Chapter 8 – Distractions

Author's Note: In which Anakin and Ani try to cope. :')

~ Amina Gila

Ahsoka shifts, raising her head off the back of the couch as Padme enters the room. It's been at least two or three hours since the Senator left to try and resolve the situation regarding Custos. In that time, Anakin and Ani moved to the couch, the latter of whom is finally dozing, head resting on Ahsoka's shoulder. She doesn't want to disturb him. Anakin is oddly still, staring blankly at the opposite wall. He's hardly even moved, and it's unnerving to see. Usually, he's always active, and seeing him in this state of apathy worries her.

She wishes that she could say something, do something to shake some life back into him. It feels as if she's losing him slowly, second by second. If only she understood what he was thinking. His past has always been mysterious, now so especially, and she – she can't help him if she doesn't know what she has to help him with. Maybe Padme could shed some light on the situation, but Ahsoka doubts that she'd be willing to divulge anything without Anakin's consent. She'll have to talk to her master.

"Well?" Ahsoka queries, looking at Padme.

Anakin shifts for what seems like the first time, turning towards the Senator. He seems to remain distant though as their bond is clouded and blocked off. Ahsoka doesn't like not being able to feel him; she doesn't like when she can't sense his presence in the back of her head at all times. It's a testament to how close they've become, to how much she cares about him. It might be attachment, but she doesn't care.

"I sent the petition to the Council through Obi-Wan, marked important an hour ago," Padme tells them. Ahsoka already knows the outcome from the look on her face. She seems frustrated, though not defeated. She won't give up, even if there's not much else which she can do. Yet. "He responded that the Council refuses to hear anything pertaining to Custos because it's an internal matter."

Maybe that's part of the reason why Obi-Wan called Ahsoka over an hour ago. She turned her comm to silent after that, completely ignoring the call. It's not as if there's anything for her to say to him. If something urgent comes up, Rex will contact them – her, actually, because Anakin's comm is still off. She understands his need for quiet. After everything which just happened, he doesn't need anyone or anything else to stress him.

She forces herself to remain calm at the news, even if she really wants to scream right now. If she becomes agitated, Ani will pick it up, because of his sensitivity, and he'll awaken. He needs the rest. There's a flare of anger from Anakin before it's smothered. "I'm not even surprised," he grinds out. The depth of his anger takes Ahsoka off guard, and she'll admit to being worried about him. "The Council has grown complacent, arrogant, unwilling to look at any view but their own. They're wrong!"

He sounds so furious, so defiant, it nearly scares her. Anakin doesn't – he isn't like this normally. He doesn't stand up and fight back against the Council. He's… passive. The second she realizes that, something clicks in her head, and she wonders how she didn't realize sooner. He is passive. He doesn't resist Obi-Wan or the Council, not like he is now. It's not simply out of respect; it's how he is, which is strange in and of itself, because she's not like that and nor are any of the other Jedi she knows. So, why is Anakin?

He has always been different. It's one of the reasons why she's long admired and looked up to him. But in the end, she gives up trying to puzzle out the mystery. She's missing far too many pieces to put together a cohesive story, and she doesn't want to wrongly interpret her master's past. There's something there, teasing the edges of her consciousness, but she can't make sense of whatever it is, so she focuses instead on Anakin.

"They could kill him, claiming it's for the 'greater good,' and not even care that it would do more harm than anything else," Anakin continues. He's shaking from suppressed rage.

His anger is, Ahsoka is quite certain, not entirely focused on the Jedi Council. Learning that the Chancellor, with whom he was close friends, is a Sith can't be easy for him. If she's being honest, she had wondered what prompted Palpatine to spend so much time with Anakin. Even though she's only a Padawan, she had still found it bizarre. There's only one thing that makes sense, one reason why a Sith – Custos doesn't count – would take such an interest in Anakin: he wants to turn him. A chill runs through her, because she realizes that, had they not met Custos and Ani, she has no way of knowing if Palpatine's plans would have succeeded. The truth is painful to admit, but she had to concede that the chances are probably high.

