Chapter 6: Drift
He was aware that the Enterprise was a fairly large ship, that he couldn't get between the lightning strikes, and that fully assessing the extent of the damage would take time. From his command chair, Jim stared at the sensor screens. According to the star map, they were entering the bulk of the nebula. The gas clouds were denser and there was no way to know what they would run into until they got their noses in front of it.
Jim just hoped he wouldn't run into any enemy outposts. If they did, they would have no way to escape, their deflectors wouldn't hold against a major attack, and the ship's drift made it impossible to maneuver. If more storms came, their ship would take heavy damage.
His gut was clenched with anguish. The Enterprise couldn't take much damage. The last time this had happened, he had miraculously managed to restart the reactor and the ship had crashed to Earth. In the current situation, they already didn't have their engines. If they had been near a planet, the attraction would have caused them to crash. And if they crashed... there would be no one to rescue his crew. Everyone would inevitably face death.
The thought of being responsible for such a massacre made him nauseous. He knew he had to remain strong, upright, and appear calm if his mood was to reassure the crew. Jim tried to hide his anxiety by reading the latest reports sent on his PADD. He wanted to capture the complete history of their journey. No intercepted communications, no trace of passage.
He would stay on the alert until the shift change. It had been hours since the incident and Jim reluctantly left the main deck. He needed to make himself more useful and since he hadn't received any reports from the machinery for a while now, he decided to go there, making a stop in the sick bay.
When he arrived, he found an exhausted staff. Christine and Bones were at their desks, completely washed out and on the verge of drowsiness. Their patients were stable and three were out of it, while one still hadn't woken up. Jim looked around their bedside before turning back to Bones. Christine had fallen asleep on his shoulder.
"I'm sorry about your evening," he said quietly so as not to wake anyone.
The chief physician made a face.
"It's not your fault, Jim. What's the situation here? The ship is unusually quiet. "
Jim grimaced in turn. Bones had felt the absence of vibration. It was light, you didn't feel it anymore when you were on board and used to it. But Bones hated space and must have been one of the sensitive people. He wasn't the only one. Jim knew he had to keep the crew informed at some point. He would wait until the next day. However, he could keep his friend in the loop.
"We're adrift, the reactor is down. I'll go check with Scotty. "
Jim knew that Bones would understand the gravity of the situation, even without the details. Bones nodded briefly so as not to disturb Christine. Jim nodded to Christine.
"You should take her home to sleep. And go, too. The guard team is already here. "
Bones agreed.
"We'll do that. "
Jim gave him a weak smile and headed for the exit.
"I'm sorry, Jim. That it goes this way. "
The Captain left. So was he.
He went to the side of the defective pod. He passed several technicians on the road and found his chief engineer there. Scotty was there, immersed in reading a multitude of data. His face was stern and Jim felt the bile rise in his throat.
"How's it coming ? "
Scotty let out a deep sigh.
"Bad. Very bad, Captain. We're in it up to here ! "
He pointed to the level of his neck. The blond nodded.
"Explain all. "
And Scotty launched himself at full speed.
"There are multiple internal electro-plasma leaks, the injectors are shot, the external generator is completely burned out, the transformation chamber is damaged and if we don't fix it right away, the antideuterium could kill us all! Not to mention that there's -"
Jim stopped him with a wave of his hand.
"I take it back, Scotty. Summarize. "
The engineer made another face.
"The starboard pod is out of action. It's busted from the transformation chamber to the warp plasma drive and the external generator. Roughly speaking, without the pod, there's no Warp engine. From what the data indicate, if we hadn't shut down the reactor, we would have been exposed to a lot of radiation leakage and the pod would probably have imploded. "
Jim felt his stomach tighten. He clenched his teeth before resuming:
"Mr. Scott, we're probably in enemy territory. We need to get out of here. Can we make the necessary repairs to get out of this damn nebula, given the situation? "
Scotty looked at the data again, making a new face.
"I can probably tinker with a few things, but some of it's going to be risky, and it won't last very long. Just long enough to get us back to a nearby base. "
Jim nodded.
