Disclaimer:
Mr. M, Mrs. J.K., Fellow Fanfic Authors… you may claim it is all yours, I just type it down, for free of course.
Previous:
We stopped at several small cities to set trade posts up. When Yin came in sight, even I was impressed. It is time to find a princess.
14 Eeny, meeny, miny moe, witch Princess has to go?
The sight of a metal ship entering the harbor without sails or oars halted all activity. The officials were expecting us, we did several ports on the way here, they must have a way to communicate too.
By absorbing Skill Books in their language I mastered the language pretty easily, teaching it to my wives was done in an instant, the kids got it after a few weeks at sea.
Several merchants were ready to sell their warehouse to us, the gold, magic armor, and weapon they got for it was double the value. We got a good spot at a dock with a big square in front of it for loading and offloading the wares. Big enough to erect our tent.
Going for effect, our five dragons flew in with a big roar, Margaery, Justin, Sybil, and Jorelle were riding them. We have yet to find a way to get a saddle on Betsy, she has way too many spikes on her spine.
They landed in front of the tent and walked inside. All this was witnessed by many thousands. The merchant that sold us his warehouse asked: "Are these dragons for sale?" Betsy must have heard it through our link, she stuck her head out of the tent and roared angrily in the merchant's face.
I answered: "Don't ask it again good man. Betsy is touchy about these things. No, they can't be sold. We are linked to our souls, what we know they know, and reversed. Don't ask, it is magic."
A heavily armored group came to us with their weapons raised, the leader approached us and said: "Where are the beasts? We have orders to capture or kill them."
I tilted my head: "I doubt you will survive it Ser, before you reach mine and my wives dragons, you have to pass by me. Go back to your superiors and tell them those dragons will harm no one if you left them and us alone." I raised my hand and conjured a big fireball: "We come in peace to trade and have fun, but we won't allow someone to harm our dragons."
Arrogantly he asked: "Can a simple stranger with some magic stand against Imperial Troops?"
I shrugged: "You asked for it." Maxing out Transfiguration has some nice perks, like Mass Transfiguration. I pointed to his warriors and asked: "What do you think? Would there be enough for a snack?" While changing them all into bunnies.
I said to the officer: "I will change them back, go report to your superiors, and explain that I don't want to cause problems, but will not run away from them." With a wave of my hand, they turned back into humans. Speechless they left.
The merchant commented: "Those were the Imperial guards, I doubt they will be happy. They have been undefeated for centuries."
I smiled at him: "There must be a first for everything and a last. My good man, you have the gold and armor in the ring we gave you, maybe it is best you distance yourself from me. We can defend ourselves from people like him, I doubt you can." The merchant nodded and left in a hurry.
I turned to the harbor official and asked: "The warehouse and this square are officially mine now, correct?"
Reluctantly he nodded: "They are Lord Greengrass, but I would have preferred you did not pick a fight with the Imperial Guards."
I shrugged: "Not my fault my man, they came to kill my dragons. They got off easy." I activated the wards of the tent and started to set a ward cluster up for the warehouse and square.
An hour later the officer was back with his superiors: "Lord Greengrass, you have attacked the Imperial guards by changing them into rabbits and prevented them to obey an Imperial order. We are here to lead you before our God-Emperor to explain your actions."
Oh? God-Emperor? I answered: "No problem, let me change into something more appropriate, these garbs are hardly good enough to trade in, not to appear in front of a God with. Please come along inside, I will guarantee your safety here until we leave."
They had to pick their jaws from the floor when they saw the inside of the tent, the stairway to the next floor was the eye-catcher in the hallway, the sandpit with five dragons in it getting a brush-down from teenagers and kids completed the picture.
I called the wives: "Tyene, Lucinda? Dress to impress honey's, we are summoned to the Emperor. Margaery, Justin, Sybil, and Jorelle, you four are responsible for the children's safety. The wards are up. You can write a letter to Astoria if you get bored."
We left B&B behind and stored the others in our Familiar Storage. We winked at the kids and followed the officials.
Xxxxx
it was quite the distance, a horse for me and a carriage for the wives was provided. The palace was enormous, we passed hall after hall, when we reached the main palace, they led us inside.
