Chapter 5 – Seeking Aid

Author's Note: In which Anakin and Ani cope. :')

~ Amina Gila

Ani can feel Anakin's regret curl around him, even as the elder wraps the Force around him soothingly. He doesn't say anything though, for which Ani is grateful. He doubts that there's anyone or anything which could make him feel better except his father. His father who the Jedi just arrested simply for protecting him. It doesn't make sense, and it contradicts everything which he's ever heard and thought about the Jedi. Why? Why did they do this?

Beneath the regret lies pain, and Ani isn't sure where his ends and Anakin's begins. It's as if they're caught in a loop, the pain they're each sensing and feeling feeding into the other. He keeps his face buried into Anakin's shoulder, crying quietly, hands clenched in the elder's robes. Anakin's protectiveness and anger are radiating strongly in the Force.

"We'll figure something out, Ani," Anakin whispers finally, shifting him. His prosthetic is wrapped tightly around Ani, allowing him to better hold the younger in his arms. Ani lifts his head slightly to see where they are. They're entering a cabin now, not the same one that Ani and his father were sharing though.

The Togruta from yesterday, Ahsoka, is here too. She enters the room, letting the door close behind them. Ani feels Anakin sit down on a chair and raises his head from the Jedi's shoulder, meeting the bright blue eyes, identical to his own, which are filled with pain. Perhaps Ani should be jealous of the strong bond which Anakin formed with his – their? – father so soon after meeting him, but he's not. He knows that their father cares about both of them equally, even if differently. Whatever burden Anakin has been, and still is, carrying, it's one which he's had for a long time, and it's apparently one which he's never shared.

"I thought the Jedi were good." Ani's voice is quiet, and he's well aware of how much emotion is audible.

"They are," Anakin replies, even as the Force whispers that he's not being entirely honest. "The Council's actions are definitely questionable in this situation, and I do not agree with them." His gaze flickers past Ani, probably falling on Ahsoka, before he looks back at him.

"But... why?" Ani asks quietly. As if sensing the pain spearing through him, Anakin pulls him nearer, holding him tightly. He snuggles closer, readily accepting the comfort, though it's not the kind he really wants right now. Ever since the Sith captured him on Naboo, ever since he escaped, his father has always been the one constant presence. He's been the one who's helped him, who's comforted him when he has nightmares – almost every night – from his time with Plagueis. He shies away from the memories, forcing himself to focus on Anakin's presence, warm and fierce and bright. It feels like his own, and it's not the one he needs.

Maybe it's childish to cry, but he can't help it. It's terrifying to be apart from his father like this, and he doesn't know what to do. He feels... lost. None of this makes sense. He recalls, vaguely, how the Force had screamed as the Sith had ripped open a wormhole, how he'd thrown up a Force shield to protect both of them, even if he hadn't known what he was doing. He'd shaken loose Sidious' grip, and he knew, in that moment, that everyone was probably going to die. Something happened. Something shifted, and the next thing he knew, both of them were in a different reality altogether.

"I don't know," Anakin sighs, looking as if he's struggling not to break down himself. "I don't know, Ani."

There's a heavy silence which settles over them, broken only when Ahsoka hesitantly approaches. "What will we do now?" she questions. She's subdued, and Ani gets the feeling that she isn't usually like that.

"What I want to do is storm the Council and demand that they release Custos," Anakin replies. Ani sinks into his embrace, refusing to let the elder go. He doesn't think he could handle being left without an anchor right now. "However, that's not really an option, so we'll have to find someone else who can help."

"Isn't – isn't it illegal for them to arrest him?" Ani asks tentatively. "He's not a Jedi. Nor am I. He – We didn't hurt anyone." He finds it hard to force the words out, constantly reminding himself that neither Anakin nor Ahsoka will hurt him for speaking. It was easier with his father, because he had learned how to read him through their bond. Verbal communication wasn't necessary between them.

There's a flare of realization and affection from Anakin. "I have an idea," he announces, sounding a little happier than he did a minute ago. "We can go talk to Padme. The Council hasn't forbidden me from taking you down to the planet or from telling anyone, so it should work. She might be able to help."

Ani feels himself brighten as well at the realization. This Padme won't be anything like the one he remembers, especially given her current friendship with Anakin, but she is still a Padme, and that's what counts, he supposes. "Okay," he agrees quietly, nestling his head back on Anakin. "When'll we go?"

