Barranca: That's really the big question, isn't it. I just love suspense.
Shirosenshi: Thank you! And Roy really is a goofball... don't worry, we'll see some badass Roy too.
moonstone: Cheese wheels are awesome! I'd steal one too. And yes, Ed's being morbid... setting the chapter up for angst... shame on him.
Animeluver4ever: Thank you very much!
MandaxPanda: Yeah, poor Roy is between a rock and a hard place being a middle man of a sort. But he tries for Edward.
deathwolfkitten: Even if you have said it before, thank you!
B.D.: Roy is a thief! Stealing of pictures is punishable by hanging of the person by their toes while five year olds beat them with sticks to try and make candy come out.
Emotionally Unstable Fangirl: If you scream at the sight of bugs you would have loved to be here with me this morning. Five inch long scorpion flattened to the hardwood flooring. And sure! The kitty is yours. I doubt she was the one to kill the scorpion anyway... even if she was the one who pointed it out to me.
Neenabluegirl: Actually I didn't want to leave it there, but I think the chapter was at 17 pages at that point, and I didn't want to make it too large in comparison with the others. So I found a good cliffhanger XD. And thank you, keep trying to figure it out though, I love the ideas people keep coming up with.
chernevog: Well, even if this is the only one, at least I am grateful to know you are reading and enjoying. That means a lot. You might wish to have tissues on hand for this chapter as well, just in case.
Skrita: Thank you. And so far yes, it is looking up. After much hassle on my end. But I realize it's only one small part of my life, even if it is college and their abysmal registration department.
his paper wings: Missing an update is both good and bad XD. I'm glad you didn't miss the last one though. I hope this one doesn't disappoint.
Pyrozia: I'm afraid you shall have to be in lots of suspense! Buahaha... and you wouldn't be the first person to have a love/hate relationship with me and my stories. You're in good company.
vampirelf: Ed did get some very awesome dialogue in that chapter. Oh if only Al could have heard and known... poor Roy would have never gotten to see a picture of Ed.
elemental heiress: Yeah, some of the chapters do bring up things that really make you think. The whole life and death thing being one of them. Then next on my mind would be the whole love matter that will be soon appearing in more form. The idea of what love is, means, needs, etc. Lots of lovely things to think about. I'm glad that people, like you, are thinking a lot while reading the story. It makes me feel like I'm doing it right.
swdrone: Yes, it is, and thank you.
Alyzabeth: I do have a few ideas on where to move Al, but I've not for myself finalized it yet. It won't be a needed bit of info until later on, so I've plenty of time to draw out of a hat. And Ed would be suited to stealing cheese wheels... I've no idea why... but the imagery fits him.
Soaha: That would be nice, yes. I've never considered adding voodoo to a story... intriguing.
GreedxEd: Roy has got a lot of willpower because he's got big muscles! XD
black-klepon: Sticky congealed seven-year old blood? ...morbid.
Cheru-chan: Evil? Me? ...okay, you may have a point XD. And I will happily let Ed do things by/with Roy anytime he wishes... so I hope that is frequently. He does need to do things for himself, especially considering the fun bit of man he gets to do them with. ...my mind is hopeless... and cake! Yes! Though not quite... I shall explain downwards.
itachigurlsaiyaku: Thank you! And that would be a fun conversation for sure.
Eli: Roy is hopeless to resist Ed in any form, whether he realizes it or not. He's got a weakness for sure. He's practically spouting poetry. Although Ed is being a bit clueless to for good reason.
ElricSisters7: Well, not too much longer to wait for that. But they really are adorable together. They just can't imagine being without each other as it is.
j.d.y.: Probably because you have read enough of my stuff to know it won't turn out with cakes and roses in the workroom XD.
Regina Evans: Oh I've still got quite a ways to go, at least twenty more chapters, never fear. Just in case, grab more tissues, and thank you! I'm glad you enjoy it so much. And that's the first time someone has said my vocabulary is interesting, I feel so happy now.
Okay, a few things I realized I forgot last chapter to mention, and it was brought to my attention... I love rhymes... no that's not it. But I remember now!
The cake! The cake is almost ready to be put up on my LJ. I just have to scan in the diagrams and we're all good. I need to therefore fish my scanner out from under my bed and hook it all up. So it won't be too much longer now.
