In Which Addison Crosses the Line
Last night after Meredith came over, we drank a little more and watched old Disney classics. I told her about this clinical trial for Alzheimer's that I thought she might be interested in trying to get her mother into. We talked about that some then I mostly ranted to Meredith about my life with Derek and I even told her that I started growing feelings for his best friend. I didn't tell her that those feelings aren't exactly gone but I did tell her that I slept with him once and Derek still doesn't know. It's too late though. The papers are signed and now I'm a free woman. I mean, yes, the divorce has to be finalized which could take a while but I am back to being Addison Forbes Montgomery and that's who I need to focus on right now. I need to learn how to better take care of myself. Maybe I could start by eating better and working out…
I'm thinking about all this while I'm in the OR performing surgery on a patient of mine. Meredith came in with me this morning and is standing up in the gallery keeping me company. We were talking earlier but now she's just watching. I'm supposed to be taking her blood after this. She needs it for her mother's clinical trial. I look up at the gallery as Cristina enters. I see she and Meredith are talking but I don't know what about. They finish up their conversation right around the time I finish up the surgery and I go to scrub out.
Meredith joins me in the hallway after and we walk down to the ER to find a trauma room where I can draw her blood. Meredith sits on the bed and stretches her arm out on the table and I begin.
"Thank you for doing this," she clarifies, "With the needles and the blood. They won't accept her without a full family history."
"I'm happy to get your mom into the clinical trial. Even with the needles and blood," I say as I finish and stand up. It's silent for a moment as her vivid green eyes gazes deep into my soul. Okay, maybe I'm being a little dramatic but her eyes are gorgeous. I break the moment first, "All done. How's that feel?"
"Feels good," she replies as my pager goes off.
I smile to her and we exchange a quick kiss, "I got to go."
I take off towards the surgical floor where I find Izzie standing out in the hallway, "I was paged?"
"It's Dr. Bailey. They took her downstairs to your OB wing," she says nonchalantly and I look at her confused. It's like she read my mind because she basically answers my question, "She's nearly seven months. She didn't tell anyone and no one noticed."
"Wow," I say simply. I thought Dr. Bailey was pregnant at a point of time but she never confirmed it and I never asked so I just let the idea go completely.
I make my way to the OB wing and I find Dr. Bailey in an exam room. She tells me that she thinks she's having false labor and I decide to start with an ultrasound. If I knew she was pregnant, I probably would've told her to go on bed rest a long time ago. Being a surgeon here is way too stressful on the baby.
"There he is," I point out her baby on the monitor, "Heartbeat's strong. Since there's no dilation or effacement, looks like nothing more than Braxton Hicks."
Dr. Bailey sits up, "Except I know the mild concerned tone. I've used it myself from time to time."
I nod and speak up, "Sometimes false labor is the body's way of telling you to slow down."
"I'm a surgeon," she replies simply.
"I understand the realities of your job but you need to understand the realities of your pregnancy and take it easy," I say sternly then ask, "Is there anything I can do to help?"
"Uh, yeah for starters you can help me get up off this table," she says to me as Izzie knocks on the door and walks in.
"Dr. Bailey," Izzie looks up from her chart, "The GI lab has a couple of questions about Miss. Miyazaki's esophagram."
"Well let's go," Dr. Bailey says getting up and walking out of the room.
"Dr. Stevens," I call out and Izzie stops and turns around, "Keep an eye on her today. Watch out for any painful contractions. More than 5 in an hour. Anything that could indicate preterm labor." Izzie shakes her head 'no' and I frown wanting to punch her but I restrain myself. "The favor is not for me Stevens, you know that." Izzie complies, nods and walks off.
Later in the day, not surprisingly, I get paged about Dr. Bailey again. She went into preterm labor and I stopped the contractions then sent her home. Dr. Bailey's interns and I are walking down the hallway with Dr. Bailey while her nurse is pushing her in wheelchair on the way to go home.
"Bed rest at home until the baby comes," I say then I joke, "You do know what bed rest is don't you Miranda?"
"Yeah hell," she says while being wheeled backwards into an elevator.
"Hell with TV and books," Izzie says as she hands Dr. Bailey a present, "Here, it's from all of us."
Dr. Bailey stares at us all evilly and her interns all smile at her from outside the elevator. The elevator doors begin to close, but Dr. Bailey stops it with her foot.
