Caulifla and Kale What IF

by PurpleDiamond2020

This is a collection of what if stories, following two saiyan females from Universe Six. Most of them are AUs or just parodies of what I have thought about. Similar to "Legendary Super Giantess", it's non-canon to my first two stories: "Misadventures of Caulifla and Kale" & "Cabba's Outrageous Missions" This is just for fun and creativity!

10. Hit the Father Figure?

Author's Notes- I don't own Dragon Ball Super. The show and manga are created by Toei Animation and Akira t. Here's Chapter ten of the story. Hope that you enjoy this and send me a PM or a review down below to see if you have any other ideas for me to write! Thank you!

Caulifla and Kale: What IF: Chapter Ten- "Hit the...Father Figure?"

Unknown Planet, Hit's Hut (Year 767-Thirteen Years from Now)

Hit. He's the legendary hitman of the sixth universe. He kills people who are on his hit list. He's quicker than the speed of light, never letting anyone see his actions. His only goal is nothing in particular. He just wants to be alone. That is, until a female assassin, by the name of Apricot, appeared in his life. Despite him being several years older than her, Hit grows attached to Apricot and her kind personality. They're now in their hut in the middle of an unknown planet. They seem to be hanging out, after Hit finishes his last target for today. He and Apricot are looking at each other's eyes like they're dancing slightly from the light above their heads. "Hit? Have you ever wondered of having children?" said Apricot, as she takes a bite off of the spaghetti and meatballs that she made for dinner. "I don't know. I'm the parental figure to be taking care of children. I am an assassin, so they don't give a damn about life in general." said Hit, as he closes his eyes, while eating his dinner. Apricot makes a frown, after Hit's response. She would really want to have children one day. She later hears a knock on the door, causing her to get up of her chair to get to the door. She reaches the door, opens it, and sees a pair of baskets below her feet. She wonders why they're here, while looking around the area for the person who dropped them. She hears some giggling, looking down at the baskets. She bends over, removes the one with the pink blanket covering it, revealing a baby with wild, black, spiky hair. She thinks that this baby is a saiyan from how it's hair looks like. She later removes the one with the green blanket, revealing another baby with black, normal hair. She looks at the tags of both baskets that have names for each of the babies. "Kale...Caulifla...Take good care of my baby girls for me. they're very special for Sadala." said Apricot, as she reads the tags. She looks down at the babies again, but with a smile, thinking that her wish of becoming a mother has really come true. She grabs both baskets, puts them on the couch, while closing the door behind her, and walks back to the kitchen to tell Hit the good news.

Apricot: (Looks at Hit) Hit? I just discovered something.

Hit: You found something at the front of the doorstep? (Looks at Apricot)

Apricot: Of course I did! Come! I have to show you something. (Grabs Hit's hand and drags him out of the kitchen to the living room) Ta-da!

Hit: (Sees the two babies in their baskets) Babies? Who dropped them here?

Apricot: (rubs her chin) I don't know, but they must be desperate to give their babies to a safer area. (Smiles at Hit) And I was thinking of probably-

Hit: (Looks at Apricot with a frown) No. We will not be taking them. I said this before, I'm a assassin who kills. I take life away, not look over it.

Apricot: Come on! Maybe it would be best that you quit as an assassin and start being someone else. Like a father? (Leans close to Hit)

Hit: (Sighs) (If I quit being an assassin, what will be my new purpose in life? Apricot is all that I need, but children!? They're not even my children! But...I don't want her to be sad at me. If that means that I have to be the one thing that I am not ready for, then so be it.) Okay. I'll quit as an assassin and be a father. (Looks away with blushed cheeks)

Apricot: (Hugs Hit) Oh! Thank you! Thank you! Thank you! You won't regret it! Now...for their names,...(Looks at the baby with the pink blanket) That one with the pink blanket is named Caulifla and...(Looks at the baby with the green blanket, probably hiding behind it) That one is named Kale.

