Today was the day.
The day of Kris's second job as the Hero, and right now he and his group were inside one of the Guard Stations where they were being fully instructed on what the Job entailed and how they were going to do their raid on Astron's home.
"The divination info we got says that Astron is currently home and in his office at this very moment along with a few of his men," The Lieutenant said as he pointed at the schematics for the guy's manion which was one of the oldest places in the Western Noble District, apparently his Grandfather Astron Bullivile the First, had bought it about a hundred years ago. And yes that meant that this Astron was Astron Bullivile the Third. "Lord Hero, his office is located on the first floor, through this hallway."
"Any defenses to be worried about other than the 'help'?"
"There shouldn't be, for it was made before trapping houses became popular," The Lieutenant answered.
"Good." Kris said, making a mental note for Ziro to still give a cursory check to be safe. "Do we have any info on the 'help' itself?"
"Just the generic help you can buy with enough coin, no one special, just disgraced soldiers," The Knight responded.
"Alright then." Kris said with a nod. "Would it pay to make a 'formal visit', as the Hero to have them let us in with some flattery of meeting him?"
"No."
"Too smart?"
"Paranoid." The Lieutenant said. "And he would take that as a hostile action against him, for he would assumely think why the hero would interact with a 'lowly merchant' such as himself."
Kris snapped. "Damn, if I'd of thought of it sooner I would have been making visits to others to set that up…but I always do better with a straight-forward approach. When do we leave?"
"Now."
—
Lieutenant was right in saying that the mansion that Astron lived in was old as Kris could see the clear difference between it and the others as it looked to be made out of the same brick and stone work that made up the city's walls, compared to the marble look of the others.
Which also meant that breaking through said walls would be harder… but the door seemed to be a merely heavy oak with a large and obvious lock on it.
"Ziro, do your thing."
"On it my Lady," Ziro replied as he took out a set of lock picks from his belt and got to work. And not even half a minute later Kris heard an audible click from the door and Ziro pushed it open slowly to reveal a rather… dilapidated hall. Like this place had not been well kept.
Which kinda made sense as there had been no mention of any actual help in the manion.
But the tracks through the dust proved it was just a business area to the man and not a home.
"Okay, we're heading in." Kris said, leading the way with Hilda by his side, weapons out cautiously as they headed up the stairs towards the office, the squishier two right behind, also ready.
As they approached, he could hear the slightly rustling of moving clothes and of metal in movement.
They definitely knew they were there.
Well, no point in being stealthy then.
With that, he kicked the door open, slamming it into the wall with a bang.
Revealing on the other side of the hall, and revealing the hallway that to the office and in were four individuals, two dressed in wizard robes, one dressed in armor and decked out in weapons, and another who looked like stereotypical monk.
"Welp, I'm going face." Kris said before dead-on sprinting towards them, running clear across the hallway to them in a rush of speed.
"So who the fuck are you to intrude!" The guy dressed in armor shouted.
"I'm the Hero." Kris said. "This is my party. You can surrender now, or at any time… but I can't guarantee you'll survive if you don't surrender right. Now."
"As if," The guy in Monk Robes said and which was responded to by the sound of a bullet being fired. And the man moved relatively quick and Kris watched as the man tried to deflect the shot with his hand, but it only managed to make it pass through it instead of his body. "Arghh, my hand!" He screamed at the hole that was now through it.
"Hey! Your girlfriend has a new hole," Lily mocked him. Which caused the monk to growl, but before he could respond Kris heard Hilda let out a hiya!
As her spear came flying and impaled the guy in his foot.
"Like I said, you can surrender." Kris said. "Or, most likely, die painfully."
No reaction beyond fear- not of him, but of something else.
Kris shrugged. "Die painfully it is then." So saying, he bashed the monk-like one's head in with his flowery weapon, the injured man still able to barely dodge one of his swings.
"Hold still," One of the hooded men said and Kris felt his entire body look up.