As to my LJ stories, I had updated November back two weeks or so ago, so those of you reading that can go check and see if you're fully caught up. Basically it's the chapter you need your Google translate for nearer the end.
And I think that covers it... anyone want a dead scorpion? I caught another.
Anyway, I hope you enjoy the chapter! ...and you may need tissues. This is your Potential Tissue Warning.
Chapter Twenty-Five
Roy took a deep breath, his mind whirling with thousands of thoughts, emotions, none of which he could voice as he tried to understand Edward's request. Much less attempt to succeed in getting it granted! But that was the first hurdle, he could worry about Edward's reasons later. He'd been silent too long already, and Alphonse was noticing. "Actually, I have a request... but it's difficult to explain." Try really difficult.
If the slightly pained look on Roy's face was anything to go by, Alphonse could believe it. Mere curiosity alone was sufficient enough for him to want to know just what it could possibly be that Roy would actually feel uncomfortable asking about it. "Go ahead."
Roy knew it was a damn good time to think up a damn good lie. He'd at least try, for Edward. If this was what Edward wanted… "before I lost touch with your father, I had lent him a few books of mine. Alchemy texts. I was wondering if I might check through his workroom and see if they're there. I understand it's an uncomfortable subject, and I understand if you'd rather not allow it."
Alphonse quickly held up a hand to forestall any further attempts at explaining, giving Roy a small smile. It wasn't that he didn't want to hear an explanation, it was more that he just didn't want to even think about that place if he could help it. As it was, Roy seemed to have some kind of strange connection to the long-gone parts of his family that he couldn't fathom, as evidenced by the possession of those letters. He didn't see how this would be much different… and it wasn't like he cared if Roy were lying and robbed the workroom of all its contents. He didn't want them. "You don't have to explain. Just don't expect me to stay in there with you."
"I promise that's the last intrusive thing I'll ask of you." Roy breathed silently in relief. Although his nervousness about actually letting Edward go through with this raised its head again.
Alphonse let go of a small laugh, turning his steps towards the hallway. "You've not asked that many. Besides, they're your books. You've not struck me as insincere or some kind of stalking murderer yet, so I'll allow it."
Roy was shown through the house to the workroom where Alphonse left him at the door looking unsettled, informing him that he'd be either in the kitchen or living room when he was done. Roy waited until Alphonse was halfway gone in a quick retreat before turning to the door.
It was impossible to put a name to the emotions underpinning the uncertainty he felt as he stared at the innocent enough looking door. He didn't know what to expect to find. Only that he was about to see for himself where Edward had died… and that thought alone left him with a tightness in his stomach.
At his side he could detect the faintest ethereal glow come forward, and reaching out he lay his hand on the knob to ease open the door which creaked with years of disuse. Letting out a heavy breath he glanced at Edward once, before stepping across the threshold first.
The lights flickered on, and Roy realized that Edward still recalled where the switch was on the wall. Shutting the door firmly behind them he ignored an active inspection of the room in favor of turning to Edward who was staring fixedly at the room around them.
"You sure you're okay to be doing this?" He asked, his voice rough sounding, slowly walking to the ghost's side.
Edward met his eyes with a lost looking smile and a matching shrug. "No." He whispered miserably. "But I want to." And he looked away with a ragged sigh, his eyes drawn to the exact place on the floor where he could remember as if it were yesterday, that he'd knelt there to perform his last alchemy. He shivered, unable to help it. It was far too much like something out of the nightmares he'd gladly left behind come the time he had met Roy.
Roy followed the ghost's gaze, it wasn't too difficult to determine where or what the spirit was looking at. There, near to them on the floor, was a sickeningly large, uneven portion of the hardwood flooring that had been stained darker than the rest.
Blood.
He knew without a doubt, and a sinking pit in his stomach, that it was the place Edward had died. As Alphonse had said, there'd been nothing left but blood. Edward had been ripped apart.
Edward swallowed hard as he floated over to kneel beside the edge of the stain, his silvery hair falling forward across his face and into tortured eyes as he ran a hand against the bloodstained wood. His shoulders hunching in on him as he expelled a shaky breath before whirling away as if in sudden fright.
"Edward!" Roy breathed out soothingly as the ghost collapsed at his feet, shaking. He was on his knees before he even registered moving, he knew his legs were intersecting Edward's but neither of them seemed to care. "We should go." He insisted, brushing a hand back into silvery hair that didn't even flutter at his touch.
