Won't Go Home Without You
"I'm just gonna come right out and say it—I think you're an idiot. And it pains me to say it because I always thought Stefan was the dumb one in the group. But it's you, Damon. You are a certified dumbass. What the hell were you thinking?"
Damon sighed at that as he leaned on the bar and poured himself another shot, before quickly taking it down and looking up to meet the pair of baffled blue-grey eyes ahead of him.
"I wasn't thinking at all—"
"Clearly."
"You know Ric, I really couldn't wait to vent to someone about all of this, just to be called brain-damaged," Damon shot back and Alaric shook his head as he poured a shot as well into his glass and took it back, licking his lips when it was done.
"Listen, I'm really honored that you chose me to come clean to, about all of this shit that's been going on with Bonnie. But I have to ask… why haven't you talked to your brother yet?"
"Saint Stefan? The most judgmental person you and I both know? No thanks. He's made it clear that he wouldn't be supportive of anything between Bonnie and I because of his friendship with Enzo and fine, I get it— "
"Damon don't make excuses for him, you're his brother. I love Enzo too but if it came down to it, I know whose back I'd have in a heartbeat. And it seems like he's forgotten that you were supportive of him finally coming to terms with his feelings for Caroline in college, even when she was seeing me," Alaric reminded, and Damon suddenly remembered how that situation went down.
Caroline started to have feelings for Stefan when he was with his then-girlfriend, Katherine Pierce, and she started to date other people to move on from it; most notably Alaric, for a short stint while they attended Whitmore. When Stefan finally dumped Katherine and came to terms with the fact that he did like Caroline, she was no longer single or waiting for him and they all agreed that if it weren't for her relationship with Ric, he might've never opened his mouth, and let his now wife slip right through his hands.
"Granted, Caroline and I ended things amicably and there was no cheating involved and we are both way better off but… he'd be a hypocrite if he held this over your head for your entire life, especially when he's been in your shoes."
Damon sighed with a nod before Alaric continued.
"You're right."
"In either case… I am happy that you trust me that much and you know your secret is safe with me. But the fact remains that you love Bonnie. You are in love with her and you just walked away—even though she wanted you back... I'm just struggling to comprehend how any of that makes sense. This isn't what either of you wanted."
Damon sighed because he couldn't even comprehend it himself.
It been two weeks since the rave and the night when he stopped by Bonnie's place to end things and he couldn't rid himself of the feeling that he made a huge mistake calling it all off with her, despite it not being anything close to what he truly wanted. Especially because it was painstakingly clear that Bonnie was all in on this but he suddenly wasn't, the second he came to terms with the fact that he was a bad person.
He'd called her the following day to apologize—to at least ask to be friends again—but Bonnie didn't budge, and he knew she wouldn't. Her stubbornness was one of the reasons he was so attracted to her. The girl knew what she did and didn't want. And right now, she didn't want any contact with him. In fact, she blocked his number, as every call since then went straight to her voicemail and he continued to leave messages until her mailbox was full.
And now here he was at the Grill, because he needed to talk to someone about it and he figured Caroline was a no-go, as his sister-in-law made it clear she was Team Bonnie on this one and just as pissed off as she was with him. Maybe even more so, and Caroline was sometimes the scariest person on the planet when she was mad. Especially when it came to defending her friends.
So, he called up Alaric and decided to finally come clean because why not at this point? He had already been suspicious that something was going on after he witnessed that argument between him and Elena, so he figured he had nothing left to lose at this point by finally being honest about what had actually happened. He and Bonnie weren't much of anything anymore, not even acquaintances, and it wasn't like he expected anyone to be on his side—he knew what he did was stupid—but he just needed someone to talk to about it. And who better than Alaric, considering he wasn't Stefan or Enzo and he probably wouldn't punch him in the face, but instead talk him off of this ledge he'd found himself on, all because he let Elena's reaction to the news get to him.
Honestly? Maybe he was dumber than Stefan was.
Damon slid another large bill on the counter and the bartender, Sophie, wordlessly gifted them with another bottle of whiskey as she went to tend to the other patrons and he smiled bitterly, pouring another round of shots as Alaric still awaited a response.
He needed to be really, really drunk to understand this.
"Elena said I couldn't be in love with Bonnie because of all of the shit I was ready to put her through, just to be with me," he said, and Alaric lifted a brow at that as Damon continued. "And she has a point, right? I dated her for a third of my life, wasted her time, made her think that I still loved her when I moved on mentally— "
"So, let me get this straight— you listened to Elena; who you just confessed to not having feelings for anymore, despite the fact that you dated her for a decade, because you were into her best friend? You realize her view on this wouldn't be anything but vindictive, shallow-minded, and spiteful, right?"
Damon shrugged and Alaric laughed humorlessly with the shake of his head.
"Dude."
"You don't think she manipulated me, do you?" Damon asked and Alaric smirked with a knowing look on his face while Damon furrowed his brows. "That's impossible. You didn't see it. She was upset and hyperventilating. And all tears— "
"Because she doesn't want you to be happy after what you put her through, Damon, and rightfully so… But if Elena was as miserable as I remember that she was with you, she had the option to leave as well. Maybe you shouldn't have taken her back. Maybe you shouldn't have chased her. But you both knew what you were doing in my opinion. You used her as a crux, and she thought you'd have no choice but to marry her because of your history… but that's not how love works. It shouldn't be how it works, anyway."
Damon ticked his jaw at that, and Alaric sat up straighter as he shook his head.
"I'm not saying you're not at fault because you are. You're an asshole. But this is her revenge fantasy. She wanted you to second-guess yourself when it came to Bonnie and it worked. Congratulations, you just let your ex-girlfriend who despises you weigh in on your current love life and torch it to pieces."
Damon sat back at that and placed both hands to his temples as he really thought back on that night and how devastated she had been when he told her that he was in love with Bonnie. She drew him in by flirting with Enzo in front of him, knowing that he'd be quick to step up and stop her because of Bonnie. He followed her in his car for 10 minutes after she lured him away from the rave, seemingly high and drunk on whatever the hell she had consumed that night, but by the time he got to her house, she was stone-faced and completely coherent; not a tear in sight, as she made it into her home all by herself.
Could it be that she really just tried to make him feel as shitty as possible about all of this for retribution?
