A/N: . Shit. People came out the wood works for Chapter 27. Ladies and Gents you came through clutch with the comments. They were so passionate, so long, just fucking amazing. Seriously, pretty sure this is the most I've ever gotten. And now for you all, a lengthy (at least for me) chapter. Enjoy! :)
A week. A very long, very boring, very interesting week. Regina and I still haven't made up, we haven't even come to a point of understanding. We can't seem to get past yelling at each other, or really, me yelling at her because Fuckrren is still living with her. But yet she expects to sit and listen while she throws out all these bullshit excuses? No, this is where you've got me fucked up, and she still hasn't told her mom about Colorado or not going back to Douche Face. Although, I guess he can't be blamed for all that's going on between Regina and I, he's just a hopeless doctor following his heart. Which as a doctor, dude has got a lot of days off.
However the upside to all of this is now I have tons of free time. Free time that I've been filling with things I wouldn't otherwise do. Like working out with Rachel and T, hanging out with Ethan, yes the same annoying Ethan. Fun fact, Call of Duty is not that bad, especially when you've got steam to blow off. I've also been hanging out with Zelena but I think that's just because she wants to see Belle. Those two have been so awkward around each it's actually kind of cute. I keep telling Belle it's obvious Zelena likes her but she's in denial, much like I was few months ago with Regina.
Aside from working out together, Rachel and I are quickly becoming close friends. Ivy and I hit it off right away. The best part is I don't feel like the third wheel. They kiss, they poke fun, they hold hands but it's never too much, it's never uncomfortable and with Ivy and I getting along so well it's hard to keep us from talking.
As I pulled into Roland's school parking lot I felt my phone vibrate in my pocket and for a moment I thought it might be Regina but then I thought about how she hasn't contacted me via phone since everything happened at that fuckfest of a dinner. I parked the bike and spotted Roland bouncing up and down while pointing at me to a woman I didn't recognize.
I waved before pulling out my phone then smiled once I saw Ivy's name pop up.
Don't forget, movies tonight and I've convinced Rachel to see that horror film you and I were talking about! Yay me!
Yes! Yay you! you've saved us. Trust me I haven't forgotten :)
Slipping the phone back in my pocket I took off my helmet, locked my bike and headed towards Roland. He let go of the woman's hand and ran over to me, jumping in my arms when he was close enough.
"Emma, you made it!" he said and I felt his smile on my neck.
"I did. I told you I'd be here." I replied as I dropped him to the ground.
"Come meet my mom." Roland wrapped his hand around mine and pulled me towards her. "So I signed us up for the three legged race." I glanced down at his innocent eyes.
"Oh did you, a little presumptuous are we?"
"Prez-zump-chu-is?" Roland sounded out as his eyebrows furrowed.
"It essentially means you do things without permission."
"Doesn't that just mean you're being bad?"
"Eh, not quite."
His frowned deepened and I knew this would be a long talk. Luckily we reached his mom so I didn't have to explain the intricacies of words beyond his years.
"You must be Emma, I'm Lexi. Roland talks about you all the time." She looked exactly like Roland, right down to the deep brown eyes.
"It's nice to meet you Lexi." we shook hands and exchanged smiles.
Hers was wide and her brown eyes twinkled, now I see where the kid gets his looks from. We carried on mild conversation, with Roland keeping his hand in mine and eventually adding Zelena, Marian and Robin to the mix. I was relieved that it was only us, the people that I actually like. I figured Regina wouldn't show up because of school but I wasn't sure about Cora. That is, until a silver Tesla pulled into the lot and that bitch stepped out of the car. An older man followed that I assume was Regina's dad, he made eye contact with me and then smiled, Cora on the other hand frowned.
"Just ignore her, it's what I do." Zelena replied, leaning in and bumping her shoulder against mine.
"Same." Marian added, low enough for only us to hear.
We chuckled among ourselves and I was grateful I didn't have to deal with this alone. There are plenty of people here for me to keep my distance from Cora. Sooner than I would've liked they joined the group and Cora jumped in the conversation, taking control of things as she normally did.
"Oh hello Emma, this is Henry. You didn't get a chance to meet him after you left in such a rush. Is everything okay?" Bitch, you know damn well everything is not okay. I couldn't even respond because she's got my blood boiling, al-fucking-ready.
"Hello Emma." Henry said, sticking out his hand. I shook it with my free one and after the pleasantries Cora once again propelled the topic of conversation towards Coach Robins wedding and talking about things Marian should be apart of but seems to be getting dismissed. However Coach would do the right thing, constantly asking her what she thought even if Cora didn't, he made her feel apart of the conversation.
Getting frustrated, Cora tried to pull Roland away from me but he hid behind my legs, obviously wanting to be around me more than her, really it seemed like more than anybody else. That's what she gets for being a cunt. People think kids don't see things, they see everything. Five more minutes had passed and as I saw adults with their kids head to the building that said 'GYMNASIUM' I wondered if we were going in anytime soon.
I took a step back from the group, pulling Roland with me. Dipping low, I went to ask him a question before a familiar engine purred into the lot. Dear Lord, please let that belong to anyone but her, however when Roland's face lit up like fireworks I knew, I just fucking knew. Taking the chance, I glanced up and sure as shit Regina was slipping out of the car looking elegant and flawless as always, next to her, which shouldn't surprise me was who? You guessed it, fucking Warren.
I have arrived, this is officially the fuckening. You know, when you've had some decent consecutive days meanwhile you're waiting for the other shoe to drop and then it finally does…that is it, that is the fuckening.
"Oh good, she was able to come." I heard Cora say to anyone who was willing to listen. The once excited Roland was now low in energy and he didn't even hide the scowl as Regina and Warren inched closer to us. The family began to walk to them, Roland pulled on my hand but I stayed rooted in my spot, ignoring his quizzical glare and focused on the skinny jeans painted on Regina's legs. A white loose fitting blouse flapped freely in the breeze causing her shirt to rise and it looks like I'm not the only one who's been working out.
