AN: I know it's not the norm, and big age differences between couples are usually frowned upon. If it's not your cup of tea then just stop reading. As far as I'm concerned, both Arizona and Callie are two consenting adults. Please enlighten me with facts and actual laws as to why Arizona is jailbait? Isn't it hypocritical though to be so against the age difference in this story yet Grey's Anatomy is full of couples with huge age gaps.
Take Derek and Meredith or Christina and Preston Burke. Meredith and Christina were still interns when they started a relationship with them. From interns to full pledged attendings specializing in neuro or cardiothoracic, that would have to be atleast 7-8 years of training apart. 9-10 if we include diplomate and specialty exams. But Derek and Preston were already renowned in their field at that time so that would entail more years. So in my estimate (realistically speaking and coming from someone in the medical field) Meredith and Derek, and Christina and Burke would have about 11-15 years age difference. I couldn't recall any mention of their ages in the show though so correct me if I'm wrong.
Your strong reactions especially of disgust are attacks on people who are in relationships with huge age differences. These people have done nothing wrong, haven't done anything against the law (as long as both partners are of consenting age), they only fell in love. And if you're against people falling in love outside of the norm, then you shouldn't be reading a love story between two women in the first place.
I'm constantly questioned about my age because I started practicing medicine at the age of 23. You can't belittle someone's maturity or their abilities and their right to decide for themselves just because they're younger than you. The age of consent and the legal marrying age in a lot of countries is 18, and it is 18 for many reasons. If the law deems someone mature enough to marry at 18, who are you to judge that 19 is too young to be reasonable enough to know what love actually is. Who are you to say that falling in love with a 19 year old person because of their personality, their kindness and good heart is a perversion.
Anyway back to the stor
Arizona's POV
I didn't get much sleep last night. I tossed and I turned, my brain churning with all possible scenarios. Callie is getting divorced. But what could that mean for me? It could be nothing actually, or it could be everything. Now that Callie is free, would she want me the same way I want her?
It's 5:45 am, just a little before sunrise. My mom is still fast asleep. I make my way downstairs, I couldn't sleep anyway might as well grab an early morning snack. I make my way to the kitchen straight to the fridge. I'm kind of in the mood for some shrimp fried rice, I guess cooking up some might clear my head for a bit. As I open the door of the refrigerator, I notice the backdoor open. My mind suddenly goes to overdrive, and I practically sprint to the door. Did someone break in?
I pop my head outside the door and look around, my eyes adjusting to the darkness with a little bit if sun breaking through. I seemed to have audibly breathed a sigh of relief as I see Calliope sitting on the edge of the back porch draped with my blanket.
She seemed to have been startled by my sudden arrival. Her gaze quickly swung towards me and her eyes widen in horror. Once it registered to her that it is in fact just me, her face visibly relaxed and gave me a small smile of acknowledgement.
I gingerly walk towards where she's seated and I settle beside her.
"Why are you up so early?," I ask. I now notice that she's nursing a warm mug of what I assume to be hot chocolate. Callie doesn't drink anything caffeinated.
"Just waiting for the sunrise," she replies simply.
"You? Why are you awake at the break of dawn?," she asks.
"Can't sleep," I reply.
Then we just sit there, in silence. I have so many questions, I have so much to say, but I can't seem to bring myself to say anything.
"I love to watch the sunrise," she begins, and I turn my gaze towards her to watch her while she speaks.
"I love to smell the early morning breeze, I love to feel dew on grass and leaves. I love watching the sky change colors. I have had my heart broken plenty of times, and every morning when I feel my chest constricting, and as if the pain is suffocating me, I just go sit in our balcony and I watch the sun rise," she says with a somber tone.
I can feel the pain in her voice and I couldn't help but reach out for her hand. I intertwine our fingers and I grasp her hand tightly.
"I've missed you," she admits with a small smile, and I feel my heart pound at her admission
"I've missed you too," I reply.
"What happened to you?," she asks with a faint tone.
"I'm sorry," was all I was able to say.
"I'm sorry too, for whatever it is I've done to push you away," she says with a sad smile.
"Please stop that," I reply.
"Stop what?"
"Stop saying sorry for everything. Sometimes you're just too nice and take the blame for everything even if it's not your fault," I say facing her.