"That's all I ask. That we can at least get out of here to get rescued without endangering other Federation ships. " He paused, thinking. "What kind of risky interventions? "
Scotty scratched the back of his ear. A nervous tic he had often enough.
"Did I tell you about the external generator ? It's damaged. The fastest and safest way to fix it is to get out. DOTs won't be able to provide the necessary repairs, it has to be someone. "
Jim immediately shook his head.
"That's out of the question. That's completely out of the question. I'm not letting anyone off the ship. Do you have any idea how dangerous it is with these unpredictable storms and the debris around? We don't have any deflectors left! "
Scotty scratched his ear again.
"I know, Captain, but we're going to have a hard time getting out of here if we don't go to super speed. "
Jim clenched his fists and gritted his teeth. He didn't like the idea. He hated it.
"How long will the life support generators be able to compensate? "
The engineer tapped on his screen.
"A month. Fortunately for us, they're intact. Our first priority will be to work on the leaks, and after that, we'll be able to work on the reactor after we've restarted it. All we have to do is manually shut down the power to the work areas. "
Jim nodded.
"Time is on our side, Scotty. If we're in enemy territory, every minute counts. I'm sending you all the backup you can spare. "
He nodded.
"I'll organize the repair crews. "
Jim, meanwhile, went to the first internal communications terminal to address the entire crew directly.
He made a short announcement, despite the advanced hour. He asked everyone who was competent or had a minimum of engineering knowledge to go to the machinery. Then he joined Scotty, who was already assigning tasks. Jim joined the group. He wanted to be helpful; he had some knowledge of electromagnetic engineering and knew something about how the electro-plasma conduction system worked. He could help. He wanted to help. He needed to.
He volunteered to be part of the first response team. Repairs had to be continuous and it was important to have several shifts. He was sent under the supervision of engineers much more competent than himself to check for leaks in the deuterium and antideuterium fusion chamber. Concentrating on his task, he almost forgot the distressing situation they were in. Almost.
Their scanners had been damaged in the storm. The images that had been recorded were flawed and Spock had had to process the images to get them clear. It had taken some time, but when he finally had the images, he had immersed himself in his task.
The work he had started took him several hours. He could easily identify which ships were involved, but the challenge was to determine how many and what type of ships they were: fighters, freighters, scouts, etc. He had excluded warships from the start because of the size of the debris.
What Spock found was disturbing, he had to admit. The debris was mostly collected and the bulk of the pieces were close together. This indicated that the debris had drifted little, and therefore that at least one ship had been destroyed recently. Other pieces showed the wear and tear of age, and the small amount also indicated that the ship in question had been destroyed long ago. The parts had been there after the storm. Spock was convinced that with a smaller ship, a single bolt of lightning would have been enough to cause this finality.
He did two checks before he was certain of his conclusions. When he was, he realized that he had been working on this project all night and had not heard from them. He immediately consulted his PADD to update himself. The maintenance crews had already taken two shifts, the second round had just begun. He had no notes from his captain since the beginning of the night.
Spock wrote his report and entered it directly into the Enterprise database. Now that he was out of work and his concentration had waned, he thought about Jim. Unconsciously, he looked down at his hand. That hand that had caressed Jim's. The sensation seemed so far away and yet he could still feel the softness of his skin embedded in his memory.
Jim was unconsciously seeking his touch, Spock knew that. It was a reaction that he himself had prepared to feel, but he wouldn't have thought it would be Jim's as well. He had been prepared to keep his distance while his katra and body got used to the change and his frustration subsided. But every time he came face to face with Jim, the urge to touch him was so strong that it was hard to fight. Sometimes the gesture was so natural, so unconscious, that he didn't realize it until it was too late.
In the long run, this situation would fester and be unbearable for him and Jim. Spock had no idea that the bond would grow so strong so quickly. He thought he would have to be around Jim longer for it to take this turn. If only Jim's feelings had been any different...
The thought brought out his anger and jealousy. This primitive aspect of his Vulcan side disgusted him, but it was hard to fight it as he realized that the bond he shared with his t'hy'la was growing stronger. But he had to face it. He and Jim could not have more than a friendly relationship.