Bending down on one knee I untangled my hand from Roland's, grabbed his shoulders and gave him a firm stare.
"Kid I need you to be one hundred percent honest with me right now, did Regina know I was going to be here?" I asked, attempting to hide the shrill in my voice.
"Not until last night." he replied shifting his gaze away from mine. "But Grandma Cora made me invite Warren." he said, his sudden dislike for the guy was showing through once more.
"Hey..." Gently, I tucked my fingers under his chin and brought his eyes back to me. "Why don't you like Warren?"
"Because you don't like him." he answered with ease and this made me frown.
I sighed, fixing the collar on his jacket before tugging on it, bringing our foreheads together.
"Listen to me, I don't not like Warren." I whispered, feeling the goosebumps rise on my skin and a shudder run down my spine. It's her, she's watching us.
"But-" he started, wrapping his hands around mine. "-You act like you don't like him and he made...he made you and Regina fight."
"No, he didn't make us fight." Because let's be honest, he didn't. "But here's the thing, even if I didn't like Warren doesn't mean you shouldn't like him. You must form your own opinion, make sense?"
"Sorta." then he shook his head. "No, not really."
Okay, I did not think I would be giving life lessons to a 5th grader today but I guess there's a first for everything.
"Name your favorite vegetable."
"Celery!" he answered, almost excited.
"Well guess what? I hate celery, it's stringy, it's got a weird taste and I especially hate celery with peanut butter!"
"What? Celery is the best with peanut butter."
"Na uh, not to me. Does this mean you hate celery now?"
He frowned then scratched his head in contemplation.
"No, I still like celery."
"Exactly. So when we use that example in Warren's case what's your opinion of him?"
"I guess...I guess he's okay."
I'll take it.
I let a crooked smile cross my lips before winking at him and standing up. Automatically my gaze drifted towards Regina, even through her sunglasses I feel her trying to read me. I was not prepared for this, I was hoping for a day where I didn't have to worry about my ex, that's what I'm calling her, she hasn't said it, I haven't said it but it feels we are. Her defined cheek bones clenched as she stared at me, only looking away when Warren had gotten her attention.
"Are we going to go over there?" Roland asked.
"I have to go to the bathroom, save me a seat inside okay?"
"Okay." He nodded his head with excitement. "The bathrooms are over there." a little finger pointed to an area near the gym and after I thanked him I took off in that direction. In the process, I slid out my phone and opened mine and Belle's thread.
Dude she's here with Warren…
What? Are you fucking kidding me, if you need me to tag along I will sacrifice missing class for you.
I laughed, knowing full well she just wants to see Zelena.
You would sacrifice that to see your fiery red head
The phone beeped in my hand but I didn't get a chance to look before I heard a deep voice yell 'watch out'.
"Watch out fo-" SMACK "FUCK!" I yelled as the ball bounced off my face and my hands shot to my nose.
"Oh my God, I'm so sorry." A firm grasp around my shoulders helped me up and when the guy removed my hands his blue eyes widened. "Oh shit, now I'm really sorry."
"What? Am I bleeding?" I asked, frantically touching underneath my nose but didn't feel any liquid.
"No, you're just really cute."
When my vision focused I saw the red tint on his cheeks. He looked like your typical California surfer guy. Long blonde hair down to his shoulders, energetic blue eyes and even with the chill in the air he was in a tank top, shorts, and flip flops.
"Oh, it's okay. I attract dangerous objects. If you knew how much I bumped into things on a weekly basis you wouldn't feel so bad." He laughed, his smile was gorgeous. Overall, he was a stunner.
"Well that doesn't change the fact that you're attractive. Danny..." he replied, sticking out his hand.
"Emma." I grasped it, watching Danny's face heat up again.
"That's a beautiful name."
Now it was my turn to blush.
"What brings you here?" he continued, ignoring the shouts of his friends and gazing at me.
Turning to find Roland I saw him and the group heading to the gym. Heading in my direction. Regina, who's glasses were now on top of her head, looked as though she wanted to chop the poor kid up and feed him to the fishes.
"You see that little boy walking with the older man in that group?" Danny gave me a short nod. "He invited me, a family friend."
"Well I'll have to thank this family friend." he replied with a twinkle in his eyes.
"Danny! Are you coming or what?" one his friends asked.
"Yes I'll be there in a minute!" he shouted then turned his attention back to me. "Hopefully I'll see you again?"
From the corner of my eye I saw Regina head's whip towards me. They were only a feet away, she probably heard. Fucking good, she deserves to hear this.
"Maybe..." I said with wink and Regina stopped, like literally stopped in her tracks. Zelena paused with her, reaching out a hand to shake her sister but it was slapped away. Yes, see how the fuck it feels. Without waiting for him to respond I continued my walk to the bathroom, slowly shifting into power walk as I heard Zelena say "Regina don't..."
My power walk shifted into a light jog and fuck if the sound of the heels didn't pick up as well…
Seeing the bathroom I rushed inside, relieved that all the stalls were empty. Quickly, I chose one but as I closed the door something, or rather someone pushed against it from the other side.
"Emma please talk to me." Regina begged, using more force than I expected, opening enough of a gap to slip in the stall with me. I rolled my eyes when I heard the lock slide shut and crossed my arms, already on the defense. Dark brown eyes found mine once she twirled on her shoes, it was only then I realized how small this stall was.
"I have to go to the bathroom Regina." I stated firmly.
"No you don't." No...I don't. "I'm not leaving until you talk to me, without yelling." she replied, raising an eyebrow and taking a step as if that would somehow make me back down. "Are you really talking with that boy?"
"Does it matter?" I shot back.
Dropping her head Regina began to play with the keys in her hand. Her shoulders fell and she shook her head.
"No, I guess it doesn't." Eyes filled with regret glanced up at me before returning to the ground. "I just thought you didn't like guys, I think you used the words 'puppy cute'."
"Don't do that." I said with a frown.
"Don't do what?" she asked, sculpted eyebrows furrowed and full lips, that I haven't kissed in forever, pursed.
"Don't reminisce like everything is copacetic between us."
