Year 1998 | First Seventh of May
Chapter 2
Afternoon | The 'New Beginning' Ceremony at Hogwarts
She stepped away from him and apparrated back at her parents' old house in London; seeking refuge for at least few hours in her old bed– before putting on the "Golden Brain" title role once again.
Playing the role she crossly consented, Hermione Granger found herself watching the late afternoon sky above the fabled Hogwarts Castle that is now in ruins. Vaguely, she could hear Kingsley Shacklebolt making a speech about worthiness of life and death... and the in-between... and indubitably confronting it today... and in the days to follow... in thousands different ways.
Yes, thousands of more or less wrestling with rage, guilt, shame, desolation, sorrow, anguish, exhaustion…the entirety almost let a grunt out of Hermione at the absurdity of the thousands suppositions... But frankly at the moment, it really seems just one black hole within her— sucking her in a massive desire to just run away... and escape…
But right now, unforgivingly, escape is beyond her grasp, for a little bit more.
Hermione arrived at Hogwarts almost at the last second before the ceremony began, and purposely eliminated any opening for conversation with anybody. Certainly she is in no mood for pleasantries or platitudes. In fact, she immediately sought Harry, Ron and Kingsley to make a dutiful appearance to 'prove' that she had held her part.
Like her, the boys were gunning for a slightly obscure area to stay or at least blend in the background until they could leave. However, their disinclination on the whole 'Golden Trio' reprisal had aggravated even more when they were requested (more like instructed) to literally stand side by side like a diorama during the ceremony proper. They are to provide an illustration of this afternoon's message— Embarking together as one into new beginning.
Nearing the end of her temper but not wanting to make a scene, Hermione gritted her teeth as she caught Harry's face. The increased worry lines on his forehead made her hold back the numerous curses wanting to break out from her lips.
"What is so difficult to just stand over there for you three?"
An idiotic organiser thoughtlessly and stupidly asked and Hermione wrapped her hands around herself tighter to not reach for her wand and hex the idiot as again she caught Harry's olive eyes and the guilt in them seemed to surface at ten-fold. She really does not want to pass more to him, not after everything. So her low strained voice cut the argument, "Lets just get this done soonest" and then allowed to be lead to where they were supposed to be.
When another idiotic person attempted to get them to give a speech, she vehemently shook her head. And yet the idiot aggressively pushed it. Hermione found herself uncapping the hold on her temper when she heard Harry ominously said, "The three of us will walk away right now if you insist."
With that, even Kingsley strode to them and asked the Ministry employee to leave it be.
Hermione could feel most eyes turning to the three of them and deduced that Kingsley had reached the part of his speech about them. She nearly slip-up with physical recoil upon tuning in and catching him account three friends partaking in the fight for life, freedom and essence of true magic. Not that she finds the Minister being untruthful; it was indeed about friends, life, freedom and magic. But so as other's involvement whose names weren't Harry, Ron and Hermione. Of course her brain can read the need for inspiration to rally forward, is just that the dramatization is enough to make her puke today's breakfast and lunch she neither had.
As Kingsley continues with his commendation of their roles in the war, Hermione almost let out a humorless laugh at the opposing physical reactions of her best friends. At her right side, she can feel an intensified stiffening tension from Harry, a total contrast to Ron's further dropping at her left side. Perhaps out of habit of looking out for her best friends regardless of one's wretchedness, very imperceptibly Hermione uttered under her breath the word "almost".
She knew that both would catch her mumbling and understand that their sore condition and the absurdity of it all will be over very soon.
Furthermore, she knew that letting them know that they are together in it would strangely comfort them. The shared feeling is a comforting and yet a disturbing indication of their present state. But it did demonstrate how connected they have become as a bloody trio.
When Kingsley made reference to "Brains of the Trio", Hermione cemented her stare ahead, and affixed a thicker blanket of nothingness on her face, even with a swirling suffocation encasing her. She noticed again the clear bright sky bearing down on them, and it fuelled the sense of inanity... Madness of having to stand on this ground under such amiable weather for a ceremony of "New Beginning" into a lighter world, when barely five days ago, darkness had come on the same ground, ending lives in a battle that at that time seemed to last for eternity.
For every passing second, it was snapping at her almost empty reserve of self-restrain, lashing at her to find an escape. To take the flight.. To what?.. To where?.. Or to whom?...
'No, don't… don't go there, people are watching you. Do not be caught of your misery, as it will lead to questions you cannot answer.'
Hermione rebuked herself and forced herself to endure for more. She kept her head away from matters rallying inside her heart as right now is the worst time to let them out.
As soon as the proper ceremony ended and before other people can reach them, Hermione pulled Harry and Ron to her, hugged both and in one breath told them, "I need to go now, I'll see you in few days. I'll be fine."