"She wouldn't do that to Bonnie, Ric. I know her."
"She wasn't doing to Bonnie. She was doing this to you. Sounds like Elena 101, since we were kids, Damon. She overreacted and you fell for it. You fell right into the trap." Damon ticked his jaw at that, and Alaric sat up straighter well he folded his hands and looked deep into his eyes. "The question is, what are you gonna do about it?"
"What do you mean? I missed my shot and Bonnie does not give second ones. She's not even answering my calls."
"Looks like you're gonna have to try a little harder then," Alaric said, and Damon ticked his jaw. "I'm talking possibly a skywriter. I know a guy."
"She doesn't want me anymore, Ric. She fucking hates me, actually. And she made herself clear when she said if I walked away there was no going back."
"No, the problem is that she does want you—and you broke her heart because you let your ex-girlfriend guilt-trip you… Look, I know you think you're a shitty person because of all of this. And you probably are, there's a good argument to be made about the fact that you slept with one of your best friend's fiancés the night before their wedding and you still haven't told him about it."
"There's no point anymore. Bonnie and I are through— "
"Do you honestly believe that?" Alaric asked and Damon exhaled without a response because even though he felt like he and Bonnie were done, it certainly wasn't what he wanted, and he fucking hated the fact that he had been so damn impulsive. "Look, you know Bonnie better than I do—in plenty of ways that I now know I never needed to hear about—but she's been my friend for years, too. And we work together. And for as angry as she is with you right now, you know that she doesn't give up on the people that she loves. Especially if they make an earnest and honest effort to right what they did wrong."
Damon swallowed hard at that, his finger dragging along the rim of the shot glass as he looked away and lowered his voice in a serious tone.
"Even if I make it right, and she does accept my apology… she doesn't love me, Ric. I told her that I loved her. That I have for twelve years and… she didn't say it back."
"Why do you need to hear the words if you know the truth? She's so heartbroken because it took just one bad reaction to send you running for the hills, even though you promised her more than that. She deserved better than that… She left Enzo at an altar for you… she was willing to lose a friend and endure the ridiculous commentary and unwarranted judgment from everyone in this dumbass town just to be with you. And that means that she loves you, Damon. Not just saying the words but actually proving them with your actions… Just like you've done for her. You've loved her for twelve years—your actions have always shown that; I've always seen that, so screw Elena. Screw what everyone thinks at this point. You never needed to leave her to prove it. And I know you think you did it out of selflessness, but you didn't. You did it out of cowardice and self-preservation. And that's the last thing you should want for her—to fall in love with a fucking coward."
Damon's hands tightened and his jaw clenched as he reached Alaric's eyes—the sincerity in them was shining through and he let out a deep sigh because he knew what he was saying was the truth. Bonnie didn't deserve better than him; she deserved better than this version of him who was way too scared to just take the plunge and be all in on this, just like she proved she was. He let himself believe Elena's words because maybe he'd been secretly looking for a reason to stop this, because it still scared and unsettled him, despite how unapologetic about it he wanted to be.
Bonnie wanted him.
She made it clear that night and still, he threw all of that away for what? A cheap attempt at feeling he like he was doing the right and selfless thing, even though he was just breaking her heart in the process? The only thing he wanted more than to be able to take back all that he had said to her was wishing he had spoken to Alaric about this sooner—it seemed like he would've been able to knock some sense into him since day one.
Damon's foot tapped against the ground and he finally looked up with an even expression though he was bursting at the seams.
He had been, since he last saw her.
"What do you suggest I do? A la, grand gestures and what not," Damon said, and Alaric smiled as he sat up, folding his hands. "She hates sky writers; thinks they're stupid."
"What does she like, besides having sex with you? Lord knows we can fast-forward past that part this time," Alaric said, and Damon smirked as his friend continued on. "She loves Christmas, doesn't she?''
"It's her favorite holiday. She lives for Christmas."
"Get her a gift, obviously… something deep and meaningful… doesn't hurt if it's expensive," Alaric replied before licking his lips.
"Of course, that's a given. But what do I before then? Christmas is a week away."
"There's… this thing I'm tempted to tell you about, but only if you promise you'll be chill if I take you."
"I'm honing in on my best behavior skills, as we speak."
"The Winter Gala at Whitmore is tomorrow. Come with me to it. Jo's on call and can't make it," Alaric said as Damon bit his lip and listened on. "All us professors get together with the dean and rich alumni to schmooze for a few hours, and honestly it's boring as hell but the food's good and there's an open bar… Maybe you should show up—try to plead your case with Bonnie there. She's less likely to murder you if she's in front of a bunch of colleagues and bosses."
Damon thought about it for a moment and before he could think about a reason not to ruin Bonnie's night by going, he stopped himself and nodded his head in agreement as Alaric smiled and filled up their shot glasses for one more.
"She's probably going to cut my spleen out when she sees me… but she's worth it, right?"
"She is indeed," Alaric replied as they picked up their glasses and he met his eyes. "I know that I try to keep my praise of you to a bare minimum—especially when I find out shit like this—but I know you have it in you, Damon. And so did your Dad… And so does Bonnie… she believed in you. So, don't let her down again."
Damon nodded as he took back his shot and let out an exhale when he looked into his eyes; his voice was honest and even.
"Never again."
And it was the first time he actually believed it; the first time that he felt like he really meant it.
XXXXX
"Are you sure you're gonna be okay going to the gala alone tonight? Stefan's at the fire department but I can get the nanny to stay the night with the boys if you really need me."
Bonnie sighed into the receiver at Caroline's words, as she steamed her beige gown in her living room, with her cell phone sandwiched between her ear and her shoulder.
"I'm perfectly fine going stag, Caroline—I promise. Plus, Nora will be there; she'll keep me company."
"Is that the Women's Studies professor who wants to get in your pants?"
"She doesn't wanna get in my pants."
"Why not? I would if I weren't straight."
Bonnie laughed at that and Caroline giggled on the other end of the receiver as the brunette shook her head and exhaled. If it hadn't been for Caroline's ridiculous commentary this past week and constant checking in on her, she was sure she would've lost her mind.
