Lee
He looked at his ringing phone to see that it was Norah. He frowned. She didn't normally call him. She usually just texted something funny or her whereabouts to appease his fear of her being out too late and with strangers, but even that hadn't been happening lately due to his royally screwing everything up between them. He'd left her alone because he knew she was trying to pick up the pieces and move on. She wanted space from him. But she was calling him now, which meant something was going on. His heart started to pound. Barney groaned and shifted on the bench across from him, getting disturbed by all the noise. He'd been trying to catch up on some sleep on the plane.
"Answer the damn thing already," he growled.
"Norah?" Lee said, answering it and plugging his other ear with his finger to block out Barney's grumbling. "What's wrong?"
"Dad...had...a...heart...attack," Norah said through sobs.
"Your dad had a heart attack?" Lee repeated. This made Barney's head spin to look at him.
"Yes," Norah cried. "It's all my fault. I was yelling at him..."
"Where are you?"
"Outside the hospital."
"Is he okay?"
"They're getting him stable...going to do some tests. They said something about putting a stent in. I don't know. I just...please, Lee can you come?"
"I'll be there," he said instantly. Barney raised a brow in his peripheral vision.
"Okay. Please hurry."
"I'll let you know when I land."
"Okay."
Lee hung up and bounced his phone off his leg anxiously. Norah was in distress. He hated hearing her in such distress.
"What's happening?"
"I gotta get to New Mexico. Norah's dad..." he trailed off.
"I heard that part. Does this mean we're giving up on our ghost?"
Lee looked at him, torn between what he needed to do and what he wanted to do. They'd spent the rest of the day searching and hadn't gotten anywhere. There had been no clues in her apartment either. Lee knew Melanie's killer was long gone. He'd just been hanging onto false hope that he was wrong.
"We both know he's gone," Lee said. "He'll be found when he wants to be found."
"So you want to wait for him to find you? That's what I'm hearing," Barney commented. Lee clenched his fist. Norah's distressed voice was ringing in his ears.
"I'll be ready for him. I gotta get to her," Lee said firmly. Barney gave a slight chuckle as he stood up and headed for the cockpit. "What?"
"And you say you don't love this girl. My niece," Barney added for good measure.
"I never said I didn't love her," Lee argued.
"Right. She's better off without you. I get it."
"You know it's true," Lee insisted, following to sit in the co-pilot's chair.
"Right now I tend to agree with you," Barney said, flicking switches and bringing the plane to life. "Since you've got a guy with a grudge coming for you. Something happens to her, and I'll kill you."
Lee said nothing else as he fought off a yawn. He had a while before he would get to her, but he was going to her. Maybe he had messed things up, but he would always be there for her. He'd never deny her that.
Because he really did love her.
Toll
He waited for Victoria to come back, and when she did an hour later, he could tell she'd been crying. He worried about this situation pushing her over the edge. He fidgeted with his fingers on the table, watching her grab a glass of water and lean against the sink facing him.
"You okay?" he asked her.
"I can't do it, Nick," she answered. "I can't see him." Toll looked at her and saw the pain in her eyes. He knew what she was thinking. She didn't want her son to know she was an addict, that she couldn't take care of him and had given him away because of it. She didn't want him to think that she had chose drugs over him.
"What will you regret more?" he asked softly. "Meeting him and explaining what happened or sending him away and never getting to know him?"
Victoria clutched her glass tighter and inhaled sharply through her nose. Her hand started to shake after a moment.
"I can't do it," she whispered.
"Okay," he said with a slow nod. "Then you don't do it." She emptied her glass and went to her bedroom, closing the door softly behind her. He stayed sitting at the table, knowing that what he wanted to do would probably make her hate him, but he needed to do it.
He needed to meet his nephew.
Yang
It had been a long morning and afternoon at the hospital. Yang had left his gun in his car without his neighbor seeing him hide it since she was still in shock. He had walked in with her, and now he was waiting for her to finish talking to the police.
Lauren.
Her name was Lauren. He rolled it over in his mind. It was a nice name. He looked up at the NOPD officer who came to stand in front of him. This was why he hadn't wanted to get involved. He didn't want anyone looking into him.
"Yin?" the officer said, looking at his pad of paper.
"Yes."
