Notes: Song recommendation / / "But the Regrets Are Killing Me" by American Football

Chapter 45
One Last Night

By the time they left the library, the day had vanished upon the dimming skies.

The dark of the evening quickly approached and blanketed the fiery skies in a comforting shroud of dusk – although much sooner than they expected. Silently, the Kazekage's masked bodyguard led his way down the worn village road that was bustling with the sounds of the night and content villagers. Voices were jeering, laughing, and echoing as they passed by the restaurant district with the distinct aroma of fried meat and rice marking the air. While Gaara followed behind her path, his thoughts became burdensome. The arranged marriage was drawing closer and he was near out of time.

And he had one final letter to write.

Desperately, he wanted to figure out a way to tell her the truth – everything – but nothing was coming to mind. It's a lost cause, he decided, I don't have it in me. Breaking her heart was the last thing he wanted, but he knew when he told her he would be breaking his as well. As they walked along the village road dotted with small shop stalls, barbeque huts, and sake bars, he remembered Naruto's words of advice that were fresh in his memory. "Tell her how you feel when the time is right! Maybe take her out for food or something?" As he could see the view of the towering village gates in the distance, he paused. Glancing at her back while she walked on, his insomnia-ridden eyes of a tanuki held both sorrow and a subtle hint of nervousness. Sensing his halt in his footsteps and his chakra turning inward, she came to a halt.

"What is it, Kazekage-sama?" She asked, turning to him with concern in her hidden eyes. "Is there something wrong? The Suna Council requested we return to the village immediately following the summit, so we don't have much time to stay here –,"

Surprising her, he averted his glance from her slightly – mulling over what he was going to say. Looking down at the thawing ground by his feet, he was choosing his words carefully. "Nomasaki, I was thinking…" He started, sounding somewhat flustered. "Before we go... -,"

Lifting up her mask, she examined his shyness before her, greatly striking her curiousness. Not once had she seen him that way. His chakra seems unsure, she realized, Is he alright? Feeling unsure of where he was getting at, she gave a glance in concern. "Yes?"

Once he noticed her deep lilac eyes looking back at him, he could feel his face begin to grow hot – blushing but ever so slightly. The feeling unnerved him. Never had he ever felt so emotionally uncomfortable yet assured at the same time. Averting his glance, he attempted to mask his emotions by trying his best to appear in his usual stoic nature. "Being that this mission is almost over, would it be okay if I… treat you to… a dinner, maybe?"

Stunned and flustered by his question, she could feel her face begin to redden greatly. His sudden request jolted her. Snapping her mask back over her face, she thought as if her heart was going to pound itself out from her closed chest. "A-Are you…?" She fumbled. "What are you asking…–?" As she could feel his eyes on her, she felt a jolt rush up through her trembling spine – remembering her assigned duties as a shinobi and the Kazekage's authority. Thinking over the possibilities, she forced her anxious mind that it was just a casual request – nothing more. However, her quickly beating heart thought otherwise. "I-I mean…! Y-Yes, I can allow that!"

That night within the heart of Konoha, the two Suna shinobi stopped at a small restaurant stall. Awkwardly and silent, they sat beside each other on separate stools with their gazes averted out of shyness and embarrassment. As the vibrant sounds of nightlife erupted into the air at full force behind them in the streets, Nomasaki did not know what to expect of their time together – and neither did Gaara. Was this a bad idea, after all? Shyly, his bodyguard hid her fluster under her tracker-nin mask.

"Round of drinks?"

With a friendly grin, the cook approached from beyond the counter - a tray full of sake held in his hands. Realizing what the drinks were, Gaara snapped out of his daze. Not once has he drunk alcohol and he was too nervous about it to give it a try. Witnessing Kankurō stumble home after a night out affirmed his decision.

"Not for me," He shook his head. "I don't –,"

"I'll have one!" Nomasaki blurted her words nervously – catching Gaara's curious attention. Grasping the small cup and bottle on the tray, she pulled her mask over her forehead and drank it as the cook walked back behind the curtain and out of sight. After swallowing, she grimaced from its sudden foul taste that graced her lips and throat. "Eck! It's sour!" She coughed, pulling her porcelain mask back down over her face. "What kind of milk is this? This must be some weird kind of Konoha milk… Why is it so strong?"

