Tobirama wakes to relieve himself as the dawn spills out across the valley. When he returns, he finds Izuna stretched out across the futon, bathed in the soft light of early morning and having made no effort to cover herself.
Pressing kisses into the soft arch of her foot, the knot of her ankle, the bend of her knee, he continues on until he reaches the apex of her thighs so he might bring her to pleasure with his mouth. When he crawls over her, she's still soft and warm with sleep, rolling onto her stomach to stretch her spine as she presses back against him. It's so easy, then, to slip inside of her while he tastes the knot of her neck.
She takes his full weight and he loses himself in the way she reaches back to grasp at him and moans low into the futon. It feels impossible to track the time but when she pushes him off, the room has brightened and he sees her in full as she turns to push up on her elbows and pull him close once more with her legs.
"I want to see," she breathes, eyes burning bright.
Together, they watch where they're joined, the way she takes him until they're hip to hip, without strain. Izuna, seemingly as overwhelmed as he is, pushes forward into his lap to grind their hips together and he cannot hold himself back from speaking.
"Your body knows the shape of me."
"Perfectly."
•
As is becoming his habit, Tobirama cannot help but toy once he's finished inside of her.
He takes her hips in his hands and Izuna's world spins as he drags her so she falls back, pulling until her hips are near level with his chest and she is left entirely, unbearably exposed. Tobirama holds her in place by her waist and licks his own spend from the crease of her. It's utterly humiliating and he's never brought her to a second climax quicker than he does now.
Afterward, they dress enough so as not to scandalize anyone when their breakfast is brought. Izuna feels dazed and finds herself grinning through their meal, too content to help herself.
Of course, their good spirits cannot last forever, and she watches as the weight of the coming day settles onto her husband's shoulders. Izuna, though, feels somewhat serene even still. Calm in the face of what's to come.
"Will you take your tea today?" Apprehension is clear in his voice, she leans into his side to kiss his jaw before returning to her food. It's clear he's irritated, likely feels she isn't taking it seriously enough, but there's no use in feeding his worries with her own.
"This evening. Time enough to ask your brother's help and explain his absence to my own." She tries to lighten the mood between them. "I hope the two of you won't get so caught up in argument that the village falls apart while you're left to yourselves."
Beside her, he stiffens.
"Izuna, you cannot expect me to keep away—"
"I do." She hates to hurt him, but there can be no leniency out of love in this. "You'll have to. It's already enough of an imposition to take your brother from his village and his pregnant wife—"
"Mito tires of his help and your brother will manage fine for some days—"
"It's not about managing, Tobirama." He is not half so much the rational thinker he believes himself to be, in her mind. Though, he tries. "I will already have to inform Hashirama that I still refuse a child—"
"We," Tobirama cuts her off, insistent. "Have I not made it clear that our feelings are the same, in this?"
"We," she amends, gentling her tone. "With Mito unable to burden herself, keeping you both would have the responsibilities of five heaped on one. I am not so obscenely selfish. Regardless, to leave Madara as the only one unable see me through would torture him. You cannot ask that of me."
He says nothing.
"I cannot put myself before the village, and if I could you wouldn't care half so much." He has a face like he wishes to argue, but cannot bring himself to it. She's right, and he knows as much.
Eventually, he relents.
"I see your reasoning, though I do not enjoy it."
"You rarely do." Izuna pulls herself closer to him. Leans into his side and wonders how he ever got through the war with such propensity for worry, or if this has only come now he has time for it.
"I will be the one to tell my brother. You've borne enough of the burden between us." His voice carries guilt she cannot alleviate and does not always want to, but she will not force him to linger in it.
"Of course. I will seek out Madara and leave Hashirama to you. Speaking of, are things well between you? He kept you late last night." Guilt, not enough to be consuming, but certainly present, pushes her to ask.
"As well as can be expected."
"I am sorry, Tobirama. I do not regret my demands, but I am not pleased for my part in the strife between you."
"There's no need. Hashirama and I have always clashed over matters of severity, this is no different, and we aren't entirely without understanding."
"You are sure?"
"I am. I did not openly defy him, after all, nor would I, and he understands the impression disavowing my actions would give. He intends to make them the standard for similar offences, but he has concerns over my priorities." Izuna's first instinct is to ask what he means, but when he looks at her, she knows. She would laugh, were it not quite so absurd.
"That's ridiculous." Izuna does not speak with modesty, only truth. "You would never—"
"I told him as much. The—shift in my perspective is difficult for him, not out of disagreement, but belief. After so many years of our inability to see eye to eye on the Uchiha and the village itself, he worries I've not had a change of heart so much as I've been blinded by infatuation." Izuna laughs openly at that.
"Your brother is mistaken. You loved me far before you trusted me, and could only truly be denied insomuch as you were willing to deny yourself. There was nothing to push you so far as you've come."