"We can go now, if you want," Anakin offers, his tone betraying how eager he is to do so. He clearly doesn't want to let Ani's father be imprisoned by the Jedi any more than Ani himself does, which isn't surprising.

Ani nods in lieu of answering, and Anakin rises, standing effortlessly and shifting Ani so he can hold him more securely. "Come on, Snips," says Anakin, and Ani can't help but smirk slightly at the nickname. "We're going planet side."

"After you, Skyguy," she singsongs as they head out of the cabin.

**w**

It takes a bit of cajoling, but Ani finally agrees to settle in Ahsoka's arms while Anakin takes them down to 500 Republica in a shuttle. He's touching her lekku lightly, obviously a bit fascinated by them. It tickles, and Ahsoka resists a shiver, but she doesn't stop him either. She remembers what it was like when she first became Anakin's Padawan, when she found hair fascinating. Anakin never laughed at her for wanting to touch it, and she'll give his younger counterpart the same courtesy.

Ani remains nestled in Ahsoka's lap even as Anakin lands the shuttle. His fingertips incessantly skim over the light fuzz on her lekku as he traces her stripes. "Come on, little one," Anakin says, holding out his arms. Ani leaps into his embrace, wrapping himself around his counterpart. "Let's go." Anakin gestures to Ahsoka, and together, the three of them disembark from the shuttle and onto the landing pad.

Ahsoka can't help but reflect on the fight between Custos and Obi-Wan. She doesn't really understand what happened, though she knows that Anakin is hurting badly. So is Ani. It's almost depressing, honestly, to be with her master, feeling his pain, but at the same time, it's not as if she's willing to leave him. Anakin needs her right now, even if he hasn't explicitly said so, and she won't abandon him or Ani.

It's admittedly difficult for Ahsoka to see Ani hurting, because he's only a child. There's a haunted look in his blue eyes, one which doesn't belong there. It hurts her to see, and even if she hardly knows him, she already feels fiercely protective over him. She would kill to keep him safe, she knows. So would Anakin. For a moment, she had honestly thought that her master would attack Obi-Wan or Windu in an attempt to free Custos. If he had, she just might have joined him, because how dare they take Custos from his son? Hasn't Ani suffered enough already? Why did they have to hurt him even more?!

She is well aware that Anakin questions the Council, but she has never done likewise, at least not the way she is now. What they did is wrong. If they could act in this manner, against someone who has never harmed anyone as far as everyone knows, even if he is a self-proclaimed Sith, then what else might they be willing to justify for the greater good? Who else might they be willing to hurt? A part of her is scared to find out.

But reflecting on the limited interactions that she saw between Custos and Ani, Ahsoka realizes something. Anakin's anger regarding the situation is far too deep and personal for it to be caused by the same thing as hers: the pointless separation of a father and son. That's when it clicks, and she wonders how she didn't realize sooner. Of course, Anakin views Obi-Wan like his father because he raised him. Seeing Ani with Custos must have been a jarring reminder of what he has always wanted.

Ahsoka well knows how Anakin has always felt deeply and fiercely about people, and Obi-Wan really has no idea what he's missing. Especially towards the beginning of when she became a Padawan, Ahsoka remembers how much she'd cherished the moments when she had Anakin's full attention and affection turned on her. She'll never be able to unhear how Custos accused Obi-Wan of being manipulative, of being sanctimonious, and it's made her want to take a step back so she can relook at how Obi-Wan treats Anakin. She's never had any real examples of how a parent should treat a child, but she knows that the way Anakin treats her is very, very different from how Obi-Wan treats him.

Trying to think about this is only confusing her now, so she decides to set aside the contemplations for later, after she has time to better sit down and reflect on everything which has transpired. Anakin and Ani both need her to be attentive and present, at the moment.

Ahsoka brings her mind back to the here and now as Padme greets the three of them, eyes lingering on Ani, her Force signature radiating confusion. After they're all seated in the living room, Ani snuggled on Anakin's lap, Anakin explains everything from start to finish, though the summary is brief. Ahsoka watches Padme's reaction with no small amount of amusement, because she knows exactly how unbelievable it all sounds.

