Hello and welcome!

I've managed to write another chapter in a week! I'm totally doing a happy dance right now xD

On the other note, this story has officially gotten its beta:

The amazing Sassifrass who has helped me out with this chapter!

OCs appearing in this chapter:

Kobashigawa Hinagiku

Kida Rini

Matsushita Koichi (mentioned)

Tsutsui Tomoka

I hope that you enjoy this quote as much as I did:

"If you hear a voice within you say 'you cannot paint,' then by all means paint, and that voice will be silenced."

-Vincent Van Gogh

Chapter 13: Tournament III: Face

It is dark.

Dark and damp. Full of panic. Full of rain. Full of trembles. She fears. She fears a lot. She fears herself. She fears her betters. She fears failure. She fears disgrace. She fears so much.

She doesn't fear pain. She never feared pain. She never feared death.

I fear it for her.

I fear a little. In this darkness, I've known only safety. She hasn't. Perhaps, she is protecting me in this darkness of hers. Perhaps. And perhaps, I'm protecting her, of this fear of mine. Perhaps.

It is leaking everywhere. It is raining in my dark. She is trembling.

She caresses me. And then, it stops. The sounds of rain patter. The sounds of shouting.

Finally, she is steady.

I'll be strong for you. I'll surpass my fear for you. I'll never retreat if you so desire. I'll never know defeat with you.

You won't lose.

You won't die.

We don't lose.

Draw me.

Use me.

Fight.

The second day of the Tournament came a bit too soon for Hinagiku. It was Kida Rini, her new roommate and superior officer that woke the exhausted Shinigami up and directed her towards the baths for a much-needed wake-up shower.

"And you need to make sure that-"

"You've already told me that, Hinagiku." Rini interrupted her, bending her head back and rinsing out her short, red hair. She shook it out next, sending drops of cool water everywhere. "Three times." Commented the 15th Seat. When she was met with silence, except the rowdy splashing of the men's bath next-door, she glanced at her friend. Hinagiku was sitting in her towel, looking at the soap in thought. Her dark hair, naturally wavy, still had its usual curl, even with all the water in it.

"Sorry." Mumbled the distracted Shinigami in a tiny voice.

"Are you scared?" Asked Rini, making Hinagiku look up at her. The girl had a slight blush on her face, and the redhead wasn't sure if that was from the heat or from the embarrassment of seeing her superior in only a towel. "Or nervous?"

Hinagiku looked back down, thinking of the fights that would occur that day. Unseated officers separated into blocks A, B, C and D would duel it out in the arena. She had been sorted into block A. She would be fighting today. She would be fighting first. She would have another chance to earn herself a spot as a Seated officer. She would be able to prove herself. Show that she wasn't just a Paper Pusher. Show that she was worthy of the Kobashigawa name.

"Excited?" Rini's voice made her blink. She'd forgotten that her friend was still there.

"Terrified." Answered Hinagiku, her accent showing. "An' delighted." She smiled at Rini, showing the other woman her shaking hands. They hadn't stopped trembling since she'd woken up. And, she knew that they wouldn't stop trembling until she entered that arena and grabbed the hilt of her Asauchi, ready to strike.

"Make us proud, Hina."

The morning was a blur. They'd set up the new arena easily enough, as the 12th Division had sent over some of their officers to help. Surprisingly enough, the 11th Division members hadn't caused a brawl yet. Everyone seemed to be expecting the two huge fights that would happen that day. The tension in the air was overwhelming.

Around six in the morning, a light rain had begun. The whole skies had turned gray, a dull, uninteresting color, making the working Shinigami look rather eerie. It was still warm, but somehow… suspenseful. Hinagiku dressed in silence in her rooms, free of any duties except a small amount of management for the day. And it was a good thing, too, as her mind had gone in a numb, dream-like state at one point.

The room which she shared with Rini were empty, as the Seated officer had left some time ago, the only sound the rain drops falling from the roof outside, once they collected in the sewer system. But, Hinagiku could hear a dozen flies in her ears, buzzing, making her head feel large, making her feel like she was going to puke at any second. Her hands dressed her on autopilot, and it was while her numb and shaky fingers were pulling on her socks and tying her waraji that she realized that it was time.

She was ready.