Stunned and curious, he turned to her and watched her slowly finish her drink – surprised and alarmed at her naivety of alcohol. Does she know it's sake? He asked himself, slightly troubled by her continued persistence to finish the beverage. As he watched her timidly try to relax her elbows on the counter, he decided to try his hand at talking. "...Are you going to remove your mask?" He started, hesitant at first. "You won't be able to eat with it on."

She flinched. "Y-You're right," She agreed, reaching for the straps behind her head. "Sorry, Gaara-sama."

With careful fingers, she released the latch hidden at the back of her golden hair and let the red ribbons fall from their hold. Slowly, her wolfish visage was removed. Placing it on the counter, its snarling muzzle glared back at the timid and blushing shinobi that once lay behind it. She always felt uncomfortable without her mask. It was her one saving grace from her chronic nervousness around the Kazekage – and now she was without it for him to see for himself. Noticing the purple sheen to her eyes as he glimpsed to his side, he was suddenly reminded of how fair she was. Under the guise of her mask and shinobi attire, her femininity was concealed for duty. Without her mask to shield her, he saw the gold of her hair and the red that tinted her soft face. Averting his eyes, he began to feel the warmth spread across his cheeks again and the nervousness return.

"If you don't mind me asking, what's the occasion?" She asked, turning to him after her cup was empty. A subtle wolfish grin was visible on her lips. "Surely, there must be a reason."

"Just to show my… appreciation for you taking part in this mission... after being gone for two years." He replied, his gaze fixated on the menu across from them at the stall. "Pick anything you want, it's on me."

Her face beaming with pleasant surprise, she could feel her stomach gurgling while she sat in anticipation for their meal. "That's very kind of you, Gaara-sama. Er… Gaara." She smiled. "Thank you!"

"What can I get for you folks tonight?"

"Can I have the fried meat and veggie skewer?" She asked, excitedly watching the cook emerge from the curtain cover to take their order. "And a side of honey?"

As Gaara turned to her direction, he gave a small smile upon seeing her excited expression. "I'll get the gizzard and rice. Water is fine."

"Comin' up!"

Once their food was eaten and their dishes clean, they sat once again in awkward silence. Despite her not enjoying its taste, she kept drinking the 'milk' from Konoha – refilling the cup as it became empty. Unknown to her, her coordination was beginning to slip away from her grasp. Why does this feel like alcohol? This doesn't taste like the alcohol in Yama.

As he sat beside her, his troubling thoughts about the future began to emerge from the back of his mind. Distracting himself and trying to enjoy what little time he had left to spend with his previous assistant, he was going to make the most of it. "Your father," He started. "He's the chieftain of Yamagakure, I hear. You wrote it in one of your letters."

"Yeah, it was interesting to hear the Kage talk about him." She nodded, pouring more sake into her cup. Thinking to herself, she gave a slight chuckle. "It's funny… He wasn't even from the mountains, but he claims it as his home. He was elected as their chieftain, too. The villagers really like him. My clan, too. Well… what's left of them, at least." Her eyes saddened slightly. "He said... he wanted to restore Yama to fix his wrongs, to honour the memory of my mother. It's incredible what he did, really. He visits her grave every day first thing in the morning. I can never bring myself to go... too many bad memories come up."

"Do you think you'll ever go back? To Yama, I mean."

As she rose the cup to her lips, the question paused her movements. Resting the cup back upon the counter before her, she pondered his words – her eyes closing halfway as she deeply yearned for her homeland in the far north. It has been so long since she last stepped into the gates of Yamagakure – the memory of the snow lilies dotting the village path and the frost-tinted air ached her with longing. A near week was long enough. Carefully, she calculated a response to tell him, as she was still unsure of it herself. "I definitely want to visit, but I'm not sure… Who knows? I do want to return, but... -," She hesitated her words. "I'm also bound to Suna. I'm a kunoichi who pledged her life to the village. How can I up and leave when I just came back? But then again, I have dual-citizenship now, so I can probably split time between both. If... that's something you'd be okay with, being that you're the Kazekage and all."

