Kokoa pulled the sheets up over her head. She dreaded leaving bed. She didn't want to – couldn't face today. Reaching out, she pulled the photograph from the drawer. She stared at it, at his smile, the way they stood side by side. If Itachi was still in Konoha, she would have taken him out today for a few rounds of birthday dango. Sadly, it was impossible. He was gone, and Kokoa would have to "forget" it was his birthday for Sasuke's sake.

Resting the photo against the left of her chest, she shut her eyes, letting her tears trickle down onto the pillow.

"Good morning, Kokoa-chan."

"Morning, Sasuke." She managed a smile. She gave him a look when he chuckled softly.

"Something wrong?" She raised an eyebrow.

"Your hair."

"What of it?"

"It's a mess."

"I wasn't planning on leaving the house. Don't laugh," she pouted, pulling it back into a messy bun.

"Sorry, sorry. Let's do something today."

"I'm tired," she lied.

"Please? I'm going to be so bored. Let's train, or go on some adventure. Please, Kokoa-chan."

"Sasuke…"

"Please?"

"…Fine," she sighed. She wished he had academy classes today. She would have stayed in bed until he came home in the afternoon.

"Training."

"Let me get my things then." She dragged herself away.

"So have you talked to Ryuuji lately?" Sasuke grinned, sitting beside Kokoa in the grass after an intense training session.

"Not since the fishing," she said softly.

"He's nice. He's smart too."

"Yeah?"

"I like his hair."

"It is nice."

"Can he come over for dinner?"

"Eh?"

"Dinner."

"Not today. I'm a mess, and so is the house. I haven't been to the market either."

"Oh. Maybe another time."

"Maybe."

"Let me know so I can tell him. He'll be happy," he smiled. Kokoa watched him with sad eyes. He was desperate to replace Itachi, desperate to fill the void, the position of his older brother. Ryuuji was good for Sasuke. He encouraged the child, kept him busy, but every time she saw the boy with his indigo hair and his indigo eyes playing or walking with Sasuke, she pictured Itachi. This boy was trying so hard to insert himself into the family Sasuke and Kokoa had become, and she disapproved.

"You did well on your latest mission, Kokoa."

"Arigato, Hokage-sama," she replied, avoiding his eyes.

"You definitely deserve the title of jonin. I'm proud of you," Sarutobi stated. She remained silent.

"Are you upset about something, Kokoa?"

"No, Hokage-sama."

"Something is troubling you. If there is, you need to tell me."

"Just some trouble with ANBU," she mumbled.

"ANBU?" He questioned before realizing Danzo had his Root members watching her.

"Hai. They pop out of nowhere, even in my house…one in particular," she spat.

"I apologize, Kokoa, but it's standard practice. There are rules."

"Rules? In what world are there rules that allow the Hokage's top shinobi to harass an innocent person?" She faced him.

"Kokoa –"

"You still think I had something to do with it. My life has been hell. It's been one big nightmare. I keep praying that one day I'll wake up, but every day just gets worse. Why can't you see that? Why can't you sympathize? Take pity on me? You know me. I have worked under you for so long. I have proved my skill and my loyalty to you and to Konoha. Why won't you make it stop? Please?" she begged. He glanced away at the pain in her voice and eyes.

"You have proved your loyalty to myself and Konoha, but over the years you have also proven your loyalty to Uchiha Itachi. Until we find him, and until we figure it all out, I cannot call off the ANBU. It also isn't completely in my hands. There are other elders who wouldn't be pleased if I dropped you as a suspect. It's what has to be done. I am sorry, Kokoa."

"Sorry? You're not sorry. If you were sorry, you wouldn't torture a committed shinobi who lost everything all over again! You're watching me fall apart day by day, never reaching out to help. I thought you liked me. I thought I could trust you as my leader, but you've let me down."

"That's no way to speak to your superior," he said firmly.

"I don't care anymore. I don't care. I just want it to stop." She held her head. "I was not involved in the Uchiha massacre, and I don't know where Itachi is, and I will take that to my grave. That is my truth."

Sitting alone in his room, Itachi gazed at the floor, lost in thought. Today was a special day – or it would have been if none of this mess ever happened. He didn't care much for silly holidays, but he knew Kokoa would have changed his mind just this day, like she did every year. The fact she held onto the pendant, the fact she hadn't forgotten him…it eased his mind and the pain in his heart just a bit. But it also dropped a heavy load of guilt onto his shoulders. Although he wanted more than anything to be with her, he broke her heart. He couldn't return to her, but Kokoa…Kokoa could and would spend the rest of her life chasing after the man who hurt her most.

Sasuke fell asleep early and quickly that night, exhausted from training. Kokoa moved around quietly in her room, slipping into something lighter, more traditional; a very simple kimono, one she kept in her closet over the years for the occasional special event. Tidying herself up a bit, she headed for the door, but not before leaving a note outside of Sasuke's door, letting him know she went out for a bit if he were to wake up and not find her there.

Although it was dark out, it wasn't too late. People still roamed the streets, and several stands were still open, selling food and trinkets. She pulled the money from her pouch before walking up to one of them. Click. Click. Click. She walked to a nearby bench. She held the stick up. Sadly eyeing the dango, she used her free hand to brush away the warm tears dripping onto her kimono.

"Happy birthday, Itachi-san."