"Copacetic?"
"Yes, copacetic, contrary to what some members in your family believe I'm not all that stupid." okay so maybe I'm dragging this out? I thought I was over Cora's remark but clearly I haven't let that shit go.
"Emma, God, I don't think you're stupid. I could never think that."
"No you just think I'm ridiculous." I replied, raising my voice.
Regina sighed as she covered her eyes with her hands while her head fell back. A breath of air was let out through puffed up cheeks as her hands continued to move, threading her fingers through curly brown locks.
"I don't-it's-" She started.
"I swear if you say it's fucking complicated one more time..."
"But..it is..." she said in a breathy whisper, I could see it in her face she could tell she was loosing me. Maybe she was. I'm so over this shit.
"Regina it's only complicated because you don't know what the fuck you want. I'm done beating a dead horse, I'm so fucking done. So unless you have answers to any of the questions I asked over the last week..." I paused, giving her chance to say something, anything, and when she didn't I huffed, pushed passed her and walked out of the bathroom.
My eyes burned from dry tears and a nauseating thought settled in the back of my mind that this actually might be it.
This might be the end of us.
Roland and I lined up near the yellow tape.
"Are you sure you're okay?" he asked. He passed me the rope and I bent down, tying our legs together.
"Roland, I promise I'm fine." Ugh, but I'm not. It's taking every ounce of my pride to stay here. Watching Doucherren try and hold Regina's hand or whisper in her ear or drape his arm over her shoulders was so infuriating. She would brush him off every once and awhile but not every time. I would think I made the right decision by blowing her off in the bathroom until she gives me this extremely convincing kicked puppy dog look.
Six, it's how many times she's tried to talk to me, coincidentally whenever Warren and Cora are not around. We already have to keep so many things a secret and yet she continues to do things around their backs. Here's what I don't get, if Cora already knows why in the fuck does it matter if she's talking to me? Warren seems to know Regina has taken a liking to me as a student…so, I'm lost.
Coach, Lexi, and Marian crouched down at the end of our lane near the finish line. Regina, Zelena, Warren Cora, and Henry stood behind them.
"Hey..." I jumped at the sound of Danny's voice coming up behind me. "Sorry, didn't mean to scare you, again." he replied, setting up in the lane next to us. A little boy with blonde hair and blue eyes, similar in height as Roland stood next to him.
"You're right, she is pretty." the kid said.
"Dude, seriously?" Danny hissed making me chuckle. He brought his shiny eyes back to me. "Sorry, little brothers. This is Jake."
"Hey Jake, my name is Emma."
Jake blushed then hid behind his brothers leg as a nimble thumb went in his mouth and he began chewing on his nail.
"He's a little shy around girls that are cute." Danny replied, sliding in the smooth compliment without struggle.
"That's the second time you've called me that. If I didn't know any better I'd say you were hitting on me." I countered. What the fuck am I doing? He's adorable but…
"That's because I am. Or I'm trying to anyway. Don't seem to be doing a very good job at it, though."
"No, you're doing just fine." I placed a hand on his shoulder and squeezed, in the same moment hearing a loud 'Fuck' near the finish line. Teachers, parents and students turned their heads in the direction but found nothing, I found it, it was in the form of an angry Regina stomping across the field.
I felt a tug on my sleeve and glanced down at Roland.
"Is she leaving?" he asked as his bottom lip quivered. Oh no, here come the waterworks.
"I don't know kid."
"But-but...I don't want her to leave." tears pooled in his eyes and I huffed. He's about to make me chase after this damn woman. "Emma, you have to do something."
"Okay...just.." fuck. "Just wait right here, okay? Don't move."
Untying the knot I made, I slipped out of the rope, keeping my head on a swivel I scanned the bodies for Regina's figure but the crowd was getting dense the closer it got to the start of the race. Finding a referee I ran over to him and asked for five to ten more minutes, he said yes, and I took off in the direction she charged of to.
No, she wasn't on the field. Damn it. Where could she have gone? I spun around in a circle when my ears caught the sound of Regina's Porsche starting up. Sprinting off towards the parking lot Regina had her arm thrown over the passenger seat with her head cranked to the back as she began to reverse. The car was almost out of the spot before I slammed my hands on the hood, almost hitting my shins against the front bumper. Brown hair flipped as she whipped her head around, startled at first and then annoyed. 'Move' Regina mouthed but I shook my head no. Her eyes rolled and she did it again.
"I can sit here all day and do this." I shouted.
Soon the Porsche died down and with force Regina unlocked the door, shoving it open. Stepping out, she shot me a glare with those piercing brown eyes.
"Emma, move." her stern voice caught me off guard but I held my ground.
"No."
"I'm serious."
"So am I."
Frustrated, she threw her hands in the air and turned away from me. Slowly I let mine off the hood and stepped up behind her.
"Stop, just don't come any closer." she mumbled, the breeze almost took it away before my ears picked up on her words. But like she ignored my wishes I dismissed hers, taking the final step and placing both of my hands on her shoulders. She moaned, legitimately moaned, automatically causing my fingers to dig in the thin fabric. "Emma..." my name rolled out in a heated whisper and I bit my lip to stop my own reactions.
"Roland wants you here, I think we can put aside our bullshit for a few more hours, don't you?"
Caution hugged her body as she turned around to face me, my hands slipped off her shoulders and the cold seeped through.
"I can't, not with you flirting with-and-I...it-I know I have no room to talk but-it just-."
My hands shot out to cup her face, apparently they have a mind of their own today. She froze, jaw clenching underneath my fingertips.
"This is not about us. Roland wants you here, so please stay." I stared at the somber brown eyes and it was only then I noticed the small bags underneath from lack of sleep. Regina grasped around my waist, pulling me in closer. The cells in my body hummed from her touch and again, it would be so easy just to fall back in her arms.
"I miss you so much Emma." her nose brushed against mine as our shallow pants mingled in the small gap between us.
"I know." I whispered. "This, this doesn't change anything though." Reluctantly I dropped my hands from her face and wrapped them around her wrists, removing the firm hold on my hips. "I have to go set up for the race, you better be at the finish line." I demanded before walking back to Roland.
