Once upon a time, Severus Snape was certain Hogwarts was in fact hell on earth. He was more than sure being stuck in a classroom day in and day out surrounded by angry, depressed and broody teenagers was obviously his hell-loop and he wondered what he had done in life that was so crude and so vile he was tortured with such a thing. Oh wait, that's right… The whole Death Eater thing. But surely, he had done enough good in his life to cancel out the bad. Obviously not.

Now. Now he realised he was wrong. So very wrong. He tossed up bitterly one morning wondering if he would rather be in the real hell or be here when the students returned in two days to recommence their studies after the war. So far, the deepest depths of hell were looking incredibly beautiful right now. Honestly, what could they torture him with down there that he wasn't already privy to here? Exactly. Nothing.

He already played the death of Lily Potter over and over in his head day in and day out wondering what he could have done differently to change the outcome. So, if they tried that on him in hell, it wouldn't have much effect which was also the reason he assumed this was hell on earth. His brain never stopped thinking and blaming himself for things outside of his control.

He had gone through every scenario in his head, he had gone through every thought process and always came to the same conclusion and that was if she had chosen him, the friend that stood by her side, the friend that loved her with their whole heart, she would still be alive.
Although then he would second guess that conclusion and wonder if perhaps things would have been different if he hadn't had called her a Mudblood. Would she have ended up with him anyway and not Potter if he had treated her differently? No. He doubted that. Once he was in Slytherin that pretty much started to drive the wedge between their friendship and headed it down the path of no return.

He often wondered if he would ever get over the death of Lily. After all, it was slowly creeping up to two decades since her passing and the wound in his heart was still as fresh and raw as the night it happened. The night he held her lifeless, cooling body in his arms cradling her and willing her back to life. Of course, the love was not reciprocated but he didn't care. He would have loved her unconditionally no matter what.

Leaning over the Daily Prophet as he ate breakfast in his chambers, he inhaled sharply at what he had just read. The toast that was currently occupying his mouth shot to the back of his throat and caused him to choke on it in spectacular style.

Tears pricking his eyes and throat burning after the offending toast had been dislodged, he read the article on the front page to ensure he did in fact read what he thought he had.

Marriage Law- Effective Immediately.

After the devastating war and the insurmountable loss of life within our world, we have come to the conclusion after many hours of deliberation and exhausting all other avenues that our already small populace will not survive without the intensive re-population needed to brings numbers back into surplus.

Therefore, effective immediately a marriage law will come into effect. Details will be sent to those affected by the week's end.

Anyone aged between seventeen (turning 18 within the next year) and fifty years of age that aren't married will be paired with a partner of similar intellect, interests and personality.

A child is to be produced within two years of the marriage and up to two children must be produced over the course of the marriage.

Failure to marry and procreate will see the snapping of your wand, the obliviation of your mind and the abrupt and forced entry into muggle life without recollection of your time within our world.

There is an information morning at the ministry tomorrow morning at ten a.m to answer any of your concerns.

He slammed the paper down on his table, sending the glass of juice flying. Shit. Fuck. That was it, take him back to hell because he as sure as shit wasn't going to enter into the sanctity of marriage no matter who it was with. He was tired and over life and the last thing he wanted was to let a woman into his life and have to raise two crotch nuggets of his own. This was unjust and not right. No, he wouldn't stand for this and neither would anyone else he was certain.

What if he was paired with the likes of Sinistra, Pansy Parkinson or even worse… Hermione Granger.

He could imagine a life with Hermione Granger now may Merlin have mercy on his soul. The constant nagging and nattering. They would lock horns because she often thought she was smarter than anyone else and had no trouble letting that be known. He couldn't stand people like that and he sure as shit couldn't stand Hermione Granger on a good day let alone having to crawl into bed beside her nightly, lay a kiss on her cheek and fulfil his duties to fuck her until she was carrying his child.

Either way, no matter whom he was wed to and who he had to lay beside in their connubial bed, he could promise them one thing. There would be no love, not even an ounce. He could offer civility and little more than that because there was only ever one true love for him and that ship had long sailed, crashed and burned.

o-o-o-o-o

"They cannot do this!" Hermione slammed the paper down on the table at the burrow early the same morning Severus had read the Daily Prophet. Face distorted in pure disgust as she looked as if she were about to vomit all over the table.

