A whump prompt I did for October cuz I never really did one. This one is like saved from a life of experimentation.

Warning for mentions of injury and abuses

Your eyes open. The bed shifted suddenly and disturbed you. You are met with torso. Upon looking up you see your master is awake. He's looking down at you confused and flushed. In response you smile.

"Are you okay?" He asks slowly.

You nod.

"Bad dream or something?"

You shake your head. You crawled into his bed because you wanted to.

Jiraiya rubs his eyes with his palm before sighing. You gotta stop doing this to him. It's not good to be so attached to someone simply because… he saved you. Well that's a bad way to put it but there's no real good way to say it.

Invading a base of Orochimaru yielded some results. He may not have been there but he left behind things. Including you. There were other experiments there as well. Unfortunately the last one brought into hospital died last night. They were all so close to death upon discovery. You were no exception.

By pure chance Jiraiya happened to find you. He was going through with a team clearing rooms. The trail was hot but to not sweep the base would be a mistake. Clues. Goods. Anything that could help in the capture or killing of Orochimaru. He was determined to find something. He didn't expect you.

He opened the door to another room. This one at least looked more important. With a steel reinforced door and a lock installed it had to be something. It seems the raid happened so quickly that Orochimaru had only managed to half lock the door. It took hitting it with his shoulder and bending the frame to get it to yield.

The smell of blood, rot, and death was heavy in the room. Enough to have bile crawl at the back of his throat but he choked it down. He's got a job to do no matter how gory. There's an abandoned corpse on a metal slab. Other than that there were metal surgery tools and beakers full of liquids ranging from clear to dark muddy red. After confirming that the person on the slab was dead he planned to move on. This was only a nasty hack room. Then something moved out of the corner of his eye.

It was a cabinet door that was among a line of others against the wall. A foot curled back inside of the storage area. Heavy shaky breathing sounded from the area. Someone was in there alright and they sound afraid.

Jiraiya tried to coax you out at first. He told you that he wasn't going to hurt you so long as you come out. He leaned down to get a good look and nearly lost his eye. You came out swinging, holding a scalpel and getting close enough to make the air around his eye whistle as the blade sliced it. He moved back just in time and grabbed your wrist.

You surprised him with a good couple of gut punches with your free hand. You aren't properly trained but got some experience that's for sure. You put up a struggle but a mixture of pre-existing factors quickly weakened you. All you had on was tattered shapeless shirt and pants that barely fit. Blood began to seep through the thin fabric at your chest and back. There was a hollowness to your cheeks and exhaustion in your eyes. You were desperate and hurt.

After you collapsed, he sorta just… scooped you up. Once inspected it became clear what had happened just before the raid. You were being sliced open and possibly experimented on when the Leaf invaded your operation was abruptly cut off. You weren't even bandaged up. You threw your shirt on and hid away out of self preservation.

The hits kept coming when someone recognized you. You are a denizen of Konoha. Or was at a point. Upon investigating some missing persons files a child version of your face came up and you responded as expected to your name. You went missing on a mission headed out from the village and into the Land of Fire close to the border. Given the timing it was either human trafficking or Orochimaru's lot got you.

But upsettingly when your parents came to visit you in the hospital you didn't recognize them. You had no memory of them. You didn't want to be near them. You got out of bed and trotted to Jiraiya. He held his hands up in surrender as you wrapped your arms around him and said you'd rather stay with him. He didn't want to touch you due to your parents staring at him like he did something to convince you of this. He didn't. He wouldn't ever dream of treating another person like this. This wasn't his idea.

Without much choice, for your comfort and rehabilitation Jiraiya was put in charge of you. He had to drop almost everything for you. It sucks but… he'd hate to abandon you. You have nothing. Not even the memories of your happy childhood. All you really got is him.

You sat up and straddled his waist. You don't have any clothing of your own at the moment. The ones you currently have on is the very first one he gave you. Since it was very late by the time he got housing sorted out and moved in there were no shops and he forgot to ask for something at the hospital. So he gave you his pyjama shirt and showed you to one of the rooms. He managed to get two bedrooms. You gotta learn that it's okay to have your own space.

Shame on him but it's really cute to see someone smaller than him wear his stuff. You're so tiny in comparison to him that his stuff barely stays on your frame. You shouldn't be on him like this though. As much as he wants to take care of you, the idea of sex with you makes him shudder.

Not because you're unattractive or anything. You're very cute. The thing is that it's very clear how you view the act. It's not for you or your pleasure. It's for your master. What you endured…

"Don't you want me, master?" You whisper.