It'd been two weeks since she had spoken to Damon—she specifically blocked Damon, actually—and instead of allowing herself to wallow in defeat and self-loathing, she decided she was going to continue on with the rest of her life. That included still attending this gala at her job tonight although she was dateless, because she had previously planned on asking Damon when she got the invitation, but she never got around to it and now she was happy that she hadn't.
He'd dumped her, merely moments after telling her he was in love with her, and she decided she could no longer be emotionally invested if he was just going to jerk her around like he did to Elena, because he couldn't just go after what he wanted. It made her annoyed, actually, at the irony in the fact that he'd been so persistent about how she would handle this but when it came down to it, she wasn't the one that walked away. He did.
And while she still loved him—she was trying to numb herself and her mind to the fact that she still did—she wasn't going to let heartbreak run or ruin her life.
She was going to carry on. And Damon was going to have to live with his decision.
"As flattered as I am by that, I'm not exactly Nora's type. Judging by her ex Mary Louise I'd say she's more into blondes who are a little unhinged."
"Oh okay, so Rebekah Mikaelson, then," Caroline joked, and Bonnie rolled her eyes at that.
"Damon's probably already all over that," she mumbled and stopped herself shaking her head. "I'm sorry. I said I was not going to talk about him again— "
"Bonnie, you can talk about him," Caroline reassured as the brunette but her lip. "You don't have to pretend like you're okay if you're not. I'm pissed at Damon too. And I let him hear it that night. It's like, he finally got what he wanted handed to him on a silver platter and he just— "
"Blew it," Bonnie said softly. "And I'm not gonna chase him Caroline. I refuse to. I've got too much self respect and dignity and if Damon made this choice, he's just gonna have to live with it. He'll have to live without me."
"I agree. You deserve the world, Bon. And though I might've believed for five seconds that he'd be the one to give that to you, it looks like Damon proved us wrong, in typical fashion… I'm just sorry you got hurt in the process."
"I'll be fine," Bonnie swallowed hard. "That includes tonight as well, okay? But thank you, for checking in—for being a friend throughout this entire process."
"Always, Bon… Speaking of friends… have you heard from Elena?"
"Nope," Bonnie shook her head and she heard an audible frown on the other line before she continued. "I even stopped by her place yesterday when Jo told me her shift ended and she just never showed up. She's avoiding me. Have you heard from her?"
"Yeah, actually," Caroline eased, and Bonnie stopped steaming as she listened to the blonde on the line. "She's having a New Years Party at her place in a few weeks and she… stopped by to invite me. She said everyone was going." Bonnie ticked her jaw at that, and she heard Caroline exhale a deep breath. "But I'm not going unless she invites you, too, Bon— "
"I don't expect to be invited and I don't expect for you not to go, just because I can't," she said running her fingers over her dress. "You guys are friends too. You have been, forever, and I don't want you to choose me over her. Besides, it'll be fun, I'm sure," she nodded, feeling a sudden wave of sadness wash over her.
For years, she, Caroline, and Elena had spent New Years Eve together; it was Elena's favorite holiday, and since they were teens they would get dressed up in their favorite outfits just to party with each other in the living room, with snacks, music, and a bottle of champagne when Mrs. Gilbert made sure Elena's dad had fallen asleep. They kept the tradition up for years to follow, even though they were now adults, though they slowly expanded the invitation list to include their group of friends and they always had a wonderful time.
She now had to accept that this year would be a little different. And a lot lonelier.
"Bonnie— "
Before Caroline could continue, she heard a knock on her front door, and she lifted a brow as she spun around and approached it.
"Hey Care, can I call you later after the gala? Someone's here."
"Of course. Let me know how it all goes. Maybe it's Elena—she finally came to her senses."
"I highly doubt that. Probably just the Fed-ex guy. Talk to you later," Bonnie said before she hung up and her hand twisted at the knob to reveal a dark-haired man beyond the threshold, staring her with an uneasy smile.
It was safe to say it was not Elena, but he also wasn't the delivery man.
"Hi Bonnie," Enzo said gently, and she tucked a strand behind her ear as she looked into his dark brown eyes.
"Hey," she said softly, "what are you doing here?"
"I brought you something—your check, from the sale of the house," he held up the envelope and she remained silent. "I know you said I could put it in the mail, but I figured we were due for a chat. Do you mind if I come in?"
"Um, yeah sure," she nodded as she stepped aside and allowed him the space to walk in.
She watched him carefully as his eyes roamed the décor of the condo and he spun around to meet her. Her arms folded over her chest when she realized she was just in her robe and he cleared his throat uncomfortably when he realized it as well.
"I'm regretful I caught you at a bad time…"
"It's fine. Can I get you anything? Water? Coffee?"
"I'm fine," he said, and Bonnie's lips pressed shut as they just stood there looking at one another for a moment before he cleared his throat and spoke again. "How've you been?"
"I'm okay… You?" she asked airily, and he offered a tight smile before his response.
"I've been okay too, I suppose… Your, uh, new place is nice. You've done a great job with it."
"Thank you, yeah. I finally finished decorating and everything this past week."
"Just in time for Christmas."
"Of course."
Another long pause floated between them before she motioned to the couch and they sat down beside one another. Enzo bit his lip as he looked down before finally finding her eyes again, with a piercing stare.
"So, here it is," he held up the envelope with the check. "The lawyer split everything up evenly and said if you have any questions to just call or stop by."
He handed the check over to her and Bonnie nodded as she took it into her hand and placed it on the table. That was it. A piece of paper was all that they had left to show for three years. When Enzo texted her a few weeks ago that he was going to put their house up for sale because he'd found a new loft on the other side of Mystic Falls, she could say nothing other than she agreed that it was probably for the best, considering all the history they had there.
She'd been able to escape it by moving into a shiny new place downtown, but he hadn't. And he figured it was finally time to move on and let it go. Neither one of them expected the place to sell in just days. But maybe that was the universe's doing.
Her foot involuntarily tapped on the ground before she flashed him a soft smile.
"Thank you for… making this as easy as possible. This part of it anyway."
"You don't have to thank me. I figured I owed you that much. I'm… sorry I've been dodging your calls and text messages lately. I was upset," he said honestly, and she ticked her jaw. "It was hard to hear about you finding someone new while I was just… barely holding it together. I just needed some time to process it all— "
"I understand. And I don't expect you to forgive me, Enzo. What I did… how I've gone about things has been awful and I know you deserved better. You still do. And I just wanted you to know that I'm sorry. I'm really sorry that I hurt you."