"Okay," she concedes. She scoots closer to me, and envelopes me with my blanket currently draped on her then she puts her head on my shoulder. I tighten my grip on her hand and put a chaste kiss on her head.
"You smell nice," I comment relishing how easy it is to be with her despite the circumstances surrounding us.
"I feel filthy, I haven't showered since yesterday morning," she comments as she pokes me on the side.
"Nu-uh, you smell wonderful, you smell like you," I retort.
Then Callie just nuzzles her face on my neck.
"I saw you and Richard, then I ran away. I'm sorry, I know it's not my place to feel that way, but I just couldn't take it," I say breaking the comfortable silence that has surrounded us.
"You saw us? When? Well, he hasn't been in my house for weeks," she replies.
"Uhmm…I'm sorry but I didn't mean to. It was the night we had dinner, when you invited me for tacos. I just finished tucking Sofia in, and I came down to the kitchen to help you fix up, then I saw you and Richard…. Being intimate," I say, struggling to finish the sentence. I can feel the familiar lump in my throat and the sharp pang in my chest.
"Arizona…. ," she begins but I cut her off. I just need to get everything out or I'll die of embarrassment.
"I know it's not my place, and I understand that you're a married couple and that's what married people do, but I just can't bear to see the one I love with someone else, so I ran, and I deflected, and I looked for a distraction, and I've been so terrible to you when you haven't done me wrong. I abandoned you at your time of need, and I'm your friend first above all else…," I begin to ramble but Callie cuts me off.
"Arizona…," she cuts off.
"And I shouldn't have been so rude.. and then Eliza…," I continue, but Callie turns my head gently towards her so our eyes meet.
"Nothing happened," she declares.
"Oh," my eyes wide with that revelation.
"It's been a while since Richard and I had been intimate last. As I've said before, I was falling out of love with him, and I just couldn't find it in myself to be with him in that way," Callie starts to explain.
"We just had a heated and intense discussion the day before that night, then Richard stormed out. I was expecting for him to disappear again for weeks like he did last time, then to my surprise, he came home the night we had dinner. He was drunk though, very drunk, then he came home wailing, crying, and I held him for a while, but he started getting frisky, and before I know it he was stripping in front of me and kissing me everywhere. So before he got too carried away, I stopped him, told him to take a shower and sober up," Callie narrated, and suddenly I felt so silly yet it was as if a huge suffocating weight was lifted off my chest.
"Oh, okay," was all I could muster at this point, and I just gaze off into the distance, trying to figure out a way to bring up her divorce. But before I could say anything, Callie speaks again.
"So….you love me?," she asks inquisitively, and only then did I realize my slip. In the most unromantic ramble, I accidentally confessed to her that I'm in love with her.
I feel my palms sweating and my chest pounding. I'm not ready to tell her, and I feel like a deer caught in the headlights. I panicked so in instinct, I try to pull away from her, but she clutches me tightly and just pulls me closer to her.
"Please don't run away again," she pleads with me.
I ease into my previous position beside her, and I clasp her hand reassuringly, silently telling her that I'm not running away this time.
"I did this all wrong," Callie begins.
"I was a mess, with troubles with my marriage and trying to figure out my feelings for you, my brain got all messed up. And I handled things with you so poorly, I jumped right in without thinking, and I'm so sorry for dragging you into my mess," she continues, and my heart drops with every statement she utters. I can feel where this is going so…
"I'm sorry Callie, I promise I'll be out of your hair," I say a little bit harshly as I try to pull away again.
"No," Callie declares sternly.
"Just please, listen, we did all of this so wrong, we never communicated properly and we let our emotions get ahead of us, just please listen," she pleads.
"I love you," she says, and my eyes go wide and I look at her quite shocked at her confession.
"I love you in a way that I can't quite comprehend yet, it's very confusing because I'm not supposed to, but I care for you immensely. I think about you all the time. I see something funny and interesting, and I immediately think of sharing it with you. I wake up hoping I can spend the day with you. You're gorgeous, breathtaking, very mature for your age, brilliant and so very kind. You amaze me, and I admire everything about you. But as I said, I care for you, and I don't want you to get hurt. I love you, but my fear of hurting you is stopping me from falling completely in love with you. I love you like a friend, a confidant, family and definitely as something more than that, but as of now I honestly don't know what can be of us. You're too precious and important for me to just let you be an impulse lay or a rebound," Callie explains.
