No good deed goes unpunished
Saturday mornings were sacred for Lorelai Gilmore. It was the pre-rest day, a day to relax and prepare to enjoy Sunday properly. She invented the concept in a spur of the moment for Rory a long time ago, but, since then, Lorelai was determined to live by it. Therefore the woman was not ashamed to welcome a cold weekend in later January comfortably asleep on her bed.
Luke had left the house at the crack of dawn to open the diner, as usual. So, everything was quiet. It was the perfect environment for the early morning sleep stage when the brain alternates between half awake moments and completely unconscious periods. Lorelai was totally digging this current state of torpor. At least, until something started buzzing, pulling her out from dreamland.
Still drowsy, the older Gilmore reached the alarm clock on the nightstand and automatically pressed the button to turn it off. She was committed to roll over on bed and let the morning stupor overcome her once more. But the annoying sound resumed.
Oh, great. I hit the snooze mode, Lorelai thought, blindly pressing the alarm button a second time in her typical bad mood before 9 am without coffee. Why the hell Luke set the alarm this early on a Saturday? Is it some kind of sick joke? Does he want a divorce already? I should've included in our vows that one must respect the spouse's pre-rest day, or one is not getting lucky tonight. Wait... This gotta be payback for my Kharma Chameleon prank that messed with his flash mob at the wedding. But he made it so easy for a trickster like me... How did such an experienced man not see that coming? It's like dumb Charlie Brown falling everytime Lucy takes away the football when he is about to kick.
Lorelai's silent ranting about her newly-husband - and Charlie Brown - was interrupted when the noise began a third time. It seemed more intense now because her brain was getting more aware of the surroundings.
"Ugh! Come on!" Lorelai yelled outrageously and unplugged the clock.
A triumphant expression crossed her face. For a second, she believed the battle was over. But the moment was quickly ruined because the buzzing started again. WHAT THE HELL? She jolted and sat on the bed, turning into a big frowny pile of messy hair.
On a whim, the woman almost threw the demonic alarm clock on the wall to solve the problem for good. But, after her eyes adjusted to the light and she was completely awake, she realized the clock had nothing to do with the disturbing sound. The noise was the doorbell ringing.
Lorelai tried to ignore it. She was hoping Rory would get sick of the fuss and just answer the door. But it never happened. Meanwhile, the person outside sounded angrier by the minute. It was possible to feel more urgency each time the doorbell rang. Whoever was out there wasn't going to give up.
Finally, Lorelai surrendered. "Argh! Alright, I'm coming!" She growled and tossed the covers aside, unwillingly getting out of her cozy bed. The woman mumbled all the way downstairs, ready to welcome the uninvited early bird visitor in full bitch mode. However, she never expected to open the door and find none other than her mother, Emily Gilmore, standing on the porch.
"If this is a nightmare on Elm Street, please, I prefer Freddy coming for me." Lorelai shut her eyes and whined under her breath.
"You know it's impossible to comprehend your stand-up comedy routine if you don't speak up," Emily said with irritation, one hand in the air almost reaching the doorbell again. "What took you so long?" She asked and gave her infamous judgemental stare.
"I just enjoy torturing myself," Lorelai failed to hold a yawn and gestured for Emily to come in.
"Were you still in bed? It's past 8 am. Don't you have to go to work?"
"It's Saturday. I'm my own boss. The greatest benefit of having a business and employees in this country is the right of taking a day to stay in bed a little longer. It makes paying lots of taxes worthy," she crossed her arms and continued. "So, what do I owe the pleasure?"
"Well, it is a pretty good day and I was planning to take my granddaughter on a road trip," Emily said with suspicious enthusiasm, already on the way to Rory's room. "You're welcome to join us, since you have the day-off."
There's no way I'm falling into this trap, Lorelai considered and then replied. "I didn't say anything about a day-off. It is just a morning to relax. But I still got a hotel to run and guests checking in after midday," she explained and waited patiently in the living room for Rory's protests against Emily's early appearance. Instead, the only response was her mother's voice.
"Rory's not here. Where did she go?"
"Maybe she ran away and joined the circus."
"You shouldn't quit your day job, Lorelai. That's absolutely not funny." Emily lectured, joining her in the living room again. "Where is she?"