After all, Palpatine has likely spent decades working on his plans, setting events into motion so as to put himself into a position of power before arranging so that the Clone Wars would begin. From there, it's only a matter of time before the galaxy completely descends into chaos. What failsafe does the Sith Master have? How can he be assured of his victory? Even if, for some unfathomable reason, Anakin joined him, he alone is not nearly strong enough to destroy the Jedi. Two Sith in the face of an entire Order would be overrun, so what is Sidious planning? What has he already crafted without their knowledge?

Something pained flickers across Padme's face. "I don't think they would go that far," she tries to reassure Anakin, "And the only other thing I can do is get other Senators involved. The Chancellor has enough emergency power to give the Council an order, though they are not required to listen, and doing something else with the Senate would take time."

"Time which we don't have," Ahsoka chimes in, shivering.

Ani and Anakin are wrecks after spending mere hours away from Custos, so what would happen to them if he was executed? It's not something she even wants to consider. She couldn't blame Anakin – or Ani – if they chose to turn to the Dark Side as a result. Somehow, she doubts that the Council has any idea how precarious the situation is right now. Instead of focusing on Custos, they need to be focusing on the galaxy and the Sith. Custos is not a threat. He never has been a threat, so they ought not to be treating him as such.

She feels unsettled, off balanced, shaken. All her life, Ahsoka had thought that the Council was always right, that they always did good. It's so jarring, so… difficult to see how much of a mistake they've made. Custos did nothing wrong, so why did they arrest him? It doesn't make any sense. Of course, he would try to protect the child under his care. It's unfair to expect otherwise. This isn't something she can simply forget. No matter what happens, Ahsoka knows that she can't simply forgive this. Hurting Anakin and Ani in this way is completely inexcusable and unjustifiable.

Anakin sighs, looking even more exhausted than he did a moment ago. "I think maybe we should return to the 501st," he proposes. "Ani is more familiar with his quarters there, and I think Rex and the other boys might like to meet him. The distraction would be good."

For both of them, Ahsoka thinks, though she doesn't say so. She would never object to hanging out with the clones either.

Unsurprisingly, Padme agrees.

**w**

Ani jolts awake not even an hour later, and though he doesn't make a sound, Anakin can tell that he had a nightmare, especially from the way his eyes instinctively dart around the room, scanning it and marking the exits. It's something both of them had to learn when they were young, and some things can't be unlearned easily.

"I was thinking that we could go back up to the Star Destroyer," Anakin tells him conversationally. "The clones probably want to meet you." He had briefly – very briefly – given Ani a run-down on the current state of the galaxy, including the Clone Wars, so he knows about the clones and who they are, even if he hasn't actually met them.

Ani considers that for a moment before nodding. "Okay," he agrees, surprisingly easily.

They and Ahsoka leave Padme's apartment without further ado, taking the shuttle back up to the Star Destroyer. Anakin is moving on automatic, feeling somewhat detached from his own body. He's completely numb, distant. It's a feeling that he hates, especially since his ability to respond to anything rationally is greatly reduced. He suspects that part of that is due to Ani's emotional status right now. It's as if – as if he's… the living dead, alive in body, but not in mind. Why did you do this Obi-Wan? Why won't you let us be with Custos when we need him?

Rex meets them in the hanger, gaze lingering on Ani when Anakin introduces them officially. He knew, of course, what had happened; it's not been much of a secret amongst the clones, and Anakin thinks that they've been eager to meet Ani. They take the child around the Star Destroyer, giving him a tour of the most important areas, though he doesn't wander more than a couple feet from either Anakin or Ahsoka. It hurts to see, because Anakin knows that when he was little, he would have crawled over every single inch of the ship, wanting to see and understand everything.

Naturally, he's most intrigued by the hanger bay, and they spend at least one hour – maybe two – looking through the many types of ships there. Anakin even gives Ani an up-close view of his starfighter; he lifts the younger boy into the cockpit and lets him look around, pointing out all of the controls, promising to take him out on a practice flight later on.

