"What, are you scared of fireworks?" Shisui said, wrinkling his nose at Kokoa. "A tough ninja who's always hanging around Itachi, and that's what makes you jump?" He pointed up behind him, fireworks soaring high—boom—falling away like glitter in the night sky.
"I'm not afraid of the fireworks," Kokoa said. She stuck her tongue out. "The sound of the first one caught me off guard, is all."
"Off guard? Do that outside of Konoha, and you're dead on the spot."
"Shisui, really?" Itachi folded his arms over his chest, watching his friends go back and forth.
"I'm being honest is all, Tachi. Gotta make sure she can handle herself in the real world," Shisui said. "You know, Kokoa, you're too nice."
"Too nice?" she repeated. "Am I too nice, Itachi-san?" She turned to him. He bit his tongue, his turn to feel caught off guard.
"It's not a bad thing," he said.
"So I am? Unbelievable. I've been working on my mean face, you know. It's bad enough that enemies don't take me seriously because I'm a kunoichi. Now you're both telling me I'm too nice?"
"I thought it was obvious. Maybe you're not cut out to be a shinobi," Shisui said, throwing his arms apart and shaking his head. Itachi gave him another annoyed glance.
"Being too nice doesn't determine whether or not someone should become a ninja," Itachi said. "We have rules, yes, but maybe we all eventually have to find our own path." Itachi twisted his mouth afterwards. Kokoa must think him a hypocrite. One minute he was scolding her for being too naive and unwilling to face the harsh reality of the lives they led as shinobi, the next, he was telling her how her compassion set her apart from others and that she'd find her way when the time came.
"Says the guy whose father has been grooming him since he slid out of his mother's womb. Own path? Since when, Itachi? Maybe Kokoa's got a chance, but for us Uchiha, it's not so easy. It's all written for us." Shisui waved a hand across the sky as if he could see it all laid out before him.
"I'm just saying, Kokoa's kindness isn't a weakness," he said, deciding to build her up this time. Itachi grabbed her sleeve, getting her attention. "I know I've tried toughening you up in the past, Kokoa, but your heart is your greatest strength. Don't let anyone tell you otherwise."
Another set of fireworks crackled through the night. That time, Kokoa did not jump. She punched Shisui's upper arm to prove her point. Firework stars fell over the festival, red and orange and yellow, bright and beautiful.
The explosion took out much of the area, fire roaring beside the trees, great flames of red and orange, hot, hot, hot. Kokoa groaned, the impact of hitting the ground along with Itachi's weight on her, it all hurt and knocked the wind from her lungs. A brief ringing blared in her ears as she sat up on her knees. Coughing, she looked over when she saw Itachi stand, his cloak billowing in the wind.
"Stand up," he said, his back to her. He eyed the trees, and in a flash found their surprise visitor.
"So, the rumors are true, after all. This is where you ended up," the strange shinobi spoke again, pointing his tanto blade in Kokoa's direction. Her stomach churned at the sight of his Anbu mask marked in red.
"That's him," she told Itachi. "The Anbu, the Root shinobi who's been keeping tabs on me since the day you left Konoha." She moved to Itachi's side. Itachi said nothing and kept watching Zaji with his high ponytail and his beige cloak.
"It's been a long time since we've been able to chat. Now we can catch up," Zaji said.
"I have no intention of speaking to you," Kokoa said. "That was then. Things were different. I've made my choices. I'm done with you Konoha dogs."
"Watch your mouth," he said, his voice sharp, tone belittling. "You're no longer within the safety of your friends in Konohagakure. Out here, it's my law, Kuroki Kokoa. Or, perhaps I should call you the Bitch of the Uchiha. You spent a portion of your life catering to the needs of a fragile and unstable Uchiha Sasuke out of guilt, and you've devoted the latter years of your life to chasing after his criminal brother. And for what? A good fuck? On your hands and knees for him, going so far as to join the Akatsuki, so he looks in your direction? Remembers you exist? What is it, Kokoa? Throw it all away for a rogue S-rank. Must be your type, come to think of it. Where is Uchiha Sasuke now? Deserted the village to crawl into Orochimaru's den of all people. Think you can take both Uchiha's at once? What a sight that'd be."