"I don't know. The girl's 33. I don't keep track of her schedule."
"You should. She is living under your roof, after all."
"Here we go again," she inhaled harshly. "Maybe I should put a bug on her phone and monitor her every step, huh?"
"She is pregnant, Lorelai."
"Yes, mom. Pregnant. Not invalid. She's healthy and the baby is healthy. The doctor did not recommend any kind of bedrest. She should only be tied up to a bed, if she is into something kinky."
"She could be lying somewhere, hurt or in danger..."
"In danger? Here in Stars Hollow?" Lorelai stopped for a moment to examine Emily and realized the woman wasn't just being dramatic. There was a genuine concern on her expression. Perhaps, it was time to be less defensive. "Okay... Let's give her a call, just in case."
Lorelai grabbed her phone and hit the speed dial for Rory. The girl picked it up after the third ringing tone.
"Hey! Say something dirty if you're intentionally calling me, otherwise I'll assume you hit the wrong button by mistake again and hang up."
"Something dirty."
"Whoa! You're up already. That's something we don't see every Saturday. The guy holding a sign somewhere to announce the end of the world must be right," Rory laughed.
"Why you're not still in your pajamas at home? Have I taught you nothing right?"
"I had to leave early. Busy day. I'm at the Gazette, finishing the next edition and preparing for a meeting with a group of journalism students from Southern Connecticut State. They want to put our paper on the map, I mean, online. They are willing to work for free and use the project to earn extra credits. But we need a proposal to get Taylor's blessing. So, here I am. I left you a note. There's a post-it on the coffee maker. It was the only spot I thought you wouldn't miss it."
"You put all this information on a tiny post-it? Impressive! Did you write in a secret code?" Lorelai moved in the direction of the coffee machine. "Forget it, I just found the message. It only says 'Gazette early meeting'. Blah!"
"Since you called, you got the updated longer version."
"Let's just say that I didn't have the chance yet to get to the coffee part of the morning."
"Uh-oh. Bad mood alert. I'm glad Luke serves coffee all day at the diner and the cups are big, or Stars Hollow would witness you reenact that Michael Douglas's gun scene from Falling Down."
"I'm not gonna lie. I can totally relate to that rage right now... Your grandma is here, desperate to know your whereabouts."
"Why?"
"Apparently, she wants to take you on a surprise road trip and drive me insane in the process. All I know is: it's not even 8.30 in the morning, on a Saturday, and an annoying noise dragged me out the comfy and soothing arms of Morpheus by force," Lorelai complained as she started to walk around the house.
"Let me talk to Rory, Lorelai." Emily followed her and pleaded. But was completely ignored.
"And now she doesn't stop talking. It's like a loop nightmare. I keep waking up again and again just to face something worse. Please, come home and save me from a terrible fate."
"Sorry, I can't. You'll have to handle Mrs. Freddy Krueger yourself."
"Oh, no no no. I'm sending her on your way. She's going to meet you there." Lorelai fluttered the post-it at Emily's face.
"Mom, I really can't deal with grandma today. I have a lot of work to do."
"Then you talk to her and explain it. I'm done."
"Mom!" Rory protested on the other end of the line, while Lorelai handed the phone to Emily.
"Rory, it's your grandmother. I'm taking you to New York this weekend. To save us time, I can start packing some clothes for you..."
"Grandma, I'd love to..." The girl interrupted. "...but I'm swamped today. I can't drop everything and leave."
As the discussion went on, Lorelai wrote a few instructions for Emily on a small piece of paper. Basically she warned her mother to leave the phone on the table once the call was finished and close the door behind on the way out. The woman was prepared to head back upstairs. But the senior Gilmore didn't seem happy about it.
"Where are you going?" Emily asked, excluding Rory from the conversation.
"Back to bed. I'm not a morning person to be dealing with this right now. I didn't even have my shot of coffee yet."
"Who is going to lock the door?"
"Grandma?! grandma!?" Rory insisted, still lost on the other end of the line.
"You are. Just follow the instructions," Lorelai pointed to the note.
In the meantime, Rory was almost giving up to get anyone's attention. "Grandma!? I'm hanging up..."
"That's unacceptable. Where are your manners? Come back here!" Emily shouted as Lorelai walked away. "Have you listened to your mother, Rory?"
