Sensation Comics 17
"America's Guardian Angel!"
"Why am I doing this again?"
Steve Trevor and Hippolyta, Queen of the Amazons, both thought the same thing as the queen brought her invisible plane down in the Hollywood hills. For Steve, it was work. There had been some chatter about a spy ring working out of the poverty row studios in Hollywood. Naturally he had been picked to handle this assignment in any way he could, so he put in a call.
Queen Hippolyta had accompanied him, both as muscle and as bait. "After all, a beautiful woman might open doors that I can't." Steve replied. She was also curious about 'motion pictures' that everyone seemed to be talking about.
Unknown to both of them, Paula Van Gunther was aware of their whereabouts and their mission. She was the reason after all. Despite her being moved to another prison and under heavier guard, she still had her ways of contacting her agents.
It had taken some time, but she had moved her pieces of the board into place. She had hoped her agents won, but even if they didn't she would still keep the Allies best agents busy so she was considering the whole thing a win.
Steve and Polly, as she was called when in Man's World, arrived at the Los Angeles Union Passenger Terminal. "Are you sure we need them?" Steve glanced around the platform as four women emerged from the train.
"Polly!" Etta Candy shouted as she darted across the platform and embraced the queen in a hug that would put most pro wrestlers to shame.
Behind her were Thelma Tall, the lanky Holiday Girl towering over the two gals behind her. Millie and Tillie Heyday were bringing up the rear. Polly didn't know them that well, but Etta swore by them. "Triplets, but only Millie and Tillie are in school this semester. Tillie's the levelheaded one, Millie is a real wildcat!" Etta explained earlier.
"Girls" Steve nodded as the four gathered.
"Oh, this is so exciting!" Millie gazed around the platform like she was staring at the sun. "Where are we going first?"
"This isn't a holiday, Millie." Tillie groused. "We're helping a fellow Holiday Girl with a mission of the utmost importance."
"Miss Heyday is right." Polly nodded. "We'll check in with the hotel, then split up into teams. We have to check out Fortune Films."
"Thanks angel." Steve helped load the luggage into the cab. "Remember girls, we're here for work."
He ignored the four sets of pouting faces as they went to the hotel. The check in was easy, whereas dealing with four college students was not. Etta made herself at home and started popping chocolates; Millie, Tillie, and Thelma all started clamoring about which Hollywood star they would surely meet first.
"Hold it!' Steve held up his hand. "Right now is not the time for sightseeing. Right now we're going to study."
"Study what?" One of the twins asked.
"First thing tomorrow we're all heading over to Fortune Films for work. We're hunting spies, so no names. Your new identities are all in these packets."
"Aw!" Etta pouted. "I take it we're not going to be movie stars?"
"Not this time. No, tomorrow we're all going to working various jobs on the lot. Behind the scenes stuff so we can observe what's going on and who the spies are."
Paula Von Gunther was the spy leader. Officially of course she was locked away in a secret government prison with what little human contact monitored closely. Unofficially she had no problem directing her agents. The shape of garbage thrown out, the length of a cigarette smoked, all utterly meaningless to a casual observer but to her agents as obvious as a lit billboard.
Yvette, one of the baroness's top agents, was heading her West Coast branch. The films she was working were loaded with special codes, but nothing that a layman would understand. The placement of a coffee cup in the first reel of "Danger Wears a Dress", for example, would tell agents in San Francisco the time of a drop off, whereas the length of the heroine's skirt in the finale of "Jungle Jitters" would inform agents in Los Angles of their time schedule.
Paula allowed herself a small smile. "And the best thing is, no one knows!" After all, they would be looking for obvious signs, subliminal messages or something equally obvious. All she had to do was wait.
LeRoy Fontaine was a nervous man. He was chiefly a producer, but when the situation called for it, he could also direct, write, and even act if he had to; mostly because he saved on hiring if he did all the work himself. No, today he was nervous as he had just hired a new group. His secretary was going over the photos.
"Identical twins? Bah, passe! If they had two more sisters we might be able to do something!"