"You wanna tell me what happened and how you came to rescue Mrs. Berg?"
"No problem," Yang said, nodding. He kept it brief and to the point, ensuring his intervention looked like self-defense. The officer nodded and took notes. Then he surprised Yang by reaching to shake his hand.
"You saved her life," he told Yang. "You're a good man."
Yang said nothing as the officer went to meet his female partner, and they walked out together. He felt mixed feelings. How was it that he had failed to save his own wife but had managed to save someone else's? He stood when Lauren approached him cautiously. They were finally releasing her. He felt sad inside as he looked at her injuries on her arms and face.
"I hate to bother you," she said, "but could I trouble you for a ride to the women's shelter?"
"No bother," Yang promised. "Come on." They walked out together, and he checked to make sure her husband wasn't waiting for her. He wasn't. Yang hoped he'd been arrested. He held open the car door for her, and she gave him a small smile as she climbed in. She didn't say much as they drove, but that was okay with Yang. He wasn't big on words anyway.
"Thank you," she said when they arrived at the shelter. "I don't know what else to say other than that."
"Don't go back," Yang told her. "Okay?"
"Okay." She nodded, and tears slipped down her cheeks. He reached to squeeze her hand, and she squeezed it back. Then she got out, and he was alone again. He doubted he would ever see Lauren again, but it made him feel good for a tiny moment knowing that she was going to be okay.
Gunner & Caesar
Caesar had woken up that day in a panic and had gone to check on Sasha. She'd still been breathing, so he'd relaxed. He'd spent the morning on edge, but by late afternoon, he'd been feeling a bit better. He found Char making dinner with Gunner sitting at their table. The big man had finally come inside. Caesar wondered why Yang or Toll hadn't traded off with him yet.
"Rough day?" Caesar asked him.
"No," Gunner answered. "I'm starving."
"Well, you came to the right place," Char told him, patting his shoulder as she passed him.
"Sasha okay?" Gunner asked, sticking a piece of cheese into his mouth.
"Yea."
"Good."
The sound of running feet reached their ears, and Will rounded the corner.
"Sasha wants up," he said. Caesar dusted off his hands to dispose of crumbs and went to go get her. They'd been sent home with a small wheelchair for her until her arm was good enough to use crutches. It broke his heart to see her sitting in it.
"Hello, baby," he said, reaching to pick her up from the couch. "Thank you for not getting up without help."
"Thank you for not forgetting about me," Sasha said back, kissing his cheek.
"I'd never forget about you," Caesar promised. He carried her out to the kitchen, pushing her wheel chair in front of him before setting her down into her wheelchair at the table. Char started to dish the food up on the plates.
"How's our patient?" Gunner asked, smiling at her. Sasha's eyes were bright at least, and she was grinning.
"I'm gonna join wheel chair basketball!" she exclaimed.
"Well, at least nothing holds you down for long," Gunner noted, chuckling.
"Let's save the sports for when you're not wearing two casts," Char told her, moving her to sit at the smaller table they'd set up for her so she could reach.
"Okay," Sasha sighed.
"You won't be in a wheel chair forever anyway," Will added, "so you can't join."
"Awww."
Caesar didn't know whether to laugh or cry that his daughter was disappointed at not being in a wheel chair forever.
"Yang rescued a neighbor last night," Gunner told Caesar as they sat off to the side sipping their coffees.
"Oh?"
"Yea. Apparently she was getting beaten up by her husband."
"Is the husband still breathing?" Caesar asked, chuckling.
"Seems to be."
"He always had a bit more self-restraint than us," Caesar mused. Gunner snorted.
"It's still in his blood," he reasoned. "It always will be."
Caesar said nothing as he watched his family talk and laugh. Maybe it wasn't always in your blood. Maybe you could get out and have a normal life. He was thinking about it more and more. He just didn't know how to say it out loud.
Tool
Bobby was a great kid. Tool was realizing this very quickly. He was smart, funny, charming, and easygoing. He reminded Tool of Toll. A lot.
"Are you upset about me not finding your mother?" Tool asked, cringing inside at the lie. He knew he owed Victoria more than Bobby, though. He was respecting her wishes.
"A little," Bobby answered with a sigh. "But I get it. She might not even want to meet me anyway."