"Not so tough now are you?" The monk said as he pulled out the spear and threw hands at Kris.
And proceeded to hurt his hand by doing so.
"Yes, yes I am that tough, bitch." Kris thought angrily at the fucking idiot.
"He is the toughest around you idiots." Lily shouted.
"Shut up bitch," The guy dressed in armor said he drew his longsword and shortsword and slashed at Kris.
And while the blades drew blood, they still didn't do much.
"Wounds shall bleed forever," The other mage chanted and the guy's hand was sheathed in green necrotic energy as it slashed out against Kris.
And it did nothing.
The magical claws did not pierce his skin.
The guy looked at his hand in confusion so sure that it would hurt Kris, but he didn't get a chance to respond as Kris saw his entire head blow up into pieces as the actual sound of the gun that had been fired rang out a microsecond later.
"Oh shit John!" The other mage guy shouted and suddenly his friend's bodies began to shine with light.
Lilly's laughter rang through the air.
"That is what foul thugs as you deserve!" Hilda as she rushed up and brandished her blade against the monk.
And she viciously cut into his body.
And as she did, Kris grit his teeth, mentally flipped the bird to the magic, and began to move once more, catching his breath as he did.
"No you don't!"
"Yes I do!" Kris growled as he shook it off before it could stick the second time.
"Frank, can't you do anything right!" The Monk guy shouted.
"I am sorry Francis, but this guy is strong!" The Mage? Cleric? Responded.
"Just let me and Franky handle it!" The monk shouted as he started punching Hilda seemingly figuring that the armor clad angel was less tough than Kris.
And only the punch directly to her face seemed to do anything but she tanked it like a champ.
"Fuck you, you fuck heads do you know who you are messing with?" Franky shouted as he swung his swords at Kris.
Kris casually blocked each with his shield. "Do you?"
"Shit!"
Another shot rang out and then the monk got a bullet in his head.
"Shit!"
"Target down my Lady," Came Ziro's voice from behind.
"Nice shot, as expected."
"Unlike you guys, you had Krissy in Hold Person and you still couldn't hurt him!" Lily mocked them.
"And I shall make sure that does not occur again," Hilda said as she however over the ground and body to attack the Cleric in the back.
Whom she viciously stabbed twice in rapid succession.
"Giving you guys one last chance to surrender before you get brutally destroyed." Kris threatened/offered.
"I know what awaits us," Franky said. "Rather die in combat than the gallows."
"Then perish." Kris said, swinging the flowered staff with murderous intent, cracking his armor with a satisfying crunch, the merc still standing, though unable to defend against the follow-up blow to the head.
"I shall."
"And I shall take you with us!" The fanatic shouted as he reached into his cloak and pulled out a row of beads and threw them at the ground.
"HILDA!" Kris cried out, as he tried to shield her-
BWOOOM!
Everything was engulfed in flame as Kris's world burned, the most pain he'd felt in this world as he screamed in agony.
But it only lasted for a second or two, before the fire faded.
Kris was still standing, burned but not broken, his clothes perfectly fine (thank you, adamantine reinforcement!), and Hilda-
"Hilda, are you alright?" Kris asked worriedly as he looked at his friend.
"I…I am alright actually." Hilda said with surprise as she was completely untouched by the fire, not even soot on her armor, and then actually looked at Kris. "Kris!"
"Krissy!"
"My Lady!"
"What, is something wrong?" Kris asked.
"You are more well done than the first steak I made!" Lily shouted.
"Well, those are two problems with the same solution." Kris said with a touch of snark. "Cure the meat."
"Oh right," Both Lily and Hilda said as the two of them got to healing Kris.
"Thank you." Kris said, significantly less crispy. "Alright, let's just check if the other one had one of those…" Kris said as he went to the charred skeletons and, as expected, the other former caster had a similar necklace that he put in his bag for now. "Don't want that being used against us…"
"Okay that was definitely something, lets go and arrest that Astron guy," Lily said.