Edward shut his eyes tightly, shaking his head frantically. "No! I'm fine. Just… don't leave me! Please…"
Roy felt something in his chest tighten and melt at the plea, and he settled fully down onto the floor. "I could never leave you." He promised gently, and discarded all possible worries about Alphonse wondering where he was, he just sat there quietly with Edward. Just watching. Just being there as he knew Edward needed, as Edward tried to gather himself again.
He waited until Edward seemed more at ease before broaching a most likely distressing subject. But he knew that as distressing as it was… he needed to ask. And as cruel as it might feel at the time, at this time, he knew that deep down, it was the best time to ask it. "Alphonse told me something today…" He whispered in the stillness of the room. "About the way you died."
Edward took an unsteady breath, turning his head so that he stared with pained eyes at the stain from blood he knew had once been there. "I used to have nightmares about it… and other parts of that night." He replied haltingly, his voice choking on raw emotion. "It was every bit as violent as I'm sure he said it was, and more. I actually felt it happening."
Roy looked over at Edward, feeling that something in his chest constrict again. But it was not just the words… it was the pained way they were said, as if Edward were desperately trying not to cry. It was the look on the ghost's face. "Hey…" he reached a hand out to his companion to try and get Edward's attention away from that stain again, never looking away from him. "We really can go if you need to. Your father never did borrow any of my books."
"No." Edward shook his head, looking to him with an over-bright smile. "I'm fine, really. Just… stay here with me, please. Remember, you promised? Just don't leave me in here alone."
Roy didn't feel any better witnessing the clearly forced smile, but he nodded. "I wouldn't dream of leaving you." He replied with reassuring conviction before he looked away to take in the rest of the workroom. "Do you want to talk about it? Would it help at all?"
Edward was more than ready to say no, but it never came out. "It took my limbs first, one by one. Shredding them away from my body. It felt like… millions of hot knives slicing into me, slowly peeling everything away. It went from there, ripping me apart. The pain was nothing like I'd ever felt before. I started drowning in my own blood long before my lungs were ripped from me, and the sight of it all… all the blood…"
Roy watched helplessly as Edward trembled, looking far too much like he had that day he'd fallen through the air after a bad dream. But he had not been as concerned then as he was now. Nor as helpless feeling by the knowledge that he was helpless to truly comfort his friend.
"I couldn't help but scream." Edward continued in strained quietness, "and scream… and scream… until I was choking on too much blood to scream any longer. And by that time, it was over. I had begged for Alphonse to be left alone, to punish me. I'd made the mistake, not him. I didn't know I'd die for it, for him. But as painful as being ripped apart like that was, I still am honestly glad Alphonse survived, that it worked."
"Edward…" Roy breathed out sadly, reaching a hand over to where the ghost's shoulder was, but not touching. "I'm…"
"Don't you dare say you're sorry!" Edward whispered fiercely, turning silver eyes on him. Silver eyes that seemed to be over-bright in the ghost's own soft ethereal light. "Don't you dare say you should have come sooner! Don't."
Roy shook his head, his sad expression never departing. "I'm glad you're here with me now. Like this." And he looked over at where his hand hovered, flesh over incorporeal, one of the harshest distinctions to ever exist. And then his eyes slid back up to meet silver ones. "You are as real to me as any living thing."
Edward was still for a time before a watery looking smile began to hesitantly slip through. "I'm glad you're here too, Roy."
Roy let his hand fall away as he smiled back, though it tugged inside him to do so. Not in a painful way, but one that made him all too aware that he'd grown quite close to Edward. And the ghost to him. Ducking his head in what he instantly, to his chagrin, realized could have been termed as shy, he looked back to the floor. "Where've you been, anyway?"
He was hoping that a light change of topic, even if his attempt was blatant, would make Edward smile easier.
"Around." Edward replied simply, following Roy's gaze.
Roy hummed noncommittally. "Mind me asking where?"
"Miss me?" Edward asked airily, but didn't wait for a confirmation one way or the other. "I went around the town for a bit. Watched what went on, mindless stuff really. But it was…" he thought for a moment, "nice."
"And no culture shock moments?"
Edward shook his head proudly. "No. I think I'm well on my way to being a further well-adjusted ghostly member of society."
"I'd say that Grand wouldn't share that sentiment, but his opinion doesn't really count for much anyway." Roy observed dryly.