"I may be 47 months pregnant. I may be on bed rest. I may not be able to see my own feet but I am Dr. Bailey. I hear everything. I know everything. I'm watching each and every one of you. And I will return," she says to her interns then let's the doors close when she finishes.
I try to to stifle a laugh as her interns disperse. Meredith walks over to me and holds onto my hand then we begin walking down the hallway.
"You know, I heard the nurses' were going on strike tomorrow," she says to me and I stare back at her in shock.
"What?"
"Yeah, apparently they notified the chief last week. They don't like how they have to work more and get paid less because of the new hospital budget," she says and shrugs as her pager goes off, "Damn it. I have to go."
She kisses me on the cheek then runs off in the other direction from which we came. I continue walking down the hall and I find Richard wiping the OR board clean. I see Dr. Burke standing near the stairs watching him and I walk up to Dr. Burke.
I wonder if he's heard the rumor about the nurses so I look over to him questionably, "Strike?"
"Strike," he answers simply.
Richard turns around then says, "You are all a bunch of arrogant surgeons."
He walks off while Dr. Burke and I exchange confusing looks. I just shrug and he nods then we part ways.
Sure enough the next day, the entrance at Seattle Grace Hospital was filled with a large group of nurses holding large signs while chanting 'Fair hours, fair wages!'. They've formed a picket line in front of the hospital where I found myself stuck. I don't want to cross it but I have tiny humans that I have to take care of. Dr. O'Malley and Dr. Stevens walk up to the line as well.
George sighs and shakes his head, "Can't. Can't, can't cross the picket line. I can't."
"I don't like it either, George, but what choice do we have? Ok, you took an oath to heal. You're a healer," Izzie looks at him then looks at me. I look back at her and she looks back to George.
"Dad's a truck driver. Mom's a teacher. The evening news shows me crossing the picket line… they'll outlive me just to pee on my grave," George says then Izzie and I both give him a weird look.
Dr. Yang also walks up to us and says, "Has there been any blood yet? Heard they brought in scab nurses."
"I think the nurses know that we are on their side," Izzie ponders out loud.
One of the nurses yells, "Don't cross the line!"
"Don't they?" Izzie says believing it a little less.
Cristina shrugs, "Well we're doctors. We have sick patients inside. We have surgeries."
"Ok… Then you go first," Izzie replies.
"Screw it," she says heading through the line as food is thrown at her. We watch while she attempts to fend it off. She makes into the hospital then turns around laughing at the nurses, "Yeah doing my job! Doing my job! Ha-ha!"
"They threw food at her!" Izzie says and George nods, "That is just wrong! Fine I'm going in!"
George and I watch as Izzie makes her way in also has food thrown at her. She uses her huge purse to fend off the fruit. In the mass of nurses she walks past Olivia who screams at her, "Change your own bed pan, Stevens!"
"Yeah, enjoy your syphilis Olivia," she makes it to the front doors and squeals as one last orange is thrown at her. She turns around and yells out, "George, are you coming?"
"No, I'm good here," he says just standing at the end of the picket line watching.
He looks at me and I just shake my head at him. I make my walk into the hospital standing tall and proud to be an 'arrogant surgeon' as Richard put it last night. I take the food like a man and just protected my face as I walked through.
When I get inside, I can literally feel that the balance is off. People are all over the place, patients, staff galore… I spot Dr. Burke at the nurses' station and I make my way over to him. When I see Patricia walking down the hall with one of the temp nurses, I start complaining to him about the whole situation.
"And I can't say this enough charts are organized by room number. I know you're temp nurses but there's no excuse for sloppiness," Patricia says as the nurse nods and walks into an adjoining room. Patricia walks over to where are Preston and I are standing going over our own charts meanwhile still complaining and interrupts us before walking off, "You know why I stopped being a nurse? Doctors. Doctors who don't know how to pitch in."
"Right," Dr. Burke says sarcastically as Richard walks by and we both run up to him.
I comment, "This place is going to hell."
"We need to find a way to compromise," Dr. Burke adds before he walks off.
I nod agreeing and add, "We need the real nurses back."
"We need an additional 40 nurses to relieve the overtime that they're striking about. That's 2 million dollars a year we don't have," Richard finally speaks up.
"Have you checked under the couch? I always find spare change under the cushions," it's a joke but it's true. I usually find lots of change under the cushions. I look over at Richard and he's giving me a sour look, "Ok, I'm silencing myself."