Tool caught sight of Toll hovering by the entrance, and he knew Toll was there to meet his nephew. He wondered how pissed off Victoria was going to be when she found this out. This changed the game drastically, and it made his white lie more complicated. He decided because of that, he'd put it all on Toll.
"What if I told you I knew your uncle?" Tool asked, and Bobby's head snapped up.
"Like, my biological uncle?" he clarified.
"Uh huh," Tool said with a nod and a smile. "Would you want to meet him?"
"Yea!" Bobby exclaimed, growing excited. "I didn't even think about my mom having any siblings."
"He's the only one. He also will have a better idea on how to find your mother," Tool said, and he nodded his head in the direction of Toll, who was walking inside the room slowly. He gave Toll a meaningful look, which Toll gave an apologetic one back in return. At least he understood he was in the hot seat now. Bobby turned to see him, and the surprise on his face was immense.
"Hi," Toll said, looking nervous. Bobby looked ecstatic.
"Kid," Tool said, pulling out his pipe. "Meet your Uncle Nick."
Toll
He'd been very nervous to meet his nephew, but it had all melted away the moment he saw Bobby grinning at him. He looked like their father...so much so that it took him off guard. He also saw his younger self in him too and their mother's eyes. Victoria had been right.
They'd gone to dinner, and Bobby had asked him a million questions. Toll had answered the ones about Victoria very carefully, but it was hard not to admit they talked.
"Does she not want to meet me?" Bobby asked now. Toll knew he had to get home soon before Victoria figured out what he was doing. She hadn't called or texted him in the last few hours, so he worried she already knew.
"It's complicated," Toll answered.
"Why?"
"It just is. I can't speak for her."
"Does she think I hate her? I don't hate her," Bobby said quickly. "If I hated her, I wouldn't be wanting to meet her."
"True, but for her, it's complicated."
"Did she really not want me?" Bobby asked next, causing Toll to feel like he'd been slapped. He knew he couldn't leave that question unanswered, no matter what his inner Victoria Voice was saying.
"Don't ever think that," he told Bobby firmly. "Alright? She wanted you, but she knew you'd have a better chance at a good life with your parents. That's all she wanted for you: a good life."
"Can you tell her that I don't care about the reason why she gave me up? I just want to meet her," Bobby said earnestly. "You do talk to her, right?" Toll's heart twisted a little, and he nodded slowly.
"I do. I'll tell her."
"I'm gonna stay here a bit longer. My parents are kind of mad at me, and I'm not ready to go home just yet."
"Alright. Don't get your hopes up, though, okay?"
"Too late," Bobby said, smiling ruefully.
"If it means anything to you," Toll said, getting up and tossing down some bills onto the table for dinner, "she went to see you when you turned 18. Just from a distance, but she wanted to see you grown up."
"Oh," Bobby said, sounding surprised and slightly emotional.
"She loves you. She's just scared. I'll talk to her, though," Toll promised. He reached to squeeze Bobby's shoulder tightly before they walked out together.
"Does that mean my grandfather lied to me about not knowing how to find her?" Bobby asked. Toll laughed.
"Cut him some slack. He's a little bit afraid of your mother."
"Oh..."
"He also wanted to respect her wishes. He didn't know she was your biological mother until she asked him to find you, and then he didn't know how to tell her, so it he felt stuck about what to do when you showed up."
"I get it."
Toll dropped him back off at Tool's, where Bobby gave him a hug and advised he understood what happened. Then Toll went home.
He wondered how much shit he was in with his sister for doing this.
Gunner
He heeded Victoria's text and went to her apartment where he found her pacing. He felt concerned, especially when she started crying.
"What's going on?" he asked.
"My son is here," Victoria answered.
"He is?" Gunner knew about Bobby. She'd told him all about it.
"He discovered Tool is his adoptive grandfather..."
"What?!"
"...and he wants to meet me, but I don't want to meet him," Victoria finished. Gunner's head was spinning as he tried to keep up with all the information.
"Did you know Tool was his...?" he started.
"No," she answered, cutting him off. "And Nick hasn't been home all evening, but I know exactly where he is."
"Where is he?" Gunner asked, not understanding.
"He's been with Bobby," Victoria answered. "I know it."
