Winds of Change

by Blossomangel85

It has been a month since Joe White's death and since Steve McGarrett has been back to his Island. The only person he has let in has been Catherine Rollins. She was his first call only hours after Joe White's death. This is their month in Montana. A lot of it was formulating a plan.. The rest was falling in love again.

5. Chapter 5

The Winds of Change

Fandom: Hawaii Five-O

Ship: McRoll

Characters: Steve McGarrett, Catherine Rollins

Chapter 5: Me ke aloha aloha

(With tender loving care)

This lifestyle was starting to wear Catherine down, you could never have any kind of semblance of a life with the CIA, even the Navy was better for having a life and a career then the CIA. When you are in with an agency like the CIA, you don't have much of a life at all and she was starting to tire of it and ready to settle down and set down some roots of her own, make a home and a life for herself, with Steve if he ever would have her back, still needing to ask the question about Lynn and if she would be okay with him being here with Catherine, not aware they were no longer together.

Though she had been committed to the cause, it wasn't her decision to join up to the CIA. She had been recruited because it was the only way to stop Steve from falling into further trouble with the agency. It was around the time just after the CIA had attempted to kill Steve with the bomb in the building where Steve and Danny were trapped. It was the only way to keep Steve and the rest of five-o safe because if she hadn't agreed to it, they were going to take down five-o and make sure Steve would never be a bother to them again.

It was one reason why she loathed the lifestyle because she was unable to have any kind of meaningful friendships or relationships. You were cut off from the world and not even allowed to say what you did for a living to anyone at all. The day she had gone to speak to Steve about her mother and had met Lynn, she had tried not to feel hurt. After all he did say to her he wasn't going to wait for her, but still it hurt to see him moving on and knowing that till the day she retired, she wasn't able to settle down with anyone, least of all the one man that she still so desperately loved and wanted more than anything in the world.

Now, the agency didn't really like her going off mission to be with a man that had tried to bring them down, but they knew what a great asset Catherine was, so they let her go, but she had strict orders to be back for her next mission as soon as this was over. What the agency didn't know yet was that Catherine had been planning her resignation letter for a while now. She wanted out, even if Steve was taken and she knew she couldn't be with him anymore, she realized it was no way to live a life at all. She was ready to go home.

Smiling softly when he agreed with her plan, she helped him sit up a little and took the first aid kit and settled herself in his lap so that she could get a better look at his face. "Well, most of them look like they are healing nicely, but I do still think this one on your forehead needs stitches Steve". Sighing, he nodded, trying to not let the fact she was sitting in his lap affect his focus, but it was hard when all he wanted to do was hold her, wrap his arms around her and never let her go. "I kind of figured it would need some, how many do you think?" Looking once again and trying to concentrate, "Maybe three or four I think should do it".

Gathering the items she would need, she watched him as she began to work, rubbing some alcohol wipes over the cut to clean it and sterilize it, then began to get to work, "I'll try to be gentle", she was apologetic when she saw him wince a little, but aside from that, he was stoic, never once complaining at all about the pain. As she worked, Steve decided to try to fish for details on her love life, "So, there anybody special in your life? Any man that might need the Commander McGarrett special touch from?", he didn't want to feel jealous but even asking that question, it made his stomach feel sick at the possible answer she might give, though he almost breathed a sigh of relief when she answered, "Honestly, I don't, I'm free as a bird, how about you? It's hard to maintain a relationship when you are always on the go and never in one place. How are you and Lynn going?"

This was her in, her heart was racing as she said those words, and she felt a slightly nauseous as well. She wasn't sure she wanted to know how they were, but at the same time, she needed to know if there was any chance of the two of them rekindling their relationship. She focused on stitching Steve's cut up and took a slow breath in and out to cover her anxiety over what his answer would be. "Actually, Lynn broke up with me.. It was never anything really serious, for me anyway. I know Lynn wanted us to be more serious, but I just.. I couldn't do it, and to be honest, I think Lynn knew that she was never going to compare to you, I don't think she wanted to be second choice anymore".

There, the words he had been waiting forever to say. He didn't want Catherine to feel bad for possibly contributing to his break up with Lynn, but he did want her to know that even when he had attempted to move on, he had not really moved on at all. He had made all the right moves, made all the right speeches about it, but when it came down to it, he never did. If anything, he still had the ring in his drawer at home in Hawaii. She was it for him, and he didn't mind if she knew that this time, even if he couldn't be with her while she was in the CIA, all the stuff he sprouted about not being able to wait.. Seeing her here with him now, fixing up his cut, being there to help him avenge Joe's death, he was more then willing to wait now for as long as it took.

"Wow, I'd offer my condolences but it doesn't seem like you are all that broken up about it", her face had gone red at his words, and she tied to hide her face for a moment, turning her head to the side, though Steve had used his hand to move her head back he was looking into her eyes, gazing into them for a moment before he answered. "No, I'm not, To be honest, I am fairly certain that I was on the rebound.. Elle Clayton, a friend of my father had set us up and I didn't want to disappoint either of them, and it was nice for a while, but it's not who I wanted". Feeling her cheeks heating up even more, she bit her lip nervously, breathing in deeply when she asked the next question teasingly, but also genuinely as well as she settled herself further in his lap. "And who do you want Sailor?"