Doing a couple calculations in her head and going through her mental calendar, she could tell that she had one more hour until the signing in began. Hinagiku grabbed her Asauchi and tied it to her waist, where it always hung. She was, after all, in the 11th Division. Even if the Shinigami weren't required to carry their weapons at all times, unless an emergency was declared, the Zaraki Kenpachi Squad members almost always had their katana with them.

The traditional paper doors closed behind her silently and the slight girl looked at the skies, taking in the rhythmic falling of the water drops from the edge of the roof. She felt the weight of her body suddenly, her knees shaking, her breath becoming ragged. She was going to do this. She could do this. She would do this.

Hinagiku closed her eyes, breathing in with the rain. One. Two. Three. Breathe. One. Two. Three. Breathe. She counted the drops hitting the hardwood patio right in front of her. She couldn't see them, yet, she felt every single vibration. One. Two. Three. Slice.

If anyone had looked, they would've simply seen the fourth drop split in half, before flying left and right, not reaching the wood that would've been its destination. Hinagiku opened her eyes, taking in a deep breath. She felt her fingers tremble as they caressed the tsuka of her Asauchi, decorated in pale, lavender daisies.

I'm ready.

She spent the morning going around and taking care of small tasks, like managing the stalls' supply lists and taking care of minor technical adjustments. It was almost an hour after the signing in had begun for the Tournament that day that Rini found her and dragged her by the hand to the long line of tables, making her stand in line and submit her papers.

Hinagiku read through the instructions and agreement which she had written with Koichi's help in a numb state. It seemed ages ago that they had been sitting in the 4th Seat's office, tossing ideas about what should and shouldn't be allowed at which level of the Tournament. But, she knew well that it had been a mere couple of weeks ago. Just eighteen days. Only four hundred and thirty-two hours. Just. Only. Time sure flies quickly.

"Have you signed it yet?" Rini had come back to the line, her bright red hair now pulled in a tiny ponytail at the nape of her neck. Hinagiku looked at the new side of her recently acquired friend, friend mind you, and gave a small smile.

"That hairstyle suits you, Rini-dono." She complimented, causing the other officer to snort.

"Yeah, yeah. It's convenient." She replied off-handedly. After all, Rini had never been known for her beauty in their Division. No, she'd been known for her fearless strength and grit in battle. Beauty was not a word one associated with her. Though, from a purely objective point, Hinagiku could see that a little bit of makeup would've done wonders for the 15th Seat. Clearly, she'd learned a thing or two from following Tomoka at the Academy. "Now, stop deflecting. Have you signed it yet?"

"Here." Hinagiku swirled her signature on the bottom of the paper, agreeing that she was responsible for her own life, her injuries and her own behavior during the match. She had agreed not to release her Zanpakutō, as if she could, use excessive force on a downed Division member, as if she would, or attack outside of the battle arena, as if she should.

"To the tables, go on." Rini urged her, pushing her towards one of the officers sitting at the sign-in desk. Hinagiku knew his face, yet she couldn't place his name. She'd undoubtedly written it some time, but her memory had gone foggy. Perhaps I'm nervous. She told herself, trying to access any other information that she was sure she had in her brain. Nothing came up. She was blank.

"Name and position, please." He asked her politely, taking the signed consent paper from her hands. Yesterday, she'd been behind these desks. Yesterday, she'd been encouraging young Academy graduates not to be afraid. Suddenly, she realized why they'd looked at her with those vacant, terrified looks and she felt guilt deep inside of her stomach, stirring.

"Kobashigawa Hinagiku, Filing and Documentation." She recited on autopilot. There were numerous positions in the unseated department, after all. And, none of the members of the 11th Division quite enjoyed being assigned to the Filing and Documentation sector.

Headed by their 7th Seat, who was quite lazy in the signing and filing department, and had atrocious sense of organization if you asked Hinagiku, the F an' D sector was mostly in charge of writing reports, taking care of paperwork, assigning missions and tidying up the filing rooms at the Division. They were as close as one got to the 4th Division in any Squad, if you asked an officer. Their missions were far and few in between and the members submitted complaints about their placement to their own superior officers constantly, which led to a bad working environment. It's safe to say that nobody needed to explain the popular 11th Division nickname of the sector to the newcomers.