"I'll bounce back eventually," he said as he looked into her eyes and she felt a lump forming in her throat. "But I'd like it if we could be friends, eventually. Perhaps one day."
Bonnie exhaled at that and shook her head.
"I think you deserve better friends than me. Especially when I—" she stopped and she shut her eyes for a moment as she felt her hands suddenly trembling at what she wanted to say—what she needed to say—because she'd held onto this truth for far too long.
He deserved to know about she and Damon, once and for all, even if there was technically no she and Damon anymore. He deserved to know the real reason why she left—the real reason why even looking at him now made her feel nothing, aside from pain, nausea, and regret. Because it hurt her that she hurt him; she felt sick to her stomach about what she had done, and she wished she could go back and change things but at this point she couldn't. She couldn't change the fact that she didn't love him in the way that he loved her.
And she surely couldn't escape the fact that the man that she did love walked away, like it was so easy to him, even though Enzo never left. Even when he should've.
She reopened her eyes when she felt Enzo's hands against hers, rubbing them softly with his thumb and a look of concern crossed his face as he stared at her, awaiting her next words.
"Are you okay?" he asked, and she shook her head no and he moved in a bit closer, as his brows scrunched together. "Bonnie… if this is about Elena— "
"Elena?" She asked and her heart began to race. "Why would this be about Elena?"
"I'm sure Damon told you about guy's night… how we all ended up at a rave…"
"Briefly."
"I… got pretty drunk. Took one of those stupid little pills, which in retrospect was a bad move. I just can't hang like I used to—I was hungover for 3 days, at least, but… we saw Elena there. We talked. She asked me to dance," he said as Bonnie licked her teeth but remained quiet. "I mean, it was supposed to be innocent enough. We were just having fun. But in the moment… it started to get a little too… It didn't look the best, I guess. And Damon came over and stopped it, right before she almost… kissed me. And I'm sorry about it. I am, because she's your friend and it's not my intention to make a fool out of you, you know. And Elena, I'm sure she didn't mean it either."
Of course, she didn't, Bonnie thought but put it out of her mind as she nodded her head.
"I appreciate that," she said as she watched him still holding onto her hands, she slowly pulled them away as he inhaled deeply.
There was another steady pause between them until he spoke again, changing the subject.
"Beautiful dress," he said as he looked at the gown hanging across the room and Bonnie sighed. "What's the occasion?"
"The… Whitmore Winter Gala. It's tonight," she said, and he nodded in remembrance; he'd gone as her date the past two years. "Listen, we need to talk..." she said suddenly as he looked up. "About… the guy I was seeing— "
"No offense love, but I don't want to know anything about him," Enzo said as he stood to his feet and her olive eyes met his. "No disrespect to you and your new boyfriend but— "
"He's not… we aren't together," she eased as his eyes softened. "We… ended things," she breathed, and he blinked slowly at that.
Another long pause passed between them before he cleared his throat.
"So, you're going to the gala alone?"
"It's not a big deal, Enzo— "
"It is… Let me escort you. As friends of course," he said, and Bonnie's eyes widened at that. "Oh, come on. I know a lot of your co-workers; I could talk to them while you do your own thing. It won't be a date. Just one friend helping another, so you aren't by yourself."
"I… don't know that it's a great idea, Enzo. We… everyone kind of knows what happened at the wedding between us. When I walked out," she tugged at her lip with her teeth. "I don't want to put you through that."
"While I completely understand your sentiment, I can't agree. That dress is too beautiful for you not to show up with someone on your arm and this used to be our tradition. You can rent me, just for the night. Look at this as a fresh start for us by doing something familiar."
"Rent you?" She finally laughed and he smiled in return before she finally shrugged her shoulders because honestly at this point? What the hell. "Fine. Pick me up at 6. It starts at 7pm sharp."
Enzo gave her a nod at that before he was out the door and Bonnie exhaled when he left, before turning back to her dress and turning the steamer on.
This was going to be one hell of a night.
XXXXX
"How's my hair?"
"You've asked me five times, Damon. You're even worse than my wife."
"I just want to make sure Bonnie's not gonna be able to take her eyes off of me when she sees me," he said as his hands slid into the pockets of his black on black Ralph Lauren suit and Alaric rolled his eyes as they walked into the grand ballroom at Whitmore college—a string quartet playing soft music in the background, and a decently sized crowd gathered already, sharing stories over drinks and appetizers as waiters tray-passed champagne and hors d'oeuvres to the guests in attendance.
Damon had to admit, this was fancier than he was expecting, as his eyes glazed over the winter themed decorations that were probably curated by Bonnie herself, as every single detail was perfectly in place.
He followed Alaric to the bar, and he ordered a ginger ale, which caused his friends eyes to bug immediately when the bartender slid him his whiskey and he watched Damon immediately nursing the soda in his hand.
"No alcohol tonight?"
"Yeah, if I want this to be a suicide mission… We saw what happened the last time I got drunk and had a talk with Bonnie. I accidentally broke up with her."
"Good point. You're driving home then," Alaric smiled, and Damon rolled his eyes as his friend took a sip of his drink and looked at his watch.
Before Damon could make a snide comment in return, he was positive he looked up and saw an angel in the form of Bonnie Bennett. His mouth suddenly went dry as he watched her walk into the ballroom; her beige gown flowing to the ground and her jet black hair styled in loose waves, as her thick black lashes seemed to go on forever and her lips were painted with a deep red matte lipstick he faintly remembered staining his lips, one night at the boarding house when he convinced her to spend the night.
He went to take a step forward but stopped when he saw Bonnie turn around to wait for someone and within a millisecond, Enzo was at her side, smiling as he walked in beside her and Damon suddenly felt a mixture of queasiness and rage though he was doing his best not to show it. Especially when Bonnie and Enzo spotted him from across the floor and the man waved while she just stood there, awe-stricken and confused about the fact that he was even there in the first place.
Damon watched as Bonnie said something to Enzo quickly before walking off and Enzo began to walk over, smile still on his face, until he made it to the bar and greeted him and Alaric before ordering a drink for himself and Bonnie.
