Chapter Fourteen

Friday 19th March 1982

They had brought the camp bed upstairs and put it next to Remus'. Remus still insisted Sirius took the proper bed, and Sirius couldn't help but feel it was because that way he was trapped between Remus and the wall.

He was improving. He woke screaming half as often as he had for the past two months, his skin no longer burned with fever and the cough was reducing. His voice was still hoarse, but he insisted it was sexy and should stay. The Lupins rolled their eyes at him, but he could tell both of them were pleased to hear him joke.

The daily visits from Aurors were dull and monotonous. Lyall was starting to lose patience with them too, cups of tea no longer offered. Sirius was grateful to from that. He was hazy, still, on how much Lyall knew and did not know, how much of their breakup he had been told about. But aside from being marginally more interested in feeding him up than he used to be, Lyall still treated Sirius as his much loved – albeit in the gruff Scottish way Sirius adored – son-in-law.

They hadn't talked about it. He could feel Remus' pain like it was his own. Neither of them wanting to move first, in fear of rejection. They slept, together, tangled in long limbs, breathing each other in. When the memories or nightmares got too close, they held each other. There had been more kisses. Some formed from old habit – Sirius catching Remus' hand in a quick moment as Remus brushed past, others – Remus' fingers caught hard in Sirius' hair, trapping him against his chest and kissing the terror away. Sirius did not dare hope, even as he could feel the tiny kindling of emotion under his ribs, he doused it in ice. Because it was today.

Because he might be sent back.

Feet on the stairs woke him. He did not need to open his eyes to know Remus had got up, which was fairly normal these days.

Sirius took a deep breath, this is Rowan cottage, I'm with Remus, this is real. The same mantra six, eight, a hundred times a day when the shadows crowded in close and he couldn't be certain he had ever left Azkaban.

But the footsteps were not Remus'. Nor were they Lyall, or either of the Prewetts. Too heavy to be Dorcus too. Sirius pushed himself up as the door opened, making it to sitting with sheer force of will and for the millionth time reaching for a wand that wasn't there. He froze.

James Potter smiled at him from the doorway, 'Alright Padfoot?'

Sirius tore the blanket from his legs and threw himself forwards across Remus' bed. His feet tangled in the sheets and he toppled forward, hands breaking his fall as he wrenched them free and staggered into the man he called brother.

'James.' He croaked, and James wrapped his arms around Sirius too, hugging back just as hard as Sirius was hugging him.

'Steady on mate.' James wheezed as Sirius crushed him.

'Not a chance.' Sirius loosened his grip slightly all the same, he could feel how much thinner the smaller man was, his mind supplying the image of his best friend crumpled in the lounge doorway at Godric's Hollow. 'Lily? Harry?'

'Lil's downstairs, with Harry.' James' voice was calm, soft. He had spoken to Sirius like that before, after school holidays and bad nights. It made Sirius smile. 'Godric though, you're thin.'

Sirius chuckled, smothering a cough, and stepped back, 'I could say the same, scrawny git.' His eyes brushed the start of James' scar, beginning under his chin and disappearing under the collar of his shirt. Sirius raised an eyebrow at James' smart grey tie, 'Muggle?'

'Yeah, all my good robes were in the house and… well it's a bit of a state. Besides, Lily hates formal robes, this way we all match.'

Sirius nodded.

James must have caught something microscopic in his face, 'We swung by the flat,' He picked up an awfully familiar looking Gryffindor Quidditch Team hold-all, 'I brought you some options.'

With help from James, Sirius managed to dress in the Savile Row suit. Neat, black, and slim, matched with a grey waistcoat and shirt. James passed him the deep, Gryffindor red tie. Sirius let his mind go blank and his hands weave the double four-in-hand knot instinctively.

'It's a bit big…' James sounded unsure behind him.

Sirius turned and smiled, 'Good. Let them see what they've done.'