"The Failure and Desperation Squad? Are you sure that you want to be fighting today, miss?" Asked the officer, looking her up and down. Hinagiku nodded once, biting the inside of her lip to stop herself from talking back. A lady must never talk back. A lady will remain polite and proper, even in the direst of situations. She'd been drilled well with those rules, after all. "Alright, then, miss. Could you repeat your name, please?" Asked the man, seeing that she was quite determined to fight.

"Kobashigawa. Hinagiku, like the flower." The petite Shinigami recited on autopilot, as she'd done numerous times in the Academy and during her years of service. It was comforting, having to explain how her name was written. Compared to the Kobashigawa estate, where everyone knew her name perfectly well. Compared to all the fancy outings which her Grandmother had made sure she attended in a proper, ladylike manner, where her last name was usually followed by a gasp. After all, if you were a noble unfamiliar with Kobashigawa Setsuko, you were a failed noble. It wasn't the wealth, nor the power that made the woman fearsome. No, it was her merciless determination to reach the top. To be the best. Hinagiku knew that all too well.

"Alright, Kobashigawa-san." Said the officer, looking up at her from the papers he'd filled out and filed into the 'complete' box below the desk. "If you're ready, the Tournament will proceed in just thirty minutes. You should be at the entrance to the arena by then, ready. Your door is C2." He informed her, placing a small map and card with her name, picture and position on the tabletop.

"Thank you very much." Replied the girl, taking the offered items, even if she didn't need the map.

"Good luck." Told her the officer with a sad look in his eyes. Hinagiku couldn't help but bite the inside of her mouth once more. Her Grandmother had sent her off with that look. It was all those years ago, when she'd been entering the Shin'o Academy that her only living relative had given her that face. Like she was being pitied. That didn't stop her Grandmother from having a shouting match with her granddaughter, though. Every time Hinagiku came to the estate from school, there would be snide comments about her choice of profession waiting for her. That, of course, would escalate over the course of days that the girl spent with her guardian. Those days had turned to hours later. Then minutes. And now, only angry letters. In the end, her Grandmother only sent her notes of utmost formality. There was no more yelling. No more sadness. Only disappointment.

Hinagiku supposed that it was for the best, though. Her Grandmother would never agree with her becoming an officer and she would never give up her life as a Shinigami. Besides, the girl had never been good at replying to her guardian. She would usually sit there, in silence, listening to the angry tirade, before her Grandmother left. Then, she would cry or just sit, staring into the distance, her tears all dried up.

"Ahhh! Hina-chan!" Hinagiku jumped a bit at the nickname, whipping her head about. "All done and revved up?" Asked Koichi, grinning at her. He looked more than excited, even if he wouldn't be participating in the match.

"Y-yes." Replied the stunned Shinigami, a different smile flashing through her mind. Hideki. She blinked, and Koichi's smile was a crooked, cheeky grin once again. His proud lady-killer and definitely not the sweet smile that he usually offered.

"Good, good." Nodded the officer. "I won't be cheering, you know, because I'm commentating. But, just so you know, I'm definitely rooting for you to be in the top twenty!" He talked while walking towards one of the entrances to the arena quickly. "Now, get going!"

Hinagiku didn't even have the time to thank her superior for his support and trust, as she was quickly absorbed into a shuffling crowd of officers, all eager to enter the arena. Her card was checked quickly at the entrance, and then the young Shinigami set out to find her gate, all the way on the other end of the arena, as Koichi had pushed her through the entrance A.

She arrived at C2 with a thin sheet of sweat covering her forehead, making her bangs stick to the damp skin from the heat of the day and the number of bodies pushing about below the bleachers. Standing with the other eleven participants for her gate, Hinagiku got the nervous shakes once more. Her hand trembled and her heart pumped in her chest like a terrified bird, trying to fly away.

It seemed like seconds had passed before Koichi's booming voice sounded from the direction of the closed door, welcoming their judges, Captain Sōsuke Aizen, Captain Suì Fēng and Lieutenant Izuru Kira. Apparently, Captain Ichimaru had decided to pull a 'Kuchiki' as the operations team had begun calling it. Hinagiku felt her stomach turn and bile rise up her throat. She could feel herself becoming as pale as a sheet. Looking around, the Half of the officers around her had a similar reaction. One had even hurled on the side of the corridor. The other half, though... They were grinning. They were excited. They were eager. After all, they were the Kenpachi Zaraki Squad.