Kokoa stood silent, her eyes large, mouth agape. What had gotten into Zaji. Rather, what was he trying to do? Get a reaction out of her? She was shocked, that's for sure. Speechless. Ashamed, because there was truth to his rant.
"Two Akatsuki right in front of me. I haven't forgotten you're here, Itachi, if you were concerned. Right now, my focus is Kokoa," Zaji said. "You know how things work." He locked eyes with Itachi for a moment. The only reaction he could pull from the Uchiha was the slightest flinch of his fingers at his side, but Zaji couldn't even see that.
"What do you want from me," Kokoa said at last. "This, you and I, it ends today. Here."
"You're too dangerous now. Abandoned Konoha. Abandoned Suna. Running around with information. Running around with Akatsuki. Running around with him. " He glanced at Itachi again. "I'm going to kill you, Kuroki Kokoa, by order of Shimura Danzo. Just as I killed Kuroki Akihiko all those years ago, by order of Danzo-sama."
That's all it took.
"You? It was you?" Kokoa raised a hand to point at Zaji up in the tree. "You killed Akihiko? You stabbed my father in the back?"
"And your mother, if it's any consolation. They went one after the other. Not enough time to mourn."
"You son of a bitch." Without warning and without intending to, Kokoa's gray chakra flared, covering every inch of her body. She recalled her conversation with Akihiko years ago in her dark prison cell. He was on a mission. Tricked. Struck down by another Konoha ninja, an Anbu in a mask, when all Akihiko was trying to do was build a home for his wife and daughter after losing it so many times. Everything about Kokoa changed. Her demeanor, her voice, the look in her eyes. Itachi swore under his breath.
"And tormenting me all these years? Was that just for fun?" she said. Zaji laughed into his mask.
"Just a little," he said.
"Kokoa," Itachi warned. "This isn't a good idea. Needless fighting will drain our chakra and delay us." He meant what he said. They did still have a mission to serve, after all, but Itachi wasn't sure what Zaji was capable of either. He was one of Danzo's men. Danzo—the man, the snake, the monster—who'd ruined everything for Kokoa, for Itachi. Cornered them. Broke them down bit by bit. Stripped them of their homes, their love, their freedom. Itachi clenched his fists at his sides. Kokoa showed no sign of backing down.
"I'm going to kill you," she said, still pointing at Zaji. "I'm going to stand over you and watch the life leave your eyes. I can't wait to crack that mask and look upon your wretched face, you dog. Everything you've done to me, everyone you've taken from me, I will have my vengeance. Keep talking your big talk. I'll swallow it down and come at you three times as hard. It ends now."
She looked to her right at Itachi.
"I have to fight my fight. You've always looked after me. And if it wasn't you, it was Kakashi, or Sasuke, or someone. I have to fight my fight, Itachi-san. Don't get in my way."
Itachi sucked in a deep breath, eyeing the pebbles at his feet before finally facing her.
"I won't." It was the least he could do. "Kokoa, these men, Danzo, they've had their eyes on you for far longer than you think. Remember, it's not just about your history with me. Your father was also a problem. Don't underestimate the things they may know." He formed a seal and vanished before her very eyes. He was close. She knew he wouldn't leave. He trusted her to do what she needed. She knew that.
"How polite of him to give us our privacy," Zaji said. He gripped the tree where he stood. Whether Itachi truly did leave, lingered in the shadows, or went back to get reinforcements, he couldn't tell. Zaji would have to act quick. Fighting Kokoa was one thing. Taking on Uchiha Itachi was another.
Zaji was light on his feet. He was skilled in taijutsu, liked using his sword when he could, and liked casting genjutsu to muddle his enemies minds a bit before sneaking up for the final blow.
"You're still as fast as they say. Perhaps even more so now," he said, engaging Kokoa in hand-to-hand combat. She didn't speak, focused on dodging and hitting, the knot in her throat tight. Every hit—every kick, strain, grunt—for Akihiko. Otou-san. For herself. I am Kuroki Kokoa.
Kokoa had no interest in reading Zaji's heart. She didn't need her abilities to know what kind of a man and shinobi he was. She only needed to fight. But when the air thickened and clouds gathered and rain began to fall, she realized the fighting was about to get harder. Zaji disappeared in the rain he summoned, his laughter filling Kokoa's ears. From the empty space in front of her, a set of water bullets whirled in her direction. She dodged, retreated, and took a minute to think. She'd never fought Anbu before. She knew nothing about Zaji, only just now learning he could use water release and hide himself well. Stealth. That was his strength. Hiding. Distance. Surprise. Finish the job.
