This one is for Helena Mira, who requested an outtake of Carlisle's sermon at Rosalie and Emmett's wedding in 1935. So this corresponds to 1935, Chapter 16. I thought it might be fun to write original vows as well, and of course some Carlisle and Esme cuteness... needless to say, I cried while writing this.
Disclaimer: The italicized text used here is from the Book of Common Prayer, though not today's version. Carlisle has his human grandfather's 1549 version, and the modern spellings/grammar updates are Carlisle's (my) adjustment into today's English. I almost wrote the whole thing out in Early Modern, but Rosalie didn't like it. For my fellow linguaphiles out there who would like to see the original text (or, sort of the original text), just google "1549 book of common prayer matrimony" and click on the first result.
Carlisle POV
As we approached the chapel, Emmett grew more nervous with each step.
"What if I step on her feet? What if I forget my vows? What if she changes her mind? What if-"
I reached up, laying my hand on his huge shoulder. "Emmett, everything is going to be fine. Please, relax."
He nodded and sucked in an enormous breath, forcing his shoulders down as he exhaled. Emmett was still a newborn, and his wedding jitters were no exception to the emotional vividness that marked this time. My own anxiety was quieter, but very real; I had never done this before. I had pieces of memories: my human father, performing the Solemnization of Matrimony often during the mid-seventeenth century. I remembered little of the ceremonies themselves, though, and I personally had never given so much as a Sunday sermon. This was new territory for me. I felt an awkwardness I hadn't felt in years. Was I really qualified to perform this marriage? Did my long years of peace and my efforts at humanity make up for what I was? For the fact that I had never actually been ordained?
Earlier this week, Edward and I had, quite by accident, fallen into our old debate. Redemption, atonement, the state of our souls… heavy words. And most of the time, they really didn't matter. My theology had, by necessity, gotten creative over the years- first, when I was forced to accept my new identity, and again, when I contemplated the possibility of creating others like me. And again, when I married a woman –legally dead, to my credit- whose husband was still living. Lying, forgery, and even outright fraud, were a daily part of my life now. When my loved ones committed accidental manslaughter from time to time, I smiled sadly and forgave them, assuring them that I understood. Two of my children had committed murder in the past, and I had accepted them back under my roof with open arms. I tampered with evidence, impeded investigations, and robbed morgues.
There was a part of me that was horrified at these things- a part of me that, if left unchecked, would leave me paralyzed, unable to reconcile my compromises with my good intentions… with my faith. But I was a man of action; I always had been. And now, as the leader of a growing family, I no longer had the luxury of spending years of deliberation on each difficult decision placed before me. Sometimes, I made the wrong decisions. But I always moved on, facing each new challenge with the greatest integrity I could muster. I chose, at every turn, to have hope. I had, having no other recourse, blended the worlds of fantasy and reality into a workable philosophy, and into a life that I felt worthy to be lived before God. I had only to look at my family, my vocation, my future with Esme, to know that I was trying my best… and that good things had come of that effort.
And now here I stood, daring to serve as God's priest in perhaps the most sacred ceremony of all. The binding of two hearts, in the sight of Heaven, giving my declaration of the endorsement of the Almighty: a weighty calling. In customary terms, I was not adequate to serve in this role. But then… my life hadn't been customary for quite some time. Beneath my anxiety, I felt a peace as I faced this sacred duty. Rosalie and Emmett meant the world to me, and I could think of no greater fatherly joy than to see them bound together in the holiest of ways. And I could think of no greater honor than being the one to see it done. I would pour myself into this role with humility and gratitude, as I had done with every other role I had assumed. Not gratitude for what I was: gratitude that I had lived to see this day.
The forest was suddenly filled the sound of classical piano. "That doesn't sound like Irina's style," Eleazar said curiously. "I thought she was playing for the ceremony."
"She was," I answered. "I suppose there's been a change in plans, though. That sounds like a recording."
We entered the chapel, and Emmett whistled as he took in the sight of the carpet, the altar, the piano, and the dance floor- complete with electric lanterns overheard. The air was now sweet with flowers. I led Emmett to his place, and straightened his tie one last time.
Edward, we're ready, I thought.
Eleazar gave Emmett an encouraging nod and took his seat on one of the benches. I picked up my father's Book of Common Prayer; it was time.
Kate came down the aisle first, her camera dangling below her bouquet. She laid her flowers on the altar and then turned to photograph the others as they came. Irina was next, and then Tanya, and then Carmen. They all laid their flowers on the altar in turn and took their seats. And then my breath caught, for she was here: the most beautiful woman in the world.
Esme.