Hit: That sound more like saiyan names. Are they from Sadala?

Apricot: Yes. The tags that they had on their baskets say that they're from Sadala. Are you thinking of going there?

Hit: They must live there, meaning that we must be citizens on there. (Looks at Apricot) Is that okay with you?

Apricot: Of course, it does! Hit!? We're going to Sadala and becoming a family!

Hit: (Makes a blank expression) ...

The two former assassins leave their hut with Caulifla and Kale. They head out to Planet Sadala, the home planet of the two saiyan babies. Hit is having some second thoughts about becoming a father to two children how aren't his to begin with. He later looks at Apricot, having fun with Caulifla, the one in the pink blanket. He later looks down at his lap to be Kale, who's wrapped in the green blanket. He thinks that being a father is going to be hard, but he'll try his best to be the best one for these children. He looks ahead of the ship, seeing the planet. "Apricot? We're here." said Hit, as he sets the ship to land on Planet Sadala. This is the beginning of something new for the legendary assassin. Or should I say...Legendary foster father? Hahahah! I like word play! Let's skip thirteen years later into the full story of how Hit and Apricot are doing in raising two saiyan females on their own.

Planet Sadala, Hit's and Apricot's House (Thirteen Years Later-Present Day)

It's the present day on Sadala and the people are more happier than ever. On the far right of the west city area, Hit's and Apricot's house is shining in that silver and white color around it. Inside of the house, Hit is folding his clothes, before he leaves for his job: Being a SDF elite. He became the first non-saiyan person to be a SDF Elite soldier with his extraordinary powers of Time Skip. Hit puts on his dark purple outfit, while grabbing his armor. Even though he doesn't like the job a lot, he still does it for his "family". Apricot leaves her room with a golden yellow dress on, while walking towards Hit. She rubs his shoulders to comfort him. "Remember, Hit? Don't kill. You're passed that." said Apricot, as she kisses Hit on the cheeks. "I know, Apricot. You tell me this every morning, before I go to work." said Hit. As he finishes putting away the clothes, Caulifla comes out of her room to see her parents. She's wearing a pink tank top, baggy purple pants, and black shoes. She walks towards Apricot and Hit with a smile on her face. "Dad? Can me and Kale leave the house, while you're gone?" said Caulifla. "No. I know what you're trying to do. You're not going to that building and sneaking onto the ship, Caulifla. I told you a million times not to do that. Besides, you and Kale will be staying here with Apricot. She has something special for you two. "said Hit. Caulifla later on makes an angry expression, after Hit's answer to her question. Kale, who's wearing a red t-shirt, red mini skirt with some black shorts underneath, and golden boots, walks into the room in a shy like way. She nervously looks at Apricot and Hit, before saying that she's scared of what will Apricot will have for them. Apricot looks at Kale, bends over, and smiles at her shy child. "It's fine, Kale. I'll have a few visitors and we'll have a whole lot of fun. Okay?" said Apricot, as she pats Kale's back. Meanwhile, Hit says bye, before using his time skip to teleport himself out of the house. "He doesn't have anything else to say. Does he? "said Caulifla, as she looks at the spot, where Hit was orginally at. Apricot tells the girls that the visitors will be coming here in a few minutes that she wants them to be ready. She leaves the living room, enters the kitchen, and makes some snacks for the visitors. Caulifla and Kale sit on the couch, watching TV, while waiting for the visitors to come.

Twenty-Six Minutes Later...

Kale: (Looks at a large, round saiyan in yellow) Uh...H-Hi. My name is K-Kale. You?

?: (Looks at Kale with blushed cheeks) My name is Limo. It's great to talk to you two, after my mom said that we were going to your house for a meeting. (Looks at Caulifla) What do you want to do today? (Nervously smiles)

Caulifla: (Frowns at Limo and grunts) I want to go to a distant planet and train there! Dad always goes on these missions for those bastards at headquarters and I have to stay here and train on my own. (Looks at Kale) Don't take it bad, Kale. Training with you is a good hobby for hours.

