Hermione and the Doctor tumbled back into the TARDIS and the ship slammed the door shut behind them.
"Will these doors hold?" Hermione asked worriedly. The exhaustion was evident in her voice as she stood there and dripped green goo down onto the grating. The Doctor reassured her as he went immediately to the console to send the TARDIS into the Vortex and out of harm's way.
"I will have you know that the assembled hordes of Genghis Khan couldn't get through those doors, and believe me, they've tried…" he explained while Hermione just shook her head at him.
"Why? Did you get them covered in giant slug slime, too?" she retorted reproachfully. However, a twinkle of amusement had returned to her eyes once she knew for sure that they were out of danger. In fact, the whole situation currently seemed quite ridiculous to her in retrospect. "This planet…at this time…is very safe," she said in a slightly mocking sing-song voice as she parroted the Doctor's words from earlier while she also tried to wring the worst of the slime out of her hair. With a look of disgust on her face, though, she finally gave up and pulled out her wand.
"Tergeo," she said loudly as she pointed her it at the Doctor.
He saw what she was doing and immediately threw his hands up in a half-hearted defense. "Now Hermione, how could I possibly know that the migration…" He stopped talking, however, with sudden amazement as he realized that he was no longer covered in goo. He was still sticky, but completely slime-free. He looked up quickly and was just in time to see her turn the wand on herself and siphon off the slime located there with the same spell, as well. Then he watched gratefully as she did the same for the mess they had made on the grating in the console room.
"I'm so sorry, TARDIS dear," she apologized to the ship. "I hope that you know that this wasn't my fault!" Her sentient friend responded reassuringly with a wave of goodwill and forgiveness. The TARDIS knew very well whose fault it was because it certainly was not the first time that he had done something to violate the sanctum of her console room with some kind of filth…and she seriously doubted that it would be the last time, either.
Meanwhile, the Doctor just shook his head at Hermione, the TARDIS, and the mess as wondered how such a promising day had gone so wrong.
Their trip had started out so pleasantly. The Doctor and Hermione had taken advantage of the extra-long Barcelona day and walked the short distance to the town and its market. However, most of the view was lost on the Doctor since he was completely engaged in watching Hermione fondly as she practically skipped with the excitement of actually finding herself visiting another planet…for fun!
When they arrived at their destination, Hermione quietly marveled at the perfect beauty of the native people there. The Doctor proceeded to explain that by the 51st century, humans had mastered both genetic manipulation and engineering. Therefore, they had long healthy life spans and could basically look any way that they chose to at any stage of their life. The Doctor then reminded her that the Nutristrips that she had taken during her recovery were developed in the 51st century – which is why they worked so quickly and efficiently for her. Instead of reassuring her, however, all of this news seemed to worry Hermione a little.
"Won't we stand out then? Well…you are quite nice looking, so you might pass as a native. However, there is no way that anyone could mistake me for one of the perfect-looking inhabitants!" she exclaimed enviously, as she tried to smooth down the unruly hair that was already rapidly escaping from its ponytail.
Even while his hearts leaped because she had once again called him attractive, he realized that she had no idea how pretty she was herself. The men back in her old life must have been really stupid apes to not have noticed that simple and obvious fact…or not to have told her as frequently as possible. Well, he would set her straight on that point immediately!
"First of all, Hermione," he told her seriously, "the only difference that I see between their engineered beauty and your natural look is the fact that you are still a bit thin from your ordeal. However, as you continue to gain in strength and health, nobody will be able to distinguish you from one of these so-called perfect natives!" He noticed her pleased blush at his words, but he did not mention it because he did not want to embarrass her. "Plus, your hair looks beautiful…for a human, anyway," he added to lighten the moment. It must have worked because she stuck her tongue out at him.
He laughed at the childish gesture and continued, "Secondly, this is the 51st century, remember? Humans have not only mastered space travel themselves, hence their colonization of Barcelona, but they are also quite familiar with many other alien species who have done so, as well. Therefore, they are used to all kinds of people – including visitors to this planet. Consequently, even if we looked vastly different than them, they wouldn't even bat an eye at our presence. In fact, I will be very surprised it we don't run into several other sentient species before we leave today – especially since the markets of Barcelona are well known for hard-to-find interstellar ship parts. I haven't seen any visitors, yet, but the official visitors' parking lot is in the opposite direction from where we left the TARDIS. I'm sure that we will meet somebody interestin' when we get closer to that side of town."
