Chapter V Part 1: Deep Longing

The hot sun was beating down upon the hard earth that Priscilla was walking along. There were no other living beings for what seemed like miles and she was missing some key things: her Scout jacket, 3DMG, her weapons and flares. She certainly wasn't fit to be walking around in Titan territory, but that's where she found herself. Her mouth was dry and her stomach was painfully empty, not having eaten or drank anything for days – she wasn't even sure about how long she'd been out there by herself. More miraculous than her not dying due to lack of food or water was that she not only hadn't been devoured by a Titan, but rather that she hadn't seen one at all. The area outside Wall Rose was known to be dangerous, but no misfortune had come to greet her on death's doorstep.

Traitor

The word echoed painfully in her mind, it was one of the last things anybody had ever said to her before she was cast out – thrown away like the garbage she truly believed herself to be. There was no reason to have any pride now, no reason to wear the title of "traitor" like some sick badge of honor. All that awaited Priscilla was a lonely drawn out death, and a life lived with no legacy to leave behind. Despite having no need for pride anymore, she firmly believed in what she did, even though it put her where she was now. It was selfish, very selfish, but when it came down to it... she was more than happy to throw humanity aside for the sake of her darling.

But her darling had forsaken her. Her hero had left her behind. Without him, all she wanted was to die.

Priscilla's limbs were weak from the days and nights walking without rest on top of her being malnourished and dehydrated. Her legs grew weaker with every step she took until they eventually gave out and she fell to her knees. Surely death was mere moments away from reaping her soul now – and she couldn't be happier about it. With the last of her strength, she lifted her head up to gaze at the horizon, as she had been marching while staring at the ground for most of her journey. Her green eyes widened in shock and euphoria when she saw a figure in the distance.

A Titan... She thought.

"Hah..." She laughed weakly, "So, this is how it will end after all..."

Priscilla breathed heavily as she watched the giant approach her – it was far from her but she estimated it to be a 15 meter class at the very least. Could very well be taller if it were an abnormal, but if that were the case, why would it be moving so slowly and methodically? As the giant lumbered closer at a painfully slow speed, Priscilla was grew impatient.

"Well?! What are you doing?! Hurry up!" She screamed at it like a woman gone mad, "Eat me already! You big, stupid bastard... Eat me! EAT ME!"

She let out a long animalistic scream as the monster grew closer to her. The sun was almost directly behind it so it's features were completely shadowed, but what did that matter anyway? Death is death, who cares what it looks like when it takes you? She kept screaming until she was red in the face and utterly out of oxygen, leaving her at her lowest and weakest point. With no air left in her lungs, her eyes rolled back and she fell forward onto the ground – unconscious. The Titan was not deterred and kept on it's path towards her body. However, once it was upon her body, it stopped. It did not immediately grab her limp body, break it and crush it between it's teeth. No... it knelt down before her, as if examining Priscilla. After a moment of what could only be called introspection, the Titan carefully grabbed her seemingly lifeless body in it's massive hand and turned around to make it's way back to where it came.

Training in Winter always had it's risks, but mother nature turned out to be a real bitch that season. During their intensive survival training, Priscilla and Reiner had broken off from the rest in their group and were now hopelessly lost in a crippling blizzard. Trying to be a real manly man, Reiner had decided to go after a deer he spotted to try and feed the 104th some much needed meat. However, once the blizzard kicked up, the deer was lost and so were Reiner and Priscilla, as she of course tagged along. Their thick, fluffy coats protected their bodies to the best of their ability, but the cruel winds were unrelenting. Frost strung their faces as it whipped rapidly around, which also made it quite difficult for them to even keep their eyes open. Not that their vision mattered much, the blizzard was so thick that they could barely see three inches in front of their faces. Reiner was leading Priscilla along by the hand, hoping maybe his body could shield her from the punishing winds. The fact of the matter was that the winds were shifting direction at random, so him shielding her wasn't much of a help.

"I can't believe I let you do something so stupid..." Priscilla said between shivers.

"I can't believe I let you come with me to do something so stupid." Reiner retorted without looking back, but still holding onto her hand tightly, "You shouldn't have come with me."

"Well, look at it this way..." Priscilla began, "If we die at least we won't be alone when we do perish."

"We won't die." Reiner spoke, adamant in his resolve, "Not here, not no-"

Reiner's speech was cut off, followed by a startled shout and suddenly his hand released Priscilla's and he disappeared from sight. Priscilla froze in place – if the storm wasn't too harsh on the eyes, they would have shot open in shock.