Kale: (Looks at Caulifla with a concerning expression) Caulifla? Why do you want to go to a different planet to train?

Caulifla: Because...it's better to train at a different place, rather than on the same planet like this! Maybe we could get stronger, if we train on one of those waste-land like planets with no creatures that can attack us. Does that seem to interest you? (Smiles at Kale)

Kale: I think that training here is the safest place for us, Caulifla. I don't want Mom or Dad to be mad at us. You do know what happened the last time Dad got mad at us? (Shakes in fear) H-He gave us the worst punishment of seeing various animals die from blood thirsty predators! (Closes her eyes) AHHH! I didn't like it at all.

Caulifla: Hmph! That was your punishment. Mine was a bit worse, with all of the...butt slapping...and...and...(Looks away with a scared expression on her face) The bleeding out of my ass! How hard did he hit me!?

Limo: (Raises his eyebrow) Wow. Your father is a bit rough around the edges. I've heard that he's a former assassin around here. Is that true?

Caulifla: (Looks at Limo) Of course that's right. Hit was an assassin, who killed people without a second thought! When I get strong enough, I'm going to be an assassin! (Points at her chest in a confident way) Hell yeah!

Kale: Well...I don't want to hurt anyone. I believe that peace and love is the best way to live in the future. (Smiles) Don't you agree?

Limo: (Blushes, while looking at Kale) I-I believe that!

Caulifla: I don't! Kale! You need to start being more rough and more aggressive, if you want that future to happen. Speaking of the future,...(Looks at Limo) Your friend is a part of the SDF elite program, right?

Limo: (Looks at Caulifla) Yes. Cabba and I are in the training program. I've heard that he's about to go to a planet to train. Why?

Kale: (Looks at Caulifla with a scared expression) No, Caulifla! We're not doing that!

Caulifla: Come on, Kale! Just a short trip and we'll be back before you know it. Trust me?

Kale: Hm...(Looks away) I don't-

Caulifla: After we come back, we can get some ice cream cones!

Kale: (Looks at Caulifla) O-Okay. We'll go, but make sure that we're safe and that Dad doesn't know. Okay?

Caulifla: (Places her hand on her chest and raises the other) I promise as a sister that nothing will go wrong on this short trip. (Winks at Kale)

Kale: Caulifla! (Makes an angry expression)

Caulifla: Okay! I'm just kidding. (Looks at Limo) Well, lard ass! Take us to the headquarters.

After their short talk, Limo, Caulifla, and Kale leave the house and fly off to the headquarters. Caulifla is so happy to go off on another planet to train better, Kale is so nervous of what will happen to them during the trip, but she believes that Caulifla will keep her safe, and Limo is super nervous of what his friend will say to him, once he brings the girls along. They reached the headquarters, home of the SDF elites on Sadala. They enter into the building through the back area, landing in the back training area. Limo sees a few elite juniors training here, but catches his eyes on one saiyan with a blue outfit. His hair is spiky and black, like Caulifla's, but he has a single bang hanging over his head, like Kale's. He lands on the floor, sees Limo and the girls, and starts jogging his way to them. "Hi, Limo! How are you- (Looks at Caulifla and Kale) Why are they doing here?" said Cabba, Limo's friend, as he questions of why Caulifla and Kale are here. "Cabba? Caulifla and Kale need to go with you to train. Is that okay if they come with you? "said Limo, as he looks away with a nervous look on his face. Cabba is going to leave and train on another planet near here, but bringing visitors along would mean that he be breaking the rules. "The captain says that no vistors are allowed on junior training trips. I'm sorry, but you two would have to go back to where you came fro-" said Cabba, before Caulifla grabs him by the collar of his outfit. She warns him of his words, before she does something violent to him. Cabba nervously sweats from Caulifla's warning. He says that he changes his mind and will bring the two to his trip. Caulifla smiles, lets go of Cabba, and looks at Kale with the same smile. "We're going to train on a different planet!" said Caulifla. Kale just smiles nervously, feeling that something bad is going to happen to them. After that, the four leave the training area, Cabba discuss of a plan to keep this a secret, and he, Caulifla, and Kale leave the area to the ships area.