I just nod as I try to digest every word Callie is saying. She loves me, but maybe not the same as I love her? But maybe she loves me but she doesn't want a relationship with me? I don't even know what hurts more, not being loved or being loved yet not being together?
"So what do we do now?," I ask with obvious vulnerability and frustration in my voice.
"I'm getting divorced, but probably Barb has already told you," Callie says. I just nod acknowledging her revelation.
"It's been coming for quite a while. Richard and I had been drifting apart. I don't want you or anyone to think that you're the reason for the divorce because even if you hadn't come along, Richard and I would eventually get divorced. It would be messy, people would be talking, and I don't want you to get caught in the middle of it," she says.
"I understand," I reply as I slump my head in defeat. She's right, everything she has said makes sense. I was just too blinded by love to see it
"But when all these blow over, when I finally get back on my feet, and if you're still single and interested, I would like to court you," Callie says finally, looking at me with hope in her eyes and a small smile gracing her lips.
"Uhmm, court…me?," I say carefully. Enunciating each word carefully just to make sure I'm hearing correct.
Callie faces me and takes both my hands in hers.
"Yes Arizona, court you, woo you, make you feel special and make you fall in love with me. We did this all wrong, and I'm hoping that once everything is sorted out, once I've fixed my life, we can have another shot at this the right way. I can't say how long it would take, and I'm not expecting you to wait for me, I just hope that when the timing is right, you'll be willing to give us a chance." Callie says.
Right then and there, I was already swept of my feet.
"I'm already in love with you, you don't have to do anything anymore," I reply.
"But I want to treat you the way someone as amazing as you is to be treated. That's the least I can do for you if ever you decide to give us a chance. It would be difficult right off the bat, anything with me would be complicated, " Calliope says.
"We can do it together," I say as I caress her cheek with the palm of my hand.
As the sun slowly breaks through the darkness, I gently press my lips on Callie's as we bask in the feeling of a new beginning.
Callie's POV
I'm having an amazing day already. It's only 10 am and just a little after breakfast, but I already feel like I'm floating. Arizona loves me, and I can definitely feel that I'm falling for her. I know it's bad timing, and we have agreed to not rush into things, I've actually encouraged her to not actively wait for me and she should explore her options, but at least we have hope. In this turbulent moment of my life, Arizona gives me hope.
Barb and I decided to shop at a nearby farmer's market, and she has graciously volunteered me to cook a late lunch. While Barb and I meticulously inspected the pears and oranges, Arizona and are right behind us as they snack on 2 fresh bananas we just bought from a stall we visited earlier. Arizona and I had been throwing stolen glances and smiles at each other every time Barb and Sofia get distracted by something.
"Cal?,"
"Callie,?" Barbara calls out.
"Uhm, yeah?;" I ask as I turn my attention to her?
"I was just asking about the prawns, but you seem to be somewhere else," Barb teases.
I feel my face flushing since I almost got caught staring at Arizona as she lifts Sofia up so the little girl could Oohh and Aaahh at the live fish in a tank.
"I'm sorry, I was just mulling over getting some of the beautiful beets I saw a couple of booths back," I reply sheepishly.
"Well thinking about those beets is making you beet red," Barb teases.
"Oh shut up," I banter with her.
"Are you seeing anyone I'm not aware of Cal?," Barb questions.
And I heard Arizona suddenly choking on her banana a few feet away. I guess she heard that.
"No, why would you think that?," I say a little too defensively. Well, in my defense I really am not seeing anyone officially.
"Well….I mean yeah, you're sad and kind of stressed because of your divorce, but for someone who's having a divorce, you just seem….bright, and shiny," Barb teases.
"I'm not bright and shiny," I defend.
"Well, you've got this stupid smile on your face that says otherwise.," Barb retorts.
"I'm just happy to see you," I emphasize by swinging my arm over her shoulder.
Later that night
We had a movie night in the Masters bedroom, and my little girl fell asleep in Barbs bed. The girls decided to have a sleepover instead, and who am I to deny them.