"You don't know that for sure..." Gunner tried, but Toll coming up the stairs and into the apartment made them both turn to look at him. The guilt was written very clearly on his face.
"You bastard," Victoria said angrily.
"He's my nephew! I had a right to meet him," Toll said defensively.
"What did you tell him about me?" she demanded. "Huh? Did you tell him his momma is a crazy ass addict?!"
"No! I dodged his questions about you. I only said that you wanted a good life for him and that you do love him but just aren't ready to meet him yet."
"You realize you've made me look like utter shit," Victoria said. "His own mother can't meet him but his uncle can? I'm a shit."
"Stop it," Toll ordered. "You're not a shit."
Gunner felt very awkward watching this argument. He debated on leaving, but he wanted to be there for Victoria. He just didn't know what to do or say.
"I hope you didn't promise him I'd go meet him," Victoria warned.
"I said I'd talk to you. Vic, he's an amazing kid. He's not angry at you at all. He just wants to meet you. Come on," Toll said, going over to her and placing his hands on her shoulders. "What if it was you? You'd want your mother to meet you, right?"
"Don't do that," Victoria said, smacking his hands away.
"Just meet him once. That's all. See how it goes," Toll urged. "Okay? You'll love him. He's just like...us. He's the perfect blend of us with a bit of his adoptive parents in him."
Victoria looked like she was going to cave. She met Gunner's eyes, and he gave her an encouraging look. He knew her inner turmoil had a lot to do with her past as an addict. She didn't want her son to look at her through that lens.
"He laughs like Dad," Toll added softly.
"Damn you," Victoria growled. She ran a hand through her hair and sighed. "Alright. I'll meet him tomorrow."
"You won't regret it," Toll said, hugging her. Gunner pulled out his phone to see that Yang was calling him. He frowned. That was rare.
"I'll be back," he told them as he stepped out into the hall to answer his phone. "What's up, Squirt?" He listened for a moment, and then he felt surprise, then anger.
"Gunner?" Toll asked, joining him in the hall and noticing his face. Gunner gripped the phone tightly in his hand.
"We'll be right there."
Yang
He was trying to keep Char calm when Gunner and Toll showed up. Will and Sasha were inside.
"What happened?!" Toll demanded, jogging towards them. "Where's Caesar?"
"He gave chase," Char answered, pointing down the road. They all looked to see Caesar slowly walking back. He looked angry.
"How many?" Gunner asked.
"Just the one. He...he was just standing there watching us," Char whispered. "It was so...creepy."
"Where were you?" Toll asked Yang. "Weren't you keeping watch?"
"I just got here," Yang answered. "In time to see the man run."
"Caesar was already chasing him by the time Yang got out of the car," Char went on to explain. "He stayed to make sure no one else was hanging around and waiting to get us alone."
"Shit," Toll said, rubbing the back of his head anxiously. "Maybe you guys oughta go somewhere else for a bit?"
"I think we should," Char agreed. "I've already called my mother."
"Well?" Gunner asked when Caesar approached them.
"Son of a bitch was too fast," Caesar answered.
"Mom?" Will asked from the door. Char gave Yang's arm an appreciative squeeze as she went to console her son. Caesar was breathing heavily as he stood with his arms crossed and feet apart.
"Did you get a look at him?" Toll asked.
"No," Caesar answered. "He was wearing a mask."
"Char said you're gonna go to her mom's?" Toll prompted.
"She is. I'm staying here and dealing with this bastard."
"I stay too," Yang offered.
"Me three," Gunner agreed.
"I can," Toll started.
"No, man, you got stuff going on," Caesar interrupted. "I talked to Tool earlier today. It's cool. The three of us got this, and we'll call you if we need you."
"Y'all just decided that for me, huh?" Toll asked.
"Someone has to be our backup," Caesar reasoned.
"All right."
"Need help packing?" Gunner asked Caesar.
"Nah, man. Just keep an eye out."
"Okay."
They watched Caesar go inside, and Yang shivered. He felt like something was coming, but he didn't know what.