Hermione was both reassured and touched by the Doctor's assertions…and she also could not help but to be excited by the thought of meeting even more alien species. It did not take her long to realize that he was correct, either! In fact, her very first alien interaction (besides the Doctor and the TARDIS, of course) occurred during their first stop – which just happened to be the tea merchant. There they picked out several exotic blends to treat themselves, as well as a few standard ones for their daily consumption. Hermione was quite amused to find out that basic Earl Grey was still around – even this far into the future. Then, just as they were exiting, it happened. Hermione accidentally bumped into the tall, blue-skinned, and four-armed man who had entered the shop at the same time as she tried to leave it. The alien seemed unconcerned, however, and smiled gently at her stammered apology.
"Nonsense! I am honored to be accosted by one of such beauty, gentle lady," he replied courteously - in what sounded like perfect English - until Hermione remembered that the TARDIS had probably translated for her. However, she still blushed profusely – especially when he bowed before he turned and continued on his way.
"Wow!" Hermione mumbled after he left, and her face was still flushed with pink for several minutes after the encounter.
Since he was not the one to put the blush there in the first place, the Doctor just glared at the alien's retreating back and muttered something disgustedly that sounded a lot like "mumble, mumble, blue pretty boy, mumble." Afterwards, however, when she had recovered from the experience, Hermione smiled up at him warmly…and all was forgiven. He simply offered her his arm and they continued on with their shopping. They visited several more vendors after that in order to pick up some basic supplies and replacement parts for the TARDIS. Along the way, they also ran into other extra-planetary visitors.
The Doctor was pleased to note that, after getting over the initial embarrassment of her first interaction, Hermione took the rest of the meetings in stride. She continued to walked arm in arm with him and he would occasionally lean over to whisper in her ear (and unbeknownst to him, made her shiver a little every time at the delicious feeling that it created against the sensitive skin there) in order to give her the name of a particular species or to offer helpful little hints about appropriate social interaction with them. This resulted in interesting little fragments of conversation such as "Try not to look the Slighun in the eye. That is considered a deadly insult!" or "Be sure to shake only the third finger, not the whole hand, of a Fimmley - or he will think that you are asking him to marry you."
Hermione took all of these suggestions to heart – especially when he steered her away from what looked like a giant bipedal weasel. "Felicities, despite their name, are not known for their sweet kind-hearted natures," he warned her. "Especially when it comes to females of a different species," he added meaningfully as he sent a warning glare back at the furry alien who watched Hermione with interest. The Felicity still looked like he was going to stand his ground…at first. Eventually he got the message, however, especially when the Doctor very purposely draped his arm protectively around the woman…all while he kept one fierce knowing eye on the alien. The Felicity then realized that this particular female had already been claimed by a formidable male…and therefore he wandered off to look elsewhere.
By unspoken agreement, however, the Doctor's arm stayed around Hermione until the couple stopped to eat lunch at a café where he finally...albeit reluctantly…deemed the situation safe enough to sever the close contact between them. Despite their mutual disappointment over the loss of each other's touch, they were soon distracted there when Hermione also finally met the acquaintance of several very friendly and, apparently insatiably hungry, members of the canine family for which Barcelona was famous. The dogs belonged to the owners of the establishment and roamed the café freely as they begged for treats from the diners. Hermione was completely entranced by their charms as they rubbed their noseless snouts all over her and wagged their tails happily. Therefore, she fed them several tidbits from her own plate, even though their rounded bellies proved that they did not need the extra food.
As Hermione stroked the ginger-colored fur of a particularly pudgy dog, though, her mind turned towards her beloved Crookshanks. She had no idea what had happened to him after she had left him with the Weasleys before she went on the Horcrux hunt. However, she knew that he was an excellent hunter and could take care of himself - as his battle scars attested. Plus, the intelligent feline had probably already charmed his way into another household. That thought relieved her mind a bit. However, she still missed him immensely. The Doctor noticed the unshed tears that gleamed in her eyes as she bent down to give the dog a hug and to tell him to be a good boy as they left. He then realized that she must have remembered a special animal, perhaps even a pet, from her home. He was a smart man and knew from experience that sometimes the little losses could hurt just as much as the big ones. Therefore, he was happy to see that she was able to smile a little when the dog licked her cheek as she turned away. However, when the little witch remained a bit subdued for the rest of their walk, the Doctor understood and just tried to keep up a cheerful commentary for her to help keep her mind off things.