When he saw me pop through the crowd his frown deepened. The ref told me to hurry up and I glared at him. Like dude fucking calm down, you are making sure kids don't cheat at a three legged race. Your job is not that serious.
"She'll be here, I promise." I said in encouraging tone once I neared Roland. But I shouldn't be making promises on something that I don't have any control over because truthfully I have no idea if she'll come back. I tied the rope much like I had before and when I looked up Regina was standing in her previous spot next to Zelena. Roland waved frantically at her and she smiled back but was quickly replaced by pursed lips.
"Hey do you have a hair tie I can borrow?" Shifting my gaze, Danny beamed his perfect smile at me and for some unknown reason I blushed.
"Yea, just one second." Fishing one out of my pocket I handed it over and he winked. A chuckle bubbled from my chest as he slung his hair around and wrapped it in a bun. "You know not every guy can pull off the man bun look, you do it very well."
And when I didn't think his smile could get any bigger, it did.
"It's been said that my hair brings good luck." Danny bent over and I rubbed my fingers across it.
"So this means I'll win now?" I teased as he stood up and straightened out his shirt.
"No, it's good luck for me, bad luck for you." His eyes darted to Roland. "You're going down little man."
"Na uh, you're going down." he shouted with a smile.
"Not if we get there first." Jake countered, sticking his tongue out causing Roland to do the same. Danny and I chuckled at their little tiff, kids are adorable…sometimes.
"See, look what you've started." I joked and he just shrugged his shoulders.
"Prove me wrong then."
"Oh, I intend to."
Straightening up Roland and I put our tied leg behind us and dominant leg out front.
"Remember-" I said, whispering in Roland's ear. "Walk like penguin."
"Got it." he replied, eyebrows furrowed in concentration.
He slipped his arm around my waist and I put mine over his shoulder. I would've focused on the finish line as well, if my eyes hadn't caught Regina's bottom lip tucked in between teeth as her arms wrapped around her body. The jealousy she's trying to control is obvious, to me anyway, and maybe to Zelena who placed her hand on Regina's back, guiding her away from my view.
"Racers, take your marks." yelled the ref. Okay, time to focus. "Get ready..." everyone crouched down. "Set..." Oh come on dude. "Go!"
Everyone took off except Roland and I, he went to sprint but I held him back. "Just watch..." I said with a teasing grin and as the words left my mouth people started to drop like flies from lack of coordination, they were taken out in the first few meters. As partners stopped to readjust themselves that's when we began to move. First, this kid is fast, second, I feel dumb as fuck running like this, third, the training sessions with Rachel and T are paying off, fourth, we are one hundred percent gaining on Danny and Jake. Shoulder to shoulder we ran and he had to do a double take, I smiled then winked as Roland carried us to first place and across the finish line.
"We did it!" he shrieked. After loosening the rope enough for us to slip out he jumped in my arms as the family crowded around us, except Regina and Zelena. Skimming through the crowd I saw them sitting in the grass facing each other. Regina had one shoved hand in her brown hair and the other mindlessly pulling out grass then throwing it down beside her. Eyebrows were in a permanent scowl, her lips moved tightly over her teeth as she spoke. "Can we go over there?"
I looked at Roland who had obviously been watching me the whole time. I can't say no, around him it's almost impossible.
"We can, you're walking though." I joked to hide the nerves pulsing inside. After I set him down he dragged me over to the person I really didn't care to see right now. Zelena was first to notice us, tapping Regina's knee then pointing when she got her attention. Regina shifted those fucking ridiculously sad eyes our way, stood up and dusted off her jeans. He finally let go of my hand, running towards her with his arms wide open. I hung off to the side, next to Zelena who bumped her shoulder against mine.
"Can you please give her a break. She's been trying talk to you all week."
"No she's been spitting bullshit all week." I hissed. "She doesn't even know what she wants."
"Emma, she misses you like crazy." Zelena urged. I slowly shook my head, shifting my gaze off Regina's ass and to those intense eyes beside me.
"You don't get to make me feel bad for this, I have a right to be upset." I felt the annoyance rising all over again.
"You absolutely have the right. Regina is being so fucking stupid right now, I'm just over the moping, and the tears, and the-"
"Wait." I said cutting her off. "The tears?"
"Uh yea? She's not made of stone."
Tears? Regina, crying? Over us? That does not sound like her.
"She hasn't even acknowledged that what she's doing is wrong but you want me to talk to her, right." I scoffed and folded my arms.
"Not what I'm saying at all, I'm requesting that you try not to yell at her right off the bat."
"Is that what she said?" I chuckled dryly, darting my eyes to Regina.
"She said you get very passionate, I can only deduce that to yelling."
"I'll tell you like I told her, if she can come to me with real answer then I'll listen otherwise, I'm done." I shrugged my shoulders as if I didn't care and walked off.
My body was steaming as memories of us hit me harder than a tsunami. Digging the phone out of my pocket a heavy sigh escaped from lungs, frustrated as hell that time wasn't moving faster.
Missing Regina comes in waves.
Tonight, I'm drowning.
The events of today have set me back thousands of steps. Seeing Regina broken and miserable was tough, Roland constantly asking questions about us and not having answers for him was tough, letting Danny down at the end of the day was touch, even though he was a good sport, but this horror movie with Rachel and Ivy would hopefully do me some good. Although if the way my hand clung around the key Regina had given at Christmas was any indicator it might not. This woman has got me all fucked up in the head.
"Emma!"
But I can't think like that now.
With a forced smile I looked up as Rachel was running towards me. We greeted each other in a hug before she looped her arm under mine.
"Aren't we missing one?" I asked.
"Yea, I told Ivy not to leave campus for lunch, but did she listen?" she rolled her eyes and shook her head. "Of course not. And guess what happened?"
"She got sick?"
"Dude, chicken nuggets everywhere."
I gagged. That's a gross image, chunky, lumpy chicken and you know it had to smell horrible.