"Yes, but… let's be careful, alright? Those guys were way too willing to die for this to be a simple thing." Kris said, looking at the skeletons. "And the magic items… just let's be careful."
With that, they headed for the door to the office, weapons ready, as they opened the door and entered the surprisingly massive and well-kept office.
And sitting behind a large mahogany desk sat the guy they were after.
Astron Bullivile the Third.
He was a human dressed in a rather modern looking business suit, his black hair slicked back, and his piercing green eyes looking directly at them as he did the Gendo Pose. Around his wrists were some kind of metal bands with something written on it, clearly magic in nature.
And behind him was a… truly massive, vicious-looking ax mounted on the wall.
"Well how can I help my rude guests of honor?" The man spoke with a gravelly voice like he smoked twenty packs a day.
"Hey, we knocked, your guards were the ones that blew themselves up." Kris pointed out. "And you could us by, you know, coming peacefully. Cooperating."
"Hehehe, so I can only assume that with you being here Mr. Hero, that that fool Titus managed to discover my little side business?"
"Something like that." Kris said as they cautiously approached, waiting on any surprises.
"Well I guess that means I have to move business to another city," Astron said with a sigh as he stood up.
"Like hell you will!" Kris said as he reached into his bag.
"Hehe you think you're going to leave here alive?"
"Do you?" Kris before throwing one of the beads at the man like a fastball.
And it exploded in a ball of fire.
"Yes!" Came the deep voice and out from the fire came a large, male, minotaur.
"Wait, I thought all the humanoid-type ones were all mamono?" Kris asked in confusion.
"I am one of the few left, I cut myself of from that system a hundred years ago, while my former comrades became cock hungry sluts, I did not not, I loved it. The murder, the carnage, the rape, I reveled in it, unlike those cowards I called brothers!" Astron the Minotaur roared as he took the Greataxe from the wall.
"Okay guys, let's do this." Kris said as he held up his shield.
And at that Ziro fired his gun and the bullet hit Astron's shoulder and it barely seemed to bother the minotaur.
"You have to do better than that," Astron growled.
Kris chose that moment to run up and try chucking his shield at the minotaur, only realizing after he threw that he probably should have practiced doing so with the differently weighted shield before combat as it went wide.
"Hahaha!" Astron laughed before the chair Kris had thrown collided with his face. "...I am going to enjoy making you into my bitch."
"Now make my Hero, grow!" Lily chanted.
Kris grinned as the surge of arcane might moved through him and he doubled in size, now standing eye-to-eye with Astron.
"Let's go!" Astron shouted as he charged at Kris.
Kris tried to catch the charge, and while he stood his ground, the horns still stabbed into his chest as he grunted in pain.
"Do not touch him!" Hilda shouted and Kris saw a now shining spear hit Astron's side, which was followed up by another gunshot from Ziro who Kris could see was now a bit behind the minotaur.
"Thanks Hilda!" Kris said before hitting Astron in the face with his shield and sweeping his leg out from under him at the same time, knocking him to the ground where Kris held him there with a foot to his chest.
"Get off me!" Astron shouted.
"No! And let's get him guys!"
"There is a reason they changed to stop being an asshole like you!" Lily shouted at him, which Astron responded to by letting out a scream of pain and anguish as Kris saw the caterpillars in his eye explode, blood sprung from them, his mouth and also ears.
"You, I kill you!" Astron roared as he tried to get up but Kris kept him down.
"As if," Hilda and Kris said at the same time. As she came up here body transformed, a transformation Scot had only seen once that being the first time they met.
Her formerly blue armor was now white and the gold was a radiant orange, her wings the same color along with her hair, the color of dawn.
"You shall face divine judgment now for your crimes." Hilda spoke as she swung her blade and she cut with divine power into Astron's body dealing deep wounds that burnt his body.
"But we aren't the executioners." Kris said before bashing his shield into Astron's face once, twice, and he was out.