Richard goes back to his office and I walk down the hall looking for Dr. Bailey's interns. I need Dr. Stevens for a consult. When I find them, I see that they're with a new resident, Dr. Sydney Heron, until Miranda gets back. She's a bit too much for me… I watch as all the other interns scatter and Izzie is left there with Dr. Heron. She looks uncomfortable… I walk up to Izzie and I smile, "Hey Dr. Stevens."
Izzie answers eagerly, "Yeah."
"Could use you on a consult," I start but I don't even get a chance to finish before she answers.
"Ok. I'm on it. Absolutely," she drops what she's doing and grabs my file. She follows me to our patient's room and I have to say that was surprisingly easy.
We're in the exam room now and I'm letting Izzie perform the ultrasound. She's just a teenaged girl still in highschool being raised by a single mother. At least her mother is here supporting her.
"Is that too much?" Cheyenne asks me about the picture on the screen.
I shake my head, "It's a lot of extra amniotic fluid, Cheyenne, but your baby looks strong."
"Does that mean we can go? I mean appreciate you seeing us, I really do but this is a long drive for us and I can't afford to miss another shift," her mother asks.
I frown and look to Cheyenne, "Unfortunately, Ms. Wood, the mass on the baby's neck is what's causing the build up in fluid. It's also obstructing her airway and the spine."
"Mom," Cheyenne says nervously as she looks over to her mother.
Ms. Wood comforts her, "It's alright. Just listen."
I nod and continue, "We're going to do a procedure called an exit surgery. Basically we do a C-section and only half deliver the baby."
"Half deliver?" Cheyenne questions.
I nod, "That's right. We pull the head and the arms out but we don't cut the umbilical cord."
"Why?" the girl asks and my intern speaks up.
"The tumor won't let air get to the baby's lungs. So we need the umbilical cord to keep her alive during the operation. It's kinda cool if you think about it. You'll be like your baby's life support machine," Izzie smiles trying to lessen her nerves.
I decide to continue on, "And then after the surgery if all goes well, we cut the umbilical cord and you'll be the mother of a healthy baby girl. How does that sound?"
Cheyenne looks relieved but her mother just shakes her head and says, "That sounds expensive."
"Well, your doctor at the clinic is a former student of mine, so it's covered," I smile then turn to Izzie, "I'm gonna go head up and take this to the lab."
She nods and I leave the room. I make my way upstairs to drop off the lab work then I decide to go find someone from neuro for a consult. Good thing Derek is gone because I refuse to work with him again. He was so vexed about the baby that we last worked on together and even started calling me Satan. I wouldn't be able to take it. I don't like working with Dr. Cam. He's too ignorant for me. Luckily, I run into Dr. Saroyan. She's obviously the better surgeon although Dr. Cam is head of the department. They should definitely start making changes around here.
We're back in Cheyenne's room where we're going over the procedure and making sure that she fully understands the process before we get the surgery scheduled. Dr. Saroyan talked through her procedure with mom and daughter and we're coming to a close.
Dr. Saroyan nods and speaks up, "Cheyenne, the prognosis is very good. So what we want to try to do is go in and get as much of the tumor out as possible during your surgery."
"So my baby will be fine?" Cheyenne asks for reassurance.
Dr. Saroyan nods, "Yes."
"You may be able to take your baby home by the end of the week," I add.
Cheyenne's face lit up at that notion, "That soon?"
"Absolutely. She'll be all yours," I smile.
Cheyenne nods, "Oh. Ok."
"Ok. Now, if you and your mother have any questions Dr. Stevens will page me. All right?" Dr. Saroyan finishes and both the girl and her mom nods. Dr. Saroyan nods to Izzie and both of us leave the room.
"Thanks for the consult," I say as we part ways in the hallway.
She shakes her head, "No problem."
"I'll have the surgery scheduled for first thing tomorrow morning," I say and I add "Maybe we could grab lunch after?"
"Sure, sounds like a plan," she says walking away.
Hours later, on my way out, I stop to check in on Cheyenne when I see Izzie has already beaten me to it. It looks like they're deep in conversation and I decide to listen in while I wait to step in.
Izzie pauses in the middle of her statement then speaks up again, "I grew up in Chehalis too."
"Serious?" the young girl says.
Izzie nods, "Serious. Um, Forest Park."
Cheyenne smiles, "The trailer…" Izzie speaks up at the same time, "park behind the church."