"Sir, they inquired about the front gate position?" Yvette politely reminded him.
"Ah, yes, hire them then. What about the others?"
"Well, this tall one is perfect for the grip, the fat one is good for deliveries, but what about these two?" She held up the photos of a smiling blond man and a dark-haired beauty.
Fontaine almost chocked on his tonic water. He snatched the photo of the woman and held it up. "Perfect! Sensational! Quick, run over to legal and draw up a contract, then hoof it over to the scriptwriters. We have to get this chick in something fast before she gets noticed!"
"What about the man?"
"Eh, handsome blondes I got. Maybe stick him in one of the jungle stories if our jungle lord's been into the cups again."
"But they're halfway through shooting!"
"And all he has to fill out a loincloth. If he can do, run him over to set B. Now chop-chop!"
The next few days were a blur. The group found themselves dragged into the world of showbiz. Thelma got to stand for endless hours holding a microphone, Etta proved to be an apt truck driver. Wonder Woman got the lavish treatment. She proved rather photogenic thus she spent hours getting tested.
Back at their hotel, the queen of the Amazons was about to pull her hair out. "Bah, all this endless waiting! They must have taken a thousand pictures! Even when I posed for statues I never stood that long!"
"Welcome to Hollywood angel." Steve leaned back on the couch; ice bags laid over all his joints. "Tomorrow they're having me wrestle with a gorilla."
"I think I found something." Thelma, with a similar amount of ice bags over her arms, spoke up. "You know Ben Black, the director?"
"Yeah, the comeback kid?" Steve looked at Wonder Woman's puzzled face. "Years ago, Black was a bigwig, working on everything for all the big studios. He got into some trouble, now he's trying to get back into the big leagues by working on smaller stuff for smaller studios. Epics for pennies, he calls it."
Thelma tried to steer the conversation back. "Anyway, I saw Mr. Black spending a lot of time with Yvette, Mr. Fontaine's assistant."
"So?"
"I mean like a lot of time."
"A pretty girl making time with someone they work with isn't exactly a crime, or at least not treason."
Thelma's resolve started to falter. "I guess, but before they went into his trailer, she seemed to obsess over just cheap minor stuff and when she left, she made sure to move everything around."
"What do you mean move?" Wonder Woman leaned forward.
"Well, I mean the first time she made sure there were four coffee cups on the table, but before she left she took one. She also made sure to rearrange some of the smaller props and poured out some water from the pitchers."
"Huh. Ok, weird. Millie, Tillie, could you keep an eye on our Mister Black?"
The next day, Wonder Woman found herself facing her most difficult challenge yet-wardrobe. The film she found her cast in was some kind of epic. She assumed, her costume being a garish silk and cotton thing with sequined stars and stripes over every contour. "You expect me to wear that?"
"Of course," Black grinned. "Don't worry about the color. The pink, purple, and green will look perfect in black and white."
She said nothing but left to the common trailer serving the entire staff. She slipped the costume on, barely. "Merciful Minerva, do they expect me to stand still the entire time?" She felt the seams protesting at her every movement. "I suppose if I hold my breath I might yet save the zipper."
She went back to the soundstage, which had been decorated to look like a crude lab in a castle, judging from the fake stone walls. "What's my scene?"
"Ah, you're going to love this. America's Guardian Angel has been captured by the evil Dr. Frankenstein and you're helpless!"
"But shouldn't we have a script?"
Black waved his hand at the rest of the set. "Still being written. That's why we're doing the money shots first. We'll do the slow taky stuff this afternoon."
"Very well." Wonder Woman went over to the slab and leaned against it. "What now?"
"Well, now our heroine gets captured." Twin hands reached from behind and clamped down on her wrists. The unmistakable sound of cuffs clicking was almost deafening. Black smiled. "Smile when you're on camera honey."
Wonder Woman felt her strength flee as two burly stagehands stepped out from behind and went past the cameras. "How?"