"And never will at all once we're done with him." Edward muttered and glanced at Roy. "And what were you off doing? I saw you leave with Alphonse."
Roy sighed and placed his hands behind him to lean back against them where he sat. "We visited your grave. He offered, I accepted. I wanted to see it."
"My grave?" Edward asked in a voice that revealed nothing.
Roy looked at him now, eyes searching. "Yes. He visits it once a week you know."
Edward smiled softly at the news, and gave the substantial stain on the floor what could only be termed a parting look before floating up off the floor. "Show me."
It was not a request, but it wasn't needed to be one.
Roy nodded and stood as well. Truthfully, he'd expected this. In Edward's place, who was he to think he'd have wanted anything else? He could understand a potential calling a ghost had to its own grave. "We'll just say goodnight to your brother and then we'll go."
Edward floated up off the floor, determinedly ignoring the impulse to turn around and take another last look. Instead he darted forward to slam his hands against the door before Roy could get to it and open it. Hovering there, between Roy and the door, he bowed his head. "I want you to do something for me in here, before we leave."
Roy stopped where he was, pausing only a moment before he nodded unseen. "Anything."
"On the desk you'll find some books and my notes. They're going to be the only things there." Edward answered slowly. "They have the human transmutation recipe… notes… I need you to destroy them. Get them out of here and destroy them."
Roy didn't need a reason why. He quickly turned, making his way around the bloodstain and to the desk. Laying atop it was just as Edward had said… and he wondered not for the first time if Alphonse, or whomever, had only come in here to clean up the blood, and promptly abandoned all thoughts this room existed. Shaking his head, Roy gathered up the paper notes, stacking them quickly before shoving them into one of the books which he quietly shut.
Once he had all four books shut and gathered into his arms, he vowed he'd destroy them as soon as possible, per Edward's wishes. He made his way back to the apparition's side, and edged around him now to open the door. "I got them all. Don't worry."
Edward was subdued and silent as he followed close to Roy down the hallway, his hands fidgeting with themselves as he stared hard at the floor through saddened eyes. His mood only lifting somewhat when they located Alphonse.
"Find them then?" Alphonse rose from the couch with a tired looking smile.
"I did." Roy's hold tightened fractionally around the books. "Thank you."
Alphonse shrugged, "least I could do after you spent most of the day with me. The company was really nice." He insisted as he walked over to the man. "Are you in town long?"
"Until tomorrow afternoon." Roy replied, before getting down to what he knew Edward would never ask him to do. Yet he knew, just as he'd known he should bring Edward here, that he should do this. "Listen, I'm going to give you my address and phone number in Central. If you ever need anything. Anything at all."
Edward's head jerked quickly to look at Roy with wide eyes, a bubbling of happiness growing inside him that Roy would offer. Not so much for Alphonse's sake, as his brother might believe… but for his sake. "Thank you."
Roy might have smiled, but he resisted on the grounds that smiling as he wished to after spouting off those lines could come across as potentially flirting. He definitely did not want Alphonse to misunderstand.
Alphonse was more than a little surprised by the offer, but he conceded with a nod and a smile. "Okay. Thank you. Hell, my letter came to you all those years ago. This would be faster."
So Roy wrote down the promised information, giving it to Alphonse who tucked it beside the phone for safe-keeping. He didn't wait for Alphonse to herd him to the door, as reluctant for Edward's sake as he was to leave. But he knew Edward wanted to see his grave, and he really should leave before he outstayed his welcome.
"It really was nice to meet you." Alphonse said at the open door, offering out his hand. "Thank you for coming, I mean it."
Roy smiled at the younger Elric, taking the offered hand with a firm shake. "Good luck, Alphonse. I hope to hear from you again one day, but if not, know that I really wish you the best and I hope you find peace one day."
Alphonse's fingers tightened around the door that he held open. "Thank you. Goodnight."
Roy stepped outside, heading for the steps as he halfway turned with a pause. "Night." He answered, his eyes shifting the briefest moment to linger on where Edward hovered next to his brother unseen. His heart feeling rather heavy in his chest as he waited for Edward to finish saying unheard goodbyes.
"I love you, Al." Edward whispered, drawing away at last with the knowledge Roy wouldn't be able to linger much longer. The man had done so much already for him. And casting his brother a parting look, he promised himself that tonight wouldn't be the last he saw of Alphonse as he hurried to Roy.
