Madison
Tech room was dimly lit by screens showing most of western chapterhouse's surroundings in night vision. The radar was fully operational and we depended on it and remaining cameras to warn us about eventual enemies approaching. We came here shortly after Garret gathered us to tell us about going to England after we've fulfilled one last mission. The details of the mission were to be shared with us later. Probably when our leaders reached some form of agreement about whatever needed to be done. Dad was used to having the last word always on top of hierarchy in his little unit, Garret was unyielding and confident in his leader role... I sighed relieved, that I didn't need to be a part of this... dialogue.
We spoke little, both mum and Josh seemed engrossed in their private thoughts and Peter wasn't a talker. We ate a supper of dry rations and my mom and Peter stretched their bedrolls in opposite corners of the room, leaving me and Josh on the first watch. It was strange. Even though making sure at least one soldier was up at all times made perfect sense, I could just have slept with the others and someone else, could keep watch.
After years of pining for Josh being just as good as alone with him in a room should have been a dream come true. Yet I was reluctant to seek him out.
First hour or so we didn't say anything. I was tweaking sensitivity and priorities for the security system, mostly for the hell of it, as Peter was electronic master of the two of us. Then the room filled with my mom's sighing breathing and Peter's snoring.
"Isn't there a way to make it alarm you if anything gets detected?" Josh surprised me with sudden question.
"Yes, it should send me notification to my phone, but I don't know how much I trust it. Garret's... Commander Sebastian's phone was hijacked by Talon, we couldn't call him and he couldn't call us..." I started a long monologue, that I often fell into when soldiers confronted me about something related to technology. I felt that on one hand they doubted my ability, because I was just a girl on the other hand I suspected they didn't understand much about it themselves. So I ventured on impossible mission to explain basics to them and at the same time impress them with how knowledgeable I was. I mostly failed both.
"Well turn it on and let's get out of here. I could use some fresh air." He said.
For a moment I considered waking up my mom and Peter. The battle has shown me what my mother tried to shield me from all this time. The gravity of this war. Sneaking off when on watch was something I would have done without thinking. Yesterday.
Josh must have seen my hesitation because he added. "I know what I'm doing Madison, it will be all right."
Yesterday it would have been more than enough. If something went wrong I'd just say it was Josh responsibility. Today I knew that if something went wrong there might just as well be no one to blame and no one to forgive.
"Come on Madison, I want to talk to you about something. Please." Josh was asking to talk with me. I felt some of myself waking up from freeze reaction to the battle.
"Okay. Gimmie a sec." I relented and checked if all the procedures were operational after my tweaking. It took good half an hour before I felt that leaving the room with a remote alarm, that was offline and only connected to our security system through infrared was kinda okay.
"Let's go." I said to Josh and followed him out of the room. I felt a stab of guilt passing my mom, but shoved it down. I wanted to fool around on the roof with Josh do much. Even more than before.
We crawled up the stairs, Stealth have taken all the clone corpses away, but the stench of blood and spilled guts still lingered here. Josh led me to a room beside the landing, then he's shouldered his M4 and through a hole in the wall he crawled up to the roof. He then reached down his hand to help me up. First I just stood there taking in the dark sky full of stars, breathing in crisp night air savoring the touch of wind on my face and hair, feeling alive.
Josh pointed to the front of the building and we went to stand close to the edge, I looked at our base. In the weak light of stars and waning moon the damage didn't look as serious, everything reminded me of some post apocalyptic piece of art.
Josh stood beside me looking at me and I enjoyed it for a while. It used to be the other way around most of the time, me looking at him and him looking away. Something deep inside of me told me, that as soon as I look up, the spell will be broken. But was this really that bad? Too hard to handle? Have he brought me up here to hurt me? I looked up at him, at his handsome face. "What did you want to tell me?" I asked.
He looked into my eyes and furrowed with an expression I couldn't decipher, but that made him look even more handsome. "Mostly just goodbye." He said.
"What?" I asked surprised and scared.
"I'm leaving the Order of St George Madison. I'll ask Commander Sebastian's permission first thing tomorrow." He answered in a rushed way that made me think, that it wasn't all.
"Why?" I asked unsure if I was sad or just surprised.
"There's no room for me here. I... When this clones got me... I thought I was going to die. And I was so full of regret for living all my life in the Order, pretending to be someone I am not. And then this other dragon rescued me... Not only that but miraculously healed my wounds. It was as she's given me a new life. And I cannot waste it." This was more than he has ever said to me, at least since I was fifteen. But I couldn't say that I have understood much of this.
"Why are you telling me that?" I asked.
"Because I want you to know. I want you to know, why I'm leaving. I'm not into women Madison. I know you like me and you must have been wondering why I didn't like you back. I'm sorry." He looked at me sadly and I thought about happy times, when I was ten and Josh came to serve under my father, straight from their school. He was cheerful and I took to him, and he would entertain me in his free time, when I came to spend weekends with my parents. And then I fell for him and the more I wanted him to see me as a woman the less interested he was until he started to disappear, go for missions and such when I came.