"I'm not your master."

He sat up and gently pushed you off. You tilt your head curiously and frown. He must be your master. He houses you. He feeds you. He takes care of you.

"You're so nice to me." You say.

You rest your head on his shoulder. Yours fingers run down his chest. He's warm. Before you could get too comfortable he picked you up and set you on your feet out of bed.

"Why don't you go take a shower?"

"Is that what you want me to do?"

He hesitates a moment. But does nod. You have old blood and ointment smell on you. A nice long shower is a good start to recovering. He ushered you to the bathroom and let you be to relax with the warm water. He left to the kitchen to start off his day more properly.

At least there's a coffee maker in this place. And his ground coffee he brings with him while on the road. Sometimes inn coffee sucks. The old machine sputters and hisses with the effort of making coffee but it does get made. Alas there's no mugs.

With a sigh Jiraiya rinsed out a bowl and poured his drink in that. Today he ought to buy some basic stuff. Just enough to get by with ease. He turned around with his bowl of coffee and nearly dropped it. He span back on his heel.

"I said to shower!" He sputters.

"Without you, master?"

You are bare ass naked in the kitchen, clueless. As if he wasn't already in enough trouble as it is taking you on. If anyone looked into the window and saw this he'd be knifed down by your father!

"Yes! Go now! You can figure out the knobs yourself." He barks at you.

"Oh…"

You sound very disappointed and confused. You must have done at least something normal alone. You patter away back to the bathroom and the water turned on a moment later. Jiraiya sighs deeply… again. He caught a glimpse. It's just…. Sad.

The wounds, marks, and scars all over your body. All of them a mixture of things. Self defence marks on your arms. Stabs and lacerations to your torso. Incisions down your chest. It's awful. You've been abused to all hell. And these are just the recent ones. There's no telling what invisible marks remains.

While you get clean Jiraiya drinks his bowl then gets dressed. He put a set of clothing out for you on your bed. Again he had jack all for you other than his own things. So he got you a set of his clothing. The shoulders will be a bit big but it's coverage that isn't your old bloody garb from that hell hole he found you in.

With eyes half squeezed shut he pushed towel wrapped you to your room and shut the door. He didn't hear you move.

"Orders?" You ask.

He sighs yet again. Poor thing. You should know what to do. You clearly have incentive. But perhaps you were trained to hide if someone came snooping around.

"Get dressed… please."

"Okay!"

In a few moments you had the door open and wearing what he had set out. It is very big on you but it's kinda cute. Not just kinda. It's very cute. You opted not to wear the pants. Which he understands. His kosode is big enough to cover you like a kimono normally would. Plus the hakama would just slide off your hips and bunch up at your ankles.

"What now, master?" You ask.

"I'm not your master." He reminds. "We're going shopping."

Your expression dropped. Confusion and fear riddles your face.

"I… I'm not supposed to go outside."

"Why not?"

It feels wrong to ask. There's an awful reason isn't there?

"It's dangerous. Someone could…" You trail off as you repeat the words that were spoken to you over and over. "Hurt me."

"Hurt you? No one is going to do that."

You remain still and contemplating for a moment before smiling softly. You step forward and wrap your arms around him.

"Because I have you." You whisper. "I'm sorry. I didn't fail did I?"

"I wasn't testing you."

You raise your head to look at him with a blank expression. It's a concept you don't understand. What an awful life you must have lived. Where you can't even speak without fear of it being wrong. The consequences of that unfair act must have been painful. You flinch occasionally when his hands come near your face.

You have no shoes… crap. It seems cruel to make you walk bare foot until he got you to a shop. Bridal feels too… sexual of a hold. Like he's setting you up for something. Piggy back it is.

Your hands rest on his shoulders from behind. Your legs dangle by his waist as he holds onto the back of your thighs. He carries you out around the village, ignoring the odd stares that pass his way. First stop shoes!

You are an easy person to please. Upon being presented with a pair of simple cheap sandals you were ecstatic. You kicked your legs happily as you sat on the bench in the shop, admiring the shoes. The clerk turned red as they caught sight of something and quickly left. Jiraiya cringes as he sees that your clothing is ill fitting and had split open in a way to show off the goods. You aren't shy per say.

Once paid for you walked beside him in the streets to the next stop. Clothes. Which immediately started off weird. People were looking at him like he is what he is. A perv. It's awkward as all hell. But you're desperately in need of a real wardrobe.

"What do you like?" He asks.

"Whatever you like, master."

"I'm not your master."