Roy turned fully as Edward reached his side, and led them away from the house, heart heavy for the silvery apparition.
After waving to Alphonse and then making sure via Edward that the teenager had gone back inside the house, Roy then adjusted his steps towards the cemetery. The ghost close at his side.
It was a warm night for the countryside, but at the very least a slight breeze toyed with the otherwise stagnant air. The sky completely clear save the smattering of stars and a yellow new moon. And the cemetery at night was exactly how Roy envisioned one to be.
Eerie.
His only solace was that he truly had no reason to feel the least ill at ease. Not when he already had a ghost with him. But that brought a question to mind.
"There aren't any other ghosts around here, are there?"
Edward didn't even need to glance around, he'd been keeping an absent eye out for such an event since the moment he'd left that office. "None."
Roy's lips pursed, but he said nothing as he led the way among the headstone markers. Only speaking again when they neared Edward's own headstone, and feeling as if it were all too surreal, he raised a hand to motion to it. "Do you want me to stay?"
Edward didn't look away from the headstone he now knew to be his own. "Yes." He replied softly before floating a bit faster as raw emotion built up inside him. Putting pressure on that dam he could never release.
As he reached his headstone, saw his name there on the inscription, Edward let out a dry sob of a gasp before tumbling from the air to his knees as his hands ghosted over the headstone. His head once more hung limply, silver hair slipping past his bowed shoulders as they shook in the tears he could never expel.
Roy felt the sting of tears in his eyes, blinking them away quickly as he felt his heart contract in pain and sorrow for the distraught ghost. Sucking in a harsh breath he quickly walked to Edward's side, falling to his knees beside him. "I wish I knew what to say." He whispered, mostly to himself as he watched Edward come undone.
He'd never seen Edward like he had this night. Never.
He knew that Edward accepted his existence for what it was. He knew the ghost was not mourning for that. But he knew what Edward was mourning for, and that… that was the reason he stayed quietly beside the ghost who cried, yet was unable to.
Tonight he'd found himself wishing more than ever that he could touch Edward. Just one touch of comfort. But he knew it was a wish made in vain. All he could do was what he would always do for his companion, stay by his side even in times of pain.
Especially in times of pain.
Edward's hands had long since fallen away from the headstone to clench into the grass. And slowly, little by little, his anguish at seeing the hard evidence of his death began to subside. Not a single tear had been shed, and perhaps it was fortunate that this once he was unable to cry with tears, for he felt he would have drowned them both.
Them both… Roy had stayed with him the entire time. And that knowledge only served to soothe his suddenly overstressed emotions.
"Thank you." Edward whispered at last in a hollowed voice as he slowly began to work on righting himself. Not even caring to feel self-conscious in front of Roy.
Roy nodded as he carefully watched his companion. "It affected me pretty hard too when I first saw it." He said quietly in the mutual confidence they shared. "Not as hard as you, of course. But seeing it… it's overwhelming somehow."
Edward looked at him as he brushed his hair back behind an ear with a somewhat shaky hand. "I'm glad I didn't stay with you… see this earlier when Alphonse was still around."
A weak chuckle slipped from him as Roy attempted a smile at the ghost. "I think I'd have chosen him thinking I had gone insane, than ignore you when you need me. Even if you just need me to stay with you so you don't feel alone."
"Don't tease me, Roy Mustang." Edward echoed the chuckle as he tried to smile disapprovingly. "I'm very sensitive right now."
"I would." Roy protested good-naturedly, but truthfully all the same and sat back a bit more comfortably. "I can avoid seeing your brother if I wish. But you? You I am happily stuck with. Better to take care of your needs than his."
Edward could only shake his head in what was becoming amused exasperation. He had the sneaking suspicion that Roy was trying to cheer him up… and damn if it wasn't working.
Roy smiled at him before sucking in a deep breath and looking back to the headstone. "You know, when you hear horror stories about cemeteries and ghosts and such appearing to haunt you and pull you under the ground with them, as a kid you never imagine it turning out this way."
"Oh?" An eyebrow inched its way up Edward's forehead. "Should I try scaring you then? We both know that the theory of a ghost pulling someone under the ground is ridiculous, I couldn't touch you if I wanted."
"There's the kicker," Roy's head flopped against his shoulder so he could gaze partially at Edward. "I'm not scared of you. Of ghosts for that matter. Hard to be anymore."