Hinagiku closed her eyes and took a deep, shaky breath, grasping the hilt of her Asauchi with trembling, freezing fingers. She opened her eyes once more, narrowing them in determination. She was no longer a Kobashigawa. She was no longer a lady. She was no longer an orphan. She was no longer alone. She was a member of the Kenpachi Zaraki Squad. And she would prove it today.

The door opened, the light of the day blinding her for a mere second, before she saw the arena. Even if she had designed it and helped the 12th Division plan it, it was a whole other thing seeing it in person. The area seemed huge from below, a giant platform, surrounded by water, six paths leading from different gates to the middle.

"Now, ladies and gentlemen, Captains and Lieutenants! This is our arena for today." Came Koichi's booming voice over the speakers. "With an impressive size of blah blah, holding an amazing blah blah gallons of water, this will be the sight of the today's two battles." Hinagiku jumped a bit, realizing that the battle had begun already. Her gate mates were running forward, gripping their swords tightly, some of them moving skilfully with Shunpo and others just charging in.

Hinagiku gripped her Asauchi, grit her teeth and flew forward as well.

Kida Rini, the 15th Seat of the 11th Division, under direct command of Ikkaku Madarame was one of the last Shinigami to eagerly rush up the bleacher steps, excited to watch the incoming match. You have to ask yourselves, why in the world would a person from the 11th Division be one of the last people to hurry to see the fight? Usually, it was the 11th Division that was the first on the scene, ready to join any brawl and make it rowdier. If they weren't there managing the fight, they were certainly there starting it.

Yet, here we have Kida Rini, with her short, bright red hair bound in a tiny ponytail, running up the steps, almost last. Well, you see, Kida Rini is not what one would call a very organized person. In fact, her side of the small officers' quarters which she shared with Kobashigawa Hinagiku, feel free to read neat freak, was a complete mess and often forced her roommate to go on a cleaning spree. This said something, as they had only been roommates for a few months.

It had taken a lot out of Rini to let go of her friend and colleague, Hinagiku, as the girl was a participant in today's fights, and attempt to organize most of the event herself. True, Matsushita Koichi did help. Well, as much as someone like him can. It had taken her all morning to convince the 12th Division 3rd Seat, Akon, to lend them some of their Squad's manpower for managing and organizational purposes. Suddenly, that morning at around 6am, Rini had realized why Hinagiku had asked for some fifty or so Academy volunteers. When all of the two hundred officers are scheduled to fight that day or the next, none of them are really eager to do any work.

Rini jumped down a couple of steps, hurrying to one of the empty spots of the top seats in the bleachers. After sitting down and listening to Koichi's booming voice commenting on Yamamoto-soutaicho's presence, which earned him a death glare from the aforementioned man, the 15th Seat let out an annoyed sound and jumped up once again, realizing that her view was terrible. She rushed down the steps further, until she found herself somewhere in the middle. By then, their 7th Seat was announcing the favored winners of today's A block match, a list of last names and their specialties in battle. Rini would be dishonest if she told you that she wasn't annoyed at all by the fact that her friend's name hadn't been mentioned.

She plopped down into another uncomfortable seat, wiping some sweat off of her brow. Despite the light rain in the morning, the day was heating up and she'd been using her Shunpo to get around the camp for a few hours already. Rini looked down at the arena, watching as men and women alike spilled from the gates and towards each other on the blow of the whistle. She looked for a small, black haired figure with a colorful scarf, but couldn't find her.

"What is that idiot doing?" Murmured the Seated officer, her elbows resting on her knees, as she bent forward and bit the nail of her thumb nervously. "Don't tell me she chickened out." She growled to herself, remembering all the hours that she'd put into Hinagiku's workouts. After all, the petite girl had come to her some weeks ago with a peculiar fire in her eyes, begging the superior officer to teach her how to use her Shunpo better in battle. And how could one resist a fight in the 11th Division? Rini had welcomed the challenge.

