Maybe we should just try (to tell ourselves a good lie)
It's not true
Tell me I've been lied to
Cryin' isn't like you
Ooh
What the hell did I do?
Never been the type to
Let someone see right through
AT THIS MOMENT HE REALIZED his hated brother always tried to protect him, shut his grief and sadness off for him and tried his best to raise him at the age of nine.
He was the one who always told his brother how useless, unworthy and cruel he was but he never knew that the only cruelty was his behaviour and how he didn't see his brothers scars or the dark sunken-in eyes and the lifeless look in them.
He didn't smell the alcohol in his breath or saw the bottle of pills under his brother's pillow.
He didn't hear his brother silently asking God to die. To make his pain stop. How he begged and begged every and all night.
Why didn't I notice the signs?
Why did I only ever cared for myself?
Why, Why Why?,
he thought grief stricken as he looked at the cold and in snow covered headstone.
The words his brother longed to hear for so long, never to be heard, fell from his lips:
i love you, brother.
And in that moment he knew
he was alone.
The smile that you gave me
Even when you felt like dyin'
We fall apart as it gets dark
I'm in your arms in Central Park
i love you - Billie Eilish