'Padfoot,' James' voice took on a warning tone now, 'You have to play this – '

'I know James.' Sirius could hear the hard edge in his voice, even under the roughness, 'I know. I must sit there and be tortured and be polite. So, let me have a little spite now, before I have to be docile and law-abiding.'

Prongs smiled, 'I've missed you.'

'And I you.' Sirius dragged a ghost of his old grin onto his face, 'Come on,'

He managed the stairs in one go, testimony to Lyall's Scottish fare, and James – coming behind him – must have given Lily the nod over his head because he had barely touched the floor when she barrelled into his arms in a cloud of flaming red hair.

Sirius rocked on the spot with the impact but held her no less firmly than he had James. She smelt of herbs, and sunshine and flowers. He breathed her in, tangling the trailing ends of her curls loosely in his fingers.

She took a ragged breath, and he smiled, 'Hush Evans. It's alright.'

She mumbled something into his chest.

'What was that love?'

She peeled back, green eyes sparkling, 'I said it's not fucking alright and don't bloody Evans me.'

He grinned then, for her, 'But of course,' His formal accent springing forth and by the gods did he sound like Orion now, with his voice so worn and low, 'Whatever you wish Mrs Potter.'

'Good Merlin Sirius!' Lily swatted him, very lightly on the arm and then smiled, 'It's so good to see you.'

'It'll be better this afternoon.' Remus' calm voice came from the living room and Sirius looked up to see the love of his life holding his – their – godson.

He side-stepped Lily and crossed the room, cupping a hand to the back of Harry's head.

'Hello Prongslet.' He had grown, massively it seemed to Sirius, in the nearly five months since they had last seen each other.

'Ad-oot!' Harry beamed at him, lunging sideways out of Remus' arms at Sirius. He caught him, cuddling him tight to his shoulder.

'Touching. Give the boy back Black.'

Sirius fought the urge to vomit at the sound of Moody's voice. He said nothing, did not turn round. He planted a kiss on Harry's head, and then passed him back to Remus.

He caught the golden gleam in Remus' amber eyes and held his gaze for a moment, before asking, calmly, 'Are we all ready?'

'Yes.' Remus nodded.

'I still reckon Wizengamot is no place for the wee lad.' Moody complained, but was interrupted by another Scottish voice.

'This family is stopping together until it's all through Alasdair, whe'r or no ye greet ov'r it. Ye ken me big man?'

Lyall Lupin stomped in, in an old, but neat enough, tweed suit.

'Aye Lyall, tha e gu math.'

Mad-Eye moved toward Sirius, Sirius fought the urge to flinch, or run. He could feel the magic in his tattoos, in his blood, starting to stir and swirl. He flexed his wrist, a twisting motion that had James' finger curl around it.

'You good?' He muttered.

Sirius nodded, and slowly, so slowly, managed to raise his hands. Holding them out to Moody.

'Do it.'

The next hour was mostly cold, horrifying blur to Sirius. The shackles had been taken off at the Ministry once he was handed back to the Dementors. They seemed incredibly pleased to see him, and he had almost blacked out as they closed around him.

Lyall had stayed with him. An impartial observer. It was his steady honey brown gaze that Sirius clung to as they fed him potion after potion. Veritaserum he knew of old, the haziness it brought did not bother him. He had thought his powers were barely beginning to return, but it took three doses of the Power Suppression Potion before they were happy. The Auror under Moody's watch administering them seemed to be hovering on the idea of a fourth when Lyall waved his wand for a diagnostic charm.

'That's enough. Anymore and you risk permanent damage.'

Moody gave the nod and they moved on.

The Auror pressed his wand to Sirius' temple, demanding he surrender his memories of Halloween, of the decision to make Peter Secret Keeper, of the battle at Marlene's flat. Sirius let them flow, no longer trying to stop the shudders that ripped through his body. He felt sick, exhausted and his teeth chattered in the cold and the lack of magic.

'What else lad?'

Sirius shook his head, shaking hard now, 'I… am… innocent.'

The chair in the courtroom chained him in place, but at least the Dementors left.