"It is, don't worry." While he collected his thoughts over what he wanted to say next, he glanced down at his crossed arms with eyes closed halfway – his evident sorrow for the future tinting his gaze. "Can I ask you something? Two things, actually."

"Sure, ask me anything you want!" Holding back her distaste for the foul drink, she drank another round of the sake. It appeared she was still unaware of its true identity yet her body began to feel cheerily strange. "We have one last night before we leave to Suna, so ask away."

His heart sank.

One last night to spend with you. "You mentioned... 'suitors' in your final letter. Do you... ever think about... -," His words stopped. Forcing himself, he continued. "...settling down?" She flinched. "You said you wanted to talk about it in your letter you sent, so I was... honouring that request."

Embarrassment entering her expression, Nomasaki snickered. "I'm... not sure yet. Maybe someday, when it's the right time. But that's the thing. I don't know if there will ever be a right time. It seems time is always against us as shinobi... for me, at least."

"How did you... deal with the suitors?"

She smiled, and to him the wolf in her was clearly within her eyes. "Scaring them off, of course! They wouldn't give up, the bastards were certainly persistent... I'd give them that. Not a single one even came close to besting me in combat - and without ninjutsu, too! They take one look at me and either faint or run away." She snickered. "Some even soiled through their robes. Serves them right, if you ask me."

"What if I... took you on?"

Nomasaki's eyes widened, surprised. "You? Do you mean... if you fought for... -?" My hand, she wanted to say - but the words never came. Flustered, she averted her glance timidly and looked back towards the menu sprawled behind the counter. "Well... I'd have to honour my rules, and try to scare you off. And if that didn't work, which I... don't think it would... I would... ask to fight you. If you lose, you go home to your desert. But if you win... well... -," She blushed, glancing to him beside her. "...you'd have me for your wife."

My wife.

The words shook through him, rendering him silent. Never before had he wanted to uphold the challenge to fight a wolf. Perhaps the council would prefer to allow him to follow a similar direction against his suitors - if he was to be persuasive enough. The silence did him no favours, but only to remind him that resistance was futile against his planned fate. Being born into the Kazekage clan had solidified that from the start.

Seeing his stunned expression, she looked away. "But you don't have to worry about that, I know better than to fight against a Kage. Besides, that's... silly, even." Brushing off her shyness, she glanced back to him. "Is there... anything else you wanted to ask me tonight?"

So much more. He reluctantly spoke the first thing that entered his mind. "Why did you… quit... and leave the village?" Surprised by his words, she turned to him – noticing his saddened expression in silence. "You left your position as my assistant so suddenly when the war ended… After we last saw Shukaku… The council had to tell me you resigned, and then I saw your note..."

As she placed her small cup down on the table, she looked ahead into the pale curtains – thinking over her answer. "Well," She sighed. "I… I wanted a change. The tracking unit was interested in me because of my abilities, so I accepted a full-time position." Her face grew sorrowful. "But... the war and the trial were a bit too much to weigh on my shoulders, so taking a leave-of-absence seemed the best route at the time. It was a well-needed departure, but... I felt guilty for leaving the way I did, but still... I needed to stop being your assistant, out of all my guilt the times had forced me to swallow."

"I see. I was worried I was the reason."

"Actually, you did play as a factor."

Surprised, he turned to her – stunned by the realization.

Catching wind of his response, she gave him an assured wave of her palm – her expression slightly nervous. "Not in a bad way, don't worry. It's just… Even though you forgave me, I still feel guilty about spying on you for the council. Also… A ninja is supposed to keep their emotions in check. And I… well… my emotions…" Sadly, her violet eyes closed halfway as she stared into the counter – prepared to bare her feelings to him as her inhibitions started to loosen around her. "I started… falling for you, and there's no end in sight, so… I had to quit as your assistant. You're the Kazekage, my superior… I was worried that would cause an upset if I… made clear my feelings to you. That's why I was hesitant to stay in touch these last two years. I still feel bad about it to this day…"

After hearing her confession, he sat in stunned amazement. She had the same feelings for him after all this time. Relieved and saddened, he closed his eyes – masking himself from showing visible emotion. "Don't," He replied. "I was also hesitant, for… similar reasons. I should've reached out to you since you left and asked you sooner... I should've wrote back and visited you. I'm sorry I didn't."