"I can see that happening. Oh no-" I said in mock horror. "-I can't stop seeing it." Rachel laughed as I shuddered and she handed me the printed out ticket.
"So now it's your job to hold me since you wanted to see this crazy movie." She mumbled, pulling me inside. We handed our tickets to the young woman before following the directions she gave us to our theater. "I'll get the seats while you grab the food? The movie is about to start and I want to make sure I find us two, together."
Nodding as my reply she took off leaving me to push thoughts of Regina out of my mind. It's frustrating because I'm letting this shit between us ruin my night and she's not even here. I just need to let it go. Pulling out my phone, who seems to be my best friend today, I opened my thread with Ivy, giving her shit for not being here. We messaged back and forth until I got the counter, ordering Rachel and I a large popcorn, an extra large soda, and Milk Duds. You can't go to the movies and not have Milk Duds. Paying with the money mom gave me I moved as fast as the objects would let me to our theater, grateful there was a woman exiting just as I was entering.
Thanking her, I walked up the pathway, rounded the corner and skimmed the crowd, searching for Rachel. It was packed, my eyes gazed over almost every face before a hand waving in the air grabbed my attention. She was sitting in the middle section, second seat from the end, perfect. I prefer the end. I jogged up the steps then sat down with a dramatic sigh.
"Maybe we can add some stairs to our workouts." I huffed, attempting to catch my breath. She chuckled and reached over to grab a handful of popcorn.
"Don't be a wuss it was three half inch steps."
Playfully I tossed a kernel at her and she giggled, chucking one back at me. The lights dimmed and the dispersed chatter quieted down. Already Rachel was leaning against me and I couldn't help the laugh that escaped. She gave me an evil glare before taking my arm and wrapping it over her shoulder, we smiled at each other as the loud bass from the preview rumbled through out. We got comfortable as another late comer ran up the steps and slid in the row behind me.
"Sorry I'm late." and a powerful shudder hit my spine at the hushed words.
Are. You. Fucking. Kidding. Me?!
Just...why? Fucking why?
There was a kick to the back of my chair.
"Oh, I'm so sorry." she whispered, like I needed confirmation that it was Regina sitting right behind me.
"Oh my God." another familiar voice. Fucking Zelena? Did she not recognize me while the lights were on?
"Shhh!" said a member from the other side of the theater. Yes, shhh!
"What?-" Regina whispered.
"Nothing, just watch the previews." her sister quickly replied.
My ears didn't pick up on any other words but my body came alive with tingles. She was looking at, really looking at me, trailing across the arm I was holding Rachel with.
"You're not leaving. Sit here and watch." Zelena hissed.
I hunched down in my seat, getting a curious look from Rachel. I sent her a reassuring smile and kissed her temple, because yea, we can do things like that now and it's not weird. A sigh full of frustration and jealously hugged my ears.
"The movie hasn't even started yet and your already getting scared?" Rachel teased.
"Don't judge."
"Too late." she replied, resting her head on top of my shoulder, soon followed by a gentle kick to the back of my chair. Is she serious right now? My nostrils flared as my eyes fluttered shut. Woosah, woosah, happy thoughts, I can't let her get to me, she's just being childish. I counted to three then opened as the movie started with an opening scene of a girl on Skype, with the film being shot from the point of view of a computer screen.
I've been wanting to see this movie for the longest, now I can't even focus with Regina's perfume hovering around me. The further along the movie goes the deeper Rachel sinks into me, sometimes she'd jump, sometimes she'd cover her eyes and watch through spaced fingers, sometimes she'd dive her head in the crook of my neck. Each time Regina would tap the back of my chair.
"Hey, I need to go to the bathroom." I whispered. Air, fresh air, only for a few minutes.
"Are you seriously going to leave me? This shit is getting crazy."
I rolled my eyes, attempting to move my arm but she kept a firm grasp on it.
"We're only fifteen minutes in, nobody has even died yet."
"You get five minutes, ten if you have to poop." her tone was unwavering and her eyes were serious. Still, I chuckled, removing my arm and quietly rushed down the stairs. Weaving through the bodies on this crazy Friday night I reached the fresh air, taking in a deep breath like I wasn't outside only twenty-five minutes ago.
Walking around the theater I leaned against the wall and slid down to the ground.
"Why is this so fucking difficult..." my words were spoken to no one in particular but I gazed at the sky as if an answer would float down.
Out of the corner of my eye a piece of paper fluttered to the ground. Curious, I glanced, recognizing it as one of Regina's birthday coupons. Beyond that black heels were glued to the cement, I didn't need to continue dragging my eyes up to know who it was.
"I would like to cash in a coupon." Regina's hopeful words rose the anxiety tumbling inside. It's safe to say we're alone, no school, no family, no friends, just us and the pedestrians walking by oblivious to our squabble.
"Have you been walking around with that in your pocket all week?" I questioned, slightly amused.
"Actually, yes." So I'm nervous, it's been awhile since we've been together like this, without shouting at each other. "Please?"
"Which one is it?" It would have been just as easy for me to read it myself but no, she's got to work for this.
"Thirty minutes of interrupted talk time." She sat down beside me, bringing her knees up to her chest. "Do you accept?" Regina coolly asked.
"I don't have thirty minutes, I barely have five."
"Then can I have the barely five minutes?"
I leaned my head against the wall and rolled it to the side, adamant brown eyes full of determination gazed back at me. Hesitating with a quick bite to my lip I nodded and watched the relief flood over her tired features.
"I'm surprised Warren isn't here." following you around like a lost puppy. Her jaw clenched as she looked off to the side.
"Him and I, we're taking some time apart."
"You don't seem too happy about that." I replied, standing up because I don't think I can hear her tell me she's still in love with him. Graceful but quick, Regina got to her feet and blocked me from heading back inside. "Stop running away from me." she took a step at an angle, backing me up against the wall. "I'm not happy because I let him come between us, I'm not happy because I made you doubt us, I'm not happy because I hurt you." Her eyes slid to the key resting in between my breasts, momentarily glazing over with lust and dragged over the leather coat before meeting me again.