Izzie continues, "Yeah. On Route 6. Yeah."
"My friend Shelley lives up there," the girl adds.
Izzie smiles softly, "Yeah? My mom still lives there."
"No way," the girl says.
"Yeah huh," Izzie pauses and they both smile before she speaks up again, "Can you keep a secret?" Cheyenne nods as Izzie reaches into her pocket, pulls out something and hands it the girl. "This is my daughter," Izzie says sitting down next to her, "In the picture she's 6 but she's 11 now. She lived in Santa Barbara but they moved. I don't know where. But I know her name is Hannah and she likes pigs."
"Pigs?" the young girl chuckles.
Izzie smiles, "Yep, she collects them; like figurines and stuffed animals, you know. I think it's because her mom probably read her 'Charlotte's Web'."
"I thought you were her mom," the girl questions.
I notice tears welling up in Izzie's eyes, "I'm her mother but I'm not her mom… Look, um, I know that where we come from this kind of thing doesn't get talked about but I wanted you to know that there's more than one way to be a good mother. I wanted, I wanted better for her than I could do at sixteen."
"I love my baby," Cheyenne says with a strain in her voice.
Izzie nods, "Of course you do… But you're reading her Shakespeare." Cheyenne starts crying softly and Izzie reaches over to comfort her, "When you're working 12 hour shifts at the diner like our mom's, you won't be coming home and reading her Shakespeare." Izzie smiles down at Cheyenne's stomach as I reach up and wipe my face not realizing that I had started crying. I decide not to go in tonight. I'll just check in first thing in the morning.
I walk away from the room and back towards the elevators. I take it all the way down to the lobby then I make my way towards the exit. I'm almost out the door when someone walks up behind me and takes my hand. I look over to see Meredith smiling up at me and I force a smile.
"Hey," she says softly then turns me around towards her, "What's going on?"
"Nothing," I smile, "it's just a patient and I'm a little emotional right now…"
"Understandable," she says then kisses my cheek softly, "I haven't seen you all day. It looks like we kept missing each other."
"Yeah, it's been a pretty busy day… and I see you all worked with Dr. Heron today," I laugh when I see her roll her eyes.
She sighs, "Please don't get me started on Dr. Heron. She's just too happy for me. No one can be that cheery all the time. She is worse than Izzie."
The mention of her name makes my eyes well up again… I shake it off as she walks me to my car, "Do you have any plans for tonight?"
"Well, a couple of the interns were coming over. We were going to get drunk and watch some of my mother's old tapes," she smiles, "but you're more than welcome to come over."
"I would love to but… don't you think the interns would be a little weirded out if their boss showed up?" I ask.
She shrugs, "I guess when you put it that way…"
"There's always tomorrow," I smile and she nods. Once we make it to my car, I look over to her and sigh, "Well, I guess this is goodnight."
Meredith stands up on her tippy toes and kisses me deep, long, slowly on the lips. She pulls away after a minute and looks up to me, "Goodnight, Addison."
She turns to walk away but I pull her back for another kiss.
"Goodnight, Meredith," this time she really leaves. I get into my car and drive off into the night.
It's sunrise in Seattle. It's a new day yet the nurses are still chanting down at the picket line. I take the elevator to the surgical floor and when I step off, I hear screaming. I walk over the nurses' station and I see George staring off in the distance.
"You crossed the picket line?" I ponder.
"No, I'm not actually here," he says still staring in what I realize is the direction of Izzie and our patient, Cheyenne's, mother, Ms. Woods. I turn my attention towards them when the yelling picks up again.
"She's a kid you know? She's scared enough without you putting ideas in her head," the mother yells at my intern, "How do you tell a scared kid to give her baby away?"
"I didn't tell her. I didn't advise her. I didn't pressure her. I just," Izzie pause to find the right words, "talked to her."
"You're not a shrink!," the mother yells, "You're not her mother. She's my kid and you crossed the line."
"I'm sorry," Izzie says.
"No you're not sorry. You're superior," the mother starts yelling again, "So what you're a big shot doctor and you get to judge us? You get to tell my kid how to live her life?"
I feel like I should intervene… Izzie is obviously fed up. You can see it in her movements when she speaks, "Cheyenne is smart. She's smart and she's thoughtful and she can have more. She can have more than a trailer park and a graveyard shift at a truck stop diner. Don't you want that for her?" Izzie pause and Ms. Wood just glares at her, "I mean if you can get past the fact that I'm superior and that I'm judging you and that I'm telling you what's best for your family. If you can just get past all of that, isn't it possible that I'm also right?"