Slowly in a groggy haze, she rested her elbows on the counter and turned to him – smiling warmly at him in an uninhibited cheerful nature. "You're so nice!" She chuckled, letting out a brief sigh. "You act like you're so emotionless and tough, but deep down I know you're just a big softy who loves cacti. Just because you were a jinchuriki to a drunken tanuki doesn't mean you have to act so grumpy all the time."

Her words surprised him, but he knew they were true. Thanks to working as his assistant, she knew him almost as good as his own siblings – every habit, every shortcoming, and every pastime. Gently, he smiled to himself – feeling comforted by her kindness. As he thought of the impending arranged marriage waiting for him back in Suna, his ringed-eyes saddened as he looked down at his lap – knowing he had to come clean and tell her the truth.

Everything.

"Listen, Nomasaki... There's something I need to tell you now while I still have the chance. I'm not sure how you'll take it, but it's something you need to know... When we return to Suna, the council requests that I...–," Sensing a disconnect, he turned back to meet her giggling expression – her face reddening by the minute and seeming groggier as the night continued. Something was definitely off about her. Could it have been the sake she was drinking? "What's so funny?"

Letting out a soft sigh, she smiled to herself. "You make me so happy! You may be a Kage, but I'd still take you up on that offer for the suitor-thingy... I just want to… er..." She slurred. "Make you just as happy… happy, er…" To her surprise and embarrassment, she began to realize what was going on. Glancing closely at the cup and bottle by her side, she noticed they were both empty – not a drop of substance left. Suddenly, her drunken mind clued in on what was happening – she was drunk for the first time in her life. She sighed once more, embarrassed yet humored at the same time. "Gaara, I have a confession to make…"

"What is it?"

Woozy, she leaned her torso and arms onto the counter in a groggy motion. "I… I think I'm getting drunk. I don't… think that was milk…"

"So you've noticed?"

She snickered in her stupor. "You knew? A Kazekage should know how to properly prevent a lady from growing drunk! Let alone their bodyguard."

"You kept drinking it!" He countered, talking her down. "I assumed you knew!" As she continued to slur her words and hiccup to herself, he frantically raised his palm to the cook behind the counter. "Can we have the bill, please? Sooner than later?"

"Comin' up!"

Midnight grew closer.

Despite his bodyguard's accidental drinking and incoherent interruptions, he was somewhat relieved he did not have to tell her about the arranged marriage set up by the Suna Council and the Hoki Family. Although, she would find out eventually – which would effectively end their friendship and realized affections for another. And she would go back to the mountains of her homeland and never see him again for as long as either of them lived. The timing of their realized feelings for another could not have happened at a time more worse. Making sure the cook was properly tipped, the young Kazekage and his drunken confidant left the stall as midnight slowly approached in the bustling village.

An hour later into the night, the two shinobi stopped near a stone bench in an alleyway by a street lined with budding trees. The late winter still grasping to their frail branches, their buds covered in a faint sheen of frost. Collapsing to her knees in her incoherent state, Nomasaki vomited onto the stone cover of the alleyway – her throat burning with the bitter taste of alcohol and her skewer. Coughing, she panted as she could feel her head become dizzy, her hands grasping to the pavement in desperation to stay knelt above the ground.

"Take it easy," Gaara spoke, standing above her in the darkness. "I never imagined you'd be such a lightweight."

"I never imagined you'd… put up with me like this!" She coughed, snickering to herself in pity. "I really can't handle my liquor… I... should've known that was sake! The sake in Yamagakure is much stronger... so potent... I can't believe I was duped! I'm an idiot... truly."

Carefully, he knelt down before her, meeting her gaze as he formed a cloth in his palm with his sand – its shape forming in a light wisp of the wind. Gingerly, he patted the sand kerchief by the corner of her mouth – wiping away the last bit of evidence of her embarrassing night out as she sat knelt before him wide-eyed and stunned by his gesture. "You should slow down, alright? I know you're currently my bodyguard, but I'm also looking out for you. I care about you, Nomasaki. So don't push yourself."

