Hi hello this is short and sweet, but i think it's cute. lol To be honest, my brain is just chaotic at the moment and writing this really soothed me. I hope i get over whatever slump my brain is in right now because i miss my babies (by babies i mean all the towen thoughts in my brain that turn into Fics). I hope you're all still here enjoying these fics and i hope you're still lovin on Towen. And I will be back, i promise. And please stay safe! Wear a mask! Vote! i love you. thank you!

Also anyone else listen to Tom Odell? He's so soothing. lol

Constellations - Tom Odell

He breathes her in. The smell of her shampoo is intoxicating. The smell of her is intoxicating. The warmth of her skin against his. His tiredness is settling in. He feels his body relax against hers. He takes note of her shallow breathing. He could feel her think. He could feel her analyze everything.

He gets it. But right now he doesn't want to think. He wants one day to just not think. He wants one day to cherish her. To absorb everything he has been missing for years.

He doesn't want to sleep. He doesn't want to miss a second with her. He glances down at her and leaves a small kiss. She stares out watching the snow fall, she bites her lip. He knows it's something she does when she's anxious or nervous.

He's in Germany. He flew to Germany.

It makes sense to him to be there. Seeing her. Seeing her smile when she opens the door. All he wants is to scoop her up and never let go.

His hands run down her arms. He feels her little goosebumps. He pulls the blanket around them. The glass window fogs from their warmth and Teddy draws a little heart. He can't help but smile.

The comfortable silence fills her apartment. Just a hours ago, it was filled with moans and then laughter and music. He felt at peace hearing her voice. There's a feeling of safety, of calmness to hear her speak, to hear her stories. There is a feeling of belongingness with the way she listens when he speaks. He takes notes of the way she smiles, the way her eyes light up, the way she reacts to everything he says. He feels loved and he feels wanted and he feels cared for.

Since he arrived, he felt that everything was just about the two of them. There was no one else in this world. Just him and her. In snowy Germany. He did not think about anyone else. He felt that he really in the moment. He doesn't want to let go. He did not want to think about what's going to happen tomorrow or the next day or the next week. He doesn't want this day to end.

"This, right here, when it snows…this is the one time I really love this place"

She says interrupting his thoughts. He feels his heartbeat going faster, waiting for the other shoe to drop. He knows she's going to say what she thinks, and knowing her it's always reasonable and realistic. It's not a terrible trait, but it pulls him out of this fantasy he's created for himself.

He stares at the snow falling and he listens to her soft voice. She deserves all the grand gestures. He doesn't even know why he made it snow in the desert. He knew it made her happy, but why was he trying so hard to make her happy.

They spent countless of hours together, in Iraq, laying on the ground, staring at the stars, talking. He spent countless of hours listening to her tell stories about her past, about her feelings, about people she's been with. He would offer some wisdom, some advice, and she would turn her head towards him and give him a smile. She'd roll over and give him a hug. He remembers how giddy he felt. How it felt like nothing else. How stupid was he to not realize then what that feeling was.

The stars in the sky are different tonight. Sure, they can't see it right now, but it feels different.

Tonight he holds her with no guilt. No pretense. It is just what it is. Two best friends finding their way to each other. There is so much love and affection that had always been there. That had always been suppressed. But now everything is different. Everything makes sense.

Not to be corny or anything, but he realizes this is what it feels like to accept your soulmate. The love of your life.

This grand gesture though? Flying to Germany? This made total sense. He's a complete idiot for waiting this long. But this doesn't feel grand. This feels right. This feels necessary. This feels like there had to be a purpose. He knows deep in his gut that this is fruitful. The two of them have gone through a lot. And he knows they will go through more, but he knows at least now they have each other. And they will do whatever it is together. Things are easier when she's by his side.

He feels her squirm out of his embrace. He gets nervous because reality is hitting her, and she's coming down from the high, and he's not quite ready yet.

"This isn't real"

He shakes his head because why can't it be? He's here. They're here. And they're really holding each other. And they really made love. And it felt good. God. It felt good and he'd do it again and again and he knows she'd want to do it again and again and again.

He doesn't know where this is going. Not yet. But he will figure it out. They will figure it out. They will take it a day at a time. They don't need to have a plan now. They can do that tomorrow.

He's in this. He wants this. He wants to be a part of her world. A part of her life.

He wants to meet her friends. He wants to see the hospital. The refugee clinic. He wants a tour around Landstuhl. He wants to walk around and hold her hand. He wants to try the roasted chicken place. He wants to be with his best friend. He wants to build a life with her.

This doesn't terrify him because this is familiar. Because the only thing that's standing between them is the six thousand miles of land and water. Because this how he's supposed to be feeling this entire time. And it took him many decades and two wives to realize that it was his best friend all along.

"I AM in love with you, Teddy" He says, and he means it. He means every single word. He loves her. He is IN love with her. And there is no doubt in his mind. "I realized I loved you and how I've loved you"

He kicks himself for realizing this late but he got there eventually. If he could re-d everything, he would. He would have picked her from the beginning. He doesn't know what stopped him before. But there's no stopping now. He wants her to believe every single word he's saying because he means every word. He loves her. He is in love with her. And it's not just sex, it's not just thrill, it's everything.

He holds her. The feeling of her under his touch. It's like a high he doesn't ever want to come down from.

"Teddy, we'll figure this out. I don't want this to end."

"Me neither"

"All the logistics? They'll fall into place. I just know that I want to be with you. I want to figure this out together."

"We will."

He runs his hand down her arm and he kisses the top of her head.

She looks up at him and reaches for his lips. He leans down to kiss her because that's all he wants to do from then on. He kisses her, and he really kisses her. He kisses her like their time is limited. She shifts and wraps her arms around him. Her head against his chest. He smiles when he gives her a squeeze.

"I love you, Owen" she says softly. And he melts.

He relaxes again. And breath evens out.

"Lets move to the bed. Get some sleep" He whispers.

She untangles from him and takes his hand. She pulls him in for a kiss and wraps her arms around his neck. He takes the opportunity to pull her by the waist. He pulls her close to him and lifts her gently. She wraps her long legs around his waist and he carries her to the bed. Gently placing her down. Hovering over her. Taking in her beauty. He stares deeply at her eyes and he gives her a smile.

"I love you" He says.

She smiles and pulls him in.

He knows she's tired. Physically. He is too. But they're making the most out of this. Because reality will hit. Reality is him having to back to Seattle for now. Until they figure out what to do. So screw sleep. He'll just make love to her over and over and over.

And he makes love to her and cherishes every thrust, every feeling, every kiss. Making up for all the time he's hurt her, or given her false hope, or had taken her for granted.

Right now she is the most important person in his life. He wants this. He's sure of it. He doesn't want this to end. He doesn't want to fuck it up.

So when he comes in her, and when she clenches around him, all logic and rational thought is out the window. He takes it all in. He knows she's doing the same thing. He leans down to kiss her and collapses on top of her. Exhausted. Elated. Ecstatic.

He doesn't know what's coming. He doesn't know what's going to happen in a few hours. In a few days. In a few weeks. He doesn't realize the ways this could change his life forever. But at this moment, he has everything he needs.

thoughts!? Thank you! love you! xo