"R-Reiner?!" She shouted, staring into the blinding whiteness.

"Down..." She heard him call from a short distance somewhere below her, "Steep drop... be careful."

He sounded like he was in pain, which made Priscilla determined to get to him. She got down on all fours and started feeling her way along the ground, eventually coming to the drop he had alerted her of. It wasn't straight down, but sloped, yet as Reiner said it was still quite steep. Without much thought, Priscilla shifted so that was sitting and inched closer to the edge. As carefully as she could she scooted forward and swiftly slid down the slope on her bottom. It didn't take long to reach Reiner's position, and she was careful not to collide with his body.

As Priscilla had expected, Reiner was injured. He was sitting in the snow and clutching one of his legs, groaning in pain. Priscilla panicked and hovered over him to try and get an idea of what was wrong.

"Your leg... is it broken?" She asked with her voice shaking, both from the cold and from fear.

"I think so..." He grunted in response, "I don't think I can walk."

"What?!" She exclaimed.

"Priscilla..." Reiner began, looking towards her and locking eyes, "I'm done for. Go on without me, there's no need for both of us to die out here."

"Are you insane?!" She shouted in response.

Little by little the blizzard actually started to calm, but that didn't matter if Reiner couldn't walk. It could start back up at any moment just as vicious, or it could get even worse than it had been.

"Just go! Get out of here!" He yelled at her in a rage. Priscilla was taken aback as he almost never used such a tone with her.

"No..." She responded defiantly, "I have to do something... I-I'll figure something out!"

She stood up and circled around her hurt companion. The first and only idea that came to her was to hook her arms under his and drag him through the snow. It wasn't ideal, but she had no choice. Priscilla scurried behind Reiner, slipping her arms under his and lifting with all her strength. The clouds that plagued the night were starting to thin as she pulled him along slowly. She groaned softly as she struggled to drag him along, but she could feel her strength wearing thin.

"You can't keep this up!" He shouted at her, "Just leave me here and save yourself!"

In her weakened state, she set Reiner back down flat and collapsed onto her knees. Beneath her coat her chest was heaving up and down due to her frantic and rampant emotional state on top of the physical exertion. By now the winds were calm and the clouds dispersed, allowing the light of the moon to grace the earth below.

I feel... Priscilla thought, looking upwards at the pale orb, Powerful...

The girl's body felt like it was tingling all over as the luminescence that pierced the endless night sky washed over her. Her previous exhaustion and desperate emotions seemed to melt away in mere seconds, replaced with unwavering confidence and strength. She stood up once more, feeling more invigorated than she had their entire journey.

"This is not the end." She declared in a low voice, almost like the growl of a vicious animal.

She grabbed Reiner, completely lifting up his body and swinging him across her shoulders. Reiner was speechless – she was struggling to drag him just moments ago, and now she was bearing the full weight of him on her shoulders. Priscilla took a lumbering step forward with her eyes focused on what was before her, scanning ahead for any sign of shelter. All of her senses felt heightened on top of her burst of strength. She continued to move forward, letting out a grunt with every step she took. She carried him through a thick patch of dead trees, barely feeling any resistance from the inches of snow on the ground. After several minutes of this, she spotted a cliff face in the distance that looked like it had some sort of cave entrance at the base. Her nostrils flared and she set off with even more vigor.

What the hell is this? Reiner thought as he was carried along like a doll.

Using a final burst of strength, Priscilla sped up her pace and hurried into the cave, where she set Reiner down before collapsing face first onto the hard ground. Reiner was able to lift himself into a sitting position and looked down upon his comrade with an equal amount of incredulity and and hint fear. It was like she became something not quite human. Her body shook, but not from the cold, the sheer power she exerted was overwhelming to her and had left her weak again.

"You wanna try explaining that...?" He said slowly. Priscilla raised up her head and torso, supported by her forearms.

"Must have been adrenaline or something." She replied, quite shaken by the experience herself, "And..."

And the power of love.

"And?" Reiner pressed.

"...Nothing." She dismissed as she rose to her feet and quickly changed the subject, "If we're gonna last here through the night though we're gonna need a fire."

Priscilla reached into her coat, shuffling around a bit and pulled out a small knife. It was pretty standard issue for the soldiers to be carrying one at all times. She looked outside the cave entrance and could see those trees that they had traveled through not too far away, perfect for collecting some tinder.

"You're going back out there?!" Reiner exclaimed.

"I have to, we'll freeze if I don't." She replied sternly while keeping her eyes set on the trees, "I won't have to go far... but I need to go now, the wind is already starting to pick back up."