She floated down the aisle like the others had, but none could compare to her grace. Her gown was the softest shade of rose, her hair a crown. The moonlight glistened on her skin, its extra glow winking in and out as she passed below the shade of the trees. The floral sweetness in the air was immediately balanced by the warmer caramel of her scent, and she smiled at me. She spoke volumes with that smile: how proud she was, how blessed, how happy. I nodded my understanding.
She brushed my arm, just barely, on her way up to the altar. Her touch, even through the sleeve of my tuxedo, sent my cold heart pulsing with warmth. I turned to watch her, and the very corner of her lips twisted into a hint of a mischievous smile; she had done it on purpose! I waited until she had passed me again, and then I grabbed her shoulders, spinning her back around into my arms for a kiss.
"Don't think that's part of the ceremony," Emmett muttered beside us.
I released my wife and grinned back at him. I had to readjust my tie, while Esme tucked a loosened lock of hair back into formation as she took her place opposite Emmett. "It is now," I said to him under my breath. Esme had taken away my last trace of anxiety; somehow, she always knew when I needed that.
And not a moment too soon. The music swelled, and Edward and Rosalie turned the corner to come into sight at the back of the chapel. Our little audience stood to honor the bride, and what a sight she was: my daughter was radiantly beautiful. Not like an angel- that was reserved for Esme- but like a star, fallen from heaven with her shimmering brilliance still clinging to her. And as her eyes met Emmett's, she broke into a smile that was pure and shining. I glanced at my newest son, to find his mouth hanging unceremoniously open at the sight of his bride. I nudged his elbow, and he clamped his mouth shut again, just in time for Kate to snap a picture. As Edward and Rosalie approached us, her hand on his arm, I remembered. I remembered, with a brief stirring of shame, why I had first changed my daughter. I sent up a quick prayer of thanks, that my foolish plans had come to nothing. Better than nothing- they had come to this. I knew, beyond a shadow of a doubt, that Rosalie and Emmett had been made for each other… and not by me. And I knew, with equal confidence, that Edward would someday find the young woman that been made for him. If anyone deserved the completion that true love brought, it was him. One such as Edward couldn't exist without such a hope promised.
Edward and Rosalie reached us, and Rosalie took a deep breath, giving me a shaky, grateful smile. Edward tenderly placed her hand in Emmett's, and then withdrew to stand behind his brother. I opened the Book and read the ancient words aloud, translating into Modern English as I went:
Dearly beloved friends, we are gathered here today in the sight of God, and in the face of this congregation, to join together this man and this woman in holy matrimony, which is an honorable estate instituted of God in paradise, in the time of innocent man, signifying unto us the mystical union that is between Christ and his Church: which in holy estate, Christ adorned and beautified with his presence, and first miracle that he wrought in Cana of Galilee, and it is commended of Saint Paul to be honorable among all men; and therefore is not to be enterprised, nor taken in hand unadvisedly, lightly, or wantonly, to satisfy men's carnal lusts and appetites, like brute beasts that have no understanding: but reverently, discreetly, advisedly, soberly, and in the fear of God.
I closed the Book then. I would use its hallowed words again, later in the ceremony. But for now, my own words would be more appropriate. It would only be hurtful to read aloud the purposes of matrimony, the first of which was the procreation of children. And the vows would not come from the book, either; sickness and health, and hopefully, death, would have no bearing on this marriage. Though it would have been amusing to see the look on Rosalie's face if I were to call upon her vow to obey and serve her husband! In any case, Rosalie and Emmett had agreed to use the vows that Esme and I had whispered to each other in private after our own wedding, once Edward had taken the priest back to Brazil. But first, the sermon. I took a shallow breath, looking to Esme for courage. She nodded slightly, and I began.
"Emmett and Rosalie, you have come today to bind yourselves together in marriage. In the human world, this sacred matrimony is a covenant to transcend all others; the combination of two persons into one flesh, one family, one destiny. This covenant is a joyful one and a solemn one, holy unto God and binding in the sight of all men. It is the only covenant undertaken by humans, between humans, that is intended to last unbroken unto death.
"But your vows today are far stronger. You are not joining together for the mere span of a human life; you are each committing to travel eternity with the other. Today, you begin a journey together that, I pray, has no end at all. Your love is, by your very natures, powerful enough to withstand the test of time. I need not exhort you to be faithful to one another, nor to suffer one another. You are no longer humans, weak in heart and fickle in commitment. You are vampires, capable of a far deeper bond. You have found in each other your eternal mate, and your love cannot cool; it is final, absolute. It cannot be broken, not even by death. It cannot fade, cannot become false, cannot betray willingly.