By that time, the Doctor wanted to visit just one more vendor to pick up a special kind of lubricant for the delicate parts under the TARDIS's console. While he paid for his purchase, the shopkeeper's assistant asked Hermione if she had ever seen the Vandelvorm migration. When Hermione replied that she had not, the man excitedly explained that once every ten years or so the giant native slug-like worms migrated over the entire continent from one ocean to the other to breed – only for the next generation to repeat the process, but in the opposite direction, five years later. They took the same exact path for every migration, which was good, because they left a trail of slime so thick, wide, and deep that none of the land in the path could be used for several years afterwards. The Vandelvorms were also so large and strong that they destroyed anything in their way. That was why the Barcelonians just left the migration path as empty fields most of the time. Hermione listened interestedly and even the Doctor admitted that he had never heard of the occurrence before. However, alarm bells went off in Hermione's head when the vendor said the migration always happened in the fields on the north side of the town…and that was why they had built the space port on the south side.
"Doctor," she whispered hoarsely. "That's where we left the TARDIS."
He immediately understood her concern and turned to the vendor, "When is the next migration due to occur?" he asked tightly. The vendor explained the migration was supposed to pass through their local area at any time in the next day or so.
There was no response to the man's explanation except for the Doctor to grab Hermione's hand. "Run!" he told her with urgency.
…
By the time that they got closer to the area where they had parked the TARDIS, Hermione was completely spent. Her recent injuries and malnutrition had taken their toll on her body and it became obvious that it was going to take some time before she got back into tip-top shape again.
The Doctor noticed her physical distress. "Take a moment and rest," he commanded, but in a voice filled with concern as he admonished himself for his thoughtlessness as to her condition. He should have realized that she was not quite well enough for such intense activity. However, while she stood there with her hands on her knees until her breathing became less labored, they both eyed the sight in front of them with uneasiness. "There is obviously no hurry, now" he added gloomily. "We won't be goin' anywhere until we figure this mess out, anyway."
Just as they feared, the migration had already reached them. In fact, the path of the giant caravan-sized Vandelvorms stretched as far as the eye could see and completely separated them from the TARDIS. The ship was safe for the moment, right outside of the slime path. However, the giant slug worms were moving much faster than anything that big and bulky had the right to and it would only take one to slightly veer off of the path and wipe the TARDIS out. Unfortunately, though, the Doctor and Hermione would have to both dodge the giant Vandelvorms and also cross the river of slime to get over to her.
"Ugh," groaned Hermione with disgust after she recovered enough to talk without gasping. "They are like giant flobberworms!" When the Doctor looked at her questioningly, she clarified. "They're big worms known for the magical properties of their mucus. It's a common ingredient in a lot of potions. However, harvesting it is no fun – just like crossing that isn't going to be much fun, either." She looked at the huge slime path gloomily.
Then, almost absentmindedly, while she was deep in thought about their predicament, she pulled out her wand and twirled it through her fingers. As she took a few more deep gulps of air to further stabilize her breathing, she realized another thing that she was in need of in her temporarily weakened state.
"Aguamenti," she said clearly with a slight swish and flick of her wand. When the fountain of clear cool water spouted from its tip, she took a long drink and then invited the Doctor to do so, as well. He looked at her in proud amazement before he took her up on the offer - even though his Time Lord constitution did not require as much hydration as her human form did. However, he could still see the benefits of having easy access to such an important resource. Therefore, the surprise skill was just another reason why it was certainly convenient to have a witch around sometimes! When her told her as much, she just smiled gratefully at him. The attractive sight made him feel better…despite the dangerous problem they currently faced.
The moment of rest and the water helped Hermione to regain her equilibrium and she finally felt able to tackle the problem head on. She turned to speak to the Doctor who had been trying in vain to discover a solution to their situation while she recovered. "I'm going to try to get a bit closer," she said. The witch did not bother to wait for an answer before she transfigured a stick into a small cup, darted over to the migration path, watched the flow of slug traffic for a moment, and then scooped up a small bit of slime before she came back to stand next to the Doctor. The man nodded approvingly at the action before he pulled out his ever present sonic screwdriver and pointed it at the cup. When he was satisfied with the subsequent readings, he dipped a finger into the contents and sniffed the contents reflectively before he turned back to Hermione.