Kokoa clicked her tongue. What kind of a ninja was she? Taijutsu, she thought, unless a master like Gai or his genius student, Rock Lee, could only get her so far. Sure, there was the chakra her father left her that only recently began showing itself, that heavy chakra that seeped from her core, flared like fire, and sometimes protected her. The chakra she still didn't know how to harness. It came and went on its own, rising and falling with her emotions. And fine, she had her kekkei genkai, but in a battle like this, Kokoa wasn't going to read Zaji's heart. And with Itachi's seal, she couldn't read his thoughts. What good am I for? What can I do? Why am I never enough?
She clenched her fists, grit her teeth, stomped her foot. What was Kokoa to do?
"Open. Her left."
Kokoa whipped around and leapt back. That same gray chakra rushed out and intercepted another round of water bullets.
"Quick."
"What game are you playing?" Kokoa called. "Announcing things. What kind of fool do you take me for?" She put a hand to her temple to ease the throbbing she felt come on suddenly.
Zaji didn't say anything, still hiding in his jutsu. As Kokoa looked ahead, trying to locate him, the land before her warped, morphing to something else. A field she didn't recognize. She saw a group of Konoha shinobi, and among them, a face she did recognize. Akihiko. Kokoa knew it was a genjutsu. He wasn't there, yet she couldn't help but throw out an arm and yell to him.
"Move! Otou-san! Look out—" She was cut short. The blade came down. Blood spilled out. Then, Kokoa found herself at home. Her home in Konoha. A man kicked through the front door, the sleeping infant in the crib jolted awake with a wail, and Sakiko had no time to react. Down came the blade once again. Kokoa looked to her feet, shoes soaked in her own mother's blood. She heard Zaji laughing again, and on the wall above the crying baby hung his ANBU mask, splattered with blood.
Kokoa pulled at her hair, unable to speak, on the verge of giving into him. It was only genjutsu. She knew that. But it was Zaji's truth, too. She'd asked him about her parents back in Konoha. Since she wanted to know so badly, he finally let her see.
Kokoa felt herself weakened, her strong will fading, her spirit breaking, but in that moment, amongst the blood and the laughter and her mother's body lifeless on the floor, Kokoa saw a man, distorted, standing across from her. He reached into the crib, and as he picked up little Kokoa, holding and quieting her gently in his arms, her vision focused, and she saw Itachi.
Kokoa threw her head back with a gasp, filling her lungs with cold air. She glanced around her to see the genjutsu was gone. She was back where she was. Though the image of her father's murder and the thought she'd lived much of her life in the very home where her mother was struck down shook her to her core, it was Itachi holding her infant self that left her wondering. Did he help me? Did he dispel the genjutsu? She looked around. The Uchiha was nowhere in sight, but Zaji finally did show himself. He eyed their surroundings. Kokoa could tell something about him was off. Was he nervous? Perhaps Itachi really did interfere. She scolded herself for needing help, but she was thankful.
"Knows too much."
Kokoa tilted her head, eyes never leaving Zaji.
"What did Itachi tell her? Danzo-sama needs her taken care of."
Kokoa set a hand over her mouth, taking slow, deep breaths to steady herself. Zaji wasn't speaking out loud to her. Earlier, too. He wasn't announcing his next move. She'd read his thoughts somehow. Broken and a little scattered, they were his thoughts, nonetheless. Itachi did tell her he didn't know the full extent of the sealing. It was a kekkei genkai, after all, trying to break free.
"Let's finish this now, Kuroki Kokoa," Zaji said.
"You're the one using my dead parents against me," she said. "I'm right here."
They charged. Kokoa was quicker than Zaji remembered. She was quicker than her father. Angrier. And no matter how long he engaged her, she didn't seem to tire. When she'd expended much of her chakra, the gray chakra Akihiko passed onto her came to life, and Zaji didn't know how or what it was, only that just when he thought he'd beat her down, Kokoa stood back up, winding up for a final blow. And he would do the same. Zaji had his tanto, Kokoa the chakra blades she'd come to love. They moved again. One last time.