Ron squeezed one of her hands and Harry gave her a kiss on the cheek; both are sufficient responses from her best friends. The exchange have delivered and accepted the support conveyed amongst the three of them, a profound testament of their friendship.
Harry and Ron let go of Hermione and tactically shielded her away from the incoming family and friends, from hugs and greetings, and from the generally view of other people. Hermione knew that Ginny would be the first to reach them. Without looking back, she could picture Ginny embracing Harry and Ron and would try to reach for her too. Then somehow she heard Harry, "Hermione needs to go. Don't follow Gin." Hermione still did not look back and did not stop. But she could tell that the conveyed message was understood instantly by Ginny. Hermione would even guess how Ginny would shift to a spot to deliberately add to cover her departure.
Hermione with her head slightly down, headed towards the direction of the Hogwarts gate with a steady pace, making her movement soundless to not draw attention to her leaving. Only when she arrived at a far, far clearing where no one is around, that she lifted her head, and decided that it was safe to take one look at what she just left.
Blurrily she saw her two best friends surrounded by a lot of people but obviously closely screened out by the red-hair Weasleys. Their human wall for Ron and Harry from the rest of the crowd was unmistakable, but even with that, she felt relief to be absent there. And from the lack of any friends pursuing her, she appreciated Harry and Ron's managing to keep everyone's notice away from her exit.
Hermione shifted her gaze from the direction of her friends, to the reason of who had actually made her postponed her departure. The reason for stalling her leaving is not because she sought to make a final check on her friends. The truth is, in the throngs of witches and wizards, there is someone— someone she wants to take an unguarded look, to stash a bountiful image, and hoard them in her head before her flight.
Even in such distance, Hermione could not contain her astonishment at the gracious, diplomatic and yet commanding stance and gestures coming from the very subject of her attention. What's more bewildering are the invisible walls that kept everyone out. It seemed that the Wizarding of Britain is all too accustomed of this individual's heavy disposition on privacy and the erected parapets. On more than one occasion, she heard the anecdote that one has easier time breaking out of Azkaban than breach the protective walls of this person... And so not for the first time, she wondered if she will ever be so lucky to discover a thoroughly stripped down version of such character.
'Alright, I have enough of you to feed my mind and last me for sometime.' Hermione thought, and intent to now really leave, she sighed, but then, the very subject of her observation had lifted a pair of emerald eyes towards her direction.
And then locked with hers for a moment.
Without question, Hermione was unprepared for the unexpected directness— particularly the lack of impregnable blockades usually employed in those eyes...
Despite the physical distance, and despite of how it was all too brief, Hermione was positive that for a moment, when they made contact with hers, those impossible green eyes were free of any barriers… She would know.
For years, perhaps more of the last two years before they left Hogwarts for Harry's quest, Hermione would watch those green eyes fortify the shield to hold everyone out. At first, her curiosity was by-product of her admiration for such formidable character. Then it migrated into intrigue, probing if anyone had been given a free pass to these walls. But all the observations lead her to a discovery of the variations… different styles for different people… but the walls are always present.
Except few seconds ago.
In that abrupt moment, those emerald eyes had fixed at hers— uncovered. Absolutely naked.
Hermione is regrettably ill equipped to fully receive the effects from those eyes. They were grave, they were pleading, and they were pained. They were also worried and a lot more she knew that were there, of which she had failed to discern. They were all too brief and far too much, especially for a normally unreadable eyes.
Alas, before Hermione's own eyes could communicate to question, walls had come up. Then emeralds wholly withdrawn, and re-directed to the Minister who is amongst the small circle of wizards and witches they are in.
Hermione watched a little more of the magnificent owner of such brilliant emerald eyes, and again marveled at the powerful way people were drawn to this person and be equally held back. Always the same, you are welcomed to draw near but never be given entry. The walls are too unconquerable.
'Didn't they say that women with the highest walls have the deepest love?' The arbitrary thought caused an unexpected shudder to pass through Hermione.
"You need to leave now," she mumbled, and berated herself for the gamble for still staying. "Do you want to expose yourself for all Britain's wizards and witches to bear witness?"
The agitation that passed over at the thought of being the laughing stock propelled her to finally exit. When she reached the apparating spot outside Hogwarts, she had convinced herself that somehow she had not completely lost her mind. For the most part, she could still make a sound decision to run away and save herself from humiliation.
An absolute humiliation if anyone finds out the swirling emotions within her soul.
A guaranteed humiliation if anyone could read the longing harboring in her heart.
A longing invoked singularly by the owner of those emerald eyes, the most venerated witch without a doubt— a witch named Minerva McGonagall.
End of Chapter 2 | Year 1998 | The 'New Beginning' Ceremony at Hogwarts
Who else would own such emerald eyes?
AN: I am just borrowing from JK Rowling her marvelous characters and spinning them into my liking.