A/N ok so i know i said that this is where she tells the team, and it was going to be but then it would have made it too long so with my hand on my heart the next chapter will have it.

AJ x

When afternoon came Peter gathered all the old Cliffhangers and the BAU round the by the wood shed.

"Shel's been gone hours now. I think we should split into teams and try and find her."

"I found her" Kat said from opposite Peter. Everyone looked to the tree line and saw JJ walking out towards the cabin. JJ felt eyes burning into her back and turned to see that 14 sets of eyes staring at her. Some of them looked upset, some scared but most of them looked at JJ with pity and sympathy which was one of the reasons JJ left in the first place. She shook her head and continued to the cabin.

"Do you mind if Soph and I go?" Peter turned and asked Hotch "We would like a word with her."

"Be my guest, I'm not sure we would know what to say anyway. The incident this morning…that wasn't the JJ we know"

"But it was the Shelby we know." Daisy stated.

"Thanks." Peter grabbed Sophie's hand ignoring Daisies comment and they walked together towards the cabin JJ had walked into.

They didn't bother knocking. They just went in and saw JJ sitting on her old bed with her head in her hands.

"Shelby…" Sophie took a seat next to the warn out blonde.

"Don't Sophie" JJ looked up at them "I promised my self when I became JJ that I would never do something like that ever again. This morning I became Shelby. I acted the way she used to act. I could feel the anger and hate running threw me. She took over and I couldn't stop her."

"You have to stop thinking that Shelby and JJ are different people. Their not, their both you. If you keep doing this you will loose the people out there that care for you and you'll eventually end up killing yourself." Peter sat the other side of her.

"What is this? Your form of shock therapy. I though that was my department" JJ let out a cold laugh but quickly stopped when she realized that it was Shelby talking and not JJ "I'm sorry, I…"

"You need to stop apologizing." Sophie put her arm round JJ's small shoulders "We don't know who you are anymore Shel, not really. The only people that can help you now are your team." JJ looked up at her hurt "That doesn't mean were not going to try, it just means they can help you more than we can."

"Once you tell them the truth about why you're here and what happened, you will see that they will still love you and nothing will change. They will be there for you just like we all were and still are." Peter Joined Sophie hugging JJ.

"Not everyone was there." JJ whispered.

"Scott came round though didn't he? After he thought he lost you on you're solo's he didn't care what you used to be or what happened to you. He loved you for who you were scars and all."

They stayed like that listening to the world go round outside and remembering what things used to be like back in the day.

"So are you going to tell them?" Peter asked moving down in front of JJ.

She nodded "Will you stay with me while I do?" JJ hated sounding so weak and damaged but she couldn't tell her new family alone she needed help from some of her old family.

"Of course we'll stay." Sophie hugged her tighter.

"We'll stay for as long as you need us." Peter hugged his wife and the woman he loved like his own daughter.

"Let me take a shower and then we can do this." JJ pulled away from the hug.

"Ok I'll wait here and Peter can gather them in his office, if that's ok with you?" JJ nodded her head and gathered her things heading for the shower room for the second time that day.

The smile she gave them never reached her eyes

"Am I doing the right thing?" JJ asked stopping outside Peter's office.

"C'mon Shel, we talked about this. What ever happens Peter and I will be right there." Sophie held JJ's hand.

"Why could I never have a 'normal' person's life?" JJ sighed looking at the door knowing the next time she walked of the room, they would know everything about who she really was.

"Because it wasn't the hand you were dealt." Sophie winked at JJ and grabbed hold of the door handle "You ready?"

JJ took a deep breath steadying her nerves and shaking hands "I think so."

The door opened revealing Peter sitting at his desk, Emily, Garcia, Reid and Rossi sitting on the couch and Morgan and Hotch sitting on the chairs. JJ avoided eye contact with all of them except for Peter who gave her an encouraging wink. JJ sat down on the last free seat where she was able to see everyone. She could feel their eyes burning into her again. The day she had told Peter everything was one of the scariest things she had to do because it was like admitting it was real, that it had all happened and she couldn't hide from it anymore as Shelby, and now as JJ she was about to do it all over again. All she wanted to do was run and hide from it all again.