Itachi moved back to the battlefield when he saw a wild blue light, almost like lightning, crackle over the area. Then followed the boom. He stopped high up in a tree and crouched low. Kokoa was on her back, her head bobbing left and right. She cried out and grunted, trying to move her body. Zaji, too, was on the ground, on his side and barely moving. With another cry, Kokoa felt that last bit of Akihiko's chakra flicker in her, enough to roll over onto her knees and then up on her feet. She dragged herself to Zaji. No ninjutsu. No chakra weapons. Just a kunai in her hand and her desire to wreak vengeance.
"Are you alive, you son of a bitch?" she said. She stuck out her leg and kicked Zaji over to his back, his mask cracked and bloody. Kokoa stood over him. She reached down and cut the back strap of his mask. It slid off his face and onto the grass. Whatever damage she'd inflicted, it was bad enough he couldn't speak. He spit in her face. Kokoa grabbed him by the chin and leaned in close.
"Whatever you have to say, go ahead, think it," she said. "I can hear you." She tapped her own head with a finger.
" I am but one cog in the machine. Kill me now, another will come if Danzo-sama wishes it."
"Yeah?" Kokoa spun the kunai in her hand. "I'll see you and Danzo in hell."
Itachi looked away. Seeing Kokoa like that made him sick to his stomach, but he knew it was necessary, and it meant one less threat on their tail. He gave her a few minutes to grieve, but they'd have to start moving again soon. All that commotion could have caught someone's attention.
Kokoa turned to look behind her. She stepped off Zaji and wiped away the last of her tears before facing Itachi.
"So it's done?" he asked.
"It's done," she said. "Thank you, but I told you not to interfere."
"Danzo is my enemy, too. All I did was break one genjutsu. The rest was you." Itachi looked down at Zaji, at the gash across his throat and the kunai jammed into his face.
"Don't look at me like that, please," Kokoa said. "Overkill, I know, but he deserved it."
"I know." Itachi looked around them. "Let's get going," he said. Kokoa started to follow, but when she stepped forward, a severe pain rang through her, and she gasped loudly. Itachi turned back to her.
"I'm all right," Kokoa said. "I just feel a little faint." She kept wiping the sweat from her face with the back of her hand, and when it became too much, she shoved her hands into her messy hair, pulling tight in hopes the pain would ground her a bit. But she kept fading. She set her hands on her hips afterwards, fighting for a deep breath, and when she moved them away, Itachi snatched her by the sleeve to turn her hand over.
"Kokoa," he said, "you're bleeding." He showed her, her bloodied palm. She began to panic, feeling along her body until she found the tear in her cloak and the deep gash on her left side below her ribs near the scar she received years ago as a new jonin when her teammate died and she landed herself in the hospital. But this was worse. Much worse.
"I don't feel well, Itachi-san," she said, her hands trembling and soaked in red.
"He must have hit you at the very end without you noticing," Itachi said. "We have to stop the bleeding." The longer they stood there, the more Itachi began to realize the gravity of the situation. If he didn't figure something out soon, Kokoa could die.
Kokoa leaned over, her hands on her knees, trying to stay present by focusing on the sound of tearing fabric.
"Come," Itachi said. He took a fistful of her clothes, and in one hard pull, tore a hole in her cloak and the shirt underneath, exposing the nasty wound. He took the pieces he'd just torn off the sleeves of his own cloak and pressed them to her side, pushing deep into the gash. Kokoa's knees nearly gave out from the pain.
"Direct pressure," he told her. "If blood soaks through, keep it on. I'll give you more. Just keep the pressure. Understand?" He replaced his hands with hers, showing her how hard to push.
"Kokoa, do you understand?" he said when she didn't answer. "Kokoa, can you hear me?" he said, panic beginning to show in his voice. She looked at him, hearing his instructions but not much else. She finally nodded. Itachi looked around again, scanned their surroundings. They were out in the middle of nowhere, in the open, sitting ducks for whomever had issue with Akatsuki. The wind whipped and crows cawed and the sight of Kokoa's blood on his hands drove Itachi to the brink of despair—hands shaking, chest tight, the memory of his parents' blood, their bodies and broken hearts splayed across the floor of the family home because it was my fault, my fault, my fault —
"We have to get out of here," he said. He couldn't bear to see it happen again. Not Kokoa.