"But I do exhort you to kindness, and to generosity, one to the other. You may not be human any longer, but you do carry human flaws. You will each be tempted, in your own way, to give your mate less than your full self, less than your full devotion, less than your constant encouragement. Your support of each other must be as tireless as your immortal bodies, as patient as your immortal minds. You will enjoy a passionate, young love for eternity, but beware. You are also capable, through your nature, of passionate anger, of passionate misery. By giving yourselves to each other, you also make yourselves vulnerable to each other. You have the power to both build up, and to tear down your mate with equal ferocity. Along with your sacred commitment today, I want you both to recognize the sacred trust that this love gives both of you. You must choose, anew every day, to use that trust to help one another, and not injure one another.
"You will both continue to be tempted, also, by the darker side of your vampire nature. You must help each other, remind each other of the gentle choice that we with golden eyes make; and, when necessary, restrain each other from violence against the species from which you arose. You will never be alone in this last effort, however. You have both chosen to remain under my authority as your coven leader, and as your father. I humbly thank you for your trust. You have a mother also, and a brother and cousins: a whole family to support you, not only in your humane choice, but in your new marriage. We will, every one of us, do our part to honor and respect this joyful union of two so dear to us."
I took a deep breath as my voice failed me; this next part was going to be difficult. Esme dabbed at her eyes uselessly, but sent me another burst of courage with her smile.
"For you are dear to me, Rosalie and Emmett. I may be expected some affection as your creator. But I have come to love each of you as my children, in a way that far surpasses the fleeting love of a human father. Rosalie…"
My voice failed once again. "Rosalie, you are the daughter that I was never going to have. You have brought such a lightness, such a depth into our lives, that we never expected. You have awakened places in my heart that I long thought dead. Your happiness, that I see in your eyes today, has been my constant prayer for two years. Your completion, which I see reflected in Emmett's heart today, has been Esme's hope for two years. We both, as your parents, know that our love is a help to you, but was never enough. None of us enter this life gladly, and none of us pretend that we do not, in some measure, wish to return to mortality. And this, indeed, has always been your particular burden: to yearn for a love that you thought would never come. But, Rosalie, this day has indeed come. I cannot speak of the joy that it gives me to see your dreams thus fulfilled."
Now Rosalie drew in a ragged breath, looking first at me and then staring up at Emmett as she gripped his hands. I turned to my son with a smile.
"Emmett. My newest son, and quite a surprise to us all! Imagine my shock when my daughter- who would never wish this life on anyone- ran up to me with you in her arms. I gave her the sad news that your mortality couldn't be helped, but she was adamant. I may be one of the most powerful, deadly creatures in the world, Emmett, but I could not resist my daughter's pleading eyes. Changed you were, and here you stand. I know I speak for all of us when I say you have made our lives brighter and happier. You have brought an energy into our household that has been missing these long years. But you have given us an even greater gift; you have brought my daughter happiness with your love. And you have been given a gift as well: the chance to start over with your angel. There is no doubt in my mind that you were created for one another. And Emmett, I do not speak of venom, nor of my own choice. I speak of design, of One more powerful than me. You and Rosalie are each other's perfect balance, each other's perfect answer; you always have been. You will complete her, gladden her, and worship her; she will complete you, temper you, and inspire you.
"This completion, that you bring to each other, is absolute. Let this ceremony today be the consummation of your love, your troth plighted before the consummation of your passion. For passion without love is commonplace. But love, properly bound and nourished, bears the fruit of passion in its eternal form. It is my great honor to perform this sacred duty today, and it is my great joy to see those I love so bound."
The record quieted at just the right moment, shifting into a gentle violin piece.
"Let us pray," I said in a clear voice. Rosalie handed her bouquet to Esme so that she could place her hands in Emmett's, and heads bowed in varying degrees of awkwardness. I opened the Book again, reading aloud the ancient words.
O Eternal God, creator and preserver of all mankind, giver of spiritual grace, the author of everlasting life: Send Thy blessing upon these Thy servants, this man, and this woman, whom we bless in Thy name, that as Isaac and Rebecca, after bracelets and jewels of gold given of the one to the other for tokens o their matrimony, lived faithfully together; so these persons may surely perform and keep the vow and covenant between them made, whereof this ring is given, and received, is a token and pledge. And may ever remain in perfect love and peace together; and live according to Thy laws, through Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen.
I moved aside, and Emmett gave Rosalie his arm. They stepped up onto the stage and took the burning tapers from the altar, lighting the larger candle in the center with them. I heard a feminine sniffle or two behind me, but I did not look back; I was equally as moved. Rosalie and Emmett now extinguished the tapers in favor of the new light: their separate lives ending, their life together begun. A newer custom, and decidedly un-Anglican; a beautiful touch, I decided. They returned to their places below me.
"Edward and Esme, the rings, if you please."