Tobirama runs a hand over her hair, turns down to face her. She wonders if he feels known in a way similar to her own.
"Hashirama worries. The habit of an older brother."
"True enough. Still, has he not seen you attempt a civil conversation with my brother?" She teases, only half a joke. It's certainly not an effort she'd demand, painful to watch as it is. "Nothing but the most sincere change in heart could convince you to try, however unsuccessfully."
"You praise me and insult my efforts in one breath."
"A talent I possess." She grins up at him and leans into her to kiss the expression from her lips, pulling back with a sigh
"I suppose I cannot be too surprised you've found the effort so wanting, regardless of my opinions on the Uchiha, your brother is unbearable. His arrogance—"
"Something you know nothing of," she teases. He rarely finds the same amusement in his faults as she does, but today, he humours her.
"You still think me so arrogant?" Izuna sits up to take his face in her hands, running gentle fingers over his temples, his cheeks, before gripping his chin and biting at his lip.
"I know that you are."
"And you love me even so." She cannot keep from smiling, then.
"Despite the innumerable flaws in your character."
"So rude," he laments. There is a dry tease to his tone.
"Some would say honest."
"I say otherwise."
"A flaw of my own, then."
They do not part with the same ease with which they woke, but nearer to it than she'd feared.
Izuna takes tea with her brother.
As expected, he does not relish the news, but not does he worry so much as her husband does. He's seen her through worse, afterall, and he'd been there when she learned of the pregnancy. There's no surprise between them in this outcome.
"I don't look forward to days spent with only your dour husband for company. When he's even more miserable than usual, no less."
"Keep your spirits high, brother. He would be well served by a distraction, a wonderful excuse for you to taunt him as I know you so love, is it not?"
"You aren't wrong. Small mercies, I suppose."
Madara asks if there's anything he might do to ease her recovery, as she'd hoped he would, and she hands over the note she's written for the physician. He demands to know whether or not it would be too much to be treated again so soon, unwilling to have any part in her hurting herself further, and Izuna laughs.
His protection can grow grating, at times, but after all they've lost between them, she cannot say she'd behave any differently, and there is always comfort and amusement both to be found in the consistency of his reactions.
She invites him to read the note for himself and assures him she asks only for information. The scroll will take some days to prepare and she may not be well enough to collect it herself.
•
"I will help if you are sure in your request, brother, but I have to admit my concerns—" Hashirama's brow has drawn tight, and Tobirama tires at the thought of rehashing last night's conversation.
"Please, Hashirama. We have already spoken of this, I am not so blinded by love I would lose sight of myself—"
"No, no, brother, I am aware. That's a conversation we need not revisit, it's just—to think even my own brother no longer feels safe to raise a child within our own clan—what has gone wrong, Tobirama? It felt as though things were improving, but this last week—" Tobirama cannot bear the sadness in his brother's voice a moment longer.
"I swear, Hashirama, you aren't at fault for my fears. I would not have imagined peace to succeed as it has, nor the strength the village has found. Both are down to you, and by all accounts, we are both safer now than we were as children. The last week has changed little in our circumstance, I only understand better, now, what I did not before."
"I don't mean to sound ungrateful, Tobirama. I am immeasurably pleased that you see things as you do, but I cannot help struggling to understand how you've come to think as you do so suddenly. I pleaded with you for years, and it takes Izuna little more than one to change your view."
Tobirama imagines that most would hear only the plead for understanding carried by his brother's voice. The frustration is more subtle and entirely fair.
"I'm sorry I didn't see your words for their meaning sooner, Hashirama, but this change was not only down to Izuna. I cannot help but know the Uchiha better now. Not only my wife, but her brother and Kagami. I've seen for myself the love I was so sure they denied themselves and little of the madness I believed in. They are not as I thought, and now I am faced with the consequences of my own ignorance."
"I am sorry, Tobirama." Hashirama is too forgiving, as always. Gone is the frustration he had every right to, replaced by remorse Tobirama cannot fathom.
"What have you to be sorry for?"
"I appreciate your explanation, it helps but—regardless of your own role in the reason, I know you've hoped to sire children by Izuna since you were married. This cannot be easy for you." It stings, to be certain, but it feels only fair.
"She isn't the only one who denies the opportunity."
"It would seem to me as though that must hurt more, not less." A heavy breath leaves his lungs. Hashirama is not wrong.
"Perhaps, but I've brought it on myself." The pivot he reaches for is needed, both in reprieve and caution. "Hashirama, are you not troubled that we refuse the child the village needs? The child for which our marriage was made?" Hashirama's face lightens, then. Not quite so far as being pleasant, but easier, certainly.
"I will admit, I wish it weren't the case, but I would hardly have Izuna lose her life over it. If neither of you is willing, there's no point in allowing her to suffer for it."
"Thank you, brother. I know this time has not been easy between us." Hashirama grips his shoulder the same as he always has, and Tobirama cannot help but find comfort in the gesture.