"Alright, with that done." Kris said, hefting the unconscious minotaur over his shoulder like a sack of potatoes, grabbing the ax as well. "Ziro, loot anything valuable. Give information to the Order, keep anything else for us."
"Yes my Lady." Ziro replied.
So saying, Kris walked out of the building victoriously, the others following proudly as he stepped out, the minotaur over his shoulder. "Hey, we got Astron." Kris said, his already loud voice carrying even better with the increased lung capacity.
"By the Chief God!"
"Is that a?"
"I didn't think those existed anymore!"
"That's Astron?"
"Quick get the chains, the heavy chains!"
Those were the responses from the Guards and Order knights as they saw Kris exit the mansion not even ten minutes after he had entered.
"The Hero is truly something."
"Yes praise be the Hero."
And after that came the praise from them as Astron was taken into custody.
Normally, Kris would deny compliments and praise, try to downplay his achievements.
But after that, after getting explodinated in particular?
He basked in it.
"Please, I was just doing my job." Kris said.
"Wow, so humble."
"So mighty."
"So sexy."
Which was when he shrunk, whether from Lily dropping it or the duration ending he wasn't sure. But he did note the ax shrunk with him for some reason.
"Truly though, the one who did the most damage to Astron was probably Hilda." Kris said.
"Only probably thanks to you, Lord Hero."
They began and Kris started to realize while the Angels were revered by the people, the one who was titled Hero…
Was higher on the totem pole.
—
After that they had all delivered their report to Head-Captain Titus, with Ziro giving over all the documents they had found, but most of it was just business ledgers for both sides of the law, with the only thing truly of note he had found had been a letter from someone called Father Blood, who was the one who had provided the two Clerics to Astron.
Of what 'blashphemous' god they followed there was no mention of.
Kris was certain he'd be hearing more about that later.
But for now?
Once they'd gotten through all the proceedings, Kris was pretty sure the time was, at last, now.
And so, they were on the roof of the Tavern, all the requisite materials in his bag, and the 'target' on his back.
"So what trick you gonna show us, Krissy?" Lily asked.
"Well, it won't be particularly visible," Kris admitted as he took the ax off his back and set it on the ground and began to draw out the circle in chalk. "But I wanted everyone around to watch when I cast my first spell."
"You understand what was in that book?" Lily asked.
"Yeah." Kris said. "I am a learn-ed scholar, thank you."
"Cool, so what is this one going to be?" Lily asked.
"I believe Identify, is that correct my Lady?" Ziro asked.
"Right on the money Ziro." Kris agreed. "Though my version is a bit slow to cast, it should work just as well as the normal one."
"I believe that is called Ritual Casting right? The Oldest Form of Magic," Hilda asked.
"From my understanding, yes, this is a ritual." Kris said. "It's the most I can do until I figure out how to use my own arcane potential."
"Well I hope you have talent, magic is cool," Lily said.
"It really is."
And so, he focused.
And about 10 minutes later, the circle flashed before being sucked up into the pearl pressed against his forehead as a surge of information flowed into his brain.
"So did it work?" Lily asked.
"Of course it did," Ziro responded.
Kris's eyes focused back onto the world around him. "It's an ax with an enchantment that, if you hit things hard enough with it, it'll deal more damage than it normally would be able to."
"Oh that is good for you Kris," Hilda said. "You can hit very hard."
"Yeah… but this ax is a bit too big to use with one hand… hmm. Offense or defense… mode swap, I like it." Kris said with a shrug as he put it on his back, where it… magnetically stuck to his back, which it had also done earlier. It was pretty neat. "I have another spell I can cast too, but I think that one's best done on my own."
"Okay if that is what you want to do," Lily said. "So in the meantime, what do we do now?"
"...Eat, drink, and be merry?" Kris suggested.
"Yeah we can do that," Hilda said and to further confirm that choice all their stomachs rumbled demanding food.
"Then we celebrate a job well done!" Kris declared.