Finally, from the gate on the opposite side, ran out a small form, the colorful scarf whipping about her neck, her hand gripping her Asauchi tightly. Rini smirked, straightening and leaning back into her seat. She watched as the figure, clearly Hinagiku, tripped on nothing in particular, falling flat on her face just before she reached the main brawl, which was well on its way to carnage by then.

"That idiot!" Rini exclaimed, closing her eyes, her hand coming up to slap her forehead.

"I believe that she is just nervous." Called out a voice next to her, causing the officer to look up with a glare. There weren't many people who addressed her as freely as that. She took in the girl standing beside her seat, in the walkway. She was petite, yet, filled out, with an immaculately clean shihakushō and perfectly combed hair. Her skin was pale and her face had a tiny amount of makeup, accenting her noble features. "That's just like Hina-chan, don't you think?~" Smiled the unfamiliar girl at her, clearly not reading the atmosphere. Rini glanced back down to see her friend picking herself up and rubbing her knees.

"No… Not really." She replied to the meddlesome girl with irritation. "Hinagiku isn't clumsy." Rini practically growled out.

"Oh, I meant no offense." Said the girl back, still smiling serenely. "I understand that you've recently become acquaintances? I've known Hina-chan for ages!~ It's only natural that I know her better." The Shinigami nodded slightly to Rini and then sat down, perfectly, her legs crossed at her ankles, pulled underneath her seat. Rini suddenly felt very self-conscious, as her legs were long, much longer than this girl's, sprawled out in a convenient and rather boyish style.

"Whatever." She replied, turning back to the match just in time to see Hinagiku rush into the crowd. Though, Rini did pull her legs under her chair then, gritting her teeth.

Her knees stung.

Hinagiku righted herself, brushing off the small amount of dirt from her shihakushō and she pushed her hair back from her face. A stray Kidō flew her way and she ducked to avoid the ray of blue lightning. The forty-something officers in front of her were brawling like nobody's business and Hinagiku was strangely reminded of female servants at her Grandmother's estate, each battling for the right to dress the Lady of the House. With a small sigh, she gave a smile, her body instantly relaxing at the image. She went even further, seeing the men in decorated and embroidered silk kimonos, with obi colors signifying their position and duties, just as the women would wear. Then, with a small, completely relaxed laugh, Hinagiku grasped the hilt of her Asauchi.

Just as she was about to run forward again a single drop of cool water landed on her cheekbone, slowly sliding down her face. She looked up, seeing the clouds gathering and moved to the right, just in time to avoid a stray Bakudō spell. Then, still looking up, Hinagiku closed her eyes.

One. Two. Three. Breathe. Step. A drop landed on her cheek once more, sliding down and another landed on her hand at the hilt of her Asauchi an instant later. She stepped forward. Look without eyes. The faint, comforting smell of lavender wafted to her nose and she could see, even in the darkness the pale purple smoke rising from her on body. From her hands, from her feet and from her Asauchi. It sparkled and swirled in on itself around her.

The next drop that fell towards her hand from the skies never hit the ground. It was sliced in two, the almost invisible motion of the katana sending the halves flying left and right. And Hinagiku walked forwards once more, without a rush in her step, her breathing calm, her head empty, her stomach settled and her eyes closed.

She didn't need to feel nervous. This was just a fight. And fighting is what she'd spent minutes and hours and days and weeks and months and years and decades perfecting. She was a Shinigami. Even more, she was a Shinigami of the 11th Division. She was a part of the Zaraki Kenpachi Squad. She knew their motto well.

Fight strong. Have no fear. Never retreat. Never be defeated.

You lose you die.

You die you lose.

I won't lose.

I won't die.

I'm in the Zaraki Kenpachi Squad.

We don't lose.

Not many people saw the tiny Shinigami enter the brawl, her eyes closed and her hand steady on her Asauchi, as Koichi was a bit too busy commenting one of the favored members of Ikkaku's section, who'd been apparently predicted to become a Seated Officer. Not that it mattered to Hinagiku, really. She was in a world of her own. In a slow, motionless world of information. There was no sound. No gravity. There was only her, her mind and her sword.

And she knew all of these men like the back of her hand.

Her sword sung.

That's all folks!

Please don't kill me for not revealing Hina's Zanpakutō yet! She just isn't ready for it…

A question for my lovely readers:

Would you enjoy some spin-off one shots? As I do have a couple of ideas that I can't really fit in the timeline...