Of course, an Emperor won't wait for us, that is a big no-no in the Imperial manuals. We must at least wait a half hour. The time after that determent your importance, if you have to wait until tomorrow then you are doomed.
We are very important, thirty-five minutes later we were shown inside. I bet Mr. Martin read too many Xantia and Wuxia novels, this dude was acting like he was the real thing.
I never knew the difference between Xantia and Wuxia novels, they are all about the same thing: you start with nothing, or with a handicap, find a treasure, and kill your way up until the writer doesn't get money anymore to write new chapters, if it is a good writer he ends up with a big harem. Don't look like that! I like harem stories.
Where was I… ah, God-Emperor, we stopped at the stairs leading up to his throne, another power play,
The gestures of the officials to bow and grovel before their God was ignored, patiently we waited for him to speak. After all, we are looking for a Princess, so he is Daddy, Gramps, or Uncle soon.
He observed us long enough and said: "We ordered the capture or death of those Dragons that flew to our city. You prevented Our order, that is a capital offense, what do you have to say for yourselves before we pass judgment?"
Hmm, better start friendly: "Well, your eminence, if those were wild dragons, your response was fast and accurate and your orders clear for everyone. Your order was to protect your people from harm with swift action.
These dragons however are bonded to us and are harmless when not provoked. Your intelligence officers must have failed to notice four of the five dragons were mounted by our wards to show everyone they are under our control."
Bullshitting Maxed out +1 New Skill: Buttkissing 15
Come on! That was a perfectly good reasoning! I should have studied for a lawyer or something flashy like that!
The God-Emperor looked at me, I used plenty of butter, buttering him up. The blame was misinformation of his subjects, so he can let it go without losing face.
He said: "We gave an Order, We don't like it when someone prevents us to get Our Order executed. In this case, however, We will overlook this insult with the circumstances you presented here in Our court. We are curious, what is the reason for your visit to Our country?"
Hmm, I'll better say something pompous: "Your eminence, I am on a Quest from the Divine Being that granted me my magic. I must find a Fair Princess and take her home with me, to marry her within a year. We heard from almost everyone we asked, that the Land of Yi Ti has True Princesses, and the City of Yin is the home of the One God-Emperor. I thought here was the best place to start my Quest."
His eyes darkened: "You are here to demand Our daughters?"
I held my hands up: "God no! That would be too much honor. A distant relative with the title of Princess will do. I propose that some of your courts visit my Portable Palace to witness that I can provide a living equal to their standards. Any Princess that wants to see it for themselves are welcome, along with their retinue. I took the liberty to prepare a small gift for you to show you the artifacts we can create. If you point me a trusted aid so I can bind this ring with his blood, this way only he can have access to the treasures inside."
There is no way an Emperor is going to let a wizard cut him and take his blood. So he sacrificed an aid, a drop of blood on the ring, and the aid knew what was inside.
He said: "My Divine Lord! This ring is filled with treasures! Allow me to let the captain of the guards inspect these weapons."
To be honest, those are swords Lucinda trained her Blacksmithing with. They were nice and impressive with a lot of detail. The armors in the ring were the same, enough to equip an honor guard of a hundred men, with some better for the officers. Some items from Jewelcrafting for him and the spouses, and nic-nacs for the kids.
Xxxxx
They guided us back to the tent, we keep Teleport as an ace up our sleeves, once at the tent the officer asked: "Those weapons and armor are of top quality Lord Greengrass, are those the things you are trading?"
I shrugged: "To be honest, I don't know what we are trading, my wives are doing a good job at it. They trade to keep busy and provide for our future children. I focus on magic and inventing new items. Our metal ships are a small example."
When they left, I hugged my wives and said: "That must be the hardest thing you have to endure isn't it? Not allowing the wives to speak is a stupid custom. Now that we have the Emperor out of the way, you can go all out. Screw those customs, I want my wives to have their own voice and opinion."
Tyene: "Prepare for a rough night, my love. I had to stop myself several times from killing those morons."
That night, I locked the door, there was no reason to traumatize the kids.