Norah
It was 12 hours since she'd called Lee and asked him to come. She hoped he'd been able to get a flight that night. It was 3:30 in the morning, and she was standing outside the hospital smoking, ignoring the looks from some people as they walked by her. She was going to quit. She really was. She was just really stressed out right now, and when she had nothing else to help her cope, she turned to smoking. She was looking across the parking lot, wondering what to do when a hand pulled the cigarette out of her fingers. She snapped her head to see Lee looking at her, his boot grinding out her cigarette on the ground.
"I leave you alone for five minutes and you're back to being a live chimney," he commented, his tone slightly teasing. She knew he was trying to make her feel better. The effort made her burst into tears. He pulled her into a hug, and she clung to him tightly.
"I'm so scared," she whimpered, pressing her face against his neck. "I don't know what to do, Lee."
"Just try to breathe, alright?" he replied, smoothing her back with his hand. "If you can breathe, then you'll be okay." She tried, and after a few breaths, she started to feel a little bit calmer. Being in his arms was helping her feel calmer too. She did her best to forget they'd ever crossed that line and then crossed it back.
"How is he?" Lee asked.
"Stable. He's been admitted and being monitored and had a bunch of tests done to discern the problem, and they're going to do the stent procedure tomorrow morning," Norah answered. "I haven't been able to see him. I...I can't bring myself to, but I can't go home either. It just keeps making me think about Mom. Rose said he's been sleeping mostly anyway between tests. I'm such a shitty daughter. I can't even stand at my father's bedside when he's sick."
"You're not a shitty daughter, Norah. And you've been here the whole time, just not in his room with him."
"I'm sorry I made you come out here," she said, pulling away from him now and wiping at her face to get rid of the tears.
"You didn't make me do anything," he told her. "I came because I wanted to."
Without really knowing why, she decided she needed to bring up what her father had shouted at her before this all happened. It was something that spun around in her mind a lot in the last while when she wasn't thinking about her father.
"Dad told me Barney is a mercenary," she said. "Is that what you are too? All of you?" His face looked slightly pained.
"Yes."
"Are you just in it for the money? Do you care about who you're killing?"
"Norah, listen..."
"Norah," Rose said, coming out the sliding doors and walking towards them. "You can't hide out here forever. Dad woke up and is looking for yo-...oh, hi." She paused, seeing Lee. She looked back and forth between them.
"Hi," Lee said back.
"I'll be in in a minute," Norah told her. "Okay?"
"You better."
Rose looked almost hesitant as she turned around and went back inside. Norah was feeling mixed emotions as she looked at Lee standing next to her. Knowing what he did gave her images in her head that she didn't want to have.
"Norah," he said again. "It's not about the money."
"You said you saved people," Norah said accusingly.
"We do." There was an edge of hurt in his voice, as if he thought she was indicating she couldn't believe that he could help people.
"But you kill so many others," she pointed out. He flexed his fingers, and the muscle in his jaw jumped slightly.
"Anyone we kill is someone who needed to be killed," he said after a moment. "There are a lot of bad people in this world, Norah. What we do helps ensure the safety of a lot of innocent people. That's all I'm gonna say about it." He looked at her seriously, and she knew he was telling the truth. She'd honestly suspected it was what he was doing anyway.
"The bad guys have family too," she said quietly.
"I know."
"Is that why you look so haunted sometimes?"
"Yea," he answered. "I'm not made entirely of stone, you know." This satisfied her a little, knowing that he was at least bothered by it to some degree. It wasn't the ideal job she wanted him to have, but in a strange way, it suited him.
"Is it kind of like the SAS? You get missions to do and told where to go?" she asked.
"Yea," he said with a nod.
"I'm not a hundred percent thrilled, but I...I get that there needs to be people like you to...to keep us safe," she said. She saw Rose waving at her from the sliding glass doors, so she had to end this conversation.
"It's okay," Lee said, seeing Rose too. "We can talk later."
"Not about this," Norah told him. "I don't want to know anymore about it."
"Alright."
She walked to the doors, slipping inside when they hissed open. Lee followed her, and they both walked with Rose to Joe's room. He was awake, and he smiled weakly at Norah as she came in.
"Dad," she said, rushing over to him.
"I'm alright," Joe promised, gripping her hand when she slipped hers into his.
"I'm sorry," she blurted.
"It's okay," he said.
"We are gonna go home and get some rest," Rose said, standing on the other side of the bed. "They said you're stable. They're taking you in the morning to put the stent in."