I strained to keep my lips from pulling up as I took in her reactions of being this close to me. Even now, with the unknown outcome of our relationship our bodies are still drawn to each other.
"Warren knows, everything. My mom, she knows how I feel...about you, about us, and she knows where she can shove her opinion." Regina continued, and her comment almost made me laugh. Almost.
"No, I know what I saw at the family picnic today. He was all over you."
"No, what you saw was him trying to control the jealously raging inside me, that young man would not give up so easily when it came to you."
Should I believe this?
"Is he still living with you?" I aked as indifferent as I could.
"No, he moved out a few days ago." lifting her hands, she placed her palms flat against the wall, trapping me as she inched forward. This scenario feels oddly familiar, could it be a hot reminder of that one fateful night outside the gym during my first volleyball game? When she was trying to explain her feelings for me; physically we're in the same position, mentally so much has changed.
Was this us coming full circle?
"What I've been trying to tell you is that I care for you both. Am I in love with Warren? No, absolutely not. Did I consider getting back with him? Yes, only because with him, things were easy." the honesty of her words struck a territorial cord deep within me and I knew all it would take was a finger gliding over her clit to stake my claim. She nibbled on her lip and glanced away, the muscle in her neck protruded and I visualized stroking my tongue over it, the noises that she'd make, how her skin would rise with goose bumps as my fingers danced across her firm and defined stomach, and her hips, they would for sure being rolling against mine. "I didn't have to worry about looking over my shoulder, or keeping secrets from my friends and family, I didn't have to think about where we kissed or when we kissed, or who saw us holding hands in public. The only reason him and I broke up was because he was waiting to get transferred out of New York, if it weren't for that we would still be together. But all it would be is easy and easy is boring. Him and I, we were okay. I care for him because he's helped become the person I am today. He supported my dreams, he taught me how to be understanding, he taught me a lot about personal growth and for that I am grateful but it wasn't the confusing, magnetizing, unforgettable feeling you always hear about. We were floating in the nuances of sameness. We were stuck in these roles and couldn't break out of them." Regina took another look at the key.
"So, is that why you moved?" I asked, doing my best not to glance down her shirt.
"That and to get even further away from my mother, which is a whole another coupon's worth in itself."
"Maybe you should've stayed there." I replied bitterly, dismissing her joke and shifting my gaze from the distracting cleavage to the cracks in the sidewalk.
"But then I would not have fallen in love with you." she said with confidence, climbing her hands up the wall as she placed herself in between my shoes and pressed her forehead against my temple. My eyes fluttered shut as heat coiled in my stomach and shot around my body at an alarming rate, coming across as a blush. "Look at me."
I did, because I missed her, I missed this.
Regina has never stared at me with so much care, love, and passion. Keen eyes studied the red tint crossing my skin. "I yearn for you, my body aches for only you. I think of ways to make you laugh, next week, next month, six years from now. Seeing how much I've hurt you..." Slowly Regina shook her head as her eyebrows furrowed. "...I want to make it better, I need to make it better." In quick and subtle movements she brushed her cheek against mine, honestly I made no attempt to move. We both took in shuddered breaths from the contact and I swallowed the hot lump when she placed one of her hands at the base of my throat. Goosebumps spread across my body like gasoline being dumped on a raging forest fire. "This thing between us is intense, it's electric, it's raw, it's like nothing I have ever experienced. I'm so sorry for making you question my love for you. You're absolutely right, how I handled the situation ever since that stupid dinner was wrong. I should've stuck up for you instead of letting my mom get in my head. Warren moving in was idiotic, I only did it because he doesn't have family out here and it didn't make sense for him to pay for a hotel for 2 weeks when he could just stay with me, which I realize if the situation were reversed I would be livid." Her hand snaked across my collarbone and down my arm leaving trails of bumps and my heart fluttering when she intertwined our hands, pulling them up and holding them over her heart. "This is yours Emma, nobody can take that away from you. These feelings I have for you are real and I will do everything in my power to never make you question them again."
The tip of her nose brushed against the side of my face, hot breath danced around the shell as my eyes closed for a moment. "Plus, nobody has ever made me flush with excitement the way you do." Oh that was a cheap shot and it's totally working. "Nobody has ever made my body react like this..." she trailed off, raising our locked fingers and stroked the back of my hand down the length of her neck. Regina shuddered at the contact, tiny goosebumps formed at the junction of her neck and shoulders as her legs trembled. With a quiet sigh she laid her head on my shoulder, releasing a long breath. "I'm sorry for everything." She tilted her head as she spoke, her lips moved against my throat and the heat pooled in the bottom of stomach causing an almost unbearable strain in my pants. "When my mom started talking about all the things that could go wrong, I got scared. You and I know the cons of our relationship, they are screaming in our faces everyday but hearing it from someone else was just..."
"You were scared of what would happen to you?"
She pulled back, tears that were waiting to be shed glossed over dark brown eyes.
"Yes but more importantly what could happen to you. If this were to get out it's not just me, you would be labeled. It could ruin your future, you would become this statistic, people would look at with revulsion and detestation. Cameramen and reporters would be knocking on your door, you could be the center of a huge scandal and the media would serve it on a platter while the world eats it up. This could compromise any chance you have to get a stable job because now you're that person. Which is also why I considered moving with Warren to Colorado." She bit her lip, taking in a stuttered breath through her nose. "But the thought of just giving up, Emma-" Regina pressed her forehead against mine as her other hand wrapped around our clasped ones. "-If I lose you, I've lost everything. Please tell me I haven't lost you."
I have never looked at our relationship from that perspective. The entire time I've been thinking of what could happen to her not even taking into account how everyone would view me. How they would judge me solely based off the things they have heard. In a weird, dumb fucking way she was trying to protect herself and she was trying to protect me.
"I don't understand why you didn't tell me all this in the beginning." I don't know why, but I tilted my head up. The electric current that pulls us together fizzled in the space between our lips, it makes my body vibrate with want.
