Wonder Woman 12
The Battle of Bullfinch
The Bullfinch Department Store, of which there were many, was considered an institution by quite a few. With stores stretching across the country, holiday parades, and a few thousand employees, the Bullfinch family may not have been American royalty, but they were darn close.
Gloria Bullfinch was the heir apparent and president in all but name. To the public she was a princess, cutting ribbons at new stores and smiling for the cameras. To her employees she was little more than some ancient god. A shadowy figure rarely glimpsed and spoken of in half whispers, if spoken of at all. Mr. Googins, on the other hand, was more direct.
He was the manager of the main anchor store of the line in New York City. A pinched faced figure, he was the type who was nothing but smiles and cream to Ms. Bullfinch, but screams and venom to anyone below him, and quite a few people were below him. He was the type of manager who would personally check everyone's time card before leaving. Unannounced inspections of employee lockers was a favorite pastime of his, and anything not up to his standards would be destroyed on site. Also, he viewed talking as theft from the company, to give a better idea of the man.
They both factor into this story in a large way, but how they came to encounter the Amazing Amazon started in a small way…
Tina Toy, of the Toy Family Toys, was enjoying the summer break off from Holiday College. As a favor to her parents she would sometimes step into a random department or toy store and see how their particular toys were selling against their rivals.
Tina made her way past the bustling crowds and walked into the Bullfinch Toy Department. The sign overhead was brightly painted, with a toy solider on one side and a teddy bear on the other. Children, parents often being dragged behind them, rushed towards the latest playthings.
Tina noticed with some pride that the Wonder Woman dolls were almost gone. "Convincing her highness to sell those toys was brilliant!" Tina was busy with her own thoughts that she failed to see the shop clerk before she crashed into her. "Oh, I'm sorry!"
The woman, her checks sunken in and her eyes heavy, didn't say anything. She hurried to her feet and slinked as Mr. Googins stormed over. "I'm terribly sorry miss! Did that fool of a girl hurt you?"
"No, no, the fault was mine!" Tina protested. The clerk, now two aisles over, looked like she was trying to merge with the walls. "There's no need to make a fuss!"
This seemed to satisfy the man who exited the same way he entered. Once she was sure he was gone, Tina approached the now quavering clerk. "Are you alright?"
"Oh, yes please ma'am, don't mind me at all!" Her voice was fast, almost manic. "We here at Bullfinch pride ourselves on being the best!" She clamped her hands over Tina's. "Yes, the best in the best shop in the world!" She limped away. Tina noticed how swollen her ankles looked.
In her hand was a small slip of paper. On it was a crude word in pencil: 'HELP'
"So, that's that." The slip of paper was before Etta Candy and a small group of Holliday Girls.
"Hmm, this whole thing stinks. Why the cloak and dagger bit?"
"I'm not sure." Tina shared her friend's concern. "Maybe we should put in a call?"
Etta grinned. "Toy, I like the way you think!"
"So, you summoned me over this?" Wonder Woman, Queen of the Amazons, stood in the sorority house's common room in full battle regalia. She held the paper in one hand.
"Pretty much." Etta popped a bon-bon in her mouth. "Look, this whole business may be a load of hot air, but what if that gal's in trouble?"
Wonder Woman saw the point. With a brief twirl she stood garbed in the simple garb of a Holliday Girl. "Lead on."
Googins wiped his brow. The basement of the store was always muggy, what with the furnace going almost full blast. "Why must we always meet here?"
"Because signore, no one is watching the back door, eh?" The gentleman standing before Googins barely deserved the title. Guigi Del Slimo, although he answered to other names, removed his thin black mask and replaced it with a monocle. "Dear Ms. Bullfinch is, how you Americans say, heels over head with me?"
"That's head over heels!" Googins wiped his brow again, turning his handkerchief into a sodden mess. "How is it going?"
"Very well, I'm taking her out to dinner tonight, and if I'm lucky more than that. And you?"
"The gang is ready and I managed to procure the dynamite. Tomorrow night this whole blasted store will be rubble!"
"You know angel, when you said you wanted dinner and dancing, I expected something less formal." Steve groused as he leaned in closer to Wonder Woman.
"To be fair Steve, I did say this was a mission the entire time, didn't I?"
The ballroom was packed with the upper crust of society. In a corner booth away from the main attention of the dance sat Gloria Bullfinch and, unknown to Wonder Woman, Guigi.
Dancing closer to their table, Wonder Woman listened to the lover's conversation. "I tell you, that store is driving me crazy. All day long those worthless girls complain and whine!"
"Indeed darling! Why, if anything they should be paying you!" Guigi purred. "As it stands they're practically robbing you blind!"
Wonder Woman stepped away from Steve and marched over to the table. "You're Gloria Bullfinch?"
Glora, despite sitting down, managed to look down her nose at the new arrival. "Yes? Are you the new waitress? I had to fire the old one."