Sirius wanted to pull his knees up to his chest, curl in on himself. But he was a Black. No, fuck that, he was Sirius 'Padfoot' Black. He forced himself to sit straight in the chair, feet flat on the floor and dragged his eyes up the banked seats to meet with those of Amelia Bones. He remembered her, a Ravenclaw a few years above them. He knew Edgar better of course. Before.

She held his gaze, she looked calm.

'Sirius Orion Black, this court has been convened to hear your appeal against your sentence of life imprisonment in Azkaban – '

He shook his head, interrupting, 'I am contesting my conviction, not just my internment.' How he kept the tremor from his voice even he did not know. Years of Black Family training probably. 'I am innocent.'

Bones nodded, 'Yes. Of course.' She gestured to the Wizengamot seated around her, 'We have had the chance to view your memories.'

Sirius forced his eyes to stay fixed on her. Even then, his hazy, swimming, peripheral vision supplied the role-call of family glaring down at him. Lucius Malfoy, he'd some how escaped Azkaban; Ignatius Prewett, he wasn't so bad at least; Uncle Cygnus, towards the back and stifling a cough in a dark green handkerchief. He couldn't avoid seeing the men sitting on either side of Bones though. He met Dumbledore's eyes, because the alternative was his Grandfather.

'Professor Dumbledore is here to assess your answers for truthfulness. He will be using Legilimency.'

Sirius bit down hard on his cheek to keep from laughing. He forced himself to nod, 'I understand. And give my consent.'

There was muttering from the gallery. Sirius had no legal right to withhold consent, just as he had no legal right to trial to begin with. He didn't care.

'This court calls Mr. Black's first witness, James Charlus Potter.'

James walked smoothly into the court. He strode across the sunken floor and stood, firmly at Sirius side.

'You are James Charlus Potter, twenty-one, most recently of Godric's Hollow?'

'I am.'

'And you are one of the emergency trained Aurors in the Department of Magical Law Enforcement?'

James nodded, 'I was. Until a few months ago when my family had to go into hiding to escape Voldemort.' They didn't like that either, James spoke over the muttering, 'It is my intention to return to the Ministry once my family is safe and our homes rebuilt.'

Bones tilted her head in surprise, 'Homes? This court was under the impression only the cottage in Godric's Hollow was damaged?'

'The Ministry did a fairly impressive job of turning over Mr Black's flat. He is part of my family.'

'Your sentiment does you credit Mr. Potter, if indeed it is the case that Mr. Black feels the same way about you and did not commit the crimes he is currently considered guilty of.'

James gave a curt nod, 'It is the case, Madame Bones. I am here today to give my testimony that Sirius Black was not my family's Secret Keeper. This is the absolute truth. Even if Sirius had betrayed us, which I do not believe, it would have been impossible for him to give away our location.'

Bones made a note on the parchment before her, 'You statement appears to be parallel with the memories taken from Mr. Black today. However, it has been suggested that Mr. Black may have manipulated your memories to line up with his account.'

'I haven't seen Sirius before today since the autumnal equinox, he stayed at the house in Godric's Hollow from the 22nd to the 24th.'

'And have you been alone with him at any point?'

Sirius fought the urge to roll his eyes, shift, make a biting comment.

'Yes. I helped Sirius get dressed this morning. My wand was downstairs with my wife, and Sirius has none of his own.' James gestured towards the far side of the gallery, 'Chief Auror Alastor Moody was present in the house, along with my wife, son, and the Lupin family. Mr Lyall Lupin has been supervising Sirius since his release from Azkaban.'

Bones made another note, 'Mr. Black also has been convicted of the murders of the McKinnon family and of Peter Pettigrew. Do you have any evidence to present on these matters Mr. Potter?'

'Yes. I was the first DLE officer into the McKinnon flat. I can absolutely testify to the fact that Sirius did not lay a finger on any of them.'

She waved for him to go on.