Edward's smile came easier this time. "I never thought I'd be the ghost."
Roy's head flopped back right-side-up. "Yeah… you never imagine it turning out this way."
"I don't think anyone ever really does." Edward replied softly as he looked at his headstone. "I wouldn't have wanted to have died for any lesser a reason, though. I gave everything I had until I had nothing."
Roy smiled faintly, his eyes drifting towards Edward. "You have me now, that's not nothing."
Edward laughed before he could help himself, turning eyes that danced with teasing amusement on Roy. "Not much of a step up, but okay."
Roy rolled his eyes, knowing far too well that he'd left himself open and vulnerable to that one. "Brat ghost." He murmured fondly, and then in a burst of sudden inspiration shifted forward with an "ah!" which caused Edward to give him a funny look… though that may have also been directed towards the straining theatrics he was putting on as he shifted around searching for something on his person.
"Please tell me you forgot to take your medication." Edward eyed him warily.
Roy paused long enough to glare at the ghost before he whipped the champagne bottle out with a victorious cry.
"Do I even want to know where you were hiding that?"
Roy took a long look at the bottle with a cocked head and pursed lips before suddenly shaking his head decisively. "Nope."
Edward snorted and tried not to mind as Roy popped the champagne cork straight through his incorporeal head. The guilty look Roy gave him only serving to make him begin to smile again.
"Good thing you weren't alive right then or I think I would have killed you." Roy remarked lightly and put the bottle to his lips.
"At the very least made me lose an eye." Edward smirked and shook his head as Roy drank deeply from the bottle. "Champagne is for celebrating, and you're drinking a bottle of it while sitting with me on top of my grave?"
Roy drew it away with a hollow popping noise and swallowed before answering. "Yeah, about right."
Edward rolled his eyes, knowing better than to get mad without reason. "Why?"
Roy raised the bottle slightly in a solemn toast to him. "Because," he began gently, "though you may be dead, you're still here in a fashion. And that's got to be something worth celebrating."
Edward thought about it for a moment before he smiled a bit wider. "Yeah… I think you're right."
"Want some?" Roy offered, shaking the bottle with a smirk.
"Oh, shut up, Mustang." Edward growled good-naturedly. "I'm still just a bit distraught here."
Roy gave a suddenly solemn nod and took another hearty drink before daring to try imparting any words of comfort. "Will you go with me when I die, hopefully many, many years from now to visit my grave?"
Or something like comfort.
Edward gave him a bemused look. "You think we'll still be together like this when you die? In seventy years or however long, you think you would still want to be around me every day?"
"Yes." Roy answered without pause, and the grass suddenly became quite fascinating. "To both… I can't understand why we wouldn't be together still. Otherwise what is the point of what we have now?"
Edward looked away, silently admitting that Roy brought up a good point. At least one worth thinking on. "I want to stay with you too." He finally replied to the words Roy had left unsaid, but more than implied.
Roy's mouth quirked a bit at what now occurred to him. "Puts a whole new light on that 'friends forever' mush that's on greeting cards."
Edward chuckled softly as he gazed at his headstone with almost unseeing eyes. "The day you start giving me greeting cards, anyone greeting cards, Roy Mustang, is the day I check you into the psychiatric ward myself."
"Fair enough." Roy gave in without a second thought to it. Taking another swallow of the champagne he lounged back a bit further on the grass, leaning back now on his free elbow. "Is there anything you wish you could have done before you died?"
"Besides tell Alphonse that I love him?" Edward's eyes lowered as a wistful smile crept onto his lips. "No. I was still a kid, despite being a genius. Kids just don't think about things like that. Or at least I didn't, perhaps because I never had the time."
"Odd," Roy smirked somewhat, "when I'd been the age you died at I would have wanted a first kiss and sex… in no particular order."
Edward snorted as he rolled his eyes. "Why does that not surprise me? How can you even try to deny anymore that you're a manwhore when you say stuff like that?"
"Healthy – "
" – sexual appetite." Edward filled in, causing Roy to grin. "I know."
"It's the truth though."
"And what would you wish for now?" Edward asked, as clearly Roy had no trouble getting kisses or sex these days. The awkward initial, in Roy's case, hour, was already over.