You don't let on in a robust way. You are subtle but you do like things. With your arms wrapped around his as you and him walk around the sections of clothing you slow down and stare. So he picks it up. You don't react beyond a small smile.

The worst part was the under garments. You had no clue what you wanted. You stare at underwear like you never saw them before. And people are stopping and double taking at the sight of you and him. So to get this painful moment done with he grabbed what he thinks will fit you best and be comfortable. The awkwardness continued as the cashier stared at him as she checked the items out. It was daggers. He's not doing anything dirty! He wants you to be comfortable. Why is that so hard to believe?!

You cling to him. Cuddling against his arm.

"Thank you, master. I love all my new things." You say.

"I'm not your master."

You don't say anything back. Just hold him tighter. He bought you things. He homed you. He must be your master. You just hope you can please him.

"Go get changed. We'll go back out."

"Okay."

You skipped to your room. Then came back out dressed in the first thing that caught your eye back in the store. It was a kimono composed of similar colours he wears, with this one being a muted pale green. But it was more patterned. It has a soft pattern of checkers that's only a shade different from each other. You look nice.

You grabbed his hand and followed him back out to the outside. It wasn't so scary with him. He bought you lunch. It was delicious. It must have been. He watched you inhale it.

"Tasty?" He asks.

You nod. Today you learned you enjoyed fried chicken. You crawled to his side in the restaurant and cuddled up to him. You are very affectionate at inappropriate times. It's always when he does something for you…. Oh.

"You don't owe me anything." Jiraiya told you quietly. He looks around, making sure no one is dropping in on the conversation. "I won't hurt you. Ever. You know that don't you?"

You stare at him. For the first time it seems to have sunk in. A grin grows on your face. You held his arm hostage again and rest your head on his shoulder.

For the first time in your life you felt safe.

After lunch the much more boring task of shopping for dishes came about. Thankfully Konoha has a dollar store. And they sell plates and all its companions by the item. He wanted to just get two of each but sometimes he uses more than one cup a day. Also someone could maybe stay for dinner or something. Or maybe two people.

Okay it was kinda fun to buy these things. The last time he shopped for stuff like this was when he was a teenager getting his own place for the first time. It was a great time shopping with his friends who had also moved out and were living as cheaply as they could too. It's a rite of passage for any youth. Shame you missed it. You aren't as enthusiastic as he was. Although you do seem to be having a good time looking over the seasonal things with confusion and fascination. He doesn't want to think he's moving back. This is all temporary. Maybe this will all be yours one day.

The day continues with shopping for groceries. Which you didn't like. You don't like crowds all smooched so close together in a space. It's a peak hour for shopping in the market so it's packed. Much more packed than all the other places he took you today. You held onto him tighter than normal. You averted your eyes when people came close. You down right refused to speak, interact, or look when one of his friends came up to speak to him. It's like you took a hundred steps back today in terms of progress.

"Are you alright?"

"I don't wanna be parted from you."

"I won't let that happen. Let's go, okay?"

You nod. With the small selection of groceries in hand, Jiraiya pays and leaves with you. You held onto one of the bags. It was nice to have his arm free for a time. That was the last errand for the day. You and him went back to the apartment and put the shopping away. It's enough to get by for a few days.

"I'll go to the market alone next time." He announces.

"I'm sorry." You whisper.

"Don't be. I pushed you today and I think you did great."

As he said that he looked over his shoulder at you with a smile. It's true. You did better than he thought you would. You made it through this whole day with no major relapse. A pleased smile grew on your face at hearing his praise.

You lean against against the counter as you watch him make dinner. He's not a classy chef by any means but he knows how to make a couple of decent dishes. Like vegetable curry. It's not his favourite thing in the world but it's cheap and not that hard to make. With sticky rice it's a filling meal for on a budget.

You took a bite. Jiraiya chuckles at watching your expressions. He made it very mild since you told him that the only food you remember eating your whole life was rice. By how you described the taste it must have been rancid. How could anyone treat someone else so poorly? The prisoners that live literally in a volcano eat better than you did.

"It… tingles." You say.

"Did I make it too spicy? Can you eat it?"

You frown and take another bite. You keep chewing on the bite slowly. You must be unsure about it. But you keep eating it. It must taste good in some capacity if you aren't turning it away.

To give your tongue a break he got ice cream at the store. Again you were surprised and intrigued with the taste. You suck on it while staring at him. Suddenly he's staring. His face is hot.

There's no denying that he's attracted to you. You're beautiful, scars and all. It's what makes you more you and that's not a bad thing. You're already proving that these marks and your past don't have to define you. The best part is that you are improving even if it is only little baby steps. Seeing someone grow beyond their past is… kinda hot. You are more than this and you are finally understanding that.