"Peter, I…" She turned to look at the man sitting at the desk.

Before she could finish he got up from his desk and knelt down in front of her, holding her hands "You can do this. You need to stop hiding from who you are. You can run and change your name but it will never change what happened and if it didn't happen you wouldn't be who you are today."

"The person I am today's not that great, She's a coward, she's weak, she's dirty and broken…" JJ didn't bother hiding her words from her family, they were going to feel the same way about her soon enough.

"No she's not. You are amazing Shel. Everything you've been threw, most people would have given up a long time ago but you didn't, you fought to keep your sanity, your life and you've done it. You have a brilliant job where you save peoples lives and you have a family that obviously love you. It took Soph and I months to break down those concrete walls you had and we still didn't get rid of all of them, please don't build more. Their not going to think of you any differently than we do. Please open up to them." Peter wiped the tear that had fallen down JJ's face with his thumb. She nodded and let out the breath she had been holding. Peter kissed her forehead and sat on the arm of her chair so she could feel a little bit safer.

None of the team had ever seen JJ so scared. Their strong, confident media liaison looked beyond broken; she looked like she was completely shattered. Her once bright blue eyes were dark, life less and sunken, her bright lips were pail with a slight hint of blue and her face was whiter than a blanket of snow. In other words Jennifer Jareau looked a mess. You didn't need to be a profiler to see that whatever had happened to JJ growing up was horrific.

Even with what Peter had said JJ was still struggling to open up. Hotch decided he was going to give her a little encouragement and hope.

"JJ" For the first time since walking into the room she made eye contact with Hotch "I want you to know that what ever it is that you're scared to tell us, it will be ok, were not going to abandon you, your one of us, one of the family and nothing will ever change that."

"You accepted my biggest secret baby girl." Morgan hated seeing JJ look so alone, she needed to know how he felt "I didn't tell any of you because I thought you would blame me, push me away for what happened but you didn't, none of you did. You were there for me Jayje, that first night back, you knocked on my door and we just sat and watched movies for hours. Please baby I hate seeing you like this, I love you like a sister. We just want to help you." Morgan wiped the tear from his cheek before anyone but JJ noticed it was there.

"Morgan…I'm…I'm really sorry about this morning, I…" JJ didn't know how she could apologies because 'I'm sorry' just didn't seem enough.

"Forget about it Baby girl, I already have."

"Thankyou." JJ mouthed to him as the smile she gave still didn't reach her eyes.

JJ looked at them all. She could see the pleading in their eyes and the sadness. Last she locked eyes with Emily and Garcia and out of know where she found courage and strength from her best friends glances.

"I don't know where to begin." JJ said with a shake still in her voice.

"The beginning normally is a good place Kitten." If it was possible more colour drained from JJ's face at Garcia's nickname and her eyes closed tight with fear. You could hear the gasp come from Sophie and the small grown come from Peter, The team looked at each other wondering what was wrong with what Garcia had said.

"Please" JJ managed to push away the vomit feeling that rose inside her "Don't call me that."

"Jayje, I'm sorry, I didn't…" Garcia knew from The three adults reaction that the nickname she used was a bad choice of words.

"It's ok" JJ opened her eyes and could see the hurt in Garcia's "You'll understand soon, just please don't call me that anymore." JJ didn't sound angry or annoyed she sounded scared.

"Ok I won't." Emily's hand rested on top of Garcia's "How about Gumdrop is that ok?"

"All the others are good just not that one." JJ could see the hurt lift from her best friends eyes.

They sat in silence waiting for JJ to start. When she didn't Peter rested a hand on her shoulder "The beginning Shel, It's always the best."

"The beginning…ok" JJ took a deep breath preparing herself for what she was about to do….

A/N NEXT will be Wendesday or tomorrow night.

i am still getting alot of people reading it but not as many reviews as i would like so please review and make a girl extra happy!

AJ x