"You have nothing to be sorry for." I said even though I felt strangely numb.
"I do. I am sorry for withdrawing my friendship like I did, for leaving you confused and lonely. I'm sorry for telling you the truth, so you could find some other object of your teenage affection and we could still be friends. I am sorry for leading you on and using you as a smokescreen. We serve the church that condemns men who... are like me. And I was ashamed and tried so hard to prove, that I was a real man and worthy... That's why I am leaving. I don't know if I will tell this to our Commander, but I wanted to tell you." He finished and I thought for a while about looks Garret and Tristan gave me each time I mentioned Josh.
"I think he knows." I said absentmindedly and suddenly my face scrunched and hot tears flowed down my hit cheeks.
Josh might have tried to hide as good as he could but Garret and Tristan knew, and who else? Peter? Mom and dad? I was a great joke for everyone. Everyone knew everything but me. Little Madison, doesn't need to know anything. Let her try and try again walk into a closed doors. I felt Josh embracing me and resting his chin on the top of my head. As I have dreamt of him doing so many times. I wept and wept until the was exhausted and got hiccups.
Josh hugged me and murmured something calming that I didn't hear.
"You're a good person Madison. You are smart and kind and you deserve so much better, than your dad ignoring you." Josh said suddenly as if he was holding it back but couldn't help himself in the end. I looked up at him. My face was swollen and wet but I couldn't make him even less into women, and I actually didn't care. He looked at me with this sweetness I remembered from my childhood, when he would play with me after his watch and I told him about girls in my school and what we played. Suddenly his interest in our plays seemed suspicious. Oh Madison. With this caring look on his face he hugged me closer and said.
"I mean this Madison. Don't chase him in every man that ignores you or won'tgive you what you want. There are plenty of people who will easily love you for who you are. Who will want to spend time with you just for you."
I was dumbstruck with this and didn't know what to say between an urge to defend my dad and to cry again. Instead I pressed my face to his chest and enjoyed getting my friend back, even if this was only to lose him again immediately.
"I will miss you." I whispered.
"You could come visit me." He said and I was shocked. "I am leaving the Order of St George, not you. If you still wish to know me, now that you know... we could hang out someday, when you're adult and free yourself." He really liked me. It meant something for me, that I couldn't completely understand why right then. We had tonight to catch up. We would try.

Tristan
"This is it, everybody is accounted for." Mrs. Knight announced as Stealth's blood disappeared putting Mike, a soldier who was supposed to cover Joseph but got grabbed by a vessel and dropped on a nearby roof breaking his spine, pelvis and cracking his skull. Mike was unlucky not to die immediately and lucky to not die until we've found him.
Stealth was careful to smear every scratch and bruise and when she was done Mike was staring at her shivering naked in the cold of falling night.
Mrs. Knight gave him a blanket and led him off the roof for further examination. Stealth didn't follow this time, she stood with the empty plastic cup in her hand and watched them go down the ladder. I turned to her. Memory of a view over rocks splattered with guts and blood, stench of death and her being the cause of it all warred with the thought what would today have been for me and many others without Stealth.
"Thank you." I said finally. She nodded and sighed. "I will be leaving soon." She said.
"What? No, don't go. Talon will be after you, together we stand a better chance." I said and meant it. I might have been afraid of Stealth, but I wasn't stupid.
"Cobalt won't let me stay, and I don't want to fight him on this. At least not yet." She said.
"It was nice to work with you today. You were quite amazing with the first transport." She said and I was surprised with how much pleasure it caused me to hear it.
"You were amazing too. I know I would be dead without you. Thank you for saving my life and helping me heal." I said and this time I felt more gratitude than disgust.
She stepped to take hold of my hand and lifted it to her face. Then with a St George pen, I didn't see her lifting from the office she wrote a series of digits on the inside of my palm.
"It's unlikely, but if you happened to need me you can text me." She said and winked. I have been pressing my body against hers half of the day but somehow this touch felt inappropriately intimate. I said "Thanks" staring at my hand still tingling with a memory of her touch. Then I went off the roof to find Garret and "report" to him before Ward and Knight give him too much trouble for his ex girlfriend nearly killing us all today.

Garret
I sat in "Commander's office" with only Tristan and Riley. The others either slept or tried to in the larger room next to this. We were all still here. Twenty soldiers, Archie, Mrs. Knight and Madison.
It was hard to keep appearances in front of everyone, and now I didn't want to do this anymore. Riley and Tristan deserved to know my mind on this. Because they were my friends and as a safety measure, in case I was going insane.
Riley was filling Tristan in about the hatchling training facility that we were to attack and what a bitch Stealth was. Tristan looked tired.
"Guys I need to tell you something." I interrupted them at last. It was almost midnight and everyone needed to get some sleep.
"Something is wrong with Ember." I said and Riley snorted.