Surprised by his kindness, she averted her drunken glance as his sand disappeared, smiling to herself with a faint chuckle. "You know, Gaara… you surprise me sometimes."

"How so?"

"It's just… you see… How do I say this while drunk…?" She began, her words slightly more coherent than earlier. "You're just… so caring and kind… It's no wonder why I'm... not surprised by how much I… love you."

Shocked by her words, he sat before her in silence.

His turquoise eyes widened by her drunken confession. The two were only breaths apart from another in that alleyway – their gazes meeting in the night. As he looked into her glossy eyes of soft lilac, he could feel himself become drawn to her – his chest swelling with the desire to express how he felt in that instant - but the words failed to come from his lips in time. All he could do was share a gaze of silent closeness with her. As she noticed his stunned expression directed towards her, her cheeks reddened greatly in her stupor – feeling every fibre of his warm chakra in the air around her.

"W-Why are you staring at me?" She stammered, worriedly. "Did I get sick again?"

Standing up, he gestured his palm towards her. Sand formed underneath her, gently lifting her up from the stone ground at her feet. Once she was seated at the bench, he signalled for her to stay put. "We should find somewhere for you to rest before it gets too late. You're in no shape to journey back as you are –,"

"There you are!"

The voice alarmed him from its shrill familiarity. Turning towards the bustling street close to where they stood, Temari approached them with an annoyed scowl. It was only then that Gaara remembered she was fulfilling her ambassador duties in the same place. "Temari -,"

"I heard you were in the village on Kage business," She spoke. "But I didn't think you were staying the night! Why are you still here?"

"Temari," Gaara started. "We could use your help."

"Huh?"

To her surprise, he gestured to Nomasaki who stood wobbly against a tree. She looked up to Temari, her eyes glossy and face red. "Temari, I am… quite intoxicated." She confessed, her speech even more slurred than before. "Can I… lay down somewhere?" Suddenly, she hiccupped. To their surprise, her face began to slowly shift into that of a beast – her wolfishness seeping through the cracks of her incoherent drunken state.

"What happened?" Temari stammered, still shocked at the beastly and groggy sight of her usually meek and calm friend – and not once did she think she was the type to go overboard. "Was she drinking?"

"She thought the sake was milk."

"Milk?!"

The sounds of nightlife soon vanished on the winds as they left the streets behind.

Stumbling through the weaving streets of the vast village in shadows, Temari took a drunken Nomasaki to the Nara clan's residence in the sheltered forested edge of the village – waking up a disgruntled Shikamaru in the process from the loud chatter and snarling cackles. Once Temari found her friend a bed in the winding house, she helped tuck her in the blankets – while Gaara let them have their privacy by staying in a separate room. Luckily, her friend's wolfishness all but disappeared as she grew more tired.

"There! There's no way you can roll out of this, the blankets are made from deerskin and weigh down on you like a ton of bricks." Temari sighed, pulling over the blankets up to Nomasaki's neck. "You can sleep here for the night. You're lucky the Nara clan is nice to visitors and had a spare room. And if you have to get sick, just don't do it on the bed. There's a bucket on the floor for you. Try not to fill the thing... Yoshino uses it for mopping the floors."

Snuggled in the heavy blankets, Nomasaki grinned. "I like the taste of venison. It's so good... the blankets smell nice."

Geez, she's really out of it. "Yeah... just don't eat the blankets."

"I won't." The tracker-nin slurred. "Thanks, Temari-senpai..."

"I keep telling you, you don't need to call me '-senpai'! We're both jonin -!" Realizing she was arguing with a drunk person, Temari calmed and took her leave. "See you in the morning... sober."

Tiredly and still drunk, Nomasaki looked up to her friend as she noticed her walking towards the doorway. Darkness entered as Temari blew out the candle, opening the sliding wooden door. "Temari, did you know?" She hiccupped. "Naruto's getting married to Hinata-sama!"