"Growing pains," he assures him. "Not the last, I'm sure."
Both of them return home late. Tobirama finds repose in the ease Izuna shows around him now. The casual way she touches and teases, how she does not care to hide from him as she dresses down for the evening.
He feels tempted, but even more so, he feels trusted.
•
Izuna is leant over the table, inking a chart upon which to track her cycle once it resumes, when Tobirama settles behind her on his knees and pulls her into his lap. He is warm, and she allows herself to recline back against him, work abandoned before her as she turns her face into the softness of his of his skin.
"Things went well with your brother?" She punctuates the question with a kiss, resting her hands over his as she tilts her head and closes her eyes.
"He wasn't so surprised, given recent events. He'll come when we call for him, and I will take his place."
"I'm sorry you cannot stay." His arms tighten over her waist.
"Once you are well, I intend to ask that he train me further as a healer. It's too late to learn for you now, but when you next conceive, I have no desire to be left reliant on anyone else if our children need help." It aches to hear him speak with such certainty of their future. A reminder of all they deny themselves now.
"Please, let's not talk of—"
"Of course, my love." He presses a kiss to the crown of her hair. "How did Madara take your news?"
"Easily. He was with me when I discovered—there were no surprises in what I had to tell him." For as at ease as she's felt throughout the day, there is more difficulty in speaking openly now than she expected.
"Did you ask him to be reasonable while you are gone?"
"Not at all, I asked that he keep you far too busy to worry after me." He scoffs.
"Impossible."
"Tobirama—"
"I know, Izuna. I know. Were our positions reversed, would you not worry, even so?" Privately, she thinks she would certainly worry less, but saying so would help nothing.
For a long time, Tobirama simply holds her. Izuna strokes his arms where they circle hold her in place, his hair where he hides his face in her neck. When his hand slips past her hem to work her wet, she doesn't deny him.
Although Izuna hasn't settled on a method, she knows, once she recovers, it will be some time before she can have him like this again. Until her cycle has settled, at the very least.
When they've pushed their clothes aside and off, she settles back against his chest and takes a moment to linger over the rise and fall of his body against hers. Match their breathing. The echo of his body in hers has lingered throughout the day, but it's nothing compared to the feeling of him inside her now.
•
When they are finished, and he has held her far too long, unable to shake the fear this is his last opportunity to do so, Izuna retrieves the sachet of sweet-smelling herbs from the box by her bed and takes her tea.
Tobirama sits anxious and resigned at her side, cursing himself for every word spoken in ignorance. It will do them no good, now, and he is not prone to wallowing, has no patience for it, but he watches her throat work as she drinks and fights the urge to smash the ceramic in her hand and demand a better way, though he knows there isn't one.
•
For the first hour, she feels nothing.
In the second, she becomes tired, dizzy enough Tobirama must help her to lie down. Settling her in her futon and watching her as though he expects her to collapse in on herself before his eyes.
When the third hour passes, Izuna begins to feel quite pleasant. The cramping in her stomach fades, and her body begins to feel lighter, as if it could be stretched out beyond her physical being.
She looks up and finds new worlds in the grain of the wooden ceiling. Faces and textures she wishes she could reach out and touch. Tries, only to be gently rebuked by Tobirama at her side. When she speaks, he frowns—different to the way he normally does. More deeply set, something urgent playing at the corners of his eyes.
Izuna tries to tease him, but her tongue refuses to cooperate and there is something sickly swelling below her ribs.
•
Tobirama is well aware that Izuna had hoped to get through the night without the help of Hashirama, to inconvenience him as little as possible, but her fever climbs quick and her heartbeat has become rapid. He cannot wait any longer.
Hashirama is there when he calls, assuring Izuna, only half-conscious and still resentful at being so vulnerable, that Madara stays with Mito tonight and will do so each night he's away. Strange, but Tobirama has no mind for it, now.
Izuna loses consciousness and his brother assures him it's for the best. What waits for her will not be pleasant, and the stress on her system would only be worse if she were awake to feel it.
Tobirama asks what there is to be done, Hashirama confirms what he'd feared. The only course of action that doesn't result in a waste is to allow the herbs to run their course, keep her from the brink and spare her too much pain. Otherwise, Izuna must suffer their symptoms. It's the only way to be sure the desired outcome is achieved.
He must look as sick as he feels, because Hashirama is quick to reassure him that if luck smiles on them, the quick onset of her symptoms will mean quick relief in turn.
Of course, luck is not on their side.
A/N: Took a week off from writing this because life got busy and I needed to prioritize 💜 That said, I've made heavy revisions to the previous chapter, and lighter ones to the rest of the story. I was in rough shape when I wrote the last chapter, so I wanted to touch it up and figured I might as well polish everything while I was at it. Hope you're all still enjoying the story, we're in the home stretch 💫