authorsnote: lets go, lets go.

ahh, I was inspired this week to get this going and damn I am enjoying. will update asap, pls let me know your thoughts.

also check out 'the greatest' on my profile if you like this couple (yeh, yeh shameless plug).

songrecs: bad guy - billie eilish

She manages to avoid him for a week this time.

She doesn't linger after class; she gulps down meals in the Great Hall and then practically runs back to Gryffindor Tower. She avoids the library for goodness sake, and she doesn't even wander the grounds. She is diligent, she even cries off sick (which she has never done before and it makes her feel so guilty), for Potions and does everything she can to avoid him.

Harry and Ron even seem worried about her when she hides away for the 4th night in a row, but she just mumbles 'lady problems' and they back away stumbling, blushing and nodding, which she would find funny if she weren't so shaken.

She doesn't even know this Tom, this boy who marched in and has rattled her so, but she is rattled, she doesn't even know him, and she is shaken.

He makes her doubt herself one second and then builds her up and makes her feel all powerful the next. He trains that smirk on her, forces his intense gaze on her and then treats her with both a callousness and gentle edge at the same time. It is confusing, it is scary, and she has no idea what any of it means.

He is a mystery, and Hermione is usually adept at working out mysteries, at understanding what others can't, and yet she doesn't understand him.

His words ring in her ears as she tries to sleep at night, as she listens to Lavender giggle about Ron (and she can't bring herself to care that her former crush is now sleeping with her dormmate, she isn't sure when her crush on Ron died but it certainly has), and Pavarti coo about Seamus, she hears his words, over and over.

'You're the brightest witch of your generation'

'You could be great'

'Yes, you can'

'That was impressive'

'When you prove you deserve it…'

His praise fills her with warmth, his doubting of her theories and her ideas make her feel cold. When he smirks, she feels hatred, when she saw just one nice smile, she felt like she was on top of the world. When he stole her wand, she wanted to smack him, but when he coaxed her into doing wandless magic, she wanted to hug him. He confuses her so, and it is awful to be so confused, when she is usually so sure of things.

And so, the days pass, it is suddenly 8 days since she has so much as glanced at him, and she feels a little clearer, a little lighter, a little less confused. It feels good (except one nagging part of her that has the audacity to miss him a little which she refuses to listen to).

He messes with her head; it is good to feel clear again.

But then Potions comes, and she knows she can't skip again. She walks in, he's sat at the desk, head bent over a book, and she finds herself actually trembling a little as she approaches him. It is stupid, to feel so intimidated, even a little scared.

Is she scared of him she wonders? Or herself around him?

For she may have avoided him for a week, refused to let her gaze to stray to him, kept her head down and ran from the hall each day, but that doesn't mean that was what she wanted to do.

She wanted to run to him, to ask him to teach her more wandless magic, she wanted to scream at him for beating her at yet another test, she wanted to unpick him, figure him out. She doesn't want to avoid him, but she has to.

He confuses her, messes with her head, he's not good to be around, even if a large part of her wants to be. Hell, she wants to get to know him, but she shouldn't.

He is dangerous.

That she can sense. She is not sure how he is dangerous, but he is. To everyone else he is polite, a gentleman, he is charming. The girls gush and throw themselves at him, the teachers are charmed by him and the Slytherin's practically worship him. Around everyone else he keeps that in place.

But with her? With her he drops it a little, not fully, she isn't arrogant to think she's seen the true side of him, but she thinks she's seen some of it. When he corners her, encourages her, prods her. He is dangerous, she can tell, she is just not sure how.

Her mind back in Potions she finally makes it to the table, sits herself down, pulls out her book and turns to look at him, almost cringing that she'll soon meet his gaze, the gaze she so wants to meet, but equally wants to avoid.

And yet, when she turns to look at him, he isn't looking at her, his gaze is fixed on his book. He ignores her.

And he does for the entire lesson, only slides across some notes on their project, and doesn't say a word. She wants to but can't find what to say. She decides to wait until the end of class, but he sweeps off before she can utter a syllable.

He is gone, and she feels even worse than the week in which she avoided him.

Damn.

The next Potions lesson is the same. She sits down, he ignores her and just passes her his thoughts on their project. This time however she knows she needs to say something.

She shouldn't, she should let it continue like this, this is what she wanted, this is what she should leave it as. She shouldn't talk to him, let him confuse her head with that dangerous smirk and his both flattering and condescending words. She shouldn't.

But of course, she does. For as much as she wants to avoid him, the larger part of her now doesn't want that. He is dangerous, terrifying, and confusing, but he is interesting, smart and there is a thrill with him she's never felt.

So, she does.

"Tom, erm…" Of course, she only manages his name and a hum before he cuts her off.

"Hermione there is no need to talk, I know you don't want to, we can get an O in this project without the need for talking" His voice is more rigid now, harder, it makes her feel cold, far worse than when he smirks or pushes her, this, his indifference is much, much worse.

"I…" She stumbles then, which is awful, she splutters and scoffs, she doesn't stumble, not around anyone but him.