"Mmm-hum. Ignore her for a second and focus on me. What's so important for us to go to New York?"
"The baby's on the way. We need some arrangements to get you ready for it."
"You wanna go shopping?" The girl took a guess. "Well, Luke already covered the baby supplies. And mom and I bought most of the maternity clothes. It was really easy because all I intend to wear is stretch pants and blouses, occasionally a jeans with elastic waistband in case I need a more professional outfit. But I still don't have any bras for breastfeeding. I saved them for last because I want to choose the right size. So I promise I'll let you know and we'll set a date so we can all go together, okay? Mom was going to force me to do a very embarrassing fashion show. I'm counting on you to stop her."
"I don't mean clothes, Rory."
"Now you've completely lost me. I already got comfy shoes too..." Rory replied in confusion.
"We have to find an apartment for you. Today was the only day I was avaiable to come here and my realtor had some time to squeeze us in. I understand you are going to juggle a career and a child. It'll be easier if we get you settled back in New York before the baby arrives."
"Grandma... I can't afford a place in New York at the moment. What I have in my bank account is not enough to live in New Jersey, let alone any of the boroughs."
"Don't be silly! I'll buy a small condo in the city for you."
"You know I can't accept that."
"Fine! I should have guessed your pride wouldn't let you take it. Then I'll pay for rent until you're established."
"I still have no steady income to support me and the baby, grandma. You know that..."
"I have plenty of money and, let's face it, I'm not getting any younger. So I want to put it to good use. I'll cover your expenses until you are back on your feet. That includes a full-time nanny to take care of the child so you can work. It'll give you a head start while you adjust."
Rory remained in silence for a moment. It was a very tempting offer indeed. One she wouldn't think twice in the past. But how different was it from moving to her grandparents' pool house? Or living rent free in Logan's apartment after he graduated and moved to London? She chose the easy way before. Many times. It became a pattern that led to her entitled stupid previous behaviour and ended in a sequence of bad decisions that flushed many good opportunities down the toilet.
It was impossible to go back and redo the past. Rory got that already. However, if she wanted so much a do-over, what was the point of making the same choices again? This was a chance to go for a different path. So when she opened her mouth, the girl answered without hesitation.
"Thanks, but no thanks."
Rory felt a sudden relief by saying the words. But the response was nothing like what Emily expected and she faltered.
After a long pause to organize her thoughts, the senior Gilmore broke the awkward silence. "I promise it won't be like the pool house. I'll stay out of your business."
"No, you won't. You just can't help yourself," the girl chuckled. "But this has nothing to do with it."
"Rory, you don't need to follow your mother's footsteps and take refuge in a shed in the middle of the woods. You're 33 years old. You have a college degree from a top university."
"I know. I think that's exactly my point. Mom had so little and did so much... Wouldn't it be a shame if, with so much, I couldn't build anything by myself?" She paused and waited for a witty comeback, but the only sound on the other end of the line was Emily's silence. "I know I can count on you guys. I'm pretty sure you'll never let me and Bennie starve... But I need to get back on the horse on my own. I admit I was all over the place before, grandma, and you were right to be worried. But now my mind and even all my boxes are in the same address. For the time being, it is Stars Hollow. There's a book in the making. A prospective job. I wanna see where it takes me."
"Is there anything I can say to make you change your mind?"
"No." Rory confirmed. "I really appreciate i..."
"Then, I won't bother you any longer. I don't wanna keep you from work." Emily cut her off and hung up, throwing the phone on the couch.
Alone in the living room, the woman uttered to no one in particular. "Stubborn. Just like her mother." Then she left the house, slamming the door as loud as possible on the way out.
-o-
Emily was not up to a long drive again that day. She was still upset with Rory and there was nothing better to do in Nantucket anyway. That's why she decided to spend the rest of the weekend in Hartford and attend a social event she was invited to weeks ago. Some entertainment was exactly what the senior Gilmore needed to take her mind off things.
So Emily got her hair done and put on her favorite tailleur to enjoy the evening. But the woman didn't expect that, after months away from high society events, she would find it all so damn boring. The same old faces. The fake smiles. The futile small talk over and over... God! The only good distraction was to drown her misery in expensive champagne. As a result, she lost count of how many glasses she had. But for sure it was way too many.
