"You're leaving?"
"New mission. Kakashi says we have to take it. Honestly, it has been a while, Kokoa."
"I just - I just worry, you know."
"I know."
"Things will only get harder as you grow older."
"Then I'll have to get stronger," he said, Orochimaru flashing through his mind.
"How is it? Your curse mark I mean."
"There. It's fine...for now. How about you? Your head?"
"Still excruciating. I want to split my head open with an ax to make it stop, or smash my face against glass. It's ruthless, whatever the hell it is."
"Any idea? Kakashi was here talking about it, right?"
"...He said there's nothing in my tests. Even the mighty Tsunade couldn't find anyhting," she mocked with a wave of her hands. "I told Kakashi I might just be out of my mind, and I'm starting to believe it, that I may have...mental issues..." she turned her face.
"Are you gonna follow up on that or diagnose yourself?" he sighed.
"Hm?" she glanced over, surprised by his reaction. "What, not surprised I might be crazy, Sasuke? People already talk. Can you imagine if I really am –"
"So what? If you're sick then get help and get better because I hate seeing you like this. People are going to talk regardless, so you might as well feel ok about yourself while they are. If you're sick, then you're sick. Sucks ass, I know, but it can't be helped, and I'd be quite the asshole if I laughed at you for having mental issues when I myself have freaked out in the past." He slipped into his shoes and adjusted the pouch on his leg. Kokoa stood there speechless. This was possibly the first time Sasuke so willingly admitted his faults and allowed Kokoa to have her own.
"So you..."
"So I'm not going to run away if you really are crazy, Kokoa," he smirked. "I said I'd be there for you. Besides, it's not like you do it on purpose. That bastard is the one who caused all this, not you," he mumbled. She glanced away, chewing on her lip. Sasuke paused, catching what he had said. Kokoa loved Itachi but Sasuke could only say negative things about him. He still couldn't accept her feelings.
"Well I'm off. Be careful. Get some rest. You'll have a few days to just sleep."
"I'll try."
"All right. Good." He nodded before heading for the door.
"Ne, Sasuke?" she called out softly. He paused in the doorway, turning only his head.
"Thank you."
"Ah." With a nod, he gently shut the door behind him, forcing the sun back outside, leaving Kokoa in the dim light. She fell onto the sofa with a thud, head thrown back, eyes shut, falling asleep in minutes.
"All right, now I know it's only the beginning of the year, but that doesn't mean we're going to take it easy," the instructor started. "We're doing a project next. You already have the prompt. You will work in pairs or groups of no more than three. Because you've been well behaved so far, I will allow you to choose your partners, but I warn you, choose wisely. Your partners will most likely be yours until the end of the year. You will work on this over the next few days." He gazed out at his class, sighing at their bored faces.
"All right, fine. Go ahead and pick your partners." He shook his head as he strolled back to his desk. At once, the students came to life, rushing across the room and up and down the rows to meet up. She sat not in the far back but not necessarily up front either, more towards the middle, tapping a pencil against the blank sheet of paper lying on the desk before her. She quietly rose to her feet, scanning the room, rubbing her arm shyly.
"Kin! Over here"
"Sora, partners?"
"Karin, Reiji!" They huddled together. Kokoa remained in place, unsure how to ask, unable to open her mouth and speak up. There were plenty of pairs who could add a third member, and no one really had a problem with her, but she found it hard to make the first move, so she stood there, struggling with herself.
Sitting to her left in the row above her, Itachi also scanned the room. He really wasn't fond of group assignments, but it couldn't be helped.
"Minori, should we find a third person?"
"Is there anyone left?" They turned, looking around. Kokoa noticed, and her lips parted, but nothing came out. Sighing in frustration, she let her shoulders fall, hating herself for being so shy, always missing out on things. Shifting to sit down, she glanced up, meeting onyx eyes that held a maturity the rest of the students lacked; knowledge and awareness of the world. She immediately glanced away, shaking dark hair into her face.
"It seems we're the only two left," Itachi uttered.
"I - uh - I guess so," she agreed.
"So would you like to work together?"
"H-hai," she replied. He nodded, unaffected by her stammering. He held up the paper, reading over the prompt. Peeking over it,
"Can you write?"
"Can I write?" She tilted her head.
"Are you any good?"
"I think - yeah - yes."
"Mm." He continued to read. Kokoa watched him. They had never interacted before. Granted, it was still the beginning of the year, but she found it odd the two quietest kids in class never quite had a conversation. Judging by the situation, all that was about to change. Itachi's dialogue was short, but there was a kindness behind it that eased Kokoa.
"It should be easy, don't you think?" he inquired.
"Mhm," she nodded. He furrowed his brow.
"Did you read the prompt?"
"Eh..." she froze. "I skimmed over it, but I haven't had trouble with anything yet. I think it will be ok."
