The school was bustling with life, although the actual opening day was more than a week away. People tall and small, young and older were running up and down the corridors and the yards, frustrated and panicking parents, nannies, uncles, and aunts dragged the equal parts frustrated and frightened children behind. One of them cursed inaudibly as they nearly crashed into the red-coated man who suddenly stopped, one hand massaging his temples, looking utterly, terribly lost. She cast a nasty glance at the roadblock before – while dodging two sets of children and a nanny on the verge of a mental breakdown – she decided that her initial target was actually right on the opposite side of the school from where she was.
Dante turned to the boy who was holding onto his father's hand for dear life, afraid that if he let go, he'd be swept up in the current of the bodies.
"So you said your homeroom was…"
"609."
He looked at the piece of paper in his hands that was supposed to tell him the layout of the grounds and buildings. Although he couldn't vouch for the fourth to seventh, this place was definitely harder to navigate than the first three floors of Hell.
"Are you sure?"
"Yes," the boy mumbled. His hands visibly tightened their grip on his father's hand.
"Dante."
The younger twin cast an irritated glance at his brother. "What now?"
"You are holding it upside down."
"Oh." He turned the map around. "Well look at that… That does make more sense."
Vergil scoffed.
"Don't give me that face. When one is used to being surrounded by foreign scripts and demonic scriptures, everything will look like foreign scripts and demonic scriptures. Especially when we are talking about whatever this is."
"Just tell us where we should go."
"Right," he said, squinting at the tiny black numbers, "So we are pretty much on the other side of the building."
"Nicely done."
He could hear the way Vergil rolled his eyes. Even if only internally; his brother would never do something as common as that in public.
Danteeee….
The previous tumult seemingly died down. Only one student still seemed to be wandering around, but as soon as she turned into a room, they were all alone with the faint echoes running through the corridors. Echoes, and the ear-splitting noise of something sharp scratching against metal. Theatrically, Dante threw his hands in the air.
"You give it a try then."
Vergil nodded and held out his hand.
"Let's go," he told his son, turning the boy around. Nero turned to him, puzzled.
"Where is Dante going? I thought we are already late."
"I need to take care of some business. Big boy business. It can't wait."
"There was a bathroom just down the corridor," the kid pointed in the direction where they came from.
"Not that kind of business, but thanks."
From the corner of his eyes, he saw tendrils of shadow creeping towards them from a room that seemingly was left open.
"Come, Nero," Vergil said. His voice made clear that there was no room for protests so like a dutiful son, he followed.
Dante turned towards the empty room. In the darkness he saw the faint outline of a spider, about the size of a Holstein bull, pushing itself through the portal. As it struggled free, the portal proving just a tad undersized for its mass, its flailing legs knocked several chairs and desks over, before finally it fell on the ground with a resonating thud.
"Looks like it's just you and me now, beautiful."
Rearing itself up it turned around, slightly baffled. Four pairs of eyes like beads glared the smiling man straight in the face. It hissed in recognition as the legs finally found their footing and lifted the ungainly body off from the floor.
"Danteeee…"
"The one and only, at your service."
His hands went to his hips and grabbed empty air. Instinctively he reached back, with about the same luck - Rebellion was also missing.
Yes of course, his brain finally registered with a rueful smile, you don't go to registration and orientation days fully armed. Some people might take an offense to that.
He ducked two spear-like limbs and slid under the beast, coming out at the back, already calculating the best course of action.
The underside? Too hard. The face? A good idea, but this particular breed of demon is known to be venomous. Not deadly, not to him at any rate, but still nasty.
The spider did not give him more time to think. With a scream it charged at its opponent, clearly intending to skewer him, or failing that, smash him against the wall.
Using the thing's leg as a pole, he vaulted onto the hairy back and pulled the limb towards himself.
The creature reared, fighting to break free of the unforgiving clasp of his hands. As it was struggling to tear the leg away, an audible, stomach-turning crunch resonated through the corridor.
"Just about time," Dante whispered as he gave it a twist, feeling as the limb gave in, "Do you mind giving me a hand?"
He pushed down on it like a lever and the part came free from its socket. The creature screamed and shook itself to be rid of the unwelcome rider. Purple and green goo oozed freely from the hole.
"I mean, you are all legs, but… Get it?"
The creature lunged at him.
If it believed that it could force its prey to dodge, it was sorely disappointed in what followed.
The spear-like leg entered through the open fangs of its old owner, then came out through the other side, just before the spider's abdomen. It sent a wave of dust flying as it rolled onto its side, long legs twitching their last.
"Sir?"
Dante jumped up like a kid caught red-handed, kicking the slowly disintegrating body behind him with his foot.
"How can I help you?" he asked, quickly blocking the doorway before the owner of the voice could peer inside.
"Uh, actually," the man was probably around twenty-three, with big round glasses, brown hair, his expression strict. He wore a suit that was somewhat long and big on his frame. Probably his first job, desperate to prove himself. "I think this is an area restricted to students and employees?"
"You are absolutely right," he nodded in agreement as he quickly closed the door behind himself, "I just… Had to take care of some urgent business and didn't see the sign."
"If you are looking for a bathroom, there is one right down the corridor. Do you want me to get some extra towels?" he asked, motioning at Dante's jacket.
The whole right arm was covered in purple goo, that used to be the spider's fluids.
"Yep, those might come in handy. Could you maybe also tell me where room 609 is? Also, you should probably call someone to clean. A group of birds flew in."
"Maybe I'll gift you a watch," Vergil whispered to him as the teacher droned on, "Given your atrocious sense of time".
"And if your child has any sensitivities, please mark it on the papers…"
"I had to work with what was given," Dante groaned, looking at the long list of questions, "Next time you fight and I take the kid. Do you think we should put down holy water?"
"Why?"
"Who knows, you didn't seem to like it last time."
"Name one person who likes glass jars blowing up in their faces. Why not put it right next to silver bullet or stake to the heart."
"I'd like to emphasize the importance of routine to their development…"
The mother on their right scrunched her nose as she turned to her partner, a hand over her mouth as she whispered, "What's that smell? I told you to get the sandwich from her coat!"
"I did!" the father protested.
Vergil looked at his brother, one eyebrow raised dangerously high.
"Told you," Dante answered with a shrug of his shoulders, "Had to work with what was given."
While most of the purple and green came off after a good scrubbing with the towels that the young teacher's assistant generously provided, the smell was much more tenacious.
Another good coat, gone, for no reason.
"And that's about it," the teacher finished, "Please return the papers filled out and signed next Monday. Sir?"
"Yeah?"
"I assume you are the other guardian of Nero? Please fill out the contact sheet here."
A few moments later she blurted out, "And I'd like you to know, there is no judgement on my part. I know how hard it can be for people leading alternate lifestyles. Our goal at this school is to make sure that everyone is included and safe…"
Dante stared at her for a moment.
"Sorry, but there seems to be a misunderstanding. I'm the kid's uncle."
Her hands flew to her mouth in shock.
"Oh… Oh. Oh my god. Oh my god," she repeated again and again, as white as the board behind her back, "I'm so sorry, as the application mentioned two guardians, I thought… Oh my god, you are twins, but you just so didn't look alike when you came in..."
"Don't you worry about it," he said with a smile, putting down the pen.
"Uncle Dante?" Nero asked, his head cocked to one side in confusion, "What did Ms. Everheart want? She looks like she saw a ghost…"
"Just keep walking kid," he said, turning the boy's head. "You got the list?"
"Uh-huh, right here."
It was a long list.
The two men groaned in unison. This promised to be a rather expensive shopping trip.
A/N - Don't you worry. Dante paid for the broken chairs and windows.