Damon glanced at Alaric who shot him his best be cool glance and he unclenched his jaw long enough to smile back in Enzo's direction.
What the hell was he doing here?
"Small world," Enzo said with a smirk as he eyed them both, placing his hands in the pockets of his black tux. "Are you Ric's date?" he directed at Damon and he swallowed hard with a nod before sipping his drink.
"Jo couldn't get off work. I'm just filling in."
"Fantastic."
"You're here with Bonnie?" Alaric asked bluntly and Enzo shrugged with a grin as he eyed them both.
"It sort of just happened. We're here as friends, of course. But rumor has it she and her boyfriend broke up," he said, and Damon's eyes narrowed but he remained silent. "I wonder if the unlucky bastard will be here tonight. I'd love to meet him."
"Wouldn't we all," Damon said sarcastically, and Alaric immediately interrupted as he placed a hand on Enzo's shoulder and smiled as he pulled him in closer.
"Hey, buddy—you never told me about the new exhibit at the museum. Jo has been dying to stop by with the girls, make a day out of it."
"I would love that," Enzo said as he grabbed the drinks he ordered. "We'll talk after I get this to Bonnie— "
"Damon can do that. Right Damon?" Alaric asked and Damon swallowed hard as he met his glaring blue eyes and Alaric took the drink out of Enzo's hand and gave it to him. "I just really gotta know about this exhibit. For Jo," he smiled brightly.
Enzo laughed and continued as Damon walked away swiftly with Bonnie's cosmopolitan in hand. He squeezed through the crowd and he felt the eyes of more than a few women roam over him salaciously though his stare was focused on only one person.
He stopped when he saw her, talking to Nora Hildegard— he remembered meeting her a few times in the past for Happy Hour with Bonnie's co-workers—and he had to take a moment to catch his breath when he really got a look at her.
She looked beautiful. He knew that she would, as her waves cascaded down her naked back, and the thin spaghetti straps from the gown were delicately placed at her shoulders, as the dress hugged her frame all the way down to the floor. There was an aura around her—dazzling, intoxicating, mystifying, as she talked, and he had to work up the nerve just to take another step towards her because he knew that he didn't deserve this. He didn't deserve to even be breathing the same air that she did after what he had pulled, but he hoped a sincere and sober apology would change her mind.
Bonnie was probably the most headstrong person that he knew. And when she put her mind to something—like avoiding the hell out of him—she generally succeeded. It was going to take a lot to change her mind and a pretty large gesture—he was still working on that part—but he hoped for at least tonight, she could hear him out.
And also, possibly explain what the hell she was doing here with her ex-fiancé, of all people.
He inhaled and gathered every ounce of bravery he had left and walked towards her—his eyes piercing through her—and she finally noticed him, as her brows furrowed and he was before her, before she could say a word, handing her a drink with a soft expression on his face though he was quietly losing his shit.
On the inside, his nerves were wreaking havoc on him.
"A cosmopolitan, as ordered," he said, and Nora flashed him a smile before leaning in for a hug while Bonnie stood there silent all the while.
"Oh my god Damon, it's been forever. We miss you at Happy Hour!"
"I'm usually working during Happy Hour," he smiled, and Nora nodded in understanding. "How have you been?"
"Great! I was just telling Bonnie we should all get together for the New Year if you two don't have plans. Dinner and everything, it's going to be amazing," she said.
"Damon will be busy," Bonnie said flatly, and Damon laughed dryly before he responded.
"How would you know? You've stopped taking my phone calls."
"Because you're a dick."
Nora glanced between him and Bonnie and noticed an air of awkwardness instantly as they weren't even looking each other in the eyes and Bonnie suddenly looked pissed off beyond imagination.
"This… seems like a private matter. I'm gonna go to the bar for a refill," she flashed them both an uneasy smile before holding up her empty martini glass and scurrying off as Bonnie turned to walk away as well and Damon grabbed her arm and lowered his tone.
"Bonnie, can we talk?"
"No," she said immediately, and his eyes finally met hers—her green ones filled with fury though she was speaking calmly and evenly. "Is it not enough that you're crashing my work party, but you need to talk to me here too? I blocked your number for a reason, Damon."
"I'm here to apologize," he said, and Bonnie rolled her eyes. "I know that I hurt you and it was unexpected and I'm sorry about that… I… shouldn't have left. I should've stayed— "
"Yeah, Damon, you should've. Because I made myself perfectly clear when I said that I was done if you walked away and I am. I'm still done with you."
He felt his chest tighten at that and Bonnie's eyes remained stone cold as he investigated them and he ticked his jaw as he looked to the ground and finally back up at her.
"Is that why you're here with Enzo? We're through, so you're backsliding with your ex-fiancé?"
"Don't give me the jealous boyfriend bullshit, Damon. I mean it," she shot back, and he pressed his lips shut. "We're friends. He's here as my friend. Something that you used to be until you decided this. Not me. So, you need to live with it."
"How could I live with this if I can't live without you?"
"You'll figure it out. There are plenty of beautiful unsuspecting women here you can rebound with," she snapped, and he scoffed when he took step in ever closer and lowered his voice.
"I'm not the one rebounding Bonnie, you are. And you fucking know it."
Bonnie didn't have a chance to respond as Enzo walked over, and they both straightened up when he appeared besides Bonnie and casually placed his hand around her waist. Bonnie pursed her lips and Enzo turned to face her with a gentle tone as Damon's eyes remained fixed at his hand touching her hip.
This guy really had the fucking nerve.
"The dean has been asking about you. He's over there," Enzo nodded across the room and Bonnie smiled uneasily when she met his eyes. "Do you want to head over?"
"Sure, in a minute. Damon and I are just catching up."
Enzo nodded as he walked off and Damon's brows scrunched as he looked into her eyes and she remained stoic though she was bursting at the seams.
"Just friends? Does he know that?"
"Fuck you, Damon. Please, feel free to leave whenever you're ready. That's what you're best at anyway."
She shouldered him out the way and walked off at that while he breathed heavily as he watched her make her way across the room and paint on another smile, though if he knew Bonnie he knew this was killing her just as much as it was killing him.
Or at least he hoped it was. Otherwise, he had lost before he had even begun.