She forced herself to take deep, calming breaths but it did nothing as her anger grew the more she processed what was happening. Why the hell should she have to give up her goals in life to push out a few children to some man who would never love her just to fulfil a make-believe duty to the ministry?

She wouldn't stand for it. Not now. Not ever. She would protest, she would send howlers, she would storm down there and chain herself to the front door of the minister's bloody office if need be. She would hang placards, she would drop flyers from the roof, she would… she would…

"Hermione?" Ron clicked his fingers in front of her pulling her from her internal mood souring rant.

"Hmm. What?" She shook her head as if bringing herself mentally back to the room and the conversation at hand. Mind still turning over at a million miles an hour processing what she had read. Fist curled tightly into balls as the pure rage coursed through her body.

"Maybe we will be put together." He beamed, hopefully, but his face fell the instant he saw Hermione's contort into uncertainty just a fraction.

"I mean…Maybe. Hopefully. I am sure they will." She waved a dismissive hand airily and tried to plant a smile on her face, but it only came as a scowl.

"This is ridiculous. What if I end up with Millicent Bulstrode or worse, Pansy Parkinson!" Harry slammed an open palm on the large wooden table angrily eyeing the Daily Prophet with so much anger in his eyes Hermione was certain it might explode into flames.

"What if I end up with Draco Malfoy, or worse, Severus Snape." She eyed the two boys worriedly as a large lump formed in her throat. Oh, dear sweet Merlin no, that couldn't happen. She would rather sink down into the pits of hell than be held against her will in a relationship with either of those.

"Isn't Snape like a hundred anyway?" Ron asked seriously.

Sweet Ronald. Not the brightest bulb in the pack or the sharpest knife in the drawer but he always meant well.

"Ron. He's not even in his forties yet. He is open and fair game as far as I am aware. There is every chance in the world I could end up with him." She began gnawing on a short fingernail with vigour. Surely, they wouldn't do that. Pair a student with a teacher.

"Imagine having to be sodomised by Snape and carry his child," Ron interjected pretending to gag.

"Well. Firstly Ronald, stop trying to use big words you have no idea of the meaning of. If anyone was sodomised, they wouldn't be carrying a child because that is not how the reproductive system works and secondly, I am not being sodomised by anyone."

Utter confusion etched into every line of Ron's face. "I didn't mean you, Mione. I meant anyone in general and isn't sodomise sex?"

"Sodomise is non-procreative sex, Ronald, generally anal sex, hence why anyone who was on the receiving end of it, wouldn't end up pregnant. Honestly, you can't just go around saying things you don't know the meaning of, you will say the wrong this to the wrong person one day."

The article kept spinning around and around in her head. They would be paired with someone of similar intellect. Intellect was first and foremost on the list of qualities and traits they were matching again so, therefore, Ron wouldn't be her match. She could cross her fingers and hold out hope that Harry was matched with her, but she doubted it. Draco was always just reaching out and grasping at her grades in Hogwarts only falling short by the smallest margins to best her, so he was a real possibility.

She wasn't even going to compare herself to Snape because as far as she was concerned, that pairing would never, ever happen.

And what was it with the ministry pairing couples off based on intellect? Were they trying to create a race of purpose-bred witches and wizards and hiding it under the guise of repopulation? Was this the perfect time for them to try a sneaky little science experiment without suspicion or repercussion?

"Anyway." She pushed an errant curl behind her ear with force and standing up sending her chair flying a few feet across the room, "I am going to the ministry tomorrow to hear what they have to say. I hope they know none of us will stand for this act they are trying to pull, and I hope you two will be coming with me. Now, if you excuse me, I am off to pack for Hogwarts. I still can't believe you two are making me go back alone," she harrumphed. Folding her arms tightly across her chest now even sourer than when she first read the article she stormed off up the stairs.

Imagine if she did get Severus Snape. She screwed her face up as she pushed into the bedroom, she had been residing in. Imagine having to crawl into bed beside him and having to fulfil your marital duties. She shuddered just a touch.

A/N: I know! It's been aggggggessss since I updated this story and I am sorry! Please accept this little filler as a peace offering.

-Aliasmel1