Spock was aware of the problem, and it was growing rapidly. He was beginning to think that Nyota was right, he should talk to Jim about it. Maybe he should. But he had no idea how Jim would react to this, he was too unpredictable.
He took a deep breath. He had to tell him about his discovery anyway, before he could inform the crew of their situation. He tried to reach Jim on his personal communicator when he remembered seeing his name on the maintenance crew list. Spock knew his Captain well enough to be sure he was still there. By the time the two crews had a chance to review the tasks at hand, he would arrive in time to intercept Kirk.
Within minutes of leaving his lab, Spock was on the main engineering deck. The teams had already split up. He spotted Scott in his path, talking with Lawton, the plasma conduction expert. Not seeing Jim, he headed toward them.
"I'm looking for the Captain. Do you know where he is? "
Scott shook his head in the negative. It was the blonde who answered him:
"He's near the transformation chamber, I spoke to him just a few minutes ago. "
Spock thanked her and turned to Scott.
"You should get some rest. "
The engineer smiled.
"Count on it, Commander, I'm on pins and needles! "
Spock nodded and headed to the designated area.
He walked about twenty meters before he saw Jim. Sitting at the top of the stairs, his head was tilted against the railing. Spock went up to join him without trying to call out to him. Jim wouldn't answer. Not when he was so tired.
He reached him. His clothes were dirty and burned in places. Soot had blackened his face and his shirt, which was ruined again anyway. His face looked peaceful. Jim looked peaceful when he slept, yet Spock could feel his anxiety. He gently put his hand on his arm to wake him up.
"Captain. "
Jim woke up violently and Spock stepped back reflexively. For a moment, fear was visible in his eyes. It rekindled Spock's anger.
"Damn, how long have I been asleep? "
Spock refocused on the situation, trying to keep his emotions in check.
"Only a few minutes. You'd better return to your quarters. "
Jim nodded and stood up.
"Yes, I'll do that. Now that the relief is here... "
They walked down the stairs. Spock couldn't help but remark.
"This is the second relief team. You could have left by now. "
They returned to the turbolift.
"You know very well I wouldn't have done that. "
Spock couldn't argue with him. He was sure he would find him there. They climbed into the cabin.
"Who's in charge?" Jim asked.
"Lieutenant Sulu has just taken command while we get some rest. "
There was a moment of silence. Jim didn't speak again until they were out of the turbolift.
"I take it that if you're here, you know who those guys were outside. "
Spock nodded.
"They are Reman and Romulan ships. The Romulan wreckage appeared to be a transport ship, early model. There are at least two other, newer Reman scout ships. "
Jim remained unmoved.
"How much newer? "
"It's hard to estimate their date from photographs, especially after they were destroyed. "
His captain ran a hand through his hair.
"Spock, if you don't have the exact date, I want an estimate. Or a range, if you prefer. I want an order of magnitude. "
His intonation was harsh. Jim dialed his entry code and Spock naturally followed him inside.
"These ships show no signs of age. I estimate their date of creation to be no more than two years."
Jim sighed as he helped himself to the water. He offered him a drink as well and Spock nodded. Jim gulped down his drink. Spock recognized this as a trait of his anxiety. Jim took a deep breath before facing him.
"Let's focus on the repairs. We'll make a statement to the crew tomorrow about the situation. I want them to know. "
Spock nodded.
"Good, Captain. "
The Vulcan turned to the door to turn around. He could feel Jim's anguish. It made his heart ache, but he couldn't stay. He shouldn't stay. He instinctively turned to Jim. Their eyes met. A moment of hesitation passed. A time in which Spock weighed the pros and cons of staying. He must not think about it. He shouldn't indulge in such fantasies. He broke the exchange of glances.
"Good night, Captain. "
Jim turned his head away.
"Good night, Commander. "
Spock forced himself not to look at Jim as he could feel his pain. He reluctantly left his superior's quarters, aware of one thing: the attraction between them was stronger than he had estimated.