Hit's and Apricot's House (Two Hours Later)

Hit: (uses time skip to appear in the living room) I'm here! (Looks around) Kale? Caulifla?

Apricot: (walks into the living room, looking at Hit) Hit? You're back so early. What happened?

Hit: (Looks at Apricot) The mission went quicker than usual. All we had to do is escort the citizens out of the area, while we take care of the threat.

Apricot: I think that it was a good decision on your part. (Rubs Hit's shoulders) Being a SDF elite soldier has really changed your violent behavior.

Hit: Where's Caulifla and Kale? Did they talk to the visitors earlier ago?

Apricot: Oh...(Looks away) About that...They...left with Limo and-

Hit: (Leans closer at Apricot with squinted eyes) And what? Where. Are. They?

Apricot: (gulps) Before you get mad, they left to the headquarters and-

(A few seconds later)

Hit: WWWWHHHHHHAAAAATTTTT!? They're on another planet, training!? (Makes an angry expression)

Apricot: I heard them, while me and Limo's mother were talking in the room. I didn't stop them, because I know that Caulifla wanted to go to a different place to train and Kale...Well she didn't wanted to go, but I couldn't say no to them. Please, Hit? Don't go to your violent traits again. You do remember what happened the last time it happened? Caulifla's butt was bleeding from your extreme slaps and Kale is completely scared from those Discovery Channel videos of predators attacking their prey in violent ways.

Hit: They needed a reminder of not pissing me off all of the time! I'm going to pick them up! You pick the punishment for them.

Apricot: And don't hurt Limo or any of his friends!

Hit: I won't! Not! (Uses his time skip to teleport out of the living room)

Apricot: (Sighs) I hope that he doesn't kill anyone here. We been here for thirteen years and everything is starting to feel more of a family trip.

Outside of SDF Headquarters...

Kale: (Licking her ice cream, while walking out of the headquarters with Caulifla) That trip was good, Caulifla. Your punches and kicks have really improved a lot. (Looks at Caulifla with a smile)

Caulifla: (Looks at Kale with a smile) Yeah! I'm getting real close to making it to the next level.

Kale: (Looks away) I just have a feeling that Dad is going to punish us for leaving the planet. Is he?

Caulifla: Don't worry, Kale. Dad will never know that we were gone. Promise me?

Hit: (Teleports behind Kale and Caulifla) Oh really? (Looks at them with red, glowing eyes/Hits them on the back of their heads)

Hit takes the unconscious Kale and Caulifla back to the house for their proper punishments. He really doesn't want to deal with this, after his work was done, but it's his duty as a father to do this. He reaches to the house, opens the door, throws them onto the couch, and yells at them to wake up. Kale is the first one to wake up from the blow to the back of her head, seeing her father angry at her. "Ah...I-Is this a dream!?" said Kale, before Hit glows his eyes red again, signaling that he's angrier than ever. Caulifla wakes up, after Kale, confused is to what happened. She later looks at her father's angry expression, for which made her expression into looks of terror. "What did I told you about leaving the (BLEEP)-ING PLANET!? It's dangerous out there and I don't want you two to get hurt! I had to quit my job as an assassin to take care of you! I can't take this anymore! For your punishment...You two will be training with me! I won't go easy on you either, so prepare yourself for the worst punishment of your life! GO TO YOUR BEDS! NOW!" said Hit, as he angrily points his hand to their rooms. Caulifla and Kale run out of the living room, into their rooms and shut their doors in a terrifying way. Hit takes a few deep breathes, after what he had to go through. He didn't want to do that, but it's at least better than what he gave them last time. He goes into his room, while Apricot, who was in the kitchen during that argument, makes a sad expression. She should have taught of a better way of telling Hit the truth. She just hopes that the children don't get too "traumatized" from Hit's latest punishment. She leaves the kitchen and back to her room for the night.