Chuckling a little with a soft smirk on his face, his hands moved to move the hair from her face, and then settled onto either side of her cheeks, "I think you already know the answer to that one Cat.. It's you.. It's always been you Cat". His voice was shaking a little at those words, and he leaned in, pressing his lips to hers, this time being the one to initiate the kiss, smiling against her lips when he felt her kissing back. There was a part of him that just knew that this was going to end in heartache for the both of them again, but this was the most honest he had been with her about anything and this conversation was long overdue, and he just knew that he had to enjoy the time he had with her while he could before something took one of them away from the other.

There was always heat behind their kisses, always passion and fire and this was no different. It only further added fuel her feelings for Steve even more, slowly igniting them into a beautiful fire. Pulling away just a little to check on his stitches, she smiled softly, "It's always been you too Steve", then softly declaring "All done", as she studied her handiwork and then put on a sterile water proof dressing over it, then looking around her face to see if he needed anymore stitches, "I think you're good to go shower now". She made a move to get off his lap when she felt his arm snaking around her waist and pulling her closer. "You got two choices, you could go make breakfast and start the coffee, or", he whispered teasingly, "You could join me in the shower..", shrugging his shoulders nonchalantly, "I mean only if you wanted to of course".

While his heart was breaking for Joe, it was also singing for Catherine. He was having so many conflicting emotions right now, going from being happy in Catherine's presence to nearly in tears when he remembered that Joe wouldn't be here to ever know this next chapter in this love story with Catherine. His head kept telling him not to go there yet, that it was too soon and that he was too broken and in too much pain over Joe's death to make any kind of rational decision, but his heart and his body were both telling him to give in and let her in. Here she was, right here and wanting to do anything to help him and be there for him, so why not just ride it out till the end and enjoy the time that he had with her here alone without the many distractions that come from being the team leader and Commander of five-o.

Tilting her head to one side, she let out a playful giggle, pretending to seriously contemplate her choices, "Well, I am very hungry and you know how hangry I get when I have no food in me, but on the other side... I don't think I have showered since leaving the hotel where I was staying so I might be best to just hijack your shower with you". She leaned in for one more kiss, but this time did slide over his lap, her feet making contact with the floorboards and then she was standing up, holding her hand out for him to take to help him up. "Okay, Come on Commander, let's go shower, eat, get some coffee in our systems and then we can talk about Joe and Tim and make a list of what needs to be done". Though things were still a little up in their air regarding their relationship, Catherine felt a lot happier knowing they both had finally said what they should have said all those years ago.

Author's Notes:

I really hope you all love this chapter as much as I do. I'm trying to keep things moving ahead with Joe and the avenging his death, but these first several chapters are going to cover a lot of ground on their relationship because I don't want them to beat around the bush anymore and keep silent on their feelings.

I also don't want them to just put aside their feelings because they feel they have a job to do or out of respect for Joe because we all know that Joe wanted them to be together and would have been happy to be looking down from heaven at them and be happy to see her there in Montana with him. I also wanted to get the Lynn issue out of the way early so that Catherine knows exactly where she stands with Steve.

Obviously we have no way of knowing what went down in the in that episode that wasn't shown so this is just my interpretation of it but the way I have described Catherine joining the CIA, I think it makes sense in a way because I don't think she would have ever willingly just left again unless she was under specific orders. If she wanted to leave after Kono's wedding, I think she wouldn't have been as devastated as she was when she was in the car crying.

Shout outs:

Zheth22:

Thank you so much for your review, I honestly think that their friendship/relationship is strong enough to have survived all they have been through together so it is just like falling back into their old habits that feel natural to them.

Isabellaelisa:

Awe thank you, I am so glad you enjoyed that chapter. I hope you liked this next one as well.

SteveMcGarrettLover:

I hope you notice I did take your suggestion on the showering together, but you will have to wait for next chapter to read the shower scene. ;)

Pilarmnavas:

Thank you for your review, I am glad you are enjoying it. I do believe there is a recent story by someone else that I read about Harry and Steve talking about that, but I can certainly see about doing a one shot of that myself if you are enjoying my writing style.

Prislynn:

You are welcome, and thank you very much for reading and supporting my story. It was a story I just felt needed to be told.

Navymcroll:

I am so glad you are enjoying this story, and I hope this chapter gives you more of those needs and wanted feels. I was excited writing it. I agree, the "I'm in this with you till the end' is one of my favorites and I know a lot of people tend to think it means till the end of avenging Joe's death but I think it means more. That she will always be there for him no matter what.

Guest:

Awe thank you, I am glad you are enjoying this story. They are my OTP for ships right now and it just feels so natural to write for them.