I took the rings and clasped them together in the symbol of infinity, holding them aloft. "These rings are the visible symbol of the commitment that Rosalie and Emmett are making today. In a human ceremony, their circular form suggests an eternal love, and its eternal promise. For humans, this symbol is hyperbolic. But it holds a literal meaning to our kind." I took one last deep breath; this last part was a little controversial, but honest. "When we find our true mate and the bond that it gives, the love therein is designed to be truly eternal. It cannot be broken by time or by death. It cannot bear this separation, for it is not meant to do so."
I gave the rings to Rosalie and Emmett, who slid them halfway onto each other's fingers. They froze in their movement, locking eyes. They said together their vows, repeating each line after me.
"Here I pledge my eternal love, stronger than blood, stronger than venom. I pledge to cherish you, to honor you, to follow and defend you. My silent heart will beat only for you, and my cold countenance will warm only to you. I will journey this earth forever with you, until its ending or our own. If death take you, I will avenge and follow you. If death take me, I will await you. I will celebrate our love anew with each sunrise, and marvel in the glistening wonder of each day with you. I will seek your good with all my heart, and defeat all those who seek your peril. I will love you, first in my heart, forever. As God is my witness, I give you this ring as my promise; herein I plight my troth."
They slid the rings home, and joined their left hands. I laid my own hand upon theirs as I read the pronouncement and benediction.
Those whom God has joined together, let no man put asunder. Forasmuch as Emmett and Rosalie have consented together in holy wedlock, and have witnessed the same here before God and this company; and thereto have given and pledged their troth either to the other, and have declared the same by giving and receiving rings, and by joining of hands: I pronounce that they be man and wife together. In the name of the Father, of the Son, and of the Holy Ghost. Amen. God the Father bless you. God the Son keep you. God the Holy Ghost lighten your understanding. The Lord mercifully with His favor look upon you, and so fill you with all spiritual benediction, and grace, that you may have remission of your sins in this life, and the world to come, life everlasting. Amen.
The chapel was silent; Emmett and Rosalie were frozen again, staring at one another in wonder. "Emmett, you may kiss your bride," I said with a gentle laugh.
He grinned hugely, lifting her veil and kissing her soundly. We all applauded, and I nudged the happy couple to turn and face their family, who applauded louder. After Kate's camera had been satisfied, we all took to the dance floor. First Edward played a couple of special songs, and then he shifted into a slow waltz. I tapped Emmett's shoulder, and after offering him my congratulations, I took my daughter in my arms.
"Thank you, Carlisle," she murmured into my shoulder. "Everything was perfect."
I spun her gently around, smiling at the moon's radiance on her skin. "A beautiful evening, for a beautiful bride," I told her. "I am so happy for you both, Rosalie. Truly."
We danced two more songs. All at once Rosalie was pulled out of my arms, to be replaced by Esme. I gathered her close to me, breathing in her scent.
"A fine sermon, Father Cullen," she said with sparkling eyes. "Especially considering it was your first."
"There's a first time for everything, Mrs. Cullen."
I pulled her face into my shoulder, but she turned to speak again. "He would have been proud," she said quietly.
I laughed, tucking her head under my chin. "I hope so. Though I hardly think he would have approved of my innovations. Especially the part about vengeance and death!"
"Only because he wouldn't have understood."
I nodded, my thoughts growing dark. "Esme, if anything should ever happen to me…"
She shivered in my arms, but looked up confidently. "If death take you, I will avenge and follow you. I will love you, first in my heart, forever."
I stilled our dancing, taking her face in my hands. I wished I could have given her some human platitude… extracted a promise that she would try to move on, that she would feel free to find love again.
But we were not human. I would not belittle her love like that. I couldn't.
"If death take you, I will avenge and follow you, Esme," I whispered reverently. "I will love you, first in my heart, forever."
We stared at each other, frozen, as the others danced around us. When we awoke, Edward was playing a different song. We began dancing again, turning to watch him as he played. Esme was missing the rhythm as she focused on her son.
"He will find her someday," I promised her. "I have no doubt."
Esme's forehead wrinkled in worry, but she smiled, still watching him. "I hope so," she sighed. "He has so much love to give." Her gaze moved over our families. Rosalie and Emmett were glued together in their own little world. Eleazar and Carmen were performing some complicated step, and the sisters were huddled together, giggling over something. Esme laid her head on my shoulder again.
"Have I ever thanked you for this life, Carlisle?" she asked dreamily.
"Only a few times," I said with a quiet chuckle.
"Thank you."
I pressed a kiss to her forehead, wishing I could weep. There were times when this life brought me great sorrow. But today, I felt only joy. My life was so full, so unexpectedly full. I glanced up into Heaven as I danced with my wife, swaying slower and slower; we had all the time in the world.
Thank you.