They, go to the training rooms last, where Ahsoka ends up letting Ani borrow one of her lightsabers, so he can show her what he knows about lightsaber forms while Anakin watches from the sidelines. Rex is standing next to him, shadowing him the way he has this whole time. He followed them everywhere, and Anakin doesn't miss the worried glances the clone captain keeps giving him. It's as if he realizes that Anakin is half out of it, though it's probably a bit obvious from the way he's acting and responding to everyone.

"General, are you alright?" Rex asks quietly, while Ahsoka enthusiastically walks Ani through lightsaber basics; he knows quite a bit already, but he's still far behind anyone his age.

"I'm fine, or I will be," he amends when he senses the clone's skepticism.

"If you say so, sir," Rex replies, not even bothering to hide his disbelief. "All the boys are willing to stand behind you if you need our help," he adds a moment later.

Anakin frowns, and it takes him longer to understand than it probably should. He offers Rex a faint smile. "That will not be necessary," he assures him. "I have no intentions of fighting my way into the Temple… but I appreciate the thought."

Rex simply nods, turning back to look at Ahsoka and Ani. Fives and Hardcase are talking to them now, but they're still close enough that Anakin can hear much of what they're saying. "Have you ever used a blaster before, kid?" Fives asks.

Ani hesitates before shaking his head. "Once actually," he admits with a slight shrug, "But it was a simple model." His expression openly curious. Anakin is glad to see it, because he had been hoping that meeting the clones would prove a useful distraction for the child. So far, it seems to be working.

Hardcase looks positively gleeful at Ani's response. "I can show you how to use one!" he offers.

"Sure," Ani agrees.

Fives gives Hardcase a pointed look, and Anakin knows what he's thinking. Hardcase uses a Z-6 rotary blaster cannon, which is not only heavy, but far more dangerous than a regular blaster, like the DC-17 hand blaster which Rex uses or the DC-15 blaster rifle which most of the clones use. Fives, like Anakin, is not keen on the thought of a child being shown how to use such a weapon. He's more than capable of handling the situation though – that's why he's one of Anakin's closest friends – and Anakin won't interfere unless it's truly necessary. Watching them is calming enough.

"Here," Fives says, unholstering his DC-17 hand blaster, which is the same model that Rex uses. "You should be able to use this easily."

Anakin watches as the clones help Ani adjust his stance before letting him shoot at the target. He's surprisingly good, using the Force to help him hit it every time, though his aim is still a little off; he doesn't hit the center very often, but it's still far better than Anakin had anticipated.

"It's helping him," Ahsoka murmurs, moving to his side, eyes pinned on Ani. It's so obvious how much more relaxed he is with something to distract him from the pain of missing his father. Anakin doesn't know the first thing about taking care of children – Ahsoka doesn't count, because she was older when he met her than Ani is now – but he hopes that he'll be able to provide proper distractions for Ani for the foreseeable future.

Maybe he can take him out in his fighter tomorrow, or even let him fly his own. No one needs to know, except Ahsoka and Rex. Or maybe Padme can tell him more about her Senate work. That's something they probably should discuss together tonight.

As it becomes later, Ani bids the clones a goodbye as they head back down to the surface. Padme will be happy to have them all over for dinner, and besides, Ani could use another familiar face around him. The exhilaration Ani felt from seeing the Star Destroyer and practicing with a lightsaber and blaster clearly fade as they arrive at Padme's apartment. He's clinging to Ahsoka's side, expression miserable despite Anakin's attempt at keeping the atmosphere lighthearted.

One night ago, they were together with Custos, but now… He doesn't want to think about it. He doesn't want to let himself acknowledge how much he'll miss that brief, lingering moment where he felt completely safe and protected. For so long, he's had to protect himself, and having someone there with him was… he doesn't even know how to describe it.

And while Anakin hasn't turned his comm back on, he knows it won't be much of a deterrence if Obi-Wan really wants to talk to him. More than likely, he'll insist on finding him tomorrow, having decided that Anakin is no longer permitted to continue ignoring him. He is not looking forward to that. At all.

But that is a problem for tomorrow. For tonight, he'll focus on Ani.

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