"No, I mean. This is not her. Something has happened and I am going to find out what. Once my people are safe." I said.
"This can take you very long time to achieve." Riley said slowly. "I ran from Talon for twelve years and never for a minute I felt, that we were safe."
"Then help me. You've been with her all this time. What happened?" I was desperate for some clue as to how I could help Ember, even if she didn't want help.
Riley looked away and I sensed, that there was something he didn't want to talk about. I waited.
"Ember... I don't know kid. Some things I just cannot tell you. She's a completely different person now. She's been sick a lot, but it could be because she's pregnant." Riley stopped and squirmed!
Tristan whistled and sat up in his chair as if getting ready to get between us.
I felt it like a punch to the gut, I just stared at him for a while not knowing what to think, less what to say.
At last I managed. "She is pregnant?"
"Yes, with me, before you ask." Riley answered all tense and awkward.
Ember was pregnant with Riley... And she has just tried to kill all my people, wipe them out with a massive attack of nearly one hundred of soulless clones. While she made me leave them under the pretense of signing a treaty to help them. I was furious and my heart ached in my chest at her betrayal yet some part of me couldn't stop loving her. I was almost scared at the intensity of this. She was in trouble and needed help. And I would do anything to help her. Even if she didn't love me anymore. Even if she was to lay Riley's egg and I would never be with her how I wanted to.
"I think something more than... this is amiss. Ember is not herself and she suffers. I saw this in her today. And I am going to help her. I cannot leave her like this." I insisted after a while and Tristan watched me with frown as if he saw something. Riley looked at me and said carefully. "I'm sorry kid. I know that you love her. And she'd probably have been better off with you than with Talon. But right now she is hunting us. She might not want you dead but she'll kill each and every single men and woman in the Order.
"She doesn't want me dead?" I asked surprised.
"When you stormed out she said to me 'go watch him for me' this attack was planned to keep you out of harm's way." Riley said and a thought struck me.
"Is that why you are here?" I asked Riley. He looked down and thought for a moment.
"Who knows? I want to free Autumn and the others, I want to help you defend from vessel attack. But would I be able to do anything without her leave?" He looked at me and shrugged and there was some helplessness in the gesture, that I have never seen in him before. I decided to let it go for now.
"I don't know either how deep this goes. I want you to know Tristan, so that you don't let me sacrifice the men for this. That you stop me if I go mad." I said.
Tristan laughed and rubbed his face. "You mean more mad than this? Joke man. You're right to keep it from Ward and Knight. Let's get some sleep it's midnight."
Riley stood up at that. "You sleep, I need to talk to Mist and it's morning in London soon. Besides I have to talk to Stealth."
Tristan looked up at that. "Cannot she just stay? She's been helpful, we all owe her our lives." He said.
Riley grimaced. "Yup and I don't want her to take them. You have no idea what a viper is St George. I don't want her anywhere near my dragonells."
I saw that Tristan wasn't convinced but he just fisted his hand and rose to leave.
"Nighty." He said and left sending Riley a sharp look.

"Stealth you must leave." I said to her later on in cold darkness of desert night. "There's no way I'm sleeping while you're around and I need my sleep. You've helped them, when they needed you. Now they don't anymore, please. Talon will search for you, now that you've betrayed them. Let's not put all the eggs in one basket." I pleaded.
"Why do you dislike me so much Cobalt? I've saved your life once." She asked in return. "It's not personal. I just don't like vipers." It was true actually. "How come you have two human forms?" I asked the question that nagged me since she shifted for the first time after dropping St Anthony off.
"Professional reasons. Indigenous woman attracted attention in many places, that I... worked, so chief face master retrained me to also shift into plain white woman." She sighed. "Chief face master?" I asked. "She died hundred years ago and her position was never refilled. Movies and pictures took over her role I guess." Shit, too much new information I had no way to integrate all this now, and still I asked. "And the blood magic healing?"
Stealth shrugged. "There's actually an opera about it."
"I'm serious. I tried to save "Commander Sebastian" once he got shot and was dying of blood loss, we pumped a liter of my blood into him through a transfusion and still it took him days to recover." I insisted.
"I don't know Cobalt. It may be because you're barely more than a hatchling. Or cause our magical abilities are strongest in our true form. Also you're not supposed to pump them full of your blood, just let your blood touch their skin...We used to do this once Talon had less servants, to heal their wounds or extend their lives. Since then the organization have changed the course and we no longer do anything for humans who serve us... except for paying them. I haven't heard this talked about in hundreds of years." She said and I had to accept this for now, I nodded.
"I need to take care of certain stuff Cobalt. But I will be back. You don't want to be my enemy and you don't need to be." She said seriously. Then she turned around run few steps, leapt into the sky shifting midstride and flew away, only the rush of air pumped by her wings giving away that a huge dragon have just been there. I tried to follow her with my sight, the stars winking out where she passed but I soon lost track of her movements. Shit, this was a crazy day. I needed rest. But first I would call Mist.