"Sounds like a good time," Joe tried to joke. He caught sight of Lee hovering by the door and frowned slightly. "Who's he?"
"Oh, um," Norah said, looking at Lee and then back at Joe. "That's Lee, Dad. My landlord and, uh, boss."
"Why is he here?"
"I called him," Norah answered. Joe raised a brow but didn't say anything else. He turned his head to look at Rose again.
"How's Oscar doing?" he asked.
"Scared, but he'll be okay. He's with Winston at home."
"Okay."
Norah moved out of the way, feeling guilty suddenly. Her father was in that hospital bed because of her. She'd pushed him over the edge. She didn't really remember much of what happened right after she called for the ambulance. Rose had gotten Winston to pick up Oscar from wherever he'd been, and she and Norah had been at the hospital ever since.
"Hey," Lee said as she walked past him to the hallway. She leaned against the wall, pressing her hands against her face. She felt his presence moment later, his hands pulling her into him. She let him hold her because she didn't know what else to do in that moment. He said nothing, just smoothed her hair with his fingers repeatedly in a slow, steady motion.
"Dad wants to say goodbye," Rose said, appearing. She was giving Lee a wary look. Norah pulled back and wiped at her eyes.
"Okay," she said, going back into the room. Joe was looking at her as she came in.
"I'll be alright," he promised. "I'm as tough as they come, you know."
"You better be," Norah warned, trying to be playful but failing to pull it off. She grew teary again.
"Go home, get some rest, and after a few hours, it'll be all over," Joe promised.
"Okay."
"And I don't buy the whole 'he's my landlord' crap. That boy has got it bad for you," Joe went on. "He looks at you the way I looked at your mother."
"Dad..."
"Just be careful," Joe said softly. "All I ever wanted was for you to be safe. That's all."
"I know," Norah said, nodding. "I'll be careful."
"Good girl. Now, go home. I'll see you soon."
"Love you, Dad," she said, moving to kiss the side of his head.
"Love you too," Joe replied, reaching to pat her shoulder before she stood up. She waved at the doorway and then found Lee and Rose waiting for her. They walked out together, and Norah pondered on her father's words. Perhaps Lee did have feelings for her, but he was working very hard to keep them to himself. It made her feel sad inside at what could have been.
Rose
It was so hard to see her father in a hospital bed like that. She was glad no one could see her hands shaking in the dark as she drove them all home. She walked ahead of Lee and Norah and was met by Oscar crashing into her and holding on tightly.
"Hi, bud," she said, kissing the top of his head. Winston was standing behind him, giving her a sympathetic look.
"He had a hard time sleeping, and he kept waking up looking for you," he said apologetically.
"It's alright." Rose hugged Oscar back tightly. She knew he was scared.
"How is he?" Winston asked.
"He's okay," Rose answered. "Tired, but okay."
"Good."
"Is he really okay?" Oscar asked.
"Yes, love. He's okay."
"Who're you?" Oscar questioned, finally seeing Lee with Norah as they got closer.
"This is my friend, Lee," Norah answered, bending to hug him too. "He's crashing on our couch for a few hours." Rose caught Winston's look, but she didn't respond. She wasn't exactly fond of the idea either, but she'd met Lee before and her sister hadn't been murdered in her sleep yet, so he must be alright. She did notice Lee take in the empty shirt sleeve as he examined Winston.
"You must be Oscar," Lee said to her son after looking at him next. "I've heard a lot about you."
"Really?" Oscar asked, puffing his chest out a little. Rose smiled.
"Oh, yes. You're a genius with a knack for birdwatching," Lee said. Norah ruffled Oscar's hair as she went inside. Oscar followed Lee as he went in after her, chattering away about math of all things. Lee gave him his full attention, listening intently.
"You want me to stay?" Winston asked Rose when they were alone.
"I'll be okay, but thank you," Rose answered. "I know you gotta work in a few hours." He wrapped his arm around her as tight as he could, and she rested her cheek against his shoulder. She wanted everything to be all right. She hated feeling this scared.
"Call me if you need me," Winston instructed after they ended their embrace.
"I will," she promised. He touched her face lightly and then left. She loved that he respected her enough to not kiss her in front of her son just yet. She realized she was falling in love with him, and it didn't scare her.