Wonder Woman reigned in her urge to snap the table in two, but she did leave a few indentations in the wood with her fingers. "Why do you work those girls so hard? I've seen slaves treated better!" The crowd around them grew quiet.
In her man's world disguise, Wonder Woman had walked the floor of the Bullfinch store. Girls cowed before management, forced to stand for ten hours at a time, and she saw no evidence of the staff eating.
"Who do you think you are talking to?" Guigi snarled. His hand dropped to his pocket and a far too familiar bulge.
"A cruel taskmaster and a lout?" Wonder Woman folded her arms as the staff approached them.
"Angel, I think we're being asked to leave…" Steve whispered in her ear.
Gloria smirked as the pair of them were escorted out. Guigi followed close behind. Shoving the security aside, Guigi drew his gun and thrust it into Steve's face. "Who do think you are you pig, to insult me and my woman like that? You think you can get away with such a thing?"
"I was the one who did all the talking." Wonder Woman snatched the gun from Guigi's hand and bent the barrel.
Guigi let out a string of profanity and drew another gun. He got off one shot, but Wonder Woman simply blocked it with her bracelets. Guigi gagged in horror as her identity dawned on him. Cursing swiftly and loudly in Italian, he dashed into a passing car.
"Sorry Angel, but Guigi's too important to let go!" Steve shouted as he ran after the car and hopped onto the running board. "Thanks for the dancing!" he shouted as the car roared down the street and into the night.
Gloria entered her apartment alone. She turned on the light and screamed at the red and blue clad figure sitting on her sofa. "Who do you think you are?"
"My name is Wonder Woman Gloria. I was hoping we could talk."
"I'll talk alright, I'll talk to my lawyers when I see you arrested!" Gloria picked up the phone's receiver, but a quick jerk from the Amazon's hand uncoiled her golden lasso. Another and the golden thread had ensnared Gloria.
"Put down the phone." Wonder Woman's voice was firm but kind. "Now, why are you seeing that man?"
Gloria struggled for a bit before breaking down under the lasso's power. "Because he loves me! Because he's like no one else, because he tells me what I need and need to hear!"
Wonder Woman loosened the lasso. Gloria wiped the building tears from her eyes. "What was that?"
"The truth and nothing else." Wonder Woman rose from the couch and opened the door. "Your employees are not lying. If you valued their work, you should see how they live." She left, closing the door behind her.
No one had seen Steve Trevor since that night. Twenty-four hours, Wonder Woman was out of ideas. Wonder Woman planned out many strategies and called upon various gods for guidance. In the end, she simply strolled up to Guigi disguised as Polly Prince. "Hello, I know what you're planning!" Polly gave a broad smile before sucker punching him in the gut.
Wonder Woman felt a pair of rough hands clamp down on her shoulders. "If I'm lucky I'll get taken right to Steve!" A heavy bag was dropped over her head and she flet herself being bodily picked up and dropped into a trunk.
A few hours later, the trunk was opened. Steve Trevor sat tied to a chair in a damp wallpapered room. Guigi leaned on a nearby desk. "So, you know what I plan, eh?"
Wonder Woman stood up, still disguised as a student. "I know, or at least I have a good idea." She offered no resistance as Gugi slipped ropes over her wrists and bound her to a chair.
Guigi shrugged. "Eh, good enough, but I need mister army hero over there to understand a few points of order." Guigi drew himself up to his full height and started to explain. "In the event you didn't figure it out, I'm a spy."
"I knew it!" Trevor beamed.
"Don't get so sure of yourself. My masters in Italy want me to disrupt an American institution, and what's more American than a department store?"
"Gloria Bullfinch too? Where does she fit in?" Wonder Woman spat.
Guigi shrugged his shoulders. "if she dies, she dies. I admit, getting engaged to her was a surprise, but her money is more useful than she is. Within a few hours we'll hit the store and Gloria will die tragically in my arms. The press will love that story." He smiled and placed a straw boater on his head before leaving the room. Before he left, Gugi turned to the two bound heroes. "I wouldn't worry about those restraints." Guigi pointed to a small briefcase on the desk. "In five minutes that bomb will take care of you and your friend. Good bye."
The door closed. Once his footsteps faded away, Wonder Woman stood up, the ropes falling into a heap. "Angel? You could have escaped at any time?"
"A man binding me does rob me of my strength, but those knots? You think an Amazon wouldn't know how to escape something so simple?"
She dashed over to the bomb. "Three minutes left!" Glancing around the room revealed little in ways of hiding. Kicking down the door, she ran into the hall. She sprinted down the stairs and into the street. "The bay!"
Ignoring the few vagrants that congregated around that area, she pitched the still ticking bomb into the dark murky waters. The resulting explosion sent up a great plume of water, drenching most of the area and rattled what few windows hadn't been broken.
Heading back to the apartment, she untied Steve. "So, what's the game plan angel?"