Outside of Hit's and Apricot's House (Four Weeks Later)

Four weeks or one month have passed and Hit's training with Caulifla and Kale are...going "great." His training is working well on them. Caulifla is feeling the pain around her body, while Kale is...crying over the pain that she got from Hit. Hit finally says that training is over. "Kale...You need work on releasing your power more. Caulifla...you need to stop thinking that you can take me on. It's all about changing for the better. Now I want you to keep training on your skills. I don't want to see any of your taking a break after this! GOT IT!?" said Hit. Kale shakes in fear, before running to a near by tree and begins punching it. Caulifla does the same thing, too, before Hit teleports out of the area and into the kitchen. He grabs a cup of icy water, drinks it, and sighs in relief. He thinks that his "punishment" is working. "That will teach them not to make me mad all of the time." said Hit, as he smiles. Before he can take another sip of icy water, he hears a "AHEM!" on his right. he turns around, seeing Apricot, crossing her arms and making a upsetting expression.

Apricot: (Walks up to Hit) Hit? Are you taking your training punishment a bit too far? Kale is scared that she might get hurt by you all the time, while Caulifla doesn't want to go training outside of the house. I mean...besides the area near the house, but you know what I mean! Hit? It's time that you stop your punishment. they have learned their lesson.

Hit: No. Not until they are strong enough to take care of their own. Now...I'm going back to the area, see if they're still training on their own. You did say not to use any violent behaviors towards them and I did. Problem solved. (Leaves the kitchen)

Apricot: No! That's not what I meant! I meant to say is that you should have grounded them for leaving the planet. Like not allowing them to talk to their friends or no seconds plates during dinner time? That's non-violent punishment!

Hit: (Looks at Apricot) Training is not a violent punishment, so...I guess I take that point. Now I have to leave.

Apricot: Okay, but I have a feeling that something is going to happen. Don't go too far with them. Okay?

Hit: I won't. Not! (Teleports out of the house)

Apricot: (Makes a disappointed expression) I've heard that!

Two Hours Later...

(Caulifla and Kale breathing hard, while Hit stands in front of them)

Hit: (Crosses his arms) There! You're starting to improve a little. (Looks at Kale) Kale? Your power has increased over the past two hours. But...

Kale: (Looks at her father tiredly) What, D-Dad?

Hit: (Points at Kale) You still need to release it more. I have a feeling that there's still a huge amount of power inside of you. (Looks at Caulifla) And Caulifla?

Caulifla: (Quickly smiles at her father nervously) Y-Yes, D-D-Dad?

Hit: You did a good job at not being prideful of your actions. (Gives her a thumbs up) You're free to go! Your punishment is done.

Caulifla: Oh! Thank you! Thank you! Thank you! Thank you! (Runs back to the house)

Hit: (Looks at Kale) You, on the other hand...we're going to continue our training. I'm going to work you so hard, that you have to increase your true potential.

Kale: (Eyes widen) WHY!? Caulifla was the one who started the whole "Leave the planet for training purposes" in the first place!

Hit: Yes, but she completed her objectives fully. You didn't You're getting there, but it's not enough to make it happen. (Moves closer to Kale with a threatening expression) You have to be more forceful with your power, so that the world becomes a better place! (Looks at a near by bunny) I'm going to help you get there. Do you see this bunny over there? (Points to the bunny)

Kale: (Sees the bunny) Y-Yes. They're one of my favorite animals. Why would you say-

Hit: (uses his time skip to kill the bunny instantaneously) There! The bunny is dead and you didn't do (Bleep) to protect it!

Kale: (Makes a even more terrified expression) ...