Norah & Lee
She tossed and turned long enough before getting out of bed and padding down the hall to the living room where Lee was on the couch. He had an arm behind his head, but his eyes opened right away as soon as she approached him.
"You okay?" he asked.
"No," she whispered. He sat up slowly, and she sank down on the couch next to him.
"What's on your mind?" he questioned, reaching to smooth his hand across her back.
"I don't even know where to start," she said, her voice sounding thick. "But I do keep thinking about us."
"I'm sorry, Norah..." he started.
"I'm not," she cut him off. "I'm not sorry it happened. I'm sorry you can't seem to realize that it's okay to love someone."
"Norah..."
"I'm over it," she interrupted again. "I am. It just pops back in every so often, especially when you touch me." He froze, his hand still on her back. She looked at him, and he went to pull it back when she stopped him.
"I won't," he tried.
"I have to get past it," she stopped him. "And I will. It's fine." She surprised him by pressing into him, tucking her head under his chin. He put his arms around her instinctively, and she held him back. He smoothed his thumbs against her bare arms, feeling her heart beating against his chest. His mind didn't stop itself fast enough. It flashed back to the last time he'd felt her heart against his chest when he'd been on top of her with her fingers dug into his back.
"It's my fault," she said quietly, making him come back to the room.
"What is?"
"I was yelling at him. I was angry that he'd hid Barney from us. He got so mad at me..."
"Norah, you didn't cause his heart attack."
"I triggered it," she whispered. "I did. I caused it, just like I caused Mom to kill herself."
"Whoa, whoa, whoa," Lee said, moving to hold her in front of him so he could look at her properly. "Norah, there's no way you're responsible for either event."
"I fought with her," Norah went on, tears streaming down her face. "I wouldn't clean my room like she asked, and I went out to play with Rose even after she said no because my room was a mess..."
"Norah," Lee said, knowing where this was going.
"I pushed her over the edge," Norah whimpered. "Just like I pushed Dad, and he almost died..."
"No," Lee said almost fiercely, moving his hands to hold either side of her face firmly. "It's not your fault, Norah. Not at all. Please believe that." He felt her tears slide over his fingers, leaving a warm trail. He smoothed one away with his thumb, and she gulped with fresh tears.
"It is," she insisted.
"Then it's my fault my brother is dead," Lee declared. "If we are using your logic, I'm to blame for his death."
"Lee..."
"What? Your crazy logic can only apply to you?" he demanded. He wasn't about to admit that he really did believe he was the cause of his brother's death. Only Barney knew that.
She swallowed and closed her eyes briefly, opening her mouth to breathe after a moment since her nose was too stuffed. She knew he had her dead to rights. It was best to give up the fight.
"Fine," she said. "But I am the common denominator for both incidents."
"C'mere," he said, pulling her back into him again. He rested a hand on her head with his other wrapped around her waist. She wrapped her arms under his to hold his shoulders tightly. She had nothing else to say.
After a while, he picked her up into his arms and carried her back to bed. He moved to set her down and leave her there when she grabbed his hand.
"Just stay," she whispered. He didn't want to argue, especially since it was after five in the morning. Without a word, he tucked himself in behind her, holding her close. He felt bad as she continued to cry against him. He simply ran his fingers over her hair repeatedly until he felt her stop crying and start breathing deeply, finally asleep. He shifted her hair and kissed the back of her neck gently before moving his arm to drape across her lower stomach.
"I love you," he murmured, finally closing his eyes. He knew he was crazy for denying himself this relationship, but he wasn't crazy for doing it to keep her safe.
He just hoped one day she'd understand.
Rose
She felt like a zombie after only getting four and a half hours of sleep. She barely registered what her hands were doing, but they'd done the morning routine of coffee and toast/cereal/muffin/oatmeal for so long now that she didn't have to pay attention.
"Mom?" Oscar said, coming out. Apparently he still couldn't sleep, but altogether he'd gotten more than Rose.
"Hi, honey."
"Lee's gone."
Rose frowned, stepping back to look through across the room to the couch and noticing that Lee was indeed missing from it. She exhaled roughly and set down her butter knife.
"Mom?"