"Not so fast," someone spoke just as Itachi looped Kokoa's arm around him and secured her. Itachi clenched his fists, he dragged a foot through the dirt, all of him tight.
"Now is not the time, Kakashi-san," he said. Kakashi stood before the Akatsuki pair on guard and was taken aback by the scene.
"It isn't what you think," Itachi said, as if he didn't want Kakashi to think he'd actually hurt Kokoa. It was strange, but Itachi couldn't take back his words. Kakashi saw Zaji's body off to the left, the knife sticking out of his face. He looked back at the pair.
"Your Konoha friend came after her again. Kokoa repaid him for all he's done to her, is all," Itachi said. "But not without injury, which is why we must go. If you'll excuse us, Kakashi-san." Itachi set a hand over Kokoa's, helping apply pressure to the wound.
"I'm well aware of what Danzo's Root shinobi have done to Kokoa," Kakashi said. "I noticed him earlier as I was making my way home from my own assignment. It was odd, seeing him out this far and alone. I knew it had to be Kokoa. No one has heard from her in a long time, and the rumors that she's joined Akatsuki have reached everyone across the five nations."
"I said my goodbye in Suna," Kokoa said, her voice weak and hoarse. She gripped Itachi's shoulder to stand up straighter. "I made my choice, Kakashi. I told you not to come." Kakashi all the way out here at the same time as Zaji? Coincidence? Kokoa looked at him. He wasn't trying to find her after everything, was he?
"You can still come back. You're injured. I can help. Come home," Kakashi said. Regardless of what Kokoa wanted, she was in no condition to take action. She would stay with Itachi, or Kakashi would drag her back to the village. Those were the options. And as he weighed those options, Itachi found himself tightening his hold on Kokoa. If Kakashi took her back, how long before they threw her in jail or tortured her or killed her? They wanted her dead like her father. They wanted her dead so she'd stop sticking her nose where it didn't belong in regards to the Uchiha massacre. Kakashi only had so much say. Danzo was the one in power. And if by some chance, Kokoa lived, she wouldn't stay in Konoha. Everyone knew that. She would find her way back to Itachi. She always did. Even though Itachi wanted her happiness and safety, what good would handing her over to the Copy Ninja do now? It was too late. It would cause more harm than good. More betrayal on his part. But if he kept her with him, he could keep an eye on her, just like Kisame told him time and time again. If more of Danzo's men would come after her, Itachi could protect her. If she was going to keep coming back to him regardless of everything he said and did, then why not let her stay? Why not be selfish just this once, Uchiha Itachi, and keep the one thing you've yearned for all these years?
"You think you're protecting her by keeping her away, but perhaps it's by you where she's safest, Itachi."
"It's not a matter of if she comes, Itachi. It's when."
Kisame was right all along.
"I have the situation under control," Itachi said, despite feeling the blood soak through the fabric and their hands.
"You pushed her away every time she came after you. You spat in her face. Ridiculed her. Now you want her?" Kakashi said, still unsure what to think of Itachi and his motives and the way he held Kokoa close to him, the look in his eyes giving away how willing he'd be to fight anyone who charged them.
"The circumstances are a little different this time, Kakashi-san," Itachi said. "I had no use for Kokoa then, but now that she's voluntarily offered herself up to Akatsuki, our superior has taken an interest in her and her abilities. You can understand that. And until she proves her loyalty and he can rely on her, she's been assigned to me, given our history and the fact I know how to stop her if it comes to it. You can understand that, too, I'm sure."
"You should have let her go, Itachi. She didn't deserve any of this. All of her suffering, it's because of you," Kakashi said. Angrily, Itachi pushed against Kokoa's wound without meaning to. She whined, gripping and releasing his cloak in her fist.
"I left Konoha. What Kokoa decided to do and feel was all on her," Itachi said.
"You owed her closure. Peace. She was a kind girl, and you dragged her down with you. She could have found happiness again. She could have learned to live again, Itachi, and to love-"
"Who, Kakashi-san?" Itachi said, holding his gaze. "You?" Itachi bit his tongue. Kokoa deserved a normal life. He wanted her to move on, but now, looking at the man she could have had a future with if things were different, he couldn't stand the idea. It made him insecure, and it made him want to weep.