Jim slept for only a few hours. After the night he'd just had, though exhausting, his anxiety had kept him alert. That and... and this situation with Spock. Jim had come close to making a fool of himself in front of his commander. He'd come this close to asking him to stay. Stay for what? How could he justify that?
He tried to think of something else. He went to the upper deck, where Sulu seemed to have the situation under control.
"Captain on deck," said the pilot.
Jim gestured with his hand for him to sit down.
"You're not at rest, Captain? " he asked.
The pilot stared out. A few pieces of shipwreckage were visible, but the outside seemed quiet.
"Yes, but I have work to do. Scotty needs people. When Chekov and Astan take their shift, send them down. Their skills will come in handy. "
Sulu nodded.
"Yes, sir. "
Jim had looked over the two reports Sulu had made. There had been nothing unusual. He looked at the time. It was still early enough, too early to make a general statement. From his PADD, he sent a message to both Sulu and Spock.
"I have prepared a general message which I have relayed to you. When Spock goes on watch, tell him to broadcast it. "
Jim patted Sulu on the shoulder, deciding to leave.
"Thank you Sulu. Keep your eyes open. Take care of my girl while we fix her. "
The Asian smiled at him.
"I'll look after the ship, Captain. Are you going straight to the Engineering Department ? "
Jim nodded, then left the upper deck.
He dropped his PADD in his quarters and took off his Captain's shirt. Like the others, he would be helping out in the Machineries, and it was far too hot there. He took only his communicator with him and stuffed himself with a protein bar on the way, just to get something in his stomach.
When Jim arrived, Adelaide Lawton was still coordinating the teams, replacing Scotty. He introduced himself to the blonde.
"Ada, how can I help? "
The blonde looked up from the reactor control consoles. The last time Jim had found himself using them was when Khan had torpedoed the Enterprise. He unconsciously held back as she turned to him, looking stern.
"Find yourself a 7.7 soldering iron for trellium-D, we've got electro-plasma conduits whose repairs won't hold. Go to Yoren for the materials and meet Kera on maintenance platform 4. She'll give you specific instructions. "
Jim couldn't help but smile at her firm authority.
"Aye, aye, Lieutenant. "
The young woman smiled at him and Jim followed her orders to the letter. When he reached the maintenance platform, he was met with a wall of hot air.
"Oh ! Where is this heat coming from? "
Jim had just joined four engineers. Or at least, people who had come to help. Kera pointed to his head, removing his protective mask as his face was blackened with soot.
"The fusion chamber is working again, but not the cooling system. We had to shut everything down again, but the heat is still there. What are you doing here, Captain? "
The Bajoran was genuinely surprised. Jim showed her his equipment, which he plugged in.
"I'm useless on the upper deck at the moment. I don't claim to have much engineering knowledge, but I'm pretty good with my hands. I'm under your command. "
Kera smiled at him.
"If I had known this day would come! We're reinforcing the entire main duct. You may resume next to Shura. "
Jim nodded and took his place next to the African, an engineering ensign. He could get advice on his maneuvers. He equipped himself with protective gear and began his task.
Jim did not see the time pass. If he had to give an idea, he could not have answered. All he knew was that his communicator rang several times as he worked on the conduits in their section. Sulu called him once to warn him about the post office on the upper deck, Bones called him twice, once to give him a report and the second time to give him a heads up, and the last call, was Spock. To ask where he was. As if Spock had the real need to call him to get the information.
While he had expected a visit from Spock after the call, it was not to be. Or so it seemed to him. His team had time to finish reinforcing the conduits and move to another section before the Commander visited. Jim had even forgotten about him. When he felt a hand on his ankle while he was under the conduits, he gasped in surprise.
"Damn it! "
He knew it was Spock. He knew it the instant he touched him. He pulled himself out of the ducts to stand upright and removed his mask and goggles.
"You startled me, Spock! "
He had to raise his voice because of the noise.
"You didn't hear my first call, Captain. "
Spock also raised his voice. Jim gestured to him to move away from the noise so they could hear each other without shouting.