"Stay here," she ordered, marching down to Norah's room. Enough was enough. Their father was in the hospital for crying out loud. How could Norah even think to have sex with a guy who didn't even want to be with her right now?!
She booted the door open with her foot and charged inside. Norah lurched upwards, her hair messy and surprise on her face.
"What're you doing?" she asked.
"Are you insane?" Rose demanded, ignoring her. She stopped next to the bed and crossed her arms. "Dad's possibly dying and you're in here screwing a guy?!"
"Rose," Norah tried.
"No, you listen to me," Rose cut her off, pointing a finger at her face. "I've made excuses for you for too long. You need to grow up, and you need to stop acting like you're the only one affected by everything."
"Rose!"
"I thought it was a good thing that you went on your self-discovery mission cos I thought maybe, just maybe, you'd realize that you can be an adult and you can handle things and you don't have to be an idiot anymore!"
Norah was staring at her, shocked. That's when Rose realized her sister was alone in her bed.
"Hi," Lee said from behind her, making her turn to see him standing there fully dressed and holding a tray of coffees and a takeout bag. "What did I miss?"
"Um," Rose said, feeling incredibly guilty suddenly. "Nothing." She watched him walk past her towards Norah, handing her a coffee after she sat up slowly.
"Thanks," she said to him, taking it. Rose stood there feeling very stupid now.
"Just for the record," Lee said to her, "there was no shagging going on in here last night."
"I see that," Rose said faintly.
"It's okay, Lee," Norah started, but he held up a hand to stop her.
"I think you need to give your sister a bit more credit," he went on, still looking at Rose. "I didn't know her before she came into my life, obviously, but I know her now, and she does pretty well for herself."
"I..." Rose tried.
"We all hurt in our own way, Rose," Lee stated firmly. "It doesn't make one or the other right or wrong." He released the bag he was holding when Norah tugged on it, and Rose stood there feeling even worse for her tirade.
"I'm sorry," she said.
"Muffin?" Norah asked, holding one up. Rose just blinked, but she managed to catch it when Norah tossed it at her.
"Thanks..."
"Remember what I told you a few months ago?" Norah prompted, looking at her. "That you didn't need to take care of me anymore?"
"Yes."
"That still applies today," Norah confirmed. "But thank you. I appreciate that you care enough to tell me to smarten up cos you thought I needed to."
Rose swallowed, fidgeting with the muffin in her hands and making crumbs hit the floor. She was feeling unnerved by Lee's continued gaze.
"Right. Well, okay," she said, nodding. "Sorry again." She turned and walked out, making it to the kitchen and leaning her hands on the edge of the counter after setting the muffin on it. Now she felt like an idiot.
"Lee brought us breakfast," Oscar said happily, making her look to see him inhaling a chocolate chip muffin. An opened bottle of orange juice was in front of him.
"I see that," she replied. Her phone rang, and she saw it was the hospital, so she answered quickly. "Hello?"
She listened as the person on the other end told her they were taking her father to have his stent put in. She looked at the clock. They were a couple of hours early.
"He'll be alright?" she asked. They said most likely. This didn't help her feel better, so she hung up and called for Norah to get up because they had to go. She was grateful her sister hadn't gone all dramatic on her and made things worse. She really was growing up.
Barney
He'd tossed and turned for hours. Tool had called to tell him about the latest event with Caesar. He felt bad for being far away and unable to assist. He also felt bad that his brother-in-law was in the hospital. He sat up and answered his phone when Lee called.
"How is he?" he asked.
"Having a stent put in as we speak," Lee answered.
"So he's okay?"
"I guess so. I'm not really sure."
"Alright," Barney sighed, stretching his back until it popped.
"I got Toll's text," Lee said.
"You think it's your guy?"
"I don't know anymore."
"Might be time to fill the rest of them in on what's going on," Barney suggested.
"I know. I will when we get back."
"Will that be soon?"
"Yea," Lee answered. "If Joe is good later today, we can go."
"Send me a text."
"Will do."
They hung up, and Barney closed his eyes briefly. He was staying away because he knew Joe seeing him would probably give him another heart attack. If Norah had told her father she'd met him, that was probably part of the reason he was in there to start with. Barney didn't blame him.
He'd want to keep his child safe from a black hearted mercenary too.