XXXXX
Damon watched from the bar, another ginger ale in hand, as Bonnie and Enzo took to the dance floor during a slow waltz that started. His eyes had been laser focused on her for about an hour and she didn't look in his direction once, as she mingled around the room with Enzo at her side and now she was in arms, as Damon was just about ready to crush the glass he was holding, the longer he became lost in his thoughts.
He remembered the night before the wedding, when they danced to her wedding song, because she was nervous about it. So, he put on the track, extended a hand and got her to slow dance with him for what would be the first time since her senior prom, right there in the boarding house living room.
The lights were low and they were both drunk but that didn't seem to matter as they swayed and he remembered Bonnie's laugh as he spun her around before she landed in his arms and gave him a huge hug that engulfed him entirely as the song faded out and he felt her warm breath on his shoulder as she just stood there, content and comfortable within his arms.
When she pulled away, his fingers softly met his mother's necklace that she had come there for as it lay perfectly on her chest and Bonnie looked up at him quietly when his hand dropped away from the pendant and he offered her a smile.
"It looks great on you."
He remembered she thanked him; suddenly flustered as they stood less a hair apart and he tucked a strand behind her ear while she still looked at him madly; like she didn't know what could happen.
But she was ready for it.
She was ready for him.
Their first kiss was a few minutes later. Soft, sweet, and burning, as they sat at the grand piano in his living room and she asked Damon to play her a song—to distract from the undeniable heat she felt towards him after they danced and she stared into his eyes for what felt like the first time in her life.
The piano playing didn't help, because he was actually good, and she was surprised because in all their years of friendship he never played it for her. She didn't even know that this piano was here for anything other than show.
Damon itched with remembrance as his muscle memory reminded him of the exact key his finger had pressed to when looked up and saw Bonnie staring at him—enamored by him— and he decided this was his chance. He wanted to kiss her. He needed to, for he might never have a chance to do this again and he needed her to know how he felt about her all these years.
He wanted her to know that he was the one for her. And he always would be; she was his soulmate.
Damon looked up again across the ballroom and he mindlessly listened on to Alaric's conversation with Nora behind him, before he silently walked away and they both eyed each other as Damon made a direct descent for Bonnie while she was still dancing with Enzo.
When he approached her, she remained rigid but he didn't let it deter him as he looked into her eyes sharply though he was speaking to Enzo.
"Do you mind if I cut in?"
Enough was enough of this shit.
"She's all yours, mate," Enzo said with a release of Bonnie's hand as he turned to Bonnie with a smile, "I'll see you in a bit, love."
"Sure," she said with a nod as they watched him walk off.
Bonnie stared at Damon and he extended his hand towards her silently, as his big blue eyes seemed to stare straight through her though she didn't look away.
Without a word she took his invitation and their palms met, as his other hand slid onto her back and she gulped at the feeling of his skin on hers though she fought hard against any goosebumps as they moved in silence.
Their steps were in sync, just as they had always been, and Damon had to remind himself to breath, when he looked down into her eyes and saw she was looking straight back at him, though her glare hadn't softened in the least and he knew more words fueled with venom lay behind her tongue, though she was holding them in for the sake of her professional career.
He twirled her around and Bonnie bit her lip when her back pressed to his chest and he leaned down softly and spoke into her ear as she stared straight ahead.
"I'm sorry," he said gently, and she listened on, as his hands met her sides before he spun her back around. "I'm sorry that I hurt you," he replied, and she didn't respond as he followed her eyes that shot him a look like daggers. "If we can talk—if you'll please talk to me—I would be forever grateful. Just one conversation, Bon. That's all I ask. I'm not trying to justify myself. I just… need you know how sorry I am. Okay?"
Bonnie took a staggered breath at that but reluctantly nodded as she looked across the room and saw Enzo was pre-occupied in a conversation with a few of her co-workers. Hopefully he'd be there a while.
"Let's go," she said simply as she took his hand and Damon's stomach did backflips as they exited the ballroom and slipped out a door in the back to the outdoor terrace.
The night was beautifully illuminated by the stars, and the sound of the string quartet and conversations faded to nothing more than white noise, as they stood face to face and Damon slipped off his jacket and placed it over her shoulders when he watched the crisp air expelled from her mouth.
Bonnie didn't say a word but tightened it around herself. And Damon finally spoke.
"You were right," he said, and Bonnie remained silent as his blue eyes looked straight into hers, without blinking or turning away. "I shouldn't have walked away from you. It was stupid and impulsive, and I thought I was doing the right thing—I thought it'd be best for you if I walked away but it wasn't. I was a coward; a fucking spineless coward. And you deserved better than that, Bonnie. You deserved so much more."
Bonnie's lips were still pressed shut and her face remained imperturbable as she stared at him quietly. He took that as his cue that she was still listening, and he was just grateful she hadn't strangled him with his tie right now though he was sure he deserved it. He didn't deserve to be in her presence.
"I made a lot of promises that I broke that night when I left," he said as she folded her arms over her chest. "And I'll never forgive myself for that; it'll weigh on my conscious forever that I walked away—that I let the woman that I love go—but just know whether you decide to speak to me or not, it won't happen again. I… won't let you down ever again."
Bonnie licked her teeth at that as she followed his eyes and finally opened her mouth to talk.
Her voice was hollow as she addressed him, but her eyes held something more behind them as she tried not to let it filter into her voice.
She nearly succeeded, with a shaky but steady tone.
"I don't know if I can believe that, Damon," she shook her head, finding his stare. "I used to believe that; I believed you were the one person who never would've left me, no matter what was happening. I believed you'd always just be there and maybe that's my fault, for putting you so high up on a pedestal that you couldn't live up to. Maybe I just forgot that you were human, too, sometimes," she said gently, and he tugged at his bottom lip with his teeth though he didn't say a word. "But you broke my heart, Damon. You… made me believe all these things and your words and I fell for it. I actually thought we'd have a chance and… you threw that all away, even though I asked you not to. I begged you to stay."