"Really" Again his tone is neutral, polite, but it chills her, she does not like it, not at all. "No need for talk"

Then the class is breaking up, he is packing his bag and about to sweep out again, but she can't let him, she knows she needs to talk to him. She is not sure what she'll say, or why she needs to talk to him. He has given her an easy solution to her resolve to avoid him, and yet now she finds that is the last thing she wants.

When did it change?

When he showed her wandless magic? When she completed it at his urging and felt warmth burst from her chest? When he almost kissed her?

She doesn't know, she just knows it did change. The confusion is back already, a warning sigh, but she ignores it.

And so, she grabs his arm, and she actually see's a hint of surprise on his face, or does she imagine it? She doesn't know, but his neutral expression is straight back in place, and he raises an eyebrow at her as people begin to file out, and somehow, they are left alone again.

"Look" She has never been one to mince words, never delicate or dainty, she knows she is a bit like a bull, storming in, headfirst, as she does so now.

"I know I've been avoiding you" She nods her head then, "I know it is not fair, but … but" She pauses then, for once in her life stumped for words.

"Hermione you don't need to explain…" He begins and she glares, she feels he must be doing this on purpose, making her come to him to explain herself, and yet his expression is polite and neutral, but then she knows how well he can fake that expression.

"No" She shakes her head, "I do" A nod this time, "I know I've been avoiding you, but you rattle me" There, that was the gist of it, "You make me nervous, and confused, something I'm not accustomed to feeling"

"And you dislike this feeling?" He asks, one eyebrow raised, ahh now his polite expression is slipping, the bastard, he's enjoying this, her coming to him cups in hand, she can tell. Thankfully, they are alone now, Professor Calhorn happy to leave his two best students to it, their classmates hurrying to lunch.

"Yes, I dislike feeling on the back foot!" Of course, she does. Rarely in the past does she feel intellectually inferior or confused, but Tom? Tom makes her feel like a bumbling idiot, and that she hates, she hates how he makes her feel in that regard for sure.

But then, there is the reason she's come to him now, the other ways he makes her feel. The way he suggests she might be the smartest person he knows (beside himself), the praise he gives her to hint that she can be so much more than she is now, the confidence he has in her even if he pretends not too in the same sentence. She loves those feelings and hates the others.

Love and hate do walk a fine line it seems.

"Then why are you not avoiding me now?" He asks, eyes full of innocence, she near scoffs at that, if he's innocent then she's no witch.

"Because" She shakes her head again, yes, she can dive in headfirst to make a point, debate an argument or insist something where she is right, but this? Admitting emotions to someone she doesn't know very well? To a boy none the less? This, this is much, much harder.

"Because…" He lets just a hint of arrogance enter his tone then and she glares at him, her skin flushing pink, his lip upturns in something of a smirk, ahh he didn't manage to keep that polite, neutral expression in place … she kind of likes that she made him drop it.

"Because…?" His expression is polite again and she is glaring again, she's tempted to storm off, she can tell he likes this, hell she wouldn't be surprised if he planned this, making her come to him, making her turn tail and run towards him. Bastard.

She shouldn't be doing this, shouldn't, but she is, she doesn't fully know why, but she knows she never wants for Tom to treat her with that cold indifference ever again.

Confuse her, beguile her, tempt her, frustrate her, but use that awful neutrality she knows is under his mask of politeness? That is much, much worse.

"Because I don't want to" There, as direct as she can be. She knows other girls would hint, simper, suggest, but that is not her, has never been her. She has never been able to mince her words and hint at what she wants, she rushes in, it is just the way he is.

Her cheeks are red, will he mock her for being so open? Will he laugh at her attempt? She thinks if he does, she must avoid him from now on, though out of shame, not anger. She drops her gaze to the floor, not able to stand the idea of that condescending expression looking back at her, she can't, won't subject herself to that, and thus, refuses to meet his gaze.

Of course, he doesn't like that, and she is quickly learning that Tom is the kind of man that if he doesn't like something or wants it changed, then he does it. She admires that, she is much the same. She wants better grades? She works for them. She wants to free House Elf's? She'll knit 1000 hats. She suddenly realises she might like Tom and hates the idea of not being around him? She charges in like a bull in a china shop.

He doesn't like that she is looking at her shoes, and so he places a thumb under her chin and forces her gaze up. She doesn't splutter this time, her blush deepens, and she finds herself caught in his gaze, unable to look away now, and he is smirking, this is exactly what he wants, he has her right where he wants … that makes her shiver, both from a little bit of fear, and something else also.

"You don't want to" He spoke slowly, as though she were stupid or something and she glared at him for that. He laughs, and rolled his eyes, taking a step closer to her, invading her personal space, she wants both to shove him away and pull him closer.

It is odd having two waring sensations inside of her – turn away/stay, push him aside/pull him closer, give in to what you want/fight it he's dangerous.

She acknowledges to herself as she tips her gaze further to meet his, that she has never felt this way with another before. Never felt such a riot of butterflies in her stomach, her cheeks heated pink, her hands trembling a little as she toys with the edges of her skirt to stop her from sliding them around his neck. She has never felt like this with anyone, she isn't even sure what it is she is feeling, but it is all new to her.