I went back to Arizona's room to get some stuff, but I was distracted by a shelf full of what seem to be photo albums. I was sidetracked by a big pink and yellow book, and the next thing I know, I was scrolling through Arizona's baby pictures.
In the first page is a picture of the second cutest baby I have ever seen, of course the first one being Sofia. It is of a blonde chubby baby with full red cheeks, piercing ocean blue eyes, and some wisps of blonde hair. I didn't know that Arizona was a bald baby until around 11 months old.
There were pictures of her first bath, pictures of her crawling, standing, in a walker. Then there's a picture of what I assume to be her first outing where she was being held by a chicken mascot and Arizona is wailing, her face all scrunched and teary and she's flushed all over due to crying.
I couldn't help but laugh out loud, and the next thing I know, the door swings open.
"Oh no you didn't," Arizona exclaims, and I can already tell she's ready to pounce on me.
I flash her a huge teasing grin, this is too fun for me to cave, so she rushes to me ready to snatch the book from my hands. I was quick to move it away from her reach.
"This is too embarrassing, just shut that photo album now," Arizona whines as she struggles to steal the book away. I maneuver my body so that I'm leaning sideways on the bed and the book is an arms length away. Arizona is almost on top of me as I use my shoulders to block her from the prized book.
"Please," Arizona pouts and gives me big puppy dog eyes.
I shake my head no, and flash her a teasing smile, and only then did I realize how close our bodies were.
The air suddenly feels thick, and I can smell Arizona due to her proximity. Arizona had stopped pouting now, and the previous puppy dog eyes had changed to an intense gaze. I can see her cerulean eyes darkening, and I just gulp at the intensity of her gaze. I feel my body being magnetized to her, and we're getting closer and closer to each other. Then just as our faces are merely inches apart, the photo album slides out of my hand and falls on the floor. The loud bang snaps us out of our trance, and we shift our positions so Arizona is sitting beside me.
Arizona seems to rattled to notice that I had retrieved the fallen book, and once she turns her attention to me once again, I have the book in my lap already.
"Fine," she huffs.
I flip the book open in a random page, and laughter immediately escaped my lips as a 3 year old topless Arizona is aboard a tricycle with her face half smudged with peanut butter. On her left hand is a peanut butter sandwich while her right expertly navigates her blue and yellow tricycle.
"You were quite the badass huh," I comment as Arizona peers at her own picture.
"I just had this weird addiction with peanut butter sandwiches," she says.
I flip the album once again and I see a picture of Barb and Arizona with Arizona wearing green cargo pants and a pink spaghetti strap and her hair in pigtails.
"You have quite the fashion sense there," I say teasingly.
"I was fascinated with boy things, and boy clothes, but mom wants me to wear pink and sparkly stuff. Up until I was three I thought I would grow a penis just like my guy playmates, but I outgrew it eventually and mom's pink and sparkly stuff grew on me," Arizona narrates, and I just couldn't help but laugh.
"You really thought you'd grow a penis?," I say In between laughs. I've been laughing too much that tears had started to form on the corner of my eyes.
"Yeah yeah laugh all you want," Arizona says.
"You're such a cutie. You were too cute when you were a baby," I exclaim.
"Oh yeah? Don't you find me cute now," she says suggestively with a little wiggle of her eyebrows.
"Haha, you're a little too full of yourself aren't you?," I comment kiddingly.
"So you're saying I'm not cute?," Arizona retorts feigning hurt.
Arizona likes playing, well let's see what happens when I turn the tables.
I suddenly cup her cheek tenderly and I place a soft kiss on her other cheek, and I whisper sweetly in her ear "You're beautiful,".
Arizona freezes for a while.
"You shouldn't do that," she says softly.
"Why?, I'm sorry if I crossed the line," I reply quite concerned with her sudden change in demeanor.
"Because we agreed to take things slowly," she responds.
"Well it's not exactly taking things to the next level," I say with a soft giggle.
"But it would be extra hard to control myself around you especially since we would have to bunk together," Arizona replies.
"Bunk together?," I ask with my brows furrowing in confusion.
"Sofia fell asleep cuddled next to mom, so mom didn't want to get up and disturb Sofia, so she suggested we just share this room tonight," Arizona explain.
"Oh," was all I was able to say.
AN2: Sooooooo…