Xxxxx
The next day, after contacting Astoria, I send her a two-way portkey, it was almost at maximum range, and had to send separate ones for every wife.
They ported in, one by one. They released their dragon from storage and jumped into my arms. We made time for a good shag, to release the pressure.
At lunchtime, the first visitors started coming in. Most were Ladies of the Court doing a preliminary survey, to see if it is worth the trouble. A tour in our 'Portable Castle' convinced them and they left in a hurry.
At dinner time, our hall was filled with princesses and their ladies in waiting. It was good that we had a lot of food in stasis, and the magic to distribute them.
The sight of eight dragons lazing in their sandpit was impressive, cocky Princesses were discouraged by Betsy, a hard stare from a Hungarian Horntail does it every time.
In the evening we lit the place up. The hall got a big disco ball, I know, but I could not help myself. I doubt they would appreciate a good headbanging Heavy Metal concert. So soft background music and a disco ball does the trick. The dumb princesses were hanging on my sides, the smart ones were mingling with the wives.
Too bad for them, we could read their minds, and the worst ones were filtered out. We entertained dozens of princesses for a week. Our dragons showed their preferences by scaring the bitches and allowing the good ones to touch them.
How do they know the good from the bad? The familiar link raises their intelligence and shares the emotions and thoughts of their rider. The dragons communicate by sharing their senses and emotions.
By entertaining the princesses we found out the politics and undercurrents of the court. And a Princess comes with a price tag.
Xxxxx
Let us try: Paying it forwards, I found out a new way of fast exploring, I rode Benny, he is the oldest and strongest of the Weyr. We flew way up in the sky, I concentrated on a spot at the horizon, stored Benny, and Teleported to that spot. We repeated the procedure, fly high, store, and Teleport. This way we traveled 1500 miles north to Trader Town smack in the middle of Essos. Why there you say? There is a general that opposes Daddy-future-in-law, a Pol Qo, claiming to be an Orange Emperor, he has his HQ in that town. Finding him and his officers was easy.
An Imperio later he was proclaiming himself a loyal subject to Emperor Bu Gai to his troops. When he was alone I smacked a portkey on his body and sent him gift-wrapped to the gates of the palace.
While I am at it, we traveled Three thousand miles South-East to the Hidden Sea to a city called Carcosa, to an exiled Sorcerer lord, this one claimed to be a Yellow emperor… What was Daddy-future-in-laws color again? Ah! Azure… I had to search through the modern library in my mind to find out it was Blue with a speck of Green in it… way better than Yellow and Orange… more dignified.
Hey! I can be the Green Emperor! I already have the color in my name! I just have to kill a few hundred thousand soldiers and the other Colored Emperors… Nah, too much work and maintenance.
We reached Carcosa in the evening, Benny was tired, so I checked in to an Inn, after feeding and storing Benny. You can't believe how many bugs can live on a bed. Next time I will bring my spare tent along… bloody fuck! I Teleported out and took my spare tent out of my Inventory. Benny was happy in his sandpit.
The next day, the Sorcerer and I met, he had some magic, again, sacrificial magic. Our mighty duel was a letdown, to be honest. In front of his subjects, he changed into different kinds of animals: a bunny, goat, a Daffy Duck, yep the cartoon one, complete with the speech disorder. It was funny to see him throw a tantrum.
An Imperio later, he declared himself to be loyal to the Azure Emperor and left with me to the capital.
Xxxxx
We arrived in my tent, no my 'Portable Palace', and showed my wives the Yellow Sorcerer. They were entertaining five princesses at the moment with their retinue.
Tyene sent a Patronus message to the commanding officer to collect the man. We handed him over after removing his magic powers and memory of it.
Maybe I overshot my goals. Capturing two enemies in two days, them being thousands of miles apart, it scared the shit out of Azure Daddy-in-law.
When the wives and I were summoned to him, we didn't have to wait for a minute. He was surrounded by a bunch of Princesses.
He said: "Lord Greengrass, You did Us a great favor by removing two enemies of Our Empire. Even letting them swear their loyalty to Us avoided a civil war.
We decided to reward you by fulfilling your quest for a princess. You may choose one of Our relatives here present."