"Priscilla..." Reiner breathed, reaching out with one hand and grabbing onto her pant leg, "You better come back."

"Or what?" She said with a smarmy tone and looking down at him, "You're in no condition to do anything with that leg."

"Hmph..." Reiner grunted. After a moment of holding on, he reluctantly released her pant leg from his firm grip, "Hurry back." He added quietly.

Priscilla nodded at him with a determined look on her face. Without any words, she took off out of the cave in a sprint to try and outrun the returning storm. Reiner watched her as she ran away with worry growing inside of him when he noticed the snow being whipped around by the wind once more. With a defeated sigh, he laid back and stared at the ceiling of the cave. All he could do was wait now and he felt utterly useless for it. It was a feeling he truly hated.

"This isn't what the hero does." He uttered to himself with contempt, "I'm supposed to rescue her..."

Reiner had lost track of time by the time Priscilla returned. It wasn't too long, but the storm was definitely back in full swing when she wandered back into the cave. He sat up as she approached with an arm full of sticks of varying size and chunks of tree bark. Priscilla dropped her spoils onto the ground and knelt down, arranging them in a neat pile and separating some from the main cluster. She then took two decently sized sticks and started roughly rubbing them together in the middle of the tinder pile. The wood wasn't fully dry as it had been battered by snow, but after having come this far, losing hope was not an option. Priscilla scowled while she focused on her work, maybe if she glared at the sticks enough it would cause a quicker reaction. Reiner watched intently as well. Priscilla came to a complete frenzy in her desperation to get the fire started, huffing as she worked. Then, it came, the spark that would get them through the night.

"I did it..." Priscilla said, somewhat amazed in herself.

The rest of the wood began to burn healthily. The second 'pile' she had set to the side was to feed the fire later as it burned through the tinder they had started with. Both Reiner and Priscilla sighed in unison as the fire crackled in front of them.

"Well shit," Reiner said, somewhat amused, "Guess we're gonna make it after all."

"And you wanted me to leave you behind..." Priscilla sneered at him.

"Okay, okay, bad judgment call on my part..." He replied while waving his hands in front of him. He noticed that Priscilla was staring into the fire, like she was avoiding looking at him, "Hey." He added to grab her attention.

"Huh?" She looked up at him.

"You're pretty amazing, you know that?" He asked. His mouth curled into a lovingly sincere smile, an expression he seldom wore. Priscilla's face started to go pink as she returned a sweet smile. She couldn't conjure up any sort of relevant words to reply with, so she thought it best to move on.

"We should rest now." She suggested sternly, crawling around the fire to Reiner's side.

"Not gonna argue with that." He responded and promptly laid back flat. His broken leg wouldn't allow him to lay on his side without making him more uncomfortable and risk damaging it up even more. Priscilla looked a bit concerned though, taking a minute to think before she spoke up again. She worried the fire wouldn't be enough, especially since they'd be sleeping. It could go out at any time and she wouldn't be awake to add more wood to keep it burning.

"Do you remember what they taught us about staying warm in the extreme cold?" Priscilla asked, "Before the first winter we trained in."

"Uhh..." Reiner drawled. Priscilla sighed heavily.

"I assumed it was something you'd remember..."

"Just tell me already." He groaned.

"The best way to stay warm is to strip down completely and then pile our clothing on top of us." She explained, "Skin to skin contact is the ideal way to share body heat."

Without even a moment's pause Reiner broke out into a fit of laughter. Priscilla raised an eyebrow and scowled at him – she was dead serious and he just didn't buy it at all. Of course this wasn't strictly about staying warm, the idea of curling up naked next to him was something that she longed for with every fiber of her being, and now she had the perfect excuse for it.

"You gotta be kidding, you propose we get naked and cuddle up?" He asked once he was able to control his laughs.

"I'm not kidding! This is a proven fact." She explained, "Look, nobody has to know. We'd just be doing everything we can to stay alive out here, nothing weird."

"Nobody has to know? What if I want to brag?" Reiner smugly asked. Priscilla crossed her arms and countered him with her own brand of smugness.

"You can only tell Bertolt." She replied.

Giving in to his simple 'demand' was more than good enough for her. It wasn't exactly a bad or embarrassing situation for her, she was quite satisfied that her suggestion worked. Staying alive was enough of a motivation but her ulterior motive was fueled by her sexual attraction to him. What she didn't know though, was if it would become more than just laying next to each other for warmth. Would if be wise to do such a thing in their present situation? Maybe this could at least open the door for something in the future if nothing happened right then. Regardless, this was a win for both parties involved.