'I reported this at the time, it was my last mission before we went at the time. When I arrived, Remus Lupin was attempting healing magic on Marlene's cousin, the six-year-old Emma McKinnon. Sirius was in the bedroom. The Death Eaters had taken Marlene and her partner, a muggle, in there before torturing and killing them. The blood on the floor and bed was already starting to congeal. The bodies were cold. There was no way Sirius had chance to do anything in the moments before we arrived.' James was staring straight ahead, repeating a report that Sirius knew he would never forget, 'Sirius was holding what was left of Marlene, he was distraught.'

'That could have been an act?'

Sirius froze.

'No. Sorry, but anyone who thinks he can feign that has never met Sirius.' James shook his head, 'The distress was genuine. Marlene was one of Sirius' best friends. He set her up with her Muggle partner in the first place.'

Sirius fought the smirk, if helping her pick out the prettiest bi girl in the gay club was setting them up.

'And Mr. Pettigrew?'

James cleared his throat, 'We chose Peter Pettigrew as our Secret Keeper. If anyone betrayed my family, it was him.'

'Please answer the question Mr. Potter.'

'I was unconscious, after Voldemort's attack. I have no personal evidence of Sirius' whereabouts.'

'Thank you, Mr. Potter, that is all.'

James reached out and squeezed Sirius' shoulder. Sirius turned to face him and nodded. He almost wished James hadn't done it. But he supposed it looked good.

'Do you have anything to add, Mr. Black?'

'Yes.' Sirius straightened again, 'I had nothing to do with whatever may or may not have happened to Peter Pettigrew,' He had to stop to clear his throat, his voice weakening. He was so tired, 'I went to Peter's to check on him, as arranged. You know, because he was our friend, part of our family,' He blinked, trying to keep on track, to stay civil, 'Peter wasn't there. I knew something was wrong, so I went straight to the Potter's – '

'It is my understanding you arrived in Godric's Hollow on a motorbike?'

Sirius nodded, 'Yes. My bike. When I –'

'Why was that?'

'What? Why is that relevant?' Sirius could hear the frustration in his tone. It sounded entitled, haughty. Not what he should be doing.

'I simply wondered why you did not Apparate. The Ministry has a record of your obtaining a Licence to Apparate in April 1977?'

Sirius swallowed, 'I don't like to Apparate.'

'And why is that? Surely if you were worried about your friends you would have wanted to get there as soon as possible?'

'I did. I had a bad experience with Apparition as a child, I avoid it were possible. Especially when I am distressed or otherwise emotional.' He finally met Pollux's eyes, 'The Mr. Black beside you can confirm this.'

She barely glanced his way, and Pollux nodded. Another note was added to the parchment.

'And when you arrived at Godric's Hollow?'

'Voldemort had already been. The house was destroyed. I ran past James, I saw him but didn't stop. I am not the best healer. In the nursery,' he stopped himself to explain, 'I knew it was the nursery because I saw the wallpaper on the rubble.' Bones nodded again, 'I grabbed Harry, he was screaming. The Hagrid arrived, and I checked Lily. She was still breathing so I floated her down to wait for the healers with James. I Apparated us.'

'But a moment a go you said...?' She let her voice trail away meaningfully.

'Harry was injured, I needed to get him to hospital as fast as possible, and I didn't want to be away from Lily and James.' He shook his head, 'And it was that or hand Harry over to someone else, and drive for at least an hour.'

'Go on.'

'I was in St. Mungo's with all three Potters until I was arrested by Auror Moody. That was the last I saw any of them until this morning. I did not go after Peter, I did not attack the McKinnons, I did not go over to Voldemort's side. I am innocent.'

He couldn't suppress the shudder that time. The edges of his vision were swirling, cloudy and black.

'The Wizengamot will recess to discuss the evidence presented, and to receive Professor Albus Dumbledore's report.' Bones looked down at Sirius, 'The prisoner will remain here, under the guard of Aurors. Not the Dementors.'

It wasn't until his grandfather stood and turned away that Sirius let himself slump back against the hard chair. His sight fading as a flash of red, and a darker, taller shape ran across the floor towards him.

Everything went dark.