The alcohol did make the party more tolerable. The senior Gilmore even caught herself laughing at lame dad jokes. Still, it didn't ease the disgruntlement about her granddaughter. In fact, booze seemed only to escalate the frustration.
It was a perfectly reasonable plan. There's nothing wrong with a little push. Why does that girl have to be so difficult? Emily thought, fiercely gulping down another glass of Dom Perignon. Of course, she was going to butt heads with me. Most of the time I forget how much Rory and Lorelai are alike. Always on a high horse. Never taking anyone else's advice into consideration. So disrespectful. They are probably having a blast at my expense now, speaking in that nonsense dialect of pop culture and referring to me as Satan, Darth Vander, Miranda Priestly or whatever the name of the most popular evil incarnated on screen these days.
Lost in her wild thoughts, Emily raised her glass to the lips and found it empty again. Impatiently, she signaled a waiter for a refill and one of the servers came around as quickly as humanly possible. But there was no champagne on the tray, only a bottle of scotch and a set of thick bottom glasses. It immediately made her remember Richard.
Whiskey was his favorite drink, she remarked with a faint smile, if he was alive, he'd try to talk me out of this event earlier. He used to hate these gatherings. But I know he would definitely back me up on my plans for Rory... Emily hesitated for a moment. Wouldn't he?
Although they were married for more than 50 years, Emily had to admit she wasn't a hundred percent sure about the answer. In the past, Richard realized before her that sometimes their idea of what was best for Rory wasn't exactly right.
Maybe now the man would say they couldn't solve everything with money and just support the girl's decision to turn things around by herself. She already had a job in sight and probably would be on her feet soon enough. Without interference. It was much more satisfying to succeed like this. Because Rory was her mother's daughter after all. And Richard learned to admire the tenacity of both. Something Emily was still struggling with.
The honest disclosure was making it difficult for Emily to continue holding a grudge against Rory. However, the woman was still deeply annoyed and not ready to let go of the feeling. That's when the universe provided the perfect target for the senior Gilmore to channel her anger into. She spotted Mitchum and Shira Huntzberger in the other corner of the room.
Emily hasn't seen the couple in years. But apparently it wasn't enough time to forget the bad blood between their families. Or perhaps the woman was just really drunk and looking for an excuse to explode. Not good enough, she scoffed and wrinkled her nose in disdain. How dare they look down at the Gilmore's? We were on the Mayflower for God's sake, arrogant stuck-ups! Thinking they're all that because the family empire is now global... Let me remind them what a Gilmore is capable of.
Drunk Emily, the most dangerous one, walked straight in the Huntzberger's direction, ignoring everyone on the way to get to them alone.
"As I live and breathe! Emily, How are you doing?" Mitchum saluted with a fake excitement.
Although her judgement was fuzzy after too many glasses of champagne, the senior Gilmore knew exactly what to say and she got right on it.
"Let's cut to the chase, shall we?" The woman managed to sound completely sober. "Your son better not screw up or he'll be out of that child's life for good. Rory doesn't need him to raise a baby. Our family needs nothing from you, do you hear me?"
Mitchum and Shira looked like they were totally in the dark and had no idea of what Emily was talking about. But she didn't care to ask and turned her back on the stunned couple.
Walking away, the woman snatched a cup full of scotch from the nearest tray and guzzled the drink down in one gulp. "That should set the record straight," she blurted at a perplexed waiter and put the glass back, exiting the dull party right after with no regrets.
A∕N: I don't intend to take so long to update, guys. But work was driving me crazy these past weeks and I need my head clear to write. So, please, be patient with me.
The good news is, with the extra time, I merged two chapters. So you didn't have to wait to see what Emily was going to do next.
I know some people just think Rory should let people continue throwing money at her. I get it. It is easier. But I just can't ignore her graduation speech in season 3. She said Lorelai is her inspiration. And, in my opinion, she would like to follow her hardworking example. At least, I hope so.
Of course, Mitchum and Shira would get the news eventually. But Logan and Rory are still figuring the custody arrangements. So, it was not Emily's place to get the word out.
What do you think is going to happen now? Will this turn into a big mess or what? Review and let me know what you think so far.
PS: I promise more of Christopher soon. It's time for him to show up, right?!