Izzie doesn't even give the mother a chance to speak again before walking away. The mother angrily grunts then I guess goes back to her daughter's room. I decide to not get in that and turn back to George, "So you're not really here?"
"The nurses sent me in with notes," he says and I smirk. Even when protesting, they just can't stay away.
We're in the OR now. Dr. Saroyan and I are just about done performing the surgery on Cheyenne's baby. Once we're finished, I have Izzie cut the umbilical cord and I take the baby out. I hand Izzie the baby who takes the her to the side and rests her down a lined table. I see her smile at the baby and I know all is well then we proceed to close.
I'm walking down the hallway of the surgical floor right after scrubbing out. I'm about to go to my office when I see Meredith basically run out of a patient's room almost in tears and looking like she's having difficult breathing. She rushes into the nearest linen closet and I hurry to follow. When I walk in, I find Meredith sitting on the ground hyperventilating. I sit down next to her and I take her in my arms.
"I don't. I can't. I can't. I don't want. I don't. I can't. I don't. I don't want my mother to die alone," she cries.
I need to help her out of this panic attack so I hold her closer and whisper, "Slow down. Just slow down. Shh. Slow deep breaths now. Slow deep breaths." Meredith just continues to cry. She's still having difficulty breathing and I look up to see a paper bag. I stand up and reach above Meredith's head pulling down a white paper bag. Handing it to her, I speak up again in a calm quiet voice, "Here. Take it easy. Slow down. Slow down."
As Meredith breathes into the bag, she takes one of my hands in her own and holds onto it tightly. I can see her breathing slowing down and her body start to relax. Eventually she stops crying and rests her head against my shoulder. I take my free arm and wrap it back around her then I rest my head against hers. We stay here for a moment until Meredith pulls away the bag and sits up.
"I'm okay," she finally speaks up.
I smile at her while wiping a tear away and brushing the hair away from her face, "You're okay."
"Thank you," she looks up at me.
"You don't need to thank me. This is what I'm here for," I say and we stare into each other's eyes for a long time. Meredith breaks the moment by kissing me. When she pulls away, she gets up and walks out leaving me sitting in the closet by myself.
Lunch with Dr. Saroyan was fun… I learned a lot about her like, her first name is Stacie. She's from New York and she was a cop for eleven years before deciding to become a Neurosurgeon. The only thing about her is that she's a strict rule follower but that quality might make her head of Neuro one day. I hope that day is soon and they get rid of Dr. Cam… I think Stacie and I could be friends somewhere down the line. I say down the line because right now, I'm not focused on making friends, I'm focused on breaking ground here at Seattle Grace. I want to do things that have never been done before and live up to the Chief's expectation of putting this hospital on the map. Well of course not literally since it's already on a map… but anyway…
Later in the evening, I find myself on the catwalk with a cup of Juju looking out towards the picket line. I'm surprised that they're still out there. That takes strength, endurance and patience which I don't have much of… I commend them for that.
I hear footsteps approaching and I look over to see Meredith. I smile and she smiles weakly back then stands beside me looking out into the crowd. She doesn't say anything but she reaches for my coffee and I let her take it.
She sips it then looks over to me, "I caught the Chief visiting my mother at the nursing home this morning… He admitted to visiting her two to three times a week. He asked me if I wanted him to stop. I didn't know how to answer that so I kind of just ran away…"
I look over at her to see the seriousness on her face and I can't help but laugh.
"Hey," she says defensively and gives me back my coffee. After a moment she speaks up again this time so quietly that I barely hear her, "I think they had a fling…"
I look over to see her face and she looks so serious. "You know, you could be right," I say nodding as I think back to when I first met Richard… Now that I've thought about it some more, it was probably true… She doesn't respond this time and we both turn back to the crowd outside. I notice the line started to deform and the nurses start cheering. We spot Richard out there talking with them, "It seems as though, he finally gave in to their demands."
When Meredith doesn't respond, I look over to make sure she's still here. She looks up at me and smiles, "I just realized something… As much as we've gone out, I've never been the one to take you on a date."
"Is that so?" I say as I move closer into her.
She smiles back up at me and tugs on my lab coat a little. She bites her lip, "Dr. Montgomery, would you like to go out with me tonight? Let's say six o'clock?"