"Wait, wait, wait," Sam held up a hand, his brows pulled together quizzically. "You're telling me that she not only ASKED you to spank her, but she didn't fight you AT ALL? Is she broken?"

The brother's were sitting in the living room, a western flick on the TV in front of them, beers in hand, taking some time to catch up and hang out. Emily had excused herself after dinner, Sam had picked her up a copy of the next book in a series she was reading and she had told them she was going to drown herself in bubbles and enjoy the first few chapters, which gave them some time alone; a rarity these days. Dean chuckled in response, taking a long pull on his bottle of beer before leaning back.

"Yeah, man, it was very out of left field. I don't know, maybe it's getting through to her finally? Or maybe we did break her," he paused thoughtfully. "You know man, I think maybe I'm starting to...feel something for her. I can't explain it. I've been viewing her as this annoying little sister type, and she is a huge pain in the ass, don't get me wrong, but then we started sleeping together, and now I can't stop imagining it. Imagining a life with her, you know?"

It wasn't often that they had these kind of heart to hearts, and Sam looked a little uncomfortable as Dean opened up to him, feeling a small twinge of jealousy run through his veins that he couldn't deny. But more then that, he had known it was going to end up this way, somewhere in their journey together something that clicked in place between the two of them, something Sam didn't have her. Pushing the feeling aside, Sam gave a small shake of his head and mimicked Dean's pose, leaning back against the couch.

"Sure, Dean," he finally answered, looking to his brother with a bit of sadness in his eyes. "I get that totally. She's a gorgeous girl, she's got the attitude in her that you always seem to go for, and we're in a situation where we kind of have nowhere else to go. She's stuck with us for the long haul. But you know, can you handle it? Handle her? What she is?" He paused, holding his hand up because he could see Dean gearing up on the defense. "I don't mean that I don't think you can handle her, dude. Clearly you can if she went from that little hellcat we picked up in a bar six months ago, to her legit asking you to spank her when she fucked up, but I mean, the Nephilim stuff. The fact that you can't enter a room without every person there wanting her. Knowing you'll never have your family with her? There's no white picket fence in that future. It's not like with Lisa, and Ben," Dean flinched at their names, so hard that it immediately sent a wave of guilt through Sam. "I'm sorry, I don't mean to bring them up, but you know what I'm saying right? You had a whole life with them, the normal job, the normal family, the house and the dog and the American Dream. A woman who didn't know anything about your other life, who was just happy to be with you. What happens if this goes south for you guys? It's not like she can just...leave, you know? And you definitely won't be leaving this life when she'll be attracting Demons to her everywhere you go. You'll never have that life with Emily."

Sam had clearly spent some time thinking this out, which Dean could appreciate. But taking in what he said proved to be a lot harder, Dean rarely reveled in details or thought things through, that was always Sam's job. "I don't know, Sammy," he sighed heavily, finishing off his beer before rubbing a hand over his face. "I guess I haven't really thought about it. Living life through my penis," he grinned, breaking the tension a little, making Sam smile. "Some of those things could be a positive. I haven't felt this way about a woman since...her," he still couldn't bring himself to say her name. "Knowing she'd always be here, that I'd never have to do to her what I had to with them, that's really appealing. And I can't help the way I feel about her, when she went to Ezreil I don't think I've ever been so scared in my whole life, Sam. Imagining losing her makes me sick, literally sick! Even knowing that I'll always be competing with any guy in a room for her, she's worth it. She is. I want the whole world with her, whatever that world turns out to be. It scares me that I feel so strongly."

Sam grinned at his brother fondly, reaching over to clap him on the shoulder. "Sounds like a lovesick puppy to me, are you sure she didn't glamour you?" he teased, making Dean scowl and shrug his hand away. "Look, if that's how you feel, then good. You deserve happiness, wherever it may come from. Can't say I'm not a little jealous that she didn't choose me, but I think even that first night I knew that she wasn't meant for me. She was meant for you."

Dean pulled a face at his younger brother, a belly laugh forming at the words. "Who's the sap here Sammy?" He stood, grinning at his brother as he went to grab another beer from the fridge. "Thanks brother. You're right, like usual."

"Grab me one too," Sam finished off his own and kicked back, propping his feet on the coffee table and turning his attention to the John Wayne shoot-em-up starting to play again. Dean rejoined him and the brother's watched in comfortable silence.

Lisa and Ben.

The names echoed through Emily's head as she soaked in the bath, trying hard to concentrate on her book. She hadn't meant to eavesdrop on the boys, she'd gone to grab a water for her bath when she'd heard them talking and paused for a second to take it in. Hearing Sam talk about her had been tough, and unfair. Then he'd mentioned Lisa and Ben and she saw how tense Dean immediately got, with no explanation of who they were and she only listened for a moment more as Dean agreed before she had quietly left and gone back to her bath. So Dean didn't want her after all, just sex to him, not like with whoever this Lisa person was, and Ben? She couldn't fathom who Ben was, or what he was. Another lover? Or a son? Dean's son? He'd never, ever brought them up to Emily before, neither had Sam. But it was clear that they were important to him, and maybe, maybe they were the reason he didn't want her. Tears filled her eyes as Sam's harsh words replayed, "you'll never have that life with Emily." And then Dean had agreed with him.

So he didn't want that. Stuck with her, they'd said. Stuck. She was not there out of free will, she was not there out of the boys love for her. She was there out of obligation. They were obligated. Tears filled Emily's eyes as she set aside the book and sank a little lower into the bath, washing them away with the warm water. Emily wasn't going to be anyone's obligation if she could help it. She had thought that she had something with Dean, she had thought she was even in love with him, but it was clear that he was not with her. No, somewhere, somehow, he had someone else. Lisa and Ben. His family. Emily sat in the bath until the water was cold and her body was wrinkled, then she slowly brought herself out, wrapped herself in a towel, and went to bed, not bothering to change or dry herself off. When Dean came in later, clearly wanting her, she had pretended to be asleep keeping her eyes slammed shut tightly until he left, the disappointment trailing after him.

She didn't know what she was going to do, she didn't know where she was going to go, but one thing was clear, it would not be with the Winchester's. Letting darkness overtake her, Emily slept until morning, the sadness and anger never leaving her heart.