"You made the announcement? "
Spock shook his head negatively.
"I was coming to talk to you about it. I think it would be more appropriate for you to make the announcement. "
Jim scratched the back of his neck. It was soaked from the heat. In fact, it was sweaty and black from the heat and the welding.
"I thought it would be better if it were you. You have better self-control than I do. I don't want my anxiety to reach the crew. "
Despite the noise around them, they kept their distance. Even with his arm outstretched, Jim couldn't touch him without moving. Not that he had the urge.
"You're the Captain. The crew will be more reassured to hear from you, I'm sure. "
Jim looked into Spock's eyes. His certainty made him feel better. Jim nodded.
"Very well. "
He walked past the Vulcan and down to the main engineering deck to a communications terminal.
"What happened to your uniform top? "
Spock nodded at Jim's black top that revealed his bare arms down to his shoulders.
"I ripped the sleeves. It's hot as hell in here. "
Jim reached the bollard. He reached the main deck.
"Sulu, this is Kirk. Open the general intercom, I'll put in a word. "
"Aye, sir. Intercom open. "
Jim glanced at Spock before taking a breath and beginning:
"Your Attention please, this is Captain Kirk. For the past few days we have been experiencing the violent passage of magnetic storms. The night before, we experienced powerful lightning strikes that damaged the Enterprise. In order to make the necessary repairs, we were forced to stop the engines. We are drifting towards the heart of the Nebula. While our situation is not critical and we are out of danger, we are no longer in a Federation-controlled zone. Stay on alert. Kirk out. "
He turned off the intercom and sighed. Jim had found himself not very reassuring in his speech. He should have read what he had prepared in writing, but he hadn't thought of it. He sighed again.
"It's a good thing we told them before all this that we'd be stopping over on Filandria. It won't hurt the crew, and the Enterprise can get back on her feet. "
Spock did not reply. Jim was not bothered by his silence, he was used to monologue.
"Are the communications up and running? "
The Vulcan nodded.
"Perfectly, Captain. "
Jim nodded.
"I'll contact the Federation station on Filandria and inform them of our situation. They can prepare what we need. "
Spock nodded in agreement. Jim walked back to his station.
"Did you take a break? "
Jim opened his mouth, then closed it again. He was about to say he had two coffees, but that wasn't the kind of break Spock was talking about.
"No. But I can't just quit my job. "
He was slightly defensive.
"Your job is to be the Captain. "
Spock's words had the effect of a slap in the face. Because it was the truth. Jim should be on the main deck, and Spock, with his engineering skills, should be in his place. He could help manage the repairs. Jim gritted his teeth.
"Be available for repairs here in half an hour. Find a solution for the outside generator that doesn't require outside intervention. "
"Yes, sir. "
Spock left the room. Jim returned to the conduits.
Ashamed, he took his place and returned to his quarters, Spock's words echoing in his head. He wasn't acting like a captain. Spock was taking on that role. For a while now, he had been giving him more than enough relief. Jim was an extra weight in that chair. Spock was far more up to the task than he was, and he had the extra experience and knowledge.
Jim took a shower to clean himself of all the accumulated grime. The time indicated that it was the middle of the afternoon and his stomach reminded him that he was no longer on Tarsus IV. He went to the officers' mess and replenished himself with a hearty meal, which he ate while consulting his PADD. He knew that by this time Spock had already gone to the Machineries to help.
He took the opportunity to send a message to Scotty for a complete list of the equipment they would need to make the repairs and parts changes on Filandria. He then carefully read Spock's report on the ship debris and his expertise on it. These were not warships. At least the scouts had some firepower, but it would be no match for the Enterprise's deflectors. Jim hoped that without news of their scouts, the Remans wouldn't try to come.
He then consulted the reports from Chekov's team, which had gathered with other navigators to cross-reference the data from the Nebula and calculate a safer course for them once the ship got its reactor back online. According to Chekov, their slowness helped the calculations and allowed them to better locate the storm centers. Jim never thought in his life that the supposedly impossible space storm events would cause him so much trouble. Between Nero and this story...
