It's reasonable to assume that the Krusty Krab was a packed house at this point, as all the seats were occupied by interspecies sea creatures vying over free food. Frankly, It almost appeared as if they were fabricating their relationship, similar to what SpongeBob and Patrick had plotted, with Bubble Bass courting Plankton and Larry the Lobster hooking up with King Neptune himself. However, one can't be so certain if they're serious or not. Perhaps they do love each other, which isn't always a negative thing.
After a while, SpongeBob and Patrick entered, their hands clasped snugly together. SpongeBob effeminately strutting his cubic ass like the little f-slur he is. As they took their first step on the wooden deck of the eatery, in a sudden descend that nearly stopped SpongeBob and company's hearts, plummeted down a banner from the ceiling.
"Triton's Girthy Trident!" SpongeBob in surprise cursed, docking his head.
Despite being obviously visible in their panic mode, the bestfriends were simply met with applause from the rest of the customers.
"Why are they celebrating, SpongeBob?" asked Patrick who was clasping his chest from his near heart attack.
"Look up, Patrick!" Replied the sponge whilst pointing at the banner, "Combat your dyslexia for once and read!"
Written immaturely with bold paint, the hanging fabric display the writings: One millionth Couple.
"Oh my Lord! we actually achieved something!" Leapt together the two neighbors, hands held as they sang.
In the midst of their joy, Mr. Krabs came to greet them. Turns out he actually survived the gun wound. All it took was a few stitches and some anti-biotics. "Congrats to the both of ya'll... you just won a free krabby patty!"
Much like a couple of barnacle heads, it took SpongeBob and Patrick minutes to notice what a scam the price was, given that the reason they arrived in the first place was for the free food.
"Wait a minute, what kind of bullshittery is this?" questioned Patrick in his fit of nearing rage, "What's the point of this? everybody here get the freebies!"
"Yeah well... You two get yours with 20% salt added" said Eugene as he scratched his head.
That offer appeared to be reasonable to the disgruntled customers, and with that... they calmed down.
"Thank you, I guess..." SpongeBob shrugged.
Krabs further reinforced his point by reaching into his joggers and retrieving two krabby patties that had been stashed within, seeping with sweat after hours of incubating beneath his salty exoskeleton'd ballsack.
"Here you go, two sodium patties for both of ya'll"
However, before SpongeBob and Patrick could claim their reward, a blasting noise stopped the exchange as the door burst open. Following it was Squidward and Sandy making a dogmatic entrance shortly after.
"NOT SO FAST" Squidward announced, "These two are frauds! They're not even in a relationship! I'm afraid they would have to forfeit those special patties to us!"
Patrick was not about to let his accomplishment be stripped away from him. To him, this unexpected prize was to make up for all the time he had spent the entire morning pondering ways to appear gay. He challenged Squidward for he needed to assure that their relationship wasn't a bluff - even though it actually is.
"How wrong you are, Squid!" Patrick crossed his arms. Sweat trickled down his eye, "We're official! Right SpongeBob!?"
"Damn right we are!"
"Oh really?" Squidward countered a wry smirk. He can sense their nervousness on their faces, that they are striving to conceal. "Prove it then!"
Patrick and SpongeBob exchanged determined glances. They were keen about proving the grumpy octopus incorrect. Even if it meant sacrificing their dignity.
"Are you ready to rock today, Patrick!?" SpongeBob pepped talked.
"Yeah! I'm ready to rock!" vocalized Patrick in retribution.
"Are you ready to get crazy!?"
"I'm already hearing voices!"
That was the last glint of heterosexuality witnessed from SpongeBob and Patrick, as the men ditched them completely by sucking faces.
It was Patrick's tongue that initiated the French kiss. The chubby star shoved it down SpongeBob's throat, clearing every presence of tonsil stones that had amassed inside the esophagus, efficiently as an 1800s chimney sweeper per se. The bumpy tongue collected those putrid pebbles and, Patrick would let them dissolve on it like cough drops.
"Thank you for the pop rocks, SpongeBob" moaned the starfish into SpongeBob's mouth, fogging up fresh plumes and plumes of foul mouth farts inside.
SpongeBob simply responded with a groan. He was whisked away from the pleasures supplied, thus the stench had little effect on him. He pulls away from Pat's lips and lets out a loud womanly moan, his anus opening in sync with the cry, creating the illusion as if it mouthed the wail.
The rapture didn't drew SpongeBob back to the sea star's lips. Instead, it spurred him to fixate on the black dry skin fat guys have on the back of their neck, sucking it fervorous until a thick scab of grime was fully suctioned off the nape, leaving a dot of light hickey.
