Chapter Four

Two months later
Bremerhaven Naval Base

Time sometimes got away from Georg when he let himself get into the throes of things on the base. If he focuses on the military aspects only and ignored the political implications of it all he would be able to get through this, get home, and live in peace with his growing family.

The one thing the Captain made sure to do each day, no matter how engrossed her let himself get in the work, was write Maria. He sat down with a cup of sludge coffee to pen his daily correspondence.

Dearest Maria,

Nearly two months have gone by and still I'm at Bremerhaven. I'm so close to you, yet so far away. Each night I pray with all my strength Germany will relent and I can return home, to you, to our children, to our home. We haven't been together long enough to be separated so indefinitely.

I miss you, my love. I miss your laughter during the day, your music, and at night I miss your arms, your kisses, your caresses, the irrevocable comfort you could bring to me with your body and soul. I need you at night, Maria. When the base is quiet and I am alone, that is when I need you most, for that is when I feel the whip against my back, the knife in my heart, ripping away flesh and blood. It is only memories of our last night that keep me going.

I've told you I bury myself in work, and that's very true, but I can never not think of you. I know where you will be in your pregnancy, you're probably getting over the sickness little by little and being filled with an amazing energy that you can't explain. It's indescribable for the father to watch his child grow, I cannot fathom the sensation you feel, my sweet.

As I write this, I've received new orders. In two days time, my submarine will depart for the Adriatic. I don't know how long I'll be out of touch, but I want you to know you'll be in my heart. There will be a letter every day ready to go when we surface again.

How are you fairing? How are the children? Is Liesl still seeing the young student? Has Brigitta kept up her geography grade? Please don't stop writing, it's all I have to hold onto here, our letters. I shall see you again soon, I pray.

Till then, I am, as I ever was and ever shall be,

Yours,

Georg

Georg signed his name in a flourish and took off his glasses laying them on his desk. He cherished her wrote and each on he received, but no letter would or could compare to being with his wife and family.

Perhaps, now that his submarine was actually being being deployed the days would go by faster and be full of the purpose of bringing the boys in his charge home to their families. Perhaps being in active combat would stop the ache in his heart or at least disguise it enough to make it bearable. If he had something to occupy his mind, perhaps he would not miss Maria and the children as much as he did.

"Captain," Georg's musings were interrupted by his aide, a young lieutenant named Thomas Kretzer. "The men are ready for inspection, Sir."

Georg nodded and rose from his desk. He missed this part. He missed being in command of his ship, of his men, only if he could be part of the right side. That's what got him through the first time, believing in what he was fighting for. War was killing, killing your enemies, so why was he now killing for them?

Villa von Trapp

Darling Georg,

I feel your side of our bed empty, and I weep for you to be next to me. I miss you more each day than even I thought was possible. I thought with time the loneliness would become part of me; that I'd get used to it, but instead it seems to haunt me more.

I'm glad you are still at Bremerhaven and saf. I dread the day when you write and tell me you'll be in active combat. As long as you are on the base, I know that someday you'll come home to us; to me.

The children are doing well. Liesl is actively dating Warren (the student) but seems interested in Andrew. He's a young groundskeeper at the von Klopper villa. I'm unsure though of his alignment.

I'm concerned about Friedrich, though, Georg. Since you've left, he's been acting up and out. He's taken to calling me Maria, which is fine, but disturbing since he once called me Mother. There are other things to Georg that disturb and unnerve me. I'm afraid he crossed over and I don't know what to do. I've explained the issue, but still I fear I've not gotten through.

Brigitta is improving in her geography, but she still struggles without your expert help. Kurt shows your skills at cartography though and helps her quite a bit.

Your eight child seems to have my mannerisms. He or she keeps me awake nights with sickness I should have in the mornings. Frau Schmidt tells me this part should be ending soon and I'll get to feel amazing for a while before I turn into a whale.

Don't stop writing, every day my dearest friend.

Till then, I am, as I ever was and ever shall be,

Yours,
Maria

Maria signed her name to Georg's letter, licked the envelope, and put it on the bedside table. She missed Georg terribly at night and read and reread every letter he'd written her.

"Mother?" Liesl's soft voice came into Maria's thoughts as she rested against the pillows. "I brought you some soup. Do you think you could eat a little?"

What Maria had written in her letter to Georg had been a lie. Her morning sickness was not getting better, if anything, it was getting worse. It was so bad in fact, that she's lost ten pounds instead of gaining any weight at all. She was now confined to bed until her condition improved.

Maria nodded in answer to her daughter's question and took the soup plate from her. "Have a seat beside me, Liesl. Keep me company."

Liesl sat beside her mother and her eyes fell on the letter, "Another letter to Father? What did you say?"

Maria smiled, "Everything. Nothing. Writing keeps me from missing him too much," she said with a sad sigh.

"I can't believe he's still at the naval base only two hours away and he has not come home to see you. Surely, I thought he'd come home once he learned that you were put on bedrest, if only to lay down the law around here with us and the staff."

Maria studied the top of the sheets, "He doesn't know."

"What do you mean? You mean you didn't tell him? Mother, Father would want to know that this pregnancy is making you so ill," Liesl protested. "He'd want to know so he could come home…"

Liesl did not get a chance to finish her sentence for Maria's face paled and took on the look that it did when she was about to be sick. With practiced precision, Liesl moved the soup plate out of the way and handed her mother the chamber pot. When the spasm subsided, Liesl retrieved a cool wash rag from the washroom and dabbed the perspiration off of Maria's forehead.

"Mother, this is getting bad. You really should get another doctor to look at you," Liesl told her. "If you told Father, he could send for one. I don't understand why you don't tell him. You say he's your best friend, but you keep him in the dark."

"Dr. Burke is the only one we can trust, Darling," Maria murmured, the fragility of her voice demonstrating her weakness. "He's the only one your Father would approve of. As for the other question, it's because he is my best friend that I don't let on what's going on here at home. When a man is off to battle, Liesl, fighting in a war, what happens at home has to be very simple, he cannot be distracted by anything! He must not know."

Maria's reasoning made sense, but Liesl knew her father. He would be livid with all of them for not taking the initiative to send for him or at least ask him to seek additional help on their behalf. He was still on the base; he wasn't in any danger now. Liesl continued to soothe her mother until she fell asleep, uneasy as it may be, "We'll just see about that," she said under her breath.

Louisa was heading up the stairs as Liesl came down with the half eaten bowl of soup. "How's mother?"

"She's resting. Can you keep an eye on things for a bit, I need to go into town. I have to send a telegram to Father."

"Why? He should come on his own if he knows..." Louisa began.

"He doesn't know, but he will. She can't go on like this and nothing anyone is trying has worked. If she doesn't lose the baby, she could get even weaker, if she does lose the baby, that might be too much too. She doesn't want Father to know, but I must tell him. I have to."