Jim finished his meal and returned to his quarters. First he had to tell Starfleet what had happened to them, then contact their repair base and keep his logbook up to date. After that, he would have a whole bunch of administrative demands to deal with. He couldn't let Spock do that kind of work, even if Spock had the skills. He was the Captain, he had to take responsibility.
The first person he contacted was Admiral McLaren, the head of Starfleet Command in San Francisco. Jim had been introduced to him at his promotion to Rear Admiral by Pike. The two had served together in the war against the Klingon Empire. If Jim got along well with some of the heads of Starfleet's high command, it was because Pike had always believed in him. He knew that his impulsiveness and recklessness gave him a bad name, but Jim wasn't going to change for the sake of the other admirals. It wasn't in his character to kiss ass.
Fortunately for him, McLaren was one of the people he didn't have to. He managed to reach him without any problems and explained his situation. McLaren even offered to send the USS Mistral to help him, but Jim declined. The Mistral was on the other side of their Quadrant and he didn't want Arcturian Captain Hollis Minara to take any unnecessary risks in coming to their rescue. The Enterprise was a Constitution-class ship, and his girl had it under her hull. They'd make it.
On Filandria, the base easily had everything they needed for the repairs. Jim had noticed that in the list Scotty had given him, the engineer had taken the liberty of asking for thicker, and therefore more expensive, transparent aluminum, but he had pretended he hadn't seen it. He knew his chief engineer and he could let that kind of move slide. After all, Scotty was the only one who saw the Enterprise the way he did.
When Jim had finished his communications, he turned to the administrative side of things. The procedures were long, boring and headaches. He decided to take a break and have dinner with Bones to take his mind off things. He went to the infirmary and saw Bones coming out with his first aid kit. Jim frowned as he followed suit.
"Problem? "
Bones sighed.
"I've been called to the repair bay, Keenser got electrocuted. Nothing serious, apparently. "
Jim's eyes widened as they entered the turbolift.
"What? How is that even possible? "
Bones shook his head.
"I'm not even trying to figure it out anymore. Why did you want to see me? "
"Uh, for dinner, if you're interested. "
The doctor slapped his back.
"It's a deal! In private, you have some things to tell me. "
"What do you mean? "
The turbolift doors opened and Bones' answer was drowned out by the noise. Scotty was waiting for them, and he grabbed the doctor's sleeve and pulled him close to the small, bulbous-eyed alien. Jim stood back as Bones examined him.
Unconsciously, he scanned the area. Spock had to be around. He was probably in the middle of repairs and if he'd had a hand in it, he wondered if he'd come out with his haircut neat or matted. And without knowing why, he remembered the feel of Spock's body against his own. In the first storm. Jim would sell his soul to feel that again.
And that's when he saw him. Spock, in the distance, returning from the transformation chamber. His hair was slightly untidy, his face and clothes were sooty black. He was handsome as hell. He imagined running his hand through his hair, wiping the soot from his face as he touched his skin, brushing his lips.
"Captain? "
Jim snapped out of his thoughts, feeling his cheeks heat up as he felt like he was caught in the act.
"Yes, Scotty? "
He forced himself to look normal and looked at his chief engineer as if nothing had happened.
"Are you all right? You're all red. "
If Jim's cheeks could get any redder, they did right now, the heat rising to his ears.
"Yeah, it's just hot in here. "
Scotty rubbed the back of his neck.
"We've fixed the cooling system, but the temperature's still having a hard time coming down. "
Bones straightened up.
"Yeah, we felt it when we came in. Keenser's got nothing. He's tougher than a rock. As long as he doesn't have a cold... "
Scotty leaned toward the man concerned:
"You hear that, little guy? You're lucky you didn't get hurt! "
Bones shook his head and walked out the door, with Jim in tow. As soon as they were alone in the corridors, Bones said:
"So, you and Spock? "
And Jim knew Bones knew.
Jim hadn't taken his eyes off his potato salad since they had moved into his quarters. He could feel Bones' heavy gaze on him.
