was happy about it.

The simmering anger of a feminist helped her focus on chopping the vegetables while Alan stirred the sauce for the pasta. Ethan was making the salad and Hailey was monitoring the noodles. Everyone had a job, and Ellie managed to keep her mouth shut. For now.

But obviously that didn't last long. Alan opened the wine and everyone sat down at the table.

"This is great, Mom, thanks," Ethan said.

Ellie was pleased he remembered his manners. He was a good boy.

"Well, dig in," Ellie announced. This was not a house where anyone said grace before the meal. She vaguely knew that Alan was raised Catholic, but neither of them ever had any religion as adults, and Ellie hadn't raised her kids with anything either. It was better that way, she always thought. Find it as an adult if you want. Or else just focus on the science of the world. It had worked for her.

"Everything is delicious, Dr. Sattler," Hailey said politely.

"Oh sweetie, you can call me Ellie," she corrected gently. "I mean, don't get me wrong, I love being called Dr. Sattler, but—"

"Mhmm," Alan hummed in agreement, cutting her off.

She turned her attention to her fiancé, who happened to have been gorging himself on pasta. "What's that supposed to mean?" she asked accusingly.

"Are you forgetting the first time I called you Dr. Sattler? I seem to remember you liking it quite a bit," he said pointedly.

In truth, Ellie hadn't actually remembered that she and Alan started dating—for the first time—just as she finished up her Ph.D. He was her professor in the final semester before she defended her thesis, and they started seeing each other romantically shortly after that. Or during that. It wasn't really clear to her, actually, when they went from having dinner and drinks as a professor and T.A. and when those turned into dates. But Alan was right, the first time he'd called her Dr. Sattler, she'd gotten a little lost in it. Mostly it was the way he said it, with that tone of his voice. Ellie wasn't going to give details to her son and his girlfriend about it, but she definitely did remember that he'd called her Dr. Sattler while he took her clothes off and when he'd said it while he was inside her, she came on the spot.

Swallowing back the eroticism of those memories, Ellie simply said, "Yeah, that's true." She turned back to Hailey. "But anyway, we don't need to stand on any kind of formality in this house. I'm Ellie and he's Alan, and this is your home for as long as you want it to be."

The look on Hailey's face was one of deep relief. "Thank you," she said sincerely.

The table went quiet again as they all focused on their meal. This was the first dinner they'd all shared, and Ellie had hoped that this would become their new normal. It was strange having anyone other than just Alan with her during any meal at home, but it really was nice to have Ethan here. And Hailey. She was such a sweet girl. But there were more important things than just how sweet she was.

"So," Ellie began. "I think I should tell you that Alan and I—"

"Ellie," Alan warned, interjecting.

She gave him a look that told him she knew what she was doing and that he needed to leave her be. She turned back to Ethan and Hailey. "Alan and I were walking by your room when you were talking earlier. And I think it's important we get everything out in the open. I don't want either of you to feel like you have to hide anything. We want to be able to help you both however we can, and that means being honest with us. Ethan, is there anything you want to say?"

"No, I want to say something," Hailey said, piping up.

"Of course. Go ahead, Hailey. This is a safe space."

It did not escape Ellie's peripheral vision that Alan had rolled his eyes at that phrasing.

Hailey didn't notice or else didn't care. She took a determined breath. "So, I told Ethan earlier that I decided I don't want to have an abortion. I want to carry the baby to term. And then I want to give it up for adoption. I don't want to be a mom. I don't want a baby. I want to have my life and my career. And I've been thinking about it for weeks, ever since we found out I was pregnant. I'm not ready to settle down or have a family yet. And that's the whole point of coming to California, right? That I can choose to do whatever is gonna be best for me?"

"Absolutely," Ellie assured her. "I think that's a really brave and wonderful choice. And if you want or need to, you can always change your mind. But I think that's a good idea, that we go from here making sure your pregnancy is as simple and safe as we can so that you can have a healthy baby to give to someone who can give it a home."

Even as she said those words, even as she knew in her heart that those were the right words to say, Ellie was absolutely terrified. Hailey was barely three months along. She'd be pregnant until Thanksgiving, probably. That was a long time to put in all that care and effort just to give a baby up.

Ethan dropped his fork on the plate with a loud clang. "Can I say something?"

"Of course you can, sweetie," Ellie said gently. She already knew what he was going to say. He'd already said it. But maybe—hopefully—he'd changed his mind already.

"Could we work it out so that Hailey has the baby and gives it up but I get to keep it?" he asked.

Alan chimed in at that point. "What do you mean, 'keep it'?"

"Like…I'm his dad. Or her dad. Or their dad. Whatever. I mean, I want this baby. I want to be a dad to this baby. Can I do that?"

"I don't know…" Alan tried to say.

Ellie opened her mouth to interject, but Hailey was the one who spoke first. "What do you think that means for me?" she asked quietly. Quietly but dangerously. Ellie felt like she was holding her breath as Hailey continued, "You want to be a dad to our baby when I don't want to be its mom? How would that even work, Ethan? I couldn't handle that."

Once again, Ellie opened her mouth to speak, to support her son and to try and cut through the tension and disagreement brewing at the dinner table. But once again, she was beat to the punch. This time it was Ethan who said, "I think maybe let's figure out when we get there. We've got like six months before the baby comes. We don't have to decide now. I just…please don't promise the baby to anyone else, okay?"

Across the table, Alan looked to Ellie with wide, terrified eyes. He knew as well as she did that if Ethan was going to become a single father, he'd end up living here with his mother and stepdad. Ellie and Alan would be the ones raising this baby, more likely than not. It was a lot to contemplate.

"I think that's a good idea," Alan said, saving Ellie from having to figure out something diplomatic to say. "We'll just go from here, Hailey taking care of her pregnancy until the baby comes, and when we're closer to it, that's when you can decide for sure," he suggested.

It took everything in Ellie to not stand up and go across the table and kiss her fiancé square on the mouth. She certainly knew his kindness and rational intelligence as much or better than anyone else. But to have him cut through all of that stress right now and put everything in such an elegant way was just so like him.

Ellie decided to focus on that, on Alan who was so kind and intelligent and gorgeous. The fact that she might be a grandmother in a few short months was something she'd have to come to grips with later. If that ever did end up happening.