"Enough!" Kokoa shouted. "Men, the two of you arguing over me like I'm not even here. I chose to join the Akatsuki, Kakashi-san. I'll pay the price. But until my time comes, I'm not going anywhere without hearing Itachi's truth. That is my final decision. This is my last goodbye." Kokoa hung her head, immense sadness filling her chest—Kakashi's true feelings. Naruto mentioned it before, the possibility of something more blossoming between the two. Kokoa felt it months ago, the last time they spoke before she left Sunagakure. But when it came to Kakashi's feelings, she always looked the other way, because it scared her. She didn't want it, and the guilt ate away at her.
"I can't accept that answer," Kakashi said.
"I suggest you do," Itachi said. "You've made the mistake of assuming I'm a patient man. I'll only say it once more. A fight is the last thing any of us need right now. It will draw attention, Kokoa needs tended to, and I will not hold back. My duty is to keep her alive unless told otherwise." Itachi sat Kokoa on the ground. He stepped in front of her, held a hand up to his face ready to launch jutsu should Kakashi challenge him.
"It's me this time, Kakashi-san," he said. "No clones. This time, Kokoa stays with me."
"Shit." Kakashi looked at Kokoa and how she leaned over holding herself, crying in pain and fear. And then he noticed how much blood she was losing, and when he looked back to Itachi, he saw the sharingan of a true Uchiha heir staring back at him, and a little bit of something else, too. Fear? Was Itachi afraid for Kokoa's well-being? Was he concerned? Kakashi, not wanting to accept it, dropped the kunai he was holding anyway and held up his hands. Whether or not Itachi was using Kokoa like the rest of Akatuski, Kakashi knew her best chance at survival in that moment was with the Uchiha.
"You'll always be a shinobi of Konoha, Kuroki Kokoa," Kakashi said. "We'll all be there. One day, you'll come home." He started retreating. Kokoa watched him move away, her vision beginning to bend and blur. She looked up at Itachi's back.
"I am home."
When Kakashi was gone, Itachi dropped to his knees beside Kokoa. She breathed heavily, the color left her face, and the blood kept coming. He tore more fabric from his cloak, shoving it into her wound. He ripped an especially long piece and wound it around her body like a belt, pulling tight to help keep everything in place, but he knew it would only do so much. Taking her into town to a clinic was risky and perhaps even too far away at that point. He'd have to take care of her himself, but first, they needed shelter.
"Do you remember that flower you gave me, Itachi?" Kokoa spoke suddenly. Itachi ignored it. He reached over to pick her up.
"The higanbana. Spider lily," she continued. "Linked to final goodbyes. Sadness. Death. They were always my favorite."
"Shut up," Itachi said. Kokoa, even in her injured state, bleeding and mere minutes from losing consciousness, blinked in surprise.
"Conserve your strength. Shut up. That's an order," Itachi said. He picked her up, setting her over his shoulder. Kokoa struggled for a moment, trying to grab onto his back and steady herself. They started off.
Kokoa was losing her fight. She could feel herself slipping. Quick, shallow breathing. Her heart raced. Her skin felt clammy. She couldn't even bring herself to lift her head anymore, hanging off Itachi's back. For the first time, she believed she was really going to die, and it scared her. She grabbed at his cloak, holding onto him tight. If this was going to be the end, she could at least die knowing Itachi was beside her trying to help her, even if she'd never hear his truth. At least we sort of got to watch the sunset.
"Kokoa," Itachi said, "are you up?" He kept moving. She groaned into his back. He took it as a yes.
"I need you to stay awake," he said.
"I'm so tired," she said.
"We're almost there. Hold on," Itachi said more to convince himself. He stopped when a small hut came into view. It sat in a secluded area at the edge of a forest, away from the hustle and bustle of towns. It was worth a shot. When they neared the home, Itachi set Kokoa down, telling her to stay low in the tree hollow there. He sat her up against the trunk.
"I'm going to scout the area. I'll be back," he said. "Stay put."
"No. No, no, no, no, please," she said, grabbing at his torn sleeves. "Don't go. Not again."
"Stay where you are." Itachi started moving away, pulling out of her grasp. Kokoa couldn't help but cry again. All her pain, her fear, the burning in her body, the thought of Itachi leaving her again— I'm going to die alone.
"I'll be back, Kokoa. I promise."