"I know," he said and she blinked back tears that were in her eyes and he immediately felt like the worst person on the planet because here he was, making her cry again when he only ever wanted to apologize; he just wanted her to know how much she meant to him, despite his mistake. He just wanted her to know how much he loved her, even if she couldn't love him back; even if her heart would not allow her to, ever again. "There's no excuse. I psyched myself out. I didn't think things through. I wanted to protect you from me, and I know it's not enough of an explanation but it's what I felt. I… love you so much that I thought the only way to prove that was by walking away. Because I'm damaged, Bon. I'm not well—I'm all kinds of fucked up in the head and the heart and you… You've always been better than me. You're the pinnacle of everything to me. And I'm nothing close to that; to you."
"None of that mattered to me, Damon, don't you get it? I never needed you to be someone else or somebody that you're not because I loved you," she said and his heart stopped at the words; his eyes softened even more and he watched as a tear rolled down her cheek as she quickly wiped it away and continued. "I loved you, Damon. Even though it was so hard for me to say it. Because I didn't want to. I don't want to… Especially not now, not after you left me," she added a bit more firmly and he pursed his lips. "I understand your reasons and I get it; I do. But maybe you were right. Maybe we're better off letting this go, because it hurts too damn much. Maybe we're both too fucked up to be together and happy— "
"No," he said softly as he grabbed her hands and she watched the fire and emotion that she had fallen in love with suddenly fill his eyes as he stared back at her, shaking his head. "It hurts because I screwed up, but I can make it right. I want to fix this, Bon. I need to."
"What if it's too late?"
"Then I'm a fool for having hope. But I do have hope for us," he said as his hand met her cheek and a tear rolled down her jaw. "I just… need you say that you do too. That you believe in this; in us."
Before Bonnie could respond she looked to see Enzo approaching and she swallowed hard as Damon's fingers were still cradling her cheek, while he walked over with a look of confusion on his face when he witnessed the scene.
Damon dropped his hand when he read her expression and he turned around, trying his best not to let out an audible groan when his friend walked over cutting their moment short for the second time this night. Bonnie forced a weak smile onto her lips when Enzo stood beside her; his eyes examined her with worry before he finally looked towards Damon.
Damon's thoughts were racing a mile a minute.
"Is everything okay? You look upset, Bonnie," he said, and she nodded silently.
"We're actually in the middle of something if you don't mind giving us a moment," Damon said sharply, and Enzo's brow lifted at that as he looked into his eyes and shook his head.
"She looks upset, Damon. And I'm not going to leave her alone with you if you're the one whose caused it."
Damon's jaw ticked at that and Bonnie immediately turned to face Enzo as a sudden chill developed between them. Her eyes were soft and her voice was calm though she felt anything but.
"Enzo, we're fine. Just talking through some things. You can go inside, I'll be in, in a minute."
"If he's hurt you, Bonnie, I'm not going inside," Enzo declared, looking at Damon. "Whatever he has to say to you he can say in front of me, can't he?"
Damon rolled his eyes at that as he stepped in and Enzo remained tall as they met glares.
"She doesn't need you as a bodyguard, in case you didn't get the message," he snapped, and Enzo let out a dry laugh.
"Oh, I heard her, perfectly clear. But you, my friend, should probably watch your tone when it comes to me."
"Or what?" Damon asked boldly as he stepped up, and Enzo clenched his jaw. "You'll smother me to death like you're doing with Bonnie?"
"Guys," she said through her teeth, but Enzo seemed to ignore her as he moved in closer towards Damon with a grin filtering on his lips.
"If I didn't know any better, Damon, I'd say you were jealous… of me," Enzo shot back as he tilted his head. "You always have been, haven't you? Because I was with Bonnie. That's what this is about, isn't it? You've now suddenly discovered you've got feelings for her and you actually think that you have a chance? I knew that things felt a bit off between us these past few months, but I chalked it up to the fact that you were caught in the middle of all of our drama. But there's more to it isn't there? This is what's really going on? You trying to swoop in on my ex like the bottom feeder you are?"
Damon shook his head with a laugh as he stepped in, curled fists at his side, and he looked him dead in the eyes as Enzo remained focused.
He placed a hand on his shoulder.
"This isn't the time or place, Enzo. And while I appreciate the fact that you think you know what's going on, you don't. So, you should just drop it and go inside. Have another drink. Don't stir the pot. Not tonight."
"Why not?" the man asked, shoving Damon at the chest with a renewed anger and boldness in his eyes. "We're all friends here so tell me the truth. Do you have feelings for her or not?"
"Enzo stop this now," Bonnie ordered as he turned to face her and she shook her head. "Please— "
"What about you, love? Do you have feelings for him?" He asked and suddenly her stomach tightened as he stared harshly into her eyes. "Do you feel something for Damon? Your pathetic best friend who has clearly been lusting over you for years, but was too much of a bitch to do anything about it? Here's your chance to make his day," Enzo said sarcastically, and she remained tall though if she were honest, his interrogation was making her feel a bit microscopic.
"I—"she started and suddenly realized she was tongue tied by the unexpected question as Damon stood there quietly, and their eyes met because it was finally the moment of truth.
They'd been hiding for months, specifically because of the person in front of them and now it seemed like this was it—the chance to finally be free of this burden they'd both held onto for far too long, when they both should have just been honest ages ago.
Bonnie dug her heel at the concrete and Enzo's expression changed from one of jested inquiry to quiet desperation as he tried to look in her eyes and she wouldn't look into his directly for a moment until he called her name again.
"Bonnie. You're not serious."
"Yes," she swallowed hard and his look of confusion turned to immediate devastation in seconds flat. "I… have feelings for Damon. I'm… in love with him," she said evenly though her entire body was shaking. "He's the reason I…" she stopped as she felt her stomach twisting into knots and Damon stood there quietly, with his hands at his sides as she struggled to get through it. "I cheated on you, Enzo. And I'm sorry. I'm really sorry."
Enzo's eyes widened at that and he turned to face Damon whose solemn expression confirmed what she had just said. He took in a deep breath and looked at Bonnie again; her heart was suddenly pounding out of her chest when he looked into her eyes and took a slow step in.
Suddenly she was terrified, but she stood her ground as she didn't back away, she just stood there. Ready to take whatever verbal assault his mind was building because surely, he was going to have a lot to say. And maybe she deserved it.
"You fucked him?" He asked bluntly and she responded with a non-verbal nod as his eyes suddenly went dark as well as his voice. "When?"