Before Jiraiya really knew it, his hand reached out and he touched your cheek. You haven't been showed gentle loving attention in a very long time. You didn't flinch away. Your face gets hot. Your eyes are locked with his. You lean into it and smile.

"Your hand." You whisper. "It's nice."

"That's… alright." He didn't have much to say to that. It felt good to hear you say that.

"I'm tired…"

"Then go to bed. I'll see you in the morning."

"You're alright with that?"

"More than."

Slowly his fingers slip away from your skin. You go to your room. Jiraiya cleaned up and stayed up for a while. He didn't do much. He tried to write but he thought about you. His train of thought was too short to stay on his task. So he went bed.

A few moments after he put the light out his bed dipped. You are joining him again.

"You should sleep in your own room." Jiraiya said.

You froze as you realize you have been caught in the act. Then you lay down anyways beside him. Your hand rubs up his arm then his shoulder. You caress his chest and stop at the other side so that you are holding him.

"I like being near you…" You whisper. "I feel… safe beside you."

"You should feel safe with the person taking care of you."

"Then…"

Your leg slides over his waist and you roll to lay over top of him. Your big doe like eyes look at him in the dark as your hips shift eagerly.

"Won't you fuck me? You said I was good today."

Jiraiya put his arms around you. You scooted closer and your lips press against his. He moved away, not wanting to reward this.

"It's not a reward. You shouldn't be having sex until you realize that."

"But…"

Your brows go down in confusion and sorrow. You want it but the context is still weird. It's no secret. You made it plain from the day he was assigned to take care of you. Sex was violently used against you. It's a tool for control. You were abused by people wanting to see you suffer for the sake of it or for small non problems blown out of proportion.

"Has anyone ever taken the time to pleasure you?"

The question sorta just came out. You endured a lifetime of selfish people hurting you for their own pleasure. You were so conditioned to the violence you thought it to be love. You did so much to please these… people, who saw you as nothing more than a tool.

"It's always a pleasure to be chosen by my master." You reply. "If they get off from using me then my role is fulfilled."

"That's not what I asked." Jiraiya said. He held onto you as he rolled over so you are underneath him. "And I'm not your master."

You look him over slowly. Today had showed you one thing. Jiraiya is a gentle trustworthy man. He never took advantage of you. He didn't hit or yell. He wants you to be better. Your thoughts trail off to your past. If you had spent a day like this with one of your old masters than it would've gone differently. You'd be forced to walk on the hot spiky road in bare feet. You would've been told what to wear. Told if you deserved to eat. Hit for staring. Yelled at for being afraid. He's awaiting your answer.

"What… would you do to me?" You ask.

"I'd make you feel good."

"You've done that since we've been together."

"No. This is a different kind of good."

You wrap your arms around the back of his neck and use it for leverage. You pull yourself up to close to his lips and smile. He's been so sweet this whole time. Surely you can ask?

"Could you show me?"

"On one condition."

"What?"

"Who am I?"

You're beginning to understand him. His hand teases you by running up your thigh. Tingles of something you haven't felt this strongly before run along in his wake. Your fingers clutch onto him tighter. The answer is clear.

"You aren't my master." You reply.

A soft chuckle rocks the older man above you. Jiraiya finds that answer amusing but accurate. It's what he wanted to hear. Your body lays flat against his mattress again as he leaned down to kiss you. As he did his fingers began to feel and rub you through your pyjamas.

Soft moans and calls regularly make its way out of you. It is unlike anything you have felt before. It's still tingly. It's also hot and wet. Surges of something good keep rocking over you to the stroke of his hand against your sex. When you tried to touch him he denies you.

"This is all about you." He whispered in your ear.

You cry out. If this is pleasure then you don't want it to stop! You whine and moan to the pace of Jiraiya's strokes. It's not long until you are overwhelmed. Your nails dig into him. You go rigid. Your mouth hangs open as you can neither breathe in or out.

"M.. M-More!" You gasp. You hold his face with your hands and beg. "More Jiraiya!"

"You said my name."

You nod and rush your head forward. Your lips met his in a heated messy kiss. It's hard to kiss him when he's grinning. You don't really understand why he's so pleased with himself.

"I'll show you more. Don't you worry." He promises.

It's slow going but yeah. You're healing. It may be a little quick to be doing this but you are asking for more. It would be rude not to fulfill such a request.

And so Jiraiya shows you pleasure all night long!