A day earlier and she'd resolved to never speak to him again, now she is within an inch of him, and she doesn't step back.

"No" She whispers, her tone falling now, for they are in the middle of an empty potion's classroom, their classmates are likely at lunch, and yet even surrounded by potions and school desks, it feels oddly intimate.

"Why?" He probes, she should have known, he'd never let her off with a confession, he'll want more than that, and she looks at his smug expression and knows, that is what he wants, not just her cups in hand, but more, he wants to know why she has come to him as such, he wants her to explain it.

God she hates him, but it is more than that now, it is something else too.

"I don't know" She whispers, and he is rolling his eyes again, his hand moving from her chin to cup her face, to tilt her gaze to him again, his other hand finds her waist, and she feels her heartbeat in her ears, she doesn't move not an inch, but her body leans into him as though not controlled by her.

"There is very little you don't know" Her heart swells at that, there is the opposite. Where there is confusion, butterflies and fear, there is that - the warmth that chases through her at such praise, a warmth she feels when a teacher applauds her work, but more, so much more, "Try again"

"I…" She stumbles and he gives her a look, one of disappointment, oddly it is that look that clears her head, "I want to be near you, I don't know why, or maybe I do" Oh god, now she's babbling, something she often does when nervous, "You're smart, powerful…" Here she goes, "I don't… I'm drawn to you"

She expects a smirk, perhaps something mocking, but this time? This time he leans in, and there it is again, a ghost against her lips, a flutter, and she sighs in something close to wanting and disappointment herself, she wants more than that, much, much more.

Thankfully, this time Tom doesn't disappoint. A ghosting over her lips once, twice, and then his lips are on hers.

A little whimper leaves her lips as his lips crush against hers, as he pulls her forward by her hair, his other hand squeezing her waist. Her hands move from her skirt to find his chest, then around his neck as she'd imagined, then in his hair, twisting and holding onto it. His lips are smooth, and yet rough somehow as well. He bites down on her lower lip before soothing the bite with his tongue and she whines, whines into his mouth, and he chuckles before deepening the kiss.

His tongue seeks entrance to her mouth, and she tentatively meets it with hers. A little growl leaves his lips and a moan hers. He kisses her hard, but she doesn't relent, she kisses back, meets him as best she can, and by what she can feel against her, she doesn't disappoint.

And then his hands are finding her thighs, lifting her up, onto the desk, she parts her legs for him without thinking, and then he is between her legs, his hands are on her thighs, hers are at his chest, and his lips have moved to her neck, to kiss, lick, and then bite.

His hands move up her thighs, drift over the skin there, and she finds her hands balling into fits, clutching his school jumper. She has done nothing more than exchange a few kisses with Viktor in the past and now Tom, nothing more. This is new, and yet so very exciting.

"Tom" She moans, and he moves his lips back to hers, and his hands continue to tease over her skin before travelling further up…

Bang.

The door thuds, and a little shriek of horror leaves her lips. Tom jumps back too before he whispers, 'Disolusio' The air shimmers, and as Professor Calhorn steps inside, muttering to himself about potion modifications, she feels relief he hasn't seen them, Tom cloaked them, and then her cheeks are on fire.

This isn't her! Almost being caught in classrooms! This isn't her at all, and yet as she turns to Tom, as she see's the redness on his lips, how is normally perfectly groomed hair is a mess, as she realises the effect on him, for a moment she is glad this has been her. And she grins, she grins, and he shakes his head at her, that insufferable smirk back in place. 'Muffalito' She is too distracted to question how he knows that spell in the moment.

He takes her hand, helps her hop down from the desk, and then they head outside, he cancels both spells once they are free and clear. He is so capable, she can see that, she feels thankful he stopped them getting caught, her reputation is perfect, she prefers it stays that way.

She is blushing something fierce now she knows, she feels embarrassed and yet there is a thrill in her that wasn't there before.

"I better go and erm freshen up" She imagines the way he looks she probably looks worse, and he nods. She does too, not sure what happens here, when he says nothing, she feels a little disappointment and moves to turn away. She doesn't know how to play this, but he hasn't said anything, and so she turns.

But then his hand is at her waist, and he is whispering in her ear, "Meet me tonight, Astronomy Tower, at 12" He is close enough that she just nods and he feels it, and then he turns and is sweeping away, as the bell rings for lunch ends, and she turns and hurries to Gryffindor Tower. She doesn't need Harry or Ron seeing her like this.

She does glance over her shoulder just the once, and he is gone.

She hurries to her room then and arrives in front of the mirror. Her curls are a mess, her cheeks flushed, lips swollen, knee socks one rolled down to the ankle the other turned the wrong way, and her tie is askew, one button on her shirt undone. She is utterly unsettled, inside and out, and yet as she should be straightening up, worrying, perhaps hurrying to her next lesson? She does none of those things.

Instead she flops on her bed and laughs.

sooo thoughts?

please review/follow/fav, and I hope you enjoyed!

also, yes there is a huge twist in this story, no, no one has guessed it yet, and no, you won't find out for a little while.

speak soon