Hit: (Walks away from Kale) Now...Let's begin the training. We'll have two more hours of this, so better get prepar- (Senses something big, turns around. seeing Kale glowing green)

Kale: (Makes a angry expression with veins budging out, teeth grinding, and face turning red) YOU BASTARD! I'LL SHOW YOU REAL POWER AND HOW NOT TO SET ME THE (BLEEP) OFF! (Charges at Hit with a glowing fist)

A Few Minutes Later...

While Caulifla is sitting on the couch, watching TV, Apricot is thinking of what Kale is doing with Hit. She knows that Hit cant be rough around her, but she fears that he might have taken the punishment a bit too far. She later hears the wall of the living room crashing, causing her to stop cleaning the dishes. She runs out of the kitchen, seeing a huge hole in the right side of the house. She later sees Hit with multiple bruises on his body. Who could have done this to him!? She finally got her answer, as Kale walks into the house with a green aura around her body and pupil-less eyes (She's not in her super saiyan or her berserker form). She marches her way to Hit's body, making a sinister smile. "This is what happens when you PISS me the (BLEEP) out! TAKE ALL OF THE BULL-(BLEEP) THAT I HAVE TO PUT UP WITH YOUR TRAINING AND YOUR PUNISHMENTS! I HATE YOU! I HATE MY LIFE! I. HATE. EVERYTHING!" said Kale, as she repeatedly punches Hit in the face multiple times. His face begins to draw blood from his nose, eyes, and mouth from the various punches. Caulifla just stares on at the event, dumbfounded of Kale's true potential power. Apricot, on the other hand, runs towards the two, separates them, and looks into Kale's pupil-less eyes. "Kale! Don't be that way! I know that your father is only trying to give you a lesson, but he's new to the whole fatherhood thing. You just have to calm down! Hit and I are your parents. This isn't you to punch people in the face and wanting them to be killed. You...don't want to end up like your father. Don't you?" said Apricot. Kale seems to be calming down, after Apricot's speech. She doesn't want to hurt anyone, including her family. She looks at Caulifla, who's still watching the incident, then later at Hit's bleeding face, and then to Apricot in her sad expression. She cries out tears, before powering down and falling unconscious. Apricot manages to grab Kale in time, tell Caulifla to carry her sister into the room and later on carries Hit's body to the bedroom. She's glad that Kale has power to protect herself, but looking at Hit's damaged face, she...feels sorry for not stopping her daughters from doing something bad.

Hit's and Apricot's Bedroom (Twenty-Five Minutes Later)

Apricot: (Sees Hit moves his head consciously) Hit?

Hit: (Wakes up, sees Apricot, and feels his head in pain) Ugh! What happened. Last time I saw Kale glowing green, her saying that she was going to show me her true power, she punches me in the face and...and...I blacked out. I still felt other pains around my body, but that's it.

Apricot: Well...Kale got angry, punched you in various ways, while saying that she hates everything. I stopped her and she's finally calmed down. (Touches Hit's shoulder) You really need to talk to her about what you've done to her. Same goes for Caulifla.

Hit: You're...r-right. I should have grounded them. I guess the next time I ground them, I better not make Kale angry again.

Apricot: (Smiles) Good! Good decision on your part. Now, I'm going to say the message to them. You need some time to relax from those beatings to the face.

Hit: No. I'll do it. It's the best thing that I could do as a father. (Smiles at Apricot) Thanks.

Apricot: Okay. (Watches Hit leave the room slowly) (I guess that Kale lashing out on her father made Hit into a better father. Huh! I think that that punishment really helped for all three of them. But still...Hit should be more nicer to his daughters. I'll remember to put Kale into anger management over the summer break.) (Leaves the room with a smile on her face)

To Be Continued...?

Notes- The next chapter might be a follow up to this one, but hang on there. If you have any more ideas about what I should make for this series, then PM me or send in a review below. I also have a poll in my profile for upcoming stories this year. Thank for reading the long ass chapter!