Astoria answered: "The choice will be done by us, your majesty, as Lord Greengrass wives, it is our privilege to select a proper wive for our husband."
Obara: "We narrowed it down to two names: Bu Meili and Bu Fen. Both are present here."
Tyene: "We like them both equally, and want to ask them if they are willing to be married to our husband." Both girls stepped forwards and bowed, Meili, said: "We are sisters, and we are willing to be a sister wive to you."
Hah, Tyene is taking revenge by demanding two princesses instead of one. Lucinda confirmed my suspicion by asking the Emperor: "Your majesty, we can't choose between them, is it possible to grant them both to us? Our husband removed two great enemies from your Empire. It fits the achievement."
She looked at the other princesses as if telling him he has enough of them to spare one more.
To save face, daddy-in-law thought long and deep, finally, he said: "It is highly unusual, but in this case, We grant your requests. Both will join you tomorrow in your palace.
New Companions:
Bu Meili
Bu Fen
Crap! We are not even married! I need to remove some nasties first before I leave this place.
Xxxxx
Did you know a princess never travels alone? Right, each brought five Ladies in waiting and fifteen handmaidens to serve them. Their mothers came along to say goodbye and to meet the in-laws.
Personally, I think they just wanted some extra goodies. Tyene and Lucinda gave them each two storage rings filled with clothes they used to level Tailoring and some jewelry.
We stayed for a week to get everyone a chance to visit their relatives for the last time. It will take years to come back here… They think.
We stored everything, gave each an amulet, and activated their portkey. Astoria and Tyene were waiting to receive them at home.
We had to slap the heads of Margaery, Justin, Sybil, Berenda, and Jorelle because they wanted to travel home by ship. Obara laughed: "Get home you horny sods! Give those dolphins a rest." She whispered: "Dorne has dolphins too you know."
That eased the pain, smiling they activated their portkey. Nymeria said: "Those five are an item, we better start talks with their parents. Marrying them off to someone else will start a war. I doubt those husbands will survive the wedding night."
I nodded: "Justin is destined for Moat Cailin. The City forming around it is already growing, it will provide enough to support four wives. Olenna will be happy with it if we make Margaery the head wife. We will start teaching them magic, our kids need someone magical to marry with."
We expanded our home again with an extra wing for the Ladies in waiting and handmaidens. The two Bu's got a suite on our floor Lucinda and Tyene was guiding them with the new technology.
Astoria developed Translation Magic, for educating the captains in different languages. Soon the Yi Ti's were fluent in the Common tongue.
She was happy to finally be able to teach me for once.
New Skill: Translation Magic 20
Thank you, my love, I will reward you tonight. A lot. We settled in, hired new maids and cooks for the extra mouths to feed. Justin and I were the only males in a home filled with more than 60 females.
Count in the fact that Margaery, Sybil, Berena, and Jorelle have a jealous streak, only allowing their fellow wards to interact with Justin, the focus of their attention was me.
Meili and Fen explained that the Ladies in waiting were supposed to be their concubines. I looked at Tyene and Lucinde and said: "I Can't Choose? Let's Have them Both?"
Tyene defended herself with a grin: "I didn't hear you protesting that day."
I sighed: "I'll go after the Night King."
Xxxxx
An Other was easy to find and capture, my level reached 150 already, so there was not much that could stop me in Westeros.
We took the fast tour around the realm and did a show and tell with Mr. Frosty, telling them there were plenty more of them beyond the wall, with a demon controlling them.
It took a few months to organize an expedition, meanwhile, the wives were negotiating the marriage of Justin. Olenna agreed when we pointed out that being a Queen in Westeros is not a steady job, especially if the King is a delusional nutcase like Joffrey.
Flint, Glover, and the she-bears agreed in an instant. We made them very rich and safe. Getting a daughter in Moat Cailin, even as a co-wife will strengthen their position in the north.
The Tullies never fully recovered from my visit, only holding on to their position by his daughter's husbands.
Lady Stark hates me with a passion, I stole her daughters and destroyed the home she grew up in. She stopped writing to Sansa and Arya when they wrote they learned magic from me. A visit from Astoria corrected that. Getting told that The Mother loves All her Children equally, no matter the good or bad was humiliating to her.