Roy didn't answer right away, taking a few swigs of the champagne here and there before finally he was forced to admit the truth as best he knew it. "I don't really know." And he cradled the bottle in his hand at an angle. "My mother, what friends I have, they all know I care for them. I'd like to think I'd have no regrets or words unsaid when it comes to them. I've done everything right by them that I can, and by Hazel too for that matter."
Edward couldn't help but find it endearing that Roy would include his pet, despite how much he knew Roy loved that squirrel, and the squirrel him.
"As for you…" Roy trailed off briefly as his eyes found Edward's again. "I know I can never give you everything you deserve, you deserve so much in this world –"
"I'm no longer lonely." Edward cut him off gently, a shadowy smile on his lips. "To no longer be lonely was all I ever wanted. And you've given me my escape from that, and from so much more."
Roy smiled faintly, shaking his head. "If you think that an escape from loneliness is all you deserve, all I'd ever wish to give you, you're mistaken."
Edward gazed at the man for a long moment they spent in silence, before finally looking away to stare at his headstone. "You've given me a lot, Roy. More than I ever thought I'd have again. Thank you… for everything."
"Are you doing better now?" Roy asked as his gaze found where the books he needed to burn had tumbled off to.
"Yes." Edward answered simply, but it was the truth all the same. "I know you didn't want me to see where I died… but all the same, thank you for letting me."
"I only worry that you'll be okay." Roy argued, looking back at the ghost who met his eyes. "I knew it'd be hard on you to see it. It hurts me to see you suffering. But I'd never leave you."
"I'll be okay." Edward answered softly. "Just give me tonight. Being with you makes me feel better, feel safer."
"I'll give you the rest of my life." Roy corrected, his gaze locked with Edward's own.
Neither were too certain how long they spent just looking at each other, before Roy turned to grab the books back in hand, stuffing them under an arm while he held the champagne bottle in his opposite hand.
Edward frowned as Roy got up, "what are you doing?" He asked as Roy began to saunter off across the grass away from his headstone. Without waiting for an answer he quickly followed.
Roy didn't answer until he was a goodly distance away from Edward's grave. Even then he dumped the books onto the grass before he answered, the paper notes inside spilling out from where he'd stuffed them. "Doing as you asked."
And Edward finally understood with abrupt clarity as Roy emptied the rest of the champagne bottle onto the books, liberally splashing them with the alcohol. But what he didn't understand, was Roy suddenly producing a box of matches, shaking one out and lighting it, before holding it out.
"Take it." Roy spoke firmly, the lit match flickering between them as Edward stared.
Edward flicked his gaze up to Roy's unwavering gaze, before lowering it back to the match, and slowly, he did. "But I thought – "
"You deserve to more than me." Roy interrupted gently as he stuffed the box of matches back away.
Edward held the match up to eye level, just watching the small flame burn lower, before his mouth set into a grim line. "You're right… I do." And distantly cognizant of Roy backing up for safety, he dropped the match onto the champagne-soaked books.
They had been catalyst in ending his life… and Edward watched dispassionately as they erupted into high flames, spurred on by the alcohol in the champagne.
Slowly he floated backwards to Roy's side, landing on the grass to stand beside him as they both watched the paper curl and burn, falling to the burning ground as ash. Watched the ink glow before it was fully destroyed. Neither of them said a word as they watched the flames eat away at the books and Edward's notes, just stood there together as a sense of justice echoed between them.
When the books had been totally destroyed, nothing more than ash littering a charcoaled section of ground, and when the flames had all been doused from catching anything else on fire, they left.
It was halfway in their walk back to town and the inn, when Edward finally spoke. "Thanks for doing this with me."
"I'm happy to." Roy replied honestly, and the mood shifted somewhat brighter the rest of the way.
It was quite late when they got back to the inn, and Roy was more than happy to seek out his rented room and bed. He'd had quite the day. But he knew that Edward had felt it ten times over. So he quietly got changed, and took care of matters in the bathroom, before he made his way over to the bed.
Edward had already claimed the right side of the bed.
Roy cracked a grin as he saw, but said nothing as he flopped down onto the left, pulling the covers up around him as he lay his head back against the pillow. "You should know… Alphonse plans to move one day. I'll try to arrange it so that you'll be able to see him when he moves, if you wish it."
Edward's silvery gaze darkened somewhat as he blinked up at the ceiling, hands linked and folded under his head as he lay there next to Roy. "Move?" He closed his eyes briefly. "I guess I can understand why. We lived alone in that big house for a long time, now with it being just him… and after I died there like that. After mom died there… I don't blame him. I just hope whoever buys it doesn't do too much remodeling. I have fond memories of that house, believe it or not."