"Yeah?" he chuckled. "You do have one of the highest scores of our grade. Kuroki, right?"
"Hai," she said, surprised he knew her name. "And your name -"
"Uchiha," he replied, wondering how she'd react. Kokoa thought for a moment. Uchiha. She knew of them. An elite and old clan of Konoha. Possessors of the sharingan. He must be Itachi, the prodigy of said clan. She blinked, surprised to learn he was Itachi, but other than that brief blink, it didn't show. He looked like everyone else; a young boy in a blue shirt with dark hair and dark defined eyes. What affected her more than his name was the gentle smile upon his lips.
"Uchiha, ah," she said in acknowledgement. He waited a moment, wondering if she'd say anything else on the matter; if she'd swoon or challenge him, if she'd think he was arrogant or she'd throw herself at him. He found it odd, almost refreshing, that the shy little girl stood with an awkward smile, rubbing her arm whilst trying to think of something to say to ease the silence that had settled over the two.
"We both read the section. I can start the first half of the requirements and you can do the others. Once that's out of the way we can put them together for the final coherent piece. How does that sound?" he suggested, curious what type of partner she was. Kokoa was a brilliant student, but many times even the best students didn't make such helpful partners.
"I'll start as soon as I get home. Promise," she assured him. He nodded, indicating he'd do the same.
"Same here. I promise."
Writing something at his desk, Itachi peered up at the small figure hovering above him.
"Kuroki."
"I finished my part," Kokoa said, handing him her paper.
"All of it?"
"Mmm, most. I could go back and edit, but I thought we could do that when we merge papers - unless you want me to do it now!" she rambled. "You tell me."
"Is it any good?" He set it down.
"Good? You - you could read it -"
"But I'm asking you," he said gently. "You did say you were a good writer, which is why I'm asking."
"I guess," she shrugged. "I think it's decent."
"Decent?" He raised an eyebrow. "How do you really feel? Don't be so modest."
"I - I'm confident in my work! I went over it a bunch of times, and -and I like this project, so I put in all my effort," she explained, as if trying to pitch a sale. "But like I said, if you see anything that needs worked on, tell me. I'd hate to ruin this project for you, Uchiha -"
"Hn," he smiled slightly. "You can't be confident and then tell me it's ok to tear your work apart. You said you were happy with it, so I trust you."
"Are you sur -"
"Also, we're about the same age. You can call me Itachi," he told her, finding no need for too many formalities.
"Hai," she nodded. She smiled shyly after the shock of his trust wore off. "I'm Kokoa."
"Kokoa..." her name drifted from his lips.
"I should get back to my seat before Sensei yells at me."
"We'll talk later," he agreed, watching her jog back down to her row.
Kokoa trekked home, juggling a few books and notebooks, being quite the avid reader. She paused, turning her head to look behind her. Her eyes widened. She turned completely to face him, almost tripping and spilling her belongings in the process.
"Itachi-san?" she gasped. He laughed quietly, rushing over to help steady the load in her arms.
"Did I scare you? I'm sorry if I did," he told her.
"No - well I didn't expect it to be you," she said. "Arigato."
"Ah."
"Did you need something? My paper? Is there a mistake -"
"Are you always this worried about your work?" he teased. "I read over it, and it was fine. In fact, you brought up a point I completely missed. I guess you're one of the top scores for a reason."
"Well there is that, but imagine how embarrassing it'd be if I messed up in front of the person with the highest score," she giggled.
"So you're trying to beat me?"
"It'd be nice, but reaching your level would be just as satisfying."
"One thing's certain, we know which group will get the best grade.
"Mhm!" she nodded.
"Where are you headed?"
"Home. I live over that way, near that one training field. Tch, I can't remember its name, but you know, over there," she pointed in the distance.
"What do your parents do? Work wise, I mean. Shinobi?"
"Actually, they're no longer alive," she said quietly. His expression softened.
"I was told they were killed in action."
"You were told? What, you don't believe it?" he furrowed his brow.
"No one will tell me anything, who they were or what they did. Nothing. Only that they were shinobi and died in the line of duty. I know it's probably because they think I'm too young, but don't you think I deserve to know what happened, Itachi-san?"
"Of course."
"I can handle it. Besides, all I have left of them is a photograph they took when I was just a baby. Probably their last photo. I never knew them, but knowing what happened would make me feel better." She fell quiet, confused as to why she had revealed so much to this boy she barely knew.
"I believe you'll learn the truth one day, Kokoa."
"You think so?"
"Ah. In time."
"In time...what about you, Itachi-san? Where do you live?"
"The Uchiha compound, over that way," he pointed.
"Oh, of course," she chuckled. "And your family?"
"A mother and father, although my father is always telling me what to do," he pouted. "And I have a little brother, Sasuke."