Wonder Woman idly poked the rope. "Such terrible craftsmanship." Turning back to Steve, she pointed to the bay.
"No doubt the word will spread about the explosion. Del Slimo might think we're dead. That gives us a few hours at best."
"I can get on the radio and have Uncle Sam's finest waiting for Mr. Del Slimo."
"And I'll have Mr. Googins tied up." She didn't offer any more details and Steve had learned not to ask.
The next day, there was a crowd as usual in front of Bullfinch's, but the difference today was the picket signs and police. Googins was shouting into a bullhorn. "The police have been notified! Anyone trying to disrupt the running of this store will be fired and prosecuted!"
Gloria Bullfinch looked down from a window. A day earlier she wouldn't have given the crowds a second thought, but after her conversation with Wonder Woman, she found herself taking a long hard look at the man she thought she loved.
"He's so cruel. We have so much money, but those girls work like dogs." She stepped away from the window, unaware of the small bundle Googins left by her desk. In fact, similar bundles were hidden all over the store.
Del Slimo pushed his way through the crowd and waved to Googins. He nodded and tossed the bullhorn to a hapless drone and walked quickly back into the store. Once Del Slimo was close enough to whisper, Googins asked. "Did you take care of that spy?"
"Him and his lady friend!" Del Slimo beamed. "I heard on the radio about an explosion."
Googins frowned. "I heard that too, but they said there was an explosion in the bay…did you make sure they were dead?"
Del Slimo paled. "I…I thought so?"
Both men were shocked when the large display window behind them shattered. Walking casually into the ruined display, Wonder Woman pointed at the two men. "You!"
Both men ran in different directions. Googins took the elevator up, while Del Slimo darted towards the fire door. He never made it, as the gold lasso wrapped around his body. With a tug he was yanked back towards the Amazon. "Talk!"
"Bombs! Bombs all over the store!" Del Slimo wheezed. "Please, they can go off any second!" She released him from the bonds and dropped him to the floor. He tried to crawl away, but her hands tore a large floor lamp free and wrapped it around him.
Seeing Googins rushing towards the main office, Wonder Woman leapped and hit the landing running. She barreled into the office as Googins thrust Gloria between them, a gun to her temple. "Stay away!" He shrieked.
"There's nowhere to run Googins, surrender." Her voice was firm.
"That blasted spy! He was supposed to distract the both of you! With you dead I'd be next in line to take over the store, me!" Googins rambled. Gloria locked eyes with Wonder Woman for a second.
Gloria slammed her elbow into Googins' stomach. His gun went off, missing her head by an inch. Wonder Woman easily blocked it with her bracelets. Gloria stepped out of the way as Wonder Woman easily disarmed him with a slap, driving him to his knees a sobbing wreck.
"No point, the bombs, the bombs will go off in less than a minute!" Googins wailed.
Wonder Woman saw the bundle by the desk. "I saw other bundles all over the store, there's no time to lose!"
Leaving Gloria to keep an eye on the weeping former manager with his own gun, she rushed through the store. Calling on the speed of Hermes and her mother the wind, she raced through the store, Del Slimo in tow as he pointed out where he hid the bombs.
Once all of them were gathered, she packed them tightly into a large trashcan. "The timers can't be disabled!" Del Slimo cackled. "You've lost!" Wonder Woman rushed into a nearby alley.
She threw the can down, compacting as tight as she could. Throwing herself over the can, she braced as the seconds ticked by. The explosion was blinding and was enough to throw her back into the street.
Her armor was singed and her hair smoking. She ached, but lived. She limped slightly towards the astonished crowd. "You're wrong." She coughed as the two now speechless men were hauled off by the police.
"Girls, I want you to know that the past few days have really changed my life." Gloria was sitting down on the shop floor before opening. "And I promise, things will change."
Wonder Woman, watching near the exit door, saw the salesgirls cheer. Gloria continued. "Actual breaks and proper money, I promise."
Wonder Woman stepped out into the streets. Steve was waiting by the curb with a waiting taxi. "Sounds like you did some good."
"Gloria simply chose to follow the Amazon way, ruling with love instead of hate."
The two fell into silence as the taxi drove off into the morning traffic.
The end
Next time, "The Return of Diana Prince!"
Based on "Department Store Perfidy" which was first published in Sensation Comics I#8 (August 1942) with credits to William Moulton Marston (script), Harry G. Peter (pencils/inks).
Sensational Mail
From Darci
Lots of changes from the original in this episode. Strangely they lead to Major Trevor playing a much larger part than he did in the original. Other than that, once again this version is an improvement over the original. One of the strangest parts of both stories is there's nothing illegal about what International Milk did. I wonder how Nazi Germany was smuggling $6 million to Paula to bankroll this scheme?
…You know, that's a very good question. Thanks for all the comments and help!
Be on the lookout for the following:
Detective Comics#11-The Bat VS the Spies!
Action Comics#11-The Black Gold Oil Well