Roy turned his head to look at his companion, before shifting onto his side, resting his head in the hollow of a bent elbow. "You like the house?"
Edward looked over to meet Roy's curious gaze. "Yes." And on inspiration he turned onto his side as well so he could watch Roy easier. "I grew up there. It may not be my home anymore, I like our home… but I think every kid always has at least one fond memory of their first home."
Roy tried not to smile with too much pleasure at it being referred to as 'our home'. "Will you tell me about this teacher Alphonse mentioned? I can't understand why you'd need one."
Edward's smile was mixed with a grimace, but he laughed. "We were impatient to learn. Impatient to get good enough so that we could… well, you know what we must have done when we finished our training."
Roy nodded, but did not speak.
"Our mom had left us some money before she died. We used it to pay for the training." Edward continued. "Her name was Izumi Curtis… and she was as scary as she was strong."
Roy smiled as Edward continued on with his story and explanation, settling in among the covers as he listened. He wasn't too tired just yet… definitely not tired enough to not listen to Edward. And so as the minutes rolled into an hour and began again, Roy lay there just listening, laughing or smirking at times, and watching Edward tell his story.
After Edward finished, leaving off where he knew Roy would be able to piece the holes together, he began to quietly laugh as he watched the man.
"What?" Roy smiled, his head maneuvering around to try and find a softer spot of the pillow his arm had ended up tucked up underneath.
"I can't believe you didn't yawn through any of that." Edward grinned through residual laughter.
"I never find you boring, and it was not a boring story anyway. I'm glad you told me." Roy admonished him almost fondly.
Edward rolled his eyes, but still smiled. "So what did you think?"
Roy hummed a moment in thought, "I think you had it a lot harder than I did. Did you want to go see her as well one day? I'm sure I can find her with your help."
"She'd try to kill you for sure." Edward grimaced. "Don't worry, I'm fine with not seeing her again. Not that I dislike her… but I would rather not hurt her to keep her from trying to hurt you."
They spoke a few minutes longer on the subject before Edward finally could no longer ignore the fact that Roy was now yawning at least every twenty seconds.
"Sleep. Now." Edward insisted adamantly.
Roy hesitated, about to argue that he was fine, before he gave in. If Edward was telling him to get some sleep, the ghost was probably feeling settled enough once again. So he'd take it for what it was… even though he'd been prepared to stay up the whole night with Edward. "Well there is that breakfast the innkeeper mentioned that I'd hate to miss."
"Just remember that it's the food, not his wife. Even if she is the cook." Edward informed him sternly.
"Don't worry, she's married. But does that mean I'm not allowed to even kiss her if she's wearing one of those 'kiss the cook' aprons?"
Edward promptly smacked him with a pillow.
Roy yelped in protest, laughing as Edward set the pillow back down. "Okay, sorry. You crazy ghost."
Edward could only roll his eyes and shake his head as Roy tried not to laugh. But the moment Roy reached for the lamp switch he lost control of a noise of protest.
"Ed?" Roy frowned, looking back around at the suddenly intensely uncomfortable looking ghost. "You okay?"
Edward nodded meekly, settling back down onto the bed. "Yeah. Sorry… I thought you were going to roll off the bed." He could have flinched at the lameness of that excuse, but as it was he settled for laying there stiffly.
Roy felt like he was caught in limbo, hand still halfway outstretched, body still angled to assist the reach, and his eyes still glued to the ghost. It took him a moment before he understood, and he felt himself smile as he withdrew his hand without turning off the light. "Goodnight, Edward." He murmured as he pulled the covers up around him and closed his eyes.
Edward looked over at him quickly, uncertainty and shock in his eyes. "The light?"
"If that innkeeper is making me pay so much for using the room just for one night, I'm going to run up his electric bill." Roy yawned, before turning over onto his stomach to bury a smile in the pillow as he let sleep take him.
Edward stared wide-eyed and slightly open-mouthed in shock, before he began to smile. "Thank you… Roy." He whispered as he listened to the man's breathing even out in sleep. Just for tonight, he needed it… and was grateful, if not embarrassed, that Roy had understood. Yet he curled up on his side of the bed to watch the man sleep, forgetting all about the book he'd brought to read.