In the end, Astoria rewrote her mindset, making her accept magic as something natural, oh… and she should fuck her husband a bit more. Lord Stark did not complain at all.
Xxxxx
My two Bu's and concubines got their eggs, getting Betsy and all the female dragons in hatching mode, they took turns brooding the eggs in the sandpit. Hatching eggs and practicing the animagus form was a bonding experience for everyone. Soon they were a happy harem, the concubines were glad to be counted as full wives with all the perks that come with it. To think I was planning to keep it with only Astoria.
That meant Dungeons too. The levels raised slowly, so were the Skills. When the dragons hatched I knew it was time.
Xxxxx
The Army entered through the gates of Castle Black, with the armor and weapons we provided, cold and zombies were not a problem anymore. At the Fist of the First Men, I introduced the Children of the Forest to the Nobles from Westeros and forced them to live together: "The Children will inhabit the forests, their influence on the land will make it more fertile. So a Win-Win. Any tree you chop down needs to be replaced with a healthy seedling, providing a steady inflow of wood.
If any Septon protests it means that he is not a real believer. The Seven are Gods of everyone, not just the Andals, we just gave them different names."
The Night King was no challenge at all. While the wives kept the Others busy, the Night king got chopped up in little pieces by me.
Of course, I let the Nobles get a shot at him first, Robert was sober when he went to the Night King with his hammer. It is a bit ironic that he died sober, Tywin with Brightroar did his best, his best was not good enough though. He died valiantly. So did Mace Tyrell and strangely enough Renly Baratheon too. Well, what are the odds to that?
Edmund Tully fell from his horse and broke his neck, not a big loss when you expected Heirs from him, he was a frequent visitor of Renly's tent… to discuss strategy of course.
I guess Bran is the next in line, Bethany and Barbara will do nicely for him. Little Joff was a pureblood Lion, but Tommen has Black hair and blue eyes. Didn't Little Shit… Joff looks a bit sick when I left Kings Landing? I hope he survives, I think he caught it over from his mother.
What was I doing,...Ah, chopping the Night King. Did I forget someone? Oh yes! The Jousting Bear, Jorah Mormont, the poor sod lost his depth perception, two tournaments later he tragically fell from his horse.
Dacey Mormont with her newborn son took the Lordship. Strange, the kid looked just like me. My wives were doting on him like it was one of their own kids. We did visit them a lot over the years after all.
I finally caved in and lifted the anti-conception ward, soon there were a lot of pregnant wives and concubines in my home. Justin, Margaery, Berena, Sybil, and Jorelle were abusing the local dolphin population to release their frustrations.
Hmm? We won? Ah, yes I killed the Night King, time flies fast if you have a lot on your mind. Maybe I introduce Wynafryd to Rob Stark the boy needs a strong hand and a sharp mind, no the North Needs Her Sharp Mind. Too bad the boy is not old enough to rule, having that harpy as a Regent would cause disaster.
Xxxxx
I let the army return on their own, it will be a bonding trip for them. At home the wives gathered in the Hal, I said: "It is time to marry my princesses!" We prepared everything, my Inventory got cleaned out, it was time the game left this world.
That night Astoria performed the marriage vows and I married two Bu's. The next morning the Game let itself known:
Level 6 Completed
Main Quest: Survive the wars, Become a Noble, Marry a princesses
Time Bonus 8 Years
Bonus objectives:
Save the royal children: 5
Marry more than one Princess: 2
Create a Harem of more than 10 women: 17
Kill a King 1
Reward: 1 free ability
Move to the next level Y / N?
The rewards are getting crappier with each level! Free ability they say, but it is a shitty list to choose from. Finally, I chose Skill Creator, the name sounded cool enough. It was crappy though, I could create a Skill book and give it to someone. The bad part: it always starts at level 1. I can fucking do the same when I add them to my Party. That game didn't let me read the description at all.
I kissed everyone goodbye and pressed Y
Xxxxx
I found myself in a square in Kings Landing while I shouted: "Of with his head!"