"So, are you going to spill the beans? "
Jim sighed.
"What do you want me to say? "
The doctor shook his head.
"I know you, Jim. I've noticed how you look at Spock. "
He raised his head to look at Bones.
"You're imagining things for nothing. It's temporary. "
Bones shook his head and smiled. Jim didn't like that kind of smile he had.
"Temporary ? I don't think even you believe that. You're not going to convince anyone of that. It's clear that there's something going on between you and Spock. It has nothing to do with friendship. Or maybe I need to get worried and reconsider my best friend status ! "
Jim leaned back on his plate, thinking. It was true that the relationship he had with Spock was very special, from his point of view anyway. He didn't know how Spock saw it.
"It's just that we know each other well, I guess. We have a good dynamic. "
Bones took his head in his hands, shook it, and looked at him again.
"Jim. You're the only one who can see or spot emotions in Spock. I'm telling you. And he clearly doesn't belong in sickbay every time I examine you ! Well, sometimes I ask him to bring you, but he doesn't have to stay. Spock cares about you, and he's the only one who can talk sense into you when I can't. Why do you think I'm sending you to him ? "
Jim realized all of Bones' maneuvers, every time he advised him to go talk to him, or sent Spock to him. He had believed the arguments he had given.
"What's your point, Bones? "
Jim stared at the doctor. The latter was not at all intimidated by his steady gaze.
"You have feelings for Spock. "
The officer's gaze turned black.
"I'm the Captain. Spock is the Commander. I can't have feelings for him. "
Bones grimaced.
"But you do have feelings for him. "
Jim thought back to all those thoughts he'd had, all those emotions he should never have felt for his XO that had nothing to do with friendship. There was no point in denying it. He held his head in his hands for a few seconds.
"I can handle it. "
"What if Spock decides otherwise? What if he finds out? You know as well as I do how Spock is with the rules. "
He never broke any rules. Well, he would sometimes cover for him when he broke the first directive, but to break those kinds of rules... it could cost them their careers. And if they couldn't work together anymore, Jim would never ask Spock to leave. He'd rather leave the Enterprise, even if it meant tearing his life apart. He sighed.
"What the hell have I gotten myself into... "
Bones grimaced.
"Let's just say you have a knack for getting yourself into unlikely situations. How do you plan to handle the situation? "
For now, it didn't stop them from working together. As long as it worked...
"As long as we stay professional at work, the rest doesn't matter. If we really can't separate the two, then... I'll look at it another way. "
In Jim's mind, it would end with him quitting his job. He would take it upon himself, he could. There was a moment of silence during which they ate, deep in thought. Bones resumed later:
"Have you heard from your stalker? "
Jim sighed heavily.
"I'd forgotten about that. Do you know how many reports and messages I'm getting these days? Tons of them. I only check the most urgent ones. "
Bones uncorked the bottle of whiskey he had brought and poured them two glasses.
"When it calms down, you'll have to deal with this story quickly before it gets any bigger. "
The blond nodded.
"I know that, Bones. I'll do this right, I don't want any Starfleet member to see their career derailed by a harassment complaint. I want to try the dialogue. "
The doctor shook his head.
"You're too nice a person, Jim. You know what they say: « too good »..."
" « Too stupid. » I know. I already paid for it with Tony. "
Jim took several sips of whiskey at the memory of the Hermes project he'd had and which had flown out from under his nose with his ex. Bones did the same, probably at the memory of that awful time. He shook his head as he put his glass down.
"Just goes to show, even a genius can be fooled easily. "
Jim swung his foot into Bones' shin.
"Hey! "
Jim crossed his arms.
"You've earned it. And you're going to have to spend some time with Christine. "
"Yeah, I'd ask you for advice, but you're a heartbreaker when it comes to lasting relationships. And I want to do it right with Christine. "
Bones grabbed the bottle of whiskey.
"Well, I always get a kick out of talking to you! "
Jim pushed his glass forward and Bones poured their drinks.
"This is to keep you from getting a big head. "
They toasted with a smile.
"Thank you, Bones. "
"At your service, Jim. "