"A little brother? How awesome. I always wish I had a little brother or sister, someone to just be around."
"Why don't you set those books at your place and then join me."
"Eh? Join you for what?"
"I was going to stop at home and surprise Sasuke, take him out for a snack. I'm thinking dango. You should come. You can meet him. I think he'd like you."
"Really?"
"Mm, and we can talk more about our project."
"I," she pondered the offer. Return to an empty house or have fun for once with a boy who seemed as interested in her as she was in him? "All right, but like you said, let me take these home."
"Here," he took the top half of the stack from her. "I'll help."
"Arigato, Itachi-san."
Kokoa sat up slightly hunched over, hands lying in her lap. She gazed down at her palms, squinting to see them in the dark. She looked up across the room. That's right, Sasuke had left. That's why the only sound that assured her she was home was the dripping of the faucet down the hall. That wasn't the first time Kokoa had dreams like that. Actually, they were more like memories, memories that were a bit foggy when awake, but so vivid, and raw, and distressing when asleep. That was her first encounter with Itachi, the first time they spoke, the first time he smiled at her and invited her for a snack. That time in her life, that silly little project, as cliché as it was, was the thing that brought the two together.
"He couldn't have faked it," she mumbled, laying back down and pulling the blanket over her head. Despite being in almost total darkness with the lights off and shades drawn, violent migraines wracked her head and neck, leaving her almost immobile. She was right, however. He couldn't have faked it. Itachi couldn't have faked those moments.
"He was so young…" Surely he wasn't planning to kill his own clan at that age, still a young boy in the academy. He couldn't have used her. Her grip on the blanket tightened.
"He was too kind. He was innocent. He was gentle," she muttered, burying her face in the pillow.
"But…" What if his feelings at that age were true, that he really was her friend, but something in him changed along the way and he decided to use her? He took advantage of her kindness and her devotion. He played her –
"No. No, he didn't – he couldn't have. He was always so kind. He never…" True, he never showed any sign of hostility, of greed or hatred. He was always respectful and kind, and he sought to protect what he loved most.
"But he showed Sasuke…" Itachi did kill them. There was no denying it. He was guilty, his hands stained by Uchiha blood, the blood of his kin. And he had told her when they met that he severed his ties with Konoha, that the village and everyone in it no longer had any value to him.
"But you're still the most important thing in my life." She sat up with a painful groan, tossing the blanket aside. Her heart thumped loud and fast. Her head pounded, it pounded like a hammer against nails; sharp pains shooting across as if someone struck her with an ax; temples throbbing from an arrow piercing one side and exiting the other; an unbearable, blinding, crippling pain that left her in tears, silently screaming as she clawed at her face.
Stumbling from the couch, she burst through the front door, nearly tripping and falling down the stairs of her apartment complex. Wobbling down and using the rails for support, she found herself in the street, although unaware that's what it was. She stood in place, hair scattered, eyes wide, tears pouring, fingers tangled in black tresses and sitting anxiously between her lips. Another surge of pain struck her, and she fell to her knees.
"Itachi! Itachi!" She shrieked at the top of her lungs, so loud she felt a tinge of pain in her throat, as if she ripped her vocal chords.
"Itachi!" The second half of his name was muffled as she fell forward, forehead against the stone ground, hysterical and in agony.
Still near the outskirts of Konoha, Itachi turned, gazing out into the distance, swearing he heard his name. But who would call for him? Sasuke was bent on revenge, and Kokoa knew better than to make that mistake. He shut his eyes, continuing to walk. Perhaps being unable to see Kokoa was a sign, a sign that he should leave things as he intended, that he should forget about ever telling her the truth. It would only cause her trouble, and much more pain. Deciding it was best, he began leaving, heading back to the base where Kisame hopefully covered for him.
"What was I thinking? How could things ever be all right? How could we ever watch the sun set, Kokoa?" Lifting a hand, nails polished, he propped up the collar of his cloak. Itachi wouldn't go after her again, and he would never tell her the truth. He would never try to fix things or give her hope. She wasn't the naïve little girl anymore. He couldn't walk in and think an apology would earn her forgiveness even if she made it seem that she would. She had grown without him, and she would continue to do so. She would learn to live without Itachi – she would have to. And she would learn things about herself in the process, things a select few knew of. Remembering what Shisui had once shared with him, Itachi knew being near Kokoa would be dangerous. If he wanted to protect his secret and continue living as he was and letting Sasuke and Kokoa deal on their own, he would have to avoid her at all costs.
"Does she know anything about her clan? It's a small one, scattered, but what really surprised me was this, Itachi."
"What?"
"One second," he chuckled, carefully folding and unfolding parts of the document.
"Mmmm, here. Look. Do you think she knows?"