"The… night before our wedding. We never did anything before that," she exhaled as his eyes narrowed even more. "But that's why I couldn't go through with it… Damon was the reason why I left you. I didn't love you anymore, Enzo… I'm so sorry— "
"And he's the guy you've been seeing? There never was a 'co-worker' was there? You just kept fucking Damon," he said lowly and she didn't respond as he licked his tongue slowly across his teeth. "Answer me, Bonnie, I swear to God— "
"Yes," she shot back, and his eyes deepened. "Yes, I slept with Damon and I thought it was a mistake. But a few weeks later when I saw him again and we talked about what happened I knew that I had feelings for him. And I couldn't fight against them anymore. So I— "
"Continued everything. Continued to lie about it and you avoided me because you hoped it would all go away. You thought this would all blow over."
"I didn't. I just didn't know how to tell you. And I wanted to, I did. We talked about it at length. I was ready to tell you this afternoon too. It's been killing me holding onto this Enzo— "
"Yeah I'm sure," he quipped, and she exhaled the breath she felt like she was holding in for an hour. "You said that you love him. You're in love with him," he interrupted her and Bonnie immediately felt dizzy at the revelation but she nodded and Enzo laughed humorlessly as he stepped in again towards her, until they were nose to nose and his hand grabbed her wrist. "So not only are you a fucking slut but you're also a dumb one too— "
Damon immediately stepped forward as Bonnie ripped her hand out of his grip and he stepped in front of her as her eyes filled with tears.
"Don't put your hands on her, what is wrong with you?" Damon spat as Enzo's eyes glowered. "If you wanna verbally abuse someone, put your hands on anybody, pick that fight with me, not her."
Bonnie rubbed her wrist and swallowed hard as she watched Damon's eyes that were suddenly wild with hostility as he stood between them in the slowly brimming volatile situation. She felt thankful that he was there, she realized, because even though things had never gotten physical between she and Enzo before she had to admit to herself that this wasn't the first time he'd called her out of her name in an argument. And by the look on his face, it wasn't about to be the last as he stared at Damon, enraged, though his voice stayed tranquil.
"You think I would hurt her? I would never do that," Enzo said as Damon still watched him carefully. "You know, despite how much of a little trollop she turned out to be, I wouldn't ever hurt her. But I guess that's what you like about her isn't it? Because she's easy?"
It was then that Damon saw red.
He immediately had Enzo by the shoulders as he pushed then pinned him to the ground and punched him in the face. Enzo grabbed him by the throat and kicked him in the stomach and the rest suddenly became a blur and a full out brawl, as Bonnie screamed at them both to stop it, as tears streamed down her already rosy cheeks.
He could barely hear her over the sound of his own rage.
They went blow for blow, punch for punch for what felt like forever before Damon felt a pair of hands yanking him off of Enzo and he recognized Alaric's voice in his ear, as he pulled him away and Nora helped Enzo off the ground, as terror filled her eyes and she held him up by the shoulder until another one of Bonnie's co-workers, Mason Lockwood, ran over to help.
There were suddenly dozens of people outside watching the scene as it unfolded, speaking in hushed whispers as Damon and Enzo both stood to their feet, bruised and bloody as Damon wiped his nose with his palm and Alaric handed him a handkerchief from his suit pocket to stop the bleeding.
Mason was pulling Enzo away as he clutched his face and Damon held onto his ribs as he watched the man escorting him through the terrace while Nora hung back and stood next to Bonnie. She had no idea what the hell was happening, but she wrapped her arms around her shoulders as Bonnie cried hysterically, trying to calm her down.
But Enzo wasn't done yet. Not before he had one final thing to say.
"Everyone, I'd like to gather your attention please," he said as he stopped in his tracks and the whispering patrons ceased conversation for a moment to listen to him hopefully explain what the hell went on, as he rubbed his bloody jaw and projected his voice. "Here's to Bonnie Bennett—this smart, loyal, beautiful woman that you've all come to know, love, and respect as a colleague… Clap it up for her, because she none of those things. In fact, she's just a lying, cheating whore. And I hope that tonight's events better persuade you to really assess her character because in my opinion? She has none. She'll never be anything more than a poor little rich girl who got by on her daddy's money and it's a shame because there was hope for her, as an Occult's professor. Because she is cunning. And she's smart. Just not smart enough to realize who she was messing with."
Enzo stormed off at that and Bonnie swallowed hard when she suddenly heard a swarm of hushed whispers and eyes landing on her from each and every direction as the crowd began to talk.
She turned around and walked away silently, sinking into her shame as Nora tried to stop her but she was already gone. Damon walked after her, followed her out into the parking lot, and she stopped him with both hands up as her eyes were heavy with tears and she shook her head.
"Please don't," she said but he was hugging her anyway and she, without hesitation, clutched onto him tightly as she instantly sobbed onto his shoulder.
Her eyes were shut, and she felt as his hand held the back of her head as she cried. She didn't even look up when Alaric and Nora found them; the man letting out a deep sigh as he fished for his keys in his pocket to take them home.
But they didn't leave. They remained like that for the next few minutes. Possibly the next hour. She wasn't sure. She just knew that she never wanted to let him go.
Especially not when she had lost so much, so fast, already.
A/N: hey y'all! So, for those of you who have been waiting for the truth to finally come out here it was, and was it as bad as you expected? Honestly it made me sad and mad even writing it, but I wanted to make it as devastating as possible for all parties involved and I'm sorry to anyone who may have been rooting for Enzo in this story. Do you still feel the same, after he onslaught on both Bonnie especially and Damon? Honestly the worst thing a man can do to a woman he loves in my opinion is assault and/or degrade her and he defffffff walked the line on the first one and FOR SURE is guilty of the second so yeah… Looks like Enzo the Good Guy is not here, any more. Also how did we feel about Alaric this chapter as well as Nora? I love Nora in canon because she was adorable but I normally dislike Alaric, so in an effort not to let my personal feelings change how I write this story I tried to make him a good ass friend who could snap Damon out of the dumb self-loathing shit he got himself into. Do you think it worked? Also, what's next for Bonnie and Damon now that everybody (AND THEY MAMA'S MAMA) knows about what they did? Only time will tell. As always thank you for reading this messy ass, dramatic ass, tragic ass story. I never said it would be a happy one lol. Xoxo and R&R! Until next time.