Catching her attention, Temari paused. "Yeah, we just got word from him personally a few days ago, but we knew about it last trip to Konohagakure a few months back –,"

"When are you and that Nara guy getting married? It's Shikamaru, right?"

Flustered and shocked, Temari blushed. "W-What the hell?! I-I… W-We had one date–!" Realizing her friend was still intoxicated, she sighed – brushing off her question as a drunken afterthought. Closing her emerald eyes, she smirked to herself. "You're drunk, go to sleep." Turning back to the door, she began to slide it closed.

"I would like to… get married someday… to your grumpy little brother…"

Shocked by her friend's whispering words, Temari's grasp of the sliding door paused. Looking back, Nomasaki was turned over in the blankets. Only the slight gleam of her gold hair was visible from the bedsheets. As the tracker-nin lay closer to sleep, her eyes filled up with sadness as she thought of him – the powerful Kazekage she was hopelessly in love with despite her internal pleas to ignore any affection. Hanone was right after all those years – she did indeed had feelings for him. And they stung hard.

"I love him a lot," She whispered. "But… I'm scared he doesn't…"

Feeling her conflicting emotions, Temari looked on with an sympathetic tint to her green eyes. Watching her with a saddened glance, she thought of her youngest brother and his struggle to express his feelings to others. Nothing's changed, then. In sympathy and sadness, Temari slid the door closed so that her friend could sleep. Further down the hall, she entered the outside porch adorned in lantern light and saw Shikamaru and Gaara sitting in silence. They both turned as she entered the room, Shikamaru with tired eyes and Gaara with eyes that held insomnia and hurt. Seating herself amongst them, she demanded Gaara tell her everything that has happened since leaving Sunagakure.

After he reluctantly revealed the arrangement, Temari grew furious.

"An arranged marriage?" She repeated. "You can't be serious..."

"That's what the council wants, and as of right now... I have no route of escape." Gaara explained, averting his glance to the tatami floor. "I refused the arrangement, but they're using the fate of the village against me... saying if I don't -," The word danced on his tongue, the notion irking him. "...produce an heir, then Sunagakure is doomed for unrest. And our village and clan will collapse."

"An heir -?! What the hell! Honestly!" Temari shouted, annoyed. She smirked out of anger, trying her best to keep her voice down. "The council has some nerve provoking that ancient tenet... the old bastards."

"What ancient tenet?" Shikamaru entered, raising a brow. "These Sunagakure customs seem strange, compared to life here, anyways."

Temari turned to the shrugging Nara. "It's custom for the heirs of the Kazekage clan to wed into either of the four noble families of the Land of Wind. That's how the village maintains the line of hereditary succession from the First Kazekage, Reto-sama." She scoffed, finding a scarce humour in it all. "Father was lucky that our mother was from the Kurogane clan, or else he would've been forced down that path as well."

"Line of succession?" Shikamaru groaned, scratching the back of his head. "How troublesome..."

"The woman is the heiress of the Hōki family, Hakuto is her name." Gaara spoke again, his voice quiet. "I'm... to meet her when we return, at the... oasis."

"Are you serious?!" Temari stood. "After all that you've been through, after pining for her for years - you're just going to toss Nomasaki aside?!"

"Temari," Shikamaru warned. "Keep your voice down. The clansmen are sleeping... my mother, too."

Gaara turned to her, his eyes sorrowful and full of guilt. "Toss her aside? Temari, I don't want to -,"

"Gaara," She began, her voice firm. "Do you love her?"

Surprised by her question, only silence answered.

"Well? Do you?"

The void in his stomach swelled, prompting him to surrender to his emotions. With his head of red hair hung low, he nodded. "Yes..."

"How troublesome..." Shikamaru grumbled, crossing his arms against his chest. "This is how political marriage sets it up for misery from the beginning. For one, the village shouldn't be forcing you to marry under pressure. And two, if an heir is so important to them... why not bother Kankurō or declare someone else as your heir should you die before stepping down? Or for that matter, dismantle the whole system altogether. That seems to be the only feasible route, but even that would be tricky."

"I've thought those options over during this journey, believe me. Yet... -," Gaara paused his words, coming to terms with fate. "I'm the Kazekage, so this is my duty."