"Why would they arrest Custos?" Padme demands indignantly. "That's not right. If they really are from an alternate reality, then they have no citizenship, and being as they appeared on Naboo, they are more Nubian than they are anything else. They didn't hurt anyone. I'll put something together and issue a demand to the Jedi Council, though I cannot guarantee that they'll even take my words into consideration."

"At least you'll have tried," Anakin offers weakly. "It's better than nothing." He glances at Ahsoka. "We can speak with the Chancellor as well."

"Yes, you do that," Padme concedes with a sigh. "Can I speak with you privately?"

Ani tenses, and Ahsoka winces on his behalf, silently opening her arms in a wordless invitation while Anakin whispers something to the child. After a long minute, Ani nods, sliding onto Ahsoka's lap, winding his arms around her neck, and pressing his face against her lekku. She doesn't protest, hugging his small body against her chest. At this rate, she'll soon consider him something of a younger sibling. It's an amusing thought.

Anakin follows Padme out of the room, and Ahsoka finds herself wishing that someone else was here. The silence is too heavy, too depressing. She's not willing to try and force Ani to speak, especially when she's noticed how little he likes to do so. Maybe she can attempt talking to him though. Now that she's actually giving him her full attention, she can't help but notice how light he is, how small. He's eleven, and while she doesn't know that much about human biology, Ahsoka is quite certain that he's way too small. It's as if he's seriously malnourished and has been for a while.

That sends a surge of dread down her spine. Anakin hates talking about his past; he never does unless he's telling her he won't talk about it, and she knows that he came to the Temple when he was nearly ten. Where was he during the first ten years of his life? What happened to him? Ani isn't that much different from Anakin, all things considered, except that he's undergone a great deal of trauma in recent months. She wishes she knew everything that happened to Custos and Ani. If she did, she might be able to piece together more of Anakin's past without him ever having to talk about it.

"We'll figure something out," Ahsoka murmurs to Ani at least, feeling a bit awkward. "I – I know Anakin will do everything he can, and so will I. We'll get your father back."

"I know," Ani replies at last, voice quiet enough that even with her enhanced hearing, it's difficult to hear him. He sits back, blue eyes far dimmer than they were before. Ahsoka can see the pain lurking within them, and it hurts her to see it, to know that the Jedi are the ones who put it there.

"You are very close with him," Ahsoka observes. "I can't ever remember Anakin being like that with Obi-Wan." It's true now that she thinks about it. She can't recall a time where Anakin was being... well, clingy and openly affectionate and adoring with his former master. Maybe she's right. Maybe he does long for the chance to act on how he feels.

"He'd scold him," Ani mumbles, ducking his head back against her shoulder.

"Does it make you feel good to use him like that?"

Using him? Is Custos right? Is that what Obi-Wan's doing? Ahsoka knows that he would never intentionally hurt Anakin, not when he so clearly cares about him, but his affection is definitely given in a detached sort of way. Maybe that is the problem. She really should try talking to Anakin about it, although it's unlikely that he'd be willing to open up to her. And Ani said that Obi-Wan would scold him... which he would. He's a good Jedi Master, and he would never indulge Anakin's blatant need for... attachment.

Ugh. This is all so complicated. Sometimes, like right now, Ahsoka seriously detests the Jedi's views on attachments and close relationships. Anakin struggles, she knows, but he still manages to succeed. He's able to love deeply and fiercely without falling victim to his inability to let his loved ones live their lives as they see fit; as least from what she's seen about him that's true. Anakin doesn't treat others in a detached, distant manner like the rest of the Jedi. That's why she admires him so much.

"Skywalkers are always so complicated," Ahsoka decides aloud, "But they are also the best." She's proud of the fact that she coaxes a small smile from Ani, one which she feels more than sees. Maybe her and Anakin will be able to help Ani, so he's not entirely miserable until the unknown day when Custos is finally freed. She can only hope.

Final Notes: If you want to join our Discord to receive updates or just hang out, here's the invite link, and please delete the spaces! :) discord . gg / nqSxuz2

We also have a tumblr account (and delete the spaces): fanfictasia . tumblr . com

And! We have a YT channel for tributes! Please delete the spaces in the link. :D youtube channel / UC_g1M5rSCxJUzQCRS29B6pA

Finally, if you're interested, you can submit a SW gift fic request via the following form (delete the spaces): forms . gle / rmXWtRomMMaULuPa6