Onto the reviews:

Silentprotector:

I'm so happy to see your name in the reviews again! I'm glad that you're still enjoying the story :D

d0wn-t0-mars:

Still alive and kicking-datebayo :P Shamelessly referencing other anime as well hahahhahahah

Blacktiger93:

Thank you for the lovely review! I hope that this chapter didn't disappoint?

mayalewis16:

Hmmmm not promising too much ass kicking any time soon, but, yeah, Hina's definitely changing :D I can't resist writing some character development, after all xD

TheEccentric1:

Cheers! I'm still alive and kicking and attempting to go back to the usual writing schedule xD Too bad that I'm terribly overworked as it is ahhahahahha (this is some self-pitying laughter, though…)
Anyways! Thank you for a lovely long review! My favorite kind!
Short chapter? It's the same length as always? _ I do 4k words every time like a good girl :P
On the topic of Hina: she's definitely going through some character development. I love writing that part of the story, after all :D So, she will come out of her shell more and more during the next chapters :D
As for Tōshirō, I'm so happy that you enjoy the angle which I took with him! I agree that most authors focus on romance, rather than development of the pre-romantic relationship. Perhaps it's just my view of romance that is messed up? I mean, so many of my friends got together with people only to break up with them once they realized that they didn't, in fact, even like that person… It's all a little sad… So, taking all things regarding Hina and Tōshirō into consideration (I see them both as a bit old fashioned), they aren't really comfortable with playing fast and loose with romance in my mind. So, I'm going for a friendship first – relationship later kind of connection, if that makes sense? I do promise awkwardness along the way! :P
As for Tōshirō's reaction when he woke up…. I will attempt and grant this wish!
Break? What's that? (I'm one of those Sparta kind of people who just keep going until they drop dead ahhahahahhaha)

Girl-luvs-manga:

I promise that she won't be when it matters!

Cute-but-psycho824:

Thank you for the review I'm glad that you liked the last chapter! Hopefully, you enjoyed this one as well :D What made you think that Hina would do something bad?

Blob80:

Of course! I love all of my reviewers :D You keep me writing xD
I feel you about the college… What's your major? Novel? Novel! I'm excited! You must give me a title! I'm glad that you're taking the time to read and review my fic! I greatly appreciate it (blushing in the corner due to terrible issues with self-esteem).

Hmmmm on the topic of Hina's jealousy… It's not so much as a 'he's mine back of' in a romantic sense, but more in a 'I really enjoy that Captain's attention' kind of a feeling? I mean, he is a high ranked officer, a prodigy and a handsome man at that, and he paid some attention to her over Tomoka (who is a noblewoman of a high status and usually gets everything and anything on a silver platter). This was more Hinagiku not wanting to lose something to Tomoka, like she's used to. She's a pretty passive person (taught by her Grandmother to be) and her feelings are usually 'dulled' by the way she pulls back. She has repressed this 'inferiority complex' that she'd got with Tomoka for a long time. Now, it just showed just because she enjoys Tōshirō's company and attention a lot and doesn't want to 'lose' him to Tomoka as well. Does this make sense or am I just rambling?

I feel like Tōshirō's got a lot on his mind all the time… He's kinda like Roy Mustang in that sense? Considers himself to be pretty invincible... So, he has a tendency to overlook minor things like heat (rain in Mustang's case) on a daily basis. He was already pretty stressed when Tomoka came to get him, so… yeah… Got a heatstroke hahahahhaha I was being especially mean to him… Besides, I needed him to show a bit of his 'human' and vulnerable side to Hina. I bet that he'll be pretty embarrassed about that later on hhahahahahah xD

The adult form. Just. God. Goooooood. I died that day. I was actually reading the new chapter on a bus and kept giggling like an idiot through the whole ride… and the whole day… And then, for a week, whenever I thought of Tōshirō (he's my phone wallpaper, btw), I'd giggle like an idiot.
Though, nothing will make me forgive Kubo for killing IchiRuki… Maybe the fact that he didn't let HitsuKarin sail? That pairing is still killing me…

Anyways, thank you for the lovely review once again! I read it a number of times as I was writing the chapter to keep motivated!

Thank you everybody for reading and don't forget to vote on my profile!