"Because I'm really bad at communication and instead of putting faith in our bond I lashed out. The way I talked to you, it was uncalled for and not fair to you at all. I, um, hope that in the future we can work out our problems without immediately yelling or running away from one another."
In the future?
"So..." I started, noticing her lips quiver from the proximity of mine. "You still want this?"
"It's you that I want, little one." my eyebrows furrowed at the name she had given me. "What? You don't like when I call you that?" she asked with concern. "I won't if makes you uncomfortable."
"No, I may like it too much..." I trailed off, cascading my eyes down to our clasped hands. The constant pulse of tingles ran up my arm and settled deep in my chest.
"I know I've exceeded my barely five minutes but, I really want to kiss you." Her unasked question hung in the tense air, she looked at me with pining yet frazzled eyes. "Can I?"
Yes, yes, fuck yes…
"I'm not sure that's a good idea..." I replied instead. The rejection was visible. Regina nodded, biting her lip so hard that I was surprised she didn't draw blood.
"Okay..." for her, the realization was sinking in that we still had a lot to talk about. "Okay..." she repeated, sighing heavily. "Okay..." this time barely above a whisper, more to herself than to me. But Regina didn't back away and I can't blame her because neither can I. We just stayed like this, with our lips hovering maybe a quarter of an inch apart, if that.
"I should go back inside, Rachel is in there. She doesn't like scary movies and I know I'm already in for some serious tongue lashings." the words flew out of my mouth and reality once again settled in.
I felt the squeeze of her hand tightening around mine as she gazed down the street and soft brown hair teased my nose. I took in a quiet breath savoring the smell of the familiar hair product.
"Are you two, you know, together?"
A huge part of me wants to make Regina sweat, make her wait, make her wonder, just like she did to me. But I'm not her, I know what the fuck I want.
"No." I whispered. "I should still get back in there, though." My hand dropped from hers as she took a step pressing my back firmly against the wall, shaky fingers hooked through my belt loops and she began to mold her body against mine. A throaty gasp reached my ears after an involuntarily twitch was felt in the center of my pants. "It doesn't mean we're done with this conversation." I encouraged, lifting my hands and resting them on the small of her back. She relaxed instantly and relief flooded through her but a frown remained. "Hey, I feel like I just gave you some really good news. Would it kill you to smile?"
"Smile?" she questioned.
"Yes! Fucking smile, stop being so 'woe is me'." I exclaimed. Her head dropped to the side, perfect teeth came out to nibble on the already abused bottom lip. She lifted her chin, locking eyes with me. We stared at each other, welcoming and open. She studied me like a blind man seeing the sunrise for the first time and the smile reached her eyes before it fell crooked on her lips. The hard lines in her face decreased, softening her edgy features and she raised an eyebrow as though she were entertained before a slow wink was sent my way.
"How's that?" Regina asked, blushing at the way I was drinking her in.
"Much better." I smiled, gently pushed her off me and walked back inside the movie theater.
The glares and hushed whispers I received when I returned to my seat were fucking constant. Honestly, I don't even know how Rachel watched the movie, she was contorted in a such that she was almost laying down. However all was forgiven when I promised the rest of the milk duds and permission to jump or hold me how she sees fit. She did not pass up this opportunity. When she would squeal or jump Regina's light chuckle would reach my ears, I couldn't tell if she was teasing Rachel or if she found her adorable, probably a combination of the two.
After the movie I proceeded to give her mass amounts of shit, she blamed me for not being there for most of it.
"We should've just paid for one ticket, you were essentially in my lap the whole time anyway." I teased, nudging the top of my shoulder against hers.
"Shut up." she replied, poking out her bottom lip. "I would've been fine if you didn't abandon me."
"I had to poop!" I shouted, ignoring the snickers around us, truthfully not giving a fuck. The friends you can talk about pooping with are the ones that are there for life, so fuck them. "When nature calls you can't help but answer."
"Well time your nature calls better." she added a gentle punch to my chest, or tried to, I caught it with ease then pulled her in for a hug. "I'm sure you have a lot of people helping you already but if you need any more for tomorrow let me know."
"Will do." I replied before letting her go, saying goodbye then breaking off our separate ways.
I took out my phone, immediately going to Regina's name. Should I call her? Wait for her to call me? Deciding on the latter I went to place my it back in my pocket before I felt it vibrate continuously in my hand. A smirk tugged on my lips as I glanced at the name.
"Hey..." I answered.
"Look to your left." Regina urged. My head jerked and a chuckle danced across the line. "Your other left."
Don't even know my right from my left. Cool story Emma.
I glanced to my actual left and blushed when I saw her broad smile with Zelena cackling behind her. Hanging up the phone, I walked over to them, not seeming too eager but not giving off resting bitch face either.
"Are you sure you're suppose to be in high school?" Zelena whipped out.
"You're an ass." I countered just as a quick but it only deepened her laugh, causing her to double over and hold her stomach.
"Oh this one is fast Regina." she said after catching her breath. "Now I'm going to let you crazy kids talk. Regina, I'll be in the area, just call when you're ready."
"You didn't drive?" I asked, drifting my gaze to hers.
"No." she replied.
Don't do it Emma.
"Well, I can take you home." I offered. "You are close to my house anyway."
"I'd like that a lot." she replied, trying to hide the smile that leaked her emotions.
"Great, then I'll go home and catch up on my beauty sleep while you two..." she made a peace sign then brought it to her face as she stuck her tongue out and flicked it back and forth.
"Zelena!" Regina scolded. She attempted to push her but her sister dodged it and walked off, yelling 'bye bitches' in the process. I chuckled as Regina shook her head in embarrassment. "I'm sorry about that, she's so crude sometimes."
"It's okay..." I replied, shoving my hands in the comfy leather pockets. The tense air building once again because neither of us know how to act around each other.
"Do you want to go to the park?"
"Sure."
Awkward silence.