"Ohh... Pat! I can tell you didn't shower for months!" he said, wincing from the salty aftertaste. "This neck flake is drier than expired kelp cereals"
But even this merely added to the tension. SpongeBob continued to devour more of Patrick's physique, trailing his active tongue along the star's clavicle and nibbling on them like pork ribs, which felt so exquisite it fired the cinders of Patrick's lust.
Patrick's breasts were the next item on the agenda. SpongeBob parted his lips, the most widest he's ever done, just so a single chest patty can fit inside.
The pleasure captured a grunt out of Patrick. Radish red his obese nipples became as the sponge's mouth clasped him clipped.
The SquarePants' mouth clutched the solid bubble of fat and took a peckish bite out of that bullet-stiff breast nib.
"OWUU!" yelled out Patrick. He flinched his cock hard in response to the unexpected stab and shot pre-cum in his pants like an archerfish.
"Oh Neptune! I stained my undies..." The fat starfish bellowed, "That attracts bad omens... I must remove them this instant!"
With little to no delay, Patrick disrobed his pants and unbounded his rich, rotund penis. It looked like his head.
"Now that's what I call a chode!" glamoured the yellow sponge.
Enticed, SpongeBob sang, "I know of a place where you'd ram that dick hard! a magical place with magical charm!~"
"Where?" asked Patrick.
"Indoors!" SpongeBob bent over and showed the bulge of his puffy asshole through his pants.
Patrick comprehended the situation and used his abnormal strength to rip SpongeBob's pants in half. The star afterwards was introduced to his friend's yellow buttchecks.
"Don't just stand there wallowing, Pat!" SpongeBob impatiently demanded, "Put it in already!"
"Uhhh..." nervous sweat streams ran on Patrick's face, "Which one?!"
The confused starfish was at the presence of multiple holes populating SpongeBob's cubed buttocks. He wasn't sure which one is which.
"Just pick any!" SpongeBob yelled, slamming his fist on the ground. He couldn't take the teasing any longer. "They all serve the same purpose!"
Patrick had to make sure. So, he gave SquarePants dual prostate exams by inserting both his fists into two different supposed assholes, and Boy! SpongeBob wasn't kidding. Both pits smelled dead as a rat's carcass.
"These are assholes alright!" confirmed Patrick, cleaning his hands with his tongue. Given authority, Patrick slammed his big pink oozer deep inside SpongeBob's claustrophobic poo lagoon.
"SpongeBob? What's claustrophobic mean?" Patrick stupidly halted his fucking.
"It means my ass is afraid of Santa Claus..."
"As it should!" Pat enlightened. He then continued his unfinished insertion, pushing the remaining inches of his thick penile until it left SpongeBob's anus stretched wide as a vase sponge's brim.
"indoors... Indoors! IIIINDOOORRS!" moaned the sea sponge. His ass absorbing Patrick's erectile blows like he's sort of made of spongy material.
As for Patrick though, he was struggling to thrust since his friend was so bear trap tight. It didn't help much that they literally live underwater - naturally that should've lubed them up and do the trick. Although, Patrick wasn't one that should be underestimated. He knew just how to wet his dick drives.
"Are you aware of how starfishes eat, SpongeBob?"
Patrick soon after demonstrates this biological science as he extends his bile laden stomach out of his mouth, all tube-like and slithery. After that, he punctured it inside SpongeBob's other neighboring butthole, releasing gastric acids in order to burn SpongeBob's insides into chowder mush.
"Sweet merciful Neptune!" SpongeBob emitted his nonplussed emotions, "This looked way kinkier when it was shown on Nat Geo"
The pineapple resident can feel every organ of his, melting. All protein of his inner flesh, broken down into liquified brewed necrosis by feral digestive enzymes. Some have already leaked out of his holes bubbly like soap suds, the remnants of his evaporated prostate.
Delighted, Patrick can now fuck slippery with pus slathered on his weenie hut Jr. He thrusted down down down to the bottom of the sea, where SpongeBob shits and shove his snail Gary. Not shy of doing the loop de loop and pull on the sponge's stove pipe. Over and back, left to right his pinhead wandered until the chute's all looking full - also gaped.
As one might expect, the starfish felt his star-spangled orgasm coming. "Ugh! SpongeBob, I t-t-think I'm going to wumbo!"
"Alright!" SpongeBob remarks, "Ravioli Ravioli give me the Cumiolli!" and Patrick nuts.
SpongeBob felt the tsunami of Pat's tar flooding his dirty den. Extreme amount of soaking tartar sauce inflated him as Patrick served his patties full with unlimited mayo.
After he finished, Patrick pulled his romance lance out, yanking along SpongeBob's rectum that it bloomed out like sea anemone - which is just a fancier way of saying "Prolapsed"
Laying exhausted, Patrick took his time to rest - doing yoga breathing exercises.