"I don't believe that it is poisonous or dangerous for either of us," he announced contemplatively. Hermione followed his lead, and touched the slime herself. She noticed that it was very thin in consistency…instead of being a thick goo like she had expected.
"I think we can wade through this," she suggested before she sighed at the thought of getting all of that slime out of her hair afterwards. "Also, I watched the Vandelvorms and, even though they are fast, there are gaps between them. If we are very careful, we should be able to zigzag our way across the path – in between the creatures – just like a giant life-size game of Frogger!" At the Doctor's puzzled look, she added, "It's an old video game where a frog has to cross a road while dodging heavy traffic."
The Doctor nodded his understanding and realized that she had purposely not told him what happened to the frog if it didn't make it across the road. "It's the best plan that we've got," he said pragmatically before his cheerfully manic grin put in an appearance again. "Let's do it!"
Hermione nodded in agreement, but took a moment to affix her wand to her hand with a sticking charm first. "I don't want to lose it in the muck, but I don't want to put it away because we might need it," she explained to the Doctor after he shot her an inquiring look.
This time he was the one who nodded as he grabbed her free hand with his. "Ready?" he asked, but a look of concern for her was present in his eyes. He paused to reconsider their strategy for a moment before he tried to amend it. "Why don't you stay here?" he asked. "Or better yet, go back to the market. I will get across to the TARDIS and then we will come back for you."
Hermione was already shaking her head in disagreement before he had even finished his sentence. "No way! We are in this together!" She smiled wanly up at him again. "We'll be fine," she then added with more bravado than she actually felt.
The Doctor squeezed the hand that he still head in encouragement as they continued to walk up to the slime path. There, after one more reassuring look at each other, they jumped into the first gap that they saw between the slug worms. Hermione gasped as she immediately sunk into the slime up to her knees.
"I didn't realize it would be so deep!" she cried out as she struggled to move. The Doctor was a bit better off than she was since he was taller and the slime only came halfway up his calves. Therefore, after a little adjustment, he found that he was able to weave through the oncoming slime creatures and tow her easily along behind him -especially after she had the idea to place a weight-lightening charm on herself. This arrangement worked very well until they were about halfway across the giant slime path and the Doctor stepped into a deep slime pocket that caused him to fall – and take Hermione with him. She managed to get upright just as a giant Vandelvorm rapidly approached.
"Locomotor!" she screamed in desperation as she pointed her wand at the Doctor. He was then shocked to suddenly find himself hovering about six inches over the slime while Hermione actually directed his movements with her wand. She was still being "towed" behind him but the Doctor could tell that having to maintain the different spells was taking a toll on her. He knew they needed to finish getting across the path quickly before her energy was completely depleted. Therefore, he started calling out the directions to her. That way, she could focus on her wand work and not the Vandelvorms.
"Right!...Left!...Left!...Right!" he shouted down to her. She trusted that he was steering them correctly and moved her wand accordingly to his directions. After a while, it even started to feel like a giant video game and she grinned with every successful dodge and weave.
Finally, they reached the TARDIS. With a muttered "Finite Incantatem" to end the spells that had saved their lives, both Hermione and the Doctor tumbled through her blue doors to safety.
In the end, he just sighed. "I'm sorry, Hermione. I just wanted for you to have a good time on your first trip."
"Are you kidding, Doctor? That was the most fun that I have had in ages!" she exclaimed, grinning cheerfully since she was no longer covered in goo. "I'm going to go take a shower now, though, since I usually prefer my fun to be a little less messy! I want to try out some of that new tea - in the library - when I am finished, though." She paused just long enough to throw a cheeky little kiss over her shoulder at him before she headed off down the corridor to her room.
His eyes followed her with pride. He should have known that a little bit of slime could not keep a woman like Hermione down for long. He then checked the controls to make sure that they were safely floating in the Vortex before he headed off to take a shower himself. He tried very hard not to think about the fact that Hermione was wet and naked right on the other side of the wall – and he was unaware that she was thinking the exact same thing about him.