Damn, is this how it's going to be from now on? The words stuck on the tip of our tongues as we hesitate to say something that might offend the other. Regina led the way while I stayed a step behind her, the different sounds that make downtown come alive at night faded as we crossed the street and shuffled through the grass. I glanced down at her heels, worried she might be a little out of her element but she didn't seem bothered by it. We passed by street lights that lit up a basketball court, giving me a chance to see the concentrated expression dented in her face. Slowing down I came to stop and waited her for to notice that I wasn't following. Regina took a few more steps before glancing back then doing a double take, noticed me and turned around.
"Is everything okay?" she took a step closer and I nodded.
"You're just really quiet." I replied, watching her body tense up.
"I don't really know where to go from here."
"Okay..." and here the fuck we go. "Here's what I have a problem with..." I kept my voice controlled and leveled. "Warren may pop in and out of your life but your mom seems like she's constantly hovering over you. The way you were able to dismiss me as easily as you did at dinner gives me doubts. Honestly so does Warren. It's safe to assume you grew up in Boston together?" Regina nodded. "And then you moved to New York and he followed and then you moved to California and here he is and when it was possible that you were moving to Colorado he was quick to jump on that opportunity."
She didn't answer right away, not until I handed over the proverbial mic by motioning for her to talk with my hands.
"My mom is a tough woman who tries really hard to live her life vicariously through me. Of course she loves Zelena as well but my mom had her at a difficult time, a time she tries really hard to forget about. Eventually she met my successful dad and had me, something of fresh start. Unlike Zelena, I never had to want for anything. I went to the best schools, I got the best tutors, I got the fashionable clothes, I'm sure you can fill in the rest. But with this came an overwhelming need to always please my mom because she never stopped reminding me who had given me everything. I was so tired of it, as soon as I graduated I moved to New York, got a job, paid my way through school and some with Warrens help, fast forward years later and I met you. I was fine, finally out of mothers grasp but somehow being at the dinner and seeing Warren just threw me off, bringing me right back to how I use to be."
She sighed and shook her head, taking a step closer.
"I told her she didn't have to worry about hearing from me until she could show some respect. She told me if I didn't stop this 'silly infatuation' then I would be cut off. Marian, Robin, and Zelena were there, so, you know, witnesses." Shoving her hands in her back pockets, Regina began to rock back and forth on her feet, a movement she did whenever she was nervous. It's rare but it does happen.
"Cut off?" I frowned in confusion.
"Yes, from money."
"Wait, you're broke?" It's possible I'm panicking a little, that was not my intention.
"No, I'm not broke, your concern is intriguing though." Tilting her head to the side an eyebrow raised and again the heat billowed in the pit of my stomach.
"Stop that." I replied.
"Stop what?" Regina countered, finding some courage and taking a few more paces towards me, leaving us an arm's length apart.
"You know what. What did Warren say when you told him?" Redirecting the conversation I hoped that bringing him up would crack the buzzing sexual tension between our vibrating bodies.
"Originally I told Warren that I was seeing someone and what we use to have was in the past. He was angry, not aggressive angry but confused and sad." Yes, I know the feeling. "He said a few choice words before he kept asking who it was, if it was guy or girl, did he know them, he just came saying 'Who is it? Who is it?' and finally, I blurted your name out."
"Oh, do you think he'll do anything to..."
"Out us? No. Warren is upset but he would never hurt me, he just wished I would've told him sooner. In fact, he thought something was up between us. Apparently I don't hide my affection for you very well." a shy grin crossed her face and a red tint spread over her chest and ran up her neck. "He's still moving to Colorado, he only followed me from state to state because I gave him a reason to."
"And now?" I pressed.
Regina closed the distance, her hand came up and she grazed her knuckles over the key.
"And now, I don't. Love is many things, one thing it can not be is unsure. Here is what I know with absolute certainty; you plague my thoughts, you've taken a piece of my heart and now I can't imagine going through this crazy thing called life without you. I wonder how I got this far without ever knowing you."
I scoffed, it was light but still had some hesitation behind it. "You're being cheesy."
"I'm being honest." her reply was swift and firm.
"You know..." I sighed, surprising her by placing my hands on her shoulders and gliding them up the side of her neck. "I really hate how poetic you are."
She stayed quiet, soaking in the feeling of my simple touch.
"Can I ask you something?" a whisper so low I nearly missed it.
"Yes." My curiousity is peaked, not for long thought as her fingers slid down my ribs, dipped under my shirt and brushed against my skin. I melted into her touch, missing it's absence.
"Earlier I asked you if I had lost you. Did I?"
"No." I answered with zero time to think about. "I mean for a moment maybe, but no. You couldn't lose me."
A sigh of relief broke the unwanted tension but sparked our desire for each other.
"Now look who's being corny." she teased through a soft chuckle.
"Yea well, I learn from the best." I replied, stroking her hair and enjoyed the sounds of contentment floating from her luscious lips. "So, I'm throwing a surprise party for Belle's birthday tomorrow. You should come."
"I don't think that would be a good idea."
"It will be fine..." Knowing I have the upper hand I leaned in and brushed my nose against hers. "It's only going to be the volleyball team, my parents, Belle's parents, of course Killian, Ruby, and Jefferson. Coach will be there, Zelena will be there and Belle is a promising young student of yours, you're could be there for moral support. It also doesn't hurt that you and Coach are related." I smirked at the moan she accidentally slipped out. "It will be fun, we can hang out, just, think about it." I pulled back, deciding that was enough torture, at least for now.
"Okay, I'll think about it. Maybe we should get me back to my house." Regina rushed out, looking everywhere but me. "It's getting late."
Victorious!
Cupping her cheeks I forced her conflicted brown eyes towards me.
"Honestly, I'm not in that big of a rush. Are you?"
Her lips curved up into a smile that's been lying dormant for quite some time, unable to find a use for itself until now.
"No, not at all."
A/N: We're on the mend! As always I hope you enjoyed. Also got a PM asking if I was going to put any of my social media platforms. I wasn't but if you want to find me post it in the comments (I only use IG) , or don't lol. I'm shibby either way! Stay awesome everyone and stay warm, the temperature dropped from 99 to 55 like it saw a state trooper.
Til Next Time...