"Oh, a good director likes to know everything about his cast…Wonder Woman." He snapped his fingers as the cameraman started rolling. "Yeah, you've been a thorn in a lot of people's sides. Time to draw down your curtain."
"Who are you working for?"
"What, you think you're on a Republic picture? I'm not telling you anything." He stood up and marched over to the stage. On the table across from her were an array of items she had a sinking feeling were real. "Keep rolling boys, this one's going to the special reel."
He picked up a large knife and held it overhead. The door to the soundstage suddenly opened, setting off a siren. "Who the blazes opened that door? This is a closed set!"
"Sorry!" Tillie muttered as she dropped bags of food and some containers of coffee.
"What do you mean, sorry? You just blew the most important part of my picture!"
"And I said sorry, but the craft table sent me to deliver lunch."
The rest of the crew started to dig into the food. Black grew angrier. "What do you think you're doing?"
"Lunch break, mandatory thirty minutes for every six hours. Union rules."
"Gah!" Black stabbed the table, sticking the knife in the cheap balsa wood. "Fine!"
Meanwhile, Millie and Etta were busy inside the main office. "What are we looking for?"
"Not sure. It's not like they'd keep a big file folder marked 'spy stuff', would they?"
The door flung open. "What are you two doing?" Yvette glared at them.
"I was looking for…" Millie snatched a nearby logbook. "This! Found it!"
"And I was helping her!' Etta nodded and followed her to the door.
"Wait…" Yvette drew a pistol from her handbag. "I know you, the fat one!"
"Hey!" Etta protested.
"And you, get back here." Yvette slammed the door. "Now, we're going to have a long talk. I promise you won't like it."
Just then, the door swung wide, the doorknob slamming into her elbow. Thelma stood in the doorway, confused as Etta and Millie jumped on the confused Yvette. "Did I miss something?"
Back on the soundstage, Wonder Woman lay helpless. Tillie, noticing Black pacing back and forth, inched closer. She put herself between Black and the Amazon. "Sir, is there anything else you need?"
"Yes, I need a crew that actually works!" Black seethed. As he ranted and raved, Millie and Etta entered the soundstage. Etta stood in front with Millie slipping away in the crowd as Black turned his fury towards her. "Doesn't anyone in this town read? Closed set!"
Millie sprinted to Wonder Woman and untied her. Black stopped his screaming long enough to notice her. "What do you think you're doing?"
Wonder Woman stepped off the table. She cracked her knuckles. Black paled but drew a small pistol from his pocket. He grabbed Millie and pressed it against her temple. "Ok, no one panic, but I'm leaving! Just clear the path and this gal can live."
Wonder Woman calmly reached up and removed the tiara from her head. She had left her lasso back at the hotel, as it might have raised too many questions. Black backed towards the door as the crew moved away.
Wonder Woman carefully took aim. "What, you goin' smack me with costume jewelry?" Black sniggered.
Wonder Woman let the tiara fly. It sailed through the air and nailed Black perfectly between his eyes. He dropped like a stone as studio security rushed him.
Back at the hotel, Steve recapped their adventure to Col. Phillips. "Yes sir, Black gave up Yvette, the spy ring, the whole thing. No, I'm sure they were just pawns but they're closing ranks. We may not get anything else out of them, but we broke the ring up here."
He glanced at Wonder Woman, who was busy regaling the girls with stories of the various plays she saw back in Ancient Greece. "Yes sir, I'll pass my congratulations on to her as well, thank you sir."
Von Gunther leaned back on her cot. She fished a broken, crooked cigarette from her stash and lit it with a still smoldering one. She had no access to newspapers, but word reached her. She was annoyed, but there were still other rings at work. "There will be other games my dear, other games."
Based on "America's Guardian Angel" which was first published in Sensation Comics I#12(December 1942) with credits to William Marston (script) and Harry Peter (inks and pencils)
Next issue, Wonder Woman is Dead!
Upcoming tales
Detective Comics#16-Case of the Cat!
Action Comics#16-Superwoman Meets the Ultra-Humanite!
All-American Comics#4-The Insurance Racket!