"Duty." Temari snorted, anger evident on her lips. "For someone so adamant on moving the village forward, you had no problem buckling your knees to this! What will Nomasaki say?! What will she even think when she finds out, huh?!" The thought crossed her mind, glancing to her silent younger brother in urgency. "Does she even know?"

Silence again.

"Gaara, answer the question."

He shook his head, averting his saddened eyes. "...No. Not yet."

"Are you going to tell her?" Temari pressed, her glance changing from anger to disappointment. "Or should I go wake her up now and tell her myself?"

That was enough to make Gaara stand. "Don't, Temari. It's fine, I'll... break the news to her in the morning."

"Temari, we should go to bed." Shikamaru reminded, standing as well. "You have to return to Suna in the morning, you need your rest."

"How can I sleep given how angry I am?" She chided before turning on her heel. "Men are fools, if you ask me... even if they are Kazekage."

And the sliding door slammed shut behind her.

Yawning, Shikamaru followed after. Once the Nara and Temari were gone, Gaara was left alone with his thoughts and guilt that swirled endlessly in their torment. Temari was right to be angry, as both his sister and Nomasaki's friend. If Temari's reaction was any indication, it would be expected that the she-wolf would take the news in the same manner. Insomnia ate away at his want for sleep, prompting him to stay awake thick into the night. It was then he decided to write the third and final letter. Sitting on the porch while the dimming lanterns hummed and the air turned cool, the pen hesitated before the first stroke.

But the rest flowed as if steady water.

"Nomasaki,

What's more for me to say?

You left Sunagakure near two years ago now, and I've taken too long to write back. I hope you'll forgive me for that. Writing letters is not exactly my strong-suit (as you can tell), but I wanted to push myself to tell you exactly how I feel because of how important you are to me.

You were my assistant, my confidante, an unwilling spy for the resistance, and yet you are my friend after everything that's happened between us - and a close one, too. These last two years, I think I finally realize what you mean to me. You're admirably kind, delicate in your care towards others, and fiercely loyal to those that you love. I've seen it all within your purple eyes that you call strange. They are not strange in the slightest – believe me. All I see within your eyes is your unwavering kind heart. My eyes may be that of a tanuki, but even they can sense what you truly are. You've seen me become Kazekage, and I've seen you become a strong-willed kunoichi. You've given me your trust, your support, and your loyalty – but you've also given me something else. I think I finally realize what my eyes have deceived of me in all my years trying to understand my connections with others. It's what I've known for years, since we talked on that snowy hilltop near the Land of Claws.

Nomasaki, I love you.

That's all I want to say.

When you read this letter, I may not have told you this yet myself. I have to admit, I am still working on expressing myself all these years later, so bear with me, okay? I hope you are well, wherever you may be. When we see each other again, let's get together and talk about all that we missed while we were apart. Who knows? Maybe I will be your next suitor and will challenge you for your hand (poor joke, I know - but that's your call to make). Let's talk first, then we can discuss settling down together.

I love you.

Gaara"

Reading what he just wrote, the words stung like a dagger to the heart.

And he loved her.

Notes: When Nomasaki tells Gaara that to win her hand, he would have to engage in battle with her and win - it is a nod to a historical figure - Princess Khutulun of Mongolia, who refused to marry any man unless they defeated her in combat.

Born in the 13th century CE, Khutulun was the daughter of Kaidu, who was the great-grandson of legendary Mongolian leader Genghis Khan. Khutulun was praised for her prowess in battle and accompanied her father in his many military campaigns. She was also an avid wrestler and challenged all of her suitors, and refused to many any man she could defeat. From her victories, she amassed thousands of horses. She eventually married, but the name of her spouse has long been debated. Varying accounts say her husband was a failed assassin of her father, a political ally, or a Persian prince. Her story was recorded by Marco Polo in his journals.

This mirrors Nomasaki in a way regarding her prowess as a kunoichi, and her refusal to the suitors who approached her in Yama after her father became chieftain of the village. In a way, it also reflects her relationship with Gaara - who is a political ally to her father (and is a son of Kyō's